Skin Deep

PROLOGUE

June

W hy are all of those people staring at us? asked Violet MacAllister, bumping her shoulder against her friend/wedding date/sort of boss Hudson Prescott. When he glanced down at her, a little line digging in between his brows, she tipped her head in the direction of a table about fifty feet away, where a group of ten people were openly staring at them. Two of them, she recognized as Hudson’s brothers, Noah, and Levi. But other than that, they were all complete strangers to her.

New people always put her on edge. That was probably why the last new friend she’d made was…well, it was Hudson. She’d started working for him at the tattoo shop three years ago and they’d quickly struck up a friendship. At first, Violet had hoped it would be more than just a friendship, but considering that Hudson had been in the middle of planning his wedding when she’d started working for him, she’d quickly squashed that idea. And it had remained squashed all through his horrendous breakup. All through the past three years that she’d spent working with him, hanging out with him, pining for him.

Oh, yeah. It was good and squashed all right.

Probably because they weren’t expecting me to bring a date, said Hudson easily, his deep, husky voice sliding over her nerve endings like silk.

Ah. I see. I’ve shocked them and I didn’t even have to run naked through that gorgeous fountain out front.

He smirked, the corner of his mouth turning up in a way that made the tips of her fingers tingle. I mean, I won’t stop you if that’s your plan for the night. He leaned in a bit closer, the smirk edging towards devilish. Hell, I might even join you.

She pointed at the black cast covering his right arm from his shoulder to his knuckles. But you didn’t bring your trash bag.

The smirk morphed into a full on grin, one that had his piercing blue eyes flashing. What can I say? I like to live dangerously.

The word dangerously seemed to hang in the air between them, and Violet’s mind flashed back to that afternoon three weeks ago when he’d been in a terrifying motorcycle accident. He’d been incredibly lucky that his only injuries were a broken arm and several scrapes and bruises. His bike had been totaled, but at least he’d make a full recovery.

I think you’ve had enough danger for this year, she said, trying her best to keep her voice level. He played off the accident like it was no big deal and he was fine, but it had scared the absolute shit out of her. It was one of those wake up moments, like when Dorothy wakes up in Oz and suddenly everything is in glorious technicolor. Knowing just how bad that accident could’ve been had her looking at Hudson with a fresh perspective.

Mixed with old lust that she really, truly did think she’d squashed.

Hudson chuckled, the low sound vibrating down her spine. No shit.

The bartender handed them their drinks—a whiskey for him, and a negroni for her. All around them, the wedding reception was just ramping up. The couple—Hudson’s cousin Lucian and his bride Olivia—hadn’t returned from photos yet, so everyone was milling about, drinking and eating the hors d’oeuvres while upbeat jazz floated through the floral-scented air.

Come on, let’s go say hi before they start jumping to conclusions.

Yes, it would be a shame if your family thought you actually had some kind of love life, she teased. He winced and shook his head.

Ouch. Right to the heart. He dipped his head as they walked toward the table of family members/open-starers. Be gentle with me, Vi. Jeez.

She glanced at him over her shoulder, giving a little shrug and trying to ignore the way her heart was battering itself against the inside of her chest. Not my fault if the truth hurts.

What’s that saying? he asked, peering up at the ceiling as he pretended to rack his brain. Something about stones and glass houses and not throwing things…Shit, it’s on the tip of my tongue…

She scrunched up her face. Yeah, yeah, yeah, she said, rolling her eyes. Before she had time to think of another quip, they’d reached his family.

Hey, everyone, said Hudson affably, clearly not bothered by the fact that the two of them were a source of open speculation. This is my good friend, Violet.

At the words good friend, Violet glanced up at him, something twisting in her stomach. Maybe she hadn’t had enough to eat today. It was the only logical explanation for the raw, hollow feeling inside her. Scrambling to push it aside, she smiled and turned her attention to his family.

You know Noah and Levi, he said, gesturing at his brothers. This is Felicity, Noah’s girlfriend, and Madison, Levi’s girlfriend. Violet smiled and nodded at the two women, who gave her warm smiles in return, coupled with a glint of speculation in their eyes, especially Madison’s. This is my cousin Theo and his wife Lauren. Theo’s a lawyer out in LA, and Lauren⁠—

Is a super famous singer, said Violet, her face going red as she spoke. Holy shit. You’re Lauren MacKinnon.

Lauren laughed and held out her hand, shaking Violet’s. I am. Although technically, I’m Lauren Prescott. Legally, anyway. Violet blinked several times, feeling starstruck. It’s nice to meet you.

This is my cousin Sebastian and his girlfriend Kayla, and my cousin Max and his wife Willa.

Violet said hello to everyone, doing her best to keep all of the names and faces straight.

How do you two know each other? asked Willa.

We work together at the tattoo shop, answered Violet, and Willa grinned.

You know, Max and I met through work, too.

Oh, really? What do you do?

We work in software development. At the time, Max was the CEO of Tapp, and I was one of the coders.

Wow, that’s impressive, said Violet. As the conversation flowed around them, Violet became intensely aware of two facts.

Everyone else here was coupled up, making her and Hudson the only single ones; and

Hudson’s family was very impressive in a way that made Violet feel very much like an imposter who didn’t belong.

A lawyer, a US Olympic snowboarding coach, a famous singer, the director of a non-profit, a multimillionaire CEO, a rockstar computer genius.

Me? Oh, I’m just a severely dyslexic person who draws on others for a living.

Immediately, she pushed the horrible thought away. Yes, she was severely dyslexic, but she loved her work as a tattoo artist. She loved helping people express themselves through art and getting to be a part of that journey. She loved the significance of tattoos, the beauty of them.

Maybe what really had her feeling like an outsider was the state of her love life. Sure, she and Hudson had teased each other about it just a few minutes ago, but being single was something she struggled with. It was this horrible tug of war within herself of wanting to be with someone while also struggling with letting someone get close. Letting someone in. She knew she kept most people at arm’s length. It was a behavior born out of self-preservation she’d learned a long time ago.

But she knew that if she wanted a relationship, it was something she’d have to face. Especially seeing as the only man she’d even been remotely interested in over the past three years only saw her as his good friend.

After several moments, the group started to break up, venturing off in different directions. She glanced over at Hudson and reached out a hand to smooth a wrinkle on his white button-down.

Thanks. It’s not sitting right because of this thing, he said, lifting the arm wrapped in the fiberglass cast. He’d skipped the tie, leaving his shirt open at the collar and revealing a glimpse of inked skin. He’d paired the shirt with simple navy blue dress pants, and even though he was fairly dressed down for such a swanky wedding, he looked perfect. Absolutely perfect. He was also sporting a three-week beard growth (you try shaving with just your left hand he’d said with a shrug when she’d commented on his mountain man look), which was doing him all kinds of favors.

What? he asked, taking a sip of his drink and glancing around the elegantly decorated ballroom. Do I have something on my face?

No. I was just admiring your beard, she admitted. It suits you. I think you should keep it, even after the cast comes off.

Even though there’s this one place the hair doesn’t grow? he asked, pointing at the faint scar above his lip.

Nah, it adds to the intrigue. How did you get that scar, anyway?

He grinned. I was nine and playing Hungry Hungry Hippos with Levi and Noah. The two of them were being complete animals, bashing the levers with their fists and so I started doing the same thing. Being an absolute pillar of maturity, I decided it was stupid and I gave up just as Levi smashed his fist down on the board and sent it flying right into my face. I needed three stitches and Mom took the game away. Anyway, the moral of the story is never, ever play Hungry Hungry Hippos with Levi.

She laughed. Damn. Guess I’ll have to cross that one off my bucket list.

Sorry to crush your dreams.

Your house must’ve been chaos, with the three of you running around.

He smiled, glancing across the room to where Levi was piling a plate high with appetizers. It was pretty crazy at times. I don’t think there was a single wall that went unscathed. The light in his eyes shifted and he cleared his throat, taking a sip of his drink. Come on, let’s get some food before Levi eats the entire appetizer buffet. He tossed back the rest of his drink and then took her hand, sending a shock of heat up her arm.

No. Squash it. Squash it. SQUASH IT.

Because while she couldn’t seem to control her body’s response to him, he’d never given her any indication that he was A) interested in her romantically, or B) interested in anyone romantically. Ever since his fiancée Jessica had left him practically at the altar, he hadn’t dated, at all. As far as she knew, he was basically a monk. A monk who owned a tattoo shop and rode a motorcycle, but still. A monk.

Although she wouldn’t know if he’d had a one-night stand with someone or whatever…Ugh. Just the thought of it had her stomach twisting itself into uncomfortable knots, and she took a long sip of her drink.

Hey, Hud! called Levi. Come try these vegetarian spring rolls before I eat them all.

They reached the buffet and she was a little embarrassed at how much she didn’t want to let go of his hand. But she did, and they filled their plates, chatting with Levi and Madison about their jobs as paramedics in Manhattan.

What’s the most surprising thing about your jobs? she asked them between bites of bacon-wrapped scallops and crab cakes. She’d thought that the mini quiches and caprese skewers also looked mouthwateringly good, but she’d left the few remaining ones for Hudson, since he could actually eat those. He’d been a strict vegetarian for his entire adult life, and while it wasn’t something she could ever do—saying goodbye to bacon and burgers just wasn’t an option—she admired his dedication to his values.

Levi and Madison exchanged a look before Madison said with a grin, How much stuff people put up their butts.

Violet choked on a laugh, holding her hand in front of her mouth as she nearly swallowed a scallop whole. It took several seconds before she could breathe normally again, and her eyes were running with tears.

A buttload of stuff, deadpanned Hudson, and Violet started choking all over again. She smacked at his good arm while Levi groaned.

Don’t. Don’t make me hurt you.

Why? Is there a game of Hungry Hungry Hippos around here somewhere? Violet managed, making all of them laugh. She loved the way the skin around Hudson’s eyes crinkled when he laughed, and once again, she caught herself staring.

Just then, the reception’s MC asked everyone to take their seats, so she followed Hudson to their table. The bride and groom entered to a round of rousing applause, and Lauren MacKinnon serenaded them with her version of A Thousand Years. As they twirled on the dancefloor, the lights went soft and glowy, as though the entire space was lit by fireflies. For a moment, it didn’t feel as if they were in a swanky ballroom in Manhattan. Everything felt ethereal and magical. The air smelled like delicious food with a hint of something heady and floral. The moving lyrics had tears—emotional ones, not choking ones—stinging her eyes. The way Lucian and Olivia were smiling softly and gazing into each other’s eyes, as though the entire universe existed right there, between them made her chest tighten.

What are you thinking about? Hudson whispered in her ear.

That I want this for myself someday, she answered honestly.

Really? A big wedding like this?

She tore her eyes from the gorgeous couple and turned to face him. He was so close, so beautiful that just looking at him felt like a punch in the sternum. The softly glowing light caught his thick blond hair, his curls short and tamed right now. God, his hair looked so soft. What would it feel like to run her hands through it, just once?

She shook her head. No, not like this. I just mean…look at them. They’re so happy. So in love. I just want…I just want a guy who looks at me like that.

I think you actually have to date to have a wedding.

Ugh. Don’t remind me.

She cocked her head, studying him. She had no idea what kind of wedding he’d planned with Jessica and she never asked about it or brought it up, assuming it was a sore spot. Is this hard for you? she asked softly, not because it was the right time to bring this up, but because she needed to know. If he was hurting, if he needed someone in his corner, if he needed anything, she wanted to help. Which, God, was pretty freaking pathetic. She was like a little puppy dog, following him around with hearts in her eyes, and she needed to stop.

Being at a wedding you mean? he asked, his eyes still on his cousin and his new wife.

Yeah.

His gaze moved to her. No. Not anymore. There was a time when it would’ve been, but…no. He sighed, shaking his head. As much as it sucked, I know I dodged a bullet. She was right to pull the plug. I’d bet everything I have that we’d be divorced by now if we’d gone through with it.

She stared at him, trying to process what he’d just said. A part of her had assumed that he was still pining away for the woman who’d jilted him, and that was why he was single. But if he was over Jessica, then why…

But events like these… He sighed. They make me miss the hell out of my dad.

Her chest ached for him and she reached out, covering his much larger hand with hers. I’m sorry, Hud, she said softly. His skin was warm and a little rough to the touch, and she could see the edges of his inked sleeve poking out from beneath his shirt cuff. I can only imagine how much. She knew that he’d lost his dad at age twelve. She knew that his dad had been a captain with the FDNY, and he’d died when the towers had fallen on September 11 th. But beyond that, she didn’t know much. He didn’t talk about his dad, and she’d assumed it was because he’d lost him so long ago that the pain was forgotten. Now, she was wondering if he never talked about it because the pain was still raw.

Before she could find the right way to ask a question she really, really shouldn’t ask, the dance ended and dinner began, complete with toasts and clinking glasses and copious laughter and cheering. The atmosphere was bright. Upbeat and serene, and Violet wanted to wrap herself in it. Make it a memory that would last, given that she didn’t know the next time she’d get to attend an event like this with Hudson as her date. Probably never.

Dinner consisted of a creamy potato and leek soup, a salad with the most amazing dressing she’d ever tasted, and a mouthwateringly perfect steak. Hudson had pasta with mushrooms and stuffed peppers, and honestly, his looked so good that it almost made her wish she’d chosen the vegetarian option. Almost.

Shortly after dinner, Lucian and Olivia cut the cake and slices were served to everyone, and once the last speech had wrapped up, the dance floor was officially open. Violet felt completely sated—from the wine, the food, the lovely music, the gorgeously decorated ballroom. Sitting next to Hudson and chatting easily with his brothers and their girlfriends, who were both warm and funny. Even though she was a little intimidated by them—Felicity was an English teacher, which made Violet more aware of her own intellectual shortcomings, and Madison looked like a freaking supermodel—they were kind and welcoming to her.

The band started playing an upbeat song she loved, and her eyes flicked to the dance floor, which was quickly filling with people. Violet loved dancing. She loved music and moving her body and the rush of adrenaline that came with a really fantastic song playing at full blast. But she didn’t want to dance by herself—hello, that would be weird, considering she hardly knew anyone there—and she didn’t think Hudson would be up for dancing with his cast. Still, she couldn’t stop herself from shaking her shoulders in her seat a little as she stared longingly at the growing crowd of people getting down.

"You really want to dance, don’t you?" asked Hudson, and when she whirled, there was a small smile on his face.

She hesitated for a second. Um, well. Yeah, I mean, I do. But it’s totally cool if you’re not⁠—

Of course I’ll dance with you, Violet. Come on. I wanna see this dress in action. He leaned in closer, so close that she could feel his warm breath on her neck. It looks amazing on you, by the way. It’s perfect.

She laughed and pushed to her feet, her brightly colored dress swirling around her. She’d found it at a vintage thrift shop in Brooklyn and she’d been worried that it wouldn’t be fancy enough for an event like this, but knowing that Hudson liked it—liked her in it—made her not care what other people thought at all, which was sort of a new feeling for her.

He took her hand, and she knew it was a familiarity she could get used to if she let herself. Leading her onto the dance floor, he pulled her right into the middle of the crowd. The flashing lights caught his dark blond