LIFE COPING STRATEGIES

1. Involvement in religious activities as a coping strategy

a. Attending religious worship in church
b. Praying and communing with God
c. Singing praises to God
d. Building faith and hope in God
e. Having genuine repentance to free oneself from the sense of guilt.

2. Formation of families and close friendship as a coping strategy

a. Forming and relying on caring relationships of family members for love
b. Relying on family members for resolution of conflicts in life.
c. Relying on family members in life for protection.
d. Deriving a sense of belonging from family members in life
e. Relying on family members for good feeding
f. Sharing feelings/problems with family members
g. Re-assessing and re-defining one’s situation with the help of family members
h. Relying on caring relationship of friends for love
i. Relying on friends/mentors for resolution of conflicts in life
j. Relying on friends/mentors in life for protection.
k. Deriving a sense of belonging from a friendships/mentorships in life
l. Relying on friends/mentors for extra feeding
m. Sharing feelings/problems with friends/mentors
n. Re-assessing and re-defining one’s situation with the help of friends/mentors

3. Involvement in educational, work, development and other programmes as coping strategy

a. Engaging intensively in educational, work and other personal development programmes to
keep oneself busy
b. Engaging in therapeutic rehabilitation programmes to learn how to cope with one’s
challenges.
c. Learning vocational skills and engaging in positive recreational activities in order to be
appropriately occupied and escape boredom.
d. Engaging in educational, vocational and entrepreneurship training to be self-employed or be
employed

4. Emotion-focused strategy as a coping strategy

a. Consoling oneself
b. Engaging in self-pity
c. Withdrawing into oneself
d. Accepting one’s fate/destiny

5. Engagement in aggressive and self destructive behaviours as a coping strategy

a. Dominating others through physical, social, psychological, financial, and spiritual abuse
b. Dominating others through verbal aggression
c. Intimidating others
d. Being insensitive and aggressive to others’ needs and feelings
e. Being uncooperative with others
f. Engaging and indulging in self destructive behaviours
g. Not dealing with character flaws
h. Engaging in criminal activities and behaviours

6. Contact with family members/friends as a coping strategy

a. Receiving visitors/family members.
b. Contacting one’s family/ friends with cellphones and other ICT facilities.
The Case for Action: The Need for a Personal Strategy
1. We must live life on earth: we can’t avoid life and responsibilities;
2. We are only given time, space and choice: the rest is for us to determine and do;
3. All of us struggle with life: passage of time and what it means to us: SIAP-significance, identity,
acceptance and purpose;
4. To determine the next steps: Life should (must) be lived by design; not from crisis to crisis.
o Clarify you values;
o Create your personal vision and mission statements;
o Do a SWOT analysis to strengthen personal skills;
o Determine your area of excellence and purpose.
5. We must take the challenge of life: Live in the real world and be the subject of life itself. To
conquer fear is the beginning of wisdom;
6. We need courage: Courage is the greatest of virtues, because if you haven’t got it, you may not
have opportunity to use others;
7. We need to pursue and give ourselves treatment, recovery and hope; not chasing things and
vanity-something to tether us to reality;
8. We need to facilitate, sustain, guide and protect our wishes for self, partner/spouse and family;
9. We need to prepare the next generations to take our places and spaces;
10. We need to meet God’s expectations of man:
o God expects man to FEAR HIM AND OBEY HIM- Eccl. 12:13
o God expects man to PLACE HIS TRUST IN HIM- Psalm 4:5
o God expects man to LOVE HIM- 1 John 4:19
o God expects man to be OBEDIENT TO HIS WILL- Revelation 22:14
o God expects man to DESIRE HIM- Psalm 27:4
o God expects man’s EXCLUSIVE DEVOTION- Matthew 4:10
o God expects man’s PRAISE AND DEVOTION- Psalm 100:4
o God expects man to WORSHIP HIM- John 4:21-24
o God expects man to be HIS SERVANTS- Rom. 6:16-18, 22
o God expects man’s PRAYERS TO BE ADDRESSED TO HIM- Matthew 6:9
―He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good; and what doth the LORD require of thee, but to do justly,
and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God?‖ Micah 6:8
11. We will be at some point looking to make a step change in our career and life;
12. When we feel our life is misaligned/unbalanced with who we are and want to be on the surface of
life;
13. When we have defined substantive, life-changing goals and feel having a personal strategy will
help us most quickly achieve such goals;
14. When we are unhappy with current condition and are looking to reengineer self, family and life;
15. When there is increased global competition for resources (e.g.jobs) and we want to establish a
personal competitive advantage over others;
16. When the world is changing at an ever rapid pace and we want to be ahead of change; want to
adapt quickly and adequately to change.
 RECOVERY
You can’t have an understanding of an issue until you consider the evidence supporting that issue!
The eyes can only see what the mind has been prepared to comprehend!
If you put knowledge on people and they accept it, it becomes their reality!
We access knowledge pertinent to our reality!

1. Have a proper structure-Christ being the Head;

2. Establishment and Regularization of the structure-(consistency);
3. Develop and enforce godly and healthy boundary areas in life. We all need boundaries because
the environment is full of temptations;
4. Implementation of the arising resolutions as the way forward;
5. Eliminate structural confusions;
6. Live by standards, not comparisons;
7. Introduce godly reforms that will have a lasting impact: reforms that will stand the test of time
and generations;
8. Work for self and family, and with the family (or ―group‖);
9. Develop and foster a sense of belonging and ownership, (i.e. ―I feel at home here‖);
10. Perpetually (endlessly) seek to improve and grow as individuals and as a unit in all aspects of
your life base on SMART goals;
11. Develop and maintain trust. Trust is the most important thing; where there is trust, a lot is
accomplished.
12. Delegate:
 Assign mutual responsibility
 Give authority-the right to issue valid instructions and directions
 Create accountability-requirements of them fulfilling their obligations for
achieving/producing results.
13. Commit to IMPLEMENTATION! IMPLEMENTATION! IMPLEMENTATION! Without
implementation, it doesn’t matter how good a structure/system is!!! The status quo is maintained
or things get worse. (It’s the structure that holds the system up, but it’s doctrine that holds the
structure up. Get the doctrine right and you will get the structure right.)
14. What makes a system effective is:
a. Fear of God;
b. People of integrity;
c. Knowledge/information;
d. Vision: clarity of purpose;
e. Commitment to the vision;
f. Honesty/fairness;
g. Teamwork;
15. The 10 Commandments: The conditionality of God is that if you do your ―IFS‖, God has no
choice but to do what He has promised (at His timing) because He is faithful.

You’ve Got to Have a Plan:

1. Methods will vary
2. People are always the priority: live and let live
3. Begin small
4. Unity: stay together
5. Follow the process: allow time/give them time
6. Meetings: to put the minds together. Read from the same script
7. Expect something from each party involved: firm boundaries and clarify clear expectations
8. Keep going/keep them going
9. Burdens: get help for your burdens/help them carry their burdens
10. Carry on/let them carry on
11. To obey is to learn: supreme obedience is interpreted as the expression of love.
12. Spiritual experience above all else
13. THE PRICE OF VICTORY COMES HIGH!-IT’S NOT GOING TO BE EASY!
 WHAT MUST BE ABLE TO HAPPEN AT HOME
1. Getting along-If you get along, they’ll go along.
2. Purpose: Something to live for; otherwise you’ll end up obsessing on what’s wrong with you.
3. Vision: Without a vision, you live your life focusing on negative thoughts and them guiding you!
4. Structure: Enablement to do the right thing before one has to choose
5. Communication: with its consolidation the relationship lives on, without it the relationship dies!
6. Initiative
7. Love-speaking to each other’s hearts.
8. Nurture: bringing the best out of each other
9. Order/direction/clarity
10. Purity
11. Duty
12. Freedom/liberty of conscience
13. Chores
14. Cleaning
15. Rest
16. Respect
17. Dignity
18. Fun
19. Diet-healthy cooking and eating
20. Romance
21. Worship
22. Parenting
23. Greatness: Self Awareness; Self-Acceptance; Self-Development; Self-Management; Decision
Making; Aloneness; Belonging; Purpose- (marriage & life mission)

NO CAPACITY=INABILITY
The eyes can only see what the mind has been prepared to comprehend.
A. Comprehension is directly linked and proportional to ability: you can only do that which you
know.
LEVELS OF AWARENESS;
4. Liberating
3. Reforming
2. Awakening
1. Closed and broken
B. PROVISION: THE PRACTICALITIES OF LIFE
C. STRUCTURE
Living by design VS living from crisis to crisis
DESIGN: Routine
CRISIS TO CRISIS: Thoughtlessness and scatterbrained
D. DOCTRINE: Godly VS Ungodly
Life’s motive: Pleasure VS Excellence
Predominant philosophy-Life’s driver-Direction of life-Destiny! (YOUR CHOICE!)
THE BIG QUESTION: WHAT’S LIFE PURPOSE?
a. Who am I?
b. Where did I come from?
c. What am I on earth for?
d. Where am I going afterlife here on earth?
WHEN YOU ANSWER THE ABOVE QUESTIONS, THEN YOU WILL START LIVING AN
EXAMINED LIFE!
LEVELS OF SPIRITUAL GROWTH
1. FAITH
2. OBEDIENCE
3. PLEASING TO GOD

LIFE IS LIVED IN THE TRENCHES OF DAILY ROUTINE!

WHAT’S YOUR ROUTINE AND WHAT ARE YOUR PRIORITIES IN LIVING A LIFE PLEASING
TO GOD?

MASLOW’S HIERACHY OF NEEDS:

In terms of psychology, Maslow is the path. Maslow asks us to throw ourselves into what is meaningful
for us. He asks us to concentrate on it fully and let it totally absorb you. Instead of worrying about safety
issues which produces fear, get in the habit of making choices that promote growth.
Maslow’s Self-actualization does not talk about spirituality directly. We need the guidance, the love and
the knowledge provided through faith in God.
So, from a Godly perspective, the proper order should be:
1. God
2. Self-esteem
3. Love and acceptance
4. Security and assurance
5. Physical needs.

CONCLUSION:
In your life, you should:
 Be authentic.
 Transcend your cultural conditioning, limitations and bindings, and become a universal citizen.
 Find your vocation and right mate.
 Know that life is precious.
 Be good and joyous in all kinds of situations.
 Learn from your inner nature.
 See that basic needs are satisfied.
 Refresh your consciousness; appreciate beauty and other good things in life.
 Understand that controls are good, and complete abandon is bad.
 Transcend trifling problems
 Grapple with serious problems such as injustice, pain suffering and death
 Be good choosers
 Have practice in making choices, and allowing choices in your religious beliefs.
 REHABILITATION PROCESS
(RECOVERY, HEALING, REVIVAL, RESTORATION.)

1. AWARENESS STAGE: The seed you plant today determines your harvest tomorrow! IF
YOU DON’T LIKE THE HARVEST, CHANGE THE SEED. (SEED = MINDSET )
2. INTERVENTION-(Bio-Psycho-Social-Spiritual Model)
i. Duration: 90-180 days; review to determine extension before 90 days.
ii. Stages Of Recovery Explanation
3. ASSESSMENTS
a. ATP Step 1: Screening, Intake, and Stabilization
 Client Intake and Life History Assessment Form;
 Initial Clinical Assessment (within 14 days of admission);
 Residential Treatment for Men and Women.
b. ATP Step 1: Psychiatric Review (within 10 days of admission);
c. ATP Step 2: Presenting Problem Analysis
d. ATP Step 3: Life and Addiction History
e. ATP Step 4: Recovery and Relapse History
f. ATP Step 5: Assessment Profile
g. ATP Step 6: Final Problem List
h. ATP Step 7: Diagnostic Presentation
i. ATP Step 8: Comprehensive Treatment Plan Development
j. ATP Step 9: Denial Management counseling
4. IMPLEMENTING TREATMENT PLAN
5. FAMILY MANAGEMENT/TREATMENT-WORKING WITH THE FAMILY
IMPACT OF ―ILLNESS‖ ON FAMILIES
 Understanding Denial
 Understanding Stigma
 Understanding Frustration, Helplessness, and Anxiety
 Understanding Exhaustion and Burnout
 Understanding Grief
 Understanding the need for Personal time and to Develop Personal Resources
 Understanding the Effect of Inappropriate Professional Assistance
6. DISCHARGE PLANNING
7. RE-INTERGRATION INTO SOCIETY
8. AFTERCARE/FOLLOW-UP
9. SAMPLE CURRICULLUM
 SAMPLE CURRICULLUM
THE GOALS OF THE THERAPY PROGRAM ERS 8—12-Step Sayings
1. Learning about recovery and what it can
mean for you Relapse Prevention Sessions
2. Making the best use of your mental and RP 1—Alcohol
physical health services RP 2—Boredom
3. Learning how mental health and physical RP 3A—Avoiding Relapse Drift
wellness will help you to achieve your goals RP 3B—Mooring Lines Recovery Chart
and support your personal recovery RP 4—Work and Recovery
4. Staying well by decreasing symptoms of a RP 5—Guilt and Shame
mental health problem RP 6—Staying Busy
5. Learning how to manage day-to-day stress RP 7—Motivation for Recovery
and prevent relapse RP 8—Truthfulness
6. Staying well by connecting with others. RP 9—Total Abstinence
7. Staying well by living a healthy lifestyle RP 10—Sex and Recovery
8. Recognizing and building on your RP 11—Anticipating and Preventing Relapse
cultural/spiritual values and experiences to RP 12—Trust
support your personal recovery RP 13—Be Smart, Not Strong
9. Living an active productive life. RP 14—Defining Spirituality
Intake/Admission RP 15—Managing Life; Managing Money
I/A 1—Welcome Note RP 16—Relapse Justification I
I/A 2—TH-Rehabilitation Process Explanation RP 17—Taking Care of Yourself
I/A 3—Intake Process Explanation RP 18—Emotional Triggers
I/A 4—denial Management Counseling RP 19—Illness
RP 20—Recognizing Stress
Individual/Conjoint Sessions RP 21—Relapse Justification II
IC 1—Working alliance RP 22—Reducing Stress
IC 2A—Recovery Checklist RP 23—Managing Anger
IC 2B—Relapse Analysis Chart RP 24—Acceptance
IC 3A—Treatment Evaluation RP 25—Making New Friends
IC 3B—Continuing Treatment Plan RP 26—Repairing Relationships
RP 27—Serenity Prayer
Early Recovery Skills Sessions RP 28—Compulsive Behaviors
SCH 1—The Importance of Scheduling RP 29—Coping with Feelings and Depression
SCH 2—Daily/Hourly Schedule RP 30—12-Step Programs
CAL 1—Marking Progress RP 31—Looking Forward; Managing Downtime
CAL 2—Calendar RP 32—One Day at a Time
ERS 1A—Triggers RP 33—Drug Dreams During Recovery
ERS 1B—Trigger–Thought–Craving–Use RP Elective A—Client Status Review
ERS 1C—Thought-Stopping Techniques RP Elective B—Holidays and Recovery
ERS 2A—External Trigger Questionnaire RP Elective C—Recreational Activities
ERS 2B—External Trigger Chart
ERS 3A—Internal Trigger Questionnaire LIFESTYLE CHANGE: MENTAL FREEDOM
ERS 3B—Internal Trigger Chart The 8 keys:
ERS 4A—12-Step Introduction 1. Right Thinking
ERS 4B—The Serenity Prayer and the 12 Steps of 2. Heal Feelings
Alcoholics Anonymous 3. A No-Fail Environment
ERS 5—Roadmap for Recovery 4. Self-Mastery/Self Awareness
ERS 6A—Five Common Challenges in Early 5. Informed Choices
Recovery 6. Intentional Behaviour
ERS 6B—Alcohol Arguments 7. Your Circle Of Support
ERS 7A—Thoughts, Emotions, and Behavior 8. Spirituality
ERS 7B—Addictive Behavior
The Stages
Withdrawal Stage (1 to 2 weeks)
During the first days after substance use is stopped, some people experience difficult symptoms.
The extent of the symptoms often is related to the amount, frequency, and type of their previous
substance use.
For people who use stimulants, withdrawal can be accompanied by drug craving, depression, low
energy, difficulty sleeping or excessive sleep, increased appetite, and difficulty concentrating.
Although people who use stimulants do not experience the same degree of physical symptoms as
do people who use alcohol, the psychological symptoms of craving and depression can be quite
severe. Clients may have trouble coping with stress and may be irritable.

Early Abstinence (4 weeks; follows Withdrawal)

For people who used stimulants, this 4-week period is called the Honeymoon. Most people feel
quite good during this period and often feel ―cured.‖ As a result, clients may want to drop out of
treatment or stop attending 12-Step meetings during the Honeymoon period. Early abstinence
should be used as an opportunity to establish a good foundation for recovery. If clients can direct
the energy, enthusiasm, and optimism felt during this period into recovery activities, they can lay
the foundation for future success.

Protracted Abstinence (3.5 months; follows Early Abstinence)

From 6 weeks to 5 months after clients stop using, they may experience a variety of annoying
and troublesome symptoms. These symptoms—difficulties with thoughts and feelings—are
caused by the continuing healing process in the brain. This period is called the Wall. It is
important for clients to be aware that some of the feelings during this period are the result of
changes in brain chemistry. If clients remain abstinent, the feelings will pass. The most common
symptoms are depression, irritability, difficulty concentrating, low energy, and a general lack of
enthusiasm. Clients also may experience strong cravings during protracted abstinence. Relapse
risk goes up during this period. Clients must stay focused on remaining abstinent one day at a
time. Exercise helps tremendously during this period. For most clients, completing this phase in
recovery is a major achievement. This may also be a high risk period for those in substance use
recovery to fall into developing a behavioral addiction.

Readjustment (2 months; follows Protracted Abstinence)

After 5 months, the brain has recovered substantially. Now, the client’s main task is developing a
life that has fulfilling activities that support continued recovery. Although a difficult part of
recovery is over, hard work is needed to improve the quality of life.
Because cravings occur less often and feel less intense 6 months into recovery, clients may be
less aware of relapse risk and put themselves in high-risk situations and increase their relapse
risk.