Underneath My Clothes
By Jo Ettles
()
About this ebook
When we cease this fight, stop the negative internal dialogue and acknowledge our uniqueness by taking full responsibility for our wellbeing, it is only then that we can release our spirit from this struggle and find peace.
You have one life to live so don't waste it feeling inferior based on weigh, size, appearance or lack of self-worth. Every chapter of your life, just like this book, is a part of your story. You have the opportunity to begin a new chapter. Today is a perfect day to change your life and make peace with your body.
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Underneath My Clothes - Jo Ettles
Introduction
Self-esteem has never been a problem for me. I have always struggled however with my body in some way. Allergies, weight gain, weight loss, over-eating, under-eating, yoyo dieting, you name it; I have experienced it. What accompanies all these highs and lows are all sorts of emotions. Finally, after more than fifty years on the planet, I have learnt to manage and understand my delicate constitution and accept and respect myself, curves and all. For the last eight years, I have had the absolute privilege of working as a wellness consultant. Sharing so many people’s battles with food, weight, body issues and self-esteem has taught me why it is important to stop the internal fight that we often have with ourselves. I have learnt that it is vital for each and every one of us to deeply love and respect our body, mind and spirit. It is absolutely paramount for us to acknowledge all of the beautiful qualities that we have been blessed with. Self-love and self-acceptance are the foundation of wellness.
I remember consulting with two sisters some years ago. They had pretty much done and dusted the whole diet circuit: Pre-packaged diet meals, shakes, high protein foods only, soup diets; you name it, they had tried it. None of these options had offered a permanent solution to their ongoing food battles. They were ready to quit dieting and embrace healthy eating as a lifestyle. One sister wanted to lose about twenty kilos, the other sister wanted to lose about five kilos. I remember thinking at the consultation, Five kilos! That’s a piece of cake,
pardon the pun. What I learnt from these two sisters at that initial consultation was that no matter what the challenge, whether it is body image or low self-esteem, whether it is five kilos or fifty kilos, the emotions associated with the issue feel pretty much the same for everyone. It can feel overwhelmingly heavy, frustrating and all consuming.
Sadly, most people arrived at my office at their absolute lowest ebb. Not knowing how to take those vital steps forward that would bring change and freedom were challenging. I was constantly overwhelmed at how a client’s body language and energy reflected every emotion that they were feeling at that initial first meeting. Physically and verbally they expressed frustration, while they remained completely focussed on everything that was weighing them down. Each client made sure I heard every single thing that they despised about themselves. Although my job was to educate clients on eating healthy food as a lifestyle, I soon found out that the key to unlocking the struggle was to change the way people viewed themselves as a whole. When people look at themselves through the eyes of love, they are quickly released from their internal struggles. Combining self-love, acceptance and appreciation for all your body does, with an education on healthy nurturing food, is a recipe for success.
For many who arrived at my office, I am positive that they thought I had a magic wand placed in my drawer and once I had heard their issues, I would just wave the wand and sprinkle them with my magic ‘I want to be skinny’ dust and Violà! Issues begone! They would skip out of my office and feel like a brand new person. Well, unfortunately for them, I didn’t have a magic wand and I didn’t have magic skinny dust. I did however have the ability to shower each and every client with uplifting energy and hope. Hope that if they changed their focus as well as their diet, they could completely achieve wellness on every level and then they would really feel like a brand new person.
The secret to feeling beautiful, in my opinion, is quite simply this, manage your challenges, take responsibility for every aspect of your life and speak to yourself as you would someone you loved. Negativity has to be one of the most destructive energies of all. Make the decision daily to look at yourself and your world and see the abundant beauty. I choose to see every part of my make-up as something special and beautiful. I fully embrace and accept myself and I am committed to appreciating all that is me every single day. Beauty must be seen in your own eyes first.
You can literally change your life right now. Let your self-image be a reflection of the true you and dig down as deep as you can and acknowledge all the amazing qualities that you have inside and out. Let them shine through. Make the commitment to nurture your body, your mind and your spirit with elements that will ensure you are illuminated in every way. In this book, I share my highs and lows with you, my vulnerabilities, my struggles and my journey to making peace with my body. I hope that through my experiences, you discover just how incredible you are. If you think you are the only one in the world facing challenges, think again! You are not alone. Often the person you least expect is struggling with some issue. The secret to self-acceptance is how you view your challenges and how you manage them.
Every chapter of your life, just like this book, is a part of your story. If you are experiencing low self-esteem, body image issues or have developed negative, bad habits, I encourage you to turn the page. You have the opportunity to begin a new chapter. Today is a perfect day to change your life and make peace with your body.
"Challenges are what make life interesting and overcoming
them is what makes life meaningful."
—Joshua J. Marine
PART ONE
I Am Woman
Chapter One
Ginger Meggs
Iwas born in 1963. As far as I know, I was a fairly healthy baby. I honestly can’t remember my life before the age of about four or five years. I do remember little things that happened and have occasional flashbacks, but everything is vividly clear from school age. The memories that are the strongest in my childhood are those that are associated with sickness, nothing serious, but certainly niggling afflictions which were severe enough to affect normal day-to-day life. Often the symptoms of these afflictions were amplified because I just didn’t know how to handle the discomfort associated with them. Pale skinned and covered with freckles, I was nicknamed Ginger Meggs by Mum and Dad; Ginger Meggs was a mischievous, freckled-faced male cartoon character made famous in the 1920s. That should help you visualise my appearance. I don’t think I was that mischievous, but I guess the pale skin and freckles topped off with strawberry blonde hair conjured up some similarities. I am still a little confused as to why they nicknamed me after a boy but, I shouldn’t be offended as Mum and Dad nicknamed my older sister ‘Goog’. Isn’t that an Australian slang term for a hardboiled egg? I guess it was the 60s so I will cut them some slack.
Mum has always been a really warm, loving cook especially when my entire family were all living at home. She took great pride in preparing filling homely meals for us daily. You would always find a fresh loaf of warm white bread on the counter after school. She would often make a shepherd’s pie for dinner, laden with soft creamy potatoes all golden and brown, and her signature dish was lemon meringue pie. Soft delicate crust filled with the smoothest of lemon filling and meringue that seemed to peak about half a metre high. She would bake biscuits and cakes and lovely meals all the time and our house often smelt of garlic and onions freshly sautéed. The garlic and onion fried was a trick she often pulled at about 6pm just before Dad got home from work. It tricked us all into thinking that a gourmet meal was being prepared. I have since learnt it was a sign that she had absolutely no idea what she was going to feed us and this little fry-up would allow her some time to think of something practical, affordable and easy to put on the table.
So what did we eat in the 1960s? Well, we didn’t eat pre-packaged meals or fatty, take-away dinners that’s for sure; it was mainly meat and three vegetables. Eggs, wheat flour, white sugar and butter were all used for cooking staples. Cakes and slices were made from eggs, butter, flour and a little icing sugar. A normal day for me as a child would include, toast with Vegemite for breakfast. At school, it was traditional that at 10am, we would all have to drink a bottle of full cream milk. This milk was usually warm, as it would have been delivered earlier in the day and left outside the classroom in the sun until recess. Lunch would be a sandwich and an apple. After school, well I would eat tons of that beautiful fresh white bread and dinner would be meat and vegetables; think roast meat, mash potatoes and peas. This type of menu was commonly served in most middle class households in Australia.
I definitely didn’t have any weight issues as a child; I was quite lanky and thin. I would walk to school, run around and play outside until 5pm every night. I was really active and busy, every weekend playing netball. I was fit and lean, but I was plagued with ailments, nothing serious or sinister, but just constant irritations and allergies causing endless frustration. I suffered with sinusitis, headaches, hives, eczema, skin rashes, itching and I think Mum was convinced that I was a bit of a hypochondriac to be honest. It wasn’t until I was well into my thirties, that all those symptoms I had suffered as a child were diagnosed as being associated with food allergies. Growing up, my diet consisted of far too much wheat and sugar. It was just too much for my system to handle.
I also suffered with chronic eczema as a child and it itched so badly it would often bleed. My sinuses were continuously blocked and it felt like I had a permanent headache. The full cream milk that was compulsory to drink at school would aggravate my sinuses and make the symptoms a hundred times worse. In spring when