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    Never Let Go
    Never Let Go
    Never Let Go
    Ebook113 pages1 hour

    Never Let Go

    By Rachael Pepin

    ()

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    About this ebook

    Some say that our fate is determined before we are ever born. Jacqui has felt the impact of her fate her entire life. Branded as the killer of her twina little girl they named Janeshe has been a pariah in her own family and community since birth. As the result of a freak accident in the womb, Jane never drew a single breath. Her unborn twins foot crushed her cord, depriving her tiny brain of oxygen. No reasonable person would assign intent or blame to the surviving babybut that didnt stop Jacquis parents from blaming her for her sisters demise.

    Jacqui has tried to come to a place of peace and understanding her entire life, but she is now treated as a burden by her family. Alone, sad, and confused, she tells her story through a series of poignant letters to her sister in heaven. Having started writing to Jane when she was about seven, she is desperate to connect with her lost other half in any way she can.

    In her quest for self-acceptance, understanding, and forgiveness, Jacqui reaches out to the only other one who could possibly know what really happened on that fateful day: her lost twin.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherBalboa Press AU
    Release dateFeb 27, 2014
    ISBN9781452513386
    Never Let Go
    Author

    Rachael Pepin

    Rachael Pepin grew up in a small seaside town in Australia and has always wanted to be a writer. She lives with her dog, who is jealous of both her computer and her pen.

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      Book preview

      Never Let Go - Rachael Pepin

      Copyright © 2014 Rachael Pepin.

      All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

      Balboa Press books may be ordered through booksellers or by contacting:

      Balboa Press

      A Division of Hay House

      1663 Liberty Drive

      Bloomington, IN 47403

      www.balboapress.com.au

      1 (877) 407-4847

      Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

      The author of this book does not dispense medical advice or prescribe the use of any technique as a form of treatment for physical, emotional, or medical problems without the advice of a physician, either directly or indirectly. The intent of the author is only to offer information of a general nature to help you in your quest for emotional and spiritual well-being. In the event you use any of the information in this book for yourself, which is your constitutional right, the author and the publisher assume no responsibility for your actions.

      Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

      Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

      ISBN: 978-1-4525-1337-9 (sc)

      ISBN: 978-1-4525-1338-6 (e)

      Balboa Press rev. date: 2/22/2014

      Contents

      Epilogue

      Part One

      Part Two

      Part Three

      Epilogue

      Authors Note

      To Kerry for believing in me more than I ever could in myself

      To Mary for never giving up

      To Alison for reminding me how to laugh

      To Pranav for teaching me what it means to be a friend

      To My Mum, Jane, for never letting go and for

      inspiring me with hope.

      To the rest of my friends and family for allowing me to be overly

      dramatic which allowed for this book to be written.

      Epilogue

      There’s something wrong I’m afraid Dr Calamity said. It would seem that the larger of your twins has pressed their foot against the others cord and the oxygen supply was cut. I’m so terribly sorry but one of your babies will be a stillborn.

      No… No… No please not my baby… please Dr save her Janice cried.

      I’m sorry there’s nothing I can do.shes gone. Dr Calamity said quietly.

      25 years later…

      I guess I was a wanted baby to start with… but then I killed my sister- my twin to be exact. My parents have hated me ever since. They worship my big brother but they can’t even look at me. The thing is if they bothered to look at me they would see how bad things really are… they would see how bad I really am. I wish everyday my twin was alive but she isn’t so I guess that’s how this got started. I write letters to my twin –Jane her name was. I guessmy parents thought twins with matching J names were cute because they called me Jacqui. Sometimes I feel my twin would be the only one who would understand me. That’s why I got started writing her letters. I was about seven the first time I wrote to Jane and now I have a whole collection of letters just for her. This is my story told through my letters to Jane.

      Part One

      01.jpg

      Dear Jane,

      Mummy and Daddy tell me about you all the time. They said I killed you. Is that true? Do you blame me? I hear heaven is really nice. I wish I was in heaven or that I could come be with you there. Apparently I’m not allowed though. Mummy tells me only good, non - murdering little girls get to go there. I’m 7 and already a criminal. I’m sorry Jane that you can’t be here to play with me and John. You would love our big brother. Everyone else does so I figure there must be something pretty special about him.

      I don’t think anybody loves me Jane. I’m pretty sure they would have loved you. They tell me twins look the same and that’s what we were so I’m sorry you probably look like me. But I think you would have been smart and loved Jane. Do you like it there in heaven? Is it sunny? I hope your happy Jane but I wish you could come and visit. I don’t understand why you are there and not here with us. I just hope you’re happy. Mummy is yelling again so I need to run. I Hope you can get letters in heaven.

      Love Jacqui.

      02.jpg01.jpg

      Dear Jane,

      Is heaven far away? Mummy and Daddy told me they are having another baby. I asked why we needed another baby. Why can’t we just go get Jane I asked them. Daddy slapped me and mummy started screaming that I’m evil and that I’m not going anywhere near her new baby because I killed you Jane and she says I’m not going to hurt another of her babies.

      Did it hurt Jane? I’m sorry if it did. I didn’t know I was hurting you. Or that I was going to send you to heaven. Sometimes I think I remember you Jane. Its like I know you but that can’t really be possible can it? Of course it’s not possible. I really wish you would come back from heaven. It

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