I need a big wedding but my fiancée doesn’t.
I have always wanted a big wedding.
The type of wedding I want would cost 30K CAD.
My lovely woman is totally against the idea. Together we have 28K in debt. We have no savings and our house needs renovations. She wants to elope and have a nice honeymoon. That would cost far less and we could pay our debt and have savings. My fiancée even offered a tiny wedding with just our immediate family but that isn’t what I want. I told her that I MUST have a big wedding or else I will be very unhappy.
So now my fiancée is very angry all the time. My fiancée can’t sleep because she’s worried about money and she hates being the centre of attention. I hate being constantly yelled at about how stupid a big wedding would be.
My parents have told me that spending so much on one day is not a smart choice. They don’t know about our debt and lack of savings. If they did, they would probably yell at me and tell me to listen to my fiancé.
I don’t know what to do because I need a big wedding but I don’t like to see my fiancée so stressed. What should I do?
The type of wedding I want would cost 30K CAD.
My lovely woman is totally against the idea. Together we have 28K in debt. We have no savings and our house needs renovations. She wants to elope and have a nice honeymoon. That would cost far less and we could pay our debt and have savings. My fiancée even offered a tiny wedding with just our immediate family but that isn’t what I want. I told her that I MUST have a big wedding or else I will be very unhappy.
So now my fiancée is very angry all the time. My fiancée can’t sleep because she’s worried about money and she hates being the centre of attention. I hate being constantly yelled at about how stupid a big wedding would be.
My parents have told me that spending so much on one day is not a smart choice. They don’t know about our debt and lack of savings. If they did, they would probably yell at me and tell me to listen to my fiancé.
I don’t know what to do because I need a big wedding but I don’t like to see my fiancée so stressed. What should I do?
Bypassing a big wedding was the 1st major decision my wife & i made. But, my wife didn't want one nor did I. We eloped (included some friends & family) and then went on a vaction/honeymoon later that year.
In your case, you have no business planning a big wedding with that kind of debt! Elope. Think of this as your first compromise. She will eventually do that same for you.
In your case, you have no business planning a big wedding with that kind of debt! Elope. Think of this as your first compromise. She will eventually do that same for you.
First of all, you don't NEED a big wedding, you want a big, expensive wedding.
But as a new husband you'll have responsibilities that are larger than individual wants. You'll need to consider what your new family NEEDS and put that before any individual wants.
Why not be smart and do a smaller, less expensive wedding today and use the excess cash you would have spent to renovate the house, pay down the debt and / or begin a very necessary investment/savings account for the future success of your marriage?
Then, in five years or ten, with more sound financial planning, you should be able to afford a grand 10th anniversary blown out to renew your vows IF you're still married at that time.
Sure, this way doesn't get what you want right now but part of being mature, of being a husband is sacrificing your wants and needs for the family's needs and wants.
Be smart. Listen you your future wife, to your parents. They love you and want what's best for you and honestly, spending 30K CAD on a one day blow-out wedding would be an unsound decision. Do you really want to begin your new life as a married couple by spending money better, smarter used for more important things?
The important thing in this is the life long marriage, not the one day event of a wedding.
But as a new husband you'll have responsibilities that are larger than individual wants. You'll need to consider what your new family NEEDS and put that before any individual wants.
Why not be smart and do a smaller, less expensive wedding today and use the excess cash you would have spent to renovate the house, pay down the debt and / or begin a very necessary investment/savings account for the future success of your marriage?
Then, in five years or ten, with more sound financial planning, you should be able to afford a grand 10th anniversary blown out to renew your vows IF you're still married at that time.
Sure, this way doesn't get what you want right now but part of being mature, of being a husband is sacrificing your wants and needs for the family's needs and wants.
Be smart. Listen you your future wife, to your parents. They love you and want what's best for you and honestly, spending 30K CAD on a one day blow-out wedding would be an unsound decision. Do you really want to begin your new life as a married couple by spending money better, smarter used for more important things?
The important thing in this is the life long marriage, not the one day event of a wedding.
No.
You need food.
You need shelter.
You need cloths.
You need medical treatment.
But you definitely don't need glamorous indulgence to survive.
You need food.
You need shelter.
You need cloths.
You need medical treatment.
But you definitely don't need glamorous indulgence to survive.
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