It's not an original comment at all, but after enduring DRIVE-AWAY DOLLS, I really felt like I had been left dumber than I was going in. This movie is such a massive mis-fire, I'm really shocked it got any kind of release. What drew me in was my 40 year long affection for the films of the Coen Brothers. I figured with a film from Ethan Coen, I was in for a breezy good time like some of the Coen's lesser works offered (I'm thinking INTOLERABLE CRUELTY or maybe BURN AFTER READING). What I got was a ridiculous mash-up of themes, none of which were well thought out or entertaining.
This 84 minute movie follows Jamie (Margaret Qualley) and Marian (Geraldine Viswanathan), two friends who also happen to be lesbians (but are not "together"). Jamie is a wild-child from Texas, all one-night stands and hedonistic. Marian is buttoned-up and hasn't had a lover in 3 years or more. While not exactly closeted, the 1999 setting of this film means she isn't exactly openly gay either. They decide to take a trip down to Tallahassee (I don't even recall all the rationale for that), and to make it financially viable to do so, they use a drive-away service that hooks them up with a car bound for that very Florida city. Sadly, the owner of the drive-away service thought the two young ladies worked for the criminals who ARE supposed to be driving the car south, leading to a pair of "goons" (as listed in the credits) to chase after the two young ladies in a time before real cell phone coverage or other tech that might have made the pursuit easier.
Antics ensue, revolving mostly around the sexual shenanigans of the two girls (mostly kinda icky), the endless arguments between the two goons (none of which were interesting at all) and the eventual discovery of what was in the trunk of the car that the ladies aren't supposed to know about (involving the creation of plaster casts made of the private parts of certain conservative political figures).
My biggest problem with the film was the ridiculous, over-the-top portrayal of lesbian sexuality. Coupled with the silly plaster casts we are often obliged to gaze at, and you've got a film that feels like it was written by a ninth grade boy who doesn't understand how sex works and REALLY doesn't understand how lesbian sex works. Most of the sex scenes were embarrassing to watch, they were so childish.
These scenes MIGHT have been at least some fun, had they not starred the truly dreadful Margaret Qualley. I've seen her give decent performances before (NOVITIATE, ONCE UPON A TIME IN HOLLYWOOD), but here her wild energy is uncontained and generic. Nothing she does feels rooted in any kind of reality, even the skewed reality of this film. It wants to be a daring performance; instead, it is silly and not for one moment did it feel like I watching a real person. Viswanathan, on the other hand, is marginally convincing, and the only character we root for at all.
Pedro Pascal and Matt Damon make very brief cameo appearances. They both look dreadfully embarrassed to be in the film. (I felt actively bad for Damon.) And the film even manages to make the delightful Colman Domingo uninteresting.
A deep disappointment, insulting to lesbians (rather than "liberating" as I assume it intended to be) and simply stunning to be coming from Ethan Coen. Avoid!!
