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    Chicken Soup for the Soul: Thanks to My Mom: 101 Stories of Gratitude, Love, and Lessons
    Chicken Soup for the Soul: Thanks to My Mom: 101 Stories of Gratitude, Love, and Lessons
    Chicken Soup for the Soul: Thanks to My Mom: 101 Stories of Gratitude, Love, and Lessons
    Ebook465 pages6 hours

    Chicken Soup for the Soul: Thanks to My Mom: 101 Stories of Gratitude, Love, and Lessons

    By Amy Newmark

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    About this ebook

    A mother’s job is never done, but in Chicken Soup for the Soul: Thanks to My Mom, she gets the praise she deserves! Children of all ages share their words of thanks in these 101 stories of love, learning, and gratitude to the woman they couldn’t have done without!

    This new collection is filled with heartwarming and entertaining anecdotes by grateful children, all in praise of the woman who encourages them, supports them, and most importantly, loves them. These stories will brighten any mother’s day, and show her that the kids were paying attention after all.
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherChicken Soup for the Soul
    Release dateMar 17, 2015
    ISBN9781611592474
    Chicken Soup for the Soul: Thanks to My Mom: 101 Stories of Gratitude, Love, and Lessons
    Author

    Amy Newmark

    Amy Newmark is Publisher and Editor-in-Chief of Chicken Soup for the Soul.  

    Read more from Amy Newmark

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      Book preview

      Chicken Soup for the Soul - Amy Newmark

      Contents

      Introduction, Jo Dee Messina

      ~Great Role Models~

      1. The String that Binds Our Hearts, Jo Dee Messina

      2. Without Prejudice, Donna Finlay Savage

      3. A Last Request and a Lasting Lesson, Judith Lavori Keiser

      4. The Play’s the Thing, Maggie Anderson

      5. Fake It Till You Make It, Alisa Edwards Smith

      6. Selfie, Alison Gunn

      7. The Dangdest Thing, Jeanie Jacobson

      8. Mom’s Recipe for Life, Nancy Julien Kopp

      9. The Letter, Irena Nieslony

      10. Breaking Bed, Marge Gower

      11. Sailing Through the Storm, Pat Wahler

      12. The Cake Lady, Amy McCoy Dees

      ~Rising to the Challenge~

      13. A Strike at the Ballpark, Amy Newmark

      14. This Too Shall Pass, Connie K. Pombo

      15. They’re My Children, Susan DeWitt Wilder

      16. Under Control, Linda Fisher

      17. Roomies, Gail Molsbee Morris

      18. Looking Back, Clarissa Villaverde

      19. The Perfect Prom Dress, Marisa Bardach Ramel

      20. As Long as I’m Living… Thomas Schonhardt

      21. Mom Said No, Terrie Lynn Birney

      22. Underwear Model, Edie Schmidt

      23. Speak Up, Maria Calderon Sandoval

      24. Until One Day, M.G. Lane

      25. Safety Arms, Alana Patrick

      26. No Matter What, Tyler Stocks

      ~Maternal Mischief~

      27. Catastrophe, Jody Lebel

      28. Eating the Evidence, Eva Schlesinger

      29. The Mailman, Zachary Waterman

      30. Neither Snow, Nor Rain, Nor Gloom of Night, Kathy McGovern

      31. Mom’s Cuss Jar, Donna Duly Volkenannt

      32. The Bahamas Mammas, Judith Fitzsimmons

      33. My Mother’s Wig, Lorraine Mace

      34. Top-Priority Delivery, Rick Schafer

      ~Love and Acceptance~

      35. I Was So Wrong, Joe Ricker

      36. A Bowl of Soup, Heidi Gaul

      37. Nothing Wrong, Bobby Bermúdas

      38. My Mother’s Hands, Marya Morin

      39. An Ordinary Life, Suzanne M. Brazil

      40. The Cleaning Gene, Harriet Cooper

      41. Learning to Forgive, Darlene Carpenter Herring

      42. She Already Knew, Ayanna Bryce

      43. She Put Her Book Down, Dale G. Jackson

      44. Love in Four Panels, Karen Wilson

      45. A Miracle Mile Miracle, Diane Stark

      46. Cooking Up Love, Tyann Sheldon Rouw

      ~The Best Cheerleaders~

      47. Writing What You Know, Larry Miller

      48. Pilots and Princesses, Carol Henderson

      49. Letters from Home, Rachel Loewen

      50. A Book for Mama, Mary Beth Magee

      51. Mom’s Lawn Chair, Jill Haymaker

      52. Footprints in the Sand, Jennifer Lynn Clay

      53. Mom’s Dreams, Michael Strand

      54. The Sun, the Moon, and the Stars, Denise Drespling

      55. Finish It for Me, Maril Crabtree

      56. The Pie Chart of Me, Aileen Liang

      57. Doing Life with Mom, Diane Stark

      58. Just One More Chapter, Gail MacMillan

      59. The Courage to Wait, Dayna E. Mazzuca

      ~The Wisdom of Mothers~

      60. Confessions of a Latchkey Kid, Mark Leiren-Young

      61. Tell Them You Can Do It, Mary Wood Bridgman

      62. Be Nice, Michelle A. Watkins

      63. Never Too Busy, John P. Buentello

      64. Gotcha! Eva Carter

      65. The Absence of Fear, Brenda Watterson

      66. Mom’s Old, Useless Bible, Joseph B. Walker

      67. On Solid Ground, Susan Blakeney

      68. I’ll Be Right There, Katie Bangert

      69. The Memory Box, Diana Creel Elarde

      70. A Heart Like Hers, Logan Eliasen

      ~Mom Was Right~

      71. A 100 Percent Chance of Mom, Kathy Lynn Harris

      72. Reclaiming My Sparkle, Christy Heitger-Ewing

      73. Stand Tall and Proud, Susan R. Ray

      74. Grumbling in the Garden, Lori Zenker

      75. Tough Love, Pam Carter

      76. Advice Worth Trying, Rita Durrett

      77. Dorothy and Sophia, Kyle Therese Cranston

      78. The Meanest Mother in Town, Carol Commons-Brosowske

      79. In Gratitude, Raymond M. Wong

      80. Birthday Blues, Sarah McCrobie

      81. Always Show Up, R’becca Groff

      ~My Mother the Teacher~

      82. My First Teacher, Bill Jager

      83. Back to the Bank, Elizabeth Greenhill

      84. Modeling Change, Lorri Danzig

      85. Honest Love, Gretchen Bassier

      86. The Love of Cooking, Dorann Weber

      87. For the Love of Learning, CF Sherrow

      88. A Teachable Moment, Jennifer Clark Vihel

      89. Yahtzee Queen, Linda Lohman

      90. The Wisest Woman in the World, Gail MacMillan

      91. Happy Feet, Georgia A. Hubley

      92. A Love of Words, Michelle Shocklee

      ~The Other Moms in Our Lives~

      93. Thanks to My Nine Moms, Johnny Tan

      94. Last Duet, Chris Rainer

      95. Quadruple Love, Stephanie Jackson

      96. Becoming a Daughter, Jenni K. Worley

      97. Just Is a Four-Letter Word, Lynne Leite

      98. Second Mother, Annette Gulati

      99. Eva, Garrett Bauman

      100. Joined at the Heart, June Harman Betts

      101. Just Ask, Carol Hatcher

      Meet Our Contributors

      Meet Amy Newmark

      Meet Jo Dee Messina

      Thank You

      About Chicken Soup for the Soul

      Changing lives one story at a time™

      www.chickensoup.com

      Introduction

      Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.

      ~Melody Beattie

      There is a fifteen-year age difference between my oldest sibling and myself. If you asked the four of us kids to describe our mother, who she was, and what she was like, I bet you would get four totally different answers. My mother was twenty-five and a newlywed when she had my eldest sister. By the time I came along she was forty with three other children. Her marriage was not that new and exciting by then, and in fact she would be divorced within five years. She also didn’t have the energy that she did as a twenty-five-year-old when her first child was born.

      So I had a very different mother than any of my siblings. She made her mark on each of us in a very positive way, but for each of us it was a different experience. And that’s what I got from this collection of great stories as well—101 different experiences. There are many different kinds of Moms, many different ways to be a mom and still be the perfect mom for your children.

      Many of us have a preconceived notion of just what it is a mom should be: a teacher, a caregiver, a shoulder to cry on, a font of all wisdom? Is a mom a Clair Huxtable or a Carol Brady? A Lorelai Gilmore or a Claire Dunphy? They all have it going on. I think what we look for in a mother is defined by our own experiences. And that is what made putting this volume together so fascinating… and fun. My coauthor Amy Newmark and I got to choose from thousands of stories that were submitted for this book. We left a lot of great stories by the wayside, but we are confident that the ones we chose represent all the different types of mothers out there. The unifying factors that we saw in these stories about terrific moms were their selfless love, their passionate interest in their children’s dreams and lives, and their lifelong commitment to their kids, even if they were juggling other children, jobs, volunteer work, husbands, and housework.

      Being a mom myself, I put massive pressure on myself to be perfect with my children. Is that even possible? These stories opened my eyes to the reality that what is important to each of us is different. But whatever our priorities, our kids appreciate what we choose to do for them. As a mother of very young children, looking ahead to many more years of hard work, I found it encouraging to read about how much children appreciate the sacrifices their mothers made for them.

      You need appreciation when you are a mother! And that’s the key here. This book is a gigantic Thank You to all the moms out there. It’s your way to say thank you to your own special mother who poured her heart and all her effort into making you who are today. To all the moms out there who are reading this, who have been there, done that, you are appreciated. You’ll get that when you read these stories and you see the outpouring of love and thanks from our writers.

      In Chapter 1—Great Role Models—you’ll read about my mom and what she taught me, and you’ll also read about the great examples that other moms set for their children. Donna Finlay Savage, for example, describes how her mom bravely taught her kids to live without prejudice in the South during the early days of the civil rights movement. And Alisa Edwards Smith tells us how her mom taught her to fake it till you make it, something we all sometimes need to do when we are not feeling quite confident enough about a new challenge or opportunity.

      Moms can be incredibly strong, and in Chapter 2—Rising to the Challenge—you’ll meet some very impressive moms who handle all kinds of situations with great aplomb. Amy talks about her mom’s stroke and how she bravely and diligently recovered from it, returning to her normal active life. And Connie Pombo used her mom’s own example fighting cancer to handle her own breast cancer when she was diagnosed.

      Amy and I decided to look at the lighter side of life in Chapter 3—Maternal Mischief. After all, our mothers can be a hoot! You’ll read about how Jody Lebel’s mom crept into a tattoo parlor to see if they could get Sharpie cat whiskers off her face, and how Eva Schlesinger and her mom inadvertently snuck contraband fruit into the U.S. and then had to scarf down the evidence right in front of a Customs agent.

      We all want our moms to be proud of us, even when we’re adults. In Chapter 4—Love and Acceptance—you’ll meet moms who surprised their own kids by being more open-minded and loving than they ever imagined, whether their kids were coming out to them, being obnoxious teenagers, or just being unappreciative. And you’ll read Joe Ricker’s story about how he never understood how much his teen mother loved him until she showed him her cache of artwork and letters after he rebelliously eloped.

      Chapter 5—The Best Cheerleaders—reminds us who’s really there for us at all times no matter what. It’s our moms, who are always willing to share our dreams and help us make them come true. Larry Miller, a successful journalist, tells us how his mother steered him on the right course to his writing success by telling him to write about what he knew. And Maril Crabtree ends up finishing every project she ever starts, including a thesis and a law degree, because of her mom’s wise motivational words.

      Harriet Beecher Stowe, a New England girl like myself, said, Most mothers are instinctive philosophers. And that’s why we made Chapter 6—The Wisdom of Mothers—to pass on some great advice and sage thinking. Mark Leiren-Young talks about how his mom did nothing wrong and everything right when she raised him as a latchkey kid. He learned all about responsibility, discipline, and even how to cook. Since my mom raised me the same way, I loved Mark’s story.

      Did your mom ever fiercely defend you or stand up for your rights? Amy and I both have stories about our moms doing that, so we loved the stories in Chapter 7—Mom Was Right. Even when Kathy Lynn Harris’s mother embarrassed her by not letting her go on a sports team trip when the roads were icy, she knew she was right. And how about all those things that your mom insisted on when you were a kid that you swore you would never do to your own kids… except that now you are! You’ll love Carol Commons-Brosowske’s story about having the meanest mother in town, one she emulates now that she is a mother herself!

      Teaching our kids is one of the most important things that we do, and various grown children thank their mothers for that in Chapter 8—My Mother the Teacher. Bill Jager tells a fascinating story about how his mom was his kindergarten teacher in his rural town, where school didn’t start till the first grade. And we loved Elizabeth Greenhill’s story about how her mom made the family go back to the bank to return money the teller had given her in error. It was a great lesson for Elizabeth and her siblings.

      As I read through these stories, I realized mom is defined in myriad ways. Some people consider their mom to be a person who isn’t even biologically or adoptively connected to them, but who still served the mother role. Johnny Tan talks about the nine mothers he has had throughout his life—yes, nine—in Chapter 9, The Other Moms in Our Lives. And Chris Rainer talks about how she came to love and rely on her stepmother, regretting how she had not embraced her when she first came into her life.

      You know, we women tend to be self-deprecating. We wonder if we are enough. I wrote a song about this a couple of years ago. It’s called Me. My sons look at me and they see the world. I look at them and see the same! But sometimes, when you are a mom, and your kids are relying on you, or they are grown and you wonder how you did, you can feel a bit like an imposter. You might think, Hey, it’s just little old me. Who am I to think that I can do this mothering thing? That’s what my song is about. One of the lines—When I look in the mirror all I see is me—pretty much sums it up. But it’s clear from reading these stories that it will all work out. We moms rock! And we are enough. So I say thanks to my mom and thanks to all you moms reading this special volume. I hope it will make you smile, laugh out loud, and even tear up a few times. And overall, I hope it makes you feel loved and appreciated, because you clearly are!

      ~Jo Dee Messina

      ME

      I’M SOMEBODY’S DAUGHTER

      SOMEBODY’S FRIEND

      A SHOULDER TO LEAN ON

      NO MATTER WHEN

      I’M SOMEBODY’S TEACHER

      WHEN THEY DON’T UNDERSTAND

      GOT A SEAT IN THE BLEACHERS

      I’M THE WORLD’S BIGGEST FAN

      OH WELL

      I WISH I WAS HALF THE WOMAN I’VE GOT TO BE

      I WISH I HAD ALL THE ANSWERS RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME

      I’M EVERYTHING TO EVERYONE AND I’M SCARED AS I CAN BE

      BECAUSE WHEN I LOOK INTO THE MIRROR ALL I SEE IS ME

      I’M SOMEBODY’S SWEETHEART

      SOMEBODY’S GIRL

      SOMEONE’S DIRECTION TO FIND THEIR WAY IN THIS WORLD

      I’VE GOT TO BE PERFECT

      EVEN WHEN I FEEL BAD

      I’VE GOT TO KEEP GIVING

      WHEN I’VE GAVE ALL I HAD

      OH

      CHORUS

      WHEN I FEEL UNCERTAIN

      I’M ON MY KNEES TO PRAY

      I KNOW THAT IT’S ALL WORTH IT

      BUT AT THE END OF THE DAY

      CHORUS

      IS SOMEBODY’S DAUGHTER

      SOMEBODY’S GIRL

      SOMEONE’S DIRECTION TO FIND THEIR WAY IN THIS WORLD

      Words and Music by Jo Dee Messina, Kathie Baillie and Patricia Conroy © 2013 Dreambound Songs (ASCAP), Whole Earth Music (ASCAP) and Patricia Conroy Music (ASCAP)

      All Rights Reserved. Used By Permission. International Copyright Secured.

      Use this link for Jo Dee’s performance of Me www.jodeemessina.com/chickensoup

      Great Role Models

      The String that Binds Our Hearts

      Even when tied in a thousand knots, the string is still but one.

      ~Rumi

      I still remember it vividly. It was my first day of kindergarten and I didn’t want to go in. My mother and I pulled up in front of the school and parked along the curb, behind the big yellow busses. No matter how my mom tried to calm my nerves, it wasn’t working. I didn’t want to get out of the car. I didn’t want to go inside and leave her. I just wanted to go back home and spend the day around the house with my mother.

      As I cried, my mother told me the magical truth that has carried me through many a challenge. You can go into school because I will be with you, she said. I asked her how that could be. There is this string that goes around my heart and ties around yours. No matter where you go or what you do, the string will always be there connecting us. That calmed me down, and after a bit of coaxing, I finally made it inside for my first day of school.

      My mother’s wisdom and advice have helped me through many a challenge. And my mother has been a great role model for me. My parents divorced when I was about five, so for much of my childhood I watched my mother do the job of two parents. My two eldest siblings were on their own by the time I was eight so my mother had to raise my brother and me on her own. When I was growing up, I remember my mother always showing the ultimate strength. She also displayed discipline and dignity in all that she did, no matter how stressed she was about time or money. Never leave the house without lipstick on, she’d advise. Make sure you run a brush through your hair. She would get dressed for work every day and don a scarf or big pearl necklace (fake, of course). She had quite the collection of clip-on earrings and always looked and acted like a lady.

      Mom was the ultimate multitasker, too. When I was a kid, she would take me to work with her at the answering service where she was a switchboard operator. I would sit in the window of the office looking at the Brigham’s ice cream shop across the street. Sometimes I sat at a board that wasn’t in use and pretended to answer phones while she manned the real phone lines, taking messages for doctors, contractors, and whoever else needed an answering service. She always made sure we went across the street for ice cream at some point.

      My mother always strived to be the best she could be and that meant that even as she was raising two young kids, she was bettering herself. She was over forty when she went back to school to get her psychology degree. Back then, you could leave kids on their own, so she would bring my brother and me along at times to play in the library or on the campus grounds while she was in class.

      My mother didn’t earn a lot but she somehow managed to save all year to take my brother and me on vacation for one whole week. It was usually a place close to home like New Hampshire so we could get there by car. She made so many sacrifices so we could have what we needed. When I was little, I never remember her buying clothes for herself—just clothes for my brother and me.

      Mom gave so much of her time to us, too. When I began singing, I was too young to drive so my mother drove me to shows, staying up well past one, only to get up for work before six in the morning and drag her bones through the next day. She was always selfless, always giving everything she could to us.

      When I got older, I wanted to chase my dreams of a music career. After finishing high school I decided I should go for it. I packed my car full of everything I owned and set off on the 1,100-mile drive to Nashville, Tennessee. My mother, always the giver, handed me some money she had saved to get me started on my new career. As she saw me off, I said, Mom, it’s going to kill me being so far away from you. She responded with that magical string story again: Remember, there is a string that goes between your heart and mine. I am always with you. Even when you think you’re far away. Our hearts are joined together, always.

      Fast-forward about six years and my mother had sold our family home in Massachusetts and moved to Nashville so I could take care of her. Her sister moved in with her in a little house I got for them outside Nashville. But then I signed my record deal and began touring extensively. I was rarely home. My mother was getting older and I worried about her. We were in the kitchen talking one day as I was getting ready to leave for another run, and I voiced one of my biggest fears: Mom, what if something happens to you while I’m on the road?

      She calmly responded, If that happens, stay out there and do your thing.

      What?! I exclaimed.

      She smiled and said, That little string that goes between your heart and mine can’t be broken by anything. By distance, time or even death. I will always be with you. As my eyes got teary she went on to say, Besides, you can’t come home. I won’t be here. I’ll be out there, waiting for you to go on stage. Then she giggled.

      The string story has resurfaced whenever I needed it. When my mother had to undergo heart surgery in 2013, she had many complications. There were times my mother would be unconscious for days, even weeks. When she was awake, she was lost and confused. I learned more about medicine, the human body, doctors, hospitals, and medical protocol than I ever wanted to know.

      I struggled with this new challenge. What could I do for her in such a helpless state? How was she feeling? Was she even aware of what she was going through? The woman who was my rock and my strength for my entire life was being kept alive by medicine and machines. My world, my soul, was rocked to the core time and time again, with every complication, every procedure, and every decision that had to be made. This went on for months. There were nights when I would stay with my mother at the hospital and climb into bed with her. I’d pretend she was simply asleep and I was a little kid cuddling up beside her just like I had as a child. At times, it seemed like that little string she always told me about had become a lifeline that kept me from losing it completely.

      My children are not quite ready to learn about the string that binds our hearts. They are two and five. But, I will tell them about that magical string one day soon, so that when I have to travel for work or when they go off to camp or to college, they will know. They’ll know that the string that binds my heart to their grandmother’s also binds theirs to mine. I hope it will mean as much to them as it does to me. That string connects us. It can’t be broken by anything. Not distance, not time away, not even death. The string has made me stronger. I will pass it on, with love, to give my sons the strength to make it through whatever life brings their way, too.

      ~Jo Dee Messina

      Without Prejudice

      When you teach your son, you teach your son’s son.

      ~The Talmud

      If my mom had followed the pattern of her mother and grandmother, she probably would have been a racist. A kind and loving racist with gracious manners and Southern hospitality, but a racist nonetheless. And I might have been a racist too.

      My mom experienced the typical racial prejudice and segregated lifestyle of white families in Jackson, Mississippi long before that segregation was portrayed in the book and movie, The Help. She found the same culture of segregation and discrimination when she moved to Louisiana in her early teens. But at some point on the road to adulthood, my mom decided not to share that culture with her children.

      Though few black families lived in our Houston neighborhood in the 1960s, my mom was determined to help her girls embrace racial equality. When Alabama’s governor tried to prevent the desegregation of the state’s public schools in 1963 and state troopers were called to block elementary school doorways, my mom grabbed our hands and lined us up in front of the family television to watch the grainy, black and white images. Mom cried as black children were turned away, clinging to their parents’ hands. My sisters and I were young—just three, five and seven. We were far too young to understand the issues and emotions behind Mom’s tears or the battle over integration. But our age didn’t matter to Mom. She wanted us to share the history-making moment with her.

      Mom followed the news of the civil rights movement and talked about it at the dinner table. When Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. was jailed in Birmingham in 1963, my mom sent him a letter. She didn’t know Dr. King, but she wanted to assure him of her prayers. He was changing the world her girls would live in.

      On those weekends when we visited my mom’s dad and step-mom, stepping back into the world of white prejudice, Mom showed us how to respect her dad’s black employees. My grandfather may have called the lawn man boy, but my mom introduced him to us as Mr. William. She took time to visit with Mr. William during each visit and ask about his family. She taught us the same respect for the women who cooked and cleaned at my grandparents’ house.

      Once my youngest sister started school, Mom put feet to our dinner table discussions about racial discrimination. She began volunteering once a week at a Baptist ministry center in one of Houston’s poorest neighborhoods. There she talked with young black and Hispanic moms who came for sewing classes and food distributions. She cuddled their babies and joked with their children. And she encouraged us to volunteer with her during school breaks once we were old enough.

      As I approached ninth grade, Houston’s school district was pressured to rezone the schools to speed up integration. I wasn’t excited about switching to a new school—a school four miles farther from my home—or the prospect of leaving my friends behind. For weeks after school started, I came home with stories about knifings and fights between black and white students. I worried that I might get caught in the middle of one of those fights. But my mom encouraged me to plow through fear and discomfort, keep the big goal in sight, and make new friends with students of other races.

      Mom’s lessons stuck. Today my husband pastors a multi-ethnic church congregation in Nevada. If you scan the crowd on a Sunday morning, you’ll see people from almost a dozen ethnic heritages. Funny, but I rarely notice the diversity until a newcomer or friend comments on it.

      I think my mom notices the diversity though. When she visits our church, she smiles at the rainbow of races. After the worship service is over, Mom shakes hands and greets people without any hint of prejudice. I see her joy as she talks to my wide array of friends, and I know she is pleased. This is the life Mom always had in mind for her girls.

      ~Donna Finlay Savage

      A Last Request and a Lasting Lesson

      When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.

      ~Kahlil Gibran

      My mom died just before dawn on a miserably cold and rainy December morning. The dark clouds and constant drizzle over her Cape Cod neighborhood fit our somber moods as my brothers and sisters and I arranged with the local funeral home for Mom’s last departure from her beloved house on the edge of the tidal marsh.

      All five of us were there, having been alerted earlier that week. As soon as we had gotten The Call, we had immediately flown or driven from our homes in California, Florida, Georgia and New York to the house on the marsh. We had left behind our sympathetic spouses, needy children, pending projects and full schedules. My husband bravely took over for me to support our nine-year-old son, who was nervously anticipating his first school-wide Geography Bee that week. In spite of their shared anxiety about the upcoming Bee, both of them understood that I needed to be with my mother and my brothers and sisters. They didn’t want me to worry about them, because I had more important things to worry about.

      As I joined my brothers and sisters at the house on the Cape, I felt oddly peaceful. Though I dreaded losing my mother, I wasn’t anxious about the process. I knew that Mom had prepared well for her death. All we had to do was be present for her and each other during this final stage. She had done everything else.

      Mom was a born teacher and a natural organizer. When she had received the diagnosis of incurable cancer that September, she had planned her death as pragmatically as she had planned her busy life as wife, mother and professional. She had asked all five of us to take turns being alone with her at the Cape

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