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Why We Can't Sleep
- Women's New Midlife Crisis
- Narrado por: Ada Calhoun
- Duración: 5 h y 48 m
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Resumen del Editor
A generation-defining examination of the new midlife crisis facing Gen X women and the unique circumstances that have brought them to this point, Why We Can’t Sleep is a lively successor to Passages by Gail Sheehy and The Defining Decade by Meg Jay.
When Ada Calhoun found herself in the throes of a midlife crisis, she thought that she had no right to complain. She was married with children and a good career. So why did she feel miserable? And why did it seem that other Generation X women were miserable, too?
Calhoun decided to find some answers. She looked into housing costs, HR trends, credit card debt averages, and divorce data. At every turn, she saw a pattern: sandwiched between the Boomers and Millennials, Gen X women were facing new problems as they entered middle age, problems that were being largely overlooked.
Speaking with women across America about their experiences as the generation expected to “have it all”, Calhoun found that most were exhausted, terrified about money, under-employed, and overwhelmed. Instead of their issues being heard, they were told to lean in, take “me time”, or make a chore chart to get their lives and homes in order.
In Why We Can’t Sleep, Calhoun opens up the cultural and political contexts of Gen X’s predicament and offers solutions for how to pull oneself out of the abyss - and keep the next generation from falling in. The result is reassuring, empowering, and essential listening for all middle-aged women, and anyone who hopes to understand them.
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
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Go Behind the Scenes of Why We Can't Sleep
Editor's Pick
Here we are now, validate us
"Being "seen" is a decidedly Gen Z and millennial aspiration, but even us aging Gen-Xers—famously misanthropic, pessimistic, and nonconformist—have a primal need for acknowledgement. As a 45-year-old mother of two, child of divorced parents (one of whom is of failing health), I felt 100% #seen by Ada Calhoun’s glorious paean to the plight of the modern middle-aged woman. Informed by her extremely viral article for O magazine ("The New Midlife Crisis"), Why We Can’t Sleep is sensitively reported, exhaustively researched, and full of so-funny-because-it’s-so-painfully-true moments. If you feel the full weight of the mental load of parenting up, down, and sideways, I promise you’ll feel validated by Calhoun’s message." —Courtney R., Audible Editor
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What does it mean to be an adult? In the 20th century, psychologists came up with five markers of adulthood: finish your education, get a job, leave home, marry, and have children. Since then, every generation has been held to those same markers. Yet so much has changed about the world and living in it since that sequence was formulated. All of those markers are choices, and they’re all valid, but any one person’s choices along those lines do not make them more or less an adult.
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Not the book that was advertised
- De M. Rogers en 04-13-21
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Selfish, Shallow, and Self-Absorbed
- Sixteen Writers on the Decision Not to Have Kids
- De: Meghan Daum
- Narrado por: Johnny Heller, Jo Anna Perrin
- Duración: 7 h y 40 m
- Versión completa
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One of the main topics of cultural conversation during the last decade was the supposed "fertility crisis" and whether modern women could figure out a way to have it all - a successful, demanding career and the required 2.3 children - before their biological clocks stopped ticking. Now, however, conversation has turned to whether it's necessary to have it all (see Anne-Marie Slaughter) or, perhaps more controversial, whether children are really a requirement for a fulfilling life.
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Am I the only sane childfree woman in here?
- De J. Malouin en 09-29-15
De: Meghan Daum
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Overwhelmed
- Work, Love, and Play When No One Has the Time
- De: Brigid Schulte
- Narrado por: Tavia Gilbert
- Duración: 12 h y 6 m
- Versión completa
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According to the Leisure Studies Department at the University of Iowa, true leisure is “that place in which we realize our humanity.” If that’s true, argues Brigid Schulte, then we're doing dangerously little realizing of our humanity. In Overwhelmed, Schulte, a staff writer for The Washington Post, asks: Are our brains, our partners, our culture, and our bosses making it impossible for us to experience anything but “contaminated time”?
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Depressing, Dreary Listening Experience
- De Deb A en 04-19-15
De: Brigid Schulte
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Say Yes to What’s Next
- How to Age with Elegance and Class While Never Losing Your Beauty and Sass!
- De: Lori Allen
- Narrado por: Lori Allen
- Duración: 6 h y 8 m
- Versión completa
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Women today are facing so much uncertainty - about life and the future. The need to pivot is stronger than ever, but many of us feel powerless to change or simply don’t know how to take that essential first step. For Lori Allen, business owner, breast cancer survivor, and star of TLC’s Say Yes to the Dress: Atlanta, these vital life lessons are the inspiration for her new book. Say Yes to What’s Next is more than just a guide for our best tomorrows, it’s the beginning of a life-makeover movement for women of all ages.
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Every woman approaching her 50s and beyond should have this book in her arsenal!
- De Julie C. en 08-04-20
De: Lori Allen
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It's Not You
- 27 (Wrong) Reasons You're Single
- De: Sara Eckel
- Narrado por: Nina Alvamar
- Duración: 4 h y 2 m
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Based on her popular Modern Love column, Sara Eckel’s It’s Not You challenges these myths, encouraging singletons to stop picking apart their personalities and to start tapping into their own wisdom about who and what is right for them. Supported by the latest psychological and sociological research, as well as interviews with people who have experienced longtime singledom, Eckel creates a strong and empowering argument to understand and accept that there’s no one reason why you’re single - you just are.
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Good Book
- De Anonymous User en 05-24-20
De: Sara Eckel
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How to Be Fine
- What We Learned by Living by the Rules of 50 Self-Help Books
- De: Jolenta Greenberg, Kristen Meinzer
- Narrado por: Jolenta Greenberg, Kristen Meinzer
- Duración: 4 h y 54 m
- Versión completa
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In each episode of their podcast By the Book, Jolenta Greenberg and Kristen Meinzer take a deep dive into a different self-help book, following its specific instructions, rules, and advice to the letter. From diet and productivity to decorating to social interactions, they try it all, record themselves along the way, then share what they’ve learned with their devoted and growing audience of fans who tune in.
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Disappointed
- De doughswan en 10-23-20
De: Jolenta Greenberg, y otros
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No Stopping Us Now
- The Adventures of Older Women in American History
- De: Gail Collins
- Narrado por: Gail Collins, Tanya Eby
- Duración: 13 h y 27 m
- Versión completa
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In her lively social history of American women and aging, acclaimed New York Times columnist Gail Collins illustrates the ways in which age is an arbitrary concept that has swung back and forth over the centuries. From Plymouth Rock (when a woman was considered marriageable if "civil and under fifty years of age"), to a few generations later, when they were quietly retired to elderdom once they had passed the optimum age for reproduction, to recent decades, American attitudes towards age have been a moving target.
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amazing
- De Elaine Sharon Davis en 06-09-20
De: Gail Collins
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All the Single Ladies
- Unmarried Women and the Rise of an Independent Nation
- De: Rebecca Traister
- Narrado por: Candace Thaxton, Rebecca Traister - introduction
- Duración: 11 h y 39 m
- Versión completa
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In a provocative, groundbreaking work, National Magazine Award finalist Rebecca Traister, "the most brilliant voice on feminism in this country" (Anne Lamott), traces the history of unmarried women in America who, through social, political, and economic means, have radically shaped our nation.
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Excellent book, destroyed by narration
- De Theresa Holleran en 03-06-16
De: Rebecca Traister
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Drinking and Tweeting
- And Other Brandi Blunders
- De: Brandi Glanville, Leslie Bruce
- Narrado por: Brandi Glanville
- Duración: 5 h y 31 m
- Versión completa
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Fans have been waiting for Brandi’s scoop on one of the biggest divorces of the decade since her husband of eight years abandoned her and their two sons to marry country singer LeAnn Rimes. Not only does Brandi spill the beans about her side of the split, but the lovable housewife also shares the incredible wild ride that took her from a life in the ghetto to Hollywood’s most elite circles.
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Who edited this?
- De Jessica en 11-02-20
De: Brandi Glanville, y otros
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All the Rage
- Mothers, Fathers, and the Myth of Equal Partnership
- De: Darcy Lockman
- Narrado por: Abby Craden
- Duración: 8 h y 53 m
- Versión completa
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The inequity of domestic life is one of the most profound and perplexing conundrums of our time. In an era of seemingly unprecedented feminist activism, enlightenment, and change, data shows that one area of gender inequality stubbornly remains: the unequal amount of parental work that falls on women, no matter their class or professional status.
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Must read for men
- De Brooks Rainey Pearson en 06-12-19
De: Darcy Lockman
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The Wife Drought
- De: Annabel Crabb
- Narrado por: Annabel Crabb
- Duración: 7 h y 8 m
- Versión completa
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'I need a wife'. It's a common joke among women juggling work and family, but it's no joke. Having a spouse who takes care of things at home is a godsend on the domestic front and an asset on the work front and is an advantage enjoyed by vastly more men than women. Full of candid and funny stories from politics and the media, The Wife Drought shares intriguing research about the attitudes pulsing beneath the surface of egalitarian Australia.
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A read for everyone
- De RubyH en 02-01-24
De: Annabel Crabb
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A Good Provider Is One Who Leaves
- One Family and Migration in the 21st Century
- De: Jason DeParle
- Narrado por: Fred Sanders
- Duración: 11 h y 44 m
- Versión completa
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When Jason DeParle moved into the Manila slums with Tita Comodas and her family three decades ago, he never imagined his reporting on them would span three generations and turn into the defining chronicle of a new age - the age of global migration. In a monumental book that gives new meaning to "immersion journalism", DeParle paints an intimate portrait of an unforgettable family as they endure years of sacrifice and separation, willing themselves out of shantytown poverty into a new global middle class.
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Excellent and Important
- De Booklover en 03-22-20
De: Jason DeParle
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Getting to 50/50
- How Working Parents Can Have It All by Sharing It All - and Why It’s Good for Your Marriage, Your Career, Your Kids, and You
- De: Sharon Meers, Joanna Strober
- Narrado por: Marguerite Gavin
- Duración: 10 h y 16 m
- Versión completa
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Sharon Meers and Joanna Strober are professionals, wives, and mothers. They understand the challenges and rewards of two-career households. They also know that families thrive not in spite of working mothers but because of them. You can have a great career, a great marriage, and be a great mother. The key is tapping into your best resource and most powerful ally - the man you married.
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Great overall, but a bit offensive...
- De Tristan Matthews en 01-09-15
De: Sharon Meers, y otros
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My Time Among the Whites
- Notes from an Unfinished Education
- De: Jennine Capo Crucet
- Narrado por: Jennine Capo Crucet
- Duración: 4 h y 27 m
- Versión completa
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Raised in Miami and the daughter of Cuban refugees, Crucet examines the political and personal contours of American identity and the physical places where those contours find themselves smashed: be it a rodeo town in Nebraska, a university campus in upstate New York, or Disney World in Florida. Crucet illuminates how she came to see her exclusion from aspects of the theoretical American Dream, despite her family's attempts to fit in with white American culture - beginning with their ill-fated plan to name her after the winner of the Miss America pageant.
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Empowering
- De elvia en 10-23-19
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Life Reimagined
- The Science, Art, and Opportunity of Midlife
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- Narrado por: Barbara Bradley Hagerty
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There's no such thing as an inevitable midlife crisis, Barbara Bradley Hagerty writes in this provocative, hopeful book. It's a myth, an illusion. New scientific research explodes the fable that midlife is a time when things start to go downhill for everybody. In fact, midlife can be a great new adventure, when you can embrace fresh possibilities, purposes, and pleasures. In Life Reimagined, Hagerty explains that midlife is about renewal.
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For the wealthy
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A smart, personal, darkly funny examination of what it’s like to be a woman at the crossroads of a midlife crisis, from the New York Times best-selling author of People I Want to Punch in the Throat.
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Bad language
- De Lep73 en 02-26-23
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Excuse Me While I Disappear
- Tales of Midlife Mayhem
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- Narrado por: Hillary Huber
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Laurie Notaro has proved everyone wrong: she didn’t end up in rehab, prison, or cremated at a tender age. She just went gray. At past fifty, every hair’s root is a symbol of knowledge (she knows how to use a landline), experience (she rode in a car with no seat belts), and superpowers (a gray-haired lady can get away with anything). Though navigating midlife is initially upsetting—the cracking noises coming from her new old body, receiving regular junk mail from mortuaries—Laurie accepts it. And then some.
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Meh. Maybe funnier with a different narrator
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- De: Ada Calhoun
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Inspired by her wildly popular New York Times essay "The Wedding Toast I'll Never Give", Ada Calhoun provides a funny (but not flip), smart (but not smug) take on the institution of marriage. Weaving intimate moments from her own married life with frank insight from experts, clergy, and friends, she upends expectations of total marital bliss to present a realistic - but ultimately optimistic - portrait of what marriage is really like.
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Highly recommend!
- De Mrs.Chablis en 08-30-23
De: Ada Calhoun
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Also a Poet
- A Memoir
- De: Ada Calhoun
- Narrado por: Ada Calhoun, Lili Taylor, Josephine Brill
- Duración: 6 h y 33 m
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When Ada Calhoun stumbled upon old cassette tapes of interviews her father, celebrated art critic Peter Schjeldahl, had conducted for his never-completed biography of poet Frank O’Hara, she set out to finish the book her father had started 40 years earlier. As a lifelong O’Hara fan who grew up amid his bohemian cohort in the East Village, Calhoun thought the project would be easy, even fun, but the deeper she dove, the more she had to face not just O’Hara’s past, but also her father’s and her own.
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Pretty Interesting
- De Michele A. Cacano-Green en 08-02-22
De: Ada Calhoun
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Midlife Crisis
- Another Romance for the over 40
- De: L.B. Dunbar
- Narrado por: Teri Schnaubelt, Aaron Shedlock
- Duración: 10 h y 9 m
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Midge Everette: I'm 41 today. It's my birthday, and I'm crying over burnt toast. That's not some euphemism. Literally, I'm sobbing over crusty bread, so I call a crisis center. I just need someone to talk to about life. Only I recognize the smoky voice of the man on the line. Sweet cheese, don't let it be... Hank Paige: As a former rock star, I once had it all. Fame. Fortune. Females. Except for the one thing I wanted most. Then I lost everything. I fix cars now and restore other people's dreams. I just want to be somebody's someone.
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4.5 stars of mature romance goodness, bravo!
- De Liv en 10-23-19
De: L.B. Dunbar
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Life Reimagined
- The Science, Art, and Opportunity of Midlife
- De: Barbara Bradley Hagerty
- Narrado por: Barbara Bradley Hagerty
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Historia
There's no such thing as an inevitable midlife crisis, Barbara Bradley Hagerty writes in this provocative, hopeful book. It's a myth, an illusion. New scientific research explodes the fable that midlife is a time when things start to go downhill for everybody. In fact, midlife can be a great new adventure, when you can embrace fresh possibilities, purposes, and pleasures. In Life Reimagined, Hagerty explains that midlife is about renewal.
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For the wealthy
- De A Reader en 02-03-17
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Midlife Bites
- Anyone Else Falling Apart, or Is It Just Me?
- De: Jen Mann
- Narrado por: Jen Mann
- Duración: 7 h y 14 m
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General
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Narración:
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Historia
A smart, personal, darkly funny examination of what it’s like to be a woman at the crossroads of a midlife crisis, from the New York Times best-selling author of People I Want to Punch in the Throat.
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Bad language
- De Lep73 en 02-26-23
De: Jen Mann
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Excuse Me While I Disappear
- Tales of Midlife Mayhem
- De: Laurie Notaro
- Narrado por: Hillary Huber
- Duración: 5 h y 59 m
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General
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Narración:
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Historia
Laurie Notaro has proved everyone wrong: she didn’t end up in rehab, prison, or cremated at a tender age. She just went gray. At past fifty, every hair’s root is a symbol of knowledge (she knows how to use a landline), experience (she rode in a car with no seat belts), and superpowers (a gray-haired lady can get away with anything). Though navigating midlife is initially upsetting—the cracking noises coming from her new old body, receiving regular junk mail from mortuaries—Laurie accepts it. And then some.
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Meh. Maybe funnier with a different narrator
- De TK en 12-19-22
De: Laurie Notaro
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Wedding Toasts I'll Never Give
- De: Ada Calhoun
- Narrado por: Ada Calhoun
- Duración: 3 h y 17 m
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General
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Historia
Inspired by her wildly popular New York Times essay "The Wedding Toast I'll Never Give", Ada Calhoun provides a funny (but not flip), smart (but not smug) take on the institution of marriage. Weaving intimate moments from her own married life with frank insight from experts, clergy, and friends, she upends expectations of total marital bliss to present a realistic - but ultimately optimistic - portrait of what marriage is really like.
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Highly recommend!
- De Mrs.Chablis en 08-30-23
De: Ada Calhoun
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Also a Poet
- A Memoir
- De: Ada Calhoun
- Narrado por: Ada Calhoun, Lili Taylor, Josephine Brill
- Duración: 6 h y 33 m
- Grabación Original
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General
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Narración:
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Historia
When Ada Calhoun stumbled upon old cassette tapes of interviews her father, celebrated art critic Peter Schjeldahl, had conducted for his never-completed biography of poet Frank O’Hara, she set out to finish the book her father had started 40 years earlier. As a lifelong O’Hara fan who grew up amid his bohemian cohort in the East Village, Calhoun thought the project would be easy, even fun, but the deeper she dove, the more she had to face not just O’Hara’s past, but also her father’s and her own.
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Pretty Interesting
- De Michele A. Cacano-Green en 08-02-22
De: Ada Calhoun
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Midge Everette: I'm 41 today. It's my birthday, and I'm crying over burnt toast. That's not some euphemism. Literally, I'm sobbing over crusty bread, so I call a crisis center. I just need someone to talk to about life. Only I recognize the smoky voice of the man on the line. Sweet cheese, don't let it be... Hank Paige: As a former rock star, I once had it all. Fame. Fortune. Females. Except for the one thing I wanted most. Then I lost everything. I fix cars now and restore other people's dreams. I just want to be somebody's someone.
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4.5 stars of mature romance goodness, bravo!
- De Liv en 10-23-19
De: L.B. Dunbar
Lo que los oyentes dicen sobre Why We Can't Sleep
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- MommaBear
- 01-11-21
Depressing
I'm a cross-over (Xennial), but grew up in rural Montana where I joke everything is 10 years behind. I mostly find myself around Gen X folks, and am married to one. However I felt like this was 90% pity party, while a lot of the information is factual, it comes across as so ungrateful. Not for me.
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- AH
- 02-24-20
GenX Women Mid-Life Crisis is Real
At the expectations of boomers and millennials GenX women were meant to have it all. At the risk of their own sanity they have sought to having it all and although some have achieved catharsis many find themselves in crisis. A period in which identity itself is thrown into question and a perpetual anxiety of “Who am I?” And, “What am I doing this for? How did I get here? Where do I go from here?” Ada Calhoun summaries that experience and offers the solution to remember it’s not us and it won’t last forever. There is hope amongst the other GenX women in life. Find them, connect, complain, and be surrounded in endless supportive friends. Life is not over yet, hopefully soon mid-life will be.
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- Mel Kay
- 01-27-21
Speaking directly to me
As a 42yr old who’s been dealt with objectively unpleasant life circumstances the last few years (not to mention the macro level challenges), I felt every word of this! Thanks for putting into words why the last few years of my life have been plagued with so many challenges!
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- Kristin Hall
- 08-10-21
I feel heard and hopeful!
One of the most helpful books I have ever read/listened to! It was hard listening to what brought us here, but also I finally didn’t feel so alone. This whole book could almost have been all the stories of my life. It wrapped up with not of a feeling that we need to fix it all, and “be it all” but that we are survivors. We are the deciders of the narrative of ourselves.
Mainly, I feel understood to my core. I can’t honestly remember ever feeling that way.
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- megan schmidt
- 01-19-20
Important considerations for women in their 40s
Ada Calhoun narrates her text with efficiency and expertise. Her assertions are researched and creatively crafted. I’ve recommended to all women I know who have hit their 40s with a “what happened here?” mentality.
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- Christina Rordam
- 02-03-20
Finally someone sees the Gen X Woman
A refreshing and heartening read for the ladies of the so called slacker generation. 5 stars.
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- Nomad46
- 08-12-20
This booked nailed GenX middle aged malaise
As a single genXer who has worked hard my entire life, but is now unemployed due to a global pandemic, unable to find a job, middle aged, in peri menopause, having to leave my home next week because I can no longer afford rent, and generally not anywhere near where I expected to be at this age, this book is exactly what I needed!!! Thank you to the author for showing us we are not alone during this middle-aged malaise!
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- keri
- 02-16-20
More Anxiety but Less Alone
Author presented some very good stats as it relates to the reality of Gen X women. I could relate to all. However, sometimes instead of feeling comfort knowing I wasn't alone, I felt anxious!! Narrator read pretty quickly so it didn't help the building cloud of anxiety much. Overall, as hard as it was to hear... there's value in knowing. After all, Knowledge is Power.
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- Celine
- 06-23-20
Fantastic !
Technically I am just between Gen X and Millenials but never mind. My sisters in law are gen X, so are many of my coworkers, and this book was spot on. It was clever and relatable and well documented. It expressed things I only thought about confusely in a very clear manner. I love the author’s voice and style of reading too (perhaps a little too quick sometimes ) One of the best non fiction I’ve listened to, highly recommended.
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- Just-Jessie
- 12-05-22
Excellent!!
This is one of the most relatable books I’ve read about midlife in women. Highly recommend!!
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