Maneater

Yessirree y'all, the redneck saves the day, gawdammit!

The acting and script in this much-hyped film is absolutely atrocious. Why Jeff Fahey signed up for it beats me, maybe he has money troubles.

We're led to believe that these people are stranded on this island, with no hope of rescue, but every time there's a wider camera shot there's loads of boats around!

The CGI shark is amazing, able to change it size and shape at will.

The island paradise this film is set in is supposedly off Hawaii, but could well be Bognor, as it's as grey, windy and dark as a British summer.

Our hero, Harlan, struggles to speak discernable English, and is to acting as freezing water is to an erection.

Sadly, yet another film in the 'why did they bother' category.