Arthur

Hobson: My name is Lillian and I am an alcoholic. I'm rich, I'm fabulously rich. I'm also generous and kind-hearted. My father died when I was young and my mother was absent most of the time. Is this an excuse for making a mockery of my life? Oh, it all looks very wild from the outside. I once went to bed with three European princesses at the same time, but: A. I can't remember anything about it, and B: apparently I vomited over two of them before losing control of my bladder on the third. Oh, yes, all such fun... until the fog parts and suddenly there's a hole so big that all the vintage champagne and all the Batmobiles on the world can't fill it. Then I'm all alone on my magnetic bed, wondering what venereal disease I've just caught.

Arthur: Always the quiet ones.