721 Feedback: Consensus Reality Dreamland
721 Feedback: Consensus Reality Dreamland
721 Feedback: Consensus Reality Dreamland
Consensus Reality
Dreamland
Essence
All of us are, or will one day be, in the position of giving feedback to others
whether we are teachers, bosses, parents, or simply friends giving advice to
one another. Over the years I have developed into a teacher and supervisor
of other therapists and therapists-in-training and have found that, for me,
the task of giving feedback carries as much excitement and learning as it is
daunting and challenging. There is always more to learn about how to teach
and give feedback in useful ways.
but does not really hear anything -- except the critics incessant voice, that
is! The critics opinions are like a semi transparent cloud that overlays and
colors the momentary situation.
Interference in communication by one figure or another is more common
than not. In fact, because of the complex nature of supervision and feedback
it is rare in such situations that only the supervisor and supervisee are
present in the room! All sorts of figures may be in the atmosphere such as a
nasty demon, a loving and supportive elder, a playful child, a depressed
person, or even a jealous colleague! Even if they are not directly focused
upon, these figures will subtly influence and disturb both of the individuals
involved.
You might ask why it is important to notice these dreamland figures in such
learning situations. Dreamlike moods and figures have a powerful influence
and are, therefore, crucial aspects of the learning process. They can
enhance, disturb, or cloud the momentary situation for all. An astute
supervisor will notice dream figures that are present and bring them into the
feedback process. He or she will know that the moment of learning and
feedback is a complex mixture of all of the parties, moods, and figures
involved and that when focused upon usefully, in addition to consensual
elements of feedback, the overall learning process will be enriched. I will give
some examples below, but let us first take a peak at the realm of the
Essence.
The Essence level takes us to yet another dimension of feedback. In
general, the essence refers to the deepest part of us: an aspect of ourselves
that encompasses and embraces all of our parts. Arny calls this part of each
of us, the Big U.6 In embodied form, it is something like a wise elder inside
of us that includes, yet is greater than the sum of, all of our parts. The Big U
has a compassionate attitude that embraces all
the various aspects of ourselves and a sense of
detachment that comes from being connected
with something greater than the momentary
events of life; a sense of eternity outside of
ordinary time and space. A playful image of the
elder is the octopus (right), which is deep in the
sea, has arms to embrace all the various sides,
yet is more than the sum of all of them. In
order to get close to our essence as supervisors,
we need the capacity to slip a bit into an altered state and to feel the deepest
part of ourselves. There are many methods to do this and I will mention
some of them a bit later.
In supervision, using the Essence means that the supervisor gets in contact
with the deepest part of her or himself and lets feedback flow from this
aspect of her nature to the supervisee. In fact, the supervisors Big U is her
or his best teacher. When she looks through the eyes of this deep part of
herself she can speak to the depths of the supervisee as well.
The supervisors can speak from this Essence level in a given moment or the
feeling quality of the Essence can be used as a basic metaskill from which all
feedback occurs (including that of CR and Dreamland). In recent seminars,
we have seen that feedback at all levels is best conveyed and also received
when it emerges from the Big U of the supervisor. When the supervisor
comes from her own deepest essence, the act of supervision transforms well
beyond the typical realms of the good or bad abilities of the supervisee.
Rather, whatever feedback occurs is embedded in a larger context that
embraces the momentary learning as well as the wholeness and depth of the
learner.
You may be wondering if it is then possible to give negative feedback to the
supervisee. Actually, the Big U makes such feedback easier and more
effective. The Big U makes it possible for the supervisor to feel freer about all
the various aspects of her feedback because they will be conveyed through
the feeling quality of her or his Big U attitude. For example, Arny has said
that when negative feedback such as I think you are not doing well at a
particular skill comes from a Big U feeling, it is communicated with a sense
of detachment and therefore does not carry the normal sting that such
information usually carries. The most painful feedback often occurs when the
supervisor is not feeling detached but is intensely invested in what she is
saying. And of course all of us have that from time to time! That is natural,
too, and I have been through this many times! However, if complex or
difficult feedback is said with the metaskill of detachment, the supervisee will
get the message that she or he should learn something but that she/he is a
creative and deep individual nonetheless with her or his own path and
process.
Deep democracy emphasizes the equal importance of all three levels. They
are like parallel worlds7 occurring simultaneously though we often tend to
focus only on one and disregard the others. This marginalization of particular
levels is natural, but to really connect as a teacher or supervisor, feedback at
all dimensions is needed. However, exactly how and when a supervisor will
use these levels depends on her or his particular style and the momentary
feedback situation.
Local and Nonlocal Supervision: Learning Together
Arny has described the difference between local and nonlocal supervision.
Consensus reality is local, meaning that you are you, and I am I. We are
separate individuals. However, in Dreamland and in the Essence worlds
events are nonlocal; that is, in dreamland dream figures and experiences are
shared and do not belong to any one individual. He calls this phenomenon
Non-Consensus Reality (NCR).8
Most of us are familiar with the local style of supervision or education. The
teacher is the teacher. The student is the student. In nonlocal supervision,
the roles are not set or fixed but are shared by all. In nonlocal supervision,
feedback that I give to you also applies to me in some way. We are both
teachers and learners simultaneously. Both viewpoints, local and nonlocal,
are important in the feedback process.
Here is an example of nonlocal supervision that some may be aware of.
Imagine that a supervisor tells a supervisee a number of times that she or he
should learn a particular thing. In consensus reality the teacher is teaching
something and the student is trying to learn it. Lets say, that with consistent
reminders and discussions, the supervisee does not seem to learn or pick up
the new information no matter how many times he or she is told to do so.
The supervisor becomes frustrated and has an affect and insists that the
student learn that particular thing!
In such a situation, if the supervisor cannot get out of her affect, then it is
time to consider that the learning problem is shared. While it may be very
true that the supervisee needs to learn something, at the same time the
supervisor should consider that she herself might need that learning as well! 9
If a supervisor insists repeatedly, for example, that a student-therapist be
more direct and less mothering with her clients, the supervisor probably has
the same difficulty with her own clients.
Here is another example of nonlocal supervision. In one of my supervision
sessions, I noticed a critic in the air who was plaguing a
supervisee. However, I also realized that I was feeling quite
inhibited myself and that this critic was bothering me as well!
We both agreed that there was a nasty spirit in the air. I
decided to place one of the many puppets I have in my office,
a green demon with a nasty scowl on its face, on the ground
to represent the role of the critic. Both the supervisee and I
took turns moving the critics head and speaking its words and
criticizing our work. As we played with this figure, we broke out into laughter.
We realized that both of us had been feeling shy with one another and that
the critic showed us that we needed more of its intense energy. The
supervisee needed to be more direct with her clients and I needed to be
more direct about my feedback!
Simply sharing and admitting that you, the supervisor, have similar
difficulties and problems as the supervisee can be very helpful, alleviate
some of the rank differences between you, and create more learning for all.
2/3 of the Teacher is Inside, 1/3 Outside
The idea that the teacher and student are shared roles is quite important.
While an outside supervisor or teacher is obviously crucial for learning,
it is helpful to remember that each individuals best teacher is her or
his own process. No outer teacher will ever be as good as, or as
helpful as, a persons own inner process. The persons inner teacher is,
and will always be, the best guide in all things. In essence, Arny has
said that 2/3 of the teacher is inside the student and 1/3 of the
teacher comes from the outer teacher. The individuals inner teacher
(her or his own Big U) knows things that no one else can teach her or
him. A supervisor who is aware of this will enlist the supervisees inner
teacher as a guide and helper. Perhaps the supervisee can step out
and supervise herself at one point or another in order to help bring
this inner wisdom to the fore.
Recognizing Dreamland Figures
The exact information that each supervisor conveys in Consensus Reality is
dependent upon the particular therapeutic paradigm that he or she is working
in, and the individual nature and focus of a given
supervisor. Therefore, I will not go into greater detail
about CR feedback. I would however like to expand
upon methods for gaining access to the Dreamland
and Essence worlds and a few ways to use that
awareness usefully in the supervision interaction.
Stepping into the realm of dreamland is one of my
favorite activities! It gives me a chance to drop out
of my ordinary mind and allow other information
and figures to arise. For some this is a natural process while for others it is
quite a stretch to momentarily drop consensual thoughts and notice a dream
figure in the moment.
Therefore, a diversity of methods that match the supervisors style and
nature are needed. Some discover dream figures by listening exactly to the
content of what a person says, others use a kind of shamanic altered state to
imagine figures, and still others observe a persons body signals for clues. In
any case, it takes a slight shift in awareness to open up to and notice the
other figures that are in the midst of a supervision session.
The basic idea is that something about the figures energy or essence or the
interaction with this figure is important to the persons learning process. For
example, it is possible that the person realizes that he needs to stand up to a
negative critic and defend his way of doing things. Or, he or she might need
to integrate some of the critics (or another figures) energy or essence. (The
essence means the very root or seed of a figure, not just its overt
manifestation. For example, the root of a critical voice might be exactness
or one-pointedness.)
who sat up straight, raised her chin slightly, and had slight smile on
her face as our supervision began. When I asked her what these
signals were expressing, she said that she felt a sense of pride in her
work. In fact, she felt like superwoman!
Letting Yourself Dream About Figures In The Atmosphere
Another helpful method for discovering ghosts, particularly
for those who do not focus on signals and content but who
are more accustomed to, or enjoy, altered and shamanic
states is to shift into a slight foggy state of consciousness
and imagine dream figures in the atmosphere. This is one of
my favorite methods.
For example, in one of my supervision sessions, I
suddenly imagined a monkey sitting on the back of my
supervisee! I was really shy to say this but the
supervisee was eager to hear my nutty imagination.
When I told her, she said that she had dreamed
repeatedly of a monkey as a child. This monkey was capable of being
playful and taking it easy. When I asked her to imagine bringing more
of these monkey qualities into her work and her learning she was
delighted and felt that a heavy weight of seriousness lifted.
In another session, I imagined a jolly green giant in the atmosphere
who wanted to voice his opinion of support for the therapists work!
You never know what might arise!
If your imagination is not correct, let the person correct you or wait for
another image to arise.
Noticing Dreamland Figures From Your Own Feelings And Behavior
Another method for discovering ghosts is to become aware of your own
feelings and behavior and how those feelings indicate other figures that are
in the ethers of the learning atmosphere.
For example, I recall a supervision session in which the supervisee said
that he needed to learn many things and wanted me to give him very
direct feedback about his work. However, when the time came for me
to comment about his work, I hesitated to say anything negative to
him. As I studied my feelings, I realized that I felt protective and
wanted to care for the supervisee. I decided to meta-communicate
about my feelings (that is, talk about my experiences) to the
supervisee. I said to him, I know you want me to tell you my opinions
about your learning very directly and I would like to do that, but is
there something forbidding me from saying anything negative to you?
Is a mothering or a protective spirit in the atmosphere that wants to
keep off any potentially difficult information?
The supervisees insisted that he wanted to hear what I was thinking
but after I hesitated once again he insisted that he had had many
(or its essence) might be a significant aspect of your friends process and
part of your own process as well.
Essence Feedback: A Basic Metaskill for all Dimensions
Giving feedback from the Essence level means that the supervisor connects
with her deepest self and allows feedback to flow from this inner feeling
about the supervisee. Sometimes I experience the
Big U as if it were carrying me and showing me
what to do and say to the other person.
The supervisor can give Essence feedback in a
given moment or as the basis for all feedback that
she conveys. As mentioned previously, all feedback
including CR and Dreamland feedback, is best given and received when it
comes from and is embedded in the supervisors Big U state. Therefore, it is
helpful if the supervisor is able to get in touch with her Big U at the
beginning of her or his supervision session.
There are many ways to get in contact with your deep essence. Here are a
couple of methods:
Relax And Remember The State Of Sleep
Relax and imagine that you sink into the state of sleep. From this deep
dreaming mind in yourself begin to speak and give feedback to your
supervisee.
Put Yourself in the Service of a Greater Mind
Imagine putting yourself in the service of a greater mind such as the earth,
the universe, the spirit, etc, depending upon what image and feeling is right
for you. Let go of yourself, feel yourself being moved by this greater mind,
and from this inner feeling begin to speak to the supervisee.
Discover the Big U in Your Body
Discover your Big U by asking yourself where the deepest part of you is
located in your body. Take time to feel it there in that part of your body.
When you are ready, still sensing this part of yourself, turn and find the
direction on earth or in your room that this feeling is drawn towards or is
most closely associated with.11 When you have found it, take a few steps
there, feel the meaning of that direction, and make a gesture that captures
the significance of that path. Now, ask yourself, what type of style this
feeling, direction, and meaning are recommending for you as a supervisor or
therapist. Imagine how you would act, how you would relate as a supervisor
with that style and feeling. Make a quick sketch of this gesture and put a few
words next to it to capture its meaning. If you can, take this paper with you
to your supervision sessions to remind you of this deep part of yourself.
When I asked myself recently about the deepest part of me, I sensed it in my
chest and the feeling went towards Kenya. As I walked in that direction, I
recalled the shamanic ceremony that Arny and I had participated in there.
The people were extremely loving and shamanic. As a supervisor I imagined
being very open and warmhearted about what I would say and at the same
time a bit unpredictable and dreamy, allowing my shamanic nature to
express itself through the realms of Dreamland and the Essence.
Here are a few examples of giving feedback from the Essence
In one situation, after giving CR and Dreamland feedback to a
supervisee, I sank further into my Big U and began to speak. I said
that while the therapist-in-training was struggling to learn various
things there was also something very earthy about him that would
never be altered or destroyed and that would be his greatest gift in his
work with others. The therapist felt that I had touched upon something
that he cherished about himself but rarely focused on, and that he
could use this earthy feeling more in conjunction with his skills.
In another situation, as I began to give feedback to a woman therapist
from my Big U, I felt myself becoming very quiet and respectful. I felt
there was something else I needed to say before I could speak about
her skills. I realized that she had a certain presence of heart that, from
my Big U perspective, needed to be honored and respected. The
woman said that she had always been aware of a big loving presence
inside of her. She meditated on this feeling for a moment and said that
contact with this feeling reconnected her with her initial reason for
becoming a therapist. She said she had lost contact with this side of
herself and that remembering it now gave her a deeper reason for
what she was doing and would support her overall growth and
learning.
In addition to the therapist being close to her Big U, it is very helpful if the
supervisee is able to be close to her Big U as well during the supervision
interaction. From the supervisees Essence state of mind, he will hear the
feedback perhaps in a new way (through the eyes and ears of her Big U),
may feel more fluid with the feedback situation, and will also be able to give
himself feedback from his deepest self.
A Few Tips For Doing 721 Feedback
The following is a basic 721 Feedback Exercise that you can practice with
friends, supervisees, colleagues, etc. Before describing the exercise, let me
mention a couple of helpful tips.
Follow The Momentary Process
Supervision is an interaction more than anything else. The supervisor says
something, the supervisee responds in some way, the supervisor notices
feedback, etc. The process has its own natural and organic method of
unfolding that involves the consciousness of all parties, though the supervisor
in this case ideally has more awareness and will use it to the benefit of the
supervises.
Therefore, the following exercise is meant as a strict linear process that must
be followed step by step. For example, in Part II, you might skip to
Dreamland feedback first due to a dream figure popping up strongly in the
moment. Then you might flow to CR feedback, or to the Essence, etc. The
whole process has to do with your ability to notice feedback, to interact with
the supervisee/therapist, and to flow with the various levels as they arise.
Ideally, the supervisor will address all levels but follow the momentary
process to determine what actually occurs. Most importantly, please use this
exercise to practice your fluidity as a supervisor.
State The Level You Are Speaking From
A rudimentary lesson for 721 Feedback is to notice and speak about the level
you are addressing in any given moment. For example, if you are giving
factual CR information that you are interested in the person learning, state
that you are speaking for the moment on the level of Consensus Reality. If
you drop into the Essence, state that as well. Make it clear that you are
shifting to one of the levels and will return to the others in due time.
Everyone In Every Position Learns And Teaches
The principle of nonlocality tells us that everyone is a teacher and everyone
is a learner. Therefore, one of the steps of the exercise asks the supervisor to
consider how the information that he or she is recommending to the therapist
are also true for him or herself as well. I also include one further step and
request that everyone in the triad give feedback to one another. The
therapist can give feedback to the supervisor, the client can give feedback to
therapist, etc. In my classes, many people seemed to enjoy this roundtable
style of learning.
360 Degree Feedback: The Powerful New Model for Employee Assessment and Performance Maintenance
by Mark R. Edwards and Ann J. Ewen, American Management Assoc., New York, 1996, p.25.
2
The term 360 feedback comes from the analogy to a compass: A circle with 360 points of reference used
to determine and monitor direction. 360 feedback provides performance data from multiple points of
reference, not just one. Like a compass, it is a navigational tool that more accurately tell when one is on or
off course. It can fill the gaps that invariably exist between how one sees himself and how others see him.
Its' purpose is, first, to gain deeper insight into how individual, and others, see the performance and, second,
to reinforce and accelerate the need for continuous development. From:
http://www.bnet.com/abstract.aspx?scid=1539&sortby=title&docid=72256
3
Edwards and Ewen, p.5.
4
See Arnys Leader as Martial Artist, HarperCollins, New York, 1992, pp.5-6, 154-155.
5
See my book, Metaskills: The Spiritual Art of Therapy, Lao Tse Press, Portland, OR, 2001.
6
See his Dreaming While Awake, Hampton Roads, Charlottesville, 2000, pp. 200-206.
7
Arnys speaks about parallel worlds in quantum physics; particularly Hugh Everetts many worlds
interpretation. See his Quantum Mind chapter 18 pp. 227-236 and my article Amys Hyperspaces:
Creativity, the Bird of Paradise, and the Doorway to Parallel Worlds on this website at
http://www.aamindell.net/research_frame.htm.
8
See his Dreaming While Awake, Hampton Roads, Charlottesville, 2000, p.47.
9
From our earlier research and from my classes on the interface between learning skills and personal style
we have discovered that if a person is unable to learn something over time, this usually indicates that there
is a gift behind the learning difficulty that is not yet recognized. Only when this gift is valued will it potentially
allow the blocked learning to occur. See my Alternative to Therapy, Newport, Oregon: 2002, pp. 314 - 315
for more on this.
10
See Arnys The Leader as Martial Artist p.36 and my Alternative to Therapy, Chapter 9, pp. 93-101 for
more on ghosts.
11
See Arnys upcoming book (to be published) Cosmic Path Walker: The Teachings of Don Juan, Richard
Feynman and Lao Tse in Shamanism, Physics, and Community for more on directional awareness.