The original Anaconda was a fun B-movie bolstered by a good cast; Anacondas: The Hunt for the Blood Orchid was a more than serviceable sequel, despite zero star power; Anacondas 3: Offspring is made-for-TV drivel shot in Romania where movie-making is cheap, and its stars are The Hoff and Gimli. No famous faces would have been preferable.
The risible plot sees sexy blonde herpetologist Amanda Hayes (Crystal Allen) team up with ruthless hunter Hammett (David Hasselhoff) and a team of mercenaries to find and destroy a deadly snake that has escaped from a laboratory owned by terminally ill billionaire Murdoch (John Rhys-Davies), head of Wexel Hall Pharmaceuticals. For reasons too convoluted to go into, the snake is over 60ft long and still growing and has a big spike on the end of its tail with which it impales its prey.
With a terrible supporting cast comprising largely of local Romanian talent, diabolical special effects (the green screened backdrop used whenever someone is driving a vehicle is appalling), ridiculous creature design (in addition to a spiked tail, the snake also has glowing red areas around its head), and a script that rips off both Aliens (the mercs obviously inspired by that film's marines) and Predator (Amanda avoids being attacked when she is covered in mud), the film is barely watchable, its only plus points being some gore (severed limbs, decapitations, impalements) and the fact that Crystal Allen spends much of the time in a tight white vest.
To make things worse, the streaming site I found this on made me watch a music video by a whiny rapper called Pk3y before the film started. Talk about adding insult to injury!
