Caboodle One
By Ter Atkins
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About this ebook
Caboodle One is a compilation of short stories.
Enjoy Your Stay is surreal and comic. Jason doesn't know where he is, or how he got there. That will have to wait though – a grease-stained sneer of a man is glaring at him.
Bound is action-led and satirical. What do you do when a man with extraordinary limbs asks you to break into a government-controlled secure facility?
No Moor is dark and twisted story. Buddy doesn't like Carl. Carl doesn't like Buddy. Nan doesn't like Mum. Mum doesn't like Nan. Dad is too afraid to express a preference. Jill's had enough of the lot of them. This is what happens when a family day out goes bad.
Holding Cells and Dragons is a funny and fantastical story. Dan has a problem when his friend, the one with the scales, is suspected of a crime. He hopes he won't have to arrest him. They don't have cuffs big enough.
Ter Atkins
Ter Atkins is a bipedal being, born during the era of Angel Delight and Smash. She started writing around the same time that the Village People were singing "YMCA".
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Book preview
Caboodle One - Ter Atkins
Contents
Enjoy Your Stay
Bound
No Moor
Holding Cells and Dragons
Author information
Enjoy Your Stay
Since the last thing I remembered was sipping good brandy in Sandine’s restaurant, I was surprised to find myself standing in the dimly lit foyer of a hotel.
‘Hello,’ I said, into the gloom, my voice rising on the second syllable and turning the greeting into a question.
‘Yeah?’ A man grunted from the shadows. He didn’t sound friendly. I backed away towards the main door. I turned when I got to it, my fingers reaching out for a handle that wasn’t there. My reflection in the murky glass looked ragged. I realised I felt ragged too, weak and slow. It turned out it was an automatic door, but even with my nose right up against it, it made no move to open. Seeing no other option, I made my way over to the source of the voice, and when I reached the far side of the foyer I could make out a lump of a man behind the desk. I couldn’t see him clearly, but I could smell him. He had the aroma of a part-used bottle of milk accidently left on the kitchen worktop for the duration of a fortnight’s holiday. I reached the desk and anchored myself against it, as if clinging to a listing ship.
The man turned away from me, towards the open door behind him. ‘Looks like we got a customer.’
He turned back to me. ‘Name?’ he asked.
‘Elliott. Jason Elliott. Are you expecting me?’ My knuckles were glowing white against the black ash of the reception desk.
The man glanced at a tatty ledger in front of him. He picked up a chewed biro and ticked off a name.
‘Oh yeah, we’ve got you booked in alright.’
He picked up a key from the array of hooks behind him and tossed it on to the desk top.
‘That’s yours.’
‘I’m not staying here,’ I said.
He laughed, mouth wide open, showing NHS fillings and empty gum pockets.
‘You ain’t got no choice, mate.’
I felt sweat beading on my already-clammy face.
The man turned back towards the doorway behind him.
‘This one’ll be needing a bit of assisting.’
The doorway was filled by a large man. His slightly larger partner followed him. They walked around the desk and stationed themselves on either side of me.
‘Look, I don’t want any trouble…I think there’s been a misunderstanding.’
One of the men picked up my room key from the desk.
‘Dunno about assisting, looks like he needs a stretcher,’ he said.
‘Shouldn’t give us much trouble then,’ replied the other.
I pushed myself away from the reception desk and made to back away. My reversal was stopped by two hairy arms grabbing mine. I struggled as hard as I could, but they simply lifted me off the ground. My legs flapped in the air like I was learning to swim. The men carried me away from the reception desk, towards a set of double doors. The man on my right pressed a button on the wall, then pushed one of the doors open. They threw me through the