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L

ets face it weve all been


there The baby screaming in
the car seat in the back just out
of your reach and nothing you
can do about it. Youve tried a pacifier,
playing the radio, singing to your baby,
rolling down the windows, nothing
seems to help. Youre left feeling
helpless to your babys need.
After a few months
the car rides get
easier. Your baby is
able to soothe
themselves by
grasping toys,
looking out the
window, or just
listening to your
voice. The days of
screaming all the
way to the grocery
store are over.
What was it that
changed? Was
there something
that you found that worked? Or did
something change in your baby?
According to Berk (2013) it is around
four to six months of age that infants
begin to self-soothe by shifting their
attention. Temperament effects a
childs ability to self-regulate. Infants
born with an easy going temperament
will have an easier time learning to
regulate their emotions. However,
children born with difficult or slow-to
warm temperaments will need more
time and patience from caregivers.
Empathy begins in infancy with babies
connecting with their caregivers
through face to face interactions.
Often an infant will begin to cry when

hearing the cry of another baby but,


true empathy requires children to
understand that the self is distinct from
other people (p. 417). There are
numerous strategies and ways to help
children develop self-regulation skills.

Tips for Parents

Remember that, this too shall


pass. It is hard to listen to your
infant in distress. Especially
when they are very young. It is
important for caregivers to keep
themselves calm, cool, and
collected in order to respond
appropriately to their child.
As the infant ages it is important
to engage them in face to face
play as well as playing with
objects. This allows them to
develop an understanding of the
world around them. It also gives
them a chance to figure out how
to turn away from overwhelming
stimuli.
As infants are able to move their
ability to self-regulate emotions
increases. Infants are
increasingly more aware of the
choice to, [approach] or
[retreat] from various situations
(p. 410). This realization gives
the infant more control over
themselves.
Lastly, it is very important that
infants in distress are responded
to promptly, with sympathy and
the understanding that their cry
is their way of communicating
that they need something. The
infant may need a diaper
change, to be fed, talked to,

picked up, or just to see a


familiar face.

Behavioral Strategies for Infants


Struggling with Self-Regulation

For young infants a good way to


prepare for self-regulation is
through trial and error. Exposing
the infant to different stimuli
allows both infant and caregiver
to develop a sense of what the
infant responds to in a positive
and negative manner.
Older infants, experience other
types of stressors than stimuli.
As the infant begins to
understand the workings of their
environment they experience
new stresses. Separation anxiety
is a common stress that occurs. A
strategy for aiding an infant in
regulating their emotions is to
play peek-a-boo. Peek-a-boo
helps develops the infants
concept of object permanence,
or that something continues to
exist despite not being able to
see it.

A good start to self-regulation is


important for the future development

of empathy and prosocial behavior. As


children grow and begin to interact
with others they need to have a solid
foundation of experiences from which
to base their self-regulation skills.
Understanding that others have feelings
and that their feelings matter is
important for anyone. Empathy
requires one to, detect different
emotions, to take anothers emotional
perspective, and to feel with that
person, or respond emotionally in a
similar way (Berk, 2013 p. 417).
Infants do not possess the cognitive
processing skills necessary to display
true empathy but with time and
positive modeling from their caregivers
children will develop a strong sense for
others feelings.

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