Twin Flame Journey From A Man's Perspective: Guiding The Collective Inward

MY SOUL TWIN EXPERIENCE

Here, I will share my personal Soul Twin experience. It has been both a simple, but also very complex journey. Certain information will be restricted from this guidebook, to protect her privacy. All written within this section and guidebook about her, I, and our journey are not for the purpose of degrading or pedestaling any person’s name, reputation, status, well-being, or identity. All written within this section is only for the sharing of limited information on our personal journey for enterjoyment and educational purposes only. I don’t want to make my Twin (or any woman) out to be a horrible or undesirable woman. But I do want to write this to allow the Twin Soul Community a reconsideration on the running/chasing issues, or what we have been told is running/chasing, and the causes of such.

IN THE BEGINNING

TIME: MARCH 2018 - AUGUST 2020

In 2020 I was living at a particular family member’s house, a place I did not want to be. I was around people I did not want to be around. I was stuck in a difficult situation in 2018 and had to choose between being homeless for the second time in my life. Or I could at least have a bed to lay in and roof over my head, but in a place I did not want to be, and people I did not want to be around.

From early-mid 2018 to May 2021 I lived in that house. I planned on getting out of there as soon as possible. But that would prove to not be the case. I started to suffer from serious health problems, mostly heart related. This led to me being unable to maintain a job (it was already difficult for me to get one). That led to financial issues. Then I felt truly stuck. It wasn’t enough to just exercise or change my diet. I knew there was something going on beyond my control.

My mother passed away in August 2019, due to heart issues. That was the last straw for me. I was so sick, broke, in debt, everything going missing, breaking down, or not working. I wanted to give up. I didn’t know what to do. The only thing that kept me going was a large amount of money that I was able to get from her passing.

Since I wasn’t able to work, I started self-educating on cryptocurrencies and investing in the stock market in late 2018. I started with small amounts of money and learned within a few months to multiply that money with an 80 to 90 percent rate guarantee. With the money I got from my mother passing, I was able to take care of the things that cost money, such as paying off consumer debt, putting the car in the shop, catching up on bills, ext. I also began weightlifting, long walks at the park, and was able to afford a healthier diet.

This eased my health problems enough I was able to work full-time if I chose. I invested most of the money that was left over and was able to profit enough money every week that I could keep up with bills and still have money left over. This gave me enough drive and optimism to keep me moving, although I was still stuck in that house in a way.

THE MEETING

TIME: AUGUST 2020 TO SEPTEMBER 2020

In 2020 I created a Twitter social media account to stay up to date on events and advances in the stock market and cryptocurrency technology. At least two or three times a day, I logged into that account. Now anyone who has used Twitter know it can be annoying to use if not set up correctly. You’ll find you keep getting notifications and feeds which you are not interested in, are filled with click-bait, scams, and people posting ridiculous comments. That was before Twitter had some improvements.

I specifically set up my account so that I could avoid the annoyance. I streamlined it perfectly. Or so I thought…

One day, I just happened to come across a comment that had nothing to do with money, investing, or cryptocurrency. It was from a particular woman, and the comment read God is a woman. Normally, such things wouldn’t bother me. But this one random comment seemed to turn my surroundings into a black vortex, and everything disappeared. For a moment, nothing existed except me and this woman, and this one comment which would be our first interaction.

I was a bit put off by it, because for one, I didn’t want to see something like that when everything on my Twitter was set up only for things related to money, stocks, and cryptocurrencies. Additionally, it was during a time when God is a woman was something which was mentioned by some celebrities, advertisements, models, and even the woman at the grocery store. It was a statement that I saw as lacking rational and soul awareness.

I remember telling her (not in the nicest way to be honest), that if God is a woman, I won’t be worshipping her because I had observed women very carefully all my life, studied, and researched their nature and came to the truth that women are inherently unable to handle their own emotions, are deceptive, and far worse than men as far as manipulation and using other people for their own gain at the expense of others. A mouthful, I know. And you know what? She actually AGREED!

She replied - Yes you are right, God in all her perfect ways. At that point I knew it was time for me to get off the phone, but I was drawn to look at her profile picture and that’s when I was hit with a heavy dosage of what most in the Twin Soul community call ‘soul recognition’ and ‘soul familiarity’. On a deeper level, the woman looked like a female version of myself (no, she doesn’t look like a man, but is actually very feminine and gorgeous looking). I was lost for words and didn’t know what to say.

When I looked at her eyes, I fell into the picture and then found myself in outer space (I closed my eyes at this point, because well, it is just a picture and thought I was seeing things). When I came back to myself, five minutes had passed. What felt like two seconds, was actually five minutes. Looking at her eyes, even though a picture, was an intensity that is hard to describe, and can only be felt. This was the first ‘sensation’ I felt from this mysterious woman.

Then I looked through her page and read her tweets and was astounded by her level of wisdom and perception. It reminded me of myself. Then I came across two videos of her talking, one she was reading a book. My jaw dropped when I heard her talking, she spoke in a moderate passed, well-spoken manner, just like I do.

She had a unique voice I never heard before, soft and gentle, yet direct and bold. She had the same body type that I do as well, the ectomorph. I noticed in one of her pictures that she was kneeling in a way exactly the way I have kneeled all my life, and still do today. I thought maybe I had went crazy for a moment. I followed her page, because she was deep into politics and government stuff that I knew anything about.

DRAWING CLOSER

As the days passed, I’d comment on tweets she posted and eventually we drew closer together, talking more about ourselves and lives. I did notice she eventually started tweeting about her personal life, and this is when I realized that this woman wasn’t very fond of men. It was apparent she felt like men were the source of all the problems in our society, aggressive like wild animals, and that only women and children are innocent by nature.

Again, flawed, because all men were once children at some point in their lives. If boys are innocent, at what age, and under what circumstances, or parenting do they become toxic, abusive, and sex-crazed? If girls are innocent, at what age, and under what circumstances, or parenting do they fail to retain their innocence in a gynocentric society which REWARDS women for shaming and destroying the lives of men?

Now, at this time in my life, I had already known and met many women who are like this. So, I wasn’t surprised or put off. I didn’t want to share personal stuff to the public. So, I decided to send her a DM, a picture of myself and short description of who I am. She said that I was handsome and then I didn’t hear from her for a while. I messaged her to see what she was up to, and she said sorry I didn’t respond. I have a lot of feelings to process.

I thought Well dam, was it not a good idea to send a picture of me? At least it’s not a dick pic! Ha! After that we talked literally every day through the message system on Twitter. She lived in a certain state I always wanted to visit, which I thought was interesting because I always wanted to go there as a vacation point of interest. We also played the same video games and she had invited me to go to that particular state to meet her. Now, I did have the money, I could have caught a flight and stay there a few weeks. But for me, I have to get to know someone before I make moves that bold. This would later on turn out to be a wise choice…

SOUL TWIN TELEPATHY

Now, I did not create that Twitter account to look for women to be with. I could have just downloaded a dating app if I wanted, or even better go to a local bar or club. And no, the Twitter account I currently have now is not the same one we met on.

Well one day I was sitting in bed and the strangest thing happened. I was looking at my phone, and the sensation of someone being behind me looking over my shoulder was very strong. Looking into the screen of my phone I sensed that she was looking back at me, but through my phone. I had not even gone into Twitter. When I did though, she had tweeted that she owned Twitter. I thought that was funny.

But with what I had learned about this woman so far, I knew she was the kind to watch out for. She also tweeted something about how she doesn’t like men giving other women attention, and that the man she loves needs to protect her heart. It was said in a way as if she had a boyfriend that was flirting with a woman at the cash register or somewhere, and she was very upset.

I didn’t know (until later) that she hacked into my twitter account. She was able to see all of my DMs. Most of them were just cryptocurrency scams that I didn’t reply to. Ha! But there was one person on there I made friends with before meeting her. She happened to be a DJ and a model from the UK. She also was into politics and government stuff, which I knew nothing about, so she was educating me on it. This was before the Trump and Biden presidential election, and she was trying to persuade me to vote. Being illiterate in politics, and feeling antsy about both parties, I wanted to vote for neither to be honest! I met this friend because she was also into Bitcoin and crypto, and we crossed paths on a certain Tweet about cryptocurrency.

I do think that me talking to this woman made her jealous and triggered. At this point I already knew she liked me. She also had a massive need for attention (mentioned directly from her). The thing is, I was trying to figure out whether or not she was still married or not. A woman and even a man, can and will tell you all sorts of things to avoid saying the truth. I didn’t want to be with another man’s woman. Plus, I still had not met her in person.

So, I wasn’t making any advances due to not being sure what her relationship/marital status was and not knowing her well enough. But business wise, she being in certain professional fields, I wanted to meet her. We both had big plans in life but had financial issues, so working in tandem would have been an interest for me.

BAIT AND HOOK

TIME: SEPTEMBER 2020

After she hacked into my Twitter account, she wasn’t the same after that. Most of her tweets turned into man-hating tweets, and ‘women are better’ tweets. Then she wanted to leave twitter permanently, as she sent me a DM about someone who was causing her too many problems.

I was confused as to who. I did ask and try to clarify who, what, when, where, and why, but she either avoided the questions or didn’t give me direct answers. I sent her my phone number and told her to contact me since she was deleting her Twitter. I figured, because reading through the comments of her tweets, it appeared as if she was in conflict with others on twitter, men of course.

I didn’t realize until it was too late that she was talking about me the whole time and her inability to handle me talking to another woman as a friend. Now before she ‘deleted’ her Twitter she mentioned that she didn’t want to even talk to me. So, I logged off my own Twitter account for a few days because I was annoyed by the whole experience.

When I later logged back on, she had been tweeting on and on about some disturbing stuff (most not about me or related to me). She never called or texted me, so I took that as her not wanting to talk. One day, another weird thing happened. Whenever I picked up my phone, I had that same intense sensation as before as if she was looking back at me through the phone. I heard her voice as well, but it had a reverb sound to it.

I hadn’t been on Twitter. But this time it felt like she was reading my text messages in my cell phone. I didn’t want to ask her directly if she hacked my phone because communication between us turned into a crazy game of indirect communication because she was afraid to share her feelings and be upfront about anything. Not something I’m interested in doing. But I wrote a bait message in a way that only she would understand and know that if she seen it, it confirmed that she had hacked my twitter account and my phone. I even included her favorite emojis (call me, and unicorn emojis).

The same day, and not long after sending the message to one of my mother’s friends on my phone, and again to the woman I was talking to about the Biden-Trump election, she posted a tweet that she was found out. I thought it was funny. She even posted a picture of a surveillance camera, which I found even funnier. She’s got a dry sense of humor, just like me! Although I wasn’t laughing. I was both angry and disturbed that she hacked into my phone. According to her profession, she should know that it is illegal to invade people’s privacy without a warrant or permission.

I baited and hooked her, and she didn’t even know. Game over. At this point, I no longer want to be around the person or even talk to them. It becomes endless gameplay, and not her and I’s favorite RPG – Elder Scrolls: Skyrim. So, I stayed off Twitter. Until one day a terrible thing happened. And I knew it was from her. This time she baited and hooked me, and it nearly killed me.

PROTECT MY HEART

TIME: SEPTEMBER 2020

My father died in 2009 due to heart issues. My mother died in 2019 in August (yes, exactly 12 months before meeting my Twin) due to heart disease. I suffered from undiagnosed (doctors always said I was healthy) heart issues all my life as well, which was the worst from 2018 to early 2020. By summer of 2020, I had gotten my health to where I could at least work part-time. I still had unusually low energy, trouble getting out of bed in the morning, and pain in the heart and chest.

One night in September 2020, I ended my day like I did all the previous days. I was exhausted and hoping that my life would improve. I was depressed, like I did everything I could to live at least a half decent life, but I was just dealt a bad starting hand and luck wasn’t on my side. That night I didn’t know I’d be in for the ride of my life, literally.

Being in a car or truck, and especially driving always made me happy and feel like I’m home. Not this ride. This was the ride that would nearly kill me. Nighttime is not normal for me as it is for other people. I don’t just dream, I detach from my body and experience a world that most would see as beyond belief. It was heartbreaking experiencing the passing of both my parents.

I laid in bed, at a certain family member’s house alone. It was very quiet. I smiled, thinking I was going to finally get at least one good night’s rest. I fell asleep. THEN IT STARTED. I was in the back seat of a car on the passenger side. This was interesting because I did drive for a rideshare company on and off part-time, which she would have known if she hacked my phone, and also knew my GPS location. Although as a rideshare driver, I would be in the driver seat and not the passenger. In the back seat of this car, I sat. It was nighttime and the road was not busy with traffic.

Strangely, I noticed the car was swerving and driving about in an uncontrolled way. When I looked over to the driver’s seat to see who was driving, it was my mother! The thing is, my mother was dead in real life. In this dream, my mother’s hands looked like they were tied to the steering wheel and her body and head flopped around in the seat as the car tumbled and jerked sit-to-side down the road. I was terrified, not because the car was out of control, but because my dead mother was about to kill me as well, or what it looked like…

The car swerved recklessly down the road, even driving into the opposite lane of traffic, twice almost front-ending an oncoming vehicle. Then the car drove to the left side of the road, in the opposite lane. There was a very deep cliff, about 25 feet off the road. The car swerved back and forth a few times as if it was intentionally wanting to drive off the road and down into the ditch. The third time, the car turn hard left and drove off the road, all four wheels free, and headed down into the dark unknown.

Right before hitting the bottom, everything disappeared, and I saw her face looking at me angrily for a split second. After, an image of a heart with blood squirting out of it appeared, then I woke up. Someone had just performed witchcraft on me, cunning and secret attack…

I was drenched in sweat, it was still nighttime. My chest felt very tight, and my heart was so much in pain, I screamed. I could barely breath and fell off the bed. A bottle of water I sat hours before on the end table fell off. I grabbed it and drank the whole bottle and tried breathing deep breaths. I went in the kitchen to get some food then laid in bed, being exhausted, and having no energy. I was trying to grasp what just took place. I knew I had just been attacked and there was only one person who came to mind, her.

I went onto Twitter and noticed she had posted up pictures of herself playing with weapons, sharp objects, and even a doll, yes ones typically used in voodoo. I assume she mistook when I told her one of my ex-lovers had a .45 ACP handgun and other weapons, but she never used them to threaten me. But no, she wasn’t mistaken. I did go to the doctor, and as always, You are healthy, we can’t find anything wrong with you.

GUEST – Wow, what a story! Why are you always drenched in sweat when these happen to you?

MR. J – Well, the metaphysical realm and dreamscape is purely energy. When these things happen, there is too much energy involved for the body to handle. So, the body heats up, and sweats to try and keep cool.

GUEST – I get that. Are you mad that she did witchcraft on you? Thankfully you are still alive!

MR.J – Keep reading, you’ll find out.

THE DAY I ‘RAN’ – FED UP

I wrote a goodbye message to everyone on my Twitter page, that I wouldn’t be on there any longer. She Tweeted a picture of herself saying goodbye back. It was obvious she was very heartbroken and sad, trying to hold back her tears. After that day, I could feel a heavy sense of anger, sadness, and grief that I shouldn’t have been feeling. Where was it all coming from? I’m not an emotional person.

I wasn’t able to actually delete the page, so I was left to deactivate it. This is when the obsessive thoughts most in the Twin Soul community mention, began. I couldn’t get her off my mind. Every so often I’d reactivate my account to see what she was posting, and of course, it was her being very aggressive and defensive. Eventually I left Twitter for good and never looked back.

WHAT THE HECK IS THIS???

Various strange events (seeing repeat numbers, seeing people who look like her, hearing her voice in my head, smelling the food she ate, feeling her emotions, ext.) and other things took place over the course of 10 months after leaving her. It also included very intense dreams of her, weird body pains, sounds of air flow and popping sounds coming from my midsection, a high/drunken feeling while walking, and constant malfunctions with any electronic device I came near, including my own cell phone and cash registers at various stores.

I went online to find out what it was I was experiencing with this woman. I remembered a few years before, I ran into a picture online that said Twin Flames at the top and below a description. I was reading various stuff like kundalini awakening and how the early 21st century way of living disconnects us from God and how nature reconnects us to God.

I thought nothing of the Twin Flame picture I saw, it wasn’t me or something I knew of. But in late August I did search ‘Twin Flames’. The more I read the more it lined up with what I was experiencing from my short but intense and deadly encounter with her. Even after leaving her, I still researched Twin Flames, looking for answers. Eventually I found myself on a writing forum called Quora.com, and since then became a writer on the subject and experience of Twin Souls.

BEGINNING OF OUR ‘SEPARATION’

It became an every night occurrence. I would go to bed and have intense dreams of her and I. Usually, they were friendly interactions, sometimes we played in the grass and trees as kids, others, her and I seemed to avoid each other. Over the summer of 2021, I met a fellow Soul Twin in person from the online Twin Flame community on Quora.com. We became friends. Months later, she somehow found her phone number.

At this point, I wasn’t interested in contacting or seeing her. She deleted her Twitter, and I wasn’t able to reach her by phone. I attempted to do that months prior. But this person from the online community insisted that I at least try. Of course, upon reaching out to her, no response. I wasn’t surprised. I did more than enough research by this time to become aware of a widespread issue amongst other Soul Twins, where they had trouble getting ahold of their Twin once they separated.

In the summer of 2021, I worked a full-time job and had a business which I started. I was still investing in the stock market and cryptocurrency. I wasn’t thinking about her much, until this person from the online Twin Soul community persuaded me to at least try to get in contact with her and ‘send her love’.

At the time, I gained a loyal following on Quora.com. I was also very much into helping other Soul Twins by this point. I realize I managed to pull my energy from her and focus on my life, something many of the female Soul Twins struggled to do.

It happened again in 2020. I met another person from the online community who somehow found her phone number, this time a different one. I wondered, though, why should I have to be the one calling her? It became obvious she was not fond of men, there was some miscommunication (and lack of) between us, and then the whole witchcraft thing at the end which made me not want to talk to her. If anything, I saw it as she needed to contact me to apologize.

Then I moved out of my hometown with the help of one of the Soul Twins from the community on Quora.com. I began a new job, and my life took a different direction. I started writing books while working a full-time job, this guidebook being one of them. Over the course of being engaged with the online Twin Soul community, I got to hear lots of interesting stories from other Soul Twins. I even met a few in person, which further made me realize that I encountered something which was not normal, and certainly does not happen to everyone.

MORE TO COME…

I have nothing against her. I don’t regret leaving. But what an intense experience! Although, other things would happen over the course of the next three years. One thing though…I do hope she forgives herself and finds peace in her life. I don’t enjoy seeing other people stress, struggle, and self-destruct. If I found a better way for myself, I know she can too. I will add other parts of my experience with her in the other sections of this guidebook.

MY SOUL TWIN MIRRORING

Upon coming across the comment on Twitter which she posted, the ‘mirroring’ between us became obvious. It was the first time I ever looked in the mirror and was ‘triggered’. Due to not knowing what I was about to get into (Soul Twin mirroring of behavior), I lashed out at her, not knowing who she was or why she posted what she posted, something I normally don’t do. I did not know at the time that we were mirroring each other’s behavior.

I noticed her picture and was drawn to it. When I clicked on her profile to get a clearer look at the picture, I was shocked. The woman was GORGEOUS. But what started pulling me in was looking into her eyes. Eyes are my favorite part of a woman’s body. I know what I need to know by looking in them. Her eyes were eyes that I only seen on one woman before. They were glossy, deep, mysterious, and definitely eyes that see EVERYTHING.

I noticed right away looking at her other pictures that she had every single physical attribute I have always found attractive in a woman, down to the freckles on her face. From her long black hair, her eyes, pretty face, light-mid tone skin, to her slim but still curvy body, the way she dressed and even sat crisscrossed. We had the same smile and direct eye contact. We even had similar facial features. I read some of her other postings and was in awe at how perceptive, wise, and soulful she was. It reminded me of myself. The more I looked through her page the more everything I saw and read reminded me of myself. A few of her pictures gave me extreme DeJa’Vu.

What took me home was when I watched a video of her talking. I clicked on the video not being prepared for what I was about to hear. She had the most unique voice I ever heard from a woman, so soft and gentle but still womanly and strong. Even the way she spoke had me tearing up and feeling a little struck. Her voice sounded familiar and echoed inside me. I had to get off her profile because looking at it was too intense for me and started to confuse me. In a way, it was like this woman had been with me all my life, carefully observing my behavior, likes, dislikes, what stirs me, what calms me, what turns me on, what makes me happy, sad, angry, ext. It’s like she lived with me all my life and copied me in every way.

I had to get off Twitter. I told myself I must be imagining things. Or she must have been secretly spying on me for years and knew everything about me, and was copy-catting me. No way, it couldn’t be that of course! Grrrr, get off Twitter already!

Who the heck is this? Am I going crazy? I thought to myself. I tried not to think too much of it. I followed her anyways because I thought we would be able to relate on a lot of things. I wasn’t expecting to make any friends on Twitter and definitely not begin what I would soon after learn was my Soul Twin journey. It started simple and small, just a few comments here and there I made on some of her posts. I didn’t know why, but all of a sudden, since the day I first engaged with her on there, I had not been able to free her from my mind.

I ALWAYS thought about her. It was strange. Her name and face stayed in my head. This never happened to me with any woman I had ever met in my life. I don’t get attached. But with her, it was less than a day. This was the beginning of me learning and experiencing what attachments are.

Those few comments on her posts turned into lots of comments and deeper conversations. It got more strange, and my curiosity was through the roof. The more we talked and learned about each other, the more I felt like this woman was someone who had learned everything about me, even my secrets and learned to mimic me. It was strange, but somehow so addictive and pleasant experiencing this woman, even thousands of miles away from each other.

I wrote a list of all the things she and I had similar and I eventually stopped because I just kept finding things and the page was already full. I wanted to know more about this woman, on a deeper and more personal level. I told her I was going to DM and did just that. Things got really intense. So intense that the triggering increased, and I could not remain engaged with her without the pain and intensity becoming unbearable. I could tell the same was happening to her.

This was around the same time I had the second dream of her that I still remember today vividly. In the dream, she was standing on a sidewalk, in front of a building. She wore what looked like a graduation gown. She had long, black, silky hair, a very pretty face, and had the same smile that I did. Looking into her glossy, deep eyes, I saw all my own thoughts, feelings, desires, fears, trauma, beliefs, and energy. I was looking at the female version of myself. Myself in a woman’s body. Neither of us exchanged words in the dream, but the energy alone and eye contact was highly intense.

Whoever she was, she knew everything about me. There was nothing I could hide from her. The idea of a secret no longer existing or being something that could exist. I was embarrassed, guilty, and ashamed of myself, and so was she.

I had more intense and mysterious dreams of this woman. So much so that I continued to try and figure out what I was experiencing. I had done a lot of reading on Quora.com on Twin Flames (Quora comes up a lot on Google Twin Flame searches) and decided to create an account and have feeds go to my notifications.

The more I learned, I eventually came to a place of accepting this woman and the intense energy that I couldn’t run from. Since then, I have learned so much about myself, healed, and changed my life in a way I wasn’t able to do before meeting her. I’m no longer confused about her or what all this is. I know exactly who she is, and what all this is about. She’s me. And this is about experiencing the Oneness that is everything and everyone. This is a soul journey to ascension back to Union, or as I call Oneness Consciousness™️.

MY SOUL TWIN DREAMS

About those series of intense and vivid dreams I had when I was 3 years old…In the one which I was on the island and saw the dragons under the water, those other three people…one of them actually was her. The energy and presence of the long black-haired woman was the same. The other two, I met one of them as well, actually in person. The same hair, hair color, height, small body frame, ext. Did I not mention before I have the gift of foresight? This gift causes me (yes it still happens!) to see people in dreams before I meet them in real life.

It all connects. My whole life experience, the dreams, the soul journey, the Soul Twin meeting, ext. It all connects. I see the big picture. The journey to Union, Oneness Consciousness™️, or a conscious state of awareness that everyone and everything is One Energy.

In another dream, I met her at an airport. I get lost in places like airports, and I figured she would have a better time finding me. I stood in a spot looking for her and felt a tap on my back. I turned around and there she was, smiling back at me.

In another dream, she texted me that she missed me, never forgot about me and was so sorry for ignoring me for so long and she wanted to know if I could forgive her, and if I did, she wanted to see me in person.

A few days after I had a different dream, I was standing near what looked like a barn or a shed, and when I turned and looked over, she was running towards me and jumped on me to hug me.

MY SOUL TWIN ~ LEARNING TO LOVE

I was tired from running errands and helping my first client in my business. I took a shower and went to bed. I fell asleep.

In the dream I sat down in the yoga standard pose with my eyes closed. When I opened my eyes, I noticed I was sitting in a large grass field where the grass was cut really low but it was still full and fluffy. I noticed a little girl sitting directly in front of me. She had black hair and wore a dress. In the dream I knew who the girl was. But she was behaving in a way that had me concerned. She was playing with a doll which every time she stabbed it or said something mean to it, she felt a big pain in her heart.

I asked her why are you hurting yourself? She replied I hate you. You hurt me. I need to kill you! She attacked the doll more. She cried tears of pain, because every time she attacked the doll, she felt the pain in her own heart, in her soul. I asked the girl There is no way I could have hurt you. I've been sitting here in a deep sleep for a few thousand years, and you are obviously a younger soul than I am. Can you please stop hurting yourself? She replied, Leave me alone! She then attacked the doll even more, still crying from the pain she felt. I told the girl The pain you are feeling in your heart and soul, you are causing by trying to harm me. I'm sorry to say but you are hurting your Self. The one you are attacking when you try to hurt me is your Self.

The girl got angry and threw the doll away from her, and the items she used to attack the doll. She turned her face away from me, with her arms folded, with her eyes closed and head up, still angry and dropping tears from her eyes. I knew the girl would be okay. So, I closed my eyes. I don't remember how long my eyes were closed, but when I opened them, the girl was sitting in front on me looking at me smiling! She had a different dress on, one that caught my attention, it was very pretty and elegant. They went along perfectly with her braided pigtails. I noticed some flowers (roses and lavender) planted in front of me.

I asked the girl You are happy this time. You learned how to love yourself. You learned every time you sought to hurt someone else, you caused your Self the pain. I am proud of you. The girl said I'm sorry I tried to hurt you. Oh, I mean, I was trying to hurt myself. But I am sorry anyways. I said Lesson learned. But why did you plant these flowers in front of me?

She replied Because roses always make me happy. I wished the man who truly loves me would give me roses, so I know it's him. I planted the roses as a gift for you because when I was hurting myself, you were the only man who was concerned about me. You loved me when no one else did. You even saved my life, I was about to kill myself and didn't even know it. Thank you for saving me and truly loving me. These roses and lavender are for you!

You are right. Another lesson learned! Good student! But how did you know I like lavender? I asked. She replied, I know who you are! I asked, And who is that? I asked. The girl got a sad faced and looked down. You don't have to tell me, it's okay. I said. She replied I didn't know before, but you are him! You are me. I finally found you! I'm sorry I tried to hurt you. My eyes closed shut again. When my eyes opened, the girl was gone. I looked to the left, she wasn't there, I looked to the right, she wasn't there either. I looked ahead and only the roses and lavender where there. A light breeze passed through, and I heard the voice of a woman.

Then a woman walked in front of me from behind me. She sat down in front of me, smiling. I noticed, the woman looked like the little girl. I love you. She spoke. I replied, You mean you love yourself? But thank you for loving me, I honor that. She replied Oh yes, you taught me how to love my Self. But I wanted to love you in return, because you taught me how to love my Self, and I want to share this love with you. I replied Well it's only us here, we can. Yes.

The woman leaped forward at me and gave me a hug. We both started to rise upward above the ground, still hugging.

REBIRTH (TRANSCENDENCE) DREAM

I was in a house full of people. Some I know, some I don't. I wondered why there were so many people in the house. I held a baby (baby symbolic for birth or something new). The baby was happy and giggly. Then I happened to be in a room. She walked up to me like she was going to hug me. She was very happy and excited. The energy from her was intense! I woke up right before she touched me because that happens whenever I see her in a dream and the energy gets too high.

I woke up and heard the masterpiece of a song - Bob Marley's song Could you be loved as if it was playing from a speaker in the room.

SECTION TWO

A PARTICULAR WRITING FORUM

While trying to figure out what I was experiencing with her, I consistently found myself on the writing forum, Quora.com.

This writing forum would serve as the place I learned a lot about Soul Twins. It also has been the place I have engaged with other Soul Twins, met a few in person, and eventually created my own space. I experienced the worst, the best, and all in between. But it also showed me a lot of things which most people performing internet searches about Twin Flames and Twin Souls might not be aware of…some things that can be jaw dropping, undeniable, and triggering.

I realized the reality of Soul Twins is not the roses and sunshine many pictures, videos, and writings paint them to be. But then again, you easily come across content on the internet from female Twin Flames, tarot card readers, energy channelers, psychics, and even undercover witches about how toxic and unavailable the male Twin Flames are. But it’s much deeper than that…

WELCOMED ~ NOT SO WELCOMED

Although I first joined Quora.com wondering why I was experiencing all the wild and intense things from my encounter with her, I found myself helping other Twins with their journey. They were mostly female Twins, more than 97%.

The Twin Soul community online, and especially on Quora.com was heavily dominated with female Soul Twins. It felt like I was the only male Twin in the room filled with nothing but women. I did seek to find some male Twins on there, but they were either unreachable, or rarely online.

This is when I realized a heavy majority of the female Twins were struggling with the Journey. He won’t even reply to any of my text messages. Why is my Twin Flame running from me? I tried telling him how much I loved him, but he blocked me. The night I went over to my DM’s house, we talked for hours, and it felt really good, we had sex, and after that I never heard from him again. It’s been weeks but I can’t get him off my mind. Why am I going through this? He did it again. Every time me and my Twin Flame get close, he runs off and gets into a relationship with another woman. Why is this happening to me? What can I do to get my DM to share his feelings? I know he loves me but every time we start talking deeper, he pulls away.

It was so common to see these types of answer requests and comments on other writer’s posts. Then it hit me. Something was very different here. I wasn’t the one running or avoiding the connection. It was her. I was the one online, seeking answers, engaging others, and wanting to know what was going on and why I experienced what I did with her.

This is when I began sharing my experiences, dreams, and the intense energy I felt from her. The female Twins caught on, and I found myself surrounded by female Twins, all asking questions and for me to share more. But it wasn’t all pleasant. There were also female Twins who I saw as being very masculine, rude, and defensive, simply for me being a male Soul Twin. They told me that I was toxic, stupid, and in my ‘ego’. I ignored it for the most part, and sometimes finding myself having to put my foot down.

OUTCASTED BY MY OWN KIND

Sometimes it got so bad that I was told I was just in my feelings and that my journey didn’t mean anything or hold any weight. The same I desired to be helped by and help, pushed me off the forum. I know I needed to take a break. But then I decided that I should throw it all in the trash, that I was wasting time. Maybe they were right. I just needed to clear my head. Plus, I never met the woman in person any way. Was I stuck in a coma dreaming all of this or something? I needed to wake up.

But one night I had a dream, yes, another one…The Most High’s favorite way of communicating with me. In the dream, I saw Earth from a distance, in space. she and I appeared from a sea of dim lights. As we ascended up into the sky and into space, I noticed the dim lights grew brighter. A small group of the lights followed under us, forming what looked like an umbrella which covered the Earth. As her and I ascended, all of the lights across Earth grew brighter, and eventually the light was so bright they all merged into one big light, then I woke from the dream. I asked aloud, What was that?

I immediately felt a strong urge to get back on Quora.com. I surely didn’t want to, but I know what that dream meant. I was led to be on there for a very important purpose. Upon getting back onto Quora.com, I was repulsed by the same things which initially made me leave there. That’s when I