Things I Wish I Could've Told Him Ebook

Things I Wish
I Could’ve Told
M. SOSA
Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

Copyright © 2018 by M. Sosa
All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof
may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever
without the express written permission of the publisher
except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
First Printing, June 2018
ISBN: 978-0-9951533-8-7

NOTE:
Feel free to change the pronoun or noun to
any gender. We all go through similar
heartbreaks so these words can be
used by anybody.
I’m referring to my past in this book.

Things I Wish I Could've Told Him
“I held on to you because

there was always a piece of hope
left within me that believed
you’d come back…
someday.”
4
“I finally made peace

with all the broken pieces
of my past, and forgiving myself
was the first step to
getting over you.”
5
“I don’t know why I stayed when

I knew how unhappy I was.
I guess my mistake was
staying longer than I should have.”
6
“You know when you’re tired of trying,

tired of not saying a word when things bother you,
tired of the restless nights, tired of pretending things
are okay, tired of holding on when you know
you should be letting go.”
7
“I fight with myself daily

because I’m stuck believing
what my heart is feeling instead
of facing the truth and
believing my mind.”
8
“Maybe I’m scared of starting over

because I’m worried they’ll end up
hurting me like you did.”
9
“The truth is
I still love you
and I probably always will.
I lie to everybody around me
because I don’t want them
to know I’m still stuck on you.
Stupid in love.”
10
“And just like that, strangers is all we were.”
11
“The harsh reality is that you’re gone

and you’re not coming back.
I have to let our past go
if I want to feel liberated.”
12
“There’s nothing wrong in missing him.

There’s nothing wrong in hoping.
There’s nothing wrong in believing.
Just don’t waste years of your life
holding on to a fantasy.”
13
“The day will come when you remember

all the bullshit you put me through.
You’ll remember how I stuck by you when nobody
else would and it’ll hurt to know that you once had
somebody that loved you unconditionally.”
14
“You had me,

and that was
always enough.”
15
“The biggest lesson

I learned from you
was knowing when to leave
when a relationship felt dead.”
16
“Thanks to you, I’m stronger than ever.

I no longer cry out your name in my sleep.
I don’t blame myself for everything
that went wrong between us
because I know I gave it my all.”
17
“Your friends said I was no good for you

because they never knew what a good woman was
…and you believed them.”
18
“Even after you left,

I waited patiently for you to come back
until I noticed you moved on without me.
She was brand new, fresh meat,
someone that didn’t know all your flaws.
She was your everything, while I was
nothing more than your crazy ex. ”
19
“I took you back, over and over,

because I thought you’d change
but no matter how hard we tried,
you always showed your true colors
by breaking my heart.”
20
“There’s nothing worse than a selfish man

that believes he is owed the world.
He mistreats his woman by ignoring her
wants and needs, and only puts his first.
Ignores her cry for help because he’s too busy
living his life and forgets that she’s part of it too.”
21
“Sometimes, I wonder
if you miss me too.”
22
“There’s no point denying that

you miss someone when you know
they’re all you can think about.”
23
“Time heals all wounds

but sometimes,
the wounds are too deep
and feel like it’ll take an eternity to fix.”
24
“Nobody will ever understand all the love

I felt for you. They’ll see me smiling and laughing,
living my best life without realizing how broken
I’m feeling inside.
Don’t always believe everything you see.”
25
“Do you know what it’s like to feel violated,

disappointed, abandoned and love all at once,
and still want the person back even if
they don’t feel the same way anymore?
I did, the day you left.”
26
“Sometimes, I ask myself why I even

bothered loving you so much when all
you did was break me down.”
27
“Not everyone is meant

to stay forever.”
28
“Never put yourself in a situation

where you’re always the one chasing.”
29
“I stopped checking for you

because it hurt me more to see
what you were doing,
living happily without me.”
30
“I couldn’t move on because I kept

searching for you in everybody I met.
As much as I tried to move on with my life,
you haunted me. I would remember all the places we
went, the kisses we shared, your scent and most of all,
the agony of not having you by my side anymore.”
31
“Remember when you told me forever?
They were all lies.”
32
“I want to see you suffer and beg, like I did.

And maybe that won’t be enough because I know it
won’t change the fact that you’ll never fully
comprehend the humiliation you put me through.”
33
“There are times when I look up at the sky

and gaze at the stars way up above,
and I can’t help but wonder
if you’re staring at them too.”
34
“Maybe I don’t forgive you and it’s all a charade.

It’s a way to lie to myself in order to convince me that
I’m over you… when I’m clearly not.”
35
“The one thing you’ll never see me

do is beg for you to love me.
If you’re not able to see my worth
and everything I bring to the table,
then you were never the right man for me.”
36
“Someday, you’ll remember a silly moment

we shared and tons of memories
will come flashing back.
Just knowing that puts a smile on my face.”
37
“It’s painful to wait for someone

but it’s even harder to forget.”
38
“The only reason we fear letting our ex go

is because we fear not knowing what comes next,
or maybe it’s the fear of being alone.”
39
“You didn’t notice

but I finally cut the cord.
I freed myself of everything
you used to mean to me.”
40
“Sometimes, the best thing you can

do is not obsess, not overthink.
Just believe what’s meant to be, will be.”
41
“I gave you my word that

I’d stick by you forever.
I can see that you never meant it.”
42
“So, I see you’re having a baby with her.

Part of me is happy for you
and the other part hates you
because that should have been me.”
43
“Just because he’s confused

about what he wants doesn’t mean
you have to waste your time waiting.”
44
“I kept blaming myself for your mistakes

while you were out there living the happy life.
Selfish, that’s all that you are
and all that you’ll ever be.”
45
“Maybe part of my fantasy was believing

that what we once had would
somehow happen again.”
46
“I can’t blame you for everything

because I knew exactly what type of man you were.
But, I chose to stay because I thought maybe,
just maybe, you would love me someday.”
47
“Do you expect me to smile after

everything you did to me? I’m devastated.
I’m empty. I’m not the same. I spend days and night
awake wondering where you are and who you’re
with. I’m restless. I’m anxious. I’m every word in the
book all bundled up in one. And through it all, I have
to wonder if you ever even truly loved me?”
48
“Anybody that can leave you,

without thinking twice about the pain
they’re going to cause you,
isn’t meant for you.
Let them go.”
49
“You were toxic and I knew it,

but I still wanted you to come back.”
50
“Someday, someone will look at me

with the same eyes you once did,
but they’ll stay… they’ll stay.”
51
“Stop investing your time and energy

on someone who isn’t willing
to treat you better.”
52
“You can’t control who you love

but you are responsible for how someone treats you.
If you know they’re not giving you what you deserve,
tell them and make sure they modify their behaviour
towards you. But, don’t stay stuck hoping they’ll
change if you’re not able to communicate how you
feel. You matter. Never forget that.”
53
“Loving your potential was my downfall.

I should have known better than to
fall in love with a pretty face.”
54
“The days felt so long when you left.

I counted every minute, every hour
hoping I’d see your face once more
but you were too busy to notice.
You were already dating someone new,
ignoring all the misery I was going through.
Shows what kind of man you are.”
55
“Unhealthy relationships
shouldn’t be worshipped.
Something that toxic
should be despised.”
56
“If I gave you a second chance,

would you do the same things
or would you learn from your mistakes
and make the effort?
Decisions… decisions.”
57
“You kept breaking my heart

and I kept going back
because you were all that I knew.
That’s when it finally hit me
that I was the one sabotaging myself.”
58
“I forgave your indiscretions,

pushed aside all the heartache
and accepted your false promises
because I didn’t want to give up
on everything I had worked so hard to build.”
59
“You’re wasting years of your life

with someone who continually hurts you,
instead of being with someone who builds you up.”
60
“The pain of admitting failure is harder

than admitting what we once shared was a farce.”
61
“Our relationship had no foundation.

I could’ve tried harder.
You could’ve believed more in us.
Half promises never fulfilled
and now everything
we have left are memories.”
62
“Putting my life back together

was hard, knowing
you’d no longer
be a part of it.”
63
“Everywhere I look, you’re all that I see.

I remember all the good times we shared
instead of remembeing all the sorrow
you left me with.”
64
“Can you blame me for being jealous

of your future lovers?
They’ll get to experience

what my heart once felt.”
65
“That’s the thing about unconditional love,

you give without expecting anything back,
and maybe I’m inconsiderate for
expecting more from you.”
66
“There’s nothing I need more

than loyalty and love.”
67
“Everything you did made me smile,

and I keep wondering if I’ll ever see
that same smile again.”
68
“Potential is a killer.
Don’t stick around waiting for them
to be someone they’re not.”
69
“The only thing I’m focusing on right now

is growing, healing, and making sure I never
feel helpless. I’m building a stronger version of
myself and nobody is going to stand in my way.”
70
“Will my heart skip a beat?

Will I start sweating tremendously?
Will you stop and talk, or
will you pass me by as if I don’t exist?
Will you think of me all day
and wonder what could have been?
Will you call me and ask for forgiveness?
So many questions flood my mind
when I think of bumping into you.”
71
“If the universe is

forcing him out your life,
let him go.”
72
“There was never anything wrong with me.

You treated me poorly which shows
there was something wrong with you all along.
Anybody that loves you dearly doesn’t
go around destroying people that love them.”
73
“You lying, cheating,

irresponsible douchebag.
I can’t believe I stuck around
waiting for you to come back.”
74
“I lost myself loving you,

and now I have to find myself
and get reacquainted with who I used to be.”
75
“I should’ve listened when they

told me not to run back to my ex.
That shit didn’t work out for a reason
but I guess being foolishly in love
makes you do the dumbest things.”
76
“I don’t have trust issues.

I have YOU issues.”
77
“If he wants to walk away,

hold the door wide open
and let him go.
There’s nothing worse
than begging someone
to stay when they don’t value
what they’re letting go of.”
78
“You never deserved a place in my heart.

It was hard to accept but I see it now…
I see it clearly.”
79
“You knew I’d stay no matter

what you said or did to me.
Your narcissistic ways blocked me
from seeing who you really were.”
80
“I should’ve let you go

the moment I realized
you were draining my happiness.”
81
“I got lost in your words until

I remembered your actions.
They always spoke louder
than your false promises.”
82
“Being a good woman to yourself

is more important than being
a good woman to any man.”
83
“I fell in love with the hallucination

of who you once were.
And everyday,
I realize everything I thought
I loved about you isn’t there anymore.”
84
“Maybe I don’t miss you.

Maybe I only miss the time I spent with you.”
85
“The best decision you’ll ever do for your heart,

your soul and your sanity is to leave
when someone is toxic.
There’s no point in fighting
for someone who’s constantly
making your life a living hell.”
86
“When I stopped focusing

my energy on you,
I was able to focus that same energy
on healing myself.”
87
“One thing I learned a long time ago

was to never ignore the red flags in the beginning,
or they’ll be the same reason it all ends.”
88
“You kept crawling back into my life

because you were tired of the person
you tried to replace me with.
Shame on me for believing you actually cared.”
89
“I kept breaking my heart,

taking him back, knowing he was
never going to change.”
90
“I hope you find someone

who loves you the way I did.”
91
“Did you ever think twice

about how I would feel after you left?
I guess not because you’ve never
checked up on me since.”
92
“Heartbreak after heartbreak,

you’ll eventually learn that not everybody
deserves to be surrounded by you.”
93
“You can deny it all you want

but I know a little piece of me
will always be with you.”
94
“Parts of me long for your touch,

just want to feel your lips, your body,
one more time.”
95
“I’m ashamed to admit how much I miss you.

I know I shouldn’t be thinking about someone
who’s caused me emotional distress but
you’re the only one that knew me better
than I knew myself.
Maybe that’s why I’m stuck thinking

about you all the time.”
96
“I thought parts of me felt imcomplete

without you laying next to me,
but it was worse sleeping next to someone
that made me feel alone, each night.”
97
“I forgive you.
You’ve moved on with someone else,
and even though years have passed,
you still cross my mind every now and then.
It’s no longer love but I’m stuck on
who you used to be, and
I wonder if you’re going to end up
hurting her the same way.“
98
“I knew.
I just played stupid
to see if you’d be honest.”
99
“I thought we were unbreakable

but your actions showed me otherwise.”
100
“You kept treating me the way

you felt about yourself.”
101
“Don’t believe them

when they keep disappointing you.
You’re nobody’s fool.
102
“At the end of it all,

everything happened
the way it was supposed to.
There’s a lesson in everything
I’ve been through, that helped me grow
and helped me heal.
Everything that I thought was

breaking me was actually shaping me
into the wonder woman I am today.”
103
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Things I Wish I Could’ve Told Him
2018

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Things I Wish

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

First Printing, June 2018

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

I’m referring to my past in this book.

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

“I held on to you because

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

“I finally made peace

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

“I don’t know why I stayed when

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

“You know when you’re tired of trying,

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

“I fight with myself daily

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

“Maybe I’m scared of starting over

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

“And just like that, strangers is all we were.”

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

“The harsh reality is that you’re gone

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

“There’s nothing wrong in missing him.

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

“The day will come when you remember

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

“You had me,

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

“The biggest lesson

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

“Thanks to you, I’m stronger than ever.

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

“Your friends said I was no good for you

…and you believed them.”

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

“Even after you left,

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

“I took you back, over and over,

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

“There’s nothing worse than a selfish man

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

“There’s no point denying that

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

“Time heals all wounds

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

“Nobody will ever understand all the love

Don’t always believe everything you see.”

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

“Do you know what it’s like to feel violated,

I did, the day you left.”

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

“Sometimes, I ask myself why I even

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

“Not everyone is meant

Prepared exclusively for cheryl_manapol@yahoo.com Transaction: 0049970512

“Never put yourself in a situation