What They Don’T Teach You in Sales School: Sales 101

WHAT THEY DON’T TEACH YOU

IN SALES SCHOOL

SALES 101

TONY REA

iUniverse LLC

Bloomington

What They Don’t Teach You in Sales School

Sales 101

Copyright © 2013 by Tony Rea.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

iUniverse books may be ordered through booksellers or by contacting:

iUniverse LLC

1663 Liberty Drive

Bloomington, IN 47403

www.iuniverse.com

1-800-Authors (1-800-288-4677)

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

ISBN: 978-1-4759-9375-2 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4759-9376-9 (ebk)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2013910218

iUniverse rev. date: 07/11/2013

CONTENTS

Preface

Introduction: The Conscious and Unconscious Person

Chapter One: Grooming

Chapter Two: Getting Started In Sales

Chapter Three: Meetings

Chapter Four: Basic Sales Skills

Chapter Five: Facing the Customer

Chapter Six: Necessary Busy Work

Chapter Seven: Productivity

Chapter Eight: Getting Better At Selling

Chapter Nine: More Tips on Social Interaction

Chapter Ten: Character

A Basic List of Good Advice

To my father, Tony, who deeply inspired me

to appreciate what it takes to be a true salesperson.

Preface

We are all salespeople, whether we know it or not. If you talk to people, you sell. If you ask for something, inquire how someone is doing, or try to influence someone to make a decision, you are selling yourself, your wishes, or your opinions. We do this every day of our lives but are mostly unaware of it as a distinct process.

Some people do it better than others. Others learn how to do it over time. People who have good personal skills can sell. Developing sales skills can make you more comfortable around people and, in doing so, help you become a better person. Even if you don’t think you understand what selling is, you really do know how to sell. You’re just not consciously aware there is a process to follow.

Why don’t high schools and colleges teach sales? Some have curricula on sales, but there is a glaring lack of these studies in most educational institutions. Most people who get into sales have a background in something else—business, psychology, sociology, teaching. They all have one thing in common: good interpersonal skills.

But don’t think you can’t be a good salesperson if you haven’t studied it. One of the greatest things about a career in sales is that it’s truly based on performance. It’s one of the few careers where politics is important, but producing results is tops. If you can produce results, that’s 99 percent of the game.

What you need the most is practical advice, the kind you can only get on the job. I wrote this book because I didn’t think there was any compendium of business and sales topics that offered simple guidance and explanations. Looking back, it would have been valuable to me to have a book like this when I started my first job as a salesperson.

This book is a go-to reference for advice on situations, business taxonomy, politics, and basic rules of the sales life. Consult it to get creative ideas, seek advice on a dilemma, or discover something you didn’t know before. Much of this stuff will be handy to the person who is learning about sales and the sales environment. Some people will find the information to be useful in life as well as sales. This is no coincidence. Sales have taught me many great lessons about life. I consider the two inseparable.

I want to mention that this subject is limitless in its depth. I could write forever about sales. Maybe I will. I make no claims that this book is definitive on all sales subjects. I tried to cover as many topics as I could, but in reality, I think about more to add every day. So if you have ideas, let me know what they are. Send feedback to my website at salestony.com.

Almost all of the examples are from actual situations I personally experienced. I left out names of people and companies intentionally, just because some of the situations are not very flattering. The point of illustrating these things is to help you understand something better. Mentioning names only adds needless distraction.

In the text, I refer to customers and factory people. Factory people are the ones you deal with in your company. Customers are the people you do business with outside of your company. The word factory may give the impression of a big company, but in the context of this book, it means any size company, public or private, small or large.

One of the most important skills of a good salesperson is the ability to understand how people will behave. This comes in handy when you need to understand how someone will react to a given situation. Knowing how the customer will respond helps you to fine-tune your persuasion. Chances are, if you’re in sales now or are thinking about it, you have an innate ability already.

The idea that every person has two personalities—conscious and unconscious—is something that most salespeople do not understand. I’ve added an introduction just for the purpose of presenting this concept. Though it may be controversial, my real-life experience has shown me that there is something to it. Understanding this duality helps you see more deeply into motivations and behavior.

The introduction is a mixture of my personal experience and education in psychology. It does not represent the current thinking in psychology, only my opinion of what works for me and what I think will work for you. If you can improve your ability to understand people, why not do it?

There are great salespeople and there are salespeople who have the potential to be great. This book is for both.

Introduction

The Conscious and Unconscious Person

Every person you deal with—customer, friend, relative, lover, wife, whoever—has two distinct personalities. They are two people. We can call these two beings the conscious person and the unconscious person.

The conscious person is easy to read. You can see and hear the conscious person directly. This is what you, as a person, are conscious of, what you perceive as reality. What you are thinking right now is the conscious you. The conscious person can articulate why he or she does most things. Conscious persons have the perception they are in touch with what and why they do things. This is true most of the time.

However, there are times when people can’t tell you why they did something. More interestingly, they may not even be aware they are doing something in the first place. The unconscious person is someone who you, as a person, are not aware of, but it is contained within your personality.

There is linkage between the conscious and unconscious person. Feelings are one of those links. There are indicators, but most are transparent to the conscious person because he or she doesn’t know how to read them. You can’t see what the unconscious you is thinking. The unconscious influences the conscious by making us do things or feel things for reasons we may not realize. Just as you are aware of what you’re thinking, the unconscious is also thinking things, but these things are hidden from conscious thought.

Sometimes the unconscious drives conscious behavior without the conscious person knowing. If you are conscious of something you do, you can explain why you did it and what you did. When the unconscious takes over, you may not be conscious of why you are doing something or even what you are physically doing. It can be that powerful.

The unconscious person drives behavior because it has other, deeper reasons for behaving the way it does. It can seize control because it is threatened and perceives the need to survive. Usually the reasons are related to strong internal conflicts that haven’t been resolved and the frustration and the strong desire to protect oneself at any cost.

Interactions with people that trigger fear, jealousy, loathing, or a perceived threat can make us do things to protect ourselves that our conscious mind isn’t aware of. Chances are good these issues are related to family or things that have deeply affected us in some way and are buried so far down that they’re forgotten. Problems arise because painful issues like these can’t be put away without consequences.

Not all unconscious behaviors are due to deep-seated issues. Sometimes they can be relatively superficial but still involve uncomfortable problems you decided to ignore. You can’t make issues go away. You can choose to deny issues, but all that does is bury the problem and create an internal conflict—and then the unconscious will deal with it.

When that happens, the issue can surface as another problem seemingly completely unrelated to the one you are in denial of. You’ll have no idea why you are having this problem. This can be very confusing for people. It’s why they seek therapy—to discover why they are doing or feeling things for reasons they can’t explain.

The unconscious person is immensely and clearly perceptive, maybe even more so than the conscious person. People who are not perceptive as conscious persons can have razor-sharp unconscious selves. No matter how unperceptive you think someone is, you can bet his or her unconscious is reading everything with crystal clarity. The unconscious will see through almost anything. Because of the separation between the two, the conscious person may never perceive something the unconscious person sees.

For example, if someone is trying to manipulate you or fool you, your unconscious will clearly see the strategy. If the person who is trying to manipulate you is very good at it, you may not be consciously aware of it—but your unconscious will be aware. If you are in touch with your unconscious, you will feel uncomfortable about what is happening and realize something is wrong, even if you can’t put your finger on it. Your gut is a good unconscious indicator. If you are out of touch with your unconscious, you won’t be able to connect the warning signals that something is wrong. This means people can do things they are completely unaware of. They can even pass a lie-detector test when asked if they did something their unconscious drove.

The unconscious can be an unfair judge of people and their motivations. It has its own way of interpreting the world, and it’s out of a person’s conscious control. An unconscious person can be vengeful and full of rage. Problems in childhood can shape how adult unconscious persons interpret the world around them.

When the unconscious person is out of balance with the conscious person, there are personality issues. A troubled unconscious person can be a problem. When you couple this type of unconscious personality with its ability to clearly perceive the outside world’s intentions, you get paranoid thinking that can be extremely suspicious and judgmental. When the unconscious personality is in this state and interprets a threat, it can come out as intangible feelings of untrustworthiness or other types of distrust.

The unconscious is a master at protecting itself, so it is inherently distrustful. Protection and defense are paramount. The unconscious can affect the judgment of the conscious person without him or her knowing it. This influence on the conscious person will be subtle but powerful. That’s why it’s important to pay attention to the things the unconscious person looks for when you interact with a conscious person.

It’s good to know when you deal with people if things they do are conscious or unconscious behaviors. Conscious behaviors can be dealt with easily; unconscious behaviors are difficult to deal with, as the person doesn’t know why or what they’re doing. If you bring it up, the individual won’t know what you’re talking about. Direct confrontation is a bad idea and can jeopardize your relationship with the person.

The best way to work around unconscious behavior is to avoid direct confrontation. If you confront a person about his or her unconscious behavior, you will cause the person to become defensive (not good), and you may run the risk of becoming a target of his or her unconscious. So a good rule to follow is, if you are going to address someone about a particular behavior, make sure you know whether it’s conscious or unconscious.

Understanding the concept of the unconscious person is vitally important to how you relate to people; if you’re in sales, it gives you an edge. You can influence, persuade, and have better relationships with people. If you don’t understand the unconscious person, you will be selling with one eye closed. This can mean lost sales, superficial relationships, stagnation in deals, and even alienating someone without knowing what you did. You might not even know this is happening to you, and surprisingly, the person doing it to you might not know it either.

Carl Jung, the Swiss psychotherapist who, along with Sigmund Freud, established psychoanalysis as an institution, is quoted as saying, The unconscious mind of man sees correctly even when conscious reason is blind and impotent. As a salesperson, everything you do with a customer is dependent on that individual’s conscious and unconscious personality. The unconscious personality can be very black-and-white about issues, wildly opinionated, and quick to judge. The unconscious person can be completely different from the conscious one.

If you aren’t careful about how you look, act, and perform, you can be blocked from reaching your goal by a ghostlike adversary you’ve unintentionally slighted. It could be as simple as dressing a little too different or being a little less professional or conservative than you could. The most subtle things you do can be a trigger. The rule is to be aware of the unconscious personality.

Everybody has the ability to be good at reading people. The problem is that many of us are disconnected from our unconscious, which communicates through feelings and other subtle messages to our conscious minds. Some people don’t even know these messages are coming upward to their consciousness. Over two-thirds of our communication is nonverbal. Much of what we say isn’t even said with words. It’s the unconscious person who delivers the dialogue of nonverbal communication.

One way or the other, we are all students of psychology. People are social animals who behave in complex ways. Some people aren’t very good at understanding this behavior and others are. As a salesperson, you probably have a natural understanding. You may be able to figure out why people say and do things. The better you are at this, the more effective you’ll be. Your attempts to influence others will be more successful, and you will be a more versatile and competitive salesperson. You’ll find both personal and professional advantages to this understanding.

The salesperson who has an eye for dealing with two personalities for every person can be more effective than the salesperson who is unaware of it. At times, the unconscious will communicate very clearly through nonverbal behavior. You communicate nonverbally too. The way you dress, use body language, comb your hair, maintain eye contact, shake hands, show up on time, behave dependably, return phone calls, complete action items, show your trustworthiness, and hundreds of other things is what you really say to the unconscious person.

The attention you pay to the little things is often more important than what you say. If you make an effort to communicate to both the conscious and unconscious person, you will be far more successful in what you do. That awareness is the basis of much of the sales advice you’ll read in this book. It’s something to always keep in mind.

Chapter One

Grooming

The Basics of Personal Care

A salesperson has to jump into an immersive environment of people. Interacting with and influencing people is your specialty. How you look and the way you behave is one of the most important factors in how successful you can be. Before you take the role of a salesperson, you’d better look and behave like a normal human being. One of the most basic requirements for that is good grooming.

Hygiene

The rules are simple here. You want to minimize distractions to selling. If something about your appearance is distracting, it could derail your best efforts. Why chance it? Always remember: something that is trivial to you may be hugely significant to someone else. Hygiene is well within your control. Make sure it doesn’t become the primary focus for your customer. You don’t want to become the butt of jokes after you leave.

I know of salespeople who have various issues with hygiene, including bad breath; excessive nose, ear, and facial hair; brown teeth; or greasy hair that makes them look like they never shower. This may sound silly, but some people never got good training when they grew up. They might also be lazy or depressed.

Breath

Make sure you are aware of the state of your breath. Don’t expect people to tell you if you have bad breath. There is something in our society that makes people very uncomfortable about doing that. I know some people who are unaware of their breath issues and nobody seems to be telling them about it. Personally, I only do that for people I am close with. (A friend is someone who tells you your breath is bad.)

Bad breath can be a detriment with customers. In an interview, it can kill an opportunity for you. I know of salespeople customers joke about because their breath is so bad. It’s insensitive, but it happens. I am not a dentist, but I know there are several reasons for bad breath. These include lack of dental hygiene, infrequent dentist visits, plaque, and other mouth-related issues.

A problem with your breath can build up gradually, and you may not notice it right away. If you think you have bad breath, ask someone close to you to confirm it. Then go to the dentist and ask what is going on. If you are in denial about it, that’s a bigger problem. The lesson is to take very good care of your teeth and visit the dentist regularly. This is very important not only for your job but for your overall health. There have been many scientific studies that show people with good dental hygiene are healthier and live longer.

Food is another source of bad breath. Vegetables like garlic and onions should be avoided at lunch. Use good judgment when you have to eat before you visit a customer. Use mints or something else to clean your breath. Parsley is a very good breath freshener.

Hair

Keep your hair well trimmed. Not too long. No long sideburns. I am sure there will be a time when everyone will be wearing longer hair. If that happens, okay, but be conservative.

Remove excessive hair from your face and ears. I’m not telling you to pluck your eyebrows, even though I am sure some salespeople do. But excessive nose and ear hair can be distracting to many people.

If you have dandruff, get rid of it. Dandruff can be very distracting when you’re meeting with people. Beards can be prime sources of dandruff, even short beards. I have seen bearded salespeople—otherwise clean guys—walk around with dandruff spread all over their chests. Yuck! There are many off-the-shelf remedies for dandruff. They are not all the same. One type may not work and another may. You might not find anything that works. If you need to, see your doctor or dermatologist about it. But get it fixed.

Body

Shower every day using a good shampoo and soap. Use a washrag to scrub yourself. Clean your ears out. It’s gross to casually look into someone’s ear and see a big glob of wax or flaking skin. (You can tell that I notice detail—do you?)

Don’t wear cologne or fragrances. Some people are allergic to them. When I first started in sales, I called on a friend from engineering school who was now a prospect. I liked a particular cologne and wore it. After a few minutes, my friend asked me if I was wearing cologne. I replied yes. He laughed and said, Why are you wearing cologne in a business situation? Are you trying to date me? I promptly stopped using it.

Feet

Make sure your shoes don’t smell. I know people who have a chronic odor problem with their feet. Their shoes become radiators of terrible smells. This is easily managed by special insoles you can buy over the counter. This can happen to anyone. Over time, shoes will pick up enough bacteria to begin to smell.

Change your socks and underwear every day. Reusing socks is another way to get smelly feet and athlete’s foot. If you get recurrences of athlete’s foot, it may be because you aren’t drying between your toes after you shower or swim. Athlete’s foot is contagious. You can pick it up off floors or pass it onto a floor. If you get athlete’s foot, there are good over-the-counter treatments for it. If you have a more serious case, your doctor can prescribe something to get rid of it.

Health Concerns

If you have a cut on your finger, make sure you wear a bandage. Some people may think a cut on your finger will give them AIDS. Many people are scared of AIDS, though they don’t understand it. Shaking hands with a customer who thinks you could be passing on AIDS because you have a cut on your finger isn’t a good idea. I know of several senior managers who are scared to death of people with cuts on their fingers.

If you have a cold, don’t feel obligated to shake hands when meeting or departing a meeting. Explain to the people that you would rather not pass your germs to them. While most people don’t think of this, I know a CEO who obsesses over getting germs from handshaking. Most people will appreciate your concern for them if you pass on the handshake. Just explain why.

Cold sores on your mouth can be distracting. Get them treated. There are some new over-the-counter medications that seem to work very well to heal the sores quickly.

Diet

Some diets can make your body smell or give you bad breath. I know of people who went on the Atkins diet and began to have a whole body smell that was unpleasant. You notice it when you are in a small conference room with the door shut. Also, garlic can make your entire body smell terrible. One time I went to a big company dinner at a posh downtown restaurant and ordered a big steak smothered with garlic cloves. It was delicious. The next morning, I noticed I smelled like I had fell into a septic tank. It was really bad. I stayed home that day.

In interactive business situations, if you offend someone based on lack of hygiene, you will never be told about it. You may be avoided in the future, and you will never know why. Worse, you may be the butt of jokes by others. Don’t take a chance and trust that people will accept a hygiene problem. Have healthy grooming habits, and then you don’t have to worry about it.

Good hygiene is essential to your health and necessary for interacting with people. Taking care of yourself is something most normal, healthy people do. Now that you’re squeaky clean, it’s time to eliminate any bad habits you may or may not be aware of.

Bad Habits and Stuff You Shouldn’t Do in Public

There are some things people do consciously and unconsciously that are viewed as distracting and possibly inappropriate. As a salesperson, if you are doing these things, you may be viewed as uncultured, impolite, and generally a person others would prefer not to be around. Bad habits are very distracting and can derail your intentions. Some people will view bad habits as a symptom that the salesperson is lying or trying to hide something. Whatever the reason, people will perceive a bad habit poorly.

The best thing is don’t these things around customers or in public—or don’t do them anywhere at all. Some of these habits are symptoms of nervous displacement and may be very difficult to break. You may need to get some help to break them. There are several ways to do this. Self-help therapies can be audiotapes, videotapes, chemical treatments—the list goes on and on. Therapy can be helpful to eliminate habits that are harmful. Hypnotism and acupuncture are other possibilities, but I have no idea how effective they are. I have heard from people I know that hypnotism and acupuncture do work with some people and can be effective.

Some habits are unconscious methods of getting attention. These are habits of behavior that you may not realize you are doing. I have seen salespeople display all of these habits directly in front of customers.

Chewing and Biting

Some people chew on their lip over and over while they are talking or listening. If you do a lot of chewing, there’ll be open sores on the lip. Both the chewing and the sores are distracting and uncomfortable to look at.

Nail-biting is a common habit. Sometimes people do it when they drive or are at rest. They may not do this in front of customers or other people, but the results—open wounds on the ends of the fingers—are obvious to the detail-oriented. With the fears over exposed blood and AIDS, customers may have a problem shaking a chewed-up hand.

Smoking

These days, smoking is looked on as a dirty, smelly habit that will eventually kill you. I don’t smoke, and I don’t know many salespeople who do. If you don’t smoke and someone comes up to you who just had a butt, you can smell it easily.

Many customer buildings or grounds do not allow smoking. I see some salespeople hanging outside the lobby to get a smoke in even when the weather is really bad out. They look so miserable. Smoking is an addiction, and it takes a big effort to quit. Try to get help if you can’t quit.

Drinking

If you like alcohol and control your drinking, that’s fine. But make sure when you go out with a customer that you imbibe at a conservative pace. If the customer has a drinking problem, you need to be careful not to insult him or her, but try to keep yourself from getting stewed in front of that person.

Do you think you may be drinking too much? Try to stop. If you can’t, you should look into therapy or some kind of treatment. Many people drink responsibly. There is plenty of information in the public domain about how to control it. For some people this is very tough to manage.

Chewing Gum

Chewing gum in front of people is rude and distracting. Only do it if your customer offers you some. If you are going to be in mixed company, do not chew gum even if it is offered. Make sure your car isn’t littered with gum wrappers and other indications of your habit.

Attention-Seeking Behaviors

This is a class of behaviors where the salesperson has a tilt to the head when talking or some other acceptable behavior that borders on normal but is different enough to attract attention. For example, I know of a person who always begins a sentence with a muted chuckle when answering a tough question. She doesn’t even know it’s happening. The chuckle makes it seem as if she finds the question amusing even when it is very serious. If you are doing this kind of thing, you are probably not aware of it. People who do this often overlook it consciously, but unconsciously it is viewed as different and not normal.

Another example is affective speech. This is when you put too much emphasis on words in a sentence. Sometimes it can sound like slurring your words or ending a sentence by saying the words too quickly. Some typical ones to control could be

• clearing your throat excessively