All Our Hidden Gifts

hen Caroline O’Donoghue was 16, she met two awesome queer people in their 20s who changed her life forever. “It’s so cliche,” she groans over Zoom. “I was raised by queer people!” We’re both laughing, but the truth is that this friendship was glorious and transformative. “They were a couple and they were both bi. She had a gender-neutral name that she had changed [herself]. She shaved her head. He wore eye make-up every day. They were the most vivid people I had ever met.” Caroline played bass in their band. They taught her to take feminism seriously. They were warm, exciting and endlessly wise.