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Personality Development and Human Relations

PERSONALITY DEVELOPMENT
TOPIC 1

Personality begins developing even before birth and it takes a lifetime

struggle to shape one into a wholesome and well balanced personality. High self
esteem and self fulfillment are the most important goals an individual can
achieve and only via maximized personality development.

Unlimited promises, happiness, excitements, and complexities abound for

us; thus living in this world becomes exciting, challenging, and fulfilling. Man is
the greatest of all resources. Natural resources such as mines, minerals, and
nature such as rivers, forests, seas will be useless without the technical
knowhow of man. Man is endowed with intelligence.

Characteristics like industriousness, resourcefulness, resiliency, and

creativity make man the best gift to environment.

On the other hand, man’s potential will remain dormant without the
action of his environment. Both human and environmental factors are partners
in the development of man. The process man, the creative man, the self trusting
man and the courageous man are the kinds of men most fitted in this fast
changing world.

Meanings of Personality

 It is the embodiment of feelings and behavior which make man the

unique person that he is.
 Sewey and Humber defines it as the way an individual is interrelated
through his ideas, actions and attitudes with the many non human
aspects of his environment and his biological heritage.
 It is the overall pattern or integration of a person’s structure, modes of
behavior, attitudes, aptitudes, interests, intellectual abilities and may
other distinguishable personality traits.
 It is the conglomeration of the following components; physical self,
intelligence, character traits, attitudes, habits, interests, personal
discipline , moral values, principles and philosophies of life.
 It refers to the total person in his overt and covert behavior.

In this very competitive world, some people desire to move forward by

Stepping on the feet of others; good friends are given up in competitions,
relatives are set aside and former associates become bystanders when they
attain positions in a company.

However, when accomplishments have fallen short of their aspirations,

people react differently. Some try to do better; some are discouraged and give
up; some resort to some form of defense mechanism.
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It is at this crucial point of a person’s life when he is beset with conflicts in

being tired and tested, but he must not allow himself even for a moment to
succumb to weakness. Instead he should show to the world that he is a fighter
and steadfast, firm and strong to meet the challenges.

A man consists of three selves. One is the self which the person thinks he
is, the second is what others think about him, and the third is the true real self.

The Id, Ego, and Superego

Sigmund Freud says that the organization of the total personality depends
upon psychodynamics. Psychodynamics explain human behavior in terms of
man’s inner motivations based on his origin.

It is the harmonious functioning of the ID, EGO, and SUPEREGO, which

merge together to form one’s personality.

ID - it is the most primitive of the three forces, the world exists to

provide him pleasure, happiness and satisfaction. All his drives and desires are
released without inhibitions and prohibitions. He follows the principle of
pleasure.

When the person is ID-dominated, he becomes aggressive, spoiled, self

centered, arrogant, and selfish, and always wants to profit in any undertaking.

EGO - it prevails over the ID when a child becomes exposed to

environmental constraints. A child’s tendencies are tempered because of his
exposure to parental prohibitions, social norms and conduct, school training and
teachings, and peer’s standards and influences.

The child reasoning begins to operate and to control the primitive

energies. The individual will forego his immediate satisfaction in conformity
with society so that greater pleasures later are assured.

SUPEREGO - it is the third psychic force. When the child grows and has
absorbed many parental prohibitions and sanctions and moral concepts, a part of
his ego becomes his third force.

This is now the conscience on establishes what is right and what is wrong.
It becomes the original moral foundation of behavior. It becomes the original
moral foundation of behavior. It sets goals or standards which the ego is
compelled to follow.

When the forces are in harmony with each other, there is happiness and
wholesome adjustment, but when they are in conflict with each other, the results
are tensions and anxieties.
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Components of Personality

The components of personality are; habits, attitudes, interests, values,

principles, and intellectual capacities.

Habits - are actions so often repeated at regular intervals until they

become fixed characteristics.

Going to church every Sunday, brushing one’s teeth after every meal,
bathing every day are examples of habits.

But before an action can become a habit, a person should first know and
assess if the action is worthwhile keeping. Once habits are formed, they are
difficult to unlearn. The habits of smoking, taking drugs, gambling, and drinking
are difficult to unlearn.

Behavior modification is the technique most feasible and recommendable

in correcting negative habits.

Attitudes - are certain ways of viewing things as ingrained,

acquired, and developed through the years of exposure to man’s family, school
and community.

Immediate older members of the family who pattern their behavior after
their father and mother greatly influence the attitude of young children, whose
early acquisition of attitudes becomes deep, thus these impressions leave an
indelible mark in the subconscious.

Interest - is that natural inclination to focus one’s concern

towards a specific area of work.

The inherent aspect is predisposed, but it is greatly influenced through

environmental stimulation. Exposures at an early age are carried through the
years in a family setting, school, and community, gradually shaping the interest
of the adult.

A family of teachers inevitably influence the interests of the child toward

teaching. The developed interest makes the job lighter for him.

Values - are ways of upholding certain priorities in

accordance with the hierarchy of needs by Abraham Maslow.

Values are best learned and reinforced through actual practice, actions
and application in one’s everyday life. One’s value system can be assessed by
making one choose his priorities among money career, love, religion, education
or family.
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Principles - are guides to a person in making judgments. The

individual is consistent in his application of these principles which are in
consonance with his norms of morality.

The child during his growing years is not passive reactor to events. He is
full of action and energy to make things happen. He always has fresh and new
ways to looking things.

Examples of principles

Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadows.

What you can do tomorrow will depend largely on your thinking today.

You cannot change the world of man without changing his mind, and you
cannot change his mind without changing his heart.

Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.

Work spares us from three great evils; boredom, vice, and need.

If you like your work, you work no more. For work, when you like it, is
work no longer but sheer enjoyment.

Intellectual capacities - is an innate faculty of the mind which

gives him the power to discern, to recognize and to comprehend.

It is through the intellect that knowledge is acquired. A longer span of

concentration, accuracy of perception, absorption of ideas, and assimilation are
gauges of one’s intellect.

? Questions
1. How pliant (flexible) is your personality?
2. How does personality affects business and industry?

Developing one’s personality

Although heredity sets the limit of one’s development in personality, the

environment provides the greater influence. The individual determines how he
can maximize the development of his personality through the opportunities
available to him.

Self awareness - indicates what kind of person you are. Are

you active, fast moving or slow? Are you dynamic and full of optimism,
stereotyped, conservati
ve or pessimistic?
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Assessment of personal assets and liabilities - is based on

factors such intelligence, talents, industriousness, resourcefulness, flexibilities,
and physical attractiveness. Just as in a business enterprise, the more enterprise,
the more assets and the more profit, all things being equal.

Personal growth - growing and learning continuously and

consistently means total development. Opportunities to learn and to grow are
available to each one as he gets in touch with environmental stimulations that
we meet in the home, school, church and community.

Personal effectiveness - means how useful you are, not only to

yourself but also to other people. “No one is an island,” as sayin goes. One cannot
live alone in a room and exempt himself from problems and challenges in society.

How unselfish we can be toward our brethren in the attainment of their

goals will speak for the personal effectiveness of each one of us.

Reasons for Developing Personality

The development of our personality is our great responsibility. Some

reasons why there is a need for developing personality are:

1. Social Acceptance - It is the third need in the Filipino hierarchy of

needs. It is the desire to be treated in accordance with one’s status. It is one of
an individual’s most important values. The better the personality of a person
the more friends he acquires.

2. Self Satisfaction - We feel not only comfortable but also happy when
we have a good personality. A happy person meets the bad temper and unkind
dispositions of others with understanding and good humor. When people reject
us because we are careless with our personality, the condition hinders our
growth.

3. Self Confidence - When we are aware that we have a pleasing

personality, we have the confidence to face anybody. It elicits positive feelings
which are necessary for mental health. We develop negative feelings like feelings
of inferiority when we are aware that our personality is not as good as that of
others.

4. To keep ourselves on the job - Personality has a great deal to do

with holding a job. In the business field, for example, a salesman has to deal with
people and influence them favorably toward the product the he is selling. The
salesman should have a good appearance and he should show his motives, his
ideals, and his good ways of approaching and motivating the people to buy his
products.
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? Questions
1. What is the significance of one’s personality, to his personal life, social life, and
professional life?

FOUNDATIONS OF PERSONALITY
TOPIC 2

The interplay of heredity and environment in the development of an

individual’s knowledge and skills are so inherently important that both factors
leave traces and marks on the individual that make him distinct from others.

Aspects of an Individual’s Personality

1. Mental Aspect - Refers to the intellectual capacity. How a person

talks, the range of ideas he expresses, and the things he talks about, as well as his
values and mental alertness give evidence of mental capacity.

2. Emotional Aspect - A person’s emotional makeup is shown in his likes

and dislikes, whether he is aggressive or docile, how he responds when things
become difficult, how quickly he is given to anger, or whether he can take a job
or not.

A child who engages himself in free play is given the opportunity to

release fears, resentments, and frustrations resulting from a too rigid control of
his behavior or unfavorable environmental conditions.

3. Social Aspect - This is seen in how well a person conducts himself

with other people and how well he observes the rules of etiquette that govern
society.

Social attitudes and behaviors are affected by physiological conditions

and changes, mental alertness, and the extent of emotional maturity. If these
social habits develop smoothly, they can function satisfactorily in the child’s
social environment and will produce a socially adaptable person who is
equipped to meet adequately the various situations in which he finds himself.

Factors affecting social development

1. Socio economic status - the higher the socio economic status, the
higher is the cultural background of family members. Adults with average or
above average socio economic status have gone to higher education; thus they
have the capability to understand the psychological and physiological needs of a
child.
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2. The level of maturity - it will determine the extent of assimilation he

can do, given a social situation. As psychologists state, the higher the higher the
intelligence, the higher is the level of maturity of the individual.

3. The family cultural background - the family as the basic unit of society
provides the laboratory for the socialization of the child. The style of life in areas
of socialization is a strong determinant for a child’s foundation as far as social
development is concerned.

4. Physical Aspect. - heredity and environment determine the entire

physiological system of an individual. Posture, body build and size, complexion
and facial expressions, as well as the appropriateness and condition of clothes,
comprise the physical appearance of a person.

5. Moral Aspect of Personality - this aspect of personality has to do

with a person’s awareness of the difference between what is wrong or right.

6. Spiritual Aspect of Personality - People are generally religious but they

differ in what they worship and how they worship. From moral lectures they
hear their respective leaders, priests, or pastors, they acquire knowledge of the
teaching of their Creator that guide the lives of men.

? Questions
1. What is the role of heredity and environment in the total personality
development of the individual?
2. What are the aspects of personality?
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PHYSICAL ATTRIBTUES OF PERSONALITY

TOPIC 3

Personality has characteristics or attributes. These are the external

attributes and the inner ones.

External attributes

First impressions are registered when people meet. A beautiful face can
be ruined by a poor posture or a careless hairdo, although not ever pretty face
can be set off by well chose clothes or meticulous grooming. A well modulated
voice reverberates longer, while communication with positive notes leaves an
indelible mark.

The external attributes include physical health and hygiene, grooming,

accessories, make up, posture, and the use of color combinations. Physical health
and hygiene include care of skin, hair, eyes, and the brain; exercise, and nutrition.
Grooming includes dressing, accessories, jewelry, bags and shoes, and make up.
External attributes also include posture, use of color combinations, and
communication skills.

Exercises for the mind are:

1. Planning and organizing ideas.

2. Memorizing lines of poetry
3. Learning a new language
4. Writing about certain subjects a few minutes a day.
5. Reading to sharpen mental skills
6. Developing skills in problem solving through puzzles, scrabble and
computer games.

Activity

Memorize and present sample poetry.

? Questions
1. What impression will you have of a newcomer in your school who has an
excellent posture?
2. What impression will you have of a boy or girl with drooping shoulders,
sagging abdomen, and a depressed chest?

Good Posture

First impression is lasting. Male and female applicants are often judged by
employers by the way they stand, sit and walk. People think that a boy or girl
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who sits straight, stands tall, and walks well is alert and will be a capable worker.
Good health and good posture go together.

Good posture - It is a state which enables the body to function to the best
advantage.

There is no one best posture for everyone. Everyone is built differently

from another; hence people have different postures. Work that gives satisfaction
helps improve posture. Success helps posture.

There is a story about a husband who had a very poor posture. His wife
brought him to a doctor. The doctor right away gave him a medal to wear and the
man at once began to stand up straight.

Good posture gives a feeling of confidence. Bad posture accelerates

fatigue.

Psychology of colors

Colors have profound effects upon our lives. They set the mood or
ambience. They are outward expressions of how to feel- whether lonely, happy,
brave, strong, dull, sexy, decisive or bored.

Dark color according to Linda Clark harm our spirits, morale and physical
health. They also instigate crime, induce inhibitions, inferiority complex and
suicide.

Yellow- makes one feel happy and carefree.

Read - makes a person strong, dynamic and courageous, it is associated
with blood , rosy cheeks, or the “stop” traffic sign, it likewise signifies anger and
provokes fear.
Orange - it helps a person to be assertive.
Green - the color of nature, promotes the feeling of well being, it implies
stability, happy and restful associations and natural abundance.
Black - it has negative connotations. It depresses because of its association
with death. At present black is becoming fashionable especially on formal
occasions. It also signifies formality and conservativeness.
Blue - it connotes royalty and regalness.

? Questions
1. How significant is physical hygiene to personality
2. What is a balanced personality?
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PERSONALITY TRAITS
TOPIC 4

The inner self is composed of the various components of personality.

These are habits, attitudes, character, interests, values, principles, and
intellectual capacities.

The Work Values of Filipino Workers

A research program conducted by a group led by A.J. Carlota, Dept of

Psychology , UP, revealed that work was looked upon as providing a challenge,
stimulation and opportunity for exercising autonomy; that work provides
maintenance needs which include income, security and satisfactory relationship
with co workers.

Filipinos here in our country and abroad have proven their mettle in work
output. The difference, however, is that here in our country, Filipino workers are
not give the right incentives, recognition and compensation.

Here are some of the values specifically demonstrated in Filipino business

and industry.

1. Pakikisama (Introjection). Filipinos usually say “mabuti na ‘yung

nakikisama” by doing something good for others.

Since the Spaniards stayed longer in the Philippines, they had

greater influences over the Filipinos than the Americans. A group of
students were interviewed during merienda time in one of the snack
houses at Teresa Street, Sta. Mesa. “Why are you carrying the tray for
the whole barkada while they just remain seated, chatting and
giggling?” The girl retorted, “Well there’s nothing wrong with what I
am doing. After all they are my friends and mabuti na ang
nakikisama.”

2. Pakikitungo (Compensation). We observed in a snack house along

Teresa Street, Sta. Mesa that though the place was not very pleasant
and attractive, still it was full of customers because the saleslady
received them with warmth and enthusiasm. The customers tend to
invite more friends and patronize the place. The charisma of the
saleslady was the magic ingredient.

3. Pampalubag-loob (Abreaction). Filipinos are very fond of bargaining

(tawad or dagdag) at the stores. These are invitations to the
customers to come back and are privileges given to regular customers.
(Cariño)
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4. Salitang pag-iwas (Evasion Suppression). We hide the truth from

friends when we have no money. Instead we create a lot of reasons
for not joining them at lunch. “I will not join you for lunch because I
ate my lunch at home before I Left for school.” The truth is one has no
money. This is her way of avoiding embarrassment.

5. Gaya-Gaya, Hawa-hawa ( Introjection-Projection). “Pare-pareho na

lang tayo” expresses one Filipino value. One group of students was
interviewed about why they ordered the same kind of menu. They
said that there was a long queue and that it would take time if they
had different orders. Besides it was better if they had the same order
so that they would eat the same food. “All for one, one for all.”

6. Utang na loob (Compensation). Because somebody has done

something good to somebody, he will reach out to reciprocate as soon
as he can. A friend one day bought merienda for himself and for a
friend. The nesxt day, the other friend returned the favor. This is
utang na loob.

7. Bayanihan (Sublimation). Bayanihan is predominantly found in rural

places where people are ready to extend helping hands to those in
need. During harvest season in the rural areas, workers are not paid
in terms of money. They use the bayanihan system. When a family
transfers to a new neighborhood, the new neighbors provide help for
free. This is a beautiful Filipino value which must be preserved and
handed down through generations.

8. Pamamagitan (Tranferences). In every argument, somebody has to

act as the mediator (tagapamagitan). This third party is important.
By nature, Filipinos are emotional and hot-tempered. A catalyzer is
needed to calm down both parties and prevent any further
complications in the argument. As in boxing, there is always a referee
who acts as an intermediary to prevent further argument.

9. Fiesta Grande (Sublimation/Fixation). This kind of culture was

handed down to us by the Spaniards. For example, we have the
inclination to serve lavish foods during fiestas in spite of meager
income. Sometimes we tend to resort to borrowing with high interest
just to be able to create the impression that the family can afford to
serve delicious food during fiestas.

10. Hiya (Fixation/Self-blame). Some freshmen college students are

embarrassed to ask their teachers, administrators, or their classmates
what they want. They would rather stay mum because of hiya.
Shyness is one of the serious problems of our college students. Their
learning is hampered because being shy inhibits them from speaking
up. Their ability to communicate and share their ideas and express
their creativity are all put to waste. However, among the present
generation, especially those born in the cities and Metro Manila, this
trait of shyness is gradually disappearing.
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11. Kapangyarihan (Fixation/Sublimation). Moneyed people can easily

have power and authority. The underdogs submit to the power that
be. People with power tend to dominate others and abuse their
authority by taking advantage of the weaknesses of others. Nowadays,
there are many of us who have split personalities. Some people have
principles only in theory. When they are faced with situations
favorable to them, they forget their principles.

12. Patriotism (Sipsip). Boot-licking is practiced by many Filipinos. It is

common to give gifts during fiestas, birthdays, and special occasions to
gain some blessings from the powers-that-be. Promotions, increase in
salaries, recommendations for merit, scholarships, better
accommodations, and privileges are some of these blessings.

People enjoying high administrative positions have many rewards.

They are surrounded with people who praise them lavishly, are
loyal to them, wait for their command, emulate them, and give
them consideration and sympathy. Such people form what called a
cordon sanitaire. It is their responsibility to maintain the respect
of the people for their masters and to maintain esteem.

13. Pagsasabukas (Evasion/Rationalization). Avoid the habit of

procrastination. Time is gold. Time spent will never come back. Do
today what you can do because tomorrow might be too late.

14. Ningas-Cogon (Energy Deflation). Enthusiasm is high at the early

stage of the work. It accelerates and after it has reached the climax
when there is no more excitement and challenge in the job, the
interest in the job dies down.

15. Siya Kasi (Scapegoat, rationalization, blame). This usually happens in

a disastrous situation. One is always looking for someone to put the
blame on. “Siya naman talaga ang may gusto niyan, tumulong lang
ako.”

16. Bahala na. (Come what may). When situations become problematic
and one cannot seem to analyze the facts and find solutions to the
problems, one usually says “Bahala na.”

17. Amor propio (Egoism). “I only go to classy restaurants,” states a social

climber who wants to have an elitist status, though this feeling of
grandeur is only the product of his imagination.

? Questions

1. What is the importance of Filipino values in the work and industry?

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PSYCHOLOGICAL ATTRIBUTES OF PERSONALITY

TOPIC 5

We are human beings with complicated lives. Stresses, conflicts,

frustrations, intrigues, irritations, disappointments, unusual tasks, and family
moods are only some of the great challenges that confront us in our everyday life.

It takes a lifetime process to develop the leniable attributes of personality,

but they make one very competent in life. These are personal discipline, self
awareness, self esteem, attitude awareness, creative thinking, innate love for
people, and self confidence.

They provide the strong foundation of personality which enables one to

cope with any problem in life.

1. Personal discipline

The crowded hours come to us one at a time. This is the only way
they can come. The day may bring in many, many tasks, many problems but they
can come only in single file.

Getting more with less time

One can overcome that stressed feeling and make more time for oneself
by following simple tips from a time management consultant.

a. Do first the chores that you feel are most important. If you do so, the rest
of your work will seem easy.

b. Schedule tasks by jotting them down on “post it” notepads, then stick each
note on a calendar.

c. When you need to adjust your schedule, move the notes around on the
calendar to fit in with your own time needs. This will give you the feeling
of being in control of your schedule.

d. Get outside the house at least twice a day. Staying in all day builds up
pressure and can make one more frantic than necessary.

e. Don’t over prepare, if you have give a report at a business meeting, don’t
waste time over rehearsing. It only increases stress.

f. Minimize distractions; put away unnecessary things so that your space is

cleared.

g. Create a simple time-saving system around your home.

h. Get to work or to an appointment five minutes early. This will keep you
from feeling frantic.(worried)
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2. Self Awareness - this is defined as the “degree of clarity with which

we perceive and understand, both consciously and unconsciously, all the factors
that affect our lives.

Knowing the understanding oneself is the first important step to one’s

growth and development as a person. It is an endless exploration which may go
on and on through out one’s life.

“Know thyself”, said Socrates. Once one comes face to face with himself,
one can do something about his limitations.

No two persons are the same in abilities, interests, potential, outlook,

needs, values, strength and limitations. Self discovery is the beginning step
toward growth and change. The change and growth should signal the directions
where one is going.

Being able to look at oneself realistically is the beginning step in self

awareness and it is basic to self understanding as well as our understanding of
others.

Responsible feedback is given and received from very close and trusted
friends and give to us out of genuine concern. Feedback can either be positive or
negative or neutral. Positive feedback is given less frequently while negative
feedback is difficult to give and to receive. However, both can be very useful and
constructive if one has an open mind and a positive attitude to make them work
to one’s advantage.

If one knows he is accepted, he feels, safe. He can throw away his defenses
and his masks, remove his façade and relax, and be just his true self.

3. Self Esteem - is absolutely essential to personal happiness and

rich life. It is a sense of adequacy and personal self worth. It indicates how one
actually feels about himself.

Becoming an officer of an organization, topping the class and being a

dependable and responsible member of the family enhance one’s self esteem.

4. Attitude Awareness - Attitudes can give new dimensions to one’s

thinking.

A healthy mind is the outcome of positive attitudes. Negative attitudes are

“resistors” which hold us back, retard effectiveness and cause others to respond
negatively towards us. Positive attitude accelerate fulfillment in one’ life.

Ways to Achieve a Positive Outlook

There are a number of ways by which a positive outlook in life may be achieved.

1. Remember the truth that life is tough.

2. Learn to accept your human assets as well as your human liabilities.

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3. Learn to recognize self hate both inside and outside yourself.

4. Make maximum use of compassion in accepting all aspects of yourself so

that you can attain happiness.

5. Remember that happiness is everyday living. “Feeling good” is what

happiness is all about.

6. Believe in yourself. Stop thoughts that are self doubting and belittling,
Recall past successes.

7. Trust yourself. Listen to your intuition and follow your hunches.

(feelings)

8. Schedule “fun” time and “alone” time.

9. Make a list of things you like and those you don’t like.

10. Meditate, exercise, and pray often.

5. Creative Thinking - Ninety percent (90%) of our original ideas die

upon conception. Ten percent (10%) become somewhat developed. Half of the
10% see the light of the day. This is because we find it difficult to believe that we
can have what we want in life.

The only reality is that we believe in what we will become.

6. Innate love for people - the factors that lower efficiency in a company
are discouragement, demoralization, monotony, dissatisfaction, irritations,
detractions, and unappreciated efforts.

One can help others grow by giving praise and encouragement, being
tolerant, listening to them, understanding them, sharing with them, helping them
dream, dismissing their blunders and mistakes, giving them your sincere love.
Trust and respect are two prime ingredients in any invitation to grow.

7. Self Confidence - Confidence in one’s work can be achieved by doing

the following:

1. Dare try to succeed - Erase shyness by deciding that you can

succeed. One will commit errors at the beginning but there is training anyway.

2. Transform self consciousness to self confidence - Concentrate on

the other person rather than worry about what others think of you. Shifting of
attention from oneself to the other will precipitate self confidence.

3. Strive toward mental relaxation. Once can accomplish more when one is
relaxed. More space is needed between periods of grueling work and pressures.

4. Respond to the needs of others. Self confidence calls for bing responsible,
showing interest in others and feeling at home with them. Sensitivity to the
needs and feelings of others are signs of humaneness.
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5. Have a confidence in your values. Self respect, self worth, and self liking go
along way in building self confidence. Like yourself and consider yourself of
value to toher people.

6. Learn to listen. A conversationalist knows how to listen. When someone is

talking, the other person is usually thinking what to say next instead of listening.
The other person is not heard at all. Hence, there is no exchange of ideas.

7. Be a doer instead of a sitter. Participate actively rather than just sitting back
and waiting for something to come to you.

8. Be quick to compliment and be slow to criticize. Give well deserved

compliments.

Ways of Improving Personality

1. Treat other people as very important persons. Treating them well is a

kind of investment in human resources.

2. Continuously grow, change and develop. Twenty minutes of reading a

day contributes immensely to self improvement.

3. Be time conscious. Meet your engagements. Failure in meeting

appointments might result in loss of friendship.

4. Have self confidence. This is the strongest source of security one can have
as his inner protection against intrigues, detractions, challenges, and
complicated situations in life.

? Questions

1. How is personal discipline essential in terms of time management,

personal habits , and decisions making?

2. How can a positive outlook bring about a bright future for an individual?

STRESS
TOPIC 6
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Everyone of us experiences stress because it is a normal part of life. Some

stress is necessary for an individual to function normally. Stress may be pleasant
or unpleasant. The term is commonly used to describe a feeling or emotion
although actually it is not an emotion.

Stress is defined as the process by which the individual responds to

environmental and psychological events that are perceived as threatening or
challenging.

Some producers of stress such physical exercise, various emotional states

and creative activity are usually considered healthy. If the situation or
experience is a positive one for you, you do not generally think of it as stress. It is
the prolonged and unwanted stress that can have undesirable effects on the
individual’s mental and physical health and therefore are considered unhealthy.

Ways in which stress can occur

A person in a physically or mentally demanding or dangerous situation is

said to under stress. Internal disorders for example, can produce stress
responses. Chronic repetition of certain emotions, such as anger or despair,
changes in work or home situations or a reaction to surgery are some of the
ways in which stress can occur.

If the level of stress is particularly high and if it becomes too

uncomfortable, there is a need to reduce the stressor because in such a condition
the person’s personality is adversely affected.

The young needs to know that stress can make people physically sick.
Anyone who has had to prepare for a big examination knows that stress can lead
to a loss of appetite, insomnia or the inability to sleep, and tension headaches.

Stress response

When a person is subjected to stressors, the strength and duration of the

stress response that follows depend on the physical and mental condition of the
individual. The response is the same each time.

The stress response can be described as a chain reaction of changes

within the body such as quicker breathing, greater production of adrenalin,
faster heartbeat, rise in blood supply to hands and feet, increase in body
metabolism, faster clotting of blood, reduction of blood supply to stomach and
abdomen, increase of blood flow to the muscles, sharpening of all senses, and
tension in the bowels and stomach functions.

Positive Effects of stress

1. It develops one’s mettle

2. Increase alertness

3. Improves sight
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4. Strengthens muscles

5. Reduces reaction time

6. Increases our ability to stand and fight, to turn and flee(escape)

7. To mobilize all our resources to achieve whatever we decide to do.

Many people need challenges in their lives and would be unhappy without them.
Stress has a positive effect if it can be worked off.

Negative effects of stress

1. Decline in work performance like inability to meet deadlines or

submitting poor quality work and work performance gaps.

2. Gets easily irritated and anxious over things no matter how trivial they
may be.

3. Common cause for almost diseases whether it be a heart attack, a mild

case of asthma, or just the feeling of being sick which is chemical
imbalance.

Some negative effects of stress are stated under three category:

Unsuitable behavior Lower energy and Poorer health

performance level

Loser behavior Reduced concentration Heart and circulatory

diseases

Short temper Increased forgetfulness Ulcers

Bad smoking, eating Poor judgment Infectious disease

And drinking habits

More frequent mistakes

Prone to feelings of Skin diseases
tiredness

Less flexibility

Stressors
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Stressors are the events that cause stress. It is important that we learn to
control stress and live with it. The first step in learning to control stress is to find
out what your stressors are, that is, what stresses you personally.

Stressors can be divided into physical, social, and psychological.

1. Physical Stressors - the following are examples of physical

stressors.

Heat, cold, noise, fire, traffic, violence, own illness, poor working
conditions and equipment.

2. Social Stressors - there are four main causes of social stress

are:

a. Economic and political stressors - unemployment, cost of

housing and crime.

b. Family - sharing of workload, jealousy or sibling rivalry, sex

roles, different values, death or illness in the family, different lifestyle,
and money problems.

c. Job and career - deadlines, muddled(confused) communications,

travelling time, interruptions, competitions, power struggles.

d. Interpersonal and environmental - different values,

obligations, waiting time, poor service, smokers-non smokers, driving
habits, social expectations.

3. Psychological stressors -

Frustration - occurs when one’s strivings are thwarted by obstacles that

block progress toward a desired goal.

Conflicts - are also psychological stressors. A conflict is the

simultaneous occurrence or two or more important but incompatible needs or
motives.

Pressures - it forces a person to change the direction of a goal oriented

behavior.

Stress signals

Just as it is helpful to know our stressors, it is also good to learn to

recognize the signals in us which tell us that we are overstressed. These signals
can be mental, physical, emotional, or behavioral.

A stress signal acts as a red light or warning bell to tell us that action is
needed to prevent more serious problems from developing. The trouble is that
we do not always recognize the warning signs right away and even if we do see
them, we do not always act quickly enough.
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The following are examples of stress signals:

1. Physical

Change in breathing rhythm, tense and aching muscles, headaches,

sweating, cold hands and feet, changes in appetite, and stomach problems,
heartburn.

2. Mental

Lack of concentration, more frequent mistakes, forgetfulness, absent

mindedness, tendency to over react, poorer judgment.

3. Emotional

Irritation, short temper, nervousness, depression, silence, emotional ,

crying.

4. Behavioral

Insomnia, increased drinking, smoking, eating, absenteeism, clumsiness.

How to cope with stress

1. Cognitive Responses

Cognitive coping involves reappraisal, raising self esteem, and developing

self efficacy. In a disappointing and stressful situation, the amount of stress
experienced is as much a function of the way we interpret the event as it is due to
the event itself.

Stress could be reduced by reexamining the situation and identifying its

positive aspects. Reappraisal does not involve denying the situation or the
disappointment; it does involve looking at the good as well as bad.

2. Informational Responses

Uncertainty caused by lack of information contributes to the stress of the

situation. A study found that cancer patients who believed their contribution was
incurable delayed treatment tow and half times longer than people with the
same disease who believed it was curable.

3. Behavioral Responses

The following are suggested.

1. Sleep well, eat well, avoid harm, and exercise regularly.

2. Develop and maintain a relaxation program.

3. Do thing you enjoy. Develop hobbies.

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4. Be part of a social network and know that you can rely on others to
help in time of crisis. Social support plays a major role in coping with
stress.

5. Learn to set aside problems temporarily.

6. Have a clear picture of your life goals.

6.1 Check your priorities; update your value system.

6.2 Develop trust in God.

7. Nurture your faith dimension.

7.1 Have regular meditation and prayer.

7.2 Seek God’s will and yield to it.

8. Take a break or a vacation.

? Questions

1. Describe how you felt when you experienced a stressful situation?

2. How did you handle the stressful situation?

3. How did the stressful situation affect you? Positively, negatively?

MOTIVATION
TOPIC 7
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Every human experience involves a causative factor that produces a kind

of response. Motivation is often considered as an answer to the questions of why
an action is performed.

In explaining, the behavior of people, we start our description with

reference to some kind of active driving force; the individual seeks, the
individual wants, the individual fears.

Terms synonymous with motive are needs, drive, urges, desires, goals,
aspirations and purposes. Man’s wants, desires, drives, and urges are the
explanation of a person’s behavior.

A need is “a general state of deficiency or lack (eg food) or state of

deprivation within an organism.

Drives are the state of uncomfortable tension that spur activity until a
goal or incentive is reached.

Wants and urges are instinctive. They are primitive unless modified by
will power, determination and self control, training and experiences. They may
be transformed into desirable behaviors. The sex urge can become an
expression of love and affection with someone dear to you.

Classification of Motives

Motives can be classified into two:

1. Physiological motives - which are sometimes called survival

motives are those directly related to normal body functions such as the
need for food, water, air, rest, excretion, exercise, peace.
2. Psychological motives - are sometimes called psychosocial
needs, are those that arise from interaction with other people such as the
need for affection, belongingness, achievements, social recognition, self
actualization, self esteem and acceptance.

 the physiological has something to do with the normal functioning of

the body system while psychological is concerned with the psychic or
mental and emotional functioning of the individual.

 Physiological needs may easily be satisfied, while psychological needs

may be unsatisfiable.

 A person cannot think of the welfare and love for others if his basic
needs are not met.

 The proper and normal functioning of the body systems should be

attended to before a person is able to understand, to learn, to
appreciate, and adapt to new situations.
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 The value of play, curiosity, enthusiasm, gregariousness, sympathy,

and cultural arts are nothing when stomach is empty and when one is
troubled as to where to get the nest day’s meal for his family and
where to gather his family members for the night.

Motivation and Incentives

 Motivations are both internal and external.

External incentives - may come in the forms of prizes, money, promotion,

medals, plaques, diplomas, certificates and citations.

 When incentives are present, the individual is stimulated and

motivated. In a classroom, learning is rather slow when motivations
are not accompanied by incentives.

 In the course of time, when the individual discovers the joy in reading,
he develops an increasing desire for knowledge. Thus he widens his
vocabulary and increases his self confidence.

Factors which may influence motivation

 Complicated individuals that we are, our desires, and goals in life are
multi directed, depending on one’s priorities. These considerations are
influence greatly by certain factors given below:

1. Interest - a person will always give vent to whatever his

interest in life. A doctor who sacrifice a great deal of his pleasures in life
while studying for the medical course cannot attain success in his
profession if he is more inclined toward politics.

2. Power and authority - some people are born to have a strong

desire to be on top of other people. Having high intelligence, great self
confidence, and belief in one’s capacity are the elements that drive people
to seek power and authority.

 For some people, power and authority become their projections in life.
If they miss some aspects of life, power and authority become their
substitutes for success.

3. Personal growth - life is a continuous process of becoming, of

growing and developing. Motivation is the driving force which gives
“buoyancy”
(optimism) in going through the stage by stage struggle in attaining our
objectives in life.
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 Life is stagnant without struggle and there is no struggle without

motivation. When motivation is lost, life becomes a vacuum. (empty,
nothingness)

4. Self fulfillment - this is the stage when the goals in life are
attained. This can only take place at a normal place at 45 years and above.
This is the period when one has a family, a career, and many materials
possessions.
 One may have achieved status, power, authority, and success. All of
these become possible when motivations, external and internal
become widely used positively by the individual.

Motivation of Behavior

 a useful and distinctive way of viewing motives has been suggested by

Abraham Maslow. He views human motives as arranged in an
ascending hierarchy of steps extending from the basic biological needs
to the most complex social and personal desires.

 as the needs in the lower level in the hierarchy are fulfilled, the needs
at higher level become strong and active and motivate the person.

 For example, a starving person experiences a very strong need for

food, but may feel little need to be admired by others. After food has
been made constantly available and normal life has been resumed, this
same person may then find that the need to be admired has become a
predominant one.

Abraham Maslow proposes the hierarchy of needs.

1. The physiological needs, which are need for food, water and air and so
on.
2. The safety needs, which are those needs that are manifested in people’s
efforts to maintain a sociable, predictable, orderly and non threatening
environment.
3. Love and belongingness or the need to develop relationships involving
reciprocal affection; the need to become a member of a group.
4. Self Esteem cultivating and maintaining this need will be attended to only
after the lower level ends are satisfied. While people need food, they are
not likely to be concerned with love or with self esteem.
5. The highest need in Maslow’s system is our tendency towards self
actualization.

Self Actualization

 Maslow made some interesting observations on an experiment he

carried out with healthy non neurotic prominent people whom he had
identified as being self actualized. Here are some of his behaviors.
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1. They have a more efficient perception of reality and a more comfortable

relation with it.

2. They can be described as relatively spontaneous in behavior. Their

behavior is marked by simplicity and naturalness and by lack of
artificiality or striving for effect.

3. They are problem centered rather than ego centered.

4. They positively enjoy solitude and privacy to a greater degree than the
average person. They find it easy to be aloof, reserved and calm.

5. They are propelled by growth motivation rather than by deficiency

motivation.

6. They have deeper and profound interpersonal relations than any other
adults and are capable of greater love.

7. They are more democratic.

8. They show a special kind of creativeness or originality. They are specially

endowed with a drive and capacity to do the unusual.

 If employees are not properly motivated, their work objectives suffer

and are not realized. They will have personal conflicts with
supervisors; in the outputs will be restricted; and there will be high
wastage of materials and time, high absenteeism, and unofficial
stoppages of work.

? Questions
1. What are some factors which influence motivation?
2. What is mean by incentive?
3. Explain Maslow’s hierarchy of needs
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EMOTIONS AND MENTAL HEALTH

TOPIC 8

Two authors said that emotional well being is a primary factor in a child’s
mental and personality development. A child inherits not only physical structure
but also the psychological structures of emotional and mental potentiality called
psychological constitution.

This world is a complex place to live. Changes may be in terms of

technology, population explosion, politics, educational growth, or moral values.
As there is the constant need for the coping skill; it is in this regard that the
psychological constitution of a man is put to the test.

Emotion - Abraham Sperling (1976) defines an emotion as a state of

agitation, distribution of equilibrium (balance), an intense, random and
disorganized response to a stimulus.

A person without emotional stress is calm and serene. Emotional stimulus

and instigation are but normal occurrences in this excitable world. It is only
when one’s feelings and emotions are excessive that emotions become
detrimental.

Negative and positive emotions must be in moderation if they are to

influence and pervade our behavior, health and personality.

John B Watson - claimed that fear, rage(anger) and love are the three
basic emotions around which complex adult emotions were evolved.

Basically, emotions are instincts. The instincts to live and to survive lead
the new born baby to grope for his food from the mother’s breast event if no one
teaches him.

He will suck anything put into his mouth in order to live. From his crib, he
will show contentment when physiologically satisfied; anger overwhelms him
when his needs and wants are not met.

In a young child, jealousy may take the form of bed wetting, pretense of
illness, refusal to eat, sucking of the thumb, or ignoring others.

Adolescence is the stage when he experiences the first taste of love.

Sometimes it is devastating to someone when love becomes an experience of
bitterness.

The importance of play to children cannot be underestimated. They are

the vehicle for releasing tensions. When a child plays, he is given the opportunity
to release fear, resentment, and frustrations resulting from parental prohibitions
and control.

Are facial expressions accurate indicators of emotions?

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Although there are facial expressions for each kind of emotion, they are
not however dependable indicators of emotions. Some people are so happy that
tears flow from their eyes, while some people in spite of internal grief during the
burial of love one, cannot cry.

Emotions and Feelings Differentiated

Feelings and emotions are moving powers of human beings. Anxieties,

enthusiasm, apprehension(worry), desires, and the pleasantness and
unpleasantness of life experiences elicit the powers of emotion.

Positive emotions - result in the effectiveness and efficiency of

individuals.

Negative emotions - result in the ineffectiveness and inefficiency of

individuals.

Can you imagine what this world would be like if people did not have
emotions?

If people had uniform reactions, this world would be dull, and without
challenge and variety at all.

Emotions are stronger than feelings. While feelings concern the external
sensations of pain and pleasure through external senses of the body, emotions
are strong and intense, integrated and focused on the object of emotions. They
are so internalized that they integrate body and mind.

Feelings are the simple pleasurable or painful aspects of mental processes

or bodily conditions.

Classifications of Emotions

There is a wide spectrum of emotions:

1. Personal emotions - are based on self, such as self assertion, self

preservation, self control, self assurance, self adequacy, self sufficiency
and self esteem.

2. Social emotions - are the strong feeling people have because

they are part of the society they move in. Sympathy is the most
fundamental of them all. Empathy is the desire to share with others the
sensitivity an individual feels toward others. Love for the family,
patriotism, philanthropy, competition, rivalry, pride, brotherhood, and
the desire to lead others are some of the social emotions people have as
grown up individuals.
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3. Intellectual emotions - are based on love for the truth. People

possess intellectual emotions when they develop guiding principles and
philosophies, systems of values and high moral standards. Novelty
(originality) and loftiness (arrogance) of ideals are good examples.

4. The aesthetic emotions - are wholly influenced by the cultural

background. The finer taste as an outcome of one’s exposure to
refinements and one’s finesse depends on his lifetime experiences,
education and training.

How Powerful is emotion?

Emotion can propel man into action. It is a strong power which drives
man to carry heavy objects in times of fire and in times of war, in times of
calamities and in times of emergencies.

Emotions provide inspiration to do and accomplish things which could

hardly be attained under normal situations. Most often man finds himself doing
something not through the dictates of his mind but through the impulse of his
emotions. The body system follows the emotions blindly and unconsciously
when emotions overpower someone.

A person should know how to manage his emotions. He should know how
to properly direct and tailor his emotions toward his goals. Emotions may be
compared to water which given the right canals will not overflow and will not
devastate humanity.

Control of emotions

Self control is the difference between men and had brute creation. Man is
capable of controlling emotions since he is endowed with the intellect and the
will.

Self control - is the ability to regulate oneself in every situation. It is the

ability to do an act with a balanced mind.

There are certain practices that need to be followed in order to have poise
and self control.

1. Refrain from gambling and other vices.

2. Avoid unwholesome habits such as drinking liquor, smoking, overeating,
etc.
3. Control your temper and language.
4. Take criticisms calmly and good naturedly.
5. Cultivate the habit of denying yourself some of the luxuries of life.
6. Shun all forms of vice, and endeavor to help in checking and eliminating
them.
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How to live with oneself

The whole drama of life springs out of our basic “I want”.

1. I want to live. “How long?” “Forever” - a person will normally

preserve himself. It is the most basic instinct and tendency. If it is a
question or saving one out of two, between himself and a friend, between
himself and a brother, himself and a mother, still it is himself who will
win.

2. I want a feeling of importance - The ego of the person is

flattered when it is being fed with importance, recognition, and a feeling
of being useful and needed. This is the most sensitive part of the
individual. One will always go along way if his ego is bolstered and
elevated.

3. I want a mate - An old maid who claims that she is truly happy is
telling a lie. A woman is born to a man and a man to a woman. Persons of
opposite sex always attract each other. It is most fulfilling to have a mate
when both minds meet and when the man stands as the father, husband,
playmate, and co worker at the appropriate time.

4. I want a little variety/change - Life is boring without variety of

change. A monotonous life skills motivations, initiative, interests, goals
and ambitions. It is very difficult to drag the years through monotonous
events. Challenges, problems, innovations and rich provoking situations
can provide variety and color in one’s life.

Major signs of Mental Health

1. Maintaining self confidence- is trusting oneself to cope with the

difficulties which cross one’s way.

2. Making adjustments - is making oneself able to fit in almost all

situations confronting him. Tension is always present at every beginning
stage. Later when one becomes conditioned to the new situation, tensions
gradually disappear and acceptance creeps in until one begins to feel
comfortable in that situation.

3. Controlling emotions - emotional blocks have a detrimental

effect on the individual. A person is kept from using his logical thinking
when he is enveloped with emotions. He is likely to be caught off guard
and, with all probability, he cannot respond appropriately since he is
shrouded with emotions.

4. Positive self concept - a high regard for oneself should be

encouraged and maintained. One can maintain a certain degree of
respectability if he first respects himself. In view of this positive self
concept, one will be less tempted to do wrong, lest his values be trampled.
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Five steps to happiness

1. Laughter - “Give yourself an emotional and physical lift by

including laughter and play in your life on a regular basis.

2. Confidence - one way to happiness is to talk to yourself

lovingly in
front of a mirror, to act lovingly towards yourself in the presence of
others, and to be proud of yourself in public.

Low self esteem - is a barrier to the development of our prosperity

because it
keeps us from developing our full potential.

3. Tasting risks - every successful person agrees that there is risk in

the pursuit of achievement. We get energy for taking risks when we face
our fear and act in spite of it. Fear of failure keeps us from risking but
willingness to risk is a measure of our consciousness or prosperity.

4. Creative boost - The following are seed of creativity.

a. Productivity - most productive people are creative. In the process

of working and being productive, one has the opportunity to become
creative.
b. Analytical thinking - unconsciously, this breaks down concepts
and ideas into their component part s. To understand something
thoroughly, one has to see beyond its surface structure.
c. Independent thinking - be an independent thinker.
Information is collected, analyzed, and stored in order that one can
render an independent judgment.
d. Unconventionality - what make unconventional people different
from others are their ideas and not the clothes that they wear.

5. What can one do when he wants to change but doesn’t know how”;

a. Dare to love yourself in a world that gives no guarantee.

b. Pay attention to what you feel.
c. Nobody can really tell you the answer to life’s problems.
d. If what you are doing is not getting you what you want, try something
different.
e. When you are considering a specific change, make a list of all possible
things that could happen.
f. Before you change, take a few moments to compliment yourself for some
specific attributes.
g. If you decide to have a change, do it. Insight and understanding change
nothing—action does it.
h. After you try a change, evaluate the results.
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Ways to take yourself out of the blues and black moods

1. Learn about yourself. Chart your moods. What are the kinds
of irritations which provoke your temper? What are your
idiosyncrasies(habit)? Each of one has his own.

2. Self pity is the worst enemy. This will show the pace of growth and
progress because one tends to be myopic when he indulges in self pity.

3. Exercise. This will help in the circulation of the blood. It strengthens

the heart and extremities and it prolongs life.

4. Be conscious if your morale is becoming low. Count your blessings as

kind of antidote(cure/answer). What re the causes of demoralization?

5. Be realistic about yourself. Balance your goals and ambitions with facts
about you. There should be a happy medium between the two so that
realization is possible.

6. Do something you enjoy. There are many hobbies and recreational

activities one can resort to when feeling blue.

7. Don’t panic. Time is a great healer. It will allow situational problems to

settle by themselves. To panic will cause more harm than good.

8. Involve yourself with life. No matter who gets hurt, no matter how serious
the problem is, this world should continue to go around.

Frustration - is experienced by an individual when his action meets some

form of interference which prevents or delays its completion.

Factors of Frustration

1. Physical factors
a. Poor health
b. Physical defects such as obesity, shortness in height or
excessive height, being ugly, and speech defects.

2. Intellectual factors
a. Lack of ability to achieve a certain goal
b. Possession of abilities way beyond the requirements of a task.

3. Socio economic factors

a. “Keeping up with the Jonesses”
b. Financial constraint in attaining one’s ambition like taking up
medicine.
 2

c. Social discrimination due to financial difficulty in falling with a

social group.

4. Interruption and disturbances

a. Frustration due to minor disturbances like noise while reading
newspapers.
b. Changes in one’s usual way of life.

5. Cultural origins.

The symptoms of failing adjustments

1. Physical symptoms
1. Lack of muscular control like shaking of hands, tremors(tremble).
2. General feelings of weakness, fatigue without apparent reasons,
stammering, speck block, frequent urination.
3. Hypochondriasis - playing sick to avoid disagreeable situations.

2. Emotional symptoms
1. Insomnia - can’t muster(meet) sleep, restlessness.
2. Depression- constant worry, blue moods, indifferent attitude.
3. Hyper activity – always doing something without finishing.
4. Sensitivity - can’t accept criticism
5. Sadism - likes to see others suffer; hostile, morose.
6. Self persecution - bitterness toward the world hates other
people, and gets frustrated about everything one does.
7. Fluctuation in moods, excessive fears, and obsessions.

3. Social symptoms
1. Distrusts people
2. Happy when alone
3. Feels he is always right
4. Does not speak to people unless they speak first

4. Behavioral symptoms
1. Unable to make decisions
2. Over eating
3. Unchanged dogmatic ideas

? Questions

1. Study the lyrics of Mariah Carey’s song “Emotions” then explain what
the meaning of the song is.
2. How should frustration be handled?
3. When can one say that he is happily adjusted to life?
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THE MORAL AND SPIRITUAL ASPECTS OF PERSONALITY

TOPIC 9

Every person feels good when he sense that he is being trusted, given
responsibility to do certain things equal to and in line with his abilities, and held
accountable for his actions.

All these make him feel that he has the authority to decide and act
according to the dictates of his conscience and reason.

Social Institutions influencing moral behavior

1. Family- the family is the major factor in the moral development of

an individual. Educators and social scientists are one in their view that the
family is the first socializing agent that molds the child in his earliest
years so that he may become an accepted member of the group.

Through the family the child sees a standard picture of behavior

appropriate for varying occasions. The emotions of love, hate, joy and
anger and the ideas of right and wrong are conveyed to him by the acts of
his parents, his siblings, and other older members of the family.

2. The Peer Group - People react strongly to social approval or

social acceptance. We all wish to be accepted, especially by our peers.
Hence, we dress and act like them. We always want to be “in”.

3. The School - One of the most important aims of education in the

Philippines is to develop moral character and personal discipline.
Teachers are expected to impart moral and spiritual values. Moral
training is incorporated in the curriculum, specially in the elementary
grades and high school. The prevalent disrespect for authority was one of
the reasons for emphasis on moral education.

4. The Church - In the last three decades, there have been many
organized Christian movements. There are agents for the propagation of a
moral code. The church is also one of the agents of social control.

Moral Behavior

There are four approaches in the development of moral behavior namely:

1. Psychoanalytic approach - expresses the idea that when the

superego dominates the individual, he or she is good because he or she
has a conscience that tells him or her to be good.

2. Learning theory approach - says that we have been trained and

disciplined by our upbringing and by the examples of our parents into
behaving the way we should.
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3. Social group approach - claims that we behave the way we do because

people expects us to behave that way.

4. Cognitive developmental approach - asserts that to behave

morally implies intelligent adaptations to our environment.

The Code of Ethics by President Manuel L Quezon (EO No 217,1939, is very

good
guide for all of us. Putting them into practice would ensure a peaceful and better
place to live in. Some of the teachings are:

1. Value your honor as you value your life. Poverty with honor is preferable
to wealth with dishonor.
2. Be truthful and be honest in thought and in action. Be just and charitable,
courteous but dignified in your dealings with others.
3. Lead a clean and frugal life. Do not indulge in frivolity or pretense.
4. Love and respect your parents. It is your duty to serve t hem gratefully
and well.
5. Rely on your own efforts for your progress and happiness.
6. Safeguard the purity of suffrage and abide by the decisions of the
majority.
7. Do not leave for tomorrow what you can do today. Work badly done is
worse than work undone.

In our interactions with each other we ought to learn to live together in peace
and
harmony, whether at home, in school, in the community or elsewhere.

1. Never think that your opinion is always right.

2. Listen also to the voices of other people.
3. Never expect or depend on getting something in return for every favor
you give.
4. Respect the dignity and rights of the individual .
5. Do good without thought of material reward.
6. Appreciate God’s gifts and use them in a worthy manner.
7. Never have sex if you don’t know your responsibility.
8. One of the laws of our land states that we should not enrich ourselves at
the expense of others.

Morality

 is primarily concerned with the rightness and wrongness of an act.

 An act is said to be immoral if the doer has an intentional motive to
kill, or destroy somebody.

The following are some points of Christian Morality.

1. Christians are dailyl bombarded with unchristian views of man. This can
effect us and make us act towards others in unchristian ways.
2

2. Based on the natural law and divine revelation, Christianity maintains

that each person is fundamentally good, redeemable, and loved by God. It
holds that each man and woman, whether he or she knows it, is
potentially a child of God, and a brother or sister of Jesus Christ and of
each other.

3. Man is a free creature who is responsible for his freedom. He is able to

respond with love to the demands his brothers and sisters place on him.

4. The subjective norm of morality is one’s conscience. A person has to

follow his or her conscience, but he or she has the duty to develop a
properly formed conscience.

Moral virtues are considered as the following:

1. Self Control which regulates our appetites for sex and food.
2. Fortitude which regulates our emotions, principally of anger.
3. Justice to all which inclines man to render to each one his due.
4. Prudence or tact which judiciously guides and controls human action.
Thus, bearing in mind what man actually is, which is that he is endowed
with the intellect and the will.

? Questions

1. Which of the four major social institutions do you think is the most
influential in terms of developing the character of man. Why?
2. State one teaching under the Quezon Code of Ethics and explain it.
3. What can be our guide in order to be morally good?
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HUMAN RELATIONS
TOPIC 10

Human Relations - is the art of knowing people, relating with them, and
maintaining and keeping their friendship.

Human relations is differentiated from public relations in the sense that

public relations means dealing with people, while human relations deals with
individuals as individuals and as members of group; it deals more closely with
each individual.

Developing effectiveness in human relations requires understanding of

human behavior. No two individuals are exactly alike. Not even identical twins
are alike. Each one is a unique person; thus it needs a special knack and skills to
understand and handle each person’s behavior.

Contacts with other people are momentous. Proper courtesies may lead to
friendship while impoliteness creates havoc(disorder).

Human relations influences

1. Family - the family is the smallest unit of society. It is the

microcosm which is enlarged into a national community or government.
The parents are the managers and the children are the employees as in a
company. Each member play his role for the smooth functioning of the
family system.

2. Friends - Good friends are our treasures and investment. We

invest in friendships when we offer and render them our thoughtfulness,
ideas, love, care and concern. Friends tend to reciprocate the good things
done to them. This process makes friendship among people lasting.

3. Community - the community is the place where spend the rest of

our waking hours outside the place of work. Involvement in the affairs in
of the community elicit cooperation and willingness to participate in
community projects. Good attitude and enthusiasm are contagious and
can contaminate people in the community.

4. Business and industry - Management deals directly with

business resources such as personnel, materials, machines, money
facilities, and equipments, thus keeping them in indefinite relations to one
another. Manpower resources are the most complex and the most
challenging but the best of all resources.

Seven Ways to become interesting

1. Volunteer your time to a worthy organization.

2. Try and activity one does not ordinarily do. Walk barefoot in the rain,
explore the nature of Verde Island and others.
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3. Pamper a pet. People find animals fascinating.

4. Try new foods. The exotic taste of new foods satisfies curiosity.
5. Read magazines. Your conversations will become more invigorating when
you inject fascinating things you’ve been reading about.
6. Smile and Laugh. Don’t take yourself too seriously. Show people that you
enjoy life.
7. Get other people to talk about themselves. Studies have shown that when
someone gets another person to talk about a favorite hobby, the person
doing the listening is considered more interesting.

How to achieve Good Human Relations

1. Be a good listener. Talk in terms of the other man’s interest.

2. Never forget to say a kind and encouraging word to or about somebody.
Praise good work done, regardless of who did it.
3. Be interested in others and be interested in their welfare.
4. Communicate cheerfulness. Keep the corners of your mouth turned up.
5. Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
6. Discourage gossip and make it a rule to say nothing about another unless
it is something good.
7. Do things to make people feel important.

The Ostrich Complex

 Is a habit of handling problems by avoiding them or pretending they

do not exist.
1. Procrastination - not facing a problem by putting it off.
2. Perfectionism - refusing to take an action if you can’t
everything to come out perfectly.
3. Denial - pretending that a problem simply does not
exist.
4. Collecting - acting as though you’re disregarding little
irritants but actually storing them up for an inevitable explosion.

? Questions

1. Explain the importance of human relations in the family, school and

community.
2. What is the most important factor to be considered in developing human
relations?
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COMMUNICATION
TOPIC 11

“No one is an island” is a very common adage which simply implies that
everyone communicates with one another whether through words, through body
movements, or through the eyes alone.

Advanced technology of today enables us to communicate easily with

someone in another country or to conduct business meetings with persons
coming from more than three countries taking together through overseas calls.
This is how sophisticated the communication system is.

It can be through gesturing, facial expressions, signs or symbols. Of

course, in modern times language—oral and written—dominates
communication activities. It is important in the management of organization. It
is the foundation of its cooperative efforts and the process by which people in an
organization can share the common meanings of things, places and events in the
symbols they are using.

Life without communication is inconceivable. It would not only be boring,

but it would be dead world. All the functions of management—planning,
organizing, staffing, motivating and controlling—obviously require
communication, especially leading. Communication is obviously the lifeblood of
an organization.

A manager involved in the managerial functions must lean to

communicate. Communication is integrated in almost everything he has to do.
To gain acceptance of the organization and its policies, to win the cooperation of
his employees, to get ideas and instructions clearly understood and to bring
about necessary changes in performance.

John Kotter defines communication as a process consisting of a sender

who transmits a message through media to a receiver who responds. On the
other hand, Warren Plunkett, states that communication is the transmission of
information and understanding from one person or group to another.

In other words, communication involved two parties, the sender and the
receiver. These two parties exchange intelligence, information or emotions by
writing, verbal or non-verbal means.

Types of Communication

There are various types of communication. These are also called the
media or channels of sending messages. There is no single medium or channel
which can be considered the best. It depends on situations. Here are the types of
communication:

1. Non-verbal—refers to information without the use of words, such as:

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 gestures and postures

 facial expressions and eye movements
 touch
 use of space
 use of time
 dress and personal grooming

2. Verbal—pertains to information with the use of words, like:

a. oral:
 telephone
 face-to-face
b. written:

 letter
 report
 memorandum

c. oral and written:

 electronic

The Importance of Communication

Managers need complete and correct information in order to perform

their functions efficiently and effectively. Information provides very important
inputs for management to be able to formulate the right objectives and strategies
for achieving its goals. Proper communication is always needed.

Decision making is a crucial information of management. It greatly

depends on accurate information. Wrong information means wrong decisions;
hence, the need for proper communication.

Managers do no only deal with their peers and subordinates, but also with
customers, suppliers and bankers. Their success in dealing with the said
outsiders greatly depends on their ability to communicate.

Responsibilities of the Sender

1. Knowing the purpose of communicating. It is necessary? Observe economies

of time and effort.
2. Knowing the receiver. The message should consider the level of the receiver.
The words should be clear, familiar and understandable to the receiver. The aim
of communication is to understand the message—not to impress the receiver
with the stock of vocabulary.
3. Choosing the appropriate medium. Such choice depends on the content of the
message, receiver, location and time of sending the message.
4. Selecting the proper time of communicating. It is not advisable to call
meetings or conferences when employees are in a hurry to go home because it is
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almost 5 pm. Timing of communication should be conducive to the physical and

mental conditions of the employees unless it is an emergency situation where
communication cannot be ignored or delayed.

Responsibilities of the Receiver

1. To listen to the sender or concentrate on the message. The receiver should be

attentive. Avoid any misinterpretation of the message.
2. To respect and understand the sender. Allow the sender to finish his message.
Consider the feelings and purposes of the sender. Personal biases or prejudices
should be eliminated in reacting to the sender or his/her message.
3. To suggest the proper medium. The receiver can help in the communication
process by suggesting the channels and format of the communication.
4. To react to the message. The receiver should register his reaction to the
message. The receiver may either ask for clarification or acknowledge that the
message has been understood.

Barriers to Effective Communication

On the book of Fajardo, he cited some of the most common barriers to

effective communication:

1. Individual variations in perceptions. Individuals with different cultural, social

and educational backgrounds tend to vary in their perceptions.
2. Differences in language. Some words may register different meanings to
different individuals. Vague or broad words should be defined so that they mean
the same to both sender and receiver. It is advisable to use specific, simple, clear
and familiar words, and short sentences in communications.
3. Presence of noise. It is difficult to clearly hear a message in a noisy
environment. The noise creates disturbance, confusion, or distortion in the
communication process. If it is difficult to hear a message, it is also difficult to
understand it.

Specifically there are two kinds of noise, the extrinsic and intrinsic noise.

4. Emotional reactions. Love, hate jealousy,

anger, fear or power strongly influence our responses to messages. We cannot
react objectively to our communications with other people when we are under
the influence of such emotions.
5. Verbal communication inconsistent with non-verbal communication. This
means words are not supported by actions. For example, we agree to cooperate
wholeheartedly with management. But our facial expressions do not show it and
our body movements lack enthusiasm.
6. Credibility of the sender. If the receiver does not trust or believe the sender
because he is not credible, then there is a communication barrier.
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Types of Organizational Communication

1. Vertical communication. This refers to the downward and upward

communication in an organization. Downward communication comes from top
management passing through middle management down to the employees. Its
objectives are to inform, instruct, direct, advise, and evaluate subordinates. The
upward communication’s purpose is to provide information to higher
management regarding activities, conditions and problems at the lower levels of
the organization.

Vertical communication is likely to be inaccurate and incomplete. As

communication passes through the various levels of the organization, the
messages are filtered, modified or “doctored”.

2. Lateral Communication. It takes place between and among departments in an

organization. This type of communication provides a direct medium for
coordination and problem solving in an organization. In addition, lateral
communication cements personal relationships among peers which enhances
employee satisfaction. This is good for the organization. Lateral communication
is informal. It is among friends and peers. Top management encourages such
communication, because it can depend on it for accurate information which is
vital to management, unlike in upward communication where there are social
and psychological inhibitions on the part of the subordinates.

Ten Commandments of Good Communication

The American Management Association, Inc. drafted the ten

commandments of communication which are designed to improve the skills of
managers in communicating with their superiors, subordinates, and associates.

1. Make your ideas clear before communicating.

2. Study the true purpose of each communication.
3. Consider the total physical and human setting whenever you communicate.
4. Plan your communication with the help of an expert.
5. Be aware of your voice, expression, choice of words, content of your message,
among others, while you communicate.
6. Convey something of value or immediate benefit to the receiver.
7. Encourage the receiver to express his reactions.
8. Your communication should be consistent with long range interests and goals.
9. Support your communication with actions; that is, do what you say.
10. Be a good listener.

? Questions
1. Define communication.
2. What is the role of communication in an organization?
3. Explain the barriers to effective communication.
4. Can an organization achieve something without communication?
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LEADERSHIP
TOPIC 12

In any group of people who work for a common objective, a leader is

indispensable(essential). As long as people congregate and gather together with
manifested direction, someone has to lead and the others become followers.

A leader is one who influences and directs others. He assumes

responsibilities to motivate his workers, encourages them, inspires them,
communicates with them and helps them attain their goals.

Pointers on becoming a leader

The knack(skill) for leadership is not born. It is built and developed in

the individual. They way a child is reared and trained from childhood will set
down the foundation for leadership – through the share of responsibilities, the
exercise of decision making, and the involvement in family affairs commensurate
with a child’s age.

As a leader when one has to explain or propose something new- plans,

ideas, products, and others one must expect hearers to be unfamiliar with it.
Words are not enough to make them see the new things one is talking about.

Personal attributes of a leader

Usually, a leaders has more personal attributes than an ordinary

member. He should excel in many aspects than the rest. It may be in general
intelligence, personality, and in his goals of serving other people. The following
factors are the most important attributes in a leader.

Competence - Correct decisions and actions at the right time and

situation.

Credibility - Actions done are consistent, fair and just.

Creativity - Provides participants with a high morale and new

techniques of doing things.

Common goals - attention to the overriding goals.

Dynamism - open mindedness for change. Change must bring about

improvement, progress, creativity, insight, foresight, and a macro perspective
outlook in the future.

Important Attitudes of a leader

1. Critical and experimental outlook - people, especially those

assuming positions of power and authority, should be keen, analytical,
and innovative, to improve the system, methods and procedures. They
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should avoid stereotyping, but should be dynamic and must advocate

continuous change as long as it is for progress.

2. Commitment to long term planning - long term planning is

important because it promotes insight, foresight, and perspective on
goals.

3. Interest in material things - concrete evidence of achievements

and undertaking are more appreciated and recognized especially now
that people hardly appreciate things which are abstract and spiritual.

4. Desire for change - Change is welcome as long as it is for

improvement. It is a sign of insecurity not to take risks in change. Before
one should initiate change, scientific procedure should be used to get the
data on the hand and to enable the workers to accept the changes.

5. Concern for time and punctuality - time and punctuality in work

are very important elements of success. Remember the long range plans
and the short range plans.

6. Respect for accuracy - in any form of activity, aspire for accuracy

because in the long run, one saves a lot of money, time, and effort by being
accurate.

7. Willingness to delegate authority - proper coordination and

delegation of power and authority is the secret of a good leader. Everyone
will have a feeling of importance and their potentials will be harnessed.

8. Delight in the imagination - through one’s imagination, creativity

and originality are born. Make the imagination fertile and productive so
that unforeseen problems can be predicted.

Skills of a leader

1. Conduct organizational needs assessment - this can be

done through the use of survey forms. A random interview among
colleagues may be effective.

2. Develop a Master Plan - to base the master plan on the data

gathered from the survey is scientific. Unforeseen problems may yet be
discovered through the survey which can provide the database for the
project.

3. Identify Current and Future Policy Issues - The current policies

should be well defined to determine their sustainability to the plan.

4. Conduct Studies on manpower needs - manpower is an

important item in project making. Manpower its competence, and
 2

available resources are important determinants of the success of the

projects.

5. Design Management Information System - how accessible is

pertinent information in the company or elsewhere for the projects?
Everything should be based on available and reliable information.

6. Plan a career development program - workers and leaders in

an industrial setting need to grow not only as individuals but also in
terms of professional and technical skills.

Leadership in a School setting

1. Seek the member’s cooperation and maintain good relationship with

them.
2. Follow up with co teachers the academic performance of their student
leaders.
3. Keep colleagues updated on school projects and activities.
4. Solicit their suggestions and constructive criticisms.
5. Endeavor to further develop skills of leadership.
6. With student leaders develop extra effort, training and development,
guidance, recognition, incentives, motivation, listening to their problems
and leadership competence.

Decision making is the conscious act of choosing from among a number of

options or courses of action. A decision always has several components; a desire
for better state of affairs, a manager who wishes to change the present state of
affairs, and a manager who has the needed abilities and resources to effect
change.

Steps to Effective Decision-Making

1. Define the problem correctly. Know definitely what one must accomplish.
2. Analyze the problem in the light of the objectives of the organization.
3. Review the resources, and relevant information available to solve the
problem.
4. Identify a number of possible courses of action and evaluate each in terms
of its ability to solve the problem.
5. Choose the solution that promises to be the most effective.
6. Put the solution into effect and issue the necessary orders and instructions
to see that it is carried out.
7. Monitor its implementation and get feedback as to its effectiveness so that
modification to the orders and instruction can be issued where necessary to
ensure the ultimate success of the decision.
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? Questions
1. Is leadership born or acquired? Why?
2. How can competencies in leadership be developed?
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GOOD MANNERS AND DECORUM

TOPIC 13

Knowledge of good manners adds to one’s self confidence and is of great

help in developing one’s personality. Those who practice good manners are
poised and at ease.

Manners are the ways of conducting oneself.

Good manners includes gentleness, modesty, and dignity. It is neatness
and correctness of dress in the home and in society.
Decorum is propriety and good taste in behavior, speech and dress.

Manners in the family

1. Parents violate their children’s privacy by opening letters addressed to

their children. Young people also violate parent’s privacy when they
rummage through personal belongings in search of shoes, jewelry,
neckties, cuff links, or other articles they wish to use.

2. Every member of the family should have the privilege of entertaining his
or her friends with a minimum interference from the rest of the family
unless the occasion is a family affair.

3. Knock and wait for an answer or for a door to be opened before entering.

4. Reply courteously to parents or to older members.

5. Use the magic words “excuse me,” “sorry” and “please” as the need arises.

6. Never open your parent’s drawers or bags without permission.

7. Never use others’ personal belongings, for the sake of personal hygiene.

8. Let your parents or at least a family member know when you have to
leave.

9. Avoid interrupting a conversation.

10. Never shout when something is being discussed.

11. When you get up from bed, leave it in order.

Table Manners

1. Be thoughtful are considerate of others.

2. Handle your table equipment correctly.

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3. Eat quietly, without attracting attention and without being offensive to

thers.

Specific rules for table manners

1. Everyone should come to the table properly groomed.

2. Come to the table promptly when called.

3. It is discourteous to make others wait for you and a sign of lack of

consideration for the person who prepared the meals.

4. Wait for others instead of rushing to the table ahead of them. When there
are older or more important persons, permit them to precede you to the
table.

5. Be seated only after all have assembled at the table and then sit down
from the left side of your chair. Everyone sits down at the table at the
same time.

6. When you are in a party you help or assist the lady by pulling out her
chair for her to sit.

7. If grace is to be said, sit or stand quietly while it is being done.

8. As soon as you are seated, keep your hands on your lap and your elbows
close to your sides so as not to interfere with someone next to you.

9. Put your napkin on your lap. Large napkins are partly unfolded; small
napkins are completely unfolded. At the end of the meal, lay the napkin at
the left side of the table setting.

10. Do not blow your soup to cool it. Wait until it is cool enough to eat.

11. Be observant of the needs of others. See that food is passed to them.

12. Sip soup quietly and at the side of your spoon. Do not gulp it, since this is
repulsive.

13. Keep your share in the conversation but avoid talking about unpleasant or
objectionable topics.

14. Apologize in the event of an accident and then try to forget your disaster.

15. Never reach or grab for food. Request pleasantly what you want.

16. Manage your silver inconspicuously and learn the rules for its correct
usage.
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17. After using the dessert spoon, leave it on the open plate or lay it on the
service plate.

Modesty

1. Wears simple and appropriate clothing at all occasions.

2. Wears jewelry and other accessories properly.

3. Avoids the use of excessive make up

4. Avoids giggling and laughing boisterously in public. A man is turned off

when he notices a girl behaving in such a manner.

5. Speaks well in a well modulated voice.

6. Refrains from boasting or bragging of her influential relatives, friends,

and acquaintances.

7. Does not use foul words in group conversations.

8. Avoid certain places of enjoyment or entertainment, especially where

men drink freely, because they are hunting grounds of the devil.

9. Does not accept expensive things from a man because that is bait to make
her swallow the hook.

10. Does not comb her hair nor cut/file her nails in public.

On taking a public/private vehicle

1. When riding a jeepney, wait for it at the PUJ loading and unloading shed.

2. When a PUJ stops, let the passengers come down first before you get in to
the jeepney.

3. Pay your fare before getting off.

4. It is always more polite for a gentleman to seat a lady on his right.

However, the make should always be at the dangers side.

5. A lady is assisted by her male companion in getting into a car, a taxi, or a

bus. He is allowed to put his hand under her elbow while assisting her.

6. In getting off a vehicle, the gentleman alights first and offers her his hand.

7. In her own car a lady always sits on the right hand side of the rear seat of
a car that is driven by a chauffeur.
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8. In the car or taxi, a lady sits at the edge of the seat, resting her hand on the
door handle or window, with knees bent.

Manners in the comfort room

1. Don’t talk or laugh boisterously, especially when you are with your
classmates or close friends. Your message is intended only for one or two
other persons but not for everyone inside.

2. Unless you can’t control your bladder, give ways if you see a teacher or a
superior. It is an act of courtesy and respect.

3. When you are combing your hair or powdering your face in front of the
mirror, be sure not to block the view of others.

4. If the comfort room is crowded, wait for your turn.

5. Don’t write your message to a friend on the walls or doors of the comfort
room. This is an act of vandalism.

Manners in Fiestas

1. Be friendly with the hostess and other guests.

2. Extend a helping hand with the hostess if necessary.

3. Wear appropriate clothes for the occasion.

4. Don’t take food to your home unless the hostess offers you some.

5. Bring a gift for the hostess when you are invited to the fiestas.

Manners in Formal Concerts

1. Dress properly

2. Clap your hands moderately

3. Avoid unnecessary noise

4. Conversation should be carried on softly

5. Don’t smoke in a no smoking area

Manners in Formal Reunions

1. Traditionally, younger members show respect to the elders by kissing

their hands.
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2. Younger people should make sure that the elders feel comfortable.

3. Participate in the program if there is any by doing your number.

4. Be hospitable to everyone.

5. Share in the expense and bring a gift for the hostess.

6. Send invitations way in advance.

7. Accidents are to be expected.

8. Be punctual in attendance. If you cannot make it send a note in advance.

9. A thank you note should follow after the occasion.

? Questions
1. How do parents violate their children’s privacy?
2. Why is it not proper to stay too long talking with someone over the

phone?