Squirrels go up in smoke

“We are doing A Midsummer Night’s Dream,” Charlie informed me when I asked what he was up to at school. “Excellent, Puck or Bottom?” I replied in the annoying dad way that only dads may joke.

“No, I’m second angry man,” he responded, with not a hint of a smile. “I walk in to see that Puck has given Bottom a donkey’s head, then I say ‘you look funnier than a squirrel driving a speedboat’ and then I say ‘burn’ and walk off stage.” I paused for a full five seconds. I used the time to furrow my brow to the degree required to match my ‘What?’ reply.

Squirrels, speedboats