Thesis Statement Intro and Conclusion

The Introductory Paragraph:
An introductory paragraph has two parts, general statements and the thesis statement.
General statements: (a) introduce the general topic of the essay.
(b) capture the reader’s interest.
SAMPLE:
Moving to a new country can be an exciting, even exhilarating experience. In a new
environment, you somehow feel more alive. Seeing new sights, eating new food, hearing
the foreign sounds of a new language, and feeling a different climate against your skin
stimulate your senses as never before. Soon, however, this sensory bombardment
becomes sensory overload. Suddenly, new experiences seem stressful rather than
stimulating, and delight turns into discomfort. This is the phenomenon known as cultural
shock. Cultural shock is more than jet lag or homesickness, and it affects nearly everyone
who enters a new culture – tourists, business travelers, diplomats, and students alike.
Although not everyone experiences cultural shock in exactly the same way, many experts
agree that it has roughly five stages.
The sample above is a funnel introduction. This introduction is so called because it is

shaped like a funnel – wide at the top and narrow at the bottom. It begins with one
or two very general sentences about the topic. Each subsequent sentence becomes
increasingly focused on the topic until the last sentence, which states very specifically
what the essay is about, where the thesis statement is placed.
Thesis Statement
1. The thesis statement is the most important sentence in the introduction. It states the specific topic of
the essay. It is also normally the last sentence in the introductory paragraph.
Young people in my culture have less freedom than young people in the United States.
2. Sometimes a thesis statement lists the subtopics that will be discussed in the body.
Young people in my culture have less freedom than young people in the United States in
their choice of where they live, whom they marry, and what their job is.
3. Sometimes a thesis statement also indicates the pattern of organization that the essay will follow.
Which of the following thesis statements indicates chronological order? Logical division of ideas?
Comparison/contrast?
When buying a used car, use these four strategies to get the best price.
There are several differences between a nurse practitioner and a physician’s assistant.
My best friend and I spent an entire semester break constructing a tree house in
my grandmother’s old tree.
Thesis Statement Pitfalls

1. The thesis is too general.
Too General >> A college education is a good investment.
Improved >> A college education is a good investment for four reasons.
2. The thesis makes a simple announcement.

Announcement >> I am going to write about sports injuries.
Improved >> Avoid sports injuries by taking a few simple precautions.
3. The thesis states an obvious fact.

Obvious Fact >> The Internet is a communication superhighway.
Improved >> The explosion of the Internet has had both positive and negative consequences.
The Concluding Paragraph
The conclusion is the final paragraph in an essay. It has three purposes.

1. It signals the end of the essay. To do so, begin your conclusion with a transition signal.
For example: in conclusion, in summary, in brief, all in all, to summarize, to conclude
2. It reminds your reader of your main points, which you can do in one of two ways:
 summarize your subtopics
 paraphrase your thesis
3. It leaves your reader with your final thoughts on the topic. This is your opportunity to convey
a strong, effective message that your reader will remember.
Among the techniques that you can use to write a memorable conclusion are:
 make a prediction
 suggest results or consequences
 suggest a solution, make a recommendation, or call for action
 quote an authority on the topic
SAMPLE:
In conclusion, nearly everyone moving to a new country feels some degree of culture
shock. Symptoms may vary, and not all people experience all five stages. Newcomers
with a strong support group may feel at home immediately in the new culture, while
others may take months to feel comfortable. Staying in touch with friends and family,
keeping a positive attitude, and, above all, learning the languages as soon as possible
are ways to overcome the difficulties and frustrations of adapting to life in a new land.
taken from Writing Academic English

Alice Oshima
Ann Hogue

Thesis Statement Intro and Conclusion

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The Introductory Paragraph:

The sample above is a funnel introduction. This introduction is so called because it is

Thesis Statement Pitfalls

2. The thesis makes a simple announcement.

3. The thesis states an obvious fact.

The Concluding Paragraph

The conclusion is the final paragraph in an essay. It has three purposes.

taken from Writing Academic English

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