Roxane Gay Presents Series

The second installment in the series from Everand and Roxane Gay, the beloved bestselling author of Hunger, Bad Feminist, and Opinions. Memoirist, essayist, and novelist Randa Jarrar offers an honest and wholly original user’s manual on how to raise a happy and well-adjusted child with little help and even fewer resources, but a fierce willingness to live out loud. She was a young college student, barely eighteen. As the daughter of overbearing immigrant parents, she reveled in the freedom of being away from home, having fun, spreading her wings. But then she got pregnant. Life as a single mother is a challenge, even in the best of circumstances. If you’re like Randa Jarrar — young, marginalized, yet fiercely determined to get an education and forge a career — it’s seemingly impossible. Yet she did it, and she shares her story in this honest, deeply moving, and profanely funny how-to that parents of any age will find useful not just for raising a happy child but for keeping oneself sane, healthy, and fulfilled. Randa, the author of the acclaimed books A Map of Home; Him, Me and Muhammad Ali; and the memoir Love Is an Ex-Country, came to parenthood with no expectations. As little more than a child herself, with a family who offered criticism but not much else, she more or less made it up as she went. “Raising a child alone and working and going to school is doable,” she writes, “but you will need to do one at a time at first. See: a juggler’s instruction manual.” Jarrar’s own juggling act yielded hard-won lessons you won’t find in other parenting guides. Without a partner or much disposable income, she relied on her wits and common sense to make the best life for herself and her son. As he grew up, so did she, working her way through graduate school, finding community among single moms like herself, and refusing to crumble beneath the societal presumption that, as a brown-skinned woman of limited means, she was doing it all wrong. By holding on to her confidence against all odds, she raised a young man any parent would be proud of while establishing herself as a respected author and professor. But it was far from easy, and Jarrar’s missteps and misadventures offer readers both moments of great wisdom and hilarity. Her moving story, a series of thirty-three short chapters with instructive titles such as “How to Advocate for Your Child” and “How to Explain Easter to Your Muslim Child Who Doesn’t Realize He Is Muslim,” reflects the challenges that come with raising a child on your own. Parenthood, especially single parenthood, is a serious, ridiculous business, and Jarrar shows us there is no one way of doing it right.

Introducing Roxane Gay & Everand Originals, a new series from Everand and the beloved bestselling author of Hunger, Bad Feminist, and Opinions. For the series launch, renowned cookbook author Julia Turshen writes with moving honesty about her years of disordered eating and exercising and how she freed herself from the poisonous cultural conversations about weight, discipline, and how women should look. For most of her life, Julia Turshen has been at war with her body. Raised in a family obsessed with counting calories, she measured self-worth by the numbers on her bathroom scale. As the New York Times bestselling author of beloved cookbooks, including Small Victories and Simply Julia, she loved food and celebrated its social and cultural value, yet like so many women, she was convinced her own value would increase if only she lost ten, twenty, or however many pounds she arbitrarily believed kept her from the best version of herself. She worked out obsessively, using exercise as one more way to maintain control over her body and unruly appetites. Julia’s attitude began to shift during the pandemic when she took a break from writing and book promotion to work on a small local farm in upstate New York. Months spent outdoors, harvesting vegetables and carrying heavy bushels of produce, transformed her body, making it bigger yet stronger. To her surprise, Turshen reveled in her new physique; she reveled in the emotional freedom physical labor gave her to eat without harsh restrictions or self-recrimination. Finally, she was breaking free of the tyranny of unrealistic body image and disordered eating. But when the farm job ended, Julia felt herself slipping back into destructive thought patterns. Determined not to resume her relentless internal battles, she looked for activities that might replicate the joy and strength building farm work gave her. And that is how she discovered powerlifting. Through powerlifting — the precise and careful art of hoisting increasingly heavy weights — Turshen learned to listen to her body and what it needed, be it rest, water, another plate on the barbell, or a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. And she found a community of people, women especially, who embraced the unadultered joy of being physically strong. “I lift for my younger self and wear my singlet now to make up for all the times I wore a T-shirt over a swimsuit,” she writes, “I lift to show people what it looks like to opt out of trying to erase oneself. I lift to show that to myself.” Both a critique of society’s obsession with weight and a beguiling memoir of self-acceptance, Built for This is a timely reminder that all bodies are powerful and deserve celebration.  

The third installment in the series from Everand and Roxane Gay, the beloved bestselling author of Hunger, Bad Feminist, and Opinions. In this fascinating and literally trippy memoir, acclaimed essayist and columnist Gabrielle Bellot shares the story of how magic mushrooms, ayahuasca, and other psychedelics transformed her life for the better. How does a quiet, cautious trans girl, once even nervous about getting tipsy, find herself cooking a pot of ayahuasca — a powerful mind-altering brew from the Amazon — for nearly ten hours? If you’ve ever tried psychedelics or are simply curious to know what they really feel like, you’ll be riveted by Gabrielle Bellot’s charmingly honest and immersive memoir about discovering — and being utterly transformed by — mind-altering plants and fungi. Happily and newly married but plagued by anxiety and professional ennui, Bellot tried magic mushrooms on a whim. The unexpectedly transcendent experience so affected her that she embarked on a personal quest to learn all she could about psychedelics. Little did she know that her research and experiments with psychedelic drug ingestion would have the power of rebirth, helping her shed debilitating self-consciousness, view life and death in new ways, and come to terms with grief, as well as wounds left over from growing up queer in a fiercely traditional Caribbean nation. “I hadn’t imagined that my life, as a whole, was about to change and, with it, some of my basic ways of conceptualizing and interacting with the world,” she writes. “I was about to sail away on a stream of fairy wine into uncertainty itself — and the ‘I’ I’d been before would never fully return.” Over the course of her year-long psychedelic journey, Bellot is amazed by the “new, stronger, more wonder-filled” self that emerges. With the sharp senses of a truly gifted writer, she describes what it feels like to try psilocybin mushrooms, mescaline, cannabis, and ayahuasca (which she makes from scratch in her Dutch oven). Her visions and the mind-opening serenity she experiences are almost palpable. For those who are hesitant to give psychedelics a go, Bellot’s trips are the next best thing. More than that, she gives a detailed and fascinating mini history of mind-altering drugs and those who use them, from our species’ earliest representatives to the Aztecs to Terence McKenna to today’s consumers looking for a natural fix to what ails them. To that end, Bellot also reflects on the complicated nature of the current-day psychedelic renaissance, focusing both on the great potential and grave pitfalls of the movement. My Year of Psychedelics is a call for open-heartedness, open-mindedness, and, above all, the courage to face your fears in a world that could sorely use more of all of these.

The fourth installment in the series from Everand and Roxane Gay, the beloved bestselling author of Hunger, Bad Feminist, and Opinions. Award-winning novelist and essayist Elaine Castillo details her life spent rescuing and training dogs, a story that reveals just as much about modern society and culture as it does our relationship with humankind’s first domesticated animal. Like many of us, Elaine Castillo wasn’t a dog person — until she was. Her conversion came in the form of a flea-bitten, nine-year-old German shepherd with missing teeth and an intense gaze. Xena cracked open Castillo’s heart and ushered her into a new world of mutual love and trust, and eventual heartbreak. Good Girl tells the story of Castillo’s decision to adopt an older dog and of the two precious, life-altering years they spent together. More than the standard life-with-my-dog memoir, it also turns a lens on the long, often fraught relationship humans have had with these animals, dating back to when we first welcomed them to share our fires and food. (Women, she notes, were likely the first to bring dogs into the fold, making them woman’s best friend.) “To trace human history is to trace the history of dogs because, of course, we invented them,” Castillo writes. Good Girl examines and complicates what this invention has meant for both dogs and people. Throughout her essay, Castillo grapples with two of the thorniest issues surrounding dog “ownership” (itself a loaded word): buying versus adopting, and training techniques. What types of dog people choose, where they get them, and how they treat them aren’t just personal decisions — they’re societal barometers. In poorer communities — such as the rural areas that produce the most rescues — dogs are often kept for protection; they are a byproduct of racialized poverty and vulnerability. Some dog breeds, including Castillo’s beloved German shepherds, are inextricably linked to violence and the oppression of marginalized people. German shepherds are also the breed most associated with harsh training methods and the false yet stubbornly resilient alpha-wolf theory that says dogs respond best to dominant (i.e. male) humans. As she points out, the long-standing “teach your dog who’s boss” mode of training is toxic masculinity in microcosm and toxic for the dogs themselves. Castillo uses her own experiences with Xena as well as other dogs she’s adopted or fostered to explore the many ways dogs come into our lives, and how we create space in our lives and our hearts for them. In doing so, she reminds us that dogs are a mirror. They are who they are because of who we are. What if we were better stewards, she writes, “models of gentleness, of play, of responsibility, of care, protection, and mercy. Models of giving away power, of comforting the ailing and injured, of not having to win all the time, of showing tenderness to the vulnerable, of providing for others first. What kind of dog training might that produce? What kind of families, for that matter?” We’re several thousand years too late not to have a complex emotional life with dogs, Castillo argues. Let’s challenge ourselves to do better for the dogs we share our lives with.

In this fifth and final installment in the series from Everand and Roxane Gay, the beloved bestselling author of Hunger and Bad Feminist delivers her own bold and deeply personal exploration of gun culture and gun ownership in America from a Black feminist perspective. In the early 1990s, when she first heard Aerosmith’s hit song “Janie’s Got a Gun,” about a young, sexually abused girl who gets her hands on a gun and can finally avenge herself, Roxane Gay wondered, “if I were facing a flesh and blood person with the cool of a gun’s grip against the palm of my warm hand, would I actually be able to pull the trigger?” So begins a fearless and thought-provoking meditation by a woman who has “no fondness for guns” but nonetheless owns one. Gay lays bare the facts along with her experiences, exploring the uniquely American phenomenon of contemporary gun culture; the horrifying statistics that show the scope of gun violence; the gun industry’s eagerness to target women; the Second Amendment and who is and is not served by it; and what it means to stand one’s ground. Through it all, she tries to reconcile her feminism with gun ownership and makes it clear that while she has joined the ranks of American gun owners, she is not among the converted: “If I had to give up gun ownership to make the world safer, to eradicate all gun violence, I would do so in a heartbeat. Individual rights shouldn’t supersede the greater good. Our safety should not be held hostage by political greed and indifference and impotence. The Second Amendment is not, in fact, sacrosanct—it is a law, written by flawed men, and it should be as subject to change as it is to interpretation. “A gun is a tool,” she writes, “nothing more and nothing less, but I know how to use that tool. I know how to use it quite well, and I will only get better. I own a gun, but I have more questions than answers.”