How to manage yourself ?

The scientific approach

 INDEX
1.WHY SHOULD YOU MANAGE
YOURSELF?

2.TIME MANAGEMENT

3.GOAL SETTING

4.MONEY MANAGEMENT

5.INTERPERSONAL RELATIONS
6.COMMUNICATION
7.GROUP DYNAMICS
8. LEARNING
9.CRISIS MANAGEMENT
10.HEALTH MANAGEMENT
11.SELF ESTEEM
 INDEX( CONTD..)
12.SPIRITUAL ASPECTS
13.POSITIVE THINKING
14.DECISION MAKING
15.WORK LIFE BALANCE
16. NOTE ON GOOD MANNERS
ANNEXURE - REFERENCE BOOKS TO
READ
 1. WHY SHOULD YOU MANAGE
YOURSELF?

We live in a world where we are

not taught one important thing- how
to live inspite of all the modern
gadgets and scientific knowledge.
We acquire our thinking, feeling,
behaviour from the surroundings and
also our natural tendencies.
We develop habits, behaviour
patterns and a strong
justification that we are
right. In the end, we end up
being unhappy, angry,
dissatisfied and also make
others unhappy.
 We do not examine the very fibre on which
our life is woven. We waste time, money,
energy, run after illusory happiness.
We neglect health and family
relationships, measure success with the
yardstick of others, and run after it. We
feel isolated, nobody understands me,
type of thinking.
All this need not be so our
approach can be reviewed and set right.

We have approach life
systematically. Enjoy life, be happy,
achieve success, grow everyday and also
help others to find their happiness.
Let us see how this can be done. Let

us explore.
An un examined life is not worth

living.
 2. TIME MANAGEMENT
What is time?
The importance of time

How to plan time?

How to keep track of your time?

How to use time effectively?

 To do list
Prioritising works to be done
Delegating to others
Phone & cell phone
Internet
 Travel time can be productively
used
Meetings and time management

Newspaper /TV

Procrastination
 TO DO LIST

Sl Activity Due Completed Remarks

No Date on
3. GOAL SETTING
Aim in life
Focus on the few

Aim at peace for life time

Top 10 goals in life. write down

Magic of believing

Picturise that you have already

attained your goal

Tips : GOAL SETTING
1.Put The List Of Your Goals Where
You Can See Them Daily
2.Frequently Think About Your
Goals
3.Use Your Imagination. Visualize
4.Be Realistic About The Obstacles
You May Face
5.What Specific Action Steps Will
You Take And When?
6.What Are The Resources
Needed?
7.Discuss Your Goal In Your Small
Circle
TOP TEN GOALS IN MY LIFE
NAME:

Sl Goal Indicator of Due Remarks

No success date
 4. MONEY MANAGEMENT

Value of money in life

Cash flow
Savings
Investments
Live below your means
Spend some money on charity e.g.
tithing
Learn the secret of compound
interest
5. INTERPERSONAL RELATIONS
Positive or Negative
Dealing with difficult people
How to make friends
Strength of network
Do not look for people without defects
Assertiveness
Networking
 Anticipate your bosss needs.

Learn your bosss goals and objectives

Give clear and brief reports.

Be sensitive to their needs.

Be honest with the boss.

TIPS :
How to Reduce Interpersonal
conflict.
1. Dont Be Surprised At Disagreement Or Conflict.
Very Often This Can Be Productive

2. Interpersonal Conflict Is Best Confronted, Not

Smoothed Over, Denied Or Runaway From.
3. Do Not Raise The Flag Of Personality Conflict.
Share Expectations With One Another First
4. Beware Of The Self-Fulfilling Prophecy.
5. When We Are Annoyed With A Colleague, It Is
Often Better To Express That Annoyance
Appropriately.
 TIPS
Assertiveness
1.Assertiveness is expressing yourself clearly in away which
does not violate the rights of others but respects your own
2. Submissiveness and aggressiveness both create negative
feelings
3. Skills
a. look at the person directly in the eye ,not below

b. speak in a form positive tone

c. keep your body straight shoulders back, head up

d. express yourself clearly without using any offensive

language
6. COMMUNICATION
 1. LISTENING
Focus on the speaker
Try to understand the view point of the
speaker
Do not assume, listen actively
Ask clarification when you need to

2. SPEAKING
Speak in short sentences
Do not overwhelm the recipient
Maintain eye contact
Keep the communication interactive
Ask for feedback
 3. WRITING
Keep your communication simple
Edit what you write
Always check spelling and grammar
Get confirmation
4. READING

Reading as a part of work

Self learning
5. BODY LANGUAGE

Pay attention to verbal

communication
6.1 Listening skills
 HEARING IS NOT LISTENING

Eye Contact : Eye contact enhances

communication
Posture: Show interest and move forward
to the speaker
Gestures: Nodding, raising your eye brows
etc will enhance the speakers sense of
being heard and accepted
Paraphrasing : Restate the speakers
thought but in fewer words
6.2 HOW TO ANSWER THE
TELEPHONE

DO
identify yourself and your organisation
be prepared
be tactful
be helpful
stop talking when you are not saying
anything
note down points while talking
pass on the message to the concerned
persons
 DONT

shout or get too close to the

receiver
say hello
talk to anyone else while you are
on the phone call
forget to say thank you
 7. GROUP DYNAMICS

Group behaviour
Envy
Mob behaviour
Politics
in office/
job/family
managing meetings
various types of people we see in life
 7.1 TIPS FOR SUPERVISORS

Know yourself. Know your people.

Know when to make decision yourself and
when to ask for help from the group.
Keep cool.
Be concerned about your task and your people.
Be fair.
 8. LEARNING
Keeping oneself well informed about his/her profession and the
current trends in the society.
Lifelong learning
Reading at least 1 hour a day
Use the internet
 What9. CRISIS MANAGEMENT
types of crisis can occur?
Conflicts on the job, in the family
How to deal with them?
How to prepare?
How to prevent?
How to manage?
Coping skills
 Tips Grace under
Pressure
1.Develop A Sense Of Humour.
2.Make Hospital Visiting A Habit.
3.Make It A Practice To Talk To The Less
Privileged.
4.Do Things For Other People.
5.Look For Causes Of Stress.
6.Examine Your Relationships.

7.Do One Thing At A Time.

8.Dont Become A Workaholic.

9.Pace Yourself.

10.Create A Quiet Place To Meditate And Pray.

10. HEALTH MANAGEMENT
 Food

Exercise

Weight control

Above the age of 40 , what to be careful

about

Health insurance
 11. SELF ESTEEM

Do you care what others say?

The ultimate freedom

Choose to concentrate on the essentials

Do not degrade yourself
 12. SPIRITUAL ASPECTS

Nigerian values

The certainty of death

What do you want to leave as your

legacy?
 13. POSITIVE THINKING

Dont limit yourself because God has not

limited you

Imbibe the i can do it spirit

Inspire yourself
 14. DECISION MAKING
Separate the essential

What is desirable may not be really important?

Speed of decision making

Never decide in haste

Job change
Marriage
Purchasing land/house
 14.1 Make A Decision
1.Write the objectives and any limits, or boundaries.

2.Indicate the decisions objectives and boundaries.

3.Separate the essential from the desirable.

4.Allot weightage for the desirable.

5.Generate alternatives.
6.Check alternatives for basic eligibility.

7.Compare each alternative against the basic eligibility.

8.Total the scores

9.Check to see if there are any adverse consequences

regarding the alternative with the highest total.

10.Decide.
 15. WORK LIFE BALANCE

Everybody needs to have their own balance. And the balance is a

function of one's priorities. For me, my highest priority is being
engaged with my family, which means the relationship that I
have with my wife and children. The relationship that I have
with my siblings, and my parents, and there are other people
that I am not related to. My closest friends and quality
relationships that as an adult with children take a lot of time
and effort to maintain.
.
And you can only have very few of those relationships. And
the ones you do have deserve a lot of effort and attention.
And you know, that is really, to me, what creates quality of
life. And then there has to be something else that you do on
the side. Otherwise you know, too much of one thing and
you probably go crazy. And there is the physiological and
economic requirement of working so you can earn money,
so you can have a roof over your head and provide for your
family. And then there is the next step, which is you like to
go on ski vacations, and drive station wagons. And send
your children to college. And those kinds of things.
And then you want to have enough resources to
contribute to your community and to society at large,
et cetera. And I think that everybody has a different
balance. I'm very fortunate because we have an office
here in New York City.
But we also have an office in the suburbs, where we
work. Some of the senior people here live in
Westchester, Fairfield County. And we work up there
on Mondays, and often on Fridays. We are all very
engaged with our families. In fact, all of the senior
folks here have little children. So we are all in the
same boat. And you know, many people, I mean we
are working all the time
But you know, I find for example you know. I go to ballet
recitals. And I get to take my children to gymnastics you
know class and Tumblebugs and stuff like that because
part of being an entrepreneur is designing your life. And so
we have been fortunate enough to design the life exactly
the way we want it, which includes an office with five
minutes of out houses
An office that is one block from Grand Central, which is
the line we take to commute to New York City. Because
when you get on the train at 6:36, and you see the high
heels and the ties, and the briefcases, and the million
dollar frowns when you have to you know, trudge into New
York City on a cold February morning, or a hot July
morning, go to Grand Central, and then take a subway
downtown, and then fight it out all day. And then not get
home until your children are sleeping. I mean, that is not
a lifestyle that is interesting to me personally.
 .

Because you can't generate a lot of happiness out of that.

But some people do, frankly. And some people don't share
my sentiment about being home and being engaged with
their children. So I think it is just a personal issue. And for
me, my family comes first. And there are also a lot of other
things that I like to do. I play a lot of sports. My wife and I
like to travel. We like to do lots of things.

And there is always a tremendous amount of pressure on

one's time. So managing that time, and being able to
multitask is a key ingredient to my own personal, and
emotional, and professional balance and success.
DANIEL STEIN PRESIDENT jds CAPITAL
 16. A NOTE ON GOOD MANNERS
1.Greet anybody you meet according to the time of the day.

2.Say thank you when somebody offers you something.

3.If you decline the offer say no thanks.

4. Be polite. Use the word please wherever required and it

costs you nothing

5.Say excuse me when you are likely to disturb/offend.

6.Whenever you feel that you have made mistake say sorry even if it is to
your juniors.

7.When you use common facilities like wash basin, dining table, toilet ,
common newspaper leave it as neat as you would like to have it, if you
are the next user.(especially in public places)

8. When you are eating with others, start eating only after everybody has
been served in the table in which you are sitting.

9.Do not talk with your mouth full while you are eating.

10.Do not speak to others near you while you are on the phone with
somebody else.
11.Be considerate to others. Try to understand their viewpoint. You
need not accept it. But try to understand.

12.Be punctual. Dont make others wait for you.

13.Honour all commitments you make. Deliver what you promise.

14.When you are the host offer refreshment/food to your visitors as

appropriate.
 ANNEXURE: REFERENCE BOOKS
TO READ
Sl no Title Author Remarks
1. Think and grow rich Napoleon The power of
Hill the
subconscious
mind
2. How to win friends and influence Dale Building
people Carnegie relationships
3. The power of positive thinking Norman Positive
Vincent achievers
Peale
4. The seven habits of highly Stephen Time tested
effective people Covey habits for
personal
success
5. What they dont each you at Mark H Street smart
Harvard business school McCormack business tips
6. Mans search for meaning Victor Man can live
Frankl any how if
there is a why
7. Body Language Sue & Alan Body language
Pease Fundamentals

8. The monk who sold his Ferrari Robin Personal

Sharma development
 SUPPORT
For a three month period from the date of training, the
participants can call up and discuss with the trainer about
their personal development issues
Mob: 98470 41681
morningcool@gmail.com
The participants can meet among themselves and form a
support group