Never So Good (NHB Modern Plays)
()
About this ebook
Set against a back-drop of fading Empire, war, the Suez crisis, vintage champagne, adultery and vicious Tory politics at the Ritz, Never So Good paints the portrait of a brilliant, witty but complex man, at times comically and, in the end, tragically out of kilter with his times.
Harold Macmillan, the Eton-educated idealist who rushed, with Homer's Iliad under his arm, to do his duty in the Grenadier Guards, is tormented by the harsh experiences of war and an unhappy marriage. His career in the 1930s is blocked by his loyalty to Winston Churchill, and he nearly loses his life in the Second World War. When at last he becomes Prime Minister he is brought down by the Profumo scandal.
'gripping, compassionate and often delightfully comic... his finest achievement to date' - Telegraph
Howard Brenton
Howard Brenton was born in Portsmouth in 1942. His many plays include Christie in Love (Portable Theatre, 1969); Revenge (Theatre Upstairs, 1969); Magnificence (Royal Court Theatre, 1973); The Churchill Play (Nottingham Playhouse, 1974, and twice revived by the RSC, 1978 and 1988); Bloody Poetry (Foco Novo, 1984, and Royal Court Theatre, 1987); Weapons of Happiness (National Theatre, Evening Standard Award, 1976); Epsom Downs (Joint Stock Theatre, 1977); Sore Throats (RSC, 1978); The Romans in Britain (National Theatre, 1980, revived at the Crucible Theatre, Sheffield, 2006); Thirteenth Night (RSC, 1981); The Genius (1983), Greenland (1988) and Berlin Bertie (1992), all presented by the Royal Court; Kit’s Play (RADA Jerwood Theatre, 2000); Paul (National Theatre, 2005); In Extremis (Shakespeare’s Globe, 2006 and 2007); Never So Good (National Theatre, 2008); The Ragged Trousered Philanthropists adapted from the novel by Robert Tressell (Liverpool Everyman and Chichester Festival Theatre, 2010); Anne Boleyn (Shakespeare’s Globe, 2010 and 2011); 55 Days (Hampstead Theatre, 2012); #aiww: The Arrest of Ai Weiwei (Hampstead Theatre, 2013); The Guffin (NT Connections, 2013); Drawing the Line (Hampstead Theatre, 2013) and Doctor Scroggy's War (Shakespeare's Globe, 2014); Lawrence After Arabia (Hampstead Theatre, 2016) and The Blinding Light (Jermyn Street Theatre, 2017). Collaborations with other writers include Brassneck (with David Hare, Nottingham Playhouse, 1972); Pravda (with David Hare, National Theatre, Evening Standard Award, 1985) and Moscow Gold (with Tariq Ali, RSC, 1990). Versions of classics include The Life of Galileo (1980) and Danton’s Death (1982) both for the National Theatre, Goethe’s Faust (1995/6) for the RSC, a new version of Danton’s Death for the National Theatre (2010) and Dances of Death (Gate Theatre, 2013). He wrote thirteen episodes of the BBC1 drama series Spooks (2001–05, BAFTA Best Drama Series, 2003).
Read more from Howard Brenton
Drawing the Line (NHB Modern Plays) Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Blinding Light (NHB Modern Plays) Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsCancelling Socrates (NHB Modern Plays) Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsDoctor Scroggy's War (NHB Modern Plays) Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsPaul (NHB Modern Plays) Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Shadow Factory (NHB Modern Plays) Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsJude (NHB Modern Plays) Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsEternal Love (NHB Modern Plays) Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsDances of Death (NHB Modern Plays) Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings
Related to Never So Good (NHB Modern Plays)
Related ebooks
Wendy & Peter Pan (NHB Modern Plays) Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5My Life as a Torpedo Test Target Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Soldiers of the Silent War: Sam’s Valor, #1 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsBehind the Mirror Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Something to Remember You By: A Perilous Romance Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Promise Me Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsSecret City: The Galhadria Trilogy, #1 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Death Scene Artist Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5STARGATE SG-1 Survival of the Fittest Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsCasino Infernale Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsWilliam Austen Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsMoorland Forensics - A Gathering of Angels Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsFor Good Reason Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsJove Brand Is Near Death Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Dare To Dream Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsHot Mess (NHB Modern Plays) Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5By Any Means Necessary Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Humorist Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Fallen Angels Vol 2: Guardian Angels & Angels on my Mind Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsMy Life as Alien Monster Bait Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Potato Thief Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsSlaughter of Eagles Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Oscar Wilde and the Return of Jack the Ripper: An Oscar Wilde Mystery Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Sins of Fathers: A Spectacular Break from a Dark Criminal Past Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Coolatully (NHB Modern Plays) Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5I Know This Much: From Soho to Spandau Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Scenes from a Life Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsReparations Maze Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsI Forced a Bot to Write This Book: A.I. Meets B.S. Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5And the Angels Sing Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings
Performing Arts For You
Down the Rabbit Hole: Curious Adventures and Cautionary Tales of a Former Playboy Bunny Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Measure: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Romeo and Juliet Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Bell Jar: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Robin Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing: A Memoir Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Yes Please Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5For colored girls who have considered suicide/When the rainbow is enuf Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Diamond Eye: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5As You Wish: Inconceivable Tales from the Making of The Princess Bride Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Becoming Free Indeed: My Story of Disentangling Faith from Fear Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Macbeth (new classics) Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Our Town: A Play in Three Acts Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Coreyography: A Memoir Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Born a Crime: Stories from a South African Childhood Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Women: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Sisters Brothers Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Romeo and Juliet, with line numbers Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5A Midsummer Night's Dream, with line numbers Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Hollywood's Dark History: Silver Screen Scandals Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Dolly Parton, Songteller: My Life in Lyrics Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Story: Style, Structure, Substance, and the Principles of Screenwriting Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Finding Me: An Oprah's Book Club Pick Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Stories I Only Tell My Friends: An Autobiography Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5A Dolls House Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Slave Play Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5How to Make Love Like a Porn Star: A Cautionary Tale Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Huckleberry Finn Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5
Reviews for Never So Good (NHB Modern Plays)
0 ratings0 reviews
Book preview
Never So Good (NHB Modern Plays) - Howard Brenton
ACT ONE
The Wound (1909-1916)
HAROLD MACMILLAN wanders onto the stage. White tie, an elegant cane in one hand, a whisky and soda in the other. He is very relaxed and addresses the audience.
MACMILLAN. I always had trouble with my teeth. Bad teeth in politics are not good. It’s cruel, but people will always make moral judgements from appearances. It got a lot worse when television came. The BBC was a dental nightmare.
He sips his whisky.
Enter the Eton Wall Game. Two teams of eleven young PLAYERS in pre-First World War games kit. Amongst them are the YOUNG HAROLD MACMILLAN and YOUNG HARRY CROOKSHANK.
As they enter they are singing the Eton Boating Song, raucously:
PLAYERS. Jolly boating weather,
And a hay harvest breeze,
Blade on the feather,
Shade off the trees,
Swing swing together,
With your bodies between your knees,
Swing swing together,
With your bodies between your knees.
The PLAYERS jam in a huddle against the wall.
They shout:
YOUNG CROOKSHANK. Bully! Bully! Bully! Bully! Bully! Bully!
They freeze.
MACMILLAN (aside). Winston always had good teeth. Despite the cigars, Cuban tobacco juices flowing in the root canals. It was probably the brandy kept the Churchillian enamel clean. When I became Prime Minister I had my errant incisors capped. I also grew my hair thicker, oiled it a little. And when I went to Moscow to meet the Communist leaders, I wore a furry, white Russian hat. Yes, in politics one learns to play the tart.
The Wall Game continues. One team – the Collegers – are struggling to form a phalanx, a tunnel at an angle to the wall.
YOUNG CROOKSHANK (shouting). College! College! Phalanx! Phalanx! College, phalanx!
The Wall Game freezes.
MACMILLAN (aside). Chipped a tooth in the Eton Wall Game. The rules allow a fist to be held permanently in the face of an opponent without actually punching them – a very English kind of brutality. Thoroughly enjoyed playing the Wall Game. Every century or so someone actually scores a goal. Which is meant to teach one something, though I haven’t the faintest idea what.
The Wall Game continues.
YOUNG MACMILLAN breaks away from the mass of bodies. The ball flies out to him. He is startled to find it in his hands.
YOUNG CROOKSHANK. Harold! Lines! Kick! Lines!
YOUNG MAC kicks the ball offstage. The other PLAYERS rush off shouting:
PLAYERS. Calyx calyx calyx! Ball in bad calyx! Well done, Harold! Ball in calyx!
YOUNG MAC and MACMILLAN pause. Then they talk to each other.
YOUNG MAC. I hated Eton.
MACMILLAN. That’s why I draw a veil.
YOUNG MAC. When Mummy took me out of college, they said I’d been sent away for buggery.
MACMILLAN. Draw a veil.
YOUNG MAC. Mummy told people it was pneumonia.
MACMILLAN. Yes.
YOUNG MAC and MACMILLAN both take out rimless glasses, put them on and look at each other.
Then YOUNG MAC runs off.
MACMILLAN smiles at the audience.
(Aside.) Anthony Eden. Anthony had wonderful teeth, a dazzling array for the television age. But not even that beautiful mouth in millions of living rooms could save him. And teeth weren’t my biggest physical problem. That began in the Great War. When my mother finally got me there.
Enter HELEN ‘NELLIE’ MACMILLAN. She paces. She reads a letter. She folds it into her hand.
Enter YOUNG MAC. He is in the civilian day clothes of 1915.
NELLIE. Harold, darling boy.
Kisses him.
Were you very late last night?
YOUNG MAC. Very.
NELLIE. How is Southend?
YOUNG MAC. Beastly.
NELLIE. But lots of sea air.
YOUNG MAC. Oh, billows and billows.
NELLIE. Well, that will do you good…
YOUNG MAC. To be stuck in the Royal Rifle Corps, and in Southend-on-Sea! It’s too bloody shaming.
NELLIE. You’ve been ill, Harold.
YOUNG MAC. The war to save civilisation breaks out and I get appendicitis! And put in a training battalion, where the only dangerous thing is a portion of fish and chips! Somehow, one way or another, I’ve just got to try to get shot.
NELLIE. No, Harold.
YOUNG MAC. Well, shot at. You do want me to fight, don’t you?
NELLIE. Of course I want you to fight! But I also think of what it means.
YOUNG MAC. It means glory.
NELLIE. Or vanity.
YOUNG MAC. Not… not… not if it’s glory in the eye of God.
She sighs.
NELLIE. Oh, Harold, you can be so serious, sometimes it makes my skin crawl.
YOUNG MAC. Oh. Very sorry.
NELLIE. It’s just that when you were a boy I wish you had… sometimes, you know, done things with frogs.
YOUNG MAC. What things with frogs? Pulled their legs off?
NELLIE. Well, yes.
YOUNG MAC. Amazing the ways one can disappoint one’s mother.
NELLIE. If you ever really disappointed me, Harold, you’d know it.
YOUNG MAC. Yes. I think I would.
They laugh. They kiss cheeks.
NELLIE. I’ve done a thing.
YOUNG MAC. What thing?
NELLIE. Don’t go cranky on me.
YOUNG MAC. What have you done?
NELLIE. Cranky, serious on me.
YOUNG MAC. Mummy… what?
NELLIE. I have, how to say this… I have prostituted my position in English society on your behalf. Well, at least, cashed my position in. I’ve got you a commission in the Grenadier Guards.
A beat.
YOUNG MAC. That’s a shocking thing to do.
NELLIE. I know.
SMITHSON, a servant, is approaching. With great respect he carries before him, on a hanger, the uniform of a Captain of the Grenadier Guards.
YOUNG MAC. Privilege of the worst kind.
NELLIE. I know.
YOUNG MAC. Really shocking!
NELLIE. Yes.
YOUNG MAC. And absolutely, tremendously wonderful.
NELLIE is delighted.
He sees SMITHSON with the uniform.
Oh, Smithson, I say.
A nod from NELLIE to SMITHSON.
SMITHSON. Perhaps, sir, you would like to change into the uniform of an officer and a gentleman?
NELLIE turns her back on them. YOUNG MAC, with SMITHSON’s help, begins to change into the uniform.
YOUNG MAC. The only privilege I’m taking is, I suppose, to get myself killed or wounded as soon as possible.
NELLIE. One thing I want you to promise: you won’t see Ronald Knox before you go.
MACMILLAN. Never leaves you, that nursery taste in the mouth. The