The Epicurean Mom

Our Town
Concerts at MUS, Elmo, and the YMCA

wrap up Christmas and end-of-year
musical celebrations, p. 29
Leaving It All Behind
Lily and Kate Mazza wonder How will
Santa find us? as they explore the jungle
near the Thai-Burma border, p. 17
Trail Talk
Many of Santa Barbaras finest took
their last trail ride in 2011; Lynn Kirst
remembers some of them, p. 22
The Voice of the Village SSINCE 1995 S
The best things in life are
FREE
29 Dec 2011 5 Jan 2012
Vol 17 Issue 52

COMMUNITY CALENDAR, P. 10 CALENDAR OF EVENTS, P. 32 GUIDE TO MONTECITO EATERIES, P. 34
Montecito-based former
Monaco spymaster Robert
Eringer pens Cloak &
Corkscrew: Where CIA
Meets Hollywood, p. 6
Mineards
Miscellany
Katie Koonce began blogging as Epicureanmom.com;
now her clear and easy-to-follow recipes (along with
temptingly crisp photos) attract an international audience
(story on page 20)
THE EPICUREAN MOM
Matt Middlebrook,
Caruso Affiliated
(full story on page 6)
Matt Middlebrook,
Caruso Affiliated
(full story on page 6)
29 December 2011 5 January 2012 MONTECITO JOURNAL 2 The Voice of the Village
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5 Editorial
Profle of Dr. Paul Hansma, inventor of the Reference
Point Indenter
6 Montecito Miscellany
Robert Eringer publishes sixth novel; Tom Wathen takes
friends for a ride on DC-3; Ivan Arroyo opens own
restaurant; David Zaslav asks OWN viewers to hang on;
Katy Perry and Russell Brand head to India; Santa Barbara
Revels Bavarian Celebration; Jude Bijous book bash;
Sandringham House packed; launch of a million dollar
perfume; Kate Middletons hairstylist quits salon
8 Letters to the Editor
Bob Largura thanks Richie; gift recommendation from
expert Dale Lowdermilk; Tim Werner advises on what
Montecito needs; Daniel Seibert captures the lunar eclipse
10 Community Calendar
New Years Eve in Montecito; Pops Concert at Granada;
YMCA open house; MBAR and MA meetings; San Ysidro
Pathway opening; MERRAG meets; ongoing events
Tide Guide
Handy guide to assist readers in determining when to take
that walk or run on the beach
12 Village Beat
Montecito Rotarians volunteer in the Congo; MERRAG to
celebrate 25 years of service
14 Seen Around Town
Ribbon cutting ceremony for new Friendship Center
location; Mental Health Association fundraiser luncheon;
Antioch University Santa Barbara event at University Club
17 Leaving it all Behind
Te Mazzas fgure out how to reach Santa from a jungle in
Tailand
20 LifeStyle
Santa Barbara native Katie Koonce combines motherhood,
her love of food, and healthy meals on her blog
22 Trail Talk
Remembrance of those who left the trail this past year
23 Book Talk
Ian Rankins latest thriller has a new protagonist: Inspector
Malcolm Fox
24 Sheriffs Blotter
Auto theft on Butterfy Lane; residential burglary on Hill
Road; public intoxication arrest; theft in Summerland
26 Montecito Diary
Local eye doctor Dr. Dante Pieramici takes his family on
humanitarian mission to Honduras
29 Our Town
MUS, ELMO, and YMCA holiday concerts
32 Calendar of Events
Wanda Jackson brings rockabilly to SOhO; Kenny
Loggins and Lois Mahalia ring in the new year; Fishbons
New Years Eve; Ojai Concert Series; Jim Kimo West plays
SOhO; Hot Tuna and David Bromberg rock the Lobero;
Sara Bareilles at Granada; Kamatana at SOhO; NECTAR at
Yoga Soup; SOS season kicks of
33 Ernies World
Ernies artifcial Christmas tree somehow doesnt make
things easier
34 Guide to Montecito Eateries
Te most complete, up-to-date, comprehensive listing of all
individually owned Montecito restaurants, cofee houses,
bakeries, gelaterias, and hangouts; some in Santa Barbara,
Summerland, and Carpinteria too
36 On Entertainment
Robert Bernhardt conducts Santa Barbara Symphony on
New Years Eve; Picasso at the Lapin Agile at Museum of
Art; SBIFF announces opening flm
38 Classifed Advertising
Our very own Craigslist of classifed ads, in which sellers
ofer everything from summer rentals to estate sales
39 Local Business Directory

Smart business owners place business cards here so
readers know where to look when they need what those
businesses ofer
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29 December 2011 5 January 2012 MONTECITO JOURNAL 5 Whenever people agree with me I always feel I must be wrong Oscar Wilde
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Holiday Glamor
UCSB: A Hot Bed Of Invention and Research
D
uring the holidays Ive had occasion to attend a series of events that
featured a number of UCSB professors. To a man and woman, they
have proven to be a highly intelligent, curious, really interesting, and
sometimes even slightly whacky, group of industrious and inventive people.
Over the course of the next few months, Montecito Journal (and I in particular)
will introduce readers to some of them, their ideas, philosophies, inventions,
passions, and quirks. We hope youll fnd them as fascinating as we have.
Reference Point Indenter
We were at the hillside home of Lad Handelman, where a small group of
supporters and potential investors gathered recently to hear UCSB Professor
Dr. Paul Hansma, inventor of what he and his business partner Davis Brimer,
Founder and CEO of Active Life Scientific, Inc., are calling a Reference Point
Indenter under the trademark BioDent. Dr. Hansma, a physicist, is also cred-
ited as a principal inventor of the atomic force microscope (AFM); his research
group has been working with, developing, and building them for the past
twenty years.
Dr. Hansma began his most recent research using his microscopes to study
various things, most especially abalone shells, with Professor of Environmental
Science and Management Dan Morris and Galen Stucky, Professor of
Chemistry & Materials in the Biomolecular Science and Engineering Program.
Dan was interested in abalone shells as a biologist. Galen Stucky was inter-
ested in them, Dr. Hansma explains during our casual conversation, because
an abalone shell has only three percent protein by weight and ninety seven per-
cent crystal and calcium carbonate, but it is three thousand times more fracture
resistant than pure calcium carbonate, so somehow that three percent of protein
made it three thousand times more fracture resistant.
One of the things they found was that protein molecules had qualities called
sacrificial bonds and hidden links, which turned out to be ways of incredibly
toughening material. It is a mechanism we discovered, Dr. Hansma continues,
which was a secret to the abalones amazing fracture resistance. After that
discovery, he and his cohort looked at other marine minerals and bio-minerals,
but Hansma understood that the bio-mineral thats really important to people
is the human bone.
Might there be some of the same kind of molecules we found in the abalone
shell in bones? Dr. Hansma wondered. Might fracture resistance in bone
come from the same reason that the abalone has its fracture resistance? he
asked. Sure enough, he says, there were such molecules in the bone: human
bone, mouse bone, bovine bone, any bone. He speculated that perhaps these
protein molecules were part of the secret to bone fracture resistance. The team
began looking for those secrets with their atomic-force microscopes.
Dr. Hansma began talking about the subject of fracture resistance at various
international bone conferences, and about six or seven years ago, after giving
a talk, a physician named Adolfo Diaz Perez a real thought leader in the
Editorial
by James Buckley
UCSB Physics Professor Dr. Paul Hansma and his former pupil, now business partner in Active Life
Scientific, Inc., Davis Brimer
EDITORIAL Page 194
P
rince Albert of Monacos
nemesis, Robert Eringer, whose
battle royal with His Serene
Highness over more than $500,000 in
back salary as his spymaster continues
to wend through the U.S. courts, has
been putting his background in the
Mediterranean principality to good
use.
Next month he publishes his sixth
book, Cloak & Corkscrew: Where CIA
Meets Hollywood.
I first had the idea for this about
five years ago when I was running
the intelligence service for Albert,
explains Robert. A liaison partner
from another intelligence service con-
veyed to me a funny story about the
CIAs office in Los Angeles. It stuck
with me.
While visiting Washington, D.C. two
years back, Robert met with a retired
friend from the CIAs operations direc-
torate and learned a lot about the agen-
cys connection with Hollywood.
What I learned became the basis
of my novel. As with most novels, the
gestation period mind mulching
took longer than the actual writing,
about two months. At one point, I got
fed up with espionage and stopped.
Over a year later, I picked up the
unfinished manuscript, read it, loved
it, and I completed it in a week.
Robert, 57, says the CIA has an
intriguing relationship with
Tinseltown, which even leads to turf
wars between the agency and the FBI.
For decades, a division called
Domestic Contacts ran the CIAs U.S.
operations. A few years ago, its name
was changed to Foreign Research
Division. Today, the operatives of
Foreign Research cultivate foreign
nationals that attend trade shows and
universities in the U.S., recruiting
them to spy in their spheres of exper-
tise upon returning home.
Officers from this division also
recruit U.S. citizens traveling abroad,
using them for special access to peo-
ple and to places of interest that are
otherwise hard to reach. Some recruits
go mostly unpaid, willing to cooper-
ate purely for patriotic reasons.
Robert describes Los Angeles as the
agencys most unique domestic sta-
tion, as it is from there that agents cul-
tivate and recruit Hollywood celebri-
ties to spy for them abroad.
His new tome is a fictionalized ver-
sion of how the CIA operates, with
box office star Josh Penner meeting
Venezuelas Hugo Chavez as an agent,
and the ensuing entanglements.
Cloak & Corkscrew will be available
globally on Amazon, with an e-book
Kindle edition in due course...
Living the High Life
When Montecitos Tom Wathen
takes friends out for a spin, he does it
in quite splendid fashion.
Tom, 82, who used to head the
Pinkerton National Detective Agency,
has been an accomplished flyer for 53
years, even buying his own airport,
Flabob in Riverside, a year after his
retirement in 1999.
Since the 50s he has owned 15
planes, but one of his favorites is a
DC-3 a former World War II C-47
built in 1943, which he has restored.
So the other day Tom and his wife,
Carol, invited fellow Montecitans,
Jane and Jim Burkemper, and Hope
Ranch couple, Diana and Paul
OKeefe for a high flying tea, leav-
FOR VOTING THE GRANADA THEATRE
BEST PLACE TO SEE A PERFORMANCE
CAMA PRESENTS
THEATER LEAGUE PRESENTS
UCSB ARTS AND LECTURES PRESENTS
SANTA BARBARA SYMPHONY PRESENTS
SANTA BARBARA SYMPHONY PRESENTS
KIDS HELPING KIDS AND DECKERS PRESENT
New Novel for Eringer
Monte ito
Miscellany
by Richard Mineards
Richard covered the Royal Family for Britains Daily Mirror and Daily Mail before moving to New York
to write for Rupert Murdochs newly launched Star magazine in 1978; Richard later wrote for New York
magazines Intelligencer. He continues to make regular appearances on CBS, ABC, and CNN, and
moved to Montecito four years ago.
Robert Eringer
puts his spy
background
to good use in
new novel
ing from Atlantic Aviation at Santa
Barbara Airport and flying up to the
Vandenberg Air Force Base area.
It was the most enormous fun,
says Jane. The plane is still pretty
basic, but very well preserved. It was
the oldest plane weve ever flown in
and quite massive. But, given its pro-
pellers, its amazingly quiet.
Tom flew quite low and it couldnt
have been a more perfect day, although
it was quite windy. The views were
spectacular. It was one of lifes magic
little moments!
The high life, indeed...
Like Father, Like Son
Ivan Arroyo is following in his
father Alfredos culinary footsteps.
Alfredo has worked at the popular
nosheteria, Caf Del Sol, for near-
ly four decades and is now general
manager for owners, Jack and Emilie
Sears.
Ivan, 26, started working at the eat-
ery by the bird refuge at the age of 10
during his summer vacations, helping
in the kitchen.
Ive grown up in the restaurant
business, but I had to really earn my
job, he says. I became a busboy and
then a waiter, but I always wanted to
open my own place.
That dream came true last year
when Ivan and his fiance, Ashton
Falchi, a student at cosmetology
school, opened their 100-seater res-
taurant, Las Aves Caf on Bath Street
in Santa Barbara, which he describes
as having continental cuisine with a
Spanish flair.
My father has, of course, given me
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MISCELLANy Page 184
Paul and Diana
OKeefe, Jane
Burkemper,
Carol and Tom
Wathen, and
Jim Burkemper
in front of
Toms impos-
ing DC-3
If you have something you think Montecito should know about, or wish to respond to something
you read in the Journal, we want to hear from you. Please send all such correspondence to:
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93108. You can also FAX such mail to: (805) 969-6654, or E-mail to jim@montecitojournal.net
LETTERS TO THE EDITOR

Shave and a Haircut
R
ecently, two young U.S. Marines
enjoyed a wonderful experience
at Richie the Barbers. Two
marines enrolled in Special Operations
were in need of a haircut. While their
hair was only a quarter-inch long, their
heads needed to be shaved. Richie
immediately invited the two of them
to sit down with his very attractive
young lady barbers, Loran and Emily,
and served refreshments while the
men were getting cleaned up. When
it came to pay, Richie said it was his
pleasure and no payment would be
accepted.
Thank you Richie from the U.S.
Marines. You made their trip to Santa
Barbara an unforgettable experience.
Bob Largura
Montecito
Experts At Work
Thank goodness the experts at
the National Transportation Safety
Board are targeting distracted
drivers. For years, our organization
has pushed for more regulation over
what goes on in moving vehicles
and this is only the first giant step
towards total safety. Its also good
to see how few people are resist-
ing or questioning the its-for-your-
own-good attitude that drives most
bureaucrats and our insatiable
dependence upon experts. This
addiction may be more dangerous
than all the text-messages ever sent.
In the July-Aug 1981 issue of the
Journal of Irreproducible Results, we
suggested that to prevent distracted
driving, all radio and stereo equip-
ment be removed from cars and
that stun-gun-like devices within
the car seat be automatically acti-
vated when any passenger becomes
obnoxious, uppity, rowdy or argu-
mentative.
As pointed out in several other
issues of the JIR (2001 & 2006), some
experts believe senile drivers are just
as dangerous as drunks. Or that an
angry driver can be as reckless as
someone trying to inhale a cheese-
burger, sipping a double-latte-crap-
pachino or multitasking with a hand-
kerchief in their nose.
While everyone is in the safety-
first-last-and-always holiday mode,
please be sure to read why CPSC
experts recommend Bloat Balls as the
Worlds Safest Toy.
Remember, real experts may not
know your phone number, or Social
Security number, but theyre certainly
willing to take a guess.
Dale Lowdermilk
Montecito
(Editors note: Mr. Lowdermilk is
founder and publisher of the Journal of
Irreproducible Results and notsafe.org; he
claims to be the Worlds Foremost Expert
on experts J.B.)
Montecito ys
Wherefore
Dear fellow Montecitans. An excit-
ing time for our community is at hand.
Our YMCA is embarking on a Capital
Campaign to remodel its outdated,
obsolete facilities to address the current
needs of our whole community.
Over the past four years the YMCA
has embarked on an arduous process
surveying current members, program
participants, neighboring schools and
even hiring an outside firm that con-
tacted six hundred residents in our
service area to find out exactly what
our community would like the Y to
provide. This master planning process
has provided the YMCA with a blue-
print for our communitys needs.
You may ask, what does Montecito
need? The answer is that while
Montecito is a fantastic community in
so many aspects, it also fails to provide
many basic community needs. What
our research has shown us is there is
a need for expanding our pool space
to service our active aquatic program.
Public feedback has also shown a need
for a warm pool that could be used for
teaching our young to swim while
also assisting our elderly with reha-
bilitation in therapeutic warm water.
Research has also shown that there is
no gymnasium in our community for
our youth to participate in basketball,
volleyball and other indoor sports,
regardless of the weather conditions
(which are currently only offered in
other communities).
Because Montecito is a community
with such diverse interests and extreme-
ly active lifestyles we need to provide
more for our residents. Now is the time
to rise to the occasion, and invest in
our future. Our community needs these
facilities. This year, the YMCA enters its
125th year servicing the Santa Barbara
area, so please support the Montecito
YMCA Capital Campaign as we look
forward to provide for our community
for the next 125 years.
Tim Werner
Parent, Volunteer and
Capital Committee Chair
Montecito YMCA

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The best little paper in America
(Covering the best little community anywhere!)
29 December 2011 5 January 2012 MONTECITO JOURNAL 9 I cannot trust a man to control others who cannot control himself Robert E. Lee
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Don Gragg 805.453.0518 License #951784
Occupying Camp Four
I hope you will consider the fol-
lowing letter for the Montecito Journal.
Your paper is very well respected and
as I understand it from Montecito resi-
dents, everyone reads it!
Who will get the signatures:
Congressman Gallegly, Santa Barbara
County Supervisors, or Governor
Brown?
The Santa Ynez community is abuzz
with the latest regarding Camp 4,
the 1,400 acres in the heart of the Santa
Ynez Valley owned by the Chumash
Casino tribe (Santa Ynez Band of
Mission Indians). Apparently, the
Chumash Casino tribal government
is using new tactics to resist residents
opposition to their plans to take the
1,400 acres under their control.
Supposedly they have collected
2,500 petitions.
At this time we do not know what
politician(s) will receive these peti-
tions. Remember, it takes a politician
to sell out a community. And also
remember the following: according to
a 2005 letter from the Office of former
Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger,
in pre-contact times there was no
Santa Ynez Band of Mission Indians or
any single independent political entity
constituting a collection of the many
different villages in the Santa Ynez
Valley, and per the 2009 United States
Supreme Court Carcieri Decision,
there is a question if the Chumash
Casino tribe (Santa Ynez Band of
Mission Indians) is a tribal govern-
ment eligible for expansion of land
into federal trust.
In addition, when the expansion
plans came up a few months ago, Santa
Barbara attorney Barry Cappello sent
a letter to the Supervisors stating that
their participation in moving the 1,400
acres into trust would be illegal unless
they first went through the Santa Ynez
Valley Community Plan amendment
process.
Last week, Congressman
Galleglys Solvang staff said that the
Congressman had received virtually
no letters of support for the Chumash
Casino tribes plans on Camp 4. He
said that our community should be
grateful that we have an honorable
Congressman who will listen to our
community.
What lucky politician will get these
2,500 signatures? It will be enter-
taining to see if he-she-they think
this document provides the politi-
cal cover to ignore the United States
Supreme Court, the facts document-
ed by the Office of former Governor
Schwarzenegger, the established pro-
cess for amending the Santa Ynez
Valley Community Plan, and the resi-
dents of Santa Barbara County living
in the Santa Ynez Valley, and over the
hill in Santa Barbara and Montecito,
who stridently oppose the removal of
this 1,400 acres from local and state
jurisdiction into trust.
To view the Office of former
Governor Schwarzeneggers letter,
contact information for your elected
officials, and to donate go to: www.
polosyv.org. To donate to the Camp
4 and related expenses account, send
your check to Preservation of Los
Olivos. Under the memo section of
your check write Camp 4. Send
your donation to PO Box 722, Los
Olivos, Ca. 93441. P.O.L.O. is a 501 c
4 non-profit corporation. Check with
your tax advisor for deductibility.
Kathy Cleary
Los Olivos
(Editors note: Kathy Cleary is president
of Preservation of Los Olivos (POLO), a
grass roots citizen group)
A Matter Of Principle
In 1952, Armon M. Sweat, Jr., a
member of the Texas House of
Representatives, was asked about his
position on whiskey. What follows
is his exact answer (taken from the
Archives of Texas):
If you mean whiskey, the devils
brew, the poison scourge, the bloody
monster that defiles innocence,
dethrones reason, destroys the home,
creates misery and poverty, yea, liter-
ally takes the bread from the mouths
of little children; if you mean that
evil drink that topples Christian men
and women from the pinnacles of
righteous and gracious living into the
bottomless pit of degradation, shame,
despair, helplessness, and hopeless-
ness, then, my friend, I am opposed to
it with every fiber of my being.
However, if by whiskey you mean
the lubricant of conversation, the phil-
osophic juice, the elixir of life, the
liquid that is consumed when good
fellows get together, that puts a song
in their hearts and the warm glow of
contentment in their eyes; if you mean
Christmas cheer, the stimulating sip
that puts a little spring in the step
of an elderly gentleman on a frosty
morning; if you mean that drink that
enables man to magnify his joy, and
to forget lifes great tragedies and
heartbreaks and sorrow; if you mean
that drink the sale of which pours into
Texas treasuries untold millions of
dollars each year, that provides tender
care for our little crippled children,
our blind, our deaf, our dumb, our
pitifully aged and infirm, to build the
finest highways, hospitals, universi-
ties, and community colleges in this
nation, then my friend, I am absolute-
ly, unequivocally in favor of it.
This is my position, and as always,
I refuse to compromise on matters of
principle.
Forwarded by
Randolph Siples
Ventura
LETTERS Page 114
When: 7 pm to 10 pm
Info: 969-8500
MONDAYS
Story Time at the Library
When: 10:30 to 11 am
Where: Montecito Library,
1469 East Valley Road
Info: 969-5063
Connections Early Memory Loss
Program
Where: Friendship Center,
89 Eucalyptus Lane
Info: Susan Forkush,
969-0859 x15
TUESDAYS
Boy Scout Troop 33 Meeting
Open to all boys ages 11-17;
visitors welcome
When: 7:15 pm
Where: Scout House, Upper Manning
Park, 449 San Ysidro Road
THURSDAYS
Pick-up Basketball Games
He shoots; he scores! The Montecito
Family YMCA is offering pick-up
basketball on Thursdays at 5:30 pm.
Join coach Donny for warm-up, drills
and then scrimmages. Adults welcome
too.
When: 5:30 pm
Where: Montecito Family YMCA,
591 Santa Rosa Lane
Info: 969-3288
FRIDAYS
Farmers Market
When: 8 am to 11:15 am
Where: South side of Coast Village Road
SUNDAYS
Vintage & Exotic Car Day
Motorists and car lovers from as far
away as Los Angeles and as close
as East Valley Road park in front of
Richies Barber Shop at the bottom of
Middle Road on Coast Village Road
going west to show off and discuss
their prized possessions, automotive
trends and other subjects. Ferraris,
Lamborghinis and Corvettes prevail,
but there are plenty other autos to
admire.
When: 8 am to 10 am (or so)
Where: 1187 Coast Village Road
Info: sbcarscoffee@gmail.com MJ
to preserving, protecting, and enhancing
the semi-rural residential character of
Montecito
When: 4 pm
Where: Montecito Hall,
THURSDAY JANUARY 12
MERRAG Meeting and Training
Network of trained volunteers that
work and/or live in the Montecito
area prepare to respond to community
disaster during critical first 72 hours
following an event. The mutual self-
help organization serves Montecitos
residents with the guidance and
support of the Montecito Fire,
Water and Sanitary Districts. This
month: flooding and winter weather
preparedness.
When: 10 am
Where: Montecito Fire Station,
595 San Ysidro Road
Info: Geri, 969-2537
ONGOING
MONDAYS AND TUESDAYS
Art Classes
Beginning and advanced, all ages and
by appt, just call
Where: Portico Gallery,
1235 Coast Village Road
Info: 695-8850
TUESDAYS AND THURSDAYS
Adventuresome Aging
Where: 89 Eucalyptus Lane
Info: 969-0859; ask for Susan
WEDNESDAYS THRU SATURDAYS
Live Entertainment at Cava
Where: Cava, 1212 Coast Village Road
SATURDAY DECEMBER 31
NYE Pops Concert
The Santa Barbara Symphony invites the
community to ring in the New Year with
the New Years Eve Pops Concert. Special
guest conductor Robert Bernhardt will
energize this joyous concert celebration
with the Santa Barbara Symphony as
they perform toe-tapping favorites from
Broadway to the Classics.
The evening will also feature award-winning
soprano, Mela Dailey. Party hats and
noisemakers will be available for all. Come
celebrate the last night of 2011 with the
Santa Barbara Symphonys New Years Eve
Pops Concert its always a sell-out!
When: 8:30 pm
Where: Granada Theatre,
1214 State Street
Cost: $35 to $100
Tickets: 898-9386

FRIDAY JANUARY 6
Open House
Montecito YMCA holds open house
weekend for prospective members to try
out the facilities
When: January 6 through January 9
(If you have a Montecito event, or an event that concerns Montecito, please e-mail kelly@montecitojournal.net
or call (805) 565-1860)
Community Calendar
by Kelly Mahan
Montecito Tide Chart
Day Low Hgt High Hgt Low Hgt High Hgt Low Hgt
Thurs, Dec 29 1:07 AM 4.2 6:24 AM 2.4 12:07 PM 4.4 07:00 PM 0.4
Fri, Dec 30 1:55 AM 4.2 7:40 AM 2.4 01:02 PM 3.7 07:40 PM 1
Sat, Dec 31 2:45 AM 4.3 9:15 AM 2.3 02:22 PM 3 08:23 PM 1.6
Sun, Jan 1 3:40 AM 4.5 10:54 AM 1.9 04:20 PM 2.7 09:19 PM 2
Mon, Jan 2 4:30 AM 4.7 12:02 PM 1.4 06:06 PM 2.7 010:19 PM 2.3
Tues, Jan 3 5:16 AM 4.9 12:49 PM 0.7 07:14 PM 2.9 011:16 PM 2.4
Wed, Jan 4 5:57 AM 5.2 01:26 PM 0.3 07:59 PM 3.1
Thurs, Jan 5 12:06 AM 2.5 6:34 AM 5.4 01:59 PM -0.1 08:33 PM 3.3
Fri, Jan 6 12:48 AM 2.4 7:10 AM 5.7 02:30 PM -0.5 09:03 PM 3.5

SATURDAY DECEMBER 31
New Years Eve Eateries
Restaurants in Montecito are preparing specials
for the big night, but make sure you have
reservations!
Bella Vista at the Biltmore, 1260 Channel Drive,
969-2261, appetizers, fve-course prix-fxe menu
with champagne toast and live band, $250
Stonehouse and Plow and Angel, 900 San
Ysidro Lane, 565-1724, four-course menu, two
seatings, $165, $220 with wine pairings
Cava, 1212 Coast Village Road, 969-8500,
prix-fxe dinner with champagne and live music,
prices vary
Stella Mares, 50 Los Patos Way, four-course
prix-fxe menu; call for price at 969-6705
Luckys, 1270 Coast Village Road, 565-7540,
reservations required
Montecito Wine Bistro, 516 San Ysidro Road,
969-7520, Sparkling Wine Flights featuring Cristal are $15 per person; normal
menu will be served
WEDNESDAY JANUARY 11
San Ysidro Pathway
Opening
Local community
leaders, neighbors, and
Montecito Union students,
parents, teachers, and
administrators will
formally celebrate the
new safe route to school
pathway on San Ysidro
Road
When: 8 am to 9 am
Where: 385 San Ysidro
Road
Where: 591 Santa Rosa Lane
Info: 898-YMCA
SUNDAY JANUARY 8
Laguna Blanca Open House
Prospective students and parents are
invited to tour the lower campus of
Laguna Blanca school for grades K-4
When: 1 pm to 3 pm
Where: 260 San Ysidro Road
Contact: kromanov@lagunablanca.org
MONDAY JANUARY 9
MBAR Meeting
Montecito Board of Architectural Review
seeks to ensure that new projects are
harmonious with the unique physical
characteristics and character of Montecito
When: 3 pm
Where: Country Engineering Building,
Planning Commission Hearing Room,
123 E. Anapamu
TUESDAY JANUARY 10
Montecito Association Annual
Meeting
The Montecito Association is committed
Building
Peace of
Mind
Building
Peace of
Mind
Building
Peace of
Mind
Building
Peace of
Mind
Building
Peace of
Mind
Building
Peace of
Mind
Building
Peace of
Mind
Building
Peace of
Mind
Building
Peace of
Mind
Building
Peace of
Mind
Building
Peace of
Mind
Awa r d Wi n n i n g B u i l d e r s S i n c e 1 9 8 6
GIFFIN & CRANE
GE NE R A L C ONT R A C T OR S , I NC
Vi si t Our Websi te
www. Gi ffi nAndCrane.com
Phone (805) 966-6401 License 611341
gcr03785_MJ_2011_52weeks_FNL2.indd 3 2/22/11 3:17 PM
May your
holidays be
merry &
bright!
Reservations
805-968-0100
rsvp@bacararesort.com
New Years Day
On New Years Day enjoy
custom Bloody Marys and
football in the Bacara Bar,
with happy hour pricing
from 12 6pm.
New Years Eve
Bacara Bash
Bring on 2012 with dinner at
Mir or The Bistro. Later, join
us in the Rotunda for a festive
Bacara Bash from 8pm 1am.
Balloon drop and bubbly
at midnight!
Howling at the Moon
I was up at 3 am on a Saturday
morning to watch this lunar
eclipse. This one had to be better than
the one last year, which was blocked
by rain and clouds. So I was hoping
for clear skies. At 5:15, I drove up to
the Mission. Everything was silent. As
luck would have it I was the only
person out on that big lawn. That
lasted about five minutes. From then
on I kept hearing more people arrive,
although I couldnt see anyone. At
the same time, the show was per-
fect. Heres a few photos from Friday
evening moon rise and sunset. Then
the eclipse, from the Mission early
Saturday morning.
Daniel Seibert
Montecito
LETTERS (Continued from page 9)
Sunset on the eve-
ning of the lunar
eclipse brought
forth an eerie mix
of fireball red and
smoky black (photo
by Dan Seibert)
The scarlet sun is reflected on the moon behind
the mission on the evening of the lunar eclipse
(photo by Dan Seibert)
T
wo Montecito Rotarians took
part in a humanitarian mission
in the Democratic Republic
of the Congo in central Africa over
the summer. Mark Magid and Dr.
Victoria Bentley from Montecito, as
well as a Rotaract member Courtlin
Stoker, spent four weeks in the
Congo doing various service projects,
including building an open-air market
that has the potential to service 30,000
visitors annually.
We are very proud of the work
we did, Magid told us during a
recent interview. Dr. Bentley, a Rotary
board member, began working in the
Congo two years ago, when she start-
ed a school, Empower Congo Women
(ECW), to help young women learn
to sew and embroider. The need for
a covered market for women to sell
their wares and trinkets became clear,
as the former market in the village
of Mumosho consisted of women sit-
ting in the heavy dust during the
summer or huddling together during
the torrential downpours of the win-
ter. Many of these women are selling
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Montecito Rotarians in the Congo
Village Beat
by Kelly Mahan

Congo liaison
Amani Mataboro,
Montecitos Dr.
Victoria Bentley,
interpreter Rose,
and Montecito
Rotarys Mark
Magid in the Congo
The market opens as a ribbon is cut
sant abarbarast i ckers. com
WHAT'S THE BIG DECAL?
food, and the conditions are not sani-
tary, Magid explained.
With help from local liaison Amani
Mataboro, Montecito Rotary was able
to secure the political leverage and
necessary supplies to build the 125-ft
by 42-ft market. The $23,000 price tag
was raised by the Montecito Rotary, as
well as other Rotary clubs. The mar-
ket, which holds 150 stalls for sellers,
will be self sustaining, as sellers pay
a small rent to use the facility. Magid
says it could potentially service 30,000
people a year, as it is located in the
center of many small villages. Much
pride should be taken for the work
that took place and for this market,
which is a sustainable structure that
will bring flourishing and hygienic
open-trade and commerce for years to
come, Magid said.
While Magid oversaw the building
of the market, Dr. Bentley was busy
in the town of Bukavu, working at
ECW. During her trip, 20 women and
10 girls graduated from the school.
Stoker, a young American on a vol-
unteer mission, joined the Montecito
Rotarians for two weeks of the stay,
teaching English classes to African
children.
Montecito Rotary, of which Magid
is the head of the International
Committee, is involved in other
humanitarian projects in the Congo.
While there this past summer, Magid
was able to check up on other projects,
including visiting the site of a new
agriculture farm that is being used
to raise seeds into seedlings, which
then get distributed to local women
to plant their own vegetable gardens.
This helps them eliminate the need to
pay for vegetables. The seeds, shov-
els, and watering canisters used in
the farm were paid for by Montecito
Rotary grants.
Also, Magid explained, We vis-
ited the site of a non-profit spon-
sored Sewing Center in Mumosho,
where Montecito Rotary Grant funds
have helped to purchase embroidery
machines, he said. These machines
give the women an opportunity to
provide a higher quality of clothing,
therefore putting themselves in a
strong position to be successful.
Magid says he left Mumosho feeling
great about the Rotarys accomplish-
ments. The people there are extreme-
ly grateful and proud of their new
market, he said.
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Before: local women would sell their vegetables and wares in dusty conditions After: a new open-air covered market allows sellers to get out of the elements
VILLAGE BEAT Page 244
do or see plus being able to socialize.
Tony Parham gave kudos to the
Center because when she came to
care for her aunt, she knew no one.
The Center made them feel welcome.
Her aunts little Maltese dog Missy
frequently visits the members and will
soon be a therapy dog.
There to help cut the ribbon was
Goletas mayor and vice president
of the Friendship Center board,
Roger Aceves, 2
nd
District County
Supervisor Janet Wolf, Friendship
Center board president Marty
Moore, Reverend Erika Hewitt,
President of Live Oaks board of
trustees Carrie Topliffe, and Goleta
council member and former mayor
Margaret Connell.
The committee that made this
event happen was Kathy Marden,
Melissa Alvarado, Karolyn Hanna
and Sue Adams. Marty and Heidi
want the community to know that
now that there is a new facility in
Goleta, it has opened up space for
more attendees in Montecito and
Goleta, and perhaps even those liv-
ing in Carpinteria. No one is turned
away due to lack of funds. Call
969-0859 if you know someone that
would benefit from the Friendship
Center.
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Instantly! If you have an
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call Lynda at 969-6164.
Seen Around Town
by Lynda Millner
Friendship Center Ribbon-Cutting
T
he Friendship Center in
Montecito has opened an
additional facility in Goleta
and there was an open house and a
ribbon-cutting to celebrate the new
digs. The new building is located just
north of Cathedral Oaks on Fairview
and is shared with the Live Oak
Congregation, much as they do in
Montecito with All Saints By-The-Sea.
Wine, tapas and a harpist added
to the ambience. Executive Director
Heidi Holly told the group, The
real heroes of the Friendship Center
are the family caregivers. The num-
ber one priority of the elderly is to
remain at home as long as possible.
That is our purpose. The Friendship
Center gives the caregiver a respite.
The Center will pick up your loved
one and keep them all day in a healthy
surrounding with interesting things to
Margaret Connell, Heidi Holly, Carrie Topliffe, Roger Aceves, Marty Moore, Reverend Erika Hewitt and
Janet Wolf all helping cut the ribbon at the new Goleta Friendship Center
The Friendship Center Goleta committee for the ribbon cutting ceremony, Kathy Marden, Melissa
Alvarado and Karolyn Hanna
Toni Parham with her aunts dog Missy who will
soon become a therapy dog at the ribbon cut-
ting party for the Friendship Center in Goleta
Executive Director of Friendship Center Heidi Holly with Goleta mayor Roger Aceves and board presi-
dent Marty Moore at the new location
29 December 2011 5 January 2012 MONTECITO JOURNAL 15 Action may not always bring happiness, but there is no happiness without action Benjamin Disraeli
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SEEN Page 164
Mental Health Matters
The Mental Health Association
(MHA) in Santa Barbara County
packed the El Paseo Restaurant with
supporters for their fundraiser lun-
cheon. Board President Nancy Chase
welcomed all and showed us slides of
the Mental Health Arts Festival. The
artists were all mentally challenged
and they loved the opportunity to
shine with their art.
As lunch was served, the Executive
Director Annmarie Cameron told of
the three areas of the MHAs programs.
The first is recovery, where the ill need
a safe place to live, a job and rela-
tionships. One of these places where
MHA can be very proud is the 70-unit
Garden street apartments for the men-
tally ill and low income. I was at the
opening and the facilities are lovely.
My table Captain Shandra Campbell
told me, My daughter has a place
there and she loves it. Especially the
fellowship club on the main floor.
There they can socialize as well as take
all sorts of classes.
The second program is education
so the stigma of mental illness can
be broken. There is a 6
th
-grade pro-
gram that is presently in 14 schools
where 500 kids each year learn that
mental health matters. As Karlise
L. (age 11) from Monte Vista School
says, It made me realize that people
with mental health disorders deserve
respect. And Kelsey W explains, It
made me think. I will always make
sure that I treat people with disorders
like everyone else and I wont even
think about them being different.
The third program is recreation and
education. Research indicates that one
in four families is affected by mental
health problems and they are more
common than cancer or heart disease.
Ramona Winner, who is a parent
of an MHA client, shared the tearful
story of her son who began having
mental health issues as a teen. He
couldnt stand to be touched, so she
couldnt even hug him. Fortunately
they met with MHA. Hes now 25 and
with medication is able to keep the
negative voices away.
Lynn Sarko, an MHA volunteer,
introduced the Mental Wellness
Giving Society. He explained, Our
funds were cut by fifty percent in 2009
so there is more need than ever for
public support. Table captains col-
lected many envelopes with signed
pledge cards inside.
Toni Amorteguy, Laurie Ashton,
Tracy Beard, Annmarie Cameron,
Nancy Chase, Patricia Collins,
George Kaufmann, Ann Lippincott
and Lynn Sarko put the event togeth-
er. They want people to know MHAs
mantra is Creating Hope Through
Understanding.
Holiday Celebration
Antioch University Santa Barbara
(AUSB) took over the University Club
so that alumni and friends could cele-
brate, engage and reunite. The affable
president Nancy Leffert, PhD greeted
everyone. When we commented on
the good wine, she grinned broadly
and said, My son, Jeremy, made that.
Board president of the Mental Health Association Nancy Chase with executive director Annmarie
Cameron and Dr. Ann Lippincott at the fundraiser luncheon
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HOLIDAY SALE HOLIDAY SALE
Hes a winemaker for Hearst Ranch
Winery. I was surprised to learn that
there is a tasting room across from the
castle in the Sebastian store.
Some of the folks enjoying Jeremys
wine were Joe Medjuck, John and
Mary Romo, Deborah Schwartz,
Mary Ellen Tiffany (Antioch trustee),
Steve Caputo and Allan Ghitterman.
Nancy spoke briefly to the guests,
explaining, We just moved into our
new building at 602 Anacapa Street in
October. The new campus dedication
will be on March 15, 2012. There is a
new vitality and we got a matching
grant of $500,000. Every dollar given
will be doubled into one million dol-
lars. The three-story, 28,000 square-
foot campus also has large patios and
courtyards with space for everyone.
Antioch has an interesting histori-
cal snapshot. Horace Mann, its first
president, founded it in Ohio in 1852.
The learning model blended practi-
cal work experience with classroom
learning. It was the first college in the
United States to grant a tenured pro-
fessorship to a woman and the first to
offer the same curriculum to male and
female students. It was one of the first
coeducational colleges and one of the
first white colleges to eliminate race
as an admission requirement, even
recruiting black students.
There are five campuses spread
across the United States. In addition,
there are 5,000 online adult students.
AUSB has 4,000 alumni and there are
30,000 cumulative AU grads. For more
information, call 962-8179 ext. 5176
or check out www.antiochsb.edu/sup
port. MJ
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(805) 969-5939
www.MontecitoVino.com
965-5555
www.vnhcsb.org
The Gift of Caring
Consider the gift of in-home
Personal Care Services
for the holidays.

Please call for a free
in-home assessment or to
inquire about a gift voucher.
Buyers of Estate
Jewelry & Fine Watches
Diamonds, Gold,
Platinum and Sterling
SEEN (Continued from page 15)
Antioch University Santa Barbara chair of the board Victoria Riskin, President Nancy Leffert, PhD and
trustee Bob Kupiec, who was the architect of the new campus renovation
Hannah Beth Jackson and acting superintendent-president of Santa Barbara City College, Jack
Friedlander, PhD at the Antioch Christmas party
B
ut how is Santa going to fnd
us, Daddy?
It was a reasonable question
given the circumstances.
Both girls looked up at me sheepish-
ly, with a certain innocent desperation
that perhaps only exists in little girls
wearing pajamas and getting ready
for bed. Sort of sad puppy-dog meets
Cindy Lou Who. I had to think fast.
Well well send him a letter. Just
like we would back in California.
But Daddy, Lily carefully consid-
ered, you keep saying we are in the
middle of the jungle in Thailand.
(Damn that homeschooling.) How
will Santa get our letter?
I was a litigator for some fairly
sophisticated clients for a good num-
ber of years, effectively trained to
think clearly and remain calm on my
feet while under pressure. But wed
been traveling for six months and I
was emphatically not in what you
might have called top form.
So I panicked.
Dont worry you guys, I stam-
mered, Mommy and I will figure
something out.
Lily was right, of course. Wed been
Meet our teachers, students,
school leadership, and members of our
Board of Trustees.
Four year Academic and College Counseling
program
College matriculation rates (100% of
students moving on to college studies since
2002)
12:1 student teacher ratio/average class
size is 20
35 full time faculty; 5 with Ph.D.s
10 AP courses; 16 Varsity sports
B
ishop
D
iego
garcia
High School
4000 La Colina Rd., Santa Barbara, CA 93110 805.967.1266 www.bishopdiego.org
2010 NatioNal Merit Scholar FiNaliSt FroNtier league chaMpioNS/ciF SeMi-FiNaliStS - Football 2011 FroNtier league chaMpioNS /ciF FiNaliStS - boyS
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Competitive in the classroom Competitive on the field
B I S HO P D I E G O HI G H S C HO O L
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Leaving It
All Behind
A Christmas Story
by Matt Mazza
Lily and Kate find a buffalo skull on a hike on
the banks of the Lang River in the middle of the
jungle near the Thai-Burma border
Matt was a lawyer up until June 2011, when he closed up shop and left
Montecito with his wife and kids to travel around the world. Read his (and his
family's) full story in the newest edition of the Montecito Journal (glossy edition), on newsstands now.
LEAVING Page 354
that doesnt exist and then deliver
something that is meaningful, you
can create a big business. CNBC did
it. We think we can do it with OWN.
Stay tuned...
Romance Rekindling
Theyve hardly been together in
recent months, kept apart by busy
work schedules, leading to much
speculation about the state of their
marriage.
But Santa Barbara warbler Katy
Perry and British comedian Russell
Brand are planning a romantic trip
back to where they tied the knot in a
bid to spice up their relationship.
The tony twosome are said to be
returning to India, where they were
married more than a year ago.
Brand, who has been working on
back-to-back film projects since the
summer, has reportedly booked a hol-
iday to the Aman New Delhi Hotel
in the New Year to get their marriage
back on track.
Meanwhile, Katy has been traveling
around the globe on her California
Dreams tour.
Watch this space...
Busted Moves
Santa Barbara Revels Bavarian
Celebration of the Winter Solstice at
the Lobero had an unexpected addi-
tion to the colorful cast when yours
truly was chosen from the audience,
along with two other hapless vic-
tims, to try our hands at Schuhplattler
dancing.
Literally meaning shoeslapper,
dancers, dressed in their lederhosen,
rhythmically slap their thighs, knees
and shoes to music in three quarter
time.
After the briefest of demonstrations,
we were left to our own devices to
thoroughly embarrass ourselves in
front of a much amused audience.
For our efforts, St. Nicholas, wicked-
ly played by UCSB drama professor,
Simon Williams, presented us with
lumps of coal, a souvenir to treasure.
This was the fourth annual event
under founder and producer Susan
Keller, with Ken Ryals as the very
capable music director and Maggie
Mixsell running the stage.
One of the highlights is the singing
of The Twelve Days of Christmas,
with a full cast of young audience
members acting out the various char-
acters, under the amusing direction of
Ryals.
Great fun, but I feel, after my decid-
edly feeble efforts on stage, Dancing
with the Stars wont be calling me any
time soon!..
Attitude Reconstruction
It took 21 years for Montecito fam-
ily therapist Jude Bijou to write her
first book Attitude Reconstruction.
Jude, whose late father was a pio-
neering behavioral child psycholo-
gist at universities in Washington,
Arizona and Illinois, says it took so
long because I wanted to make an
order of things.
I went to India in 1972 to study
meditation and worked with transcen-
dental meditation with the Maharishi,
who famously worked with the
Beatles, in France and Switzerland in
the seventies. I also visited an ash-
ram in the 1990s, but I didnt find
the answers I needed. Meditating cer-
tainly helped as I got glimpses of
myself... I certainly had pure good
experiences.
Jude, who threw a small launch
bash at Tecolote, the bustling biblio-
phile bastion in the Upper Village,
says her 320-page tome is a guide to
going from sadness, anger and fear
to joy, love and peace in less than five
minutes.
A quick fix, indeed...
Royally Close Quarters
Christmas would appear to
have been decidedly cramped for
Queen Elizabeth and her family at
Sandringham House, her Majestys
stately pile in Norfolk in the east of
England.
The 20,000 acre estate was bought
by Queen Victoria for her son, the
future King Edward VII, and the mon-
arch traditionally spends Yuletide and
the New Year there.
With a record 27 royals staying there
this year, one of the biggest gather-
ings of the Royal Family in decades,
it caused a major headache for staff at
the Jacobean-style mansion, with roy-
als at the lower end of the pecking
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MISCELLANy Page 284
MISCELLANy (Continued from page 7)
guidance and often drops by to see
how Im doing when hes not at Caf
Del Sol, adds Ivan, who graduated
from San Marcos High School and
attended City College.
The perfect pairing...
Stick With Her
Despite disappointing ratings and
increased costs, Oprah Winfreys
year-old eponymous cable chan-
nel, OWN, still has the backing of
Discovery Communications honcho,
David Zaslav, who is asking viewers
to give it time to establish its footing.
My job, Oprahs job, is to create a
meaningful audience for OWN over
the next two years, he told a media
conference in New York. Thats what
you should watch for and I think
were on our way.
Discovery launched OWN last
January amid much fanfare, but
despite a big ratings gain in its first
week it averaged 505,000 viewers
viewing figures since then have been a
ratings disappointment.
In November, according to Nielsen
Media Research, prime-time total
viewers were down 16 percent from
240,000 to 202,000, and women 25-54
declined three percent from 78,000 to
76,000. Total day viewers were down
22 percent from 144,000 to 113,000 and
women 25-54 were off eight percent
from 48,000 to 44,000.
The network has also been costly.
Discovery committed $189 million in
funding for the network at its launch,
but as of September, its investment in
OWN had ballooned to $254 million,
according to financial statements.
Zaslav says advertisers remain sup-
portive of Oprah and her network.
Were just getting going, he says.
Theyre excited about the mission. If
you can create a network in a niche
Alfredo Arroyo with his restaurateur son, Ivan,
outside the Las Aves Caf
Oprahs
cable TV
channel gets
full back-
ing from
Discovery
Katy Perry and Russell Brand to rekindle romance
on India trip
Jude Bijous
21 year book
project
point of fracture.
Other possible uses of the Osteoprobe
include better and easier diagnosis of
soft tissue pathologies. Sometimes, for
example, when a surgeon wants to do a
knee surgery and theres some scarring
from a previous injury or surgery, the
surgeon would like some way to mea-
sure the properties of the scar so theyd
know if this was something that would
heal or whether they have to call in a
plastic surgeon to do a skin graft.
In breast cancer, of course, the tissue
stiffens, you look for bumps; you have
hardening of the arteries, plaques that
build up in various places in the body,
and you have the whole problem of car-
tilage going bad. Theres a lot of tissue
mechanical properties Hansma sug-
gests, that would be worth measuring
in addition to bone material strength, so
were starting to look at some of those.
Later, Dr. Hansma makes his pitch
to the small group assembled: Im an inventor; I like to be in the lab, he says
somewhat apologetically, but right now what with the Mayo Clinic wanting
an instrument and then in Europe, Adolfo Perez wants to do a ten-center eight-
country study; we need to have ten instruments that are all the same and wed
like to have a made-in-a-standardized-manufacturing facility so that we could
get the European equivalent of FDA approval of these instruments.
The company needs the money to finance the construction of a batch of
instruments made in a certified facility and also to make an important fix to
the BioDent instrument before they make any more of them. The demand is
huge, says Hansma.
In case someone wants to contribute to this effort, they should contact:
activelifescientific.com, or call Davis Brimer at: 805-624-5633. MJ
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EDITORIAL (Continued from page 5)
Dr. Paul Hansma demonstrates the use of his lat-
est invention, the Osteoprobe during an informal
gathering at the home of Lad Handelman
bone community, according to Dr. Hansma came up to him and said he too
believed that bone material properties were very important for fracture resis-
tance, but that those properties were clinically irrelevant.
Hansma disagreed, but Perez explained that since there was no way to mea-
sure bone material properties in a living human, there was no way to diagnose
a patient, consequently no way to develop a course of treatment.
Currently, doctors measure the extent of osteoporosis by looking for bone
loss. Thats just half the problem; the other half of the problem, Hansma sug-
gests, may be this bone material property. He figured it was not only a ques-
tion of how much bone one has, but also how good the material properties of the
bone are. Right now, the medical profession is only able to deal with bone loss.
All of the diagnoses, all the therapy, is focused on how to recreate bone mass.
Until now, Dr. Hansma says, theres been no way to measure its material
properties, whether the bone is supple or brittle.
He took it as a challenge to develop such an instrument, because, he says, I
like to build instruments. Twenty-two prototypes later, he has one. It took a
couple of years trying to think about how you would measure the bone mate-
rial properties inside a human. You cant cut out test bits and mount them in
your test apparatus, he says, half-jokingly. But then, an idea came to me and
started me on a path.
That path began with a trip to a supermarket where he bought two soup
bones. I baked one in the oven to degrade the organic molecules so that it
would be more easily fractured. I verified that it was; then I said, okay, Ive
got good bone, bad bone. Now, what could I do to distinguish good bone from
bad bone that would be possible in a patient? The first thing that worked was
an automatic center punch. They work in creating a pilot hole. You press down
and they go pop, and make a little indent. At any rate, what I noticed was
that it would make a bigger indent in the bone that was more easily fractured.
Which makes sense, because the tip went in further. And then, I thought, well
we couldnt do that because you couldnt see the indent you made anyway.
Eventually, Dr. Hansma determined that if he had a hypodermic needle that
went down through the skin and if the outside of the needle rested on the sur-
face of the bone, the probe could go down the center of it. Then, the probe could
make a little indent and could measure how far into the bone he was going,
creating a reference point indentation.
The Osteoprobe
That ended up working very well. In clinical trials, it turned out it could dis-
tinguish between the bone of patients who have bone fractures and the bone of
age-matched patients who did not have fractures but were in hospital for other
reasons.
Dr. Hansma is an old-school inventor-researcher, and so had the test done
to himself about a hundred times by now. Ive been tested with four different
instruments along the way. The first one we made worked, he explains, but
it was hard for physicians to use. It had to be kept stationary for ten seconds
over the patients leg. You cant hand-hold it, you needed to have a special arm
coming across it, so you have to wheel a pretty big thing into the patients room
and set up this arm to lift down this scary-looking thing with a needle at the
end of it. It was just cumbersome.
Additionally, the team wanted to examine horses bones, and horses wont
stand still.
They went back to the drawing board and came up with a new instrument
called an Osteoprobe that takes just one-thousandth of a second for the mea-
surement, so nobody has to stay still.
The earlier instrument is called the Bio Dent, suitable for small animal stud-
ies; the Osteoprobe needs a bigger bone, such as that for a human.
Word is getting out. The Mayo Clinic, for example, wants one to help deter-
mine if the material strength of the bones of people with diabetes is worse than
the bones of people without diabetes, and if thats why diabetics get so many
more bone fractures.
In Norway, researcher Erik Erickson wants to see if poor bone material
strength is the reason why Norwegians have twice the fracture rate of Spaniards
(and Americans), even though they have the same bone mineral density.
Several hundred people have been tested in Norway, in Barcelona, and in
Oregon. The Osteoprobe was only invented last year. To have it going into
clinical trials one year later is pretty amazing, but it shows the need for this
instrument, observes Dr. Hansma.
Animal studies are taking place to try to understand how to improve bone
material strength. Horses are the biggest example of that. People would like to
sell supplements to improve the bone strength of horses, and until now, theres
been no way of knowing if those supplements work; the only way of determin-
ing that after the fact was fractures. Now, youll be able to feed them various
things and measure them again and see if it works, and you dont have the end
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W
hat does a busy mom and
wife who likes to cook do
with her free time when
(and if) she has some? If she were Katie
Koonce, she might write a blog about
her life as a mother and highlight her
favorite recipes. Katie, a self-professed
foodie, initially posted all her recipes
on her family blog, and then noticed
they were being viewed by many
others and not just family members.
To maintain the privacy of her
family, she launched Epicureanmom.
com, a public blog to highlight her
love of food, along with her love of
photography and most importantly,
her love of motherhood.
Katie, along with her sister, Sara
Dorman, was born and raised in
Santa Barbara and attended Dos
Pueblos High School. Their father,
Dr. John Dorman, was an ER sur-
geon and currently operates the Test
America Medical Center in Santa
Barbara. Although my fathers
vocation was in medicine, his avo-
cation, which also turned into a
peripheral vocation, was photogra-
phy. I learned my photography skills
from my father. I photograph all my
food on my blog, enthused Katie.
She learned how to cook by being
her moms helper in the kitchen. On
some days her mother would come
home to dozens of cookies, all made
by a young Katie.
Katie met and married her husband,
LifeStyle
Meet The Epicurean Mom
Lilly resides in Montecito with her husband, Read, daughter Teddy,
and furry, four-legged companion, Moxie
by Lilly Tam Cronin
Dr. Bill Koonce, an internist, and
the couple now have two daughters:
Kyla, five years old, and Lola, fifteen
months old.
Katie reflects that becoming a moth-
er has forced her to cook more health-
ful foods. We grow food in our gar-
den and my kids can see the process
of food coming from our garden onto
their plate. It also makes them want
to eat the food too, she adds. If they
couldnt grow it, she and her husband
have been known to actually scat-
ter fruit for their daughters to find.
Katies first experiences in the kitchen
with her mother were so enjoyable
that her desire is to give her daugh-
ters the same sense of enjoyment by
involving them in the cooking process.
Katies
Macaroni & Cheese
Katie puts extra effort into prepar-
ing healthy meals for her family using
organic and local fruits and vegetables.
But what about the less-healthy com-
fort foods? She understands that kids
will want macaroni and cheese. Rather
than making it from a box, however,
she writes in her blog how to make it
more healthful by using fresh cheese,
crisped breadcrumbs and baking it
all in a casserole dish. Its actually as
easy as making it from a box, but defi-
nitely better for you and much tastier,
says Katie. Macaroni and cheese,
she adds, is one of those dishes that
doesnt need exact measurements. I
just eyeball the ingredients and add
or delete as preferred. The handful of
breadcrumbs makes it more hearty and
gives it texture; bake it in the oven for
about twenty minutes at three-hun-
dred and twenty-five degrees and you
get a grownup macaroni and cheese
that kids will devour too.
Desserts are Katies favorite dishes
to make and photograph. Her family
and friends have all benefited from her
enthusiastic experimenting of dessert
recipes. A blog favorite has been her
adaptation of Chef Tyler Florence of
Food Networks Blueberry Cheesecake
Lemon bars. Its main ingredients were
her familys favorite fruits, but it was
too complicated to make. She decided
to tweak it and simplify it so it would
suit moms who want to make a quick
and easy dessert. I take advantage of
Santa Barbaras local fresh fruit avail-
ability and use fresh organic blueber-
ries. I usually get most of my fresh
fruit and vegetables from Lazy Acres,
explains Katie.
As she continues to update
Epicureanmom.com, Katie is also in
the middle of designing and rebuild-
ing their home that was burned down
by the Jesusita Fire. They have moved
close to a dozen times since the fire.
Despite the many moves and the vari-
ety of kitchens, she still finds the time
and motivation to make healthful and
appetizing meals for her family and
continues to blog about it.
You will find on her blog that her
recipes are categorized by: small
bites, salads, soups, entres, desserts,
refreshments and wine. With easy-to-
read menus and photographs of the
finished product, readers can grab the
ingredients the same day as postings.
Epicurean Moms Lemon
Blueberry Cheesecake bars
Butter, for greasing
2 tablespoons sugar
1/8 tablespoon ground cinnamon
9 graham crackers
1/2 stick unsalted butter, melted

For the Filling:
16 ounces cream cheese, room tem-
perature
2 eggs
2 lemons, zested and juiced
cup sugar
1 cups fresh blueberries

Directions:
For the Base:
Preheat oven to 325 degrees. Grease
the bottom of a 9 by 9-inch baking
pan with butter. Then place parch-
ment paper over the top, pressing
down at the corners. In a food pro-
cessor, process the sugar, cinnamon
and graham crackers until you have
the consistency of breadcrumbs.
Add the melted butter and pulse a
couple of times to fully incorporate.
Pour into the lined baking pan and
firmly pat down with the bottom of
a glass. Bake for about 12 minutes,
or until set.

For the filling:
Add cream cheese, eggs, lemon
zest, lemon juice, and sugar to the
food processor and pulse until well
combined. It should have a smooth
consistency. Pour onto the cooked
graham cracker base and then sprin-
kle with blueberries. They will sink
slightly but should be half exposed.
Bake in the oven for 35-45 minutes, or
until the center only slightly jiggles.
Remove from the oven and cool com-
pletely before refrigerating for at least
3 hours. Once set, remove from pan
using the parchment lining and slice
into 10 rectangular bars. MJ
Katie Koonce, the Epicurean Mom, combines her
love of food and family in her blog, which high-
lights healthy recipes and colorful photos
The end
result:
Epicurean
Moms
lemon
blueberry
cheesecake
bars
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Dont Bury Their Memory
story by Lynn P. Kirst
TRAIL TALK
A museum and
travel professional,
community volun-
teer, and lifelong
equestrienne,
Lynn Kirst is a
fourth-generation Californian who grew up
in Montecito; she can often be found riding
or hiking the local trails
Dont bury me in this prairie
Take me where the cement grows
Lets move down to some big town
Where they love a gal by the cut o her
clothes
And Ill stand out
In buttons and bows*
Buttons and Bows, a popular tune

with music by Jay Livingston and
lyrics by Jay Evans, was sung by Bob
Hope (1903-2003) in the 1947 film
Paleface, also starring Jane Russell.
It won the Academy Award that year
for Best Song. It was again used in the
sequel, Son of Paleface, when Jane
Russell and Roy Rogers sang it, with
comic interjections by Bob Hope.
Its that time of year again, one

that comes around all too soon. It has
become my tradition to make the last
Trail Talk column of the calendar
year a roundup of remembrance for
folks who left the trail over the last
twelve months. Inclusion in this col-
umn is for those who were in some
way tied to the world whose qualities
I espouse: either through horses or
trails or simply because they influ-
enced those interested in the Western
way of life. No doubt this list is incom-
plete, but the following people deserve
our special remembrance.
James Arness (1923-2011)
Although his name was James
Auerness when he was born in
Minneapolis, Minnesota, most people
remember him as Marshall Matt Dillon
on the long-running television series
Gunsmoke. The role was initially
offered to John Wayne (1907-1979), but
Wayne rejected it and recommended
Arness instead, supposedly telling his
friend, Go ahead and take it, Jim.
Youre too big for pictures. Guys like
Gregory Peck and I dont want a big
lug like you towering over us.
Arness (who changed the spelling
natural causes, leaving a wife, two
sons and six grandchildren.
Clark Beckstead (1948-2011)
Santa Barbaras most popular far-
rier, Clark Beckstead, died suddenly
at the age of 63 doing what he liked
best. It was a Monday March 14
and Clark was just starting to shoe
his fourth horse of the morning when
he collapsed and died, ostensibly of a
heart attack. Clarks sudden death was
a terrible shock to the Santa Barbara
horse community, where he had many
friends and clients.
Clark Beckstead was born on a hay
and dairy farm in Riverton, Utah, the
second of eight children. He achieved
the rank of Eagle Scout and was a
member of Future Farmers of America,
before enlisting in the U.S. Navy and
completing a tour of duty aboard the
U.S.S. Ajax during the Vietnam War.
After attending Oklahomas Farrier
College, he established his horseshoe-
ing business in Santa Barbara. Over
the course of 35 years, Clark gained a
reputation as being a particularly gift-
ed farrier, helping many horses with
specialized foot and leg problems. He
was a contributor to the book enti-
tled Equine Podiatry, and served
as a farrier for the Japanese Olympic
equestrian team in 1996 and 1997.
Clark will always be remembered
as one of the founders of Equine Evac,
after helping to rescue dozens of
horses during Santa Barbaras Painted
Cave Fire in 1990, as well as a faithful
supporter of Old Spanish Days Fiesta
Rodeo and the Santa Barbara Riding
Club. His wife, Karen, and three chil-
dren survive him.
Jo Couch (1942-2011)
Another person who died doing
what she loved best was Jo Couch,
who left this world while riding her
horse at home on her own ranch in
Los Alamos. Jos many friends (myself
included) are still mentally scolding
her for heading out on a trail ride on
January 25 without her cell phone in
her pocket, which would have pre-
vented a simple accident from turning
into a fatality.
Jo was a California native, born in
Los Angeles and raised between Palm
Springs and Catalina Island. As smart
as she was beautiful, Jo studied at UC
Berkeley and UCLA, where she also
earned her M.A. in Education. For the
next 24 years, she taught French in the
Beverly Hills school system.
Jo and her husband, Jeff, established
their ranch home in Los Alamos nine
years ago, where they hosted many
friends and trail rides. Jo was an active
member of The Fillies, a local wom-
ens invitational riding group. She
was also a painter, pianist, avid reader
and adventurous outdoorswoman. In
addition to her husband and son, Jo
leaves behind a large extended family
and numerous friends who still miss
her every day.
Hattie Feazelle (1911-2011)
September 11, or 9/11 as its com-
monly referred to, has now taken on
additional significance, as its the date
that Hattie Feazelle went to the great
Fiesta in the Sky. Hatties passing
after a short two-day illness occurred
just a little over a month after she
served as Grand Marshal in the 87th
annual Old Spanish Days Fiesta
Parade. The only centenarian on this
years list, Hattie witnessed amazing
things during the 100 years of her life.
She was already 30 years old when the
Japanese attacked Pearl Harbor!
Hattie, a beloved local horsewoman,
TRAIL TALK Page 304
of his last name to accommodate show
business) was indeed a big lug,
standing 67 in height. His younger
brother, Peter Graves (1926-2010), also
enjoyed a successful television run in
Mission Impossible.
Arness earned a Purple Heart in
World War II when he was wound-
ed in the leg during the invasion of
Anzio, Italy in 1944. After a year in
the hospital, he eventually made his
way to California where he worked
his way into the movies. After small
roles in nearly twenty films, he hit
the jackpot with Gunsmoke. From
1955 to 1975, Marshall Dillon kept
the peace in Dodge City, along with
other memorable characters such as
Miss Kitty (the saloon keeper played
by Amanda Blake) and his deputy,
Chester Goode (played by Dennis
Weaver). Arness died at age 88 from
James Arness, in his Gunsmoke role of Marshal
Matt Dillon
Local farrier Clark Beckstead plying his trade
Hattie Feazelle, who participated in every parade
since 1924, will always be known as the Queen
of Fiesta
Jo Couch,
whose untime-
ly death leaves
a hole in the
hearts of her
many friends
29 December 2011 5 January 2012 MONTECITO JOURNAL 23 A man who has been the indisputable favorite of his mother keeps for life the feeling of a conqueror Sigmund Freud
I
f you use sales fgures as a
standard for making comparisons,
it is fair to claim that a successful
author does not necessarily have an
agreeable, compelling prose style.
The mystery-suspense writer, James
Lee Burke, gives lie to this thesis, but
mystery-suspense writers Michael
Connolly and Patricia Cornwell bear
it out with some regularity.
Back in the reaches of time, when I
was head of the West Coast office of a
major mass market reprint publisher,
I had the opportunity to persuade
another such writer big on story
and sales, only so-so on narrative
style to leave his then publisher in
order to join us. Louis LAmour has
been dead since 1988. Nevertheless,
his works continue to sell in the tens
and hundreds of millions of copies.
In addition to learning LAmours
enormous loyalty to his publisher, I
learned the following: Most writ-
ers, he told me, even those whose
works enjoy brisk sales, begin their
stories too soon.
By this, he meant the need to
explain, supply backstory and moti-
vational data. My subsequent experi-
ences as editor, teacher, and reviewer
well validate LAmours thesis. The
results often produce the kind of
book you will never hear about in
blurb or review, the put-down-able
book.
Unless.
Unless you happen to chance upon
the latest work of Ian Rankin or,
hearing that he has formally parted
with his longtime detective protago-
nist, John Rebus, you were curious to
see where he could possibly go after
having for so long been the standard
to which writers of any genre are
held.
In The Impossible Dead, Ian Rankin
gives us the opportunity to discover
whether there can be life after John
Rebus, if it has any chance at all of
making us want to revisit the streets
of Edinburgh, and if he has in any
way begun to become repetitious or
come apart at the stylistic seams.
Rankin introduced us to Malcolm
Fox, an Edinburgh cop who, were
he with an American police force,
would be considered that extreme
outsider characterized by Internal
Affairs. In The Complaints, his entry
into the even darker world of whos
investigating the investigators,
Rankin gives us another character
whose status and experience reflect
the scars and genomes of contempo-
rary living.
The Impossible Dead begins with an
apparently ho-hum Internal Affairs
Department investigation of dirty
and compromised cops in Kirkcaldy,
a smallish town in Fife, perhaps an
hours drive from Edinburgh.
The term Complaints, was
already outdated. Complaints and
Conduct had been their official title
until recently. Now they were sup-
posed to be Professional Ethics and
Standards. Next year theyd be some-
thing else again: the name Standards
and Values had been mooted, to
nobodys liking. They were The
Complaints, the cops who investi-
gated other cops. Which was why
those other cops were never happy
to see them.
Lets get this out of the way quick-
ly: Rankins characters come off as
persnickety and stubborn as long-
haired cat fur on a dark sweater.
Even the most menial or shadowy
has some outstanding presence and
symbiosis with the others you scarce-
ly find outside of an acting ensemble.
Rankins cops reflect the age, gender,
and culture specifics youd expect to
find and do find anywhere, thus
Nancy Trotter 687-0130 Beginning Bridge
Starting Monday, January 9
th
7:00-9:00pm
10 lessons $12.00 each, using Silverman Text
Gail Steffan 964-4616 Two Over One, Game Forcing
with appropriate conventions
Starting Tuesday, January 17
th
, 10:00-12:00 am
6 lessons $12.00 each
Nancy Trotter 687-0130 Intermediate Bridge
Starting Tuesday, January 10
th
, 1:30-3:30 pm
10 lessons $12.00 each, using Silverman text
Nancy Trotter 687-0130 Intermediate Bridge
Starting Wednesday, January 11
th
, 7:00-9:00 pm
10 lessons $12.00 each, using Silverman text
Workshops
Fran Pangburn 964-8860 On-going throughout the year. $10.00 per session
A good way to practice what you have learned
Mondays 7:00-8:30 pm. Foursomes encouraged.
Gail Steffan 964-4616 Fridays 10:00-11:30, $10.00 per session
No partner necessary
Winter BridgeLessons 2012
Santa Barbara Bridge Center 2255 Las Positas Rd
Shelly Lowenkopf blogs @
www.lowenkopf.com. His
latest book, The Fiction
Lovers Companion, is
due in September.
BOOK TALK
by Shelly Lowenkopf
Leader of the Pack
they impinge upon your awareness
while Malcolm Fox leads his team of
two into all the places they are least
welcomed, most suspected.
One cop in particular, Detective
Paul Carter, has been accused of mis-
conduct. His uncle, Alan Carter, once
on the force but now retired, was
the one to bring charges against his
nephew. Then theres Teresa Collins,
who pressed the charges against Paul
Carter. When Fox and his men go to
interview her: She spun away from
the window. What if I say its all
a lie? I made it up to get him into
bother?
Soon Teresa Collins has a major
meltdown, attempting suicide. Soon
thereafter, Alan Carter, uncle of the
suspected dirty cop and a man Fox
had come to like, is dead of appar-
ent suicide. Both these events are the
equivalent of Yo-Yo Ma essaying a
ukulele concerto. Even among ama-
teurs, suicides in mysteries are never
what they seem. In Rankin narratives,
they are rich, speculative themes.
In fact, all in The impossible Dead
are themes, resonant and search-
ing, seeking resolution. Fox hadnt
encountered too much violence or
tragedy during his years on the force.
A few drunken fights to break up
when hed been in uniform; a couple
of bad murder cases in CID. Part of
the appeal of the Complaints had
been its focus on rules broken rather
than bones, on cops who crossed the
line but were not violent men. Did
that make him a coward? He didnt
think so. Less of a copper? Again, no.
But it was in his nature to avoid con-
frontation, or ensure it didnt well up
in the first place which was why he
felt he had failed with Teresa Collins.
Every moment of his time with her
could have been played differently,
and with better outcome.
Interesting to speculate whether
Rankin could have sold this begin-
ning to The Impossible Dead without
the enormous effect of the 19 Rebus
novels before it. Id vote a resound-
ing yes. Malcolm Fox takes us into
a police station, which is symbolism
enough on its own. He shows us the
immediacy of opposition to inquiry,
which is going on about us on so
many levels throughout the world as
this is written. He presents us with
conspiracy theories, hidden agendas,
paranoia as evangelism, and evan-
gelism as paranoia. He Fox and
his creator are given to thinking in
sentences that require semicolons, of
itself a serious no-no for the copy-
editor of this newspaper and one
literary agent/former editor in Hope
Ranch.
Malcolm Fox and Ian Rankin make
us care; they cause us to turn the
pages of The Impossible Dead slowly,
with deliberation, to make sure we
have not missed a single nuance. MJ
Even among amateurs, suicides in mysteries are
never what they seem. In Rankin narratives, they are
rich, speculative themes.
Ian Rankins most recent thriller, The Impossible
Dead, strays away from his usual protagonist and
instead focuses on Inspector Malcolm Fox from
the Office of Complaints and Conduct
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compiled by Flora Kontilis from information supplied by Santa Barbara County
Sheriffs Department, Carpinteria Division
SHERIFFS
BLOTTER
Theft From Auto on Butterfly Lane
Friday, 9 December, 12:15 pm Deputy DeOrnellas was dispatched to Butterfly
Lane to investigate a burglary report. The deputy contacted the victim, who
reported her that vehicle was broken into the night before. The victim last saw
her vehicle at 6 pm the previous day when she left it locked. She returned to
her vehicle at 10:30 am on December 9 and discovered the drivers side door
was open. The victim noticed that her company gas card and company fleet
card were missing from the vehicle. DeOrnellas dusted the vehicle for prints
and picked up a set from the driver and passenger side doors; the prints were
submitted to a forensics team for processing. A report was taken.
Residential Burglary on Hill Road
Wednesday, 14 December, 9:35 pm Deputy McSkimming was dispatched
to a studio apartment on Hill Road based on report of a burglary. When
McSkimming arrived at the residence, the deputy contacted the victim who
reported several valuable items missing from her home; items include a flat
screen TV, desktop computer, and ladies wrist watch. The victim told the dep-
uty that she left her home at 1:30 pm that day, and returned from work at 9:30
pm when she discovered the burglary. McSkimming observed that the suspect
entered the residence from an open bathroom window. A report was taken.
Public Intoxication and Possession of Cocaine
Saturday, 17 December, 11:50 pm Deputy Bordon was patrolling San Ysidro
Road when a man was seen standing in the northbound lane; Bordon contacted
the man to investigate. When the deputy approached, there was a strong odor
of alcohol coming from the man. Bordon observed that the mans speech was
thick and slurred, and that the man could not stand without swaying from
side to side. Based on the mans signs of public intoxication, Bordon placed
him under arrest. Bordon transported him to Santa Barbara County Jail, where
the Custody Deputy found a small folded piece of paper containing a white
powder in the mans pants pocket. Bordon identified the substance as cocaine.
A report was taken.
Fine Jewelry Stolen in Summerland
Sunday, 18 December, 7:11 pm Deputy McSkimming was dispatched to a resi-
dence on Shelby Street regarding a burglary. Upon arriving at the home, the dep-
uty contacted the victim, who reported several pieces of fine jewelry stolen. The
victim told McSkimming she last saw her jewelry on December 12; she noticed
the items missing on December 18. On December 15, the victim told McSkimming
that she left her residence unlocked for a brief time at 9 pm. McSkimming noticed
there was not any sign of forced entry into the victims home. There were $2,150
worth of items taken from the victims home. A report was taken. MJ
Montecito Rotary will continue with
projects in the Congo, Magid says.
There is talk about joining forces with
the local government to bring water
to the village of Mumosho, a project
Magid, a Santa Barbara contractor, says
is feasible.
Montecito Rotary meets once a
week. The community service-based
club has 42 members with a dozen
board members. For more informa-
tion, visit www.montecitorotary.org.
MERRAG
to Celebrate 25 years
As 2011 winds to a close, Montecito
Emergency Response and Recovery
Action Group (MERRAG) recently
discussed their accomplishments over
the last year at their annual meet-
ing. Phyllis Marble, president of
MERRAG, filled us in on the latest
MERRAG news, as well as what the
groups goals are for 2012.
MERRAG is a network of trained
volunteers prepared to respond to a
community disaster during the first
72 hours following an event. The year
2012 marks the groups 25th year of
service, which Marble says is a big
accomplishment. We are looking for-
ward to celebrating, she said. Over
the last year, MERRAG has certified
several people as nationally-recog-
nized disaster service workers, and
the group participated in several train-
ing and alert exercises to test their
skills. They also completed build-
ing a garage storage facility for their
response van, located on the grounds
of Montecito Water District.
Marble says MERRAGs 25th anni-
versary will bring high expectations
from Montecito residents. It is the
groups collective hope that all homes
in Montecito will have an emergency
kit, as well as an exit plan in case
of emergency. Marble also noted the
importance of having a battery-oper-
ated radio, to get the latest emergen-
cy information from Montecito Fire
Protection Districts AM station 1380.
Next year, MERRAG will be on the
lookout for new volunteers to run
the operations center and be in the
field during emergencies. Currently
there are 30 fully-trained MERRAG
members, who in an emergency can
assist local agencies. Fifteen MERRAG
members are partially trained. There
are several levels of involvement,
Marble said, explaining there are doz-
ens of other MERRAG members who
are kept abreast in emergencies but are
not trained volunteers.
Marble says the threat of wild-
fires, earthquakes, windy weather
and other emergent conditions keeps
MERRAGs importance to Montecito
intact. We hope the Montecito com-
munity knows and respects our group,
and has confidence in our training,
she said.
For more information about
MERRAGs 25th year, as well as what
you can do to get involved, go to
www.merrag.com. MJ
Dr. Bentley gives a
diploma to a gradu-
ate of her ECW
school
VILLAGE BEAT (Continued from page 13)
A TRADI TI ON OF EXCELLENCE, PRI DE AND LEADERSHI P
Laguna Blanca School
OPEN HOUSE
Grades 5-12 Open House for Students and Parents
Saturday, January 7
9:30 a.m. Registration and Refreshments
10:00 a.m. - 12:00 p.m. Program and Tours
4125 Paloma Drive
Visit Lagunablanca.org/events for parent class
visit days for Grades K, 7 and 9
Laguna Blanca is an independent, coeducational, college preparatory day school
serving students in K-12. Tuition assistance available.

I
t was the case of a 6-year-old
Honduran boy with a wide grin
and retinoblastoma, an inherited
cancerous tumor in the eye, which
really affected Dr. Dante Pieramici,
who happens to be my husband.
The childs sister had died two years
prior of the same disease, and Dante,
a vitreoretinal surgeon with 20 years
experience knew all too well that, if
left untreated, this boy would die of
the same illness. In the U.S., 98% of the
treated children survive.
This was just one of many cases
that Dante, a partner of California
Retina Consultants, evaluated during
a recent humanitarian retina surgery
mission to El Progresso, Honduras.
Accompanied by Melvin Rabena,
research director of California Retina
Research Foundation (CRRF), and
traveling on behalf of Surgical Eye
Expeditions (SEE) International
and CRRF, he traveled to Centro
Cristiano de Servicios Humanitario
de Honduras (CCSHH) health clinic
in an effort to expand medical care
to patients suffering from diabetes-
related retinal diseases, and to estab-
lish a sustainable center to continue
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Montecito Diary
by Julia Rodgers
Montecito Doctor
Restores Sight in Honduras
Julia Rodgers lives in
Montecito with her hus-
band and two young sons.
She is a former journalist
and lawyer who moved
here from Chicago eight
years ago.
treatment for future patients.
There are only two surgical retina
specialists in the entire country of
eight million people, and they primar-
ily treat private, paying patients, said
Pieramici. Meanwhile, the majority
of Hondurans cant afford specialized
healthcare and its estimated that a
substantial and growing percentage
have diabetes related retinal diseases.
In the past, SEE International
focused on cataract surgery, however
the organization recognizes the grow-
ing burden of blindness associated
with diabetes, which is a retina issue,
and one of Pieramicis specialties at
California Retina Consultants, his
Santa Barbara-based practice.
When the team arrived at the clinic
Thanksgiving week, the waiting room
was filled to capacity. One woman
traveled from Tegucigalpa, a four-
hour drive, and slept outside the clinic
awaiting the U.S. doctors arrival. Due
to the clinics scheduling process (all
patients were given a 7:30 am appoint-
ment time), many waited more than
six hours to be examined. Fifty-five
year old patient Suyala Gonzalez
arrived at 6:30 am, remarking, Its
a great opportunity to see a doctor
from the United States. I would never
be able to afford this type of care.
Kelbim, a tall, thin 14-year-old boy
from San Pedro Sula said he has had
a problem with his left eye for one
year, but couldnt afford treatment.
Unfortunately, by the time Dante
saw his detached retina it was too
advanced to operate. The good news:
his vision and the ocular condition of
his other eye were excellent.
We are seeing a lot of cases that
have progressed to an untreatable
level, remarked Rabena, who said the
window of opportunity for treating
patients is limited and therein lies the
challenge. Proper and early screening
is paramount, and local doctors and
nurses need to be trained to detect
problems before they escalate, however,
most patients dont seek out care in a
timely fashion. Dr. Ramirez, a general
ophthalmologist at CCSHH, observed
Pieramici in the operating room and
hopes to continue ongoing training.
A Family Affair
While Dante was treating patients
in the clinic, our daughters were help-
ing people in the community. CCSHH
has a charitable division that is dedi-
cated to improving the quality of life
for the Honduran poor by providing
education and promoting a healthier
lifestyle. Arin (11) and her sister Lily
(9), both students at Crane Country
Day School, were able to assist Lorena
Tejada, who oversees the clinics Good
Samaritan efforts, by packaging and
delivering gift bags and food to El
Progressos neediest families. The girls
distributed toothbrushes and tooth-
paste, donated by Global Grins, to 90
boys at ProNino orphanage. They also
distributed school supplies and toys to
a dozen extremely destitute children,
and delivered fruit, new sheets and
towels to nursing home seniors. Arin
said she was most moved by the story
of a pretty 16- year-old paraplegic.
She lives up a garbage-filled, dirt road
high on the hill, and her mom has to
carry her daughter on her back to take
her to school. But the mom got a hernia
Full disclosure: The author of this article, Ann Pieramici, is Dr. Pieramicis wife. She
accompanied her family to Honduras, equipped with a notepad, a camera, and a certain
nervousness that only a mother can understand.
Carmen, nurse at CCSHH; Melvin Rabena, research director California Retina Research Foundation; Dr.
Ramirez, Dr. Pieramici and Melvin Tejada, Executive Director, CCSHH
Patient Suyala Gonzalez waited more than six
hours to be examined by Pieramici and his team
Arin and Lily Pieramici, students at Crane Country Day, visit some of the most destitute families in El
Progresso, Honduras during their Thanksgiving break, delivering school supplies, clothing and toys
Tuesday, Jan 10
at 6:30 PM
Program begins promptly.
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so now she cant carry her daughter,
explained Arin. Lily, who was visibly
moved by the experience, was happy
to be helping the children but says she
also wished she had food for all the
sad dogs, many of which are mal-
nourished, mangy, and homeless.
According to Dr. Pieramici, bring-
ing us along on the trip was a way to
widen our girls scope of the world
and show them the meaning of giv-
ing, I hope my daughters gained a
greater appreciation for what they
have and more compassion for those
less privileged.
Ongoing Programs
Honduras is one of the poorest coun-
tries in the western hemisphere, with
approximately 65% of the population
living in poverty. Healthcare is unreli-
able and specialized care is unobtain-
able for most. The goal of CCSHH is
to treat everyone regardless of ability
to pay. Pieramici claims the clinic has
a well-trained, dedicated staff but the
equipment is not up to U.S. standards.
This is the first of many diabetic
treatment programs around the world
for SEE International. Future expedi-
tions include Vietnam, Panama and
Bolivia. Pieramici, a SEE Board mem-
ber and Rabena, hope to return to
Honduras with a larger staff and bet-
ter equipment. And though humani-
tarian care is becoming more difficult
in Honduras due to increasing crime,
Pieramici and Rabena are intent on
returning. We had to turn away many
patients who traveled a distance to
see us, said Pieramici, who worked
at the clinic for four days. We wish
we could have helped more people,
agreed Rabena.
Of course that includes the memora-
ble 6-year-old boy Pieramici met on his
first day at the clinic and who, despite
his best efforts, continues to have lin-
gering problems. He was referred to
a larger hospital in Honduras and
Pieramici is also looking into options to
fly him to Miami for specialized care.
The California Retina Research
Foundation is a nonprofit, research-
oriented division of the California
Retina Consultants that offers clinical
trial research to a variety of patients
along the Southern Coast and Central
Valley of California. It is paid for by
private donations. Visit www.califor
niaretina.com for more information or
call 805-963-1648.
Santa Barbara-based Surgical Eye
Expeditions (SEE) International was
founded in 1974 as a humanitarian
medical nonprofit organization. It has
completed more than 400,000 sight-
restoring surgeries worldwide, with a
record 15,463 surgeries, performed in
2010. For more information, visit www.
seeintl.org or call 805-963-3303. MJ
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MISCELLANy (Continued from page 18)

order being relegated to the servants
quarters, known as the Bachelor Wing
because it normally houses many of
the single men on staff.
The servants who were there had to
pack up their belongings and move
into the footmens bedrooms, prompt-
ing much grumbling among those
staff members who had to double up
and share.
Its a large country house by any
standards, but, given all the new hus-
bands, wives and children, they were
crammed in like sardines this year.
Oh dear...
Kriss Rose-Colored Glasses
The family of basketball star Kris
Humphries had reservations about
his relationship with reality TV star
Kim Kardashian from the day he
started dating her, it would seem.
They were surprised by the
speedy intensity of the union between
Humphries, 26, and Kardashian, 31.
And, according to RadarOnline.
com, they suggest Humphries had
no time to remove his rose tinted
glasses before Kardashian hit him
with divorce papers just 72 days after
their publicity-saturated wedding in
Montecito.
We expressed concern to him about
his relationship with Kim, a close
family member tells the website.
We were quite surprised that it was
as serious as it was with them. But he
was just taken away by her, and you
cant tell someone in love to open their
eyes a little wider. He just saw what he
wanted to see.
Although Kardashian has been
accused of staging the marriage and
divorce for publicity, Humphries was
genuinely in love then authentically
heartbroken, says the source.
In the meantime, I note the latest Us
Weekly, in its Best of for 2011, lauds
the Royal Wedding between Prince
William and Kate Middleton, while
blasting the Kardashian nuptials as
the worst, calling it a waste of time
and money!
Interestingly, as you know, I did
commentary on both for national TV.
From one extreme to the other!...
Diamond in the Rough
As the gap between the rich and
the poor has never been more pro-
nounced, the launch of a million dol-
lar perfume is set to really divide the
haves and have nots.
Encrusted with diamonds and rare
gemstones, the luxury bottle is, fortu-
nately, being sold in aid of charity.
Beverly Hills celebrity jeweler
Martin Katz has teamed up with
designers at DKNY to create the glit-
tering masterpiece, which is set to
go on a world tour before being sold
off for the humanitarian organization,
Action Against Hunger.
The apple-shaped bottle is carved
from yellow and white gold and spar-
kles with 2,700 round brilliant white
diamonds weighing 15.17 carats.
On the side the Manhattan skyline is
shaped out of 183 golden yellow sap-
phires, while the cap is embellished
with a 2.43 carat flawless vivid yel-
low canary diamond, with yet more
diamonds making up the DKNY logo.
Katz, who is famed for decorating
the stars at the Oscars and Golden
Globes, spent 1,500 hours with his
team making the bottle.
The sweet smell of excess...
Chafed Coiffeur
Its curling tongs at dawn over the
Duchess of Cambridge.
HRHs longtime crimper, James
Pryce, who accompanied her on the
royal trip to Santa Barbara and Los
Angeles in July, has just quit the
Chelsea, London, salon of Richard
Ward, where he had worked for the
past eight years.
It seems the work led to a series
of clashes at the celebrity salon, cul-
minating in his departure as creative
director last month.
The final straw came when Ward
allegedly discovered Pryce was giv-
ing his personal details to clients, in
breach of his contract.
Both men will now be eager to retain
the future queen as a client, alongside
her mother, Carole, and sister, Pippa.
Royal observers believe Kate will
remain with Pryce, who has become a
good friend.
All too hair raising for words...
Sightings: Emily Blunt and hus-
band, John Krasinski, chowing down
at Olio e Limone... Stuart Whitman
getting his Java jolt at Pierre Lafond...
Comedian David Spades father, Sam,
checking out Caf Del Sol
Pip! Pip! for now - and Happy New
Year!
Readers with tips, sightings and
amusing items for Richards column
should e-mail him at richardmin-
eards@verizon.net or send invita-
tions or other correspondence to the
Journal MJ
Royal flap over Kates hairdresser
land at the YMCA preschool at 7 pm for
their Holiday Concert. Julie Henleys
Room 1 students dressed as the 10
Little Angels and sang Christmas
Star, Ruth Ambrizs Room 2 kids
were dressed for Hanukkah and sang
This Little Light of Mine. Annie
Fischers Room 3 kids stole the show
with a four-act play of the Christmas
story. They constructed a theater in
the Ys gym, with a stage curtain
made out of four white shower cur-
tains with gold stars. All the kids
made their costumes, learned their
lines and memorized song lyrics. The
finale song was Feliz Navidad,
during which the students played
tambourines, maracas, and bells and
danced for joy. MJ
S
anta and I continued our
annual date for the coverage of
the holiday concerts at MUS,
El Montecito Early School and the
YMCA.
We headed over to Montecito Union
School on the morning of Friday,
December 16 for Pam McClendons
Annual Winter Sing in the schools
auditorium. I would be remiss if I did
not mention that Pam announced her
retirement from MUS. She mentioned
she has been there 40 years, and I
retorted, So... how about forty more!
As she proceeded to direct the concert,
she remained, as always, smiling at
her students the entire time.
The chorus sang holiday favorites
from Seasons Greetings to The
Cookie Baking Song, Hanukkah
Celebration songs, and Silent Night
in both English and Spanish. MUS
accompanist Anna Abbey was also
smiling at a pitch-perfect concert.
Students played various drums and
xylophone instruments and the school
band led by Ron Zecher, conducting
from his piano, was also a fine treat,
sounding tight in the sax and clarinet
sections. The show concluded with
the annual visit from Santa Claus,
who came skipping through the audi-
ence and stopped to dance with Pam
on his way to the stage.
Immediately following the MUS
concert, we scooted down to the upper
village to El Montecito Early Schools
20-plus year annual Las Posadas
which means the Inn in English
ceremony. For the ceremony, all the
students travel through the school
with a candle, looking for a room
at the inn to emulate the journey of
Mary and Joseph. They found room
at Parish Hall, where they were wel-
comed by the schools director, Suzy
Dobreski. The children were then led
to the stage to sing a Christmas song,
accompanied by music director, Dr.
Mike Eglin. They sang Christmas in
the Manger, Christmas Christmas,
and Happy Birthday Baby Jesus.
Parents and teachers decorated the
hall in traditional holiday fashion, and
a celebratory luncheon was enjoyed.
Santa and I were happy to finally
MUS kindergarteners performing the Cookie Baking Song
ELMO Early School students singing Christmas songs for their teachers and parents
YMCA preschool students perform the Christmas story
The entire YMCA preschool with director Annie Fischer on the far right
MUS band director Ron Zecher, conducting the
band and playing the piano for the Winter Sing
Montecito
Union School
music direc-
tor, Pam
McClendon,
with her
students per-
forming at the
Winter Sing
Our Town
by Joanne A. Calitri
Joanne is a professional international photographer and journalist. Contact her at :
jcalitri_internationalphoto@yahoo.com
School Holiday Concerts, Part Two
was often referred to as Queen of
Fiesta. The subject of my August 11,
2011 Trail Talk column, Hattie par-
ticipated in every Fiesta parade since
the very first one, way back in 1924.
This August, the parade will simply
not be the same without the familiar,
tiny figure in the blue dress waving
to the crowd, urging them to Viva la
Fiesta.
Hattie served as Grand Marshal of
El Desfile Historico three different
times: in 1983, again in 1999, and for
the last time in 2011. She was also a
member of The Fillies, as well as other
womens trail riding groups such as
the Saddle Skirts and the Sage Hens.
Hattie was born in 1911 in Cottage
Hospital. She is survived by her son,
John, and daughter Teresita (Cita)
Mainer, as well as their respective
families.
Fred Foy (1921-2010)
News of Fred Foys death on
December 22, 2010 arrived after last
years press deadline (no pun intend-
ed), hence his inclusion on this years
list. While the name of Fred Foy may
not be readily recognizable, his most
famous radio lines are, especially
when heard against the background
of Rossinis William Tell overture:
A fiery horse with the speed of light,
a cloud of dust, and a hearty Hi-Ho,
Silver! Away!
Fred Foy served as the announcer for
The Lone Ranger, making American
history with the beloved show that
began on the radio, then continued on
television starring Clayton Moore as
the Lone Ranger and Jay Silverheels
as his Indian sidekick, Tonto.
Although Foy was not the first
announcer for The Lone Ranger,
which debuted on the radio in 1933,
he joined the show in the late 1940s
and kept the position until it went off
the air in the late 1950s. He also served
as the announcer on the television
version for its entire run, from 1949
to 1957.
Foy was born in Detroit, Michigan,
and served in the U.S. Army during
World War II, during which time he
was an announcer for Armed Forces
Radio in Cairo. His post-war career
also included jobs as announcer for
The Green Hornet (the grandneph-
ew of the Lone Ranger) and Sergeant
Preston of the Yukon. In 2000, Foy
was inducted into the Radio Hall of
Fame. When Fred Foy died of natural
causes, his wife of 63 years, Frances,
and three children survived him.
Clarence Minetti (1918-2011)
Clarence Minetti was born in
Cayucos, but grew up in the small
community of Guadalupe where he
will always be immortalized, now that
West Main Street within the city limits
has been renamed Clarence Minetti
Memorial Road. He married his wife
of more than 70 years, Rosalie, in 1940,
and the following year went to work
for her father as a ranch hand on his
Corralitos Ranch. When his father-in-
law died in 1947, Clarence took over
the dry farming and cattle operation.
In 1958, he and his lifelong business
partner, Richard Maretti, opened the
Far Western Tavern in Guadalupe,
famous to this day as the place to go for
authentic Santa Maria-style Barbeque.
But Minettis success as a rancher,
businessman and restaurateur pale
in comparison to his civic involve-
ment and extensive dedication to the
Central Coast community, which is
far too lengthy to list here. Minetti
was chosen as Honorary Vaquero of
the 1988 Old Spanish Days Fiesta, and
was a revered member of the mens
trail riding groups Vaqueros de los
Ranchos and Rancheros Visitadores.
The list of honors he received through-
out his lifetime would fill several more
columns.
Clarence Minetti died at age 93 from
injuries sustained when the vehicle in
which he was riding was hit in a head-
on collision last March, when a car
driven by Elvia Tello made an unsafe
attempt to pass a slower big-rig (the
District Attorneys office charged
Tello with vehicular manslaughter
with gross negligence charges, but
the case is ongoing as of press time).
Manettis wife, Rosalie, their three
children, as well as their extended
families, survive him.
Jane Russell (1921-2011)
Anyone who has seen Jane Russells
comedic talents while singing
Buttons and Bows with Roy Rogers,
The King of the Cowboys, while
fending off the fraternity-boy antics
of Bob Hope in the 1952 film Son of
Paleface, knows why she is on this
list.
Legend has it that Bob Hope, famous
for his one-liners, once introduced her
as the two and only Jane Russell, of
TRAIL TALK (Continued from page 22)
Fred Foy, whose
voice was familiar
to millions as the
announcer for The
Lone Ranger
Clarence
Minetti was
a stalwart
fixture of the
Central Coast
ranching
community
Did you find it yet? Did you find it yet?
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course referring to her famous bust-
line. With measurements of 38D-24-
36, Russell was, in her prime, one of
the sexiest and most beautiful of any
woman in show business. Everyone
talks about her breakout role in the
Howard Hughes film The Outlaw,
which was literally held up from gen-
eral release for years due to censor-
ship issues related directly to Russells
sexy appearance. But Bob Hopes
witty introduction could also refer to
Russells double life, as what she
accomplished off-screen was so last-
ing and profound. As the founder of
World Adoption International Fund
(WAIF), Russell helped facilitate the
adoption of over 50,000 orphaned
children. Thats an entire city!
During the years that Jane Russell
was a resident of Montecito, she gen-
erously opened her home for worth-
while fundraisers, often for her favor-
ite Republican candidates. Her death
in March at age 90 resulted in thou-
sands of pages of ink with the details
of her life, which are easily accessible
on the web. But she was personal-
ly beloved to many locals, some of
whom spoke at her funeral. Anyone
who doesnt remember what a talent-
ed force she was should invest some
time on You Tube, where many of her
best moments live on in cyberspace.
David Wells (1915-2011)
When David Wells died in March
of this year at age 95, we lost another
member of the greatest generation.
David was a Southern California
boy, raised in Santa Monica where
he became an Eagle Scout. His fas-
cination with the ocean led him to
continue in the Sea Scouting program,
and he became an avid sailor. In the
1930s, he participated several times
in the Transpacific Race, which cov-
ers more than two thousand miles
of open ocean between California
and Hawaii. When World War
II broke out, Wells joined the U.S.
Navy, and eventually achieved the
rank of Lieutenant Commander. He
served primarily on the U.S.S. Gwin,
and was involved in the battles of
Midway and Guadalcanal. Wells was
then assigned to the Naval Torpedo
Station in Newport, Rhode Island,
where he taught torpedo weaponry
for the duration of the war.
In 1947, David Wells and his new
bride settled in Goleta on the prop-
erty they called Harvest Hill Ranch. In
addition to producing avocados, lem-
ons and walnuts, Wells and his fam-
ily raised Welsh ponies. Harvest Hill
Ranch became a nationally recognized
name as one of the top breeding farms
of Welsh ponies, which were shown at
horse shows in several states.
David Wells was a popular mem-
ber of several local mens trail rid-
ing groups, including Rancheros
Visitadores, Los Pobres Rancheros,
and Santa Barbara Trail Riders.
Robert James Jim Westwick
(1931-2011)
A third-generation Barbarano,
Jim Westwick was born in Cottage
Hospital. An avid tennis player in his
youth, he played on the tennis team at
both Santa Barbara High School and
UCSB. After serving three years in the
U.S. Army during the 1950s, Jim went
to San Francisco to study at Hastings
College of Law. He established his law
practice in Santa Barbara after being
admitted to the Bar in 1959.
Jim was a trail enthusiast who
loved exploring the Santa Barbara
backcountry, often on horseback. He
was a member of the Paisano camp
of Rancheros Visitadores, and also
belonged to Los Pobres Rancheros
and Santa Barbara Trail Riders.
A longtime Director of Old Spanish
Days, Jim served as El Presidente in
1982. The Fiesta Parade parties held
on the balcony of his offices over-
looking State Street were a tradition
for many years, when friends would
gather to enjoy the festivities and
Jims hospitality.
Jim Westwicks booming voice and
jovial demeanor are missed by his
many friends, and his wife, Phyllis,
who survives him. MJ
Im not big on champagne, but Id take along a bottle Cristal to pop for when the boat comes to the rescue Sam Neill
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Jane Russells
beauty was
matched
by her
determina-
tion to find
permanent
homes for
thousands
of orphaned
children
Jim Westwick in his role as El Presidente of Old
Spanish Days Fiesta in 1982
David Wells
became a
nationally-
recognized
breeder of
Welsh ponies
SATURDAY, DECEMBER 31
Fishbon Chrysalis Searching for
a creative way to spend the fnal night
of 2011? Fishbons annual New Years
Eve celebration of the collaborative
arts community is called Chrysalis
this time around, and the wild & wacky
folks at the Funk Zone warehouse are
transforming the Pescadrome into a
magical wonderland complete with a
1920s Swan Club New York Speakeasy
theme. Events include the Occupy Swan
Lake cabaret play, the Red Queens
Lounge, aerial acts and acrobatics, live
and interactive art installations, Tray
Girls, several DJs, and much more from
the merry mayhem members. WHEN:
9pm WHERE: 101 S. Quarantina Street
COST: $50 (pre-sale only) INFO: www.
fshbonsb.ning.com
New Years in Ojai Skip the Irish
whiskey and ring in 2012 with Irish
music, courtesy of Mollys Revenge!
The Ojai Concert Series the folks
who present a wonderfully down-home
music series at their ranch home during
the warmer months are bringing the
dynamic, acoustic Celtic band known
for its unique and infectious enthusiasm
back to town for the big night. The
band boasts a classic combination of
bagpipes, whistle, fiddle and guitar
spicing up the sound with bouzouki,
bodhran and mandola, a combination
that has landed them gigs at many of
the top folk festivals and performing arts
events across the country, and across
the pond in places like Australia and
China. Their arrangements of traditional
Celtic jigs and reels bring the dance
tunes up to date with a driving, hard-
edged accent. And when the band stops
playing at 11pm, the recorded music
takes over, with elegant and romantic
waltzes playing until past midnight.
The whole affair is also a a dessert
and finger-food potluck party, so bring
something to share (the promoters got
the the party favors and the bubbly
covered). WHEN: 8pm WHERE: Ojai
Valley Womans Club, 441 E. Ojai
Avenue COST: $25 general, $12 for
children under 14, free under 6 (if you
can keep em quiet) INFO: 665-8852 or
www.ojaiconcertseries.com
WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 4
Slack key sans parody Hawaiian
slack key guitarist Jim Kimo West
is best known for working with the
comedy singer-songwriter Weird Al
Yankovic, appearing on a great many
of the parodists albums, videos and
concerts. But hes also released four solo
slack-key guitar albums and its in that
guise that well hear him on Wednesday,
in the little Santa Barbara haven for
Hawaiian artists otherwise known as
SOhO. West, who lives in Los Angeles
and also writes and produces music
for film, TV and commercials, travels
regularly to the islands to brush up on
his Ki Hoalu (slack-key) technique, at
which hes considered a master. WHEN:
8pm WHERE: SOhO, 1221 State Street,
upstairs in Victoria Court COST: $15
INFO: 962-7776 or www.sohosb.com
CALENDAR OF EVENTS
Note to readers: This entertainment calendar is a subjective sampling of arts and other events taking place in the Santa Barbara
area this week. It is by no means comprehensive. Be sure to read feature stories in each issue that complement the calendar. In
order to be considered for inclusion in this calendar, information must be submitted no later than noon on the Wednesday prior
to publication. Please send all news releases and digital artwork to news@montecitojournal.net and/or slibowitz@yahoo.com
by Steven Libowitz

FRIDAY, DECEMBER 30
Kinda fonda
Wanda She
briefy dated
and sang with
Elvis Presley. She
basically popularized
rockabilly as a
genre for women.
She hit the Top 40
as a country singer,
and gave pianist
Big Al Downing and
guitarist Roy Clark
their early exposure
as members of her
band. She was
inducted into the
Rock and Roll Hall
of Fame in 2009 as
an early infuence. And at age 74, Wanda Jackson continues her 50-year-plus
rein as the Queen of Rockabilly with yet another tour of fery performances, full of
vim and vigor and take-no-prisoner singing. The Fujiyama Mama returns to SOhO
for a rollicking New Year's Eve roll through a treasure trove of her hits from Hot
Dog! That Made Him Mad, Right or Wrong and Lets Have a Party to selections
from The Party Aint Over, her 2011 album recorded with Jack White that included
Dylans Thunder on the Mountain, and charted as high at No. 58 on the Billboard
Top 200, making Jackson the oldest female artist ever to accomplish the feat.
Rockabilly boogie, indeed! WHEN: 9pm WHERE: SOhO, 1221 State Street COST:
$22 INFO: 962-7776 or www.sohosb.com

SATURDAY, DECEMBER 31
Loggins & Lois Theres plenty of
reasons to ring in 2012 at SOhO besides
the fact that the musical entertainment
comes from the aptly-named Midnight
Band. Like, for example, lead vocalist
Lois Mahalia, the supremely gifted
Caribbean-born singer named after
gospel great Mahalia Jackson who does
R&B and jazz like nobodys business. Or
maybe special guest Kenny Loggins,
the 70s and 80s rock icon who called
Montecito home for a long time before
moving to Hope Ranch. The two along
with band-mates George Friedenthal,
Randy Tico, Maitlin Ward, Donzell
Davis have made New Years Eve at
SOhO an almost annual tradition, and
pretty much a must-see event. Celebrate
em home as we celebrate the new year.
WHEN: 9pm WHERE: SOhO, 1221
State Street COST: $110 with dinner
INFO: 962-7776 or www.sohosb.com
SATURDAY, JANUARY 7
Kamatana. Come again? No,
Kamatana The obokano is a large
bass lyre played by the Gusii tribe of
Western Kenya. Dubbed the double
bass of East Africa, the obokano has
has eight strings which produce a deep
buzzy sound reminiscent of a bass
saxophone. When combined with vocals
and percussion, it provides a strong
rhythmic accompaniment. Thats just what
youll hear with Kamatana, a duo from
Kenya who are dedicated to promoting
the music of the obokano to new
audiences. Mid-thirty-year-olds Domonic
Ogari and Samwel Osieko are
Gussis who offer folk songs not only in
their native Gusii language, but also
tunes from other tribes in Kenya including
the Luhya and Luo in the west and the
Kiswahili-speaking peoples of the coast.
Which makes sense, since Kamatana
means togetherness. WHEN: 6pm
WHERE: SOhO, 1221 State Street,
upstairs in Victoria Court COST: $15 ($3
discount with dinner) INFO: 962-7776
or www.sohosb.com
The essence of dance NECTAR,
choreographer-dancer Cybil
Gilbertsons three-year-old and very bold
creative forum that challenges artists in a
variety of media to investigate a theme
and create something new, kicks off 2012
on a notion that weve all been sharing for
the past two weeks: Home. This quarters
culminating performance-forum takes place
tonight at Yoga Soup, the wonderfully
intimate and spiritually-sparked palace of
healing arts behind the Roasting Company
on lower State Street. The specifc list of
artists and performers wasnt available at
our early press time, but be assured youll
be amused, entertained, confronted and
impressed. WHEN: 7:30pm WHERE:
28 Parker Way COST: $20 INFO: 965-
8811 www.yogasoup.com or www.
cybilgilbertson.com
SUNDAY, JANUARY 8
SOS season starts If youre depressed
over already having broken half of your
New Years resolutions only a week into
to 2012, heres some help: Speaking
of Stories kicks off its new season with
Nothing But Laughs, an evening of
stories selected to tickle your funny bone
and at least make you smile if not laugh
out loud. Its a Montecito bookend, too, as
village-based actress Christina Allison
reads her own Renaldo and the Early Bird
Special to get things going, followed by
Tony Miratti and Rich Hoag teaming
up for David Mamets Duck Variations
and Meredith McMinn reading Padgett
Powells The Winnowing of Mrs. Schuping
before Bob Lesser winds up the night
with Respect by Montecito writer T.C.
Boyle. As always, SOS artistic director
Maggie Mixsell directs the show, which
will be followed by cookies and milk on
the patio as part of a reception with the
artists. WHEN: 2pm Sunday, 7pm Monday
WHERE: Center Stage Theater, upstairs
in Paseo Nuevo COST: $25 general,
$15 students INFO: 963-0408 or www.
centerstagetheater.org MJ
29 December 2011 5 January 2012 MONTECITO JOURNAL 33 Ive been in love with the same woman for forty-one years; if my wife finds out, shell kill me Henny Youngman
Ernies World
by Ernie Witham
Ernies latest book, A Year in the Life of a Working Writer. A
Memoir to the Best of the Recollection of Ernie Witham, is now
available for Kindles and iPads on amazon.com
A
few years ago we bought a co-
op Christmas tree. The idea was
that one year it would be at our
house and the next year it would be at
Carl, Christy, Leila and Charlies house.
It was pretty expensive and I probably
would have objected had I known
anything about it. But I didnt fnd out
about it until I came home from work
one day and it was all set up in our
dining area.
Merry Christmas! they all yelled.
I looked up at the ten foot tall behe-
moth with its pre-attached lights and
perfect branches. A giant ominous-
looking white box sat on the floor next
to the forever-green. It had Chinese
writing on the side.
Carl put it up. It was easy.
I glanced at my son-in-law, but I
didnt exactly see easy in his eyes.
After Christmas, we simply take
apart the easy-to-assemble sections
and pack it away for next year.
There was that word easy again.
Christy and the kids started singing
Christmas songs. I felt a bit nauseous,
er nostalgic.
Well never have to buy another real
tree and watch it die.
I do have to admit, I have had some
less-than-joyous experiences with real
trees. One year in New Hampshire, my
buddy Del and I offered to cut down
trees for everyone who gave us money.
Del brought a chainsaw. Being a logical
thinker, Del figured it wasnt worth fir-
ing the thing up unless we were going
to cut trunks the width of a telephone
pole. Quickly we had cut four trees
that were exactly twice as long as my
K5 Chevy Blazer. I drove home with
one hand on the wheel and one arm
around the ends of two trees that were
resting on my dashboard. I couldnt
even see Del. Surprisingly, people were
not all that pleased with their eighteen-
foot tall trees that they had to make
special tree stands to accommodate.
Plus my Blazer smelled like pine sap
for months.
Another time I cut a perfect tree, but
the bottom was uneven so it wouldnt
fit in the stand. I trimmed a bit, then a
bit more, then a bit more, until I ended
up with a tree that was six feet wide
and three feet tall.
So maybe this tree was a good thing.
Especially seeing as how just after
Christmas again while I was at work
Carl took the tree down, packed it up
and put it in the garage.
Two years later, Carl put it up and
took it down again. Great guy that
Carl.
Then a few weeks ago it was our turn
for the tree again. I called Carl.
Sorry, said Christy, Carls away
on business. Should be pretty easy
though.
This one must go next, I said as I
hefted the metal section up the steplad-
der. I felt a twinge in my lower back.
No, that one is larger than this one
so its nearer to the bottom.
Is this the top?
Thats the part that goes in the
stand.
I already put a piece in the stand.
That one may be upside down. See
how the branches are pointing toward
the floor.
#$@%$#@!
Did you just curse me?
No, that was aimed at the Republic
of Chinas tree manufacturing divi-
sion.
Somehow we finally got it assembled
then we connected the cords that ran
from section to section and plugged in
the lights. Just the bottom lit up.
Seems darker than usual, my wife
said.
I climbed the ladder and switched
plugs. This time the middle lit up.
I switched them again. This time the
top lit briefly then they all went out.
I kept switching them. Top Middle or
Bottom. Top Middle or Bottom.
Finally, some four hours, three
extension cords, and a roll of duct
tape later, most of the lights were lit.
We put on the decorations and that
was that.
Until today.
I think its time to pack away the
easy-to assemble pieces, my wife said.
I called Carl. He was away on anoth-
er business trip.
How about we just throw a giant
sheet over it until next year? We can tell
people its a piece of modern art.
Ill get the box, my wife said.
Carl, if youre reading this, you have
less than two years to find a new job
that doesnt involve traveling. MJ
Artificial Unintelligence
I trimmed a bit, then a bit more, then a bit more, until I ended up
with a tree that was six feet wide and three feet tall

FRIDAY, JANUARY 6
Hot Tuna & cool blues
The acoustic concert of the
year might just be happening
in the frst week of 2012, as
two veterans whose careers
date back to the 1960s team
up for a tantalizing tour.
Both Hot Tuna and David
Bromberg have played the
Lobero before, but this tandem
show is a tantalizing treat of
folk-rock and Americana from
guys with about 150 years
of combined experience. Hot
Tunas Jorma Kaukonen
and Jack Casady who
frst got together as teenagers
in Northern California and
have played together on and
off ever since present a
much-copied but never topped
blend of bluegrass, blues
and folk. The same description could apply to Bromberg, as the multi-instrumentalist
can play anything with strings while also adding country-swing, ragtime, R&B and
jazz to the mix. Kaukonen & Casady are also members of the Rock and Roll Hall of
Fame, courtesy of their long association with just about every iteration of Jefferson
Airplane (later Starship). Steady as She Goes, the duos spring 2011 release, is an
apt if clichd title, as the boys just keep deliverin the goods, time after time after
time. Bromberg, who will appear with his quartet, began his career on the East
Coast, basically busking in Greenwich Villages basket houses before winning
jobs backing up Tom Paxton, Rosalie Sorrels and Jerry Jeff Walker, among
others. Later, his chops earned him gigs as a hired gun for the likes of Bob Dylan,
The Eagles, Ringo Starr, Willie Nelson and Carly Simon, to name just a few,
but it was his association with Walker that led to his rendition of Mr. Bojangles, a
seven-minute song that lifted Bromberg above the fray for good in 1972. Brombergs
ability for spinning quirky, humorous yarns is as prodigious as his instrumental
prowess; How Latell Ya Play Til remains one of the greatest live albums of all time
(check out Will Not Be Your Fool for some riotously funny venom-spewing in
perhaps the best break-up song in history). 2011s Use Me, his latest album, proves
hes still got it, too. WHEN: 8pm WHERE: Lobero Theatre, 33 W. Canon Perdido
Street COST: $32 & $42 INFO: 963-0761 or www.lobero.com

SATURDAY, JANUARY 7
Kids Helping Kids
Theres something particularly
heartwarming about beginning
the new year at the Granada
with the sort of pay-it-forward
event that gives one hope for the
future. Kids Helping Kids is an
economics-business program run
as a nonproft at San Marcos
High School that culminates with
an annual concert programmed,
promoted, publicized and
presented in every facet (including
white gloved, suit-wearing ushers and assistants) by the advanced students in the
program. The students have raised more than half a million dollars since KHK was
founded in 2002; all proceeds go directly to charity, including causes such as the
Unity Shoppe, the Ubumwe Center Pre-School in Rwanda, and their San Marcos
Fund, which helps pay for students school and test fees. For their fourth year at the
Granada, the students have once again found an appropriate headliner (following
SMHS alum Toad the Wet Sprocket, Five For Fighting and Mat Kearney) in Sara
Bareilles. The singer-songwriter-guitarist-pianist, only a decade removed from
college herself, hit the big time in 2007 with the hit single Love Song, which topped
Billboards Pop 100 chart and earned the frst of her three Grammy nominations.The
wholesome Bareilles has sold more than a million records in the United States alone
and is currently serving as a celebrity judge on the third season of NBCs The Sing-
Off, alongside Ben Folds and Shawn Stockman of Boyz II Men. As in every
previous year, LA-based soul singer-songwriter Tyrone Wells opens the show, which
also features a performance by the winner of Royals Got Talent, the American Idol-
style show put on by Kids Helping Kids at San Marcos High School, plus a bountiful
selection of silent auction items. WHEN: 7pm WHERE: Granada, 1214 State St.
COST: $33-78 INFO: 899-2222 www.granadasb.org or www.kidshelpingkidssb.org
Bella Vista $$$
1260 Channel Drive (565-8237)
Featuring a glass retractable roof, Bella Vis-
tas ambiance is that of an elegant outdoor
Mediterranean courtyard. Executive Chef
Alessandro Cartumini has created an inno-
vative menu, featuring farm fresh, Italian-
inspired California cuisine. Open daily for
breakfast, lunch and dinner from 7 am
to 9 pm.
Cafe Del Sol $$
30 Los Patos Way (969-0448)
CAVA $$
1212 Coast Village Road (969-8500)
Regional Mexican and Spanish cooking
combine to create Latin cuisine from tapas
and margaritas, mojitos, seafood paella
and sangria to lobster tamales, Churrasco
ribeye steak and seared Ahi tuna. Sunfower-
colored interior is accented by live Span-
ish guitarist playing next to cozy beehive
freplace nightly. Lively year-round outdoor
people-wat ching front patio. Open Monday-
Friday 11 am to 10 pm. Saturday and Sunday
10 am to 10 pm.
China Palace $$
Montecitos only Chinese restaurant, here youll
fnd large portions and modern dcor. Take out
available. (Montecito Journal staff is especially
fond of the Cashew Chicken!) China Palace also
has an outdoor patio. Open seven days 11:30 am
to 9:30 pm.
Giovannis $
Los Arroyos $
Little Alexs $
1024 A-Coast Village Road (969-2297)
Luckys (brunch) $$ (dinner) $$$
Comfortable, old-fashioned urban steak-
house in the heart of Americas biggest
little village. Steaks, chops, seafood,
cocktails, and an enormous wine list are
featured, with white tablecloths, fine
crystal and vintage photos from the 20th
century. The bar (separate from dining
room) features large flat-screen TV and
opens at 4 pm during the week. Open
nightly from 5 pm to 10 pm; Saturday &
Sunday brunch from 9 am to 3 pm.
Valet Parking.
Montecito Caf $$
Montecito Coffee Shop $
1498 East Valley Road (969-6250)
Montecito Wine Bistro $$$
516 San Ysidro Road 969-7520
Head to Montecitos upper village to indulge
in some California bistro cuisine. Chef
Nathan Heil creates seasonal menus that
$ (average per person under $15)
$$ (average per person $15 to $30)
$$$ (average per person $30 to $45)
$$$$ (average per person $45-plus)
MONTECI TO EATERI ES . . . A Gu i d e
include fsh and vegetarian dishes, and fresh
fatbreads straight out of the wood-burning
oven. The Bistro offers local wines, classic
and specialty cocktails, single malt scotches
and aged cognacs.
Pane Vino $$$
Peabodys $
Plow & Angel $$$
San Ysidro Ranch
900 San Ysidro Lane (565-1700)
Enjoy a comfortable atmosphere as you dine
on traditional dishes such as mac n cheese and
ribs. The ambiance is enhanced with original
artwork, including stained glass windows
and an homage to its namesake, Saint Isadore,
hanging above the freplace. Dinner is served
from 5 to 10 pm daily with bar service extend-
ing until 11 pm weekdays and until midnight
on Friday and Saturday.
Sakana Japanese Restaurant $$
Stella Mares $$/$$$
50 Los Patos Way (969-6705)
Stonehouse $$$$
San Ysidro Ranch
900 San Ysidro Lane (565-1700)
Located in what is a 19th-century citrus pack-
inghouse, Stonehouse restaurant features a
lounge with full bar service and separate dining
room with crackling freplace and creekside
views. Chef Jamie Wests regional cuisine is
prepared with a palate of herbs and vegetables
harvested from the on-site chefs garden.
Recently voted 1 of the best 50 restaurants in
America by OpenTable Diners Choice. 2010
Diners Choice Awards: 1 of 50 Most Romantic
Restaurants in America, 1 of 50 Restaurants
With Best Service in America. Open for dinner
from 6 to 10 pm daily. Sunday Brunch 10 am
to 2 pm.
Trattoria Mollie $$$
Tre Lune $$/$$$
A real Italian boite, complete with small but
fully licensed bar, big list of Italian wines, large
comfortable tables and chairs, lots of mahogany
and large b&w vintage photos of mostly fa-
mous Italians. Menu features both comfort food
like mama used to make and more adventurous
Italian fare. Now open continuously from lunch
to dinner. Also open from 7:30 am to 11:30 am
daily for breakfast.
Via Vai Trattoria Pizzeria $$
Delis, bakeries, juice bars
Blenders in the Grass
Heres The Scoop
1187 Coast Village Road (lower level)
(969-7020)
Gelato and Sorbet are made on the premises.
Open Monday through Thursday 1 pm to 9 pm,
12 pm to 10 pm Friday and Saturday, and 12
pm to 9 pm on Sundays. Scoopie also offers a
full coffee menu featuring Santa Barbara Roast-
ing Company coffee. Offerings are made from
fresh, seasonal ingredients found at Farmers
Market, and waffe cones are made on site
everyday.
Jeannines
Montecito Deli
Open six days a week from 7 am to 3 pm.
(Closed Sunday) This eatery serves home-
made soups, fresh salads, sandwiches, and
its specialty, The Piadina, a homemade flat
bread made daily. Owner Jeff Rypysc and
staff deliver locally and cater office parties,
luncheons or movie shoots. Also serving
breakfast (7am to 11 am), and brewing Peets
coffee & tea.
Panino
1014 #C Coast Village Road (565-0137)
Pierre Lafond
516 San Ysidro Road (565-1502)
This market and deli is a center of activity
in Montecitos Upper Village, serving fresh
baked pastries, regular and espresso coffee
drinks, smoothies, burritos, homemade
soups, deli salads, made-to-order sandwiches
and wraps available, and boasting a fully
stocked salad bar. Its sunny patio draws
crowds of regulars daily. The shop also
carries specialty drinks, gift items, grocery
staples, and produce. Open everyday 5:30 am
to 8 pm.
Village Cheese & Wine

In Summerland / Carpinteria
The Barbecue Company $$
3807 Santa Claus Lane (684-2209)
Cantwells Summerland Market $
2580 Lillie Avenue (969-5894)
Corktree Cellars $$
910 Linden Avenue (684-1400)
Corktree offers a casual bistro setting for
lunch and dinner, in addition to wine
tasting and tapas. The restaurant, open
everyday except Monday, features art from
locals, mellow music and a relaxed atmo-
sphere. An extensive wine list features over
110 bottles of local and international wines,
which are also available in the eatery's
retail section.
Garden Market $
Jacks Bistro $
5050 Carpinteria Avenue (566-1558)
Serving light California Cuisine, Jacks offers
freshly baked bagels with whipped cream
cheeses, omelettes, scrambles, breakfast bur-
ritos, specialty sandwiches, wraps, burgers,
salads, pastas and more. Jacks offers an ex-
tensive espresso and coffee bar menu, along
with wine and beer. They also offer full ser-
vice catering, and can accommodate wedding
receptions to corporate events. Open Monday
through Friday 6:30 am to 3 pm, Saturday
and Sunday 7 am to 3 pm.
Nugget $$
Padaro Beach Grill $
A beach house feel gives this seaside eatery
its charm and makes it a perfect place to
bring the whole family. Its new owners added
a pond, waterfall, an elevated patio with
freplace and couches to boot. Enjoy grill op-
tions, along with salads and seafood plates.
The Grill is open Monday through Sunday
11 am to 9 pm
Slys $$$
686 Linden Avenue (684-6666)
Slys features fresh fsh, farmers market veg-
gies, traditional pastas, prime steaks, Blue Plate
Specials and vintage desserts. Youll fnd a full
bar, serving special martinis and an extensive
wine list featuring California and French wines.
Cocktails from 4 pm to close, dinner from 5 to
9 pm Sunday-Thursday and 5 to 10 pm Friday
and Saturday. Lunch is M-F 11:30 to 2:30, and
brunch is served on the weekends from 9 am
to 3 pm.
Stackys Seaside $
Summerland Beach Caf $
Tinkers $
2275 C Ortega Hill Road (969-1970)
Santa Barbara / Restaurant Row
Andersens Danish Bakery &
Gourmet Restaurant $
1106 State State Street (962-5085)
Established in 1976, Andersens serves Danish
and European cuisine including breakfast,
lunch & dinner. Authentic Danishes, Apple
Strudels, Marzipans, desserts & much more.
Dine inside surrounded by European interior
or outside on the sidewalk patio. Open 8 am to
9 pm Monday through Friday, 8 am to 10 pm
Saturday and Sunday.
Bistro Eleven Eleven $$
1111 East Cabrillo Boulevard (730-1111)
Located adjacent to Hotel Mar Monte, the
bistro serves breakfast and lunch featur-
ing all-American favorites. Dinner is a mix
of traditional favorites and coastal cuisine.
The lounge advancement to the restaurant
features a big screen TV for daily sporting
events and happy hour. Open Monday-
Friday 6:30 am to 9 pm, Saturday and Sunday
6:30 am to 10 pm.
Chucks Waterfront Grill $$
113 Harbor Way (564-1200)
Located next to the Maritime Museum, enjoy
some of the best views of both the mountains
and the Santa Barbara pier sitting on the newly
renovated, award-winning patio, while enjoy-
ing fresh seafood straight off the boat. Dinner is
served nightly from 5 pm, and brunch is offered
on Sunday from 10 am until 1 pm. Reservations
are recommended.
El Paseo $$
813 Anacapa Street (962-6050)
Located in the heart of downtown Santa Bar-
bara in a Mexican plaza setting, El Paseo is the
place for authentic Mexican specialties, home-
29 December 2011 5 January 2012 MONTECITO JOURNAL 35 I like whiskey; I always did, and that is why I never drink it Robert E. Lee
. . . EATERI ES
made chips and salsa, and a cold margarita
while mariachis stroll through the historic
restaurant. The dcor refects its rich Spanish
heritage, with bougainvillea-draped balconies,
fountain courtyard dining and a festive bar.
Dinner specials are offered during the week,
with a brunch on Sundays. Open Tuesday
through Thursday 4 pm to 10 pm, Friday and
Saturday 11:30 am to 10:30 pm, and Sunday
10:30 am to 9 pm.
Enterprise Fish Co. $$
225 State Street (962-3313)
Every Monday and Tuesday the Enterprise
Fish Company offers two-pound Maine Lob-
sters served with clam chowder or salad, and
rice or potatoes for only $29.95. Happy hour
is every weekday from 4 pm to 7 pm. Open
Sunday thru Thursday 11:30 am to 10 pm and
Friday thru Saturday 11:30 am to 11 pm.
The Harbor Restaurant $$
210 Stearns Wharf (963-3311)
Enjoy ocean views at the historic Harbor
Restaurant on Stearns Wharf. Featuring prime
steaks and seafood, a wine list that has earned
Wine Spectator Magazines Award of Excel-
lence for the past six years and a full cocktail
bar. Lunch is served 11:30 am to 2:30 pm
Monday-Friday, 11 am to 3 pm Saturday and
Sunday. Dinner is served 5:30 pm to 10 pm,
early dinner available Saturday and Sunday
starting at 3 pm.
Los Agaves $
600 N. Milpas Street (564-2626)
Los Agaves offers eclectic Mexican cuisine, us-
ing only the freshest ingredients, in a casual and
friendly atmosphere. Serving lunch and dinner,
with breakfast on the weekends, Los Agaves fea-
tures traditional dishes from central and south-
ern Mexico such as shrimp & fsh enchiladas,
shrimp chile rellenos, and famous homemade
mole poblano. Open Monday- Friday 11 am to
9 pm, Saturday & Sunday 9 am to 9 pm.
Mir $$$$
8301 Hollister Avenue at Bacara Resort & Spa
(968-0100)
Mir is a refned refuge with stunning views,
featuring two genuine Miro sculptures, a top-
rated chef offering a sophisticated menu that
accents fresh, organic, and native-grown in-
gredients, and a world-class wine cellar. Open
Tuesday through Saturday from 6 pm
to 10 pm.
Olio e Limone Ristorante $$$
Olio Pizzeria $
17 West Victoria Street (899-2699)
Elaine and Alberto Morello oversee this
friendly, casually elegant, linen-tabletop eatery
featuring Italian food of the highest order. Of-
ferings include eggplant souff, pappardelle
with quail, sausage and mushroom rag, and
fresh-imported Dover sole. Wine Spectator
Award of Excellence-winning wine list. Private
dining (up to 40 guests) and catering are also
available.
Next door at Olio Pizzeria, the Morellos have
added a simple pizza-salumi-wine-bar inspired
by neighborhood pizzerie and enoteche in
Italy. Here the focus is on artisanal pizzas and
antipasti, with classic toppings like fresh moz-
zarella, seafood, black truffes, and sausage.
Salads, innovative appetizers and an assort-
ment of salumi and formaggi round out the
menu at this casual, fast-paced eatery. Private
dining for up to 32 guests. Both the ristorante
and the pizzeria are open for lunch Monday
thru Saturday (11:30 am to 2 pm) and dinner
seven nights a week (from 5 pm).
Pierre Lafond Wine Bistro $
516 State Street (962-1455)
The Wine Bistro menu is seasonal California
cuisine specializing in local products. Pair
your meal with wine from the Santa Barbara
Winery, Lafond Winery or one from the list
of wines from around the world. Happy
Hour Monday - Friday 4:30 to 6:30 pm. The
1st Wednesday of each month is Passport
to the World of Wine. Grilled cheese night
every Thursday. Open for breakfast, lunch
and dinner; catering available.
www.pierrelafond.com
Renauds $
3315 State Street (569-2400)
Located in Loreto Plaza, Renauds is a bakery
specializing in a wide selection of French
pastries. The breakfast and lunch menu is
composed of egg dishes, sandwiches and
salads and represents Renauds personal
favorites. Brewed coffees and teas are organic.
Open Monday-Saturday 7 am to 5 pm, Sunday
7 am to 3 pm.
Rodneys Steakhouse $$$
633 East Cabrillo Boulevard (884-8554)
Deep in the heart of well, deep in the heart of
Fess Parkers Doubletree Inn on East Beach
in Santa Barbara. This handsome eatery sells
and serves only Prime Grade beef, lamb, veal,
halibut, salmon, lobster and other high-end
victuals. Full bar, plenty of California wines,
elegant surroundings, across from the ocean.
Open for dinner Tuesday through Saturday at
5:30 pm. Reservations suggested on weekends.
Ojai
Maravilla $$$
905 Country Club Road in Ojai (646-1111)
Located at the Ojai Valley Inn & Spa, this
upscale eatery features prime steaks, chops
and fresh seafood. Local farmers provide fresh
produce right off the vine, while herbs are har-
vested from the Inns herb garden. The menu
includes savory favorites like pan seared diver
scallops and braised beef short ribs; dishes are
accented with seasonal vegetables. Open Sun-
day through Thursday for dinner from 5:30 pm
to 9:30 pm, Friday and Saturday from
5:30 pm to 10 pm. MJ
staying at the Cave Lodge
outside of Soppong in the
Thai jungle near the Burmese
border for a few days, deep
in opium country. Christmas
was just over a week away
at the time. There was no
post office, no messenger
service, no meaningful way
to communicate with the
outside world. And email
just doesnt work for some-
thing like this. (Imagine the
barrage of questions from a
hostile gang of tech-savvy
and inquisitive six- and four-year-
old girlsWhy hasnt he responded,
Daddy? or How did you get his
email address, Daddy? or Why dont
we just Skype him, Daddy, like we do
with Grandma and Papa? I may not
be in top form, but Im not walking
into that one.)
Incidentally, the Cave Lodge is a
fantastic place. On the outskirts of a
remote Thai village and surrounded
by beautiful country and a host of
caves, it is a backpacker-type place
consisting of a series of huts on the
Lang River and a lodge that provides
a nice place to relax, with simple but
tasty food and drink. Theres exten-
sive kayaking, trekking and (not sur-
prisingly) caving, and Aussie-owner
John Spies is connected and knowl-
edgeable, having lived in and exten-
sively explored the area for nearly
three decades. John and his wife are
also great hosts, quick with tall tales
about their many (wild) years build-
ing and running the Cave Lodge.
(John has even written a book about
his experience that is great to pick up
and peruse but it is presently only
available at the Lodge.)
We spent one day on a bamboo raft
floating through Tham Lod (Through
Cave) and stopping with our guide
to explore the inner sanctums of what
is a massive and frankly stunning
cave network. The river cave is teem-
ing with fish inside and was a real hit
with the kids. The same evening, we
watched several hundred thousand
swallows circle lower and lower in
the sky, finally flying at mach speed
into Tham Lod at sunset; then we hiked
back through the jungle to the lodge
in the oily darkness. Another day, we
set ourselves up on a secluded rocky
river beach on the Lang and read and
talked and played in the water. (Then
we treated ourselves to a rustic but
fantastic herbal sauna.) Simple, and a
real treat for all of us.
Wendi and I stayed up late one
night on our creaky porch, listening to
the river and the sounds of the jungle
and staring at a close moon and bright
stars. We hadnt talked for some time
when a couple Kongming lanterns
aka sky lanterns, effectively mini-
hot air balloons constructed from rice
paper and wire (for those of you with
young kids, think of the floating lights
in Tangled) floated into view down-
river. They glowed brilliantly against
the night sky.
We turned to each other and smiled.
It turns out that my wife and I think
quite a bit alike.
The next day, Lily and Kate wrote
their note to Santa. That night, just
before bed, we stood on the bank of
the river with our very own sky lan-
tern, waiting for a shift in the warm,
gentle breeze. When it came, we made
a wish and watched as our lantern
floated north, burning brightly, with
the handwritten dreams of two little
girls securely fastened inside.
Peace and love and happy holidays
to everybody. MJ
LEAVING (Continued from page 17)
A sign just outside a Thai campground near Tham Lod, about a
half-mile from Cave Lodge
Lily and Kate sending their note to Santa by way of Thai sky lantern
DIANA PARADISE
PO Box 30040, Santa Barbara, CA 93130
Email: DianaParadise_@hotmail.com
Portfolio Pages: www.DianaParadise.com
Prices start at $3200 for a 24x36 oil portrait of one person.
From Baseball
to Boston Pops
On Entertainment
by Steven Libowitz
Steven Libowitz has
reported on the arts and
entertainment for more
than 30 years; he has
contributed to Montecito
Journal for over ten
years.
I
f his hands were a little faster, his
bat speed a little quicker and/or
his move to frst a little snappier,
Robert Bernhardt might be polishing
relics in a trophy case and enjoying
the spoils of his baseball income
instead of conducting the Santa
Barbara Symphony in its annual New
Years Eve Pops concert. As it turns
out, however, his skills were better
suited to a rectangular concert stage
than a baseball diamond, although his
love for the game remains to this day.
Indeed, even though hitting the twisty
pitch was his ultimate undoing, he
likes to toss a few curves at audiences
by way of programming quirks, as
evidenced by some of the selections
for the concert that are off the base
path if not quite out of left feld.
Bernhardt who would have been
another Bobby B if he made it in
baseball shared his view on Pops
concerts, sports, and rock n roll in
a laugh-filled, self deprecation-sprin-
kled conversation over the phone
from his home in Chattanooga earlier
this month.
Q. This is your first time with the Santa
Barbara Symphony, right?
A. Thats actually a trick question.
It is my first time with the Pops, but
around twenty let me think twen-
ty-five years ago, I did guest conduct
the symphony as part of a conductor
search. That was way back in the day,
in the Jurassic period. I think thats
when they hired Varujan Kojian. I
did love my time with the orchestra,
though. Dont ask them, but I had a
good time (laughs).
So youve forgiven them for not hir-
ing you?
Everything all worked out the way
its supposed to. It was a wonderful
experience and I enjoyed it a lot. Now
Im wondering if any of my old col-
leagues from USC are still there.
Okay then. How did your current con-
nection to Santa Barbara come about?
Recently Ive been working with the
Baltimore Symphony, and there was
a connection with a staffer. My wife
knows Santa Barbara from earlier in
her life, and I do too. What better
place to spend New Year's. And a
chance to do a really fun program.
I couldnt pass that up. I like doing
Pops concerts, especially when I can
make some kind of connection with
the audience. Its a lot of fun for me.
Speaking of fun, I understand that you
played baseball as a youngster and that
you believe that had an influence on you
as a conductor. Care to explain?
I played four years of varsity base-
ball and soccer in Division 2 at Union
College in Schenectady, New York. I
got an invitation to rookie camp with
the Kansas City Royals in Florida.
I was there for a few days and they
suggested I might consider music as
a career.
Do you still follow baseball?
Yeah, actually I do. Despite all the
trials and tribulations of the profes-
sional ranks, I do follow the game. Its
still important. I was a big Dodger fan
for my years in L.A., and I do remain
somewhat loyal to the team that has
been decimated by the owner. But
mostly now I just like great players
in the game... And I get tested for ste-
roids before every concert.
Youve spent a long time at both
Louisville and Chattanooga. How do audi-
ences in the south compare versus other
locations?
Not to be too serious, but in these
cities where Ive had a long run, the
thing that connects it all is that the
audiences have allowed me to be
myself. Its a very natural and com-
fortable thing for me. The connection
to the community and musicians has
to be solid, of course, but the opportu-
nity to not be someone different when
Im on the podium is a real gift. Its
given me a very happy life for quite
some time.
Can you talk about comparing Pops
versus more serious classical concerts?
Ive been doing symphonic music,
opera, pops and education programs
all of them mixed up every year, all
the time, for thirty years. So for me,
its a great joy to be able to move from
Rigoletto to a Beatles concert (with
the Classic Mystery Tour) to a Mahler
symphony to conducting behind Ben
Folds. When I was a kid, I played in a
rock band. I grew up with the music
of the sixties simultaneous with my
awakening to world of classical music.
So its always been part of the same
cloth for me.
So why didnt you pursue rock n roll?
It was just like third base. I wasnt
good enough. No, really, in my early
twenties I stopped doing it actively. I
was a singer-songwriter guitarist, and
wrote some songs. Id been in coffee
houses and clubs, but when I went
to grad school I found where I really
needed to go. But it all becomes part
of who you are, and its been signifi-
cant in terms of influence later on. Im
not playing rock now, but its still hap-
pening to me.
So wait, you still have the songs you
wrote? Do you play them at home?
If they exist anymore, I dont know.
They were wonderful in my memory
and they should stay there so they
stay that way. I do still have my
Martin acoustic, and I play it once in
a while, but I dont have a lot of time.
Okay back to classical music: youve
conducted the Boston Pops, the biggest
and baddest of them all, many times.
I had my first invitation in 1992
from John Williams, who is one of
my heroes. That meant the world. Ive
been going back ever since, and Ive
conducted thirty concerts over the
years. I recently took the Esplanade
Orchestra on a mini-tour of New
England and Ill be there again in May.
Can we talk about the New Years Eve
program? Whats most exciting for you?
Its a combination of a traditional
New Years Eve concert and an espe-
cially American version. So theres
some Strauss, and theres a new suite
of Dimitri Tiomkin music he wrote for
Its a Wonderful Life, which has only
been available for about ten years.
Its somewhat dated but very, very
charming, and ends with singalong
of Auld Lang Syne to end the first
half. We also play Leroy Anderson,
lots of John Williams, an arrange-
ment of the music of Duke Ellington
that has eight or nine of his most
famous melodies in a fantasy. Mila
Daley (the guest soprano) will sing
some operetta and Broadway songs.
Shes trained in both opera and musi-
cal theater and feels really at home
in crossover concerts like this. Were
playing Alan Silvestris music from
Polar Express and were closing with
Williams Olympic fanfare from Seoul
in 1988 its both American goose-
bumpy and international at the same
time. The best aspiration of the human
condition.
Is playing on New Years Eve extra
special?
It is only in that its all celebratory.
For me its just about being fun and
entertaining, and if youll pardon the
champagne analogy, effervescent.
Tickets to the 8:30pm Symphony
Pops concert at the Granada Theatre
on December 31 cost $35-$100. Call
899-2222 or visit www.granadasb.
com
Robert Bernhardt returns to Santa Barbara on
New Years Eve to conduct the Santa Barbara
Symphony at the annual Pops concert at the
Granada
29 December 2011 5 January 2012 MONTECITO JOURNAL 37 A woman begins by resisting a mans advances and ends by blocking his retreat Oscar Wilde
Gloria Kaye, Ph.D.
314 East Carrillo Street, Suite 10
Santa Barbara, California 93101
805-701-0363 or 805-966-6104
drgloriakaye@aol.com
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Helps relieve anxiety and tension
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Pain relief from emotional and
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_
Elin Pye
Picasso Meets Einstein
Museums arent just for art any-
more. At least not here in Santa
Barbara, where the Museum of Art
basically blew apart its staid image
several years ago with the advent of
Nights, the popular happy hour
gatherings that brought lots of folks
to the downtown space for the first
time. More recently, the gallery space
has become a venue for live music and
theater, the latter of which will happen
again next Thursday, January 5, when
Westmont theater professor Mitchell
Thomas directs a dramatic reading of
excerpts from Steve Martins Picasso
at the Lapin Agile, to coincide with
the tail end of the current Picasso
and Braque exhibition. The reading
features an 11-strong cast of talent-
ed Santa Barbara thespians includ-
ing Brian Harwell, Andrew Fromer,
Vicki Finlayson and Jeff Mills in
Martins imaginative fantasy about
a fictional meeting between Einstein
and the painter.
Thomas talked about the piece and
the production recently.
Q. Youre really only performing this
once, at the museum?
A. Yes, but because its a staged
reading its not a fully memorized,
fully staged performance. The actors
will have scripts in hands. There will
only be a couple of rehearsals, and the
whole thing will be fast and dirty...
Its such a language-driven play that
it can be enjoyed in a staged reading
setting. You dont need a lot of move-
ment. The text has a lot of punch to
it without the actors having to do all
that much.
Still, performing in galleries as you
did when you produced and directed
England at the museum and in The Fever
pop-up shows last year what challenges
does that present?
It has more logistical require-
ments. Where does the audience go?
How do they know what to do? In a
normal theater space, there are ritu-
als you follow: get your ticket, pick
up a program, sit down and then the
lights dim. Things shift a bit here,
but its fun for the audience. The
material works on you in a slightly
different way because youre defens-
es arent up the way they normally
might be.
England was a very unsettling,
extremely intimate, challenging piece
of theater, one that opens up huge
difficult questions. This, not so much.
Its a poetic, beautiful play, the what if
in a conversation between and young
Einstein and Picasso. But its much
more funny than an existential mind-
blowing thing. So the plan is to set up
one of the gallery spaces as the Lapin
Agile, which is the bohemian Parisian
bar in 1904 where the play takes place.
The audience comes in, has some
drinks at the bar, mingles around and
then the performance will start.
What to you is the thrust of the play?
It was written in [the mid-1990s]
and when it came out it was described
as a love letter to the twentieth centu-
ry of what truly mattered in the midst
of all that happened. In Steve Martins
opinion, Picasso and Einstein were
two of the most important parts of the
century not just as individuals, but
also what they represented. Theres
a line in the play that talks about the
pen of the artist, the line of the musi-
cian and the theory of the mathemati-
cian in transforming what it means to
be human.
Now, were looking back at first
decade of twenty-first century,
which has been kind of mind-bog-
gling already. Even in the last year
alone, the Arab Spring, the Tea Party,
Obamacare, social security being chal-
lenged its an interesting moment
to stop and think what our century
will be. If Picasso and Einstein were
two of the greatest contributors of last
century, who do we have? Any play
that opens you up to asking those
questions about your culture and the
world is worth doing again and again,
even if its been presented in town
before.
Speaking of the culture, Westmont
has become quite the theater spot in
recent years, not just the quiet little
Christian college up in the hills.
There is a lot going on, especially in
the arts. We have the new arts center,
a fantastic twenty-first century facility
and now theres a new black box space
available for us in our own theater
complex... People do have some ideas
about us. My goal as chairman of the
department is to help theater bring
people together, like gathering around
the campfire and sharing our sto-
ries, finding our commonalities rather
than our differences. Great stories are
for everyone, Christian or atheist or
whatever your views might be. So I do
hope we do have a big impact on the
community.
Picasso at the Lapin Agile will be
performed at 5:30pm on January 5,
2012. Admission is free with admis-
sion to the museum; limited to 60.
Call 963-4364 or visit www.sbmuse
art.org
Very SBIFF-y
The folks over at the Santa Barbara
International Film Festival are usual-
ly quite tight-lipped about the actual
film presentations until well after
New Year's, but the opening night
film had already been posted on the
website by mid-December, and it
looks to be a real winner. The 27th
annual fest will debut on January 26
with the world premiere of Darling
Companion, the latest from writer-
director Lawrence Kasdan, whose
resume includes big-budget block-
busters like Star Wars: Episode
VI - Return of the Jedi, Raiders of
the Lost Ark and The Bodyguard
(as writer only) as well as nifty
indie-style films that he both wrote
and directed such as The Big Chill,
Mumford, Body Heat and Grand
Canyon. Darling Companion stars
Diane Keaton, Kevin Kline, Dianne
Wiest, Richard Jenkins, Sam Shepard
and Elisabeth Moss. The film is being
released by Sony Pictures Classic,
so this is a pretty sizable coup and
might very well be the doing of new
SBIFF president Douglas R. Stone,
a Montecito resident whose compa-
nies represent talent, producers and
films. Bodes well for the future. MJ
Mitchell Thomas directs a dramatic reading of
excerpts from Steve Martins Picasso at the Lapin
Agile at the Museum of Art
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What events are mentioned in the community calendar?

What real estate listings are included?

Our Town

Concerts at MUS, Elmo, and the YMCA

Buttons and Bows, a popular tune

Its that time of year again, one

MISCELLANy (Continued from page 18)

Broker Specialist In Birnam Wood

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