The Gospel of Thomas
The Gospel of Thomas
The Gospel of Thomas
Thomas
A Blueprint for Spiritual Growth
By David F. Capps
The Gospel of Thomas,
A Blueprint for Spiritual Growth
All rights reserved. This electronic form of the book may be distributed
freely at no cost as long as no changes are made to the book or text.
Please respect the rights of the author. If there is any question about
proper use, please contact the publisher.
ISBN 0-9774198-0-0
Published by:
The Gnostic Wisdom Foundation
104 Jefferson Drive
Kamiah, ID 83536
866-389-5233
FAX 208-926-4169
www.gnosticwisdom.org
ii
Acknowledgements
This book would not have been possible without the loving
support and faith of my dear wife and life partner, Miriam G.
Carroll. This book is also the result of teaching presented in the
spiritual growth class in Kooskia, Idaho, the students of which
are an inspiration to me in their faithful attention to spiritual
principles, their curiosity and their openness to learn new facts
and details of our religious and spiritual past. I would also like to
acknowledge Carol Asher, Miriam G. Carroll and Rhonda Carroll
for their help in reading and refining the information in this book.
David F. Capps
iii
iv
Table of Contents
v
vi
About the Author
David began his spiritual quest in 1970 at the age of 23.
He had become disenchanted with the Christian approach to
religion and embarked on a study of Eastern religions. David’s
quest, like that of so many other people, was really a search for
truth. The vast array of information available quickly leaves the
searcher dazed and confused, hoping to find something which
“feels right” and “makes sense”. David spent several months
considering what the truth might look like so it could be
recognized when it was seen. He decided the truth was
something which remained largely unchanged by the passage of
time, the effect of different cultures, and the great distances
separating the people and religious systems around the globe.
By comparing spiritual principles from different religious systems
and sorting out the differences, a core set of basic “truths”
emerged. This allowed a focusing of effort on a simple set of
spiritual principles and practices.
This focused practice resulted in his having a classical
mystical experience in February of 1985, where David found
vii
himself standing in the presence of God. Everything physical had
disappeared. Only he and God remained. During this time David
experienced the overwhelming unconditional love which comes
from God. The revelations regarding life, death and the true
nature of spirit quickly followed. The intensity of this experience
slowly faded over a three month period. By early summer he was
asking, “Is this it? You bring me into Your presence and Your
light and in three months it fades and goes away?” He was
shown that if he continued with the spiritual practices he had
learned he would permanently re-enter this state of grace he
experienced during his mystical experience. That took place
seven years later, in 1992. David now lives completely within the
presence of God and has been sharing his insights with all those
who take the time to listen.
David has been teaching spiritual growth to a weekly
class since 1987 and is demonstrating the depth of
understanding present in a true spiritual master. This book is a
result of that level of insight and understanding.
David lives in North Central Idaho and can be contacted
through the publisher, The Gnostic Wisdom Foundation.
Hello :-)
My name is Kevin Elliott. In searching for answers to
spiritual questions I had a few years ago, I chanced upon a book
entitled The Gospel of Thomas: A Blueprint for Spiritual Growth,
by David F. Capps. Little did I realize at the time how much this
book would change my life.
The main section of the book covers teachings taken
from the 114 sayings of Jesus that make up the Gospel of
Thomas. Afterwards, David gives us a simple set of exercises
that gradually help us to confront and resolve our inner negativity
in order for us to grow spiritually and progress towards
spiritual enlightenment. Although it's based upon a Gnostic text,
the teachings are universal in scope. I have come to understand
over the years that many religious and spiritual traditions share
the same spiritual truths and principles, such as recognizing the
need to deal with our inner negativity as well as practicing
kindness and respect for others.
The thing I love about this book is how
refreshingly simple and straightforward it is in its approach. A lot
viii
of times I came across religious and spiritual teachings that were
filled with rules and rituals that didn't make any sense to me,
much less help me on my spiritual path. What I was looking for
were simple, practical methods that I could use to help resolve
my inner pain and suffering so I could experience Love and True
Happiness in my heart. Occasionally, I unwittingly stumbled upon
such a spiritual encounter in my search for Truth, but I didn't
understand how the process worked in order to repeat and
even deepen the experience. David showed me how to do just
that - and he did it without piling on all that needless religious
dogma, rules, rituals, etc. I have nothing against those things in
and of themselves; I'm just a simple kind of guy who doesn’t
want to feel like I’m wasting my time as I search for the answers
to my problems. Perhaps you can relate to that?
The teachings address the spirit (our higher self) and
ego (our lower self) and how our fear-based emotions and other
negativity feed the ego, making it stronger and more controlling
over our lives. This results in our experience of pain and
suffering and is often spread to other people through our actions
in the world. An example of this would be an angry person
yelling at someone who had nothing to do with his or her foul
temper. The solution is to stop feeding the ego negative
emotions and to begin feeding our spirit love-based emotions so
that it can awaken from its deep sleep, grow and in time become
empowered. Inner healing also needs to take place in order for
us to gradually transform the negative thoughts and emotions
already stored within us into positive affirmations and love-based
emotions. In time, with persistence, spiritual growth is achieved
and the individual progresses towards the conscious realization
of spiritual enlightenment.
With sufficient spiritual growth comes the expansion of
our hearts and minds, allowing us to consciously realize our True
Selves (the part of us that is of the same essence as God), as
well as the realization of Divine Love and Oneness with All. The
exercises also help us to gradually dispel falsehoods and
illusions from our consciousness, allowing us to sharpen our
perceptions in order to "see" and experience Reality as it is.
The exercises at the end of this simple, easy-to-read
book basically help the individual to gradually remove all the
mental and emotional blocks from their consciousness that
prevent them from experiencing the Presence of God (Nirvana,
spiritual enlightenment, Heaven on Earth, the blissful states of
Peace, Love and Joy, etc.).
ix
David F. Capps can be reached through The Gnostic
Wisdom Foundation (www.gnosticwisdom.org).
David was kind enough to allow me to share his book
freely with people online. If you wish, you may download a PDF
version of The Gospel of Thomas in its entirety on
www.memoware.com.
To find David's e-book on this website, all you have to
do is search for "Capps" and follow the instructions on the
download page. If, for any reason, you are unable to download
your copy, please contact me at Audiosane@aol.com with an
e-mail address where I can send the e-book.
This book is also available for free in its entirety on
MySpace. Here's the URL address:
www.myspace.com/thegospelofthomas
For those who prefer more copies of the paperback
version, David's book is also available on www.amazon.com
and www.gnosticwisdom.org. If you're using
www.amazon.com, simply do a search for "David Capps".
Thank you so much for your time. I hope I have been of
help to you.
Take care.
Kevin :-)
x
Forward
xi
backgrounds, this training sometimes makes it more difficult to
perceive the exact meaning of these ancient texts because the
tendency is to try to translate, or create an expression in our
modern language that is not at odds with the religious beliefs of
the scholar. As a result, some translations fail to make much
sense and seem at odds with everything else. Most scholars
agree that the ancient texts are enigmatic at best, and border on
“unexplainable”, based on our modern understanding of the
world. As more and more of the ancient texts are translated and
the information in them becomes more accepted, some, if not
many, of the translations will need to be revised to reflect the
newly emerging wealth of details and depth of understanding
which is just now beginning to unfold.
We are indebted to the scholars for their dedication,
knowledge and expertise in a difficult and demanding field. Their
personal integrity and the integrity of their work is constantly
being challenged by those who would have their own political of
religious agenda supported and strengthened by ancient
sources. The reality is, many of our modern beliefs and religious
foundations are not being borne out by the recovered texts.
While a number of attempts have been, and are being, made to
explain away the glaring differences between the ancient texts
and our modern beliefs, we must, in the near future, come to
terms with the veracity and integrity of the information being
recovered.
The ancient world being revealed is surprisingly different
from what we imagined it to be. A stunningly clear record of life
in the ancient cities is emerging which portrays a civilization
rivaling today’s standards, encompassing an impressive
educational system, legal tradition, and governmental
organization not seen until the last two centuries of our modern
history. And yet, the evidence, as disturbing as it is to the
traditional view of history, documents in minute detail the
workings of a thoroughly modern and refined civilization and
social structure in existence for thousands of years before the
Greek and Roman empires.
As disturbing as the discovery of a “modern” civilization
in the time frame of 6,000 to 12,000 years ago may be, the
impact of the ancient religious documents and texts upon the
accepted doctrine of the modern church, mosque, or synagogue
is no less than devastating. A new spiritual paradigm is emerging
which encompasses both the ancient and modern texts in what
is actually a very old spiritual perspective. Far from being
xii
ignorant pagans, our distant ancestors had a very impressive
grasp and understanding of spiritual principles. This tradition has
been passed down through the ages in the esoteric sayings and
teachings of spiritual masters like Krishna, Buddha and Jesus.
The truth held in common among these diverse spiritual
leaders is brought to life by a living spiritual master. Once we
begin to grasp the hidden wisdom embedded in every religious
system, we begin to understand they were all talking about the
same thing. This universal spiritual truth forms the foundation of
every religion and has been with us from the very beginning.
Through the new spiritual paradigm the unification, not only of
the self, but of mankind is possible. We stand now on the
threshold of a new age of understanding and enlightenment. The
secret knowledge of the past is not only revealed, but explained
in modern terms and simple language so everyone can learn and
experience the truth for themselves.
There is no mystery we cannot understand. We are
dedicated to bringing the inner wisdom to all who will open their
mind and heart and take their first real step into a larger world of
awareness, perception, and consciousness. We hold to the
principle that everyone is a divine child of God, created and
constantly held in perfect equality, perfect love and perfect
wholeness (holiness) in the mind of God. As such we are very
pleased to bring you an example of this new spiritual paradigm in
the form of an explanation of the sayings of Jesus in The Gospel
of Thomas.
We hope you enjoy the work and insights of this author.
xiii
xiv
INTRODUCTION
xvi
One hundred fifty to 200 years would pass before the
rise of Christianity challenged the Gnostic system of religion.
Early leaders of the Christian Church recognized that Rome was
the center of political power and chose to align themselves with
that power and authority. The marriage between the Christian
Church and political power was formalized at the council of
Nicea in 325 AD. Under the direction of the Emperor
Constantine, bishops in the Christian Church ascended to the
position of judges, with the military power of Rome at their
disposal. Anything that differed from the approved Christian
doctrine was deemed a heresy, and was to be destroyed.
Gnosticism (direct knowledge of God) was deemed a
heresy by the Church and an aggressive program followed to rid
the world of heretical documents. The final conflict between
Rome and Alexandria came to a head in 391 AD 2 , when Bishop
Theophilus of Alexandria, under the Roman Emperor
Theodosius I, led an angry mob of Christians across the city to
the Temple of Serapis, destroying the statues, tapestries,
artwork and icons in the temple and then focusing their rage on
the library in the main wing of the temple, and in a day’s time,
destroyed the collected knowledge and wisdom of thousands of
years. They burned all writings that did not agree with the
doctrine of the Roman Christian Church. So it was that the
center of religion was changed from Alexandria and its Gnostics
to the Christians in Rome. God and divinity was relegated to
outer, rather than inner expression.
The persecution of the Gnostics continued while
foresighted individuals secreted copies of their sacred scriptures
away, sealed in earthen jars, buried in eastern central Egypt,
praying for the day when the ancient wisdom would once again
be shared openly. Through this persecution and the deliberate
destruction of sacred documents the Gospel of Thomas was
“lost”.
During the excavation of ruins in Oxyrhynchus, Egypt, in
1897 and 1903, over 5,000 fragments of ancient Greek texts
were recovered from another ancient library. Among them were
partial sections of what was believed to be the Gospel of
Thomas. Due to a lack of other comparable documents, the
discovery languished in the halls of academia through two world
wars, remaining a curiosity and source of varied speculation.
In 1945, with the discovery of the buried earthen jars
some 30 miles north of the Valley of the Kings near the town of
Nag Hammadi, the world of the Gnostics sprang back to life as
xvii
dozens of ancient Gnostic sacred scriptures were recovered.
What became known as the “Nag Hammadi Scrolls” opened the
door, releasing the “lost” ancient knowledge and wisdom again
into the world. The two primary tasks were first to translate the
ancient texts, and secondly to interpret the writings in modern
terms so the people of our world could have access to the
knowledge and wisdom that led to the presence of God - that
which Jesus called “the Kingdom of Heaven” or “the Kingdom of
God”.
Once again the inner practice of divinity and spiritual
growth is taking hold in the world, and once again the conflict
between the inner expression of God and the belief in an outer
being, separate from us, is being thrust upon the world of
religion. In reading this explanation of the sayings of Jesus in the
Gospel of Thomas, you will get an essentially Gnostic perception
of Jesus, one contemporary with his life and experience in the
first century. With this knowledge and understanding, you can
determine which path, inner or outer, is right for you.
Unless otherwise indicated, we will be using the
translation by Thomas O. Lambdin. Scholars generally agree the
Gospel of Thomas is an esoteric text. In the traditional sense this
means the understanding of the text is restricted to a very few.
But the word “esoteric” also refers to inner, that which takes
place within the mind and heart. This also makes esoteric
teaching a system of inner transformation, which is how we will
view the text. Following the sayings is a section explaining the
exercises which will allow you to begin the process of
transformation described in the sayings. Let us now take the gift
of the scholars, the translation, and see what the inner path
means to us today.
xviii
THE SAYINGS
These are the secret sayings which the living Jesus spoke
and which Didymos Judas Thomas wrote down.
1
Testament is in John, Chapter 3 (RSV), between two top leaders
of the prime religious movements of the time, the Pharisees and
the Gnostics. Here traditional Judaism meets and questions
mystical Gnosticism. Nicodemus, a ruler of the Jews, comes to
Jesus by night (the darkness represents ignorance), saying,
“Rabbi, we know that you are a teacher come from God; for no
one can do these signs that you do, unless God is with him.”
Jesus answered him, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is
born anew (or from above), he cannot see the Kingdom of God.”
Nicodemus said to him, “How can a man be born when he is
old? Can he enter a second time into his mother’s womb and be
born?” Jesus answered, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is
born of water and the Spirit, he cannot enter the Kingdom of
God. That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is
born of the Spirit is spirit.”
Here Jesus clearly defines two separate and distinct things.
That which is born of the flesh is flesh. Our ego, or outer
personality, is born of the flesh. It is called the false self or
corrupted nature in the Gnostic system. That which is born of the
Spirit is spirit. This is the true self, incorruptible and eternal.
Notice that the first use of Spirit is capitalized, while the second
spirit is not. The capitalized Spirit refers to God, the Creator,
while the other spirit refers to that which is in each of us, our
personal spirit. We are created in the image of God. On a
practical level, this means that God created us out of God
substance (spirit); just as a woman brings forth a child from her
own substance, so too has God brought forth each of us from
His own substance. The source of all life is Spirit (God), and
everything that lives has some of that substance of God in it. The
spirit within each of us is an individualized expression of the
Spirit that is God.
In the Gnostic system a person was considered spiritually
dead until their spirit was awakened. The awakening and
empowerment of the spirit was referred to as resurrection, or
being raised up from the dead, and applied only to the spirit
within, not the physical body. This is why Jesus says “leave the
dead to bury their own dead.” As long as the consciousness is
attached to the ego, or outer personality, it is temporary; it has
no real life of its own. It is only when consciousness is attached
to the spirit that it gains permanent status, for only the spirit
remains alive after physical death. When people die do we not
say “they are gone”? Clearly the body is still there. We can see
2
it, we can touch it. So what is gone? The spirit, the God
substance, our personal source of life is gone, not the body.
So, “whoever finds the interpretation of these sayings will not
experience death” describes the result of the process of moving
the attachment of consciousness from the ego over to the spirit.
In this process the spirit becomes awakened from its deep sleep,
grows, matures, and takes its place as a mature spiritual being
operating fully and completely in the presence of God (which
Jesus often calls “the Kingdom”).
3
every belief we have. This is at first very disturbing, but through
our willingness to change, a greater truth and a resulting
blessing will become manifest in our lives.
The Gnostic process is one of creating direct
experiences with the presence of God. Those experiences bring
an in-depth understanding, step by step, about the nature of
God, our creation, our true nature, and the exotic process we
have begun. What we learn from this direct experience is often
counter to the traditional teachings of religion. For example,
religion teaches that God is jealous and vengeful and that God
will judge us (usually harshly) for any and all transgressions
during our lives. And yet one of the experiences we have along
the way in our spiritual growth is of the unconditional love that
comes directly from God. In this experience we discover that this
is not an intellectual revelation, as we might expect, but rather a
profound, deeply moving, emotional experience. I have yet to
meet someone who has experienced this love that comes
directly from God that has not been moved completely to tears. It
is one of the most intense experiences in life. What we realize
after this experience is that there was no judgment from God at
all. Of all the condemnations we have received from others, and
of particular importance, from our own ego, none of them
materialize in this intense experience of God’s love for us.
Have we not done things that are improper, demanding
judgment in some form, if not from the world then certainly from
God? How can it be that we receive unconditional love in place
of punishment? This contradicts what we have been taught
about God. This experience of unconditional love, especially an
experience this intense, shakes our belief in judgment and
punishment from God to the very core of our being. Once this
realization sinks into our consciousness, our very concept of God
is challenged. We find ourselves asking the same question that
Nicodemus asked, “How can this be?”
Were this experience of unconditional love an isolated
incidence, we could dismiss it as an aberration. But it is not the
only experience we encounter; other experiences bring us a
deep abiding sense of peace, an inner joy, serenity, and a
connectedness with God on a very personal level. These other
experiences are consistent with the unconditional love that we
receive from God. Totally absent is any form of judgment,
criticism or punishment. The disturbing shock to our belief in a
God of judgment gradually gives way to the reality of a loving,
gentle God of Spirit, hope, and eternal life. In time we find
4
ourselves becoming an integral part of the oneness that is God
and creation together, a vibrant individual in an interactive
universe - one conscious element in an ocean of consciousness,
a mature spiritual being functioning fully and completely in the
presence of God. We find ourselves not only living in the
presence of God, but functioning as an active, directive force
with the complete resources of God at our disposal.
This direct experience of the presence of God is the
central core of the Gnostic experience and the transformational
power of the teachings of Jesus. It is not a factor of belief or
faith. It is the result of an intimate, repeated inner experience that
leaves no room for doubt. We do not have to believe, for we
have experienced the presence of God for ourselves. We do not
have to have faith, for we are living the experience day after day.
It is not what we think; it is what we know as a result of our direct
experience with God.
The Coptic version adds; “an[d reigning] he will [rest.]”
Our own ego perceives “reigning” and “ruling” as the ultimate
power and authority over others. Yet as we become one with
God and creation, we find that it is not others that need to be
ruled over, it is our own lower nature, the domain of the ego
itself. In oneness we see that others are not in need of being
ruled as much as they are in need of being educated and
enlightened. We as a species need help, not judgment or
punishment. The “rest” spoken of here is the deep abiding peace
of God, the serenity that comes with the presence of God in our
lives. It is not a withdrawal from life and society, but an
understanding of the basic human need for God that fills us with
compassion, gentleness, kindness and respect for each and
every creature in creation. We become more connected, more
integrated into the fabric of humanity, and more determined to
teach and help. Our desire and commitment rests in the certainty
of God’s presence and unconditional love. There is no greater
peace. There is no greater power.
5
(3) Jesus said, “If those who lead you say to you,
‘See, the kingdom is in the sky,’ then the birds of the
sky will precede you. If they say to you, ‘It is in the
sea,’ then the fish will precede you. Rather, the
kingdom is inside of you, and it is outside of you.
When you come to know yourselves, then you will
become known, and you will realize that it is you
who are the sons of the living father. But if you will
not know yourselves, you dwell in poverty and it is
you who are that poverty.”
6
experiencing, and realizing that gradually transforms us, raising
our level of knowledge, understanding, and wisdom, until our
mind, heart and spirit have been raised up, entering into higher
and higher levels of consciousness, until we find ourselves in a
state of oneness with God and all of creation. This is the
Kingdom, this state of oneness, this condition of 100% full
conscious contact with God, a condition we now call the ‘Christ
Consciousness’. In this consciousness we take our rightful place
as mature children of God – “sons” of the living father, spirit
created out of Spirit, true spiritual beings, forever living in the
presence of God.
Consciousness is not something that is simply in our
head or mind. It is more than just “inside” us. In some spiritual
systems, once a person has progressed to a certain level, there
is no longer an oral or written form of instruction. The student
simply spends a number of hours each day sitting and meditating
in the presence of the master. There develops a shared
consciousness and in that process the student enters into, and
experiences, higher states of consciousness accessible only by
the spiritual master. The resulting shared experience educates
the student in a way unattainable by any other means.
The other interesting facet is that when people have the
experience of this higher state of consciousness they share so
many common elements with others that have experienced the
same state, that it is usually expressed as the one or highest
truth. It doesn’t seem to matter which spiritual system is used;
the end result is remarkably similar. The experience provides us
with a deep and unshakable knowledge that life goes on. After
this experience, it is common for people to lose their fear of
death. Calmness takes the place of fear. It is not a matter of
believing; it is a knowing, a certainty, a fact already proven. It
becomes the cornerstone of their life, transforming the mundane
into the sublime.
But if we will not put forth the effort and learn these inner
things about ourselves and for ourselves, we remain in
ignorance. We become prey to fantasies, lies and superstition.
Our only hope is to believe and blindly follow someone else,
trusting that they know something we do not, having faith that
they will not betray us. In the end we are always disappointed,
for it really is a case of the blind leading the blind. Only through
our own personal experiences in the presence of God can we
truly come to know the truth, and it is only through knowing the
truth that we can set ourselves free.
7
(4) Jesus said, “The man old in days will not hesitate to
ask a small child seven days old about the place in
life, and he will live. For many who are first will
become last, and they will become one and the
same.”
8
Here is the final realization of the ego: it is not the spirit. It is
what has come before, and it must decrease so that the spirit
may grow, mature, and become empowered. The ego now hears
the voice of the spirit within and begins to see its role clearly.
The ego now recognizes its purpose and the ultimate sacrifice it
must perform. John 3:31, “He who comes from above is above
all; he who is of the earth belongs to the earth, and of the earth
he speaks; he who comes from heaven is above all.” The ego
now recognizes that it is temporal, part of the physical body (of
the earth), and really knows only about physical life. But the spirit
is of God (comes from above) and is eternal. John 3:35, “The
Father loves the Son, and has given all things into his hand.” It is
the spirit within us that is the Son, and receives the things of
God.
The ego comes first and must become last. In the end the
ego surrenders completely and is merged into the spirit. The two
become one and the same. The separation of the spirit and the
ego is experienced as the separation of us from God. It is why
God initially appears as an entity outside of us. It is only when
the separation within is healed, and the ego and spirit become
one that we also become one with God. Separation is separation
from everything: each other, God, nature, eternal life. Oneness is
the result of inner healing, and it is oneness with everything. We
cannot be “one with God” and still perceive other people as
being separate. Nor can we be “one with God” and still perceive
anything in nature as being separate. Oneness is oneness, it is
total and complete or it is not real oneness.
9
Pause for a few moments and close your eyes. Observe the
thoughts that pass through your mind. Many times we will begin
to recognize how thoughts are connected, one to the next. Some
element of one thought acts as a string to the next thought, and
on and on it goes. You may even have a thought about how all
this works, even as the thoughts being observed continue on
uninterrupted. The question is this. If the thoughts being
observed are the activities of my mind, what is doing the
observing? Is the mind observing itself or is something else
going on? The classic question in this example is, “Who is the
observer?”
While some people see this as utter nonsense, others see
an opening into another level of perception, a new area of
exploration and experience. Those which follow this new lead
sometimes feel like they have followed Alice through the rabbit
hole into a strange new world where nothing really is as it seems
to be. Everything we have come to know and trust is now called
into question. In this journey of self discovery we come to see
ourselves as fractured pieces, held together by invisible buffers.
Programming and imprinting from parents, relatives, friends,
teachers, authority figures and mentors are all there, each in its
own little world, like pieces of a jig-saw puzzle. The task of self
discovery is to explore each of these pieces, determine the value
each presents, and discard the valueless. In this way the
individual pieces can be joined and the inner separation can be
healed. This leads to wholeness, holiness, and oneness.
With a little education about the mind and consciousness,
we gradually begin to recognize what has been in front of us all
along. We see the fractured nature of the ego’s world and how it
pulls and pushes us through the everyday experiences of life.
We discover why we are stressed by a situation where someone
else doesn’t seem to even notice that it exists. We come to see
that we really are individuals, that no two of us are exactly alike.
Our thoughts, feelings and perceptions are all different, even
given the same external circumstances.
As we come to recognize the various parts of our
personality, we gradually uncover the inner nature of the spirit
within. This is the part that was hidden, and through the process
of self discovery, becomes revealed. As we learn more about the
spirit within, we see in it the answer to life’s question, “Is this all
there is?” The body and the ego that results are limited and
temporal. The spirit within is unlimited and eternal. But until we
actually begin the process of self discovery, the inner world
10
remains hidden. The ego tells us, “Go out into the world and find
the answer – seek and you will find!” But the answer is not “out
there”, it is within.
11
Also emanating from Egypt were the Gnostics, a direct
outreach program of the mystery school system. So there were
three main religious factions working the area of Judea at the
time of Jesus (the Pharisees and Sadducees being branches of
Judaism). The questions being asked were designed to clarify
which of these religious factions were being represented. The
differences may not be as clear as we might think, for the three
systems are inter-related. The Torah, for example, was used by
all three systems. Strict rules for fasting, prayer, alms and diet
are part of the Judaic religion, being slightly relaxed with the
Essenes, and significantly different with the Gnostics. The
answers given by Jesus in saying #14 clearly identify his
teachings with the Gnostics.
Jesus said, “Do not tell lies, and do not do what you
hate, for all things are plain in the sight of heaven.” The ego
seeks all the advantages it can find in the world. It learns early
on in childhood that there are some advantages to lying and
doing things that you really don’t want to do. Women especially
are encouraged by the images and expectations of modern
society to do things that they would rather not do, and present
themselves in ways they are really not comfortable with for the
sake of appearances and relationships. These things have a
costly internal toll on our self image and self respect. The cost is
already too high if we consider only the ego or personality, but as
we factor in the emerging spirit, the inner conflict can become
severe.
The process of spiritual growth not only requires, but
also demands honesty and truthfulness within. Indeed, no true
spiritual growth can take place when it is based on any kind of
falsehood. A true spiritual path is, above all else, a quest for
truth. In continuing lies for the advancement in financial or social
and political conditions, we are undermining and destroying the
spirit within. We are sacrificing the eternal for the temporal.
We think that how we feel on the inside, or what we
privately believe about ourselves or others, does not, and will
not, show on the outside. Watch the eyes and facial features of
people around you. With a little practice you will see what is
going on in their lives. It has been said that people live lives of
quiet desperation. You will discover that this is true; you can see
it in their faces. Once you recognize the quiet desperation in
others, the day will come when you see it in your own face in the
mirror. This is our legacy in the world of the ego; none will
12
escape. All of the hidden feelings, beliefs, guilt and pain are
painted on our faces for all to see.
The only workable answer is to abandon the ego and its
ways in favor of the spirit. Methodically replacing each falsehood
with truth, each condemnation with forgiveness, each injury with
kindness, each hate with compassion, and each fear with love
transforms the inner experience from desperation to joy. This too
becomes painted on our face. Peace, love and joy are the
hallmarks of real spiritual growth and there is no way to hide
them from others.
Spiritual truths will also begin coming to us. There is no
spiritual mystery which we cannot know. The closer we come to
God, the more of the spiritual mysteries and principles we will
encounter. All the Father has is given to the Son. There is no
spiritual truth which will not be revealed to us. Piece by piece,
step by step, the whole will be revealed. Once we reach this
100% full conscious contact with God we will have access to
every spiritual truth and principle. Nothing will remain hidden.
13
the hidden animal nature that establishes territory and pecking
orders, domination, submission and control. This is the lion, the
beast, the hidden controller of our lives.
As we examine the actual performance of our society we
can come to the conclusion that we are still a barbaric people
with a thin veneer of civility. The crimes we commit against each
other, the injustices we allow, the adoration of the predators
among us, and the disgust for the poor and downtrodden are all
primary indicators of the ego at work. Competition, the survival of
the fittest - these are the rally cries of the ego. War is the
ultimate competition, where we really do bury the opposition.
We need to ask. Is there another way, a better way? And
if there is, what needs to be done to accomplish it? This is what
the spiritual path ostensibly offers: the higher path of cooperation
in place of competition, respect in place of control, and
compassion in place of condemnation and conflict. So how do
we change the world into that kinder, gentler place? The answer
is that we must begin by changing ourself first. We can change
nothing else until we have become transformed, and then, by
teaching the same process of transformation to others, we can
extend our experience out into the world, changing it at the most
fundamental level, one person at a time.
Transformation will happen to us, either through the ego
by default, or through the spirit by choice and dedication.
Knowing that choices need to be made, and knowing what the
outcomes of those choices are, become the essential factors for
making informed decisions. Many times we cannot know these
factors, but, here, we are more fortunate; these choices have
been made before by many people, and the results are available
for us to examine.
If we allow the ego and its animal nature to rule our lives
we will be consumed by its desires and obsessions, ultimately
left empty because the fires of the ego consume the soul as fire
consumes its fuel. Being consumed by this lion is the curse of
mankind.
Yet there are those, like Jesus, who have taken a
different path, and in doing so, have experienced something
extraordinary, and they have tried to share that experience with
others. They have told us that they have found eternal life, and
have come into the full and complete presence of God. We
marvel at the things they tell us and wonder if it could really be
true. We have been deceived before and are now wary of such
claims. Do we believe them or not?
14
In the outer form of religion the person having this
extraordinary experience is transformed into a savior, and
believing in this savior brings salvation. But in the inner form we
become transformed, and that transformation becomes our
salvation. Belief is not required, just hard work and dedication.
The real question becomes, do we believe the teacher and
understand the teaching enough to actually begin the process of
transformation? Do we dare follow Jesus and become like him,
or do we take the path of little or no risk and just believe?
The problem in simply believing is that the ego is still in
control of our lives. We are still consumed by the lion. Only by
going through the transformational process is the animal nature
within removed from empowerment, taken apart, and consumed.
This transformation that Jesus teaches dissolves the ego and
empowers the spirit, bringing us into the same extraordinary
experience He is having. Do we dare live in the presence of
God? Do we really want to be blessed, or are we more
comfortable being cursed? These are difficult questions, but it is
necessary to answer them before the transformational process
can begin.
15
But this is a wise fisherman, and it is his wisdom which
allows him to perceive the really great idea among the rest. With
wisdom we can select the great idea without difficulty. So how do
we get wisdom? There was a comment about this making its way
around the internet. It said, “Wisdom comes on the arm of age,
but sometimes age comes alone.” In many cultures the elders
are considered wise. So does this mean that we have to wait
until we are old? As we can discern for ourselves, age alone is
not a grantor of wisdom. So what is?
Wisdom is a function of understanding tempered by
experience. In life we have come to see the value of education,
and the knowledge that can be gained through learning. Once
we “complete” our education we begin our career and put our
knowledge to work for us. It is through the application of
knowledge that we gain understanding, and the re-evaluation of
our understandings based on new insights brings experience.
Wisdom, like spiritual growth, is the result of a process. But
processes are like ideas; the world is full of them. Again, how do
we know?
The subject of wisdom and how to acquire it is a
repetitive theme in the Gospel of Thomas. We will explore it in
more depth in sayings 21, 28, 34, 43, and 45.
(9) Jesus said, “Now the sower went out, took a handful
(of seeds), and scattered them. Some fell on the
road; the birds came and gathered them up. Others
fell on rock, did not take root in the soil, and did not
produce ears. And others fell on thorns; they
choked the seed(s) and worms ate them. And others
fell on good soil and produced good fruit; it bore
sixty per measure and a hundred and twenty per
measure.”
16
People process this new information or concept in
several ways, depending on “where they are coming from” in
their attitude, belief system or general consciousness. Most
people are committed to the mainstream consensus of thought.
This is represented by the “road”, which is well traveled. In some
versions of the sower parable this is a path instead of a road.
The connotation is essentially the same; it is where most of the
people travel: mainstream thought. If the seeds, the information
or concept presented, are not “mainstream” then there is no
place for the idea to take root, to be accepted. The defense
mechanisms of the mind are represented by the birds. Anything
not conforming to the mainstream point of view is attacked and
removed from the mind and consciousness. The established
order must be maintained.
Some of the seeds fell on rocks. Rocks are firmly held
beliefs. This is common in strictly religious people. The new idea
is in conflict with the established doctrine, and because of the
firmly held beliefs, there is no room for the new idea or
information to take root - to be accepted.
Some seeds fell on thorns. Thorns are competing ideas.
The ego, being of the earth cannot tell the difference between a
false idea and a true one. They all appear to have at least equal
value, or in many cases, the false ideas are structured to be
more attractive to the ego than is the truth. The true path
requires work and dedication and persistent effort to produce
results. False paths generally require only acceptance of the
ideas, or professed belief in the doctrine presented.
Each of us has had at least some experience with this.
Who among us, when faced with something which is perceived
as a lot of work, has not asked “isn’t there an easier way; a
shortcut?” Each false path is presented as a “shortcut”, a quick
easy way of accomplishing the same thing. In our experience of
the way things work in the world, “if it sounds too good to be
true”, then there is cause to be more than a little suspicious.
Many people spend their lives looking for the “shortcut” in
everything. In the end they have nothing. The wise among us
realize that real success comes from hard work and dedication to
our goals, not shortcuts. The “easy” way is to do it right the first
time, so you don’t have to do it over and over again. The
competing ideas, the shortcuts, consume all of the time and
energy, leaving nothing for working the true path. The seeds are
thus choked out, and the “worms”, disparaging thoughts and
comments, consume the new idea.
17
Some people have an open mind and are willing to
consider new information and new concepts. Here the seeds fall
on good soil and take root. The ideas are accepted and become
the foundation of a new action plan to produce results. In the
path of spiritual growth this is the beginning of the work of self
discovery and the transformation that will follow. The mature
spiritual individual and the effect that individual has on others
around them is represented by the good fruit. The transformed
individual becomes love-based, treating everyone with respect,
gentleness, and kindness. The loving nature of this individual
touches the minds and hearts of others, and in their quest to be
of service to others, the overall quality of life in the community is
improved. This individual enters into the extraordinary
experience of living in the presence of God and everything
around them responds in kind.
(10) Jesus said, “I have cast fire upon the world, and
see, I am guarding it until it blazes.”
18
We have become familiar, at least to a degree, with the
“fire in the belly” from some motivational speakers. It is a phrase
descriptive of a burning desire to accomplish a specific goal. This
burning desire is a function of the ego and is instrumental in
creating success in business, politics and other endeavors in the
world. There is a spiritual counterpart: the awakened spirit within.
It, too, burns within, but its attention is not on accomplishing the
things of the world; rather it is focused on becoming one with
God and everything else. As the transformational experience
progresses, the spirit within becomes stronger and the light of
the divine flame expands. This inner light of living in the
presence of God is exceptionally moving to people when they
come into contact with it and it was the attraction of Zen.
Christianity also has an inner teaching and tradition, and
the effect is identical. The teachings of Jesus, when understood
from the inner perspective, lead us on that inner journey of self-
discovery and spiritual growth. Awakening the spirit, feeding it
from the love-based emotions that we can all generate, and
raising it up to a position of power and authority in our lives
expands the inner light, embeds us in the Kingdom of Heaven,
and places us firmly in the presence of God. The light of spirit
and the love which comes from God, flowing through us out into
the world, is the fire Jesus has cast upon the world.
This fire of spiritual light and love does not come
overnight. It is the result of the inner journey of self-discovery
and spiritual growth. It is the outer sign of the transformational
process within, a process that takes time, effort and dedication.
This is why the fire must by guarded until it blazes. It does not
happen on its own; it is the result of a great deal of inner work,
guided by a true spiritual teacher who can nurture and guide the
mind and heart as they come together with the spirit to form an
inner trinity. Once a person has progressed to a higher level of
understanding in the transformational process, the world can no
longer trample the inner flame. Then, it is safe to let the light
shine. That person becomes a guiding light for others, spreading
the fire which Jesus cast upon the world so many years ago.
19
(11) Jesus said, “This heaven will pass away, and
the one above it will pass away. The dead are not
alive, and the living will not die. In the days when
you consumed what is dead, you made it what is
alive. When you come to dwell in the light, what will
you do? On the day when you were one you became
two. But when you become two, what will you do?”
20
light of Spirit, but once we have come to dwell in the light, then
what do we do? Everything has changed. The goals and desires
we had in the world are no more. We are now connected with
God and all of God’s creation, lovingly attached to other people
as we see the spirit within each of them. Most shocking about
this new connectedness is how other people can exist in this
vast ocean of God, like fish in the sea, and be unaware of its
existence.
Again the question, “What will you do?” needs to be
answered. In the letter of James (RSV) 2:14-17 James says,
“What does it profit, my brethren, if a man says he has faith but
has no works? Can his faith save him? If a brother or sister is ill-
clad and in lack of daily food, and one of you says to them, ‘Go
in peace, be warmed and filled,’ without giving them the things
needed for the body, what does it profit? So faith by itself, if it
has no works, is dead.”
The ego sees others as separate, and competing with us
for limited goods and services. It is justified in paying lip service
to others but not in giving of ourselves to improve the conditions
of someone else without receiving something in return. The spirit
sees others as brothers and sisters, as part of the connected
whole, where when one is diminished the whole is diminished.
“What will you do” calls us into action, not just because it is the
right thing to do, but because the emerging state of love and
compassion within us compels us to improve the quality of life of
others in whatever way we can.
Jesus, in Matthew 25:35-40 (RSV) is trying to teach the
disciples about how our changed state changes our level of
action and responsibility. He states, “for I was hungry and you
gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a
stranger and you welcomed me, I was naked and you clothed
me, I was sick and you visited me, I was in prison and you came
to me.” Then the righteous will answer him, “Lord, when did we
see thee hungry and feed thee, or thirsty and give thee drink?
And when did we see thee a stranger and welcome thee, or
naked and clothe thee? And when did we see thee sick or in
prison and visit thee?” And the king will answer them, “Truly, I
say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brethren,
you did it to me.”
The ego, in its separation, will not extend itself to truly
care for others. Only the spirit, functioning from oneness is
compelled to act, to make a difference in the lives of others. For
many people, what they really want out of their lives is to make a
21
difference. The ego sees that difference as something great and
profound, something that changes the course of human history.
Because the perceived task is monumental, very few even try.
But the spirit sees the small ways to make a difference in the
world, by making a small difference in an individual life. If each of
us would do only one thing to improve the quality of life for one
person, even if only for a short period of time, the world as we
know it would be transformed overnight.
Once we understand that it is the small, personal things
that really make a difference in life, we have opened the door to
the means of changing the world. It is the deeper understanding
of our selves (self-discovery) that opens us up to understanding
others. While we can share what we have with others, we soon
learn that the most important thing we have is our connection
with God. And this is something that can be taught, in essence
given away without diminishing anyone. In fact, the more we
share our experiences and insights, the greater the blessings
become.
We feel compelled to talk to other people about our
experience and convince them to go through this process and
enter the oneness for themselves. After alienating a number of
friends and relatives through our enthusiasm, we realize that
something different must be done to bring this experience to
others. With a deeper understanding of human nature we learn
to adopt the method of planting “seeds” and evaluating which
people are open-minded enough to receive more information and
ideas. As we go through this learning curve we gradually make
the transition from student to teacher, sharing the information,
concepts and experiences with others on a regular basis.
Through our education and transformation, our past
perceptions of heaven give way and are replaced by personal
experiences and individual spiritual insights. Over time these
initial experiences and insights are again replaced with deeper
understanding and wisdom. We clearly see it is spirit that is the
source of all life. The body is not alive separate from the spirit,
and the living spirit will not die.
22
(12) The disciples said to Jesus, “We know that you
will depart from us. Who is to be our leader? Jesus
said to them, “Wherever you are, you are to go to
James the righteous, for whose sake heaven and
earth came into being.”
23
(13) Jesus said to His disciples, “Compare me to
someone and tell Me whom I am like.” Simon Peter
said to Him, “You are like a righteous angel.”
Matthew said to Him, “You are like a wise
philosopher.” Thomas said to Him, “Master, my
mouth is wholly incapable of saying whom You are
like.” Jesus said, “I am not your master. Because
you have drunk, you have become intoxicated from
the bubbling spring which I have measured out.”
And He took him and withdrew and told him three
things. When Thomas returned to his companions,
they asked him, “What did Jesus say to you?”
Thomas said to them, “If I tell you one of the things
which He told me, you will pick up stones and throw
them at me; a fire will come out of the stones and
burn you up.”
24
In the 1960’s there was a popular song containing the
phrase “First there is a mountain, then there is no mountain, then
there is.” This is a description of the general stages in this
process of inner transformation. “First there is a mountain”
recognizes the external structure of power and authority. As
children, we are subject to the authority of our parents, teachers
and others. As we become adults, we are still subject to others:
our boss at work, law enforcement and other facets of the social
structure. For most people this pattern of external power and
authority does not change significantly. But for a person going
through the inner transformation of spiritual growth the
experience is quite different. The outer power structure is
actually ego-based and ego-oriented. As the ego is dismantled
through the process of self-discovery and self-examination, the
external mountain of power and authority is dismantled along
with it. We come to a place in our growth where “there is no
mountain.”
Having no mountain is a disorienting time. The usual
guidelines of our worldly experience have lost their relevance;
we are in essentially uncharted territory. This is where a true
spiritual teacher makes all the difference. The teacher has been
through the entire process before and can act as an effective
guide along the journey to oneness with God and creation. This
is where Thomas is; he has no mountain. The spirit within him
has awakened and can now perceive the spiritual power and
nature of Jesus, but he still lacks enough experience to put these
perceptions in perspective. Thomas feels disoriented - lost. He
sees, but he can’t relate.
In the process of spiritual growth we gradually build a
very personal relationship with God that is profoundly different
from our worldly relationship. In the world, God is the ultimate
power and authority figure - someone to be worshiped, feared
and obeyed. It is similar in some respects to the relationship
between parent and child. As we grow in the world and become
parents ourselves, the relationship with our own parents
changes. The love remains as does the respect, but the power
and authority of the parent has dissolved. We relate more as two
adults rather than parent and child. The same pattern is present
in spiritual growth; we relate to God more as mature spiritual
beings rather than parent and child. The basic structure is still
there but the form of the relationship has changed.
25
The spiritual power and authority is rebuilt within instead
of being outside of us. Now there is a mountain again; our
perceptions have been placed within a new set of values and
perspectives. Instead of the world as reference, the inner
experience of the presence of God has become the reference for
everything in our life. We have become spirit centered rather
than ego centered. Our consciousness has been shifted from the
temporary existence of the ego to the permanent existence of
our spirit. We have crossed the bridge from death into eternal
life. Separation has been left behind and we have entered into
oneness.
Jesus tells Thomas, “I am not your master.” The
relationship has changed; Thomas is growing and in time he will
mature and become like Jesus. Thomas has drunk from the
bubbling spring of spirit and has become “intoxicated” –
disoriented, the result of having no mountain. Thomas is now
ready for more information, a deeper meaning, and a greater
insight. Now Jesus can build on the level of understanding
present in Thomas. The foundation of spiritual understanding
has been laid and now the full structure of spiritual knowledge
can be built. What Jesus tells Thomas is considered blasphemy
by the outer form of religion, the penalty for which is being
stoned to death.
Here is how it works between the outer form and the
inner experience of religion. In the outer form you can believe,
you can worship, but you can’t become. In the inner experience
there is only becoming. Jesus didn’t ask us to worship him, he
asked us to follow him - to become as he has become.
Thomas has learned that God is present in all things,
even rocks and stones, and that God is not to be feared. But he
has not yet learned that God is only love. There is still some ego
left in Thomas for he still believes that God will harm others. He
knows that he is safe, but he has not expanded that concept
enough to include everyone.
26
(14) Jesus said to them, “If you fast, you will give
rise to sin for yourselves; and if you pray, you will
be condemned; and if you give alms, you will do
harm to your spirits. When you go into any land and
walk about in the districts, if they receive you, eat
what they will set before you, and heal the sick
among them. For what goes into your mouth will not
defile you, but that which issues from your mouth –
it is that which will defile you.”
27
from God, flowing through us as it makes its way into the world.
This is the activity of spirit: to help, to heal and to improve the
general quality of life without adding a burden in the process.
The ultimate action of the spirit is to liberate, not to oppress.
Jesus reminds his disciples that it is what comes out of
their mouths that defiles them. What we say is a direct function
of the things that are going on inside of us. Our thoughts,
feelings, prejudices and attitudes are all reflected in the words
we choose, the inflection of our voice, our body language and
our actions. Just as some people will lie, some will seek to
deceive using these modes of communication. But the truth will
always come to the surface. People will eventually reveal their
true inner selves. Then the substance of the inner-self will
become clear. The ego will show itself with its ugly desires, or
the spirit will shine with the light of God’s pure love.
(15) Jesus said, “When you see one who was not
born of woman, prostrate yourselves on your faces
and worship him. That one is your Father.”
28
eventually come to the point where one day we look in the mirror
and we see the spirit within ourself. In essence, this is the point
of the entire exercise: getting us to come face-to-face with the
fact that we are spiritual beings – not just in theory, but in reality.
This is actually one of the disturbing realizations
discussed in saying (2). Once the reality of our spiritual self
begins to sink into our conscious mind, we are compelled to face
the fact that almost everything we have been taught in the world
may be wrong. A detailed, extensive self-inventory is required,
and through this inner process of examining each of our
assumptions and conclusions about ourself, each other, the
world in which we live and our relationship with each other and
God, we come to a new and unified perception of who and what
we really are. We are then transformed from a human having a
spiritual experience to a spiritual being having a human
experience. The shift is profound. We have become spirit based
rather than ego-based. We were lost, and now are found; blind,
and now we see.
29
birth also changes the family dynamics. We grow up in an
environment over which we have little control, and due to our
lack of experience, little understanding. Our mind seeks to make
sense out of what is happening around us, and because we have
no real base of experience and understanding, our conclusions
are for the most part defective, incomplete, or just plain wrong.
The classic example of this is the child deciding that the divorce
of the parents is the child’s fault.
The underlying principle is that the majority of our life
decisions are based on assumptions and conclusions about life,
relationships and ourselves which were made when we were
children. If you want to see the impact this can have in your life,
imagine a six-year-old making all of your decisions for you. As
ridiculous as this may sound, it is not far from the truth. Our
decisions as adults are formed around, and by, the perceptions
we made as children. We come to conclusions and points of
view at various times in our childhood, most of which never get
reviewed in later adulthood. Our lack of experience and
understanding in childhood becomes the formative factor in our
perspectives and perceptions as adults. If we never re-examine
the basis of our beliefs and actions, we never really mature.
Home is supposed to be a place of safety, refuge and
peace, and yet it is the scene of private torment, conflict, and
struggle for power and control. Family dynamics are generally
anything but peaceful. When there are five in a house we
generally think of two adults and three children. So the theme of
two against three is generational: parents against the children.
This premise is supported with the father against the son, and
the son against the father. We must remember that this is an
inner teaching; so while there are outer counterparts, the focus
must remain on the inner experience. It is not the conflict in the
family that we must resolve; it is the resulting inner conflict within
each of us which is disrupting our lives that needs resolution.
Indeed, once the inner conflict is resolved within the parents, the
conflict within the family ceases.
This inner conflict is the direct result of the traumas,
programming and imprinting which we received as children. It is
necessary for us, as adults, to re-evaluate all of our assumptions
and conclusions in life, bringing them into our full conscious
awareness so we may see them for what they really are. Since
traumas are the most destructive, we can reap the greatest
benefits by working on them first. The fundamental factor is two-
fold: first, some things just happen; accidents happen, people
30
die, parents get divorced, careers are lost, and people become
disabled. None of these things are directly attributable to us as a
child. Life is not fair; it was never supposed to be fair. It is as it is.
Second, many people will act out of their own pain, inflicting that
pain on others. It is not necessary for you to have done
something wrong; all you need to be is an available target. The
classic statement of the persecutor is, “I wouldn’t have to hurt
you if you didn’t make it necessary.” It is the victim’s fault that the
persecutor is out of control.
People really are doing the best they can do, and yes,
their best is sometimes extremely poor. The reality is that many
people live their lives in turmoil and emotional pain, and their
outer actions are but a reflection of that inner state. While we
cannot change other people, we can change ourselves and we
can establish a state of inner peace and serenity for ourselves.
The process of spiritual growth involves the correction of past
perceptions, conclusions, and emotional reactions. The
correction is two-fold; the intellectual understanding must be
changed, and the attached emotional state must also be
changed. The key is to change both of them at the same time.
We can use affirmations to change our thoughts, but if the
emotional counterpart remains, the thought will be regenerated.
We can change the emotional state, but if the intellectual
counterpart (the conclusion) remains, the emotion will be
regenerated. If we deal with both the intellectual and emotional
sides at the same time then the resolution becomes permanent.
Nothing remains to regenerate the other half.
The end result of this inner process is a unification of
self, which is the “solitary” of which Jesus is speaking. The result
is the complete surrender of the ego and its absorption into the
authority of the spirit. As long as the ego remains, we are
divided, living in a world of duality. Becoming spirit centered and
dismantling the ego renders us solitary and able to enter into the
oneness. It’s all part of the same process of becoming one with
God and all of creation. We will discuss this concept more in
sayings 22, 23, 49, 55, 75, and 101.
31
(17) Jesus said, “I shall give you what no eye has
seen and what no ear has heard and what no hand
has touched and what has never occurred to the
human mind.”
32
People want to know what is going to happen to them.
We want to know if there is a life after death, or if this is all there
is. Jesus not only understands how life works, but also
understands how the spirit works. The spirit exists first; it is the
beginning. In the beginning was God, and from the substance of
God we were produced. Nothing else in the universe needed to
exist, just God, and then us. This is the beginning, the alpha.
Physical life is a vehicle, a means of having the experiences we
call life, a school where we can learn and grow into maturity.
Once the need for the school has been met, we set the physical
body aside; it is no longer needed. We take the lessons learned,
the understanding and the wisdom with us. The mature spirit
then has everything it needs; it is the omega, the end.
Once we make the shift from being ego-centered to
being spirit-centered, we can shift our perceptions from the
temporary nature of the body to the eternal nature of the spirit.
By attaching our consciousness to the spirit, rather than the ego,
we will not experience the death of consciousness. When the
work of the body is done, we will set it aside; it will die, but our
consciousness will not. We will continue on in full consciousness
and awareness. In the Book of Revelation, where Jesus states
he is the alpha and the omega, the beginning and the end, he is
demonstrating that his consciousness is fully attached and
associated with the spirit within. He is experiencing eternity here
and now, and he is showing us how we can, too, by becoming
spirit-centered and attaching our consciousness to our spirit
instead of our ego.
33
centered to spirit-centered life and not experience death. While
“Blessed is he who came into being before he came into being”
may seem confusing, it refers to the spirit as described above.
The comment of stones ministering to us will be addressed in
saying #77.
The mystery school system was originally designed to
impart the knowledge of spiritual existence, the raising up of the
spirit to a position of power and authority in our life, bringing us
fully and completely into that experience. It didn’t take long for
the remains of the ego to creep into the mystery school
teachings and corrupt the pure spiritual essence of its message.
The teaching soon was reserved for the elite, the socially and
politically connected. The rest of humanity was considered
“unclean” or “unwashed”. The second meaning of “esoteric” then
comes into play – meant for the few. The focus of the mystery
school then moved from the practice of spiritual growth to the
keeping of the knowledge or “secret”.
In keeping this spiritual knowledge secret mankind has
been relegated to a life of suffering without knowing why. Without
the spiritual knowledge, the suffering of mankind cannot be
overcome, so the suffering continues without end. Jesus
recognized the inherent injustice in keeping the spiritual
information secret and violated the order of secrecy. Jesus
began teaching all who showed an interest and guided anyone,
male or female, through the spiritual process and into the
presence of God. This violation of secrecy led to his execution.
Jesus was not only teaching the secret knowledge, but
also was teaching the practice of spiritual exercises designed to
bring the presence of God into fruition. Knowledge without
practical application is useless. The goal of this book is to share
not only knowledge, but also practical methods so the
information can be applied and the end result achieved. While
the knowledge resides in the Torah, the practical method can be
expressed in five other practices. Fulfilling our own inner needs
opens the door to our spirituality. Those inner needs are:
protecting our self, caring for our self, valuing our self, respecting
our self and loving our self.
We have been trained to seek the fulfillment of those
inner needs by manipulating the behavior of others, getting them
to do these things for us. After all, how can you feel loved if there
is no one there to love you? The reality is no one can make you
feel loved, valued, cared for, respected or protected if you
choose not to feel that way. Consider the man which falls madly
34
in love with a woman. She has no attraction to, or desire to be
with him. Is she loved? Yes! Does she feel loved? No! The man
is a pest; she just wants him to go away. What we can learn from
this is that even though we have learned to manipulate others,
their action, and inevitable lack of action, is not going to fulfill our
inner needs no matter what we do.
Let’s look at another example. If we line up 100 people,
and each person except one in the line tells us that we are a
good person, who are we going to believe; the 99, or the one?
Most of us are going to believe the one because they confirm the
thoughts and feelings we have about ourselves. It is not about
the views of other people, it is about the validation of what we
think and feel about ourselves, and this internal reference
controls how we feel, not the actions of another person. This is
also what keeps us separated from God and all of creation.
Only by changing the internal reference, what we think
and how we feel about ourselves, can we change our experience
in life. It is up to us to develop respect for ourself, care about
ourself, value ourself, protect ourself, and ultimately love ourself.
Nothing else will work. Does this mean that we must become
selfish? No, of course not. It means that we must stop
manipulating other people and do for ourselves what needs to be
done. We are responsible, not for the events in our lives, but for
the effect those events have on us. We, not random or even
intentional external events, determine what we think and how we
feel. In taking responsibility for our thoughts and feelings, we
remove a large part of the “mountain” that exists outside of us
and move it within. We become the power and authority in our
lives, not someone or something “out there”.
At the same time, this moving of the power and authority
from the outside to the inside does not mean we need to use that
power to control another person; that’s what got us into this
problem in the first place. Power and authority are meant for
each of us to control ourselves, not others. This is the power of
autonomy – the power to control ourself. It is the ego which
desires to control everything, but not itself. The spirit is into
autonomy.
35
(20) The disciples said to Jesus, “Tell us what the
Kingdom of Heaven is like.” He said to them, “It is
like a mustard seed, the smallest of all seeds. But
when it falls on tilled soil, it produces a great plant
and becomes a shelter for birds of the sky.”
36
in kindness and gentleness. As such our compassion and
humility become a welcome shelter for those around us. The
greater our love, compassion and humility become, the greater
the shelter we provide.
37
Family and friends are usually the first to challenge us
about our new beliefs. They have an interest in keeping us the
same as we have always been. If we remain the same, or revert
back to the same position, we validate what they believe about
us and themselves. But if we change, then we are in effect
challenging what others believe about themselves; questioning
the status quo. This is why we are challenged in return: others
feel threatened when we change, and the greater the change,
the greater the challenge. Some people, when challenged in this
way, abandon the new ideas and practices never to return. For
those who persist, a change in beliefs also results in a change in
friends and family relationships. Some will become closer, many
will become more distant. It is all part of the process of growth.
Knowing that these challenges will come, we can
prepare ourselves. “If the master of the house knows that the
thief is coming, he will begin his vigil before he comes and will
not let him dig through into his house of his domain to carry away
his goods.” So knowing that others will challenge our new ideas
and concepts, we must begin preparing ourselves well in
advance so we will not revert back into the old destructive
patterns of thoughts, feelings and behaviors. We must not let the
opinions of others add strength to the limiting and debilitating
thoughts and feelings which we are trying to eliminate. We
cannot allow others to continue validating the destructive
patterns in our lives. We can do this by first limiting our time and
associations with people who are not of like mind. Secondly, we
can discount the comments these people make by
understanding that they are acting out of their own pain, and not
in consideration of us or our needs. We do not want them taking
away our progress, “carrying away our goods.”
“You then be on guard against the world. Arm
yourselves with great strength, lest the robbers find a way to
come to you, for the difficulty which you expect will surely
materialize.” This is the way the world works: when we challenge
the status quo we are attacked to bring us back into line, back
into submission. The old patterns of thought and belief are not
easily replaced with the new. It is up to each of us to strengthen
our resolve and protect the new ideas and practices until they
take firm root in us, until we actually own the experience and
become secure in our new consciousness.
“Let there be amongst you a man of understanding!
When the grain ripened, he came quickly with his sickle in hand
and he reaped.” Inherent in this process is a matter of timing.
38
Like the parables of the fisherman and the pearl merchant, once
we recognize that we have a workable path into the presence of
God, we need to act. It does not take long for the world or our
own ego to talk us out of doing what we need to do. Our interest
strays and moves on to other things. In doing so, the opportunity
to enter the Kingdom of Heaven passes and we remain in the
world. If we clearly understand that the opportunity must be
taken when it appears to us, just as grain must be harvested
when it is ripe, then we will act and we will enter into the new
consciousness.
39
When we become angry, we play out the actions and
attitudes we have observed in others. We often use the same
words, intonation and body language one of our parents used in
the past. The power of imprinting is very strong. We are mostly
unaware of its existence; let alone how deeply it has affected our
life. All of the reactions we have to the many situations in life are
the actions of one or more compartments, acquired through
trauma, programming or imprinting. So very little of us is actually
original, that once the personality is understood, our behavior
can be predicted in advance to a very high degree of certainty.
This is what profiling does and why it is used to help track down
criminals. We really have become creatures of habit.
The transformative nature of spiritual growth identifies
the individual compartments, breaks down the buffer, allowing us
to “see” the true nature and source of this piece of our
personality, and provides the means of integrating it into a new
“whole”. This is the underlying practice for what Jesus is
describing. The end result of this process is a unified
consciousness. We sometimes refer to such an individual as
being “genuine”, meaning they are the same in private as they
are in public – there is no act which is put on to impress other
people. This unification of self is necessary before we can enter
into the Kingdom of Heaven.
40
(24) His disciples said to Him, “Show us the place
where You are, since it is necessary for us to seek
it.” He said to them, “Whoever has ears, let him hear.
There is light within a man of light, and he lights up
the whole world. If he does not shine, he is
darkness.”
41
of true spiritual mastery. There is much more going on in the
history of these religious figures than we have been led to
believe.
The living light of spirit is real and a true spiritual master
does shine. The living light of spirit shines in a halo around the
head, like the corona around the sun. This is the highest
expression of spiritual power on earth; it is the highest level of
the life force, the crown of life.
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The ego looks out into the world and judges it good or
bad. It has no incentive to examine itself, for the one who judges
must always be superior to what is being judged. In the process
of judging others it is easy to find fault, diminishing the value of
anyone who would compete against us in the world.
The spiritual path is the journey of self discovery. This
entails the exploration of all of our inner qualities, faults included,
with the intent of resolving all of our inner conflicts. This process
leads to the unification of the self and removes the blocks to our
awareness and clears our perceptions. It is only when we see
others through the eyes of the love which comes from God that
we see them clearly, the way God sees them. Only then are we
truly in a position to help them. How can we give something
which we do not have? How can we guide someone on a path
we are not walking? The simple reality is that we cannot. Our
growth must be well along in its progress before we can guide
others. We must be well established in love before we see others
as true children of God. Before we can show others what we
really are, we must become our real self.
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We have come to know that we eat food, drink water,
and breathe air, and our bodies use these basic components to
create the energy we need to move our muscles and do the
physical and mental activities which fill our days. What we don’t
know is that the body is a biological energy transformation
machine. It is capable of creating a number of different specific
forms of energy, not just the form needed by the muscles,
organs and brain. The body produces a form of emotional energy
which matches the energy requirements of the ego. This form of
emotion is fear or pride-based and is something we normally
associate with negative emotions. Fear, hate, anger, guilt, envy,
bitterness, resentment, lust and shame are emotions in this
class. These are the emotions which feed the ego. Every time
we express or experience these emotions the ego is being fed,
becoming stronger and more in control of our lives.
The spirit needs a different form of energy than the ego.
The spirit feeds on the positive emotions of love, compassion,
caring, gentleness, kindness, respect and support. The crux of
the issue is that the body will produce only one of these forms at
a time. As we have spent most of our life experiencing the
emotions which feed the ego, the ego has grown very strong.
The spirit, which has not been fed, has lapsed into a deep sleep,
like a state of hibernation. This is where the concept of
awakening applies to the spirit. We must awaken the spirit from
its deep sleep before it can be raised up and empowered. So
how do we awaken our spirit? We start feeding it. We make a
conscious decision and effort to experience only positive, loving
emotions.
Is this a practical approach? Well, yes and no. Will
experiencing positive emotions awaken the spirit? Yes. Can we
just switch from negative to positive emotions by choosing to do
so? No. Our ego has a very strong interest in keeping us focused
on the emotions which feed it. Without that food, the ego will
weaken and eventually fall into a deep sleep, just as our spirit
has. This is the fight between the “two wolves” within us, the ego
and the spirit. We decide which will win, by deciding which we
will feed. And we feed one or the other by the emotions we
express and experience. Do not be discouraged when the ego
raises its ugly head and you are thrown back into a negative
emotion. The answer is in being persistent. Return to the loving
emotions as soon as you can. The more love-based emotions
you can experience, the more the spirit within you will grow; and
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the stronger the spirit becomes, the more loving thoughts and
emotions you will experience.
The world runs on negative emotions. A simple review of
the day’s news makes that clear. As long as we indulge in the
emotions which feed the ego, the spirit within cannot grow. We
must stop our indulgence in the negative emotions; we must fast
as regards the world and stop feeding the ego. If we do not stop
feeding the ego, the spirit will not grow and we cannot find the
Kingdom. It’s that simple.
The Sabbath is the traditional day of rest. Here the rest
Jesus is referring to is the same as in saying #2 (Coptic version).
Rest represents the peace of God, that deep abiding peace
which is the hallmark of living in the presence of God. Rest is
also associated with the practice of meditation, the traditional
means of entering into the presence of God for many Eastern
religions. Here the practice focuses on quieting the mind and
bringing it into a state of peace. The key to successful spiritual
growth through meditation is the same as any other spiritual
system: confronting and resolving the disturbances within the
personality or ego. If there is no inner confrontation followed by
resolution, there is no growth.
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the biggest ego around, or you’re nobody. The ego blinds us by
making its focus the outside rather than the inside. The ego is
calling us to go out into the world and find our answers
“somewhere out there”.
The spiritual teacher calls us back to the inner world of
spirit where the presence of God can be found. The problem all
spiritual teachers encounter is the entranced state of people
living under control of the ego. Jesus describes this entranced
state as being intoxicated. He states he found none of them
thirsty. In other words, none of them is seeking true knowledge
and understanding of spiritual things. There is no hunger and
thirst for righteousness, living a spirit-based life in the presence
of God. All true spiritual teachers grieve for the suffering people
experience. The most frustrating part is seeing how the thoughts,
feelings and actions of people create that suffering. People do
not see how the ego manipulates them into emotional pain and
suffering, just so it can get fed. The stronger the ego becomes
the more suffering it creates, either within the self, or in other
people.
Each person is a spiritual being, but without the fullness
and depth of that experience, we are empty and desolate.
Without the spiritual teacher there would be no effective way of
ending the separation from God and the suffering that ensues
from that separation. There is an old story about a wolf and a
flock of sheep. The wolf is having trouble catching the sheep
because the entire flock is very much aware of the wolf and what
the wolf wants. So the flock avoids the wolf, keeping its distance.
The wolf thinks and thinks and finally comes up with a plan. The
wolf hypnotizes the flock and tells them they are no longer
sheep. He tells each sheep, “You are a doctor, you are a
teacher, you are an engineer and you are a lawyer.” As the
sheep go about believing they are these other things, they forget
their real nature and the threat the wolf is to them. The wolf can
now approach the sheep and kill whichever one it wants without
the sheep becoming alarmed.
In this story the wolf represents our ego. The ego keeps
its victims entranced, hypnotized or intoxicated, so they do not
clearly see what it is doing to them. The spiritual teacher shakes
the belief system and attempts to awaken or bring the student
out of the trance or hypnotized state induced by the ego.
Generally only the few will shake off this intoxication of the ego
and repent. The meaning of the word “repent” is not only an act
of contrition, but the changing of one’s mind, and just as
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importantly, to change ones life. To repent is to change the
direction of one’s life: from outer to inner, from ego to spirit, from
separation to oneness.
This is the call which every true spiritual teacher makes:
repent. Change your thoughts, your feelings and your actions.
Turn away from the ego and its incessant focus on suffering,
manipulation and control. Change your life by changing your
consciousness. The presence of God is everywhere, in and of
everything, at all times. It is only our state of consciousness
which limits our awareness, and we can change that. We can
grow in awareness, knowledge, understanding and wisdom. We
can awaken the spirit within, grow and mature into the pure
spiritual being God created us to be. We are limited only by our
lack of understanding who and what we really are. You are a
child of God, created out of God substance. Everything God is
and has is yours.
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it can be used in a meaningful way. So who or what “reads” the
DNA? It is this author’s belief that the spirit within us “reads” the
DNA and supervises the construction of the physical body,
following the blueprint created during conception.
On a more philosophical level, the individual spirit needs
the physical body for its development and maturing process. The
body is a biological energy transformation system capable of
producing the specific form of energy needed by the spirit for its
growth. So the flesh (the body) comes into being because of the
spirit. The spirit, being the substance of God, has eternal life. It
has come into existence from pure Spirit, not physical matter.
God has existed from before the creation of the physical
universe. The creator must exist before the creation as a matter
of definition of terms. Just as God is the creator of the physical
universe, so too are we as spiritual beings the creator of our
physical bodies. The creator gives rise to the creation, not the
other way around. This is why Jesus says, “But if the spirit came
into being because of the body, it is a wonder of wonders.” It just
doesn’t work that way.
What is amazing is that the spirit, with its great wealth of
possibilities, ultimately inheriting the full Kingdom of God, has
chosen the limited nature of the physical body for its temporary
home. The key to understanding this choice is the capability of
the physical body to generate the specific form of energy
required for the spirit to grow. Without this energy, the spirit
cannot develop beyond where it currently exists. The
undeveloped spirit is also without full consciousness and
awareness. These, too, are developed during this partnership
with the physical body. So the body is an instrumental tool in the
development of the spirit.
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The Greek version combines part of saying #77 which
we will save for that explanation. It is obvious the first line is at
odds in these two translations, so we will begin with the Greek
version. Always remember esoteric teachings or sayings deal
with inner things, even though they are expressed in outer terms.
“Where there are three they are without God” would be more
clear if it said “where there are three or more they are without
God.”
There is an old story about a man who desires to lead a
spiritual life. His wife has died and his children are grown so he
comes to the temple and asks to enter the spiritual life of a
monk. A teacher at the temple tells him first he must attend
classes which are held once a week outside the entrance to the
temple. So the man starts to attend the classes. After about a
year he comes into the temple and begins explaining to the
master of the temple how he wants to lead a spiritual life and live
with them in the temple. The master interrupts saying, “Stop,
stop, there are too many voices. Go back to class.”
After returning to class the man begins to pay close
attention to anything having to do with voices. He discovers he
says some of the same things his father said when he was a
boy, and he asks the teacher if this is what is meant by voices.
The teacher explains that this is exactly what the master of the
temple was talking about. Within us are many voices which we
have incorporated over the years, and it is necessary for us to
separate these voices and eliminate all voices except the one
true voice which is our real self. After another year of work on
voices the man approaches the master of the temple again and
tries to explain what he wants. The master again interrupts
saying, “Stop, stop, there are still too many voices. Go back to
class.”
Now the man knows he is on the right track. He
discovers he says things his mother used to say, his childhood
friends, his uncle, his aunt, his grandfather, his teachers at
school, his boss where he worked; all of them have had an
impact on him and all have taken a place within his mind. He
began to ask himself, “Who am I, really?” One by one he began
to identify and discard the patterns of speech, the mannerisms,
the attitudes and prejudices of the people in his life. Finally the
day came when he felt he was ready to approach the master
again. This time when he entered the temple he simply went and
stood in front of the master and said nothing. The master looked
49
deeply into his eyes and studied him for several minutes. Finally
the master said, “Not perfect, but better. Now we can begin.”
Within each of us reside the voices, the attitudes and
beliefs of others. We are not just ourselves, we are a mixture of
ourself and many others, each part separate from the others. We
are not unified. God will not enter the crowded room. Only where
we have reduced the voices within to one or two will the spirit
and oneness of God enter. As long as there are three or more
voices, they rule our consciousness and control our lives. The
voices have become our Gods. Where there are three or more
voices, they are (false) Gods. Where there are two or one, the
true spirit and oneness of God can enter.
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goals of basic education. Learning about emotional maturity is
far beyond what we currently can conceive as a society. Some
individuals have seen the need and are trying to raise awareness
about our emotional states, but at this time it exceeds the grasp
of our society. If emotional maturity is beyond our grasp, spiritual
maturity is beyond our comprehension.
For this reason, the rare individual who manages to
mature spiritually is considered a prophet. People who have
known this person before the maturing process has taken place
still think they know them, and they certainly can’t be anything
other than what they were. People always assume that the most
spiritual people have to be from somewhere else; there can’t be
any prophet here, because I know everybody from here. What is
not understood is that everyone is a spiritual being living the life
of a regular person. Anyone who has the desire and knowledge
can grow emotionally and spiritually.
We tend to think that these rare spiritually matured
people are going to be so different from us that we would
instantly recognize them. So what would we look for? Walking on
water or performing miracles? That would certainly make the
recognition easy, but real life is not so simple. You may already
know a spiritually mature person. The most obvious outer signs
are treating everyone with respect, gentleness and kindness.
Spiritually mature people are peaceful, generally happy and non-
confrontational. There is an inner joy and truly loving nature
about them. People find that they like the spiritually mature
person, often without knowing why. Spiritually mature people
stand out, but in ways which we don’t normally expect. When we
meet them for the first time we clearly recognize that something
is very different about them, but if we have known them for
years, our past perceptions about them blind us to their current
level of maturity.
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consciousness becomes strong enough to withstand the criticism
from others in the world which results from becoming spiritually
mature and thus different. The desire to conform is strong in
most people and it takes a certain degree of spiritual maturity to
overcome the need to conform. Once the new consciousness
has been strengthened and fortified, it becomes secure; it will not
fall. But it is also at this point that it cannot be hidden, either. The
change from being ego-based to being spirit-based becomes
obvious.
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(34) Jesus said, “If a blind man leads a blind man,
they will both fall into a pit.”
53
someone’s body language. It can be a sound, smell, texture,
color, taste; anything which triggers a memory within us. An
internal trigger is a memory, usually of an external trigger. It
doesn’t matter whether the trigger is internal or external because
once the process has been triggered, the rest of it is all internal.
Many triggers are pleasant to most of us: the smell of
coffee or of freshly baked bread, fresh cut flowers, a thank you
note. These generally invoke pleasant memories from our past.
But some triggers invoke feelings of guilt, anger, frustration,
hatred, envy and a host of other negative feelings and their
associated thoughts. There is a sequence which follows the
trigger. The first is a feeling. Feelings are faster than thoughts. In
a sequence, feelings and thoughts are connected. The first
feeling is not usually very strong, but it is connected to a thought,
generally a conclusion we have come to about ourself, someone
else, life, or our perception of the relationships involved. The
thought acts as an internal trigger, activating a second emotion
which is related to the first feeling and acts as support for the
developing emotional experience.
A type of ping-pong ball exchange follows where the
feeling is attached to a thought, which acts as an internal trigger
for the next related feeling. The end effect is the building of an
emotional state within, generally negative in nature, where the
ego can gorge itself on the emotional energy produced. The
disruptive consequences to the rest of our life and the lives of
others around us are ignored, at least for the moment. If the
action of the ego has injured someone physically or emotionally,
guilt can always be served as desert; any negative or pride
based emotion will feed the ego. What we are looking for is the
ping-pong ball game, the sequence of feelings and thoughts
which are used to build the negative emotional state.
Keep a small pad or notebook handy for writing down
your observations. In the beginning it is common to go through
the entire emotional sequence before we realize we should have
been observing. Persistence is the key. Don’t beat yourself up
for missing what happened; that can be used to feed the ego, as
well. Just continue to observe how emotional states are
generated. Make a list of emotions which are triggered within you
and their associated thoughts. Many times the ego will indulge in
these emotional feasts when you can’t write them down, for
example, while you are driving a car or are in the middle of doing
something which cannot be interrupted. As soon afterwards as
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you can, write down as much of the feeling / thought pattern as
you can remember.
After about a month of observation you should begin to
recognize a pattern developing in the feeling / thought ping-pong
game. There will be three or four emotional states which the ego
uses to feed itself. As you become more adept at observing, you
will begin to see the triggers which initiate the emotional states.
Once you recognize the triggers you can begin to watch for
them. The negative emotional state can be avoided by breaking
the ping-pong ball sequence, and the earlier in the sequence we
can break the pattern the less the ego gets fed. Not feeding the
ego makes it weak. This is how we bind the hands of the strong
man (the ego), so we can plunder his house (take away the tools
or weapons the ego has been using against us).
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line between what is needed and useful and what is possessed
for the impression it makes on other people. This is why focus is
so important. Are we focusing on our survival and basic comfort,
or are we focusing on elevating our ego and creating separation
between ourselves and others, if only in our mind?
If we are to mature emotionally and spiritually, we must
focus our attention on the things which will heal the separation
and bring us into oneness. Who can defile us? The ego defiles
us. Remember it is not that which goes into the mouth, but that
which proceeds from the mouth which defiles us. For what we
say reflects what is in our heart. The ego acts in its own interest,
out of our lower (negative) emotional base. This defiles us. The
spirit acts in the interest of oneness and healing, out of our
higher, love-based, emotional center. This blesses us and also
blesses all others with whom we come in contact. The ego acts
to increase the separation, thus increasing the pain and suffering
it inflicts on the world. The spirit acts to heal the separation and
bring us into oneness, thus reducing the pain and suffering in the
world. This is the power of focus. This is why our focus is so
important. Reducing the suffering in the world is an altruistic goal
which may have little real meaning to us in our everyday life. But
reducing the suffering we experience individually is much more
rewarding and beneficial to us on a personal level. Suffering is
suffering, and if you stop suffering there is less suffering in the
world, is there not?
He himself will give you your garment. We are also
clothed in our attitude and consciousness. What difference does
it make if people are dressed in expensive clothes when they are
rude and abusive? Clothing does not change who they are. As
we enter into the presence of God and begin functioning from
gentleness, kindness and respect, we become clothed in love. It
is by our loving nature that people recognize us, not by our
clothing. Are we to be people of inner substance or remain
shallow, without character and depth to our being? Living in the
presence of God is the single most powerful and transforming
experience in life. You cannot go through that experience and
not become a beautiful person within.
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(37) His disciples said to him, “When shall you be
revealed to us and when shall we see You?” Jesus
said, “When you strip yourselves without being
ashamed, and take up your garments and place
them under your feet like little children and tread on
them, then will you see the Son of the Living One,
and you will not be afraid.”
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is at this point we begin to see the raised-up spirit clearly. “Then
you will see the Son of the Living One, and you will not be
afraid.” Again, notice the use of upper case letters on “Son” and
“Living One”. “Son” refers to the awakened and raised-up spirit
within. “Living One” is another way of saying the spiritual aspect
of God. Spirit is the source of all life and the “Living One” is
another way of recognizing that source.
We have been well trained to view God in fear. But our
direct experiences with the presence of God gradually teach us
there is nothing to fear. By the time we grow sufficiently to see
the spiritual being within we will have lost our fear of God.
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Jesus, the mystery school system had evolved into a private club
for the elite and politically and socially connected. The actual
teaching of practice and spiritual growth and development of the
spirit within had given way to the protection of “secret”
knowledge. It simply became one more way for people to
separate themselves from one another. The screening for
suitable students had shifted from ability to position in society.
The Pharisees and the scribes became the keepers of
the “secret” knowledge. Because the system was now ego-
based, there was no real interest in practice and becoming; just
in keeping the “secret”. Jesus was of royal birth, and as such,
was granted entry into the mystery school system. Upon
completing the highest initiation and learning the most secret
information, Jesus realized that the secret information was
simply a key to understanding how to awaken, raise, and
empower the spirit within. The real secret wasn’t the information
itself, but the system of practices, or the process, which leads to
spiritual maturity. So in addition to the secret information, Jesus
began teaching the practices needed for spiritual growth. His
teaching of forgiveness was a key element of the process for
spiritual awakening and growth.
The mystery school system taught a well-rounded
system of knowledge in addition to spiritual information.
Mathematics, the sciences, arts and philosophy were all part of
the knowledge base offered by the schools. As in many of the
past centuries, there was little education outside of religious
establishments. To become educated meant becoming part of
the religious system. To be wise as serpents involved entering
and learning the knowledge taught in the mystery school system,
which used the serpent as its symbol, and a sign of its
graduates. To be innocent as doves was to shed the ego and the
false pretenses of societal position and power - something the
usual graduates of the mystery school system did not do. The
gateway to power and influence in the time of Jesus was through
the mystery school system and its club of influential patrons.
Jesus had a different agenda for his students. Learn the
information the system has to offer, but do not get caught up in
the politics and intrigue. Use the knowledge for real spiritual
growth so you can set yourself free from the world and its
entrapments. The knowledge provides the key; the practice
provides the means of inner transformation. Here is the single
most important key to understanding spiritual sayings, principles
and parables. It is always about consciousness.
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(40) Jesus said, “A grapevine has been planted
outside of the Father, but being unsound, it will be
pulled up by the roots and destroyed.”
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faithful servant; you have been faithful over a little, I will set you
over much; enter into the joy of your master.” The one servant,
however, buried the talent, returning it in its original condition.
This servant is punished, and what little he has is taken from him
and given to those who have more.
The inner spiritual meaning is that we are each given
something of great value: the living spirit within. At some point
we will have to demonstrate what we have done with this gift.
Our responsibility is to increase the gift of Spirit, not bury it. The
entire purpose of giving us the gift of the living spirit within, the
substance of God, is so we can multiply that substance. Just as
in the parable of the seeds, the point is to increase the
substance of God, the living spirit, and not let it go to waste. We
are here in this world, with this body, for the purpose of making
the spirit within us grow.
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(43) His disciples said to him, “Who are You, that
You should say these things to us.” Jesus said to
them, “You do not realize who I am from what I say
to you, but you have become like the Jews, for they
either love the tree and hate its fruit, or love the fruit
and hate the tree.”
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(44) Jesus said, “Whoever blasphemes against the
Father will be forgiven, and whoever blasphemes
against the Son will be forgiven, but whoever
blasphemes against the Holy Spirit will not be
forgiven either on earth or in heaven.”
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are not poor helpless sinners who need to be saved; we are the
creators of our life experience. We create our own salvation
through the process of spiritual growth. By taking control of our
thoughts, feelings and actions, we take control of our life. By
steering our consciousness into the presence of God and raising
the level of our consciousness so the experience of that
presence can be maintained, we enter the Kingdom of Heaven. If
we are disrespectful to that presence, it will not come and we will
not experience our salvation.
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(46) Jesus said, “Among those born of woman, from
Adam until John the Baptist, there is no one
superior to John the Baptist that his eyes should not
be lowered before him. Yet I have said, whichever of
you will become a child will know the Kingdom and
will become superior to John.”
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Remember, this is all about consciousness. We cannot
hold on to two different levels of consciousness at the same
time. We cannot be spirit-based and ego-based at the same
time. We have to choose. Which are we going to serve, the spirit
or the ego?
The wine represents our belief system, one new and the
other old. The old belief system is ego-based and the new is
spirit-based. The new beliefs and consciousness cannot be put
into the old belief system without bursting the old system. New
wine is active and expanding; old wine is not. The new spirit-
based consciousness is in the process of expanding and will tear
the old system apart in the process. Nor can the ideas and
practices of the ego be placed within the realm of the spirit, lest it
spoil. The two systems are not compatible. The old patch and
the new garment are the same analogy.
(48) Jesus said, “If two make peace with each other
in this one house, they will say to the mountain,
Move away and it will move away.”
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(49) Jesus said, “Blessed are the solitary and elect,
for you will find the Kingdom. For you are from it,
and to it you will return.”
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main pieces of our personality. The disorientation occurs quickly
and generally goes un-noticed. Once you know what to look for,
with some practice, you will discover the buffers.
It is this fractured nature of our personality which
prevents the presence of God from entering into our life
experience. There is no room, no suitable place for it to be at
home within us. It is up to us to make room. It is like the story of
Joseph and Mary arriving in Bethlehem. There was no room at
the inn, so the Christ could not be born there. When there is no
room within us, the Christ Consciousness cannot be born there,
either. It is up to us to unify the fractured self within, making it
love-based, not fear-based, so the presence of God will have a
suitable home; so the Christ child will be welcome in the inn.
Through the forgiveness process, each fractured
personality piece is identified; the issue within the piece is
addressed and resolved, thus dissolving the piece. The
knowledge gained from resolving the issue is retained; all the
rest of it can be discarded. The inner words, the attitude, the
emotions and posturing involved in this issue are all stage props
for the ego. They have no real value, once the issue is resolved,
and thus need to be discarded.
In this way we gradually integrate the personality pieces
into a real whole which is spirit-based. The separate voices are
gradually eliminated, leaving only one voice: the voice of the
spirit within. This one voice is referred to as being solitary. The
voice of the spirit within has been raised to the level of highest
importance, and thus has become the elect. It is the unified self,
based on the spirit within, which finds the Kingdom. The spirit
within is from God and it is the only aspect of us which can return
to the presence of God.
(50) Jesus said, “If they say to you, ‘Where did you
come from?,’ say to them, ‘We came from the Light,
the place where the Light came into being on its own
accord and established itself and became manifest
through their image.’ If they say to you ‘Is it you?’
say ‘We are its children, and we are the elect of the
Living Father.’ If they ask you, ‘What is the sign of
your Father in you?’ say to them, ‘It is movement
and it is rest.’”
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Our individual spirit comes from God. The nature of that
spirit is living light. We have come from the Light (God) where
the Light (note the use of upper case – referring to God) came
into being of its own accord and established itself and became
manifest through their image. The presence of God becomes
manifest when we complete the process of inner unification. The
light of spirit grows and intensifies as we imbed ourselves deeper
into the Kingdom. Eventually, the presence of God is the only
activating force in our lives; our actions and words become the
actions and words of the Spirit working through us. Some may
confuse this with thinking we are God. This is not true; we are
the children of God, and as unified inner beings, the spirit within
has become the solitary, and the elect of the Living Father
(Spirit).
The sign of the spirit within us is first of all movement.
Our spirit is the source of our individual life; without it the body
does not live. Rest is the deep abiding peace which results from
the process of inner unification and living in the presence of God.
The combination of movement and rest is the sign of the Father
in us.
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that state of consciousness has experienced the same thing; the
deep abiding peace, the unconditional love which comes from
God, the joy and the presence of God in their lives. Each person
has become transformed by the experience and has entered into
a new world, living in the presence of God.
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profitable”. The point is that cutting away the unnecessary part
from around the spirit within is a very useful and beneficial
practice. The ego, the false self, stands between us and the
presence of God in our lives. If we are to enter into that
consciousness the ego must be cut away and discarded.
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Each family produces some amount of trauma in the
process of children growing up. Even if the parents are doing a
really good job of raising their children, a trauma does not have
to be real or serious, only perceived on the part of the child. The
key here is not the actual trauma, but the impact it has had on
the ego. It is the effect of the trauma, or perceived trauma, which
must be resolved. Remember, it is not the outer conditions which
separate us from God, it is the inner ones. The negative
conclusions and feelings we have made and harbor regarding
ourselves are the things that separate us from the presence of
God. By resolving the inner issues with the intention of making
room for the presence of God, the experience will come to us.
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the harvest) that we can begin to see clearly what is valuable
and what is not. Just as grain is not harvested in a single day, so
too does the separation of truth from falsehood take time.
The harvesting process begins with the separation of the
weeds from the wheat. The weeds are thrown in a pile and
burned. This, effectively, is what we do when we separate the
main ideas of truth from the obvious ideas of falsehood. The
false is discarded and destroyed. Next comes the separation of
the chaff from the grain. This is where we take the grain of truth
in each situation in our life and separate it from the outer
circumstances in which it appears. We are separating what we
learned from the conditions of the event.
Life is like birthdays or Christmas. We get packages with
gifts hidden within. We don’t know what the gift is until we open
the package. Once the gift is revealed, we can discard the
packaging and keep the gift. In life, we tend to hang on to the
package (what happened to us) without opening it and revealing
the gift inside (the lesson learned). Once we learn the lesson life
has brought to us, we can discard what happened to us.
Stevan Davies 5 and John Dart with Ray Riegert 6 use the
word labored in place of suffered. This is an excellent choice of
words, for the inner spiritual growth process takes work, and this
is not something which happens by itself. It is a consciousness
which we enter into intentionally and sometimes with great effort.
In the beginning the goal is awakening, but this simply marks the
end of one journey and the beginning of another.
The Sufis have told us there are two journeys; the
journey to God, and the journey in God. Spiritual awakening
(enlightenment) is the common ground between the two
journeys. As a result, spiritual growth should be considered a
life-long practice. The more time and effort that is put into
spiritual growth, the deeper you can move into the Kingdom of
Heaven. The experiences become deeper and more profound
and the understanding becomes clearer as you get deeper into
the Kingdom. It’s a progressive process.
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The beginning goal is to find and experience the spirit
within. This takes persistent effort and some dedication. But
once we find the spirit within, we have found our personal source
of life and begin to see how it is connected to all life and the
source of all which is. This is the main turning point; finding the
spirit within, the source of our life.
(59) Jesus said: Look at the living one while you live,
for if you die and then try to see him you will not be
able to do so.
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(60) They saw a Samaritan carrying a lamb on his
way to Judea. He said to His disciples, “Why does
that man carry the lamb around?” They said to Him,
“So that he may kill and eat it.” He said to them,
“While it is alive, he will not eat it, but only when he
has killed it and it has become a corpse.” They said
to Him “He cannot do otherwise.” He said to them,
“You too, look for a place for yourselves within the
Rest, lest you become a corpse and be eaten.”
(61) Jesus said, “Two will rest on a bed: the one will
die, and the other will live.” Salome said, “Who are
you, man, that You, as though from the One, have
come up on my couch and eaten from my table?”
Jesus said to her, “I am He who exists from the
Undivided. I was given some of the things of My
Father.” Salome said, “I am your disciple.” Jesus
said to her, “Therefore I say, if he is undivided, he
will be filled with light, but if he is divided, he will be
filled with darkness.”
Two will rest on a bed: the one will die, and the other will
live. This is the physical body and the spirit within. The physical
body will die but the spirit within will live, for the spirit has eternal
life as one of its qualities. The spirit is living light, the substance
of God from which it was created.
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Many spiritual sayings have several levels of meaning. “I
am He who exists from the undivided” can refer to the spirit
which exists from the substance of God. It can also refer to the
consciousness which is developed from the spiritual growth
process. Sayings which have several different levels of meaning
are often used as a subtle test to see where the students are in
their spiritual understanding. In this example, seeing that spirit is
living light from the substance of God is a perception
experienced earlier on in the spiritual growth process.
Recognizing the nature of the emerging consciousness into an
undivided state is a more advanced perception.
Jesus said, “I was given some of the things of My
Father.” This tells us more about how the spiritual growth
process works. We begin with only an intellectual concept of God
and the spirit. Through learning and practice we begin having
spiritual experiences, and by this process gain more knowledge
and understanding. As we become more unified we gradually
gain more spiritual attributes, such as a greater depth of insight
into people or, later on, the ability to heal other people. The
deeper we progress into oneness and the Kingdom of Heaven,
the more of these spiritual attributes we acquire.
This is the same process we use in this world as good
parents. Our primary function as a parent is to prepare our
children to function effectively in the world. As part of the
training, we gradually give more responsibility to our children as
they mature. In this process the emerging adults gradually build
a base of skills which will serve them effectively in dealing with
other people, building a career and raising their own family.
Spiritual growth follows the same pattern. God allows more of
the Spirit to flow through us and demonstrate itself in more ways
as we mature spiritually.
Jesus said, “Therefore I say, if he is undivided, he will be
filled with light, but if he is divided, he will be filled with
darkness.” This is the fractured nature of the ego-based
personality which is transformed into the undivided spirit-based
individuals we are meant to be. Darkness represents ignorance,
and light represents knowledge and understanding. Light also
represents the presence of spirit. The stronger the spirit
becomes, the stronger the light within becomes. Again there are
multiple levels of meaning, based on multiple levels of spiritual
development. Spiritual teaching and advanced spiritual states
are always about consciousness. The unification of the true self
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is the unification of consciousness, centered around the spirit
within.
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each freshman class. He takes several large rocks and puts
them into a large glass container. He then asks the class if the
container is full. It is obvious that no more rocks can be added so
the class answers “Yes, the container is full.” The professor then
takes small rocks and adds them to the container, filling up the
spaces between the large rocks. Again he asks the question “Is
the container full?” And again the class answers “Yes.” The
professor now pours sand into the container, filling up the
smaller spaces, and again asks if the container is full. Again the
class answers “Yes.” The professor then adds water to the
container and again asks if the container is full. Now the class is
sure of its answer: “Yes, now it is full.” The professor then slowly
adds some salt to the container which dissolves into the water.
The professor now asks, “What have we learned from the
experiment?” The class offers many explanations but misses the
point, so the professor explains, “If you don’t put the large rocks
in first, you’ll never get them in at all. If you don’t do the things
which are the most important first, you’ll never get them done.”
The point of the story is that spiritual growth is the one
thing which will move us out of the suffering and death the world
offers and into the peace, love, joy and eternal life which God
offers. If we don’t do our spiritual growth first, it won’t get done.
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invited to the dinner have asked to be excused.’ The
master said to his servant, ‘Go outside to the streets
and bring back those whom you happen to meet, so
that they may dine. Traders and merchants will not
enter the places of My Father.’”
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The concept of a Son of God being seized and killed
was not a new idea in the time of Jesus. Even ordinary people
were familiar with several Sons of God from the past who were
seized and killed. In the Middle East, people were familiar with
Osiris from Egypt, Mithra from Persia, and Adad from Assyria.
From a little farther away we have Chrishna of Hindustan and
Buddha of India. These were the legends with which they grew
up. So Jesus is using their familiarity with these teachings to
demonstrate the inner nature of the ego against the spirit within.
The ego is essentially given the job of being a servant, of
ordering and coordinating our life. The spirit is intended to be the
recipient, or beneficiary, of the ego’s work. But the ego has
aspirations of its own. From our early years we begin to identify
with the ego as us. What the ego wants, we want. It all becomes
very simple and straightforward. The arrival of the spirit into our
awareness is disturbing. Initial ideas about the presence of the
spirit within and the Kingdom of Heaven are usually beaten down
by the ego and dismissed. This is represented by the servants of
the master being beaten by the tenants. When the spirit within
(the son) makes its appearance, the ego tries to kill it. The ego
generally wants nothing to do with the emerging spirit within and
wants it to disappear by any means necessary.
This is why many people will insist that God is someone
or something which is “out there” but cannot appear within. “Out
there” is safe. “Within” is dangerous; it challenges the power and
authority of the ego and its fractured personality. The presence
of the spirit within and its ability to bring about the Kingdom of
Heaven, true salvation and eternal life is the single most
devastating challenge the ego ever faces. Everything is at risk:
our belief in God, salvation, family, career, money, power,
control, social position and everything else attached to life as we
know it. Everything we thought we were or could be is
challenged by the presence of the spirit within. If the spirit within
is real, the mountain which has become our life is about to be
obliterated.
Just as the tenants falsely perceive the produce from the
vineyard as theirs, the ego falsely perceives the benefits of life
as its own. Life is the birthright of the spirit, not the ego. The
body is meant to serve the spirit within, not the ego. Our lives are
constructed so that we may ultimately learn that what we see,
touch and feel in life is illusion, and what we can’t see and touch
is real. A complete reversal in perceptions is required before we
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discover who and what we really are. We must unlearn the ways
of the world and learn the ways of God. In doing so, we
transform not only our own life, but also parts of the lives of
those we encounter on our journey back to, and into, God.
Indeed, this transformation is the sole purpose for life as we
know it.
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come to know the “All” by having this intense spiritual
experience, but having missed the connection to their own inner
spiritual self, they are clueless about the ramifications of spiritual
growth, true salvation and eternal life.
This is one of the reasons Jesus taught as many people
as would listen to him. People have spiritual experiences. If they
don’t know how these experiences relate to the spirit within, they
miss the greatest opportunity of their entire lives. This is another
level of understanding for saying #64 above. By living with their
focus in the world, they spend their time with small, relatively
unimportant things while they miss the Kingdom of Heaven. This
is why an understanding of our inner spiritual nature is so
important. When a deep spiritual experience comes (the
invitation to dine with the Master) we need to understand the
implications of what is happening to us. We are being invited into
the presence of God and are being given the opportunity to enter
into eternal life. If we don’t understand that connection, we miss
everything.
This saying and the one which follows are very similar
and revolve around the same issue, so we will address them
together.
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in fact persecute the ego. It is this inner attack and persecution,
which in time dismantles the ego, that is responsible for the
awakening, raising up and empowerment of the spirit which
places us in the Kingdom of Heaven.
Once we realize it is the ego which stands between us
and the presence of God, we are faced with the choice of
remaining with the ego and living our life separated from God or
persecuting and dismantling the ego and entering into life within
the presence of God. This is the simple essence of the choice
we have before us. We serve the ego or we serve God.
(70) Jesus said, “That which you have within you will
save you if you bring it forth from yourselves. That
which you do not have within you will kill you, if you
do not have it inside you.”
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(71) Jesus said, “I shall destroy this house, and no
one will be able to rebuild it.”
84
(74) He said, “Oh Lord there are many around the
well, but there is nothing in the cistern.”
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Jesus tells us to seek His unfailing and enduring
treasure which cannot be destroyed. That treasure is the
awakened and empowered spirit within, and the eternal life
which is gained by attaching our consciousness to the spirit
rather than to the ego, which will fade away into nothingness.
This practice of awakening the spirit within, raising and
empowering that spirit and attaching our consciousness to the
spirit within is the single most important idea Jesus offers. Every
treasure the world has to offer can and will be taken away from
you. Death will separate you from it all. Only the eternal life
Jesus offers will remain.
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God functions in a similar manner. God appears not to
be there until we learn to “tune in” to the level of consciousness
where we can experience the presence of God. Our failure to
tune in is not proof God does not exist. If you have a television
set and never turn it on, it does not mean there are no television
programs. Turning the television set on will prove these
programs exist. You can experience a wide variety of programs
once the set is turned on. The same holds true with God. Once
we awaken and turn on the spirit within, we will experience the
presence of God. That experience is the proof of God’s
existence. Just as we might find an interesting channel on the
television and tell a friend about the program and its content and
how to get the station, so too do spiritual teachers tell others
about God, the content of the experience, and the means of
tuning in to that level of consciousness. The entire teaching of
Jesus centers on the concepts and practices of tuning in to God.
It’s all there, once we learn what the teaching really means.
(78) Jesus said, “Why have you come out into the
desert? To see a reed shaken by the wind? And to
see a man clothed in soft raiment like your kings and
your great men? Upon them are the fine garments,
and they are unable to discern the truth.”
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usually disappointed by what it sees. What it misses is the
extraordinary experience which is taking place within the person.
We are curious and intrigued by the person living within the
presence of God. We want to know what it is like and what
changes has this experience made in their lives. In essence, we
want to know what it would be like for us to have this experience:
to live in the presence of God. We imagine it to be a life-
changing experience, and it is. But the change is not what we
expect. The change is all internal, which means our outer life
conditions often change very little. This expression sums it up
well: “Before enlightenment you chop wood and carry water.
After enlightenment you chop wood and carry water.”
The change we are looking for is the inner
transformation of consciousness, rather than worldly success.
This is why Jesus commented that the wealthy and powerful of
this world “have their reward.” They have focused on the things
of the world, and their success is their reward. By focusing on
the inner spiritual being and the inner practice of self-unification,
we enter into the Kingdom of Heaven and begin living our life in
the presence of God. The reward for doing so is not worldly
success but eternal life.
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inner processes which lead to oneness with God and all of
creation.
We become blessed not by beseeching God for favor or
by proclaiming the Kingdom, but by entering into the
consciousness of oneness. Seeking favor and invoking
proclamations are ways of the world and as such are the tools
and workings of the ego. None of these things will produce the
Kingdom of Heaven. Only changing our inner state of
consciousness and unifying the fractured inner self will get us
into the Kingdom. Only by “hearing” and understanding the inner
spiritual process, the Word of the Father, can we become
blessed, and then only with a great deal of work. Spiritual growth
is not luck or fate; it is the result of unlearning the ways of the
world, learning the ways of God and the Spirit, and keeping
those ways.
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The real issue is not power itself, but the control over
others it comes to represent. The desire to control others is what
must be renounced. Power, like wealth, is a tool. The problem
lies not in the tool, but in its application. Power and wealth can
be used to implement a great deal of good in the world, but its
most common use is to increase the pain and suffering of
humanity. This is accomplished through the aggrandizement of
one or more human egos at the expense of other people’s lives.
What we do with power is strictly dependant on what is
in our hearts. A good person brings forth good from his
warehouse, and an evil person brings forth evil (“warehouse”
signifying the heart). The feelings within us are the source of our
actions. Rarely does logic dictate our actions. As long as we
function from a fractured inner nature we find the unresolved
issues within us dictating our actions and our lives. This is the
source of evil in the actions of people in this world: the
unresolved inner issues within each person. By going through a
process of inner unification based on the spirit within, we resolve
all of these inner issues. When we do this, the need to control
others is resolved as well. We can then view wealth and power
as means of implementing the growth and individuality of others,
rather than as a means of control.
In his book, The Gospel of Thomas, Stevan Davies 8
highlights another level of understanding for this saying by
relating it to saying #3. If self-knowledge leads to the realization
of the spirit within, this can be expressed as a type of wealth, for
its opposite, lack of self-knowledge is expressed as poverty.
Ideally, those who have spiritual understanding should be the
ones to rule. True spiritual understanding draws one to service,
and should be the guiding quality of those who rule over others.
Unfortunately, the most spiritual people do not seek public office
or positions of power over others.
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which brings us into the presence of God: into the Kingdom.
Whoever is not following this inner process of unification and
transformation is far from the experience of the presence of God
and the Kingdom of Heaven.
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(84) Jesus said, “When you see your likeness, you
rejoice. But when you see your images which came
into being before you, and which neither die nor
become manifest, how much will you have to bear!”
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deemed “worthy.” Over the years “worthy” changed from
meaning serious students of spiritual growth to the wealthy and
socially elite, all others being considered “unclean.” Jesus is
returning the use of the term “worthy” to its original meaning: one
who is serious and dedicated to the inner spiritual practice.
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has neither the time nor the inclination to devote himself to
making us happy. Even if he tries, he cannot succeed.
Happiness is the result of entering into the love and joy which
emanates from God and flows through us into the world. Another
person cannot make us happy, nor can he fulfill the inner needs
we each experience.
When we depend on another to fulfill our inner needs,
we open ourselves to the many disappointments and emotional
injuries we all suffer in life. The other day I saw a young girl
walking down the street wearing a shirt with “I HAVE ISSUES”
printed on it. My thought was “no kidding, welcome to planet
earth.” We all have issues. The part which makes us wretched is
that our issues and emotional injuries take the place of the
presence of God in our lives. When our life is filled with issues
and we are dependant on another person to fulfill our inner
needs, there is no room left for the presence of God. Unless we
fulfill our own inner needs, our soul or spirit is barred from
experiencing the full and complete presence of God.
We are responsible for fulfilling our own inner needs,
resolving our emotional issues, and creating a suitable home
within for the presence of God to enter. Each issue which is
resolved provides space for some of the presence of God. As
our work on unification of the self continues, we experience more
and more of the presence of God in our lives. As the process of
transformation becomes complete we find ourselves living
completely within the presence of God, filled with peace, love
and joy. We will have become one with God and one with all of
creation.
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The Father loves the Son, and everything the Father has
is given to the Son. This is our inheritance. Spirit (God) creates
the spirit within and as the spirit within matures, power and
authority are gradually given to it. We do the same thing in the
world. As our children mature we give them more power and
authority over their own activities. This is part of the maturing
process. We learn that authority and responsibility are two sides
of the same coin; they must work together. We only create
problems when we try to separate authority and responsibility.
Just as we don’t toss the keys to the family car to a five
year old and tell him to have fun, so too is spiritual power not
given to those who are not spiritually mature. The consequences
are too serious. As we grow spiritually we receive knowledge
and insights as a result of our spiritual experiences. These are
things which are ours as part of our inheritance, but we have not
taken possession of them due to our lack of spiritual maturity. As
knowledge matures into wisdom, we gradually gain the power
and authority associated with the knowledge we have come to
understand. These are the things we may perceive as coming
from the angels and prophets.
In exchange we must give them (release) the limitations
we have adopted over the years. It is like the story of Jonathan
Livingston Seagull 9 where he finally comes to the realization,
“Why, that’s true! I am a perfect, unlimited gull!” We come to the
realization of who and what we really are only as we give up the
limitations we have imposed on our own consciousness.
When will they come and take what is theirs? When we
have been given so much we wonder what we will have to give
in return. What will God require of us in exchange for what we
have gained? A true spiritual path will cost you everything and
nothing. It will require that you give up all of your fear, anger,
hatred, jealousy, envy, resentment, bitterness and pride. You will
have to give up all of your limiting concepts, ideas, beliefs,
feelings and thoughts of worthlessness and shame. Everything
which stands between you and your full and complete conscious
contact with God must go. You will give up the person you
thought you were, only to have it replaced with the divine being
you really are. You will find that everything you give up has no
value anyway, and you are simply releasing that which has held
you down for so long.
The secret is, what the angels and prophets receive, and
what is theirs, is your friendship, your brotherhood or sisterhood.
The bond of shared consciousness is part of the Love which
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emanates from God; it is unconditional and unlimited. What God
requires of us is our loving service to the children of God in this
world. In providing that service, we are blessed, not by receiving
God’s love, but by its flow as it passes through us. There is no
greater love; there is no greater experience.
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(negative) emotions tell the body to produce the energy needed
by the ego, and the higher emotions of love and compassion tell
the body to produce the energy needed by the spirit within. The
results we experience are determined not by the emotions of a
passing moment, but by which emotions dominate our lives the
vast majority of the time.
Just as the washing of the cup illustrates, there is a
cleansing process for both the mind and the emotions. Both our
thoughts and feelings must be transformed, if we are to be
transformed spiritually. This is what the spiritual exercises are
designed to accomplish. This is why Jesus repeatedly talked
about forgiveness. When we forgive both mentally and
emotionally, we free ourselves from the past. We are then free to
choose our own emotions in the present rather than being
trapped into experiencing the emotions of the past. Our past sins
(the negative thoughts and feelings in the past) can be washed
away (transformed into love and compassion) through salvation
(the awakening and empowerment of the spirit within).
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need. Step by step we enter into the presence of God and we
gradually come into the deep abiding peace which is the rest of
which Jesus speaks. Spiritual growth is not about obedience or
sacrifice, but rather inner transformation and unification of the
self.
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fruit; you come to know people by what they actually do in real
life. Is this teacher really trying to teach, or is it about money or
domination? A true spiritual teacher teaches out of a desire to be
of service to others, not to have others serve him.
(92) Jesus said, “Seek and you shall find. Yet, what
you asked Me about in former times and which I did
not tell you then, now I wish to tell, but you do not
inquire after it.”
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If the reaction is positive and he seems open to more, we share
a little more. Learning is a prolonged step-by-step process. You
didn’t go from kindergarten to a senior in high school in a week.
Learning and the growth associated with it take time. If a person
is not open to the inner path, don’t continue to share the inner
information with him. Share only where the information is valued
and accepted.
(94) Jesus said, “He who seeks will find, and (he
who knocks) will be let in.”
100
(96) Jesus said, “The Kingdom of the Father is like a
certain woman. She took a little leaven and
concealed it in some dough, and made it into large
loaves. Let him who has ears hear.”
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awakening. When the awakening (enlightenment) takes place we
are surprised by what has happened.
The ego fights back through the entire process until it
has nothing more with which to fight. At that point the ego has no
other choice than to recognize the awakened spirit within. This is
the point described in the Gospel of John, Chapter 3, where
John the Baptist admits he is not the Christ. The ego admits it is
not the spirit within, and that it has to decrease in order for the
spirit within to increase. The parable is about a woman, which
indicates we are dealing with emotional issues. The jar
represents the ego and the meal represents the issues and
emotional states of the ego. The meal emptying out behind her
on the road represents the gradual process of emptying out the
issues and emotional states and leaving them behind (doing the
spiritual exercises). When the woman reaches her house (the
Kingdom of Heaven) she sets the jar down (the ego is set aside)
and finds it empty (the ego has no remaining issues or negative
emotional states with which to manipulate and control us).
The Kingdom of heaven is a state of consciousness
which takes the place of our lower worldly thinking and feeling.
The Kingdom is not added onto the things of the world but must
replace them entirely. We must choose the Kingdom or the
world; we cannot have both. This is why this parable is so
important. It clearly demonstrates that what we have within us
must be emptied out before we can enter into the Kingdom of
Heaven.
(98) Jesus said, “The Kingdom of the Father is like a
certain man who wanted to kill a powerful man. In
his house he drew his sword and stuck it into the
wall in order to find out whether his hand could
carry through. Then he slew the powerful man.”
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between us and the presence of God in our lives. If we are to
enter into the Kingdom, the ego must die.
What we really want to know is, “Can I actually do this?
Can I really enter into the presence of God?” The answer can be
demonstrated by beginning the exercises. The process starts
with the observation of our thoughts and emotional reactions to
things which happen in the world. Once we observe the ping-
pong ball action between our thoughts and feelings as an
emotional state is being built, we realize that the ego really is
manipulating and controlling our life. We have caught the ego in
the act. This is the first realization that the inner path is real.
As we continue on with the exercises we will have a
spiritual experience where we get a small sample of the
presence of God. This experience is confirmation that the
process actually works. Once you have your first experience with
the presence of God you will know that all of the Kingdom can be
yours. This is what the man sticking his sword into the wall
represents. When you have your first spiritual experience, you
will know you have what it takes; you will know you can follow
through. The process is the same. Persist and you will succeed.
All the Father has will be given to you as you grow and mature in
the presence of God.
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coincidence which brought you and certain individuals together
in your life. We live in an interactive universe where everything is
connected through God. A coincidence is an incidence which is
connected to another incidence, becoming co-incidences, related
beyond our normal perception. You can think of the term
coincidence as a condensed form of connected incidence. We
are all connected through God; we just don’t usually see the
connection until we start perceiving the presence of God in
everything. Then it all starts to become clear; there is only
oneness.
104
(101) Jesus said, “Whoever does not hate his father
and mother as I do cannot become a disciple to Me.
And whoever does not love his father and his
mother as I do cannot become a disciple to Me. For
My mother gave me falsehood, but My true Mother
gave me life.”
105
is the birthright of every human on the planet to know about the
ego and the spirit, and how to awaken, raise and empower the
spirit within. Each person will decide for himself what he wants to
do, but we all deserve and need to have the information.
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(104) They said to Jesus, “Come, let us pray today
and let us fast.” Jesus said “What is the sin I have
committed, or wherein have I been defeated? But
when the bridegroom leaves the bridal chamber,
then let them fast and pray.”
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(105) Jesus said, “He who knows the father and the
mother will be called the son of a harlot.”
(106) Jesus said, “When you make the two One, you
will become the Sons of Man. And when you say,
Mountain, move away, it will move away.”
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The parable of the lost sheep is an important example of
the difference between the inner and outer interpretations of the
sayings of Jesus. The outer interpretation perceives the lost
sheep as someone who has left the flock and has lost his way.
Security comes from being part of the flock or congregation. As
long as a person remains within the established doctrine he is
safe. Leaving the established doctrine is not safe. One goes
astray by not believing correctly. Many congregations perceive
the role of the minister as being the shepherd: finding those who
have gone astray and bringing them back to the flock.
The inner interpretation perceives the flock as a
confined, limited belief system, thinking and believing inside of
the box. The person who begins to think on his own begins to
move out of the box, thus leaving the belief system of the
congregation, or leaving the flock. In this example the sheep is
the largest, which represents the strongest of the flock or
congregation. This strength refers to strength of character and
independence. It is this strength which not only enables the
person to leave the congregation, but ultimately drives him to
leave. This is the person seeking more than the established
doctrine can provide. This is the person seeking true direct
contact and connection with God. This is the beginning of a
serious spiritual journey.
A strange and wonderful thing happens on this journey.
In our search for God we not only find ourselves, but also we are
found. The Kingdom is like the shepherd. Once we are seriously
involved in our spiritual journey, the Kingdom comes and “finds”
us. It is a cooperative process. In essence, it is our serious
seeking which brings us to the attention of God in the first place.
Once we are “found” we experience the unconditional love which
comes from God. We feel loved more than the ninety-nine. God
loves each of us equally, but as long as we remain inside the
established doctrine, we are limited in our experience of God’s
love by our limited belief system. The Kingdom cannot be added
onto the existing belief system with all of our issues and
emotional traumas. We must resolve the issues and traumas to
make room for the Kingdom. Resolving those issues and
traumas brings us out of the flock, out of the ordinary
consciousness of the world and into a condition where we can be
identified as seriously seeking God. We are making room inside
of us for the presence of God, creating a suitable home for the
peace, love and joy which is of God. We were lost, and now are
found.
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(108) Jesus said, “He who will drink from My mouth
will become like Me; I Myself shall become he, and
the things that are hidden will be revealed to him.”
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could leave them: the field of consciousness without knowing
about the treasure of spirit and eternal life. Our children, too, will
live their lives not knowing about the treasure within.
The one who goes plowing is the one who embarks on
the journey of self-discovery and goes through the process of
inner unification, plowing up the emotions and programming of
the past. It is through this process that we discover the treasure
of the spirit within. In the world, the one who is wealthy can lend
money at interest to anyone. In spiritual terms, we have enough
knowledge and understanding to teach others and share the
wealth of wisdom which is of God. How much better would life be
if we could learn about the spirit within and the contest between
the spirit and the ego in our childhood? How would our lives and
the lives of our children be transformed? If we only knew.
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(111) Jesus said, “The heavens and the earth will be
rolled up in your presence; and the one who lives
from the Living One will not see death.” Does not
Jesus say, “Whoever finds himself is superior to the
world?”
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This is what people want to know; “When will the
Kingdom come?” Some people believe it will come with the
Second Coming of Christ. If they wait, it will come. Others
believe they can enter the Kingdom by affirmation or decreeing
themselves to be in the Kingdom. Jesus is saying none of these
things will work. Rather, the Kingdom of the Father is spread out
upon the earth, and men do not see it. If the Kingdom of the
Father, or the Kingdom of Heaven, were a collective experience
(happening to everyone at the same time) then Jesus is telling
us it has already come (saying #51). The Kingdom is an
individual experience, not a collective one. We enter into the
Kingdom by our own efforts and dedication through the process
of self-discovery and inner-unification. The Kingdom has been
here all along, spread out upon the earth. The presence of God
is in and of everything. It always has been; we just haven’t
perceived it. The Kingdom of the Father is a state of
consciousness, not a place or a time. We enter into the Kingdom
by changing our consciousness to coincide with the
consciousness of God. It really is that simple.
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discovery and inner unification produces is a balancing of all the
qualities within. Everything joins in a seamless unity of balance
and harmony. We come to peace with everything in our life and
join in the oneness of God and all of creation. We become
centered in Love and the presence of God, and act as a force for
good and redemption in the world. As we fully and completely
enter the Kingdom of Heaven, we become the mechanism
through which God sends His Peace, Love and Joy into the
world. Our thoughts, feelings and actions work together to bless
all who come into our presence, and we are blessed in the
process. Through us, the Kingdom of Heaven becomes a reality
in the world.
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THE EXERCISES
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conscious level of the mind. When we identify ourselves with the
ego and think that it is who we really are, the ego can operate
without being noticed by the conscious mind. By expanding our
awareness even slightly the actions and activity of the ego
become apparent.
The ego follows the principle of divide and conquer. In
keeping with that, the ego maintains a collection of issues and
emotional traumas and perceived injuries. It is a type of laundry
list from which the ego can pick and choose depending on the
particular situation it faces. The purpose of the list of issues is
not the event itself, but the emotional energy which can be
generated by the issue. The ego derives its strength and energy
from the emotions we experience. The types of energy the ego
can use essentially as food come from the negative emotions
which are fear- and pride-based. These include: fear, anger,
hatred, guilt, envy, shame, lust, resentment, bitterness,
superiority, prejudice, inferiority, disgust, revulsion and false
pride. False pride is feeling that we are better than others. True
pride is satisfaction in an accomplishment of a job well done.
True pride remains internal; false pride is advertised to the rest
of the world.
The spirit within also derives its energy from our
emotions, but the nature of the energy itself is different. This
difference can be expressed as a higher frequency, or a finer
grain or consistency. This emotional energy is generated by the
positive emotions of peace, love, joy, compassion, caring,
happiness, gentleness, respect and true pride. The physical
body is designed to produce the specific type of energy we
request, based on the emotions we choose to experience, on a
moment-by-moment basis. The ego manipulates us into
experiencing almost exclusively negative-based emotions from
which it derives its energy. The spirit cannot use the lower-based
energy produced by the negative emotions, so it enters a type of
hibernation, waiting for the proper type of emotional energy to
become available. By manipulating us into the negative
emotions, the ego has all the food it wants and at the same time
is denying food to the spirit, which the ego sees as its primary
competition. (The ego sees other egos as secondary
competition.)
The ego uses a sequence of an initial trigger (internal or
external), followed by an emotion related to the trigger, followed
by a thought - usually a restatement of a conclusion we have
come to about ourselves in the past. The thought acts as an
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internal trigger and the process continues to build one emotion
on top of another until a strong emotional state is attained. This
creates an energy banquet for the ego. The trigger can be
external (an event: something someone says or does) or it can
be internal (a thought). The emotions generated in this sequence
are all related and based on the same issue so the end effect is
a building of strength as one is added on to another, each
reinforcing the others.
The first task in the discovery process is to look for the
sequence: trigger, emotion, thought, emotion, thought, emotion,
thought, as an emotional state is being built. It is not necessary
to catch the sequence from the very beginning. Discovering the
ego at any part of the sequence will work. In the early stages the
emotional states come and go and we recognize that we have
missed the entire thing hours or even days after the fact. Do not
be discouraged; simply persist in looking for the sequence.
Observation
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start, and starting is very important. Remember, it doesn’t have
to be perfect; it just has to be done.
As you become more practiced at observation, you will
catch the developing emotional state before it becomes full
blown. One of the things you may experience is that the minute
you recognize the developing emotional state, it stops. What has
happened is the ego has been caught doing what it does, and
like a child, does not like to be caught in the act. When this
happens to you, you will know that what we are discussing about
the ego really is true. The ego really does work to manipulate
you and control your thoughts and emotions. At this point you
have taken your first real step into a larger world of awareness.
With more practice, you will identify all three elements of
a building emotional state: the trigger, the emotion involved, and
a pattern of related thoughts. As you recognize what is going on,
the building of the emotional state will stop. This initial success
will also result in a complete failure at some point and you will
experience a major emotional upset. What is happening is the
ego, interrupted so many times, has become desperate for its
emotional feeding. This failure to stop the emotional state is just
part of the process and should not be taken seriously. It will
show you that the process is going to take time and effort. You
will come to know that you have a real fight on your hands. The
ego is not just going to disappear. This is an inner war, and you
are going to have to persist all the way through to the end. The
process is simple; it’s just not easy. Remember: every
worthwhile project requires a great deal of work, and the greater
the value, the greater the work. Continue observing until you
have identified ten to twelve thoughts for each emotion identified.
What you will notice after a month or so of observation is
that there are repetitive patterns in emotional states and related
thoughts. Rewrite your list from the notebook so that all of the
same or closely related emotions are grouped together. Create
new headings based on the emotion (anger, guilt, frustration,
etc.) and then list the associated thoughts under the related
emotion. For most people the observations that were written
down in the notebook will fall into three or four general
categories based on emotions. These are the emotional states
selected by the ego to generate its food. These are also the
emotional states which are taking the place of the presence of
God in your life. What you really need to realize at this point is
this is exactly what the ego has to offer you for the rest of your
life. Your list of emotions is your past. It will also be your future if
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you do not change your thoughts, emotions and actions today.
So the question now becomes: Do you want these emotional
states, or do you want the presence of God instead? This is
where you have to make a choice. You can have these
emotions, or you can have the deep abiding peace, the
unconditional love which comes from God, and the joy of God in
your life. You can’t have both; you have to choose. If you choose
the presence of God all of these negative emotions must go;
nothing can remain. This may be the single most important
decision of your life. Don’t wait or put it off; decide now, once and
for all.
The thoughts which are now organized by their related
emotion represent the conclusions you have come to about
yourself, or that have been programmed into your mind by
others. This is a listing of the “self image” which is actually
running your life. Now you can see what the ego is actually doing
to you and why it has to go. The list of thoughts will act as a type
of road map which you can use to identify where these thoughts
and emotions came from in your past. There are three major
sources for emotions and their related thoughts: traumas,
programming and imprinting.
Traumas
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the self-discovery process. Denial has the effect of slowing down
the process, forcing the individual to dig out hidden factors and
events before effectively resolving them. The person who has
developed a “laundry list” of what has been done to him (actual
or perceived) has a head start in this regard. They know exactly
what needs to be resolved.
These traumas have a specific internal structure to them.
The structure is dual in nature, composed of an intellectual
component and an emotional one. Each of the conclusions
(thoughts) recorded on your list is strongly linked to the
associated emotion. Each component (thought or emotion) has a
memory of the other. We can use affirmations to alter the
thought patterns, but if the emotions are left they will regenerate
the thought patterns. We can also use emotional release
techniques, but if the thoughts remain, they will regenerate the
emotions. It may take six months to a year for the regeneration
to take place, but it will happen. The answer is to resolve both
the thoughts and the associated emotions together so nothing
remains.
Issues
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result is the same. As you go through the process of self-
discovery you will begin to see more clearly what the ego is
doing and how it manipulates and controls your life. You will
understand why the mystery school system portrays the ego as
the one who opposes: Satan, or as the antichrist. The ego
opposes the spirit within, corrupting our mind and heart and
bringing unnecessary pain and suffering into our lives. Each
issue is a launching pad for some form of suffering, experienced
either by ourself, or by someone else. The hurtful things we do
are born out of our own pain, and become the weapons of the
ego.
Each issue can and must be resolved. By resolving an
issue, we remove it from the arsenal the ego uses against us. In
time, with enough work, we can resolve all of the issues the ego
is using against us. With each issue resolved, we come one step
closer to that 100% full conscious contact with God, one step
closer to the Kingdom of Heaven and the Christ Consciousness.
Once we are free of issues, we will see the world and all the
creatures in it clearly. The world and our experience in it will
have been completely transformed.
Programming
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discarding those things which do not. This is a difficult process,
for it requires us to question many cherished beliefs and
attitudes. This is especially true when it comes to our beliefs
about God. This is why the Gnostic approach is so important:
There is no dogma or official doctrine to believe. When you do
the exercises you will have the spiritual experiences. Those
experiences will reveal the true nature of God to you, and will
result in direct knowledge of God (gnosis).
Imprinting
122
As we become more adept at observing our own
thoughts and feelings, we will begin to recognize that some of
the things we say are what our mother or father used to say. This
is our first discovery of a different voice within us. This also
marks our entry into a higher level of awareness. At this point we
really don’t know what our own voice is, but we can certainly
recognize the obvious voices of relatives and authority figures in
our lives. This gives us a place to start. With time and practice
we will begin to discover voices from our own past, who we were
at five or six years of age, who we were at fourteen or eighteen.
Each stage of life produces a different voice which sounds like
us but belongs in a different time and place. Each of these
voices is not who we are now, and who we are now is not who
we will become in the future.
There is one voice, which we do not recognize until
much later in the process of self-discovery, which is our real
voice: the voice of our own spirit. That voice sleeps, waiting to be
awakened and empowered through the process of self-discovery
and spiritual growth. That is the voice we will become as we
stand in the presence of God and establish that 100% full
conscious contact with God. Until then, our practice of
observation continues, looking for the different voices within.
Examine each thought and feeling and ask yourself, “Where did
this come from? Is this the real me whom God created, or did
this come from someone else?” Keep in mind that this is a
constant process of refining, and in some circles it is referred to
as the refiner’s fire. All of the things which are not of God
eventually will be burned away. Once you accept something as
true does not mean it is true forever. It will be necessary to re-
examine what we have accepted as true a number of times.
Gurdjieff 10 explained the process by stating that we were
under 4,096 different laws, half of which were mandatory and
half were voluntary. When we stop doing the voluntary ones,
2,048 laws remain. At that point half would be mandatory and
half would be voluntary. When we stop following the voluntary
ones, 1,024 remain. The process continues down through 512,
256, 128, 64, 32, 16, 8, 4, and 2, one of which is mandatory and
one is voluntary. When we stop doing the last voluntary law only
one law will remain. The final mandatory law is that we love one
another. In the end, only the voice of God’s love, which flows
through us, will remain. That is our true voice.
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The Process of Inner Unification
124
what the true nature of God is. We will have acquired gnosis:
direct knowledge of God. Believing will have become irrelevant.
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strange, we need to understand what forgiveness really does
and why we need to practice forgiveness on a regular basis.
Let’s take a simple example of someone who is a neighbor and
makes insulting or demeaning comments to you. When you
object you are told it was meant to be funny; can’t you take a
joke? You feel hurt and are resentful about the way you are
being treated. You try to make the person see that they are
hurting you, but this only increases the abusive treatment you
are receiving from them. You think, okay, I’ll forgive them for
what they have done to me; we will wipe the slate clean and start
over with a fresh start. But nothing changes; the abusive
behavior continues. You have to conclude that forgiveness
doesn’t work.
The key to understanding forgiveness is to realize that
the intent is to stop the pain and suffering you are experiencing,
not change the behavior of other people. You can limit your
exposure to the abuse by not associating with the person
involved. Do not attend functions where this behavior may be
experienced. Avoid contact with the person. If confronted, tell
him (or her) you do not care for his comments and behavior and
do not want anything to do with him as long as this attitude and
behavior continues. Don’t argue; just walk away. In this way you
are providing consequences to the other person (removing
yourself as a target for his behavior). This is a form of holding
him accountable for his actions.
Forgiveness does not make a person’s behavior
acceptable. So what exactly does forgiveness do? One of the
reasons we are hurt by other people’s words or behaviors is
because it resonates with something inside of us, something
which already hurts. People can “push our buttons” only because
we have emotional issues which elicit specific responses. We
may ask “Don’t they know this hurts or bothers me?” Of course
they do; that’s why they are doing it. They are acting out of their
own pain and causing pain in someone else is gratifying to them.
Forgiveness is part of the process of resolving our inner issues
so there is no emotional issue within us to resonate with the
words or behaviors of other people. Once free of the inner
emotional issues, the words of other people are just empty
words, they have no meaning to us personally and we have no
emotional stake in what is being said. In effect, we are unwiring
the buttons other people are pushing. It’s like a doorbell. When it
rings, we answer the door. If we take the wire off of the button,
the doorbell doesn’t ring. The issues within us work the same
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way. When someone pushes one of our buttons, we answer. It’s
a conditioned response.
Forgiveness unwires the thought and conclusion part of
the issue within, and when the emotional part is also unwired,
someone pushing the button no longer elicits a reaction. That’s
how we know we have done our inner work. When someone
does something or says something which has always caused a
reaction, and we feel no reaction and the thoughts don’t come,
the issue is resolved. Each thought connected to an issue is
either a type of conclusion we have come to, or it is something
which has been programmed or imprinted into our
consciousness.
We are dealing with things which have been repeated
over and over again. What happens is, there is an internal
reference system at work. When we hear or see something over
and over again, each time we are exposed to it strengthens and
reinforces the original. The subconscious mind recognizes the
things for which there is an internal reference quickly. In effect
the mind looks at everything which comes in and performs an
instant analysis. The first question is, “Does this represent
something dangerous?” The internal references are consulted,
and if this internal reference says it is dangerous, then a
protective reaction is generated. If the internal reference is
deemed not dangerous, then the mind searches for what past
actions were associated with this internal reference, and the
same reaction is re-enacted. The logic is simple: I am still here,
so whatever I did in the past must have worked, so do it again.
Sometimes our behavior is inappropriate to the circumstances.
For example we visit our parents and we find ourselves reacting
like we were still children. We may be grown adults with our own
children, but some of those old reactions are still there. Our
subconscious mind and our ego don’t care; this is the way the
internal behavior reference is programmed and this is the way
we are going to react now. A key in this comes from the word
“reaction”. We are re-acting, or acting again the way we did in
the past. The same people, situation, words or actions elicit the
same programmed reaction.
If we are going to change our reactions, we have to
change the internal references. The difficulty we encounter is
that the mind depends on these internal references to make
sense of the world in which we live. In this process our mind
tends to filter out anything which does not agree with an internal
reference. So the changing of an internal reference does not
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happen by accident; it must be done intentionally. This is what
an affirmation is designed to do: change the internal reference by
repeating the new desired thought or conclusion over and over
until it becomes the new internal reference. The way this works
in the inner mind is that a new place is created for the new
internal reference being programmed, and it exists right along
side of the old reference. The old reference has been repeated
thousands of times from repetitive actions of other people and
the repetitive times we have gone over the same thing in our
own mind. When the new reference builds up enough repetitive
support to equal the old reference, the inner mind will bring the
issue to the surface of our consciousness, in effect saying,
“These two things are in conflict and they have the same number
of inner references. Which one do you want to be the real
reference?” This gives us the opportunity to select the new real
inner reference. From that point on the new reference becomes
the action of choice and the old pattern is no longer followed.
Forgiveness follows the same pattern, but if we can see
where the old inner reference came from and realize it is a false
conclusion, it greatly shortens the repetitive process of re-
programming in the new reference. Realizing that our conclusion
about something is wrong attaches a strong negative association
with the old internal reference, lending strength and support to
the new reference. We will still have some of the same old
reactions, but we will usually quickly realize we are doing
something which is now “wrong” and will move to correct it as
soon as we can. The observation work of identifying the series of
thoughts and conclusions associated with a particular emotion,
and seeking where these thoughts and conclusions came from,
leads us to the time, place and conditions of the early formation
of the internal reference. Many times we can see that the thought
or conclusion was the judgment we held as a child, without the
maturity and experience we now have as an adult. It quickly
becomes clear to us that the old thought or conclusion was
wrong and needs to be corrected. This insight accelerates the re-
programming process by identifying the old internal reference as
“wrong”, replacing it with a new “correct” reference.
So how does this work exactly? If one of your parents
was an alcoholic and you were beaten as a child, how do you
change that? You can’t pretend it didn’t happen. It’s not the
event itself that is important; it’s our perception of ourself and our
role in what happened that is staying with us. We may believe
we were, or still are, bad, and that what happened was our fault.
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(“If I had been better, if I had done more, this wouldn’t have
happened.”)
In some instances we were so young that we may need
to ask some older family members about what went on in the
past. Getting an adult understanding of our past family dynamics
can shed a great deal of light on our perceptions. There may
have been a serious injury which prevented the father from
working, resulting in alcohol abuse and out-of-control anger. It
may have been abuse by a family member in another generation
which set the stage for what we experienced. The primary thing
we must remember is that the child is generally not the problem.
The adult is. The child is usually the available target for someone
else’s pain and anger. Realizing that we were not the cause of
what happened, just an available target, helps remove us as a
guilty party. We didn’t deserve what happened. We were not bad
or defective, we couldn’t perform as an adult because we were a
child; we were not responsible for what happened.
Once we realize an adult was responsible and not we as
children, it is important to come to the realization that people
perform very poorly in life. The hardest thing to grasp, however,
is that people are doing the best they can under the
circumstances. And yes, sometimes people’s best is really bad.
But the reality is if the individual in mind could actually have done
better, they would have done so. Life is not risk free; bad things
happen. The point is, what are we going to do about it now? The
reality is, the person who did these things to us may no longer be
alive, may not remember what he did, and more importantly may
not care. The other person is not important; what we are
experiencing (the pain and suffering) - that is what is important.
The point of forgiveness is not to change the other person, but to
stop the pain and suffering we are experiencing.
Realizing that we are not at fault is the first real step
toward resolution. The next step is seeing that a bad thing
happening to us is just another unfortunate aspect of life on
planet earth. We can forgive the person involved for acting out of
their own pain. Inside he may have been hurting more than we
were. We cannot change him or his pain, but we sure can
change the pain and suffering we experience. Forgiving the other
person starts the process. Forgiving ourself for our condemning
thoughts and conclusions breaks the connection to the past.
Using affirmations after forgiveness can help re-establish a new
perspective and a better self image.
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Every thought and conclusion needs to be examined and
re-evaluated based on our mature adult understanding and
wisdom. As we go through our belief system one item at a time,
we can gradually correct the thoughts and conclusions we made
as a child which are still running our life. You will find forgiving
someone else is easier than forgiving yourself. Start with
forgiving others first so you get used to the process. Then focus
your work on forgiving yourself. You will discover that 90% of the
work of forgiveness is forgiving yourself. You must forgive
yourself for all of the things you have done, and all of the things
you believe you should have done but failed to do. Remember in
the end, the judgment you give will be the judgment you receive.
When you have forgiven everything, you are truly forgiven. When
you are free of judging anything, you are free of being judged.
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distance or try seeing it in black and white rather than color. You
can also imagine it on a screen, as if it were a movie or on
television. Anything that reduces the intensity to the point where
you can do the exercise will help.
What if you can’t remember the actual event? The actual
event and the actual details are not as important as how you
perceived the event. Your reconstruction of the event only needs
to represent what you perceived. You can make up an event that
represents the actual event as you perceived it. The inner mind
does not know the difference between what we think is reality
and what actually occurred. We are really dealing with our
memories and perceptions, anyway.
Sometimes when forgiving an adult in these exercises
the adult will stiffen up and resist the forgiveness or being
hugged. It’s okay, just let it play out in your mind. This is
something which will need to be repeated a number of times.
The exercise may change as it is repeated. You may get
different insights into the workings of your own mind or
something totally unexpected may happen. Let the exercise play
out and observe what is happening.
After a number of repeated exercises on the same
event, you may feel it is time to move on to another event. The
nature of the inner mind is that it takes time to make the needed
changes. You can think of these changes taking place in layers,
like the layers of an onion. Each series of forgiveness exercises
resolves a layer, and when you go on to another event keep in
mind that you will return to this issue again in the future to
resolve another layer. Eventually you will discover that one or
more of your issues simply do not come up any more, even
when someone is pushing your buttons to get you going again.
When there is no internal reaction and you can remain peaceful
and focused on the present rather than being dragged into the
past, the issue is resolved. The number of layers depends on
how many times and how many different ways this issue has
been reinforced. The greater the repetition and the greater the
variety of ways this issue has been experienced, the more layers
there will be.
The time it takes to resolve an issue varies greatly from
one individual to the next. It takes as long as it takes. There is no
fixed time. The one thing you can be certain of is that if you
persist, you will succeed. The second half of the forgiveness
exercise deals with the emotions.
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The Transformation of Emotions
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captured a butterfly. Begin on one side of your body and
physically move your hands slowly over to the other side. While
you are doing this, change the emotion you are experiencing
over to love. In the beginning, and especially with strong
emotions, it will be very difficult to get to love. Don’t be overly
concerned. Just move the emotion as far as you can. There is a
point in the middle, the point of neutrality, where the emotion
seems to lose its character. During each exercise we want to
move the emotion more and more into love, past the point of
neutrality. Negative emotions used by the ego are all on the
same side of the point of neutrality. The love-based emotions
used by the spirit are on the other side of the point of neutrality.
Piece-by-piece we want to move all of the negative emotions
across the point of neutrality and into the love-based emotions.
As you conclude the exercise and stop feeling the
emotion, it solidifies in the form in which it was last experienced.
The anger experienced has been transformed into love and
stored as love in the body. The anger transformed no longer
exists as anger, only as love. The emotional energy is still there,
but its form has changed. As you do the forgiveness exercises
the thoughts and attitudes to the people in your life will start to
change. You will see them in a different light and your feelings
toward them will also change. As your thoughts and feelings
toward them change, your relationship with them will also
change. Some will move closer to you, and others will move
further away. Your life will change and so will your relationships.
Your real spiritual journey of transformation has begun.
The forgiveness exercise will have to be repeated a
number of times. With practice a complete forgiveness exercise
will take only 2 to 3 minutes. You can repeat the exercise or do a
series of exercises during your 20-minute exercise period. Do
not do the transformation of emotion exercises back-to-back. Do
the thought re-programming exercise in between. Work the
exercises in pairs: thought re-programming, and then emotional
transformation. Don’t be too surprised if you begin feeling tired
after the exercises. The inner work of transformation can be very
draining. Because of this you should not do this work for long
periods of time. Three sessions of 20 minutes each, spread out
over a day’s time, is a serious spiritual path.
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Resolving Inner Traumas
134
content, it no longer is a factor in our life. We have become free
of the past.
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lives. Piece-by-piece we transform our thoughts and feelings,
each step almost insignificant on its own, but the end result is
profound and completely life-changing. Step-by-step we enter
the Kingdom of God, changing our consciousness, our
awareness, and our life experience from the ordinary into the
extraordinary.
The inner experience of gnosis demonstrates to us that
Jesus was an ordinary person having an extraordinary
experience. That perspective becomes very clear to us as we,
too, begin having the insights and experiences that come with
the presence of God in our lives. As our life is transformed by the
flowing of God’s love through us, we begin to see the teachings
of Jesus in a more personal and intimate way. It’s not a matter of
just understanding the teachings of Jesus. In the end we
experience his teachings personally. We understand them
because we are living them. Jesus said, “follow me” and we
have. The Kingdom of Heaven is within, and we have entered,
becoming one with God and all of creation.
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have just imagined? Nothing is cast in concrete. The future is
yours to choose. The path of spiritual growth described in the
teachings of Jesus can bring you into the Kingdom of Heaven -
into the full presence of God and into His peace, love and joy. It’s
a system that has been working for 2,000 years, and it will work
for you.
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Recognizing the Christ
138
1
Out of Egypt, Ahmed Osman, Century – London, 1998, Pg 245.
2
Out of Egypt, Ahmed Osman, Century – London, 1998, Pg 244.
3
The Gospel of Thomas Annotated & Explained, Stevan Davies,
Skylight Paths Publishing, 2002. Pg 71.
4
The Gospel of Thomas – Unearthing the Lost Words of Jesus,
Dart & Riegert, Ulysses Press, 1998. Pg 44.
5
The Gospel of Thomas Annotated & Explained, Stevan Davies,
Skylight Paths Publishing, 2002. Pg 77.
6
The Gospel of Thomas – Unearthing the Lost Words of Jesus,
Dart & Riegert, Ulysses Press, 1998. Pg 46.
7
Gospel of Thomas Annotated & Explained, Stevan Davies,
Skylight Paths Publishing, 2002. Pg 79.
8
Gospel of Thomas Annotated & Explained, Stevan Davies,
Skylight Paths Publishing, 2002. Pg 104.
9
Jonathan Livingston Seagull, Richard Bach, Avon, 1973, Pg.
81.
10
Gurdjieff & Ouspensky, Maurice Nicoll, Shambhala, 1984.
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Available 2008