TransAtlantic Ties

This book is a work of fiction. Characters, places, incidents, and dialogue are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously.

Copyright © 2021 by Katherine Girsch.

All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

Published by Katherine Girsch

Salem, Oregon

United States of America

Cover Design: Bill Girsch

ISBN 978-0-57879-173-9

eBook 978-0-57879-174-6

Library of Congress Control Number: 2020921248

In memory of life on earth before 2020 and with hope for our future.

Contents

LONDON INTERLUDE

A TALK ABOUT LIFE

DOING MAM PROUD

CITY GIRL

THANKSGIVING STORY

FOLLOW YOUR HEART

BEST FRIENDS, INTERRUPTED

WE’RE GOING TO BE FINE

A PRECIOUS SEASON

BEAUTIFUL GIRL

STANDING ON THE THRESHOLD

BRAVE NEW WORLD

BEING BROTHERS

MOTHER NATURE’S SON

ORDINARY PEOPLE

FAMILY TIES

LAST WORDS

PIECES OF MY LIFE

FOUR MINUTES—IF YOU PLAY IT TWICE

WAY BETTER THAN SLEEPING

THE MORE WE GIVE . . .

SECRETS

RELEARNING THE PAST

STARTING OVER

Love & Thanks

LONDON INTERLUDE

2008

September was a romantic low point for me. At the beginning of the month, I told Sarah, the woman I’d been seeing for eight weeks, that I wasn’t ready for a committed relationship. An outright lie. Five years after a divorce had broken my heart, I was more than ready to commit again, just not with Sarah. As time passed, I seemed to make ever worse choices as I searched for a partner.

My friend Jack offered an opinion. You’re looking for the anti-Kate. That’s a mistake. Even though your marriage to her didn’t work out, she was in many ways your ideal woman—warm, kind, oblivious of her beauty. You’re a Shakespeare-quoting sheep farmer turned Oxford scholar turned crusader for social justice. He paused for a breath, then continued holding forth. You’re quirky, for Christ’s sake. Look for a woman who appreciates your eccentricity, who doesn’t spend an hour in front of a mirror every morning and the rest of the day keeping score. Someone you can take up north to meet your family. These designer blondes you insist on seeing, however talented they may be, are not going to cut it.

Jack had a point, but I hadn’t asked for his advice and was in no mood to take it. I do want a woman who’ll feel comfortable in Yorkshire. But who are you to give relationship advice? You’re hardly a shining success. And what the hell is a ‘designer blonde’?

He refused to elaborate. Don’t pretend the aptness of that construction escapes you. You took bloody first-class honours in English Language and Literature. You’ve explicated far more obscure phrases.

I filed the term away in the back of my mind under the heading, Jack Being Jack, and threw myself into my work. Spent a month organizing a symposium of voices from within the immigrant community to address challenges they faced in London. The press showed up on the morning of the conference. The men and women who spoke shared inspiring stories of courage and hope in the face of adversity. I was proud of them. Of myself.

But by the time I left South Kensington Station that afternoon, the warmth of my colleagues’ praise had faded, and loneliness competed with my feeling of pride in the forum I’d put together. Peals of laughter spilled out onto the street through the open door of a hotel bar. I decided to drop in for a whiskey, maybe two, before heading to my silent flat.

I stepped from the glare of late afternoon sun into a cool dim space, and there she sat, a happy-looking woman in a light grey jacket and skinny black trousers—her hair all rippling, honey-colored waves—raising a champagne flute in a solitary toast. I crossed the room. Here I go, another blonde. Took a seat next to her and signaled the barman. Jameson on the rocks.

Within minutes, I discovered the woman was an American widow toasting her husband and son, who’d died in an automobile accident. Not at all happy. My parents-in-law held a celebration of life for the two of them last October. I could neither celebrate nor grieve. I didn’t talk about either of them, not a word, for almost a year. Does that make me sound heartless?

No, I don’t think so. Would you like to talk about them now?

Yes. She stared over my head, across the room. My husband was a wonderful human being—joyful and calm and fearless—a kind of philosopher-scientist. And a nature lover. He and our son spent hours crawling on their hands and knees searching for life, in fields and woods and even—a laugh bubbled up between her words—in the cracks of Brooklyn’s sidewalks.

A second later, tears filled her eyes. Their last outing was to the family truck farm in the Finger Lakes of New York. One year ago today, my son called me from the car as they drove home to Brooklyn and told me about the pumpkins he’d picked for Halloween. I never heard his voice again. She wiped her cheeks with the back of her hand. It’s your turn to talk. Tell me about your family, your life.

I grew up in the country, the Dales. My mum’s a psychotherapist, and my dad’s a literature teacher. My granddad was a shepherd. Psychology never captured me, but Shakespeare and sheep were in my blood, and I underwent a great internal tug of war before I finally abandoned my dream of farming and began reading literature at Oxford. As it happened, my struggle wasn’t over. The cultural divide between North and South was wider than a Yorkshire farm boy could fathom. She listened—eyes fastened on me—as if hungry for every word. Fortunately, I met Jack, quite a sophisticated London bloke, on the day I came up and he saw me through my rocky introduction to the politics of class. The two of us have been mates for over twenty years.

She gave an enthusiastic nod. Oh yeah, I get that. Literature is in my DNA as well. The poetry of Shakespeare and Yeats above all. I grew up savoring their words in the Finger Lakes. At eighteen, I left home to study in New York City. The bus trip lasted just over six hours but carried me to a whole new realm. I was lost until I met Laura, a girl from the Bronx, who introduced me to that brave new world. Sixteen years have passed, and we’re still friends.

I ordered us each another drink. We sat there in the bar exchanging alcohol-fueled stories for two hours. I silently congratulated myself on raising her spirits until one glass of wine too many for her and a request from me, Tell me about the rest of your family—mum, dad, siblings, led to a confession.

Years before losing her husband and son, she’d lost her father, her mother, and her brother. My little brother, who was going to be my friend forever. I tempted fate by naming my baby for him. I wanted him to become a man along with my son. The look on her face was as sad as any I’d ever seen. But my son died when he was only five. Her voice cracked. Everyone I love, everyone who loves me, dies. What kind of person does that happen to? What kind of person am I? She ran outside and vomited.

Limp and tear-soaked, she walked with me to my flat. I handed her a towel and a pair of pajamas. You should have a shower. She nodded. Ten minutes later, I tucked her up in my bed, folded the clothes she’d strewn about the bathroom, and pulled out the sofa for myself. However besotted I’d become over the course of the evening, I was not about to sleep with an inebriated, grieving widow.

The next morning, she walked into the kitchen dressed in her rumpled shirt and trousers. Looked me straight in the eye. I am so embarrassed by my behavior, I hardly know what to say. As you probably surmised, I’m not much of a drinker. I can’t even remember how I ended up in your flat. She paused and there was a catch in her voice. We didn’t sleep together, did we?

Right, we didn’t. I slept in the living room. I took a mug from the cupboard and reached for the carafe. You could use a coffee.

No, no. She was adamant. I’ve already stayed too long. Thank you though. So much. As I said, my memory of last night is limited, but I do remember you were kind. You listened. You offered me your bed. She pressed her lips together. God, I must have been pathetic.

Not a bit of it. Apart from being sick quite close to a couple of front doorways, your behavior was impeccable.

She scoffed and walked down the entry hall. I truly apologize for causing such an inconvenience. She took her jacket from the peg, sniffed it and shook her head in distaste. I recall getting off the tube at South Kensington Station yesterday. Is it nearby?

It is. Out the door to the left and left again at the corner. Then straight ahead. You’ll see it.

She put on her jacket and gave a little wave. She was about to walk out of my life. I couldn’t let that happen. I’d like your phone number. In case you’ve left something behind.

She didn’t hesitate. Oh, yeah. It’s a U.S. number, 718-632-1824.

I pulled out my phone. Would you repeat that? A bit more slowly?

Sure.

A minute later, she stepped out into the bright Saturday morning wearing her vomit-stained jacket. She was a lovely mystery. I didn’t know what had brought her to London or how long she’d be staying. I watched her walk away. Her sleep-tousled hair bounced and glinted in the sun as she nodded at passing strangers. She reached the corner. Turned left and disappeared. I looked at her number in my contacts and laughed. We hadn’t even exchanged names. We’ll have to introduce ourselves when I call her this afternoon. We can make a plan to talk together without alcoholic enhancement. I think I’ll invite her up north to meet my family. I had a lot to learn about her. But I was certain of one thing—she wasn’t a designer blonde.

A TALK ABOUT LIFE

1945

Morning sun splashed the furnishings of Nell O’Neal’s Brooklyn bedroom—an iron bed with a white coverlet, a maple blanket chest, and a black Singer sewing machine adorned with gold acanthus leaves. Against one wall, on a chest of drawers painted pale green, three photos formed a small altar. At its center in a tarnished frame, was a sepia-toned portrait of Nell, a slender bride whose light hair was crowned with a wreath of lily of the valley, standing beside Emmet, her handsome, dark-haired groom. Hand-colored photos of their two sons flanked the portrait—one, a decade old, of Johnny in Dublin, and the other of Jimmy, taken two years ago in a Brooklyn studio.

She walked across the room and contemplated the faces on the photos. Each boy’s, her husband’s, and finally her own, the face of an eighteen-year-old standing on the brink of her life to come, bursting with a joy she’d feared she might never feel.

The year she was thirteen, Nell had spent the entire summer in bed with rheumatic fever. She would gaze with envy at her sister Nora’s dimples and dark ringlets, her dancing energy. Their mother’s words of sympathy, Poor, sweet child, such a thin face and nary a wave in your hair, made Nell feel pitiful, and Mam’s feeble attempt at optimism, It’s a blessing your fingers are nimble. You’ll make a good wife one day, only exacerbated her melancholy. She gradually recovered her strength but continued to lament her thin face and limp hair.

It wasn’t until she was seventeen that she came to believe straight, pale red hair and a slender face could be beautiful. Emmet O’Neal showed her the print of an Italian Madonna hanging in his mam’s bedroom.You see, Nell, she looks like you. He bought her a green hair ribbon. Tie it on, he said. It matches your eyes.

Her mam was hopeful for the first time in years. That O’Neal boy has brought something out in our girl. She’s got a spring in her step and a bit of color showing in her cheek.

Now a widow of thirty-eight, Nell carried herself with dignity. Emmet had died in the Dublin bombing of 1941, and the next year she sailed from Ireland to New York with their two sons. Her mother had been correct about the deftness of her hands. She quickly became known as the finest seamstress in her Brooklyn neighborhood, able to fashion everything from sturdy snowsuits to exquisite wedding gowns, and had built up a nest egg over the past three years.

She was a confident woman, comfortable in her own skin, but the physical residue of rheumatic fever hung on, extracting a toll on her heart. She’d confronted many a challenge in her life, but today’s task—preparing her son Johnny to parent his brother—filled her with trepidation.

Nell folded and refolded the fabric lying across a table, rearranged the contents of a small wooden sewing basket, and straightened the doily on the back of a burgundy mohair chair. Each action unnecessary. She was fidgeting. She glanced at the clock. Almost nine. Johnny’s shift will be ending. Four loud knocks cracked the stillness. That will be Jimmy. Not yet five years, but he knows to respect a closed door.

She opened it and looked down at her son—his dark curls sleep-tangled, his blue eyes bright with anticipation for whatever the day might offer. He was the picture of Emmet, the father he’d never met. Both her boys were. Mam, I slept long, didn’t I?

You did. And you’re all dressed and ready for breakfast, aren’t you?

No. I’m all ready for Johnny. He took her hand and led her downstairs to the kitchen. I ate cereal, and I washed my bowl and glass.

Darling, when Johnny gets here, he and I are going to talk for a while. You can build with blocks or play with your fire truck until we’ve finished.

No. I want to talk with you.

Nell shook her head. Not today. We’re going to close the door and have grown-up talk while you play down here in the kitchen.

His little shoulders drooped. He dropped his head momentarily, then looked up with a smile. It’s okay, Mam. But don’t talk long or Johnny will get too tired to play.

She draped her arm around him. We’ll keep our conversation as short as possible. He’ll not be too tired to play.

The morning games her two sons shared were sacred to Johnny. No matter how exhausted he might be after his shift at the firehouse, he spent time with the little boy—telling him stories, roughhousing, playing ball. More than a big brother, he was a father figure. Just fifteen when his dad died, Johnny had taken his overwhelming sadness and—with love and grace—transformed it into stories for Jimmy. Early on, Nell worried that he made Emmet too grand, but she came to appreciate the tall tales. Johnny was preserving the best of his father for himself as well as for his brother.

Jimmy’s bright voice interrupted her musing. I can wait on the stoop, though. So I’ll see Johnny first. Right, Mam?

Right. You can send him on up to my room.

Five minutes later, Johnny rounded the corner and watched his little brother leap down the stairs and dash toward him. You’re in a right hurry today, Jimmy.

I am. I need your help before you go in for your talk with Mam. He pointed to the adjoining house. "Up there, right on top of the light. See, it’s a bird nest. Mick saw the eggs when the mother flew away yesterday. He says they’re blue. She’s gone again, but she’ll be back in a minute. If we’re quick, I can ride on