PartOne Serendipity

A Twelve Step Workbook - Al Kohallek Goes Stepping
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DAY PAGE DAY PAGE DAY PAGE

DAY 1 1 DAY 15 63 DAY 29 105
DAY 2 10 DAY 16 66 DAY 30 108
DAY 3 18 DAY 17 69 DAY 31 111
DAY 4 20 DAY 18 72 DAY 32 115
DAY 5 25 DAY 19 75 DAY 33 119
DAY 6 30 DAY 20 78 DAY 34 122
DAY 7 34 DAY 21 81 DAY 35 128
DAY 8 36 DAY 22 83 DAY 36 132
DAY 9 38 DAY 23 84 DAY 37 134
DAY 10 42 DAY 24 87 DAY 38 136
DAY 11 46 DAY 25 91 DAY 39 141
DAY 12 53 DAY 26 94 DAY 40 143
DAY 13 56 DAY 27 97 APPENDICES 147
DAY 14 59 DAY 28 101
This Forty-Day Program is designed as a guide through the Twelve Steps. Our
goal is to work through this complete Workbook, the first 164 pages of the book
Alcoholics Anonymous and the Twelve Steps of the book Twelve Steps and
Twelve Traditions. This process is not for the light-hearted. It will take a firm
commitment. The benefits are well worth whatever it takes. Once you began stay
with the process even if it takes more than forty days. Do not short or jump a day’
full assignment.
The Twelve Steps, Twelve Traditions and brief excerpts are reprinted with permission of Alcoholics
Anonymous World Services, Inc. Permission to reprint and adapt the Twelve Steps, Twelve Traditions
and brief excerpts does not mean that A.A. has reviewed or approved the contents of this publication,
nor that A.A. agrees with the views expressed herein. A.A. is a program of recovery from alcoholism
only Use of the Steps and Traditions in connection with programs and activities which are patterned
after A.A., but which address other problems, or in any other non-A.A. context, does not imply
otherwise.
When we reprint brief excerpts, these will be footnoted, giving source and page numbers, followed by
“reprinted with permission.”
Jim W. -- 16607 Blanco Road Suite 401 – San Antonio, Texas 78232-1940
210 493 5983 – Fax 210 493 3946 – www.12stepworkbook.org
1
THE TWELVE STEPS OF THE TWELVE TRADITIONS OF

ALCOHOLIC ANONYMOUS ALCOHOLIC ANONYMOUS
The following Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions are reprinted in the original series,
un-altered and un-separated.
1. We admitted we were powerless over 1. Our common welfare should come first;
alcohol that our lives had become personal
unmanageable. recovery depends on A.A. unity.
2. Came to believe that a Power Greater 2. For our group purpose there is but one
than ourselves could restore us to ultimate authority – a loving God as He
sanity. may express Himself in our group
3. Made a decision to turn our will and conscience. Our leaders are but trusted
our lives over to the care of God as servants; they do not govern.
we understood Him. 3. The only requirement for A.A. membership
4. Made a searching and fearless moral is a desire to stop drinking.
inventory of ourselves. 4. Each group should be autonomous except
5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to in matters affecting other groups or A.A. as
another human being the exact nature a whole.
of our wrongs. 5. Each group has but one primary purpose –
6. Were entirely ready to have God to carry its message to the alcoholic who
remove all these defects of character. still suffers.
7. Humbly asked Him to remove our 6. An A.A. group ought never endorse,
shortcomings. finance, or lend the A.A. name to any
8. Made a list of all persons we had related facility or outside enterprise, lest
harmed, and became willing to make problems of money, property, and prestige
amends to them all. divert us from our primary purpose.
9. Made direct amends to such people 7. Every A.A. group ought to be fully self-
wherever possible, except when to do supporting, declining outside contributions.
so would injure them or others. 8. Alcoholics Anonymous should remain
10. Continued to take personal inventory forever nonprofessional, but our service
and when we were wrong promptly centers may employ special workers.
admitted it. 9. A.A., as such, ought never be organized;
11. Sought through prayer and meditation but we may create service boards or
to improve our conscious contact committees directly responsible to those
with God as we understood Him, they serve.
praying only for knowledge of His 10. Alcoholics Anonymous has no opinion on
will for us and the power to carry that outside issues; hence the A.A. name ought
out. never be drawn into public controversy.
12. Having had a spiritual awakening as 11. Our public relations policy is based on
the result of these steps, we tried to attraction rather than promotion; we need
carry this message to alcoholics, and always maintain personal anonymity at the
to practice these principles in all our level of press, radio, and films.
affairs. 12. Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all
our traditions, ever reminding us to place
principles before personalities.
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DAY I - Today is _____ _____ ______
When you start your daily practice you may ask your Higher Power – “Cause me to
have all the honesty, willingness and open-mindedness I may need here and now. I ask,
for the guidance, love and wisdom that I need to work through this process and gain the
most I can at this time. I am as willing as I can be to set aside everything I even think I
know about this area, this way of life so that my chances for an open-mind and to be
teachable are better, and that I may realize Your Three Spiritual Gifts: Awakening to
You, to be the love I am and to be the individual You created me as. Thank You.”
Michelangelo took a rough piece of marble and chipped away everything that did not
look like the vision of David he held in his mind. Working this Program the best you
can will help you chip away much of what is not like your Higher Power’s vision for
you individually. You may experience your heart’s desire, His Will for you.
INDEX FOR THIS DAY ACTION
1. Review the Contents on page 1 of this Workbook; in fact take a few minutes to
review the whole workbook before you start the Daily assignments. Just from
this brief review, what comes to mind? Write it down. After you have finished
this Forty-Day commitment see how your perception differs from the start.
2. Workbook Reading assignment pages 1 through 8 – Underline those things that

were most useful for you and/or caused you to have questions. Write them down.
3. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous is the Preface and all of
the Forewords (Fourth Edition pages xi – xxiii) Average reading time 24 minutes
4. List the most important ideas you can relate to, identify with as a result of today’s
reading; Fourth Edition pages xi – xxiii Alcoholics Anonymous. How do these
ideas directly relate to the area you are currently working this Forty Day
Commitment? Give examples.
5. Today’s reading assignment from Twelve Steps and Twelve Tradition is the
Foreword (pages 15 – 18) Average reading time 7 minutes
6. List the most important ideas you realized as a result of today’s reading; The
Foreword – pages 15 – 18 in Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. How do these
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DAY 1
CAUTION: THIS COULD BE HAZARDOUS TO YOUR OLD WAY OF LIFE.

USE THIS WORKBOOK, OR ANY OF ITS CONTENTS, AT YOUR OWN RISK
.
Doing what’s suggested in this workbook may cause you to let go of some parts of your personal
“reality.” It could cause you to be less limited. You may stop blaming other people, places, and
things. You may stop being a user and become an owner of your own stuff. You may find yourself
giving up some of your old resentments, pains and fears. You could even find yourself with a new
understanding and/or awakening. Maybe you will find your Self. Neither this workbook nor any of its
contents are for sale. They are for sharing. Pass it on freely to those you love and those you don’t.
OUR MISSION - We will introduce you to this set of useful tools; however, tools are worthless unless
we learn how to use them and then use them. Well, that’s what this little workbook is about. Our
main focus will be learning new ways to expand our application of the program. To help you awaken
to the powerful spiritual principles embodied in the Twelve Steps (Recovery), Twelve Traditions
(Unity) and Twelve Concepts for World Service (Service). The main focus of this Workbook will be
on the Twelve Steps. Awakening we believe is the correct word because it does happen as the result
of applying the spiritual principles. We want to dispel the illusion that we are to impose an
understanding by applying the principles found in our program. In fact, we use information and
understanding to help chip away all that is not our God-created self to help us open up and realize our
Spiritual Gifts, our true nature.
POWER - OUR FIRST SPIRITUAL GIFT - “Lack of power, that was our dilemma. We had to find a
Power by which we could live, and it had to be a Power greater than ourselves. Obviously. But
where and how were we to find this Power? Well, that’s exactly what this book is about. Its main
object is to enable you to find a Power greater than yourself which will solve your problem.”
(Alcoholics Anonymous page 45 reprinted with permission) The main object of this workbook is to be
in concert with that. Working the first eleven Steps will assure us of having a personality change, a
shift in our perception sufficient to cause a spiritual awakening. Step Twelve opens with: “Having
had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps…” This spiritual awakening, this Gift, is the
first of our three primary goals of this workbook.
LOVE – OUR SECOND SPIRITUAL GIFT - One of the most common human needs is love. The
second part of Step Twelve is; “…we tried to carry this message.” This is sharing; this is Love. We
give but little when we give of our possessions, it is when we give of ourselves that we truly give. In
the act of giving, “passing it on”, what we have received, we realize that giving and receiving are the
same? In fact, the only way we can become a Master Receiver is to share with others everything we
want for ourselves. We can love because our deepest nature is love. The messenger is the message.
OUR HEARTS DESIRE – OUR THIRD SPIRITUAL GIFT - Awakening to the individual self we
were created to be with purpose and meaning, in other words, to consciously live our Heart’s Desire,
God’s Will for each individual. The third part of Step Twelve is: “…and to practice these principles
in all our affairs.” The only way we can fully realize who we are is to share what we currently are as
the result of this process. When we are God-centered even for a moment we will have all the power
and wisdom we need. In that moment we will be told or shown what to do, say, think and feel in a
way we can currently hear, understand and follow.
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DAY 1
INTRODUCTION TO A FORTY-DAY COMMITMENT
The use of forty days as a time period to effect a change has been around a very long time. Using forty
days for a transformation places us in some very powerful company;
• Noah’s life was transformed by 40 days of rain.
• Moses was transformed by 40 days on Mount Sinai.
• The spies were transformed by 40 days in the Promised Land.
• David was transformed by Goliath’s 40-day challenge.
• Elijah was transformed when God gave him 40 days of strength from a single meal.
• The entire city of Nineveh was transformed when God gave the people 40 days to change.
• Jesus was empowered by 40 days in the wilderness.
• The disciples were transformed by 40 days with Jesus after his resurrection.
If we want to build a new habit and if we consistently practice for forty days we are well on the way to
a new or different life long habit. There is no doubt there is a spiritual purpose in (doing) a 40-day
process of change, but we will see how we can experience transformations at other levels as well -
mentally, physically, emotionally, and socially.
This human condition we live in has many cycles; women are aware of the physical 28-day cycle;
however men go through a 28-day physical cycle also. This 28-day cycle for men is manifested
differently, but there are some parts of this cycle all humans have in common. For example, at times
we feel full of energy and love just doing physical stuff, at other times we feel physically drained of
energy for no identifiable reason. We are suggesting that we have cycles at other levels. For example,
there are times when we are over-flowing with new ideas. At other times we are alert mentally and at
other times we can hardly remember our own name. What about the times when we are so emotionally
sensitive, positive or negative, that we seem to be separated from our “reality” and at other times we
don’t seem to feel much of anything? What about the times we want to be very social and other times
we seem to need to be alone?
This brings us to a very important point. We believe that we pass through these 40-day cycles as a
normal part of this human condition. In building a new habit and then practicing that desired thing
consistently for forty days, we will be practicing it through a set of normal cycle changes. This means
that we would be experiencing this desired thing in the highs, lows and in betweens. We can take any
of life experiences and realize that we react differently as we pass through these normal cycles.
Most of us have experienced what I call resistance movement while we were working through a
growth process. When we really decide to make a real change in our personal “reality”, our resistance
at one level or another pops up. Some of the common forms are- we begin to see this same problem all
around us, at times seemingly getting worse, or it feels like we have stirred a beehive and have
managed to make the bees very angry. At times we may feel elated with the possibility of a new-
enlightened understanding. At other times we are filled with anger at others or ourselves. At times we
are filled with fear of changing and fear of not changing. At times we may feel we are nearing an early
closer and we want to stand on a rooftop and declare a victory. At other times it seems like it will
never end. At times we know something very important wants to come out but does not. If we are
willing even for an instant to totally surrender to the process, a break will happen and we do awaken.
Nothing is ever the same.
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Many of us at one time thought that the sole object of our Program was the overcoming of difficulties,
problems. To limit our Program to problem fixing only is much like judging the power and abundance
of the ocean by a few empty shells on the beach. Knowledge and a better understanding of the
Program can be useful tools if we put them to work. The real object of our Program is to seek and find
a Higher Power that will do for us what we cannot do for ourselves. In turn It will help us awaken, to
realize, to develop our own higher faculties and powers. In other words His will for each of us is
individualized. In reality any learning, awakening is but the preparation for a life filled with a good
amount of joy, happiness and freedom to be our created Self.
An overview. First let us review all of the Forty-Day Commitment’s papers which will give us an
overview of what we are being asked to commit to. Then we will have to decide if we are willing to
make a total commitment to work through this process. We may be asking questions like: What is it?
How does it work? What’s in it for me? Is it for me?
What is it? It is a forty-day program designed to guide us through all of the Twelve Steps of
Alcoholics Anonymous. “A.A.’s Twelve Steps are a group of principles, spiritual in their nature,
which, if practiced as a way of life, can expel the obsession to drink and enable the sufferer to become
happily and usefully whole.” Foreword to the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions.
How does it work? It is suggested that we work on this process at least one hour per day, everyday for
forty days. Yes, this includes weekdays, weekends, and holidays. Forty hours to devote to a life
changing process is a very good investment. When we are building a new habit it is useful to be
consciously consistent. The habits we are seeking to replace run 24/7. Another important reason to
work consistently, on this life changing process, is that we will get into a solution mode. We will find,
after a few days, as we are doing our normal day to day stuff, an important insight will come to mind
about the area we are focusing this forty day process on. As these insights pop up, write or record a
key word or two. This will help us reconstruct this insight later. It is suggested that we carry
something to write or record on while working this process. Each day we will have a daily assignment
with suggestions and tips. Finish this day’s assignment before we go to the next. This means that
some days we may invest more or less than an hour.
Plan of Action. To expand on our first suggestion, set aside at least one hour a day. Make this a firm
commitment. Let everyone know that we would love to have the freedom from all distractions
including the telephone while working on this Forty Day program. We may start our daily practice
with affirmation which will be suggested or create your own, but we believe it will be useful to ask for
guidance from your Higher Power.
Each of the Twelve Steps has a special meaning, in this healing process. They are written in order for
a very good reason. As part of this process each Step prepares us for the next Step in the process. Due
to the fact that some of the Steps are paired up there is a temptation to work them as one and the same.
For example, some of our members will do their 4th Step and 5th Step together, as if these were one
Step. We believe for the best results, take one Step in order at a time. They have much more depth,
and there is a better chance of being honest. The 6th Step and 7th Step are often viewed as one step.
We will experience the difference when we treat them as two individual steps. Doing the 8th Step and
the 9th Step as one step causes special problems. We will go over these pairings when these Steps come
up.
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What’s in it for me? If we will totally commit ourselves to this forty-day process we will never be the
same. We will realize a set of Spiritual Tools that may be used on every area of our life to enrich it.
We will most likely come away with a new depth. So we ask our self is it for me? The only way to
answer that question is to go through this process the best we can here/now, giving it a fair chance to
bring us more happiness, peace and joy.
What will we need to get started? We will need a copy of Alcoholics Anonymous (The Big Book), A
copy of the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions and a copy of this Workbook – Al Kohallek Goes on
A Forty-Day Serendipity Journey (Like all of our workshops, papers, and workbooks This workbook is
free. Contact Jim W. 16607 Blanco Road, Suite 401, San Antonio, Texas 78232-1940. Fax 210 493
3946, email jwillis257@aol.com ) At a later date we will include it on our website
www.12stepworkbook.org for a free download. For information contact our office. A copy of both
Alcoholics Anonymous (Big Book) and Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions can be purchased at a
local A.A. Central Service Office Or Intergroup Office. These two A.A. textbooks may be purchased
in a hardback, soft-cover, on tape and on a computer CD. They both have a wealth of useful
information, so it would serve us well to have our own copy. The Textbook Reference page numbers
for the Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous) will be from the Fourth Edition. As we read our
assignments, underline, highlight or take notes on those ideas most important to us individually. We
will need something to write with and something to write on.
NOTE: If using the First Edition of Alcoholics Anonymous and older printings of the Twelve Steps
and Twelve Traditions or earlier printings of the Workbooks the page numbers will be different. Be
guided by the Chapter Titles instead of the page numbers.
It is important that we read all the suggested assignments. We could say we are filling up our toolbox,
which can be useful for the rest of our life in every area of our life. For each of these suggested
readings we have noted an estimated average time to read that assignment. This will give us an idea
how long the reading will take in a group setting or reading out loud. This is slower than the average
silent reading.
Reading the Preface and the Forewords of the Big Book and the Foreword of The Twelve Steps and
Twelve Traditions at once gives us a new hope and a brief overview of the fellowship growth. When I
came into the Program in 1957, very few knew anything about A.A. In fact, we could safely say we
would have to know someone who knew someone that may have heard of A.A. Now we can find
Alcoholics Anonymous very easily, if we want to. (But) the impact of A.A. on this world is something
to behold. For every one person using the Program for alcoholism it is estimated between six and
seven are using the Twelve Step Program for something other than alcohol. The reason is clear - it
works. Many of us have learned a great deal from observing non-alcoholics applying the Program in
other areas of their lives. Some of us found their successful experience working the Program useful as
we practice these principles in all our affairs.
“At some of these we balked. We thought we could find an easier, softer way. But we could not.
With all the earnestness at our command, we beg of you to be fearless and thorough from the very
start. Some of us have tried to hold on to our old ideas and the result was nil until we let go
absolutely.” “Half measures availed us nothing. We stood at the turning point. We asked His
protection and care with complete abandon.” “Here are the steps we took, which are suggested as a
program of recovery:” pages 58 – 59 Alcoholics Anonymous. Reprinted with permission.
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DAY 1
2. Workbook Reading assignment pages 1 through 8 – Underline those things

that were most useful for you and/or caused you to have questions.
Write them down.
DAY 1
3. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous is the Preface and all
of the Forewords (Fourth Edition pages xi – xxiii) Average reading time 24
minutes
4. List the most important ideas you can relate to or identify with as a result of
today’s reading; Fourth Edition pages xi – xxiii Alcoholics Anonymous. How do
these ideas directly relate to the area you are currently working this Forty Day
8
DAY 1
5. Today’s reading assignment from Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions is the
Foreword (pages 15 – 18) Average reading time 7 minutes
6. List the most important ideas you realized as a result of today’s reading; The
Foreword – pages 15 – 18 in Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. How do these
9
DAY 2 - Today is _____ _____ ______
have all the honesty, willingness and open-mindedness I may need here and now. I ask,
for the guidance, love and wisdom that I need to work through this process and gain the
most I can at this time. I am as willing as I can be to set aside everything I even think I
know about this area, this way of life so that my chances for an open-mind and to be
teachable are better and that I may realize Your Three Spiritual Gifts: Awakening to
You, to be the love I am and to be the individual You created me as. Thank You.”

1. Workbook Reading assignment An Eye (I) Witness Account pages 11 through 13
Underline those things that were most useful for you and/or caused you to have
questions. Write them down.
2. Workbook Reading assignment Useful Information pages 14 through 16
3. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous is The Doctor’s
Opinion (Fourth Edition pages xxv - xxxii) Average reading time 15 minutes.
questions.
reading; Fourth Edition pages xxv – xxxii Alcoholics Anonymous. How do these
Today’s Mission Statement: The healing process begins when we are able to admit, accept, and realize
that we need help, that alone and unaided with our present level of understanding, habits of thoughts
and feeling, in other words our little personal “reality”, we are powerless, without the ability get out of
this box we are in, much less go beyond it. We realize that we cannot consistently manage our
thoughts, feeling or actions in this area. If we are to get out of this box we need someone or something
higher than, different than, other than our self. As we can see, Step One describes our problem.
The Doctor’s Opinion is so very important to our understanding of the process of our Program. It is so
important for those who have any kind of addiction to understand the phenomenon of craving which is
manifestation of an allergy. There is a physical difference between those who have an addiction and so
called normal people. “ALLERGY - The phenomena of physical craving that kicks in with the first
drink of alcohol, slice of cake, pill or any drug, etc. This craving is limited to those with a chemical
addiction. (Six Essential Characteristics page 25) The Doctor’s Opinion and the first four chapters of
Alcoholics Anonymous address Step One and Step Two.
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STEP ONE (Honesty) We admitted we were powerless over alcohol – that our lives had
become unmanageable.
DAY 2
1. Workbook Reading assignment An Eye (I) Witness Account pages 11 through 13
An Eye (I) Witness Account

WHO IS AL KOHALLEK?
Al Kohallek (Alcoholic) his wife, Allienon (Al Anon) and Al’s sponsor Lou-is Pazeniton (Lou is
passing it on) are the main characters in our examples. We will tell part of their journey through this
process, this way of life. Their names have been changed to protect the guilty and the innocent. This
couple and Lou-is represent only three of some eighteen (18) million people using a Twelve-Step
Program for a solution of a wide range of human dis-ease. The General Service Office of Alcoholics
Anonymous was reporting a little over three (3) million active in AA. This means that some fifteen
(15) million around the world were using this way of life for something other than alcoholism. We do
not believe that these fifteen (15) million are using this way of life because they admire alcoholics, nor
would they choose to become an alcoholic as a great way to a spiritual path, or awakening. It would be
safe to say that the majority of those who find their way to the program had tried a number of pathways
first. Al and Allienon, like most others were driven to seek help from their pain, frustration, despair,
and emptiness caused by repeated failures. By the Grace of God, they heard about the program
working for others and they chose to join us. They have found that, “It works, it really does.”
AL SHOWS UP
When we first meet Al, he has problems. Lots of problems! He found a description of himself on
almost every page of the Big Book. Page 52 really nailed him: “We were having trouble with personal
relationships, we couldn’t control our emotional natures, we were a prey to misery and depression, we
couldn’t make a living, we had a feeling of uselessness, we were full of fear, we were unhappy, we
couldn’t seem to be of real help to other people. (The reverse of these bedevilments showed up in the
Promises on pages 83-84). “When we saw others solve their problems by a simple reliance upon the
Spirit of the Universe, we had to stop doubting the power of God. Our ideas did not work. But the
God idea did.” (Reprinted with permission.)
AS YOU CHOOSE
Once there was a very wise man that lived in a small village. There also lived a guy who was very
jealous of the wise man, and he was hell bent on showing him up. One day this guy took a group of
witnesses to confront the wise man. This guy had a small bird in his closed fist. He said to the wise
man, “If you are so wise, tell me this: Is the bird I have in my hand dead or alive?” The wise man
knew if he answered that the bird was alive, this guy would squeeze it to death, and if he answered that
it was dead, he would open his hand and let it fly away. The wise man replied, “It is as you choose."
And so it is with this way of life, this program.
GOING BEYOND THE ENTRY LEVEL
There are endless levels that are available to each of us in this program. It is based on spiritual
principles, which are ever expanding. Our power lies in our decisions and our willingness to follow
through with whatever action we are directed to carry out. We believe that all humans in or out of the
program settle for far too little. We pray that each of us continue to choose to grow, to awaken to
Higher Levels. The following are five general levels that Al and Allienon passed through on their
journey in the program.
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Level One. When Al first came to the program he had been in a living hell. He was experiencing a lot
of fear and pain; Al was grateful that at least some of his destructive behavior, hurting others and
himself had stopped or decreased. He started going to meetings and got a sponsor. He was reading the
Big Book and was in good standing for his first thirty, sixty, and then ninety days. His hopes were
soaring.
Level Two. Al began to realize that others as well as himself were expecting more of him than just not
doing something harmful, useless, or bad. Al’s sponsor suggested to him that he might return to his
primary problem if he did not start working on his Steps. Al applied the Steps to his primary problem,
and it worked. He had a spiritual awakening that caused him to realize that his recovery came to him
by the grace of God through this program.
After this Level Two both Al and Allienon have found some of the Workshops useful on line at
www.12stepworkbook.org.
Level Three. Al and Allienon loved each other very much. But there was a problem. Now that Al had
joined the program and worked the Steps on his primary problem, they seemed to be growing apart
instead of closer. Allienon had been working her own Twelve-Step Program for some time and had
grown a great deal. But she was no longer willing to settle for so little. Al talked to his sponsor about
this. His sponsor suggested that it was time that he applied the program to his relationship with
Allienon. Al went back to Step One and applied the first nine Steps to his relationship as he had done
for his primary dis-ease. He directed all of his responses to the questions toward his relationship in
place of his primary dis-ease. It worked; it really did. Not only was he closer to Allienon, but he was
more committed to their relationship than ever before. In addition, he now had a better understanding
of the program and a much better conscious contact with his Higher Power. Allienon and Al are more
deeply in love now than ever before.
Level Four. Allienon and Al are both very active in their respective programs; both enjoy the
fellowship and have gained a lot of new friends. Their relationship with each other is still going great,
but there is a lot of built up pressure in other areas- finance, their careers, other family relationships,
and dealing with people outside of the program. These areas, he could safely say, left a lot to be
desired.
For the first time, the last part of Step Twelve was driven home “and to practice these principles in
all our affairs.“ It is so easy to fool ourselves into believing that we are indeed practicing these
principles in every area and at every level, but we fall far short of the mark. In fact, far too many get
stuck on level one or two. By working the process of this program both Allienon and Al have learned
how to apply these principles to any area of their life if they choose to. They always start back at Step
One for the area to be worked on and proceed through the Steps in order. They are learning how to
apply the Twelve Traditions to any type of relationship.
Level Five. Most of Al’s prayer life had been more human-centered than God-centered. That is, he
beseeched God to enrich his life here on earth for himself and his loved ones. He asks God to remove
suffering, to provide them with wealth, success and comfort. His prayer life today is God-centered.
Level Five takes him to a whole new way of life. His primary motive at this point is to seek God’s
Will; he prays for the power, love and wisdom to carry it out. Al is learning to practice spiritual
discernment, prayer, meditation, and ways of devotion. He has come to understand that a life centered
in a God-realization is the central purpose of life. Al has lost much of his self-centeredness.
Al does not know of anyone who consistently lives on this level, but he knows many do get to this
level from time to time. Some seem to be at this level more often than not. Al experiences his human
conditions drawing him back to a lower level, but he has learned to choose once again and to place it in
God’s hands.
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Al identifies with page 164 of the Big Book; “We realize we know only a little. God will constantly
disclose more to you and to us. Ask Him in your morning meditation what you can do each day for the
man who is still sick. The answers will come, if your own house is in order. But obviously you cannot
transmit something you haven’t got. See to it that your relationship with Him is right, and great events
will come to pass for you and countless others. This is the Great Fact for us.”
There are three principal attributes at this level. These attributes, Three Spiritual Gifts, are the theme
of this workbook and a fundamental theme of life. These Three Spiritual Gifts are:
1. The Awakening to the Presence of our Higher Power and to be in conscious union with this
Presence.
2. The Awakening to the Love that we are, that all of us are.
3. The Awakening to the individual Self we were created to be, with purpose, and meaning. In
other words, to consciously live Our Heart’s Desire, God’s Will.
We believe that these Three Spiritual Gifts are our true nature, and we shall never be whole until these
have been fully realized. As we continue through this workbook, we will have much more to say of
these Gifts, the why and how to get to them. This workbook is dedicated to that end.
A SIMPLE BUT DIFFICULT SPIRITUAL JOURNEY HOME
Step One starts us off on a healing path by helping us realize that at least one area in our life leaves a
lot to be desired and that we are truly without the power or ability to manage this area alone and
unaided. Step Two reminds us that there is a Power Greater than ourselves that could and would help
us. In Step Three we decide to turn to our Higher Power for that help. Step Four helps us identify and
inventory our personal “reality,” habits of thoughts and feelings. In Step Five we openly share these
findings, and some of our secrets with another human and our Higher Power for the first time! As a
result, we get a whole new perspective. In Step Six we find out just how ready we are to have God
remove the defective patterns, and we give these a “make fun of” name that helps in the process of
taking the power back that we gave them. In Step Seven we humbly ask God to remove the useless,
harmful, or too limited parts of these patterns. Step Eight becomes our plan of action to clear up and
begin the healing of our banged up relationships. In Step Nine we take the action to clear our side of
the street. (After these first nine parts of the healing journey, many of the Promises are coming true.
The Three Spiritual Gifts are becoming a living reality.) Step Ten has given us an Early Warning
Signal System that will make it much quicker and easier to get out and to stay out of the old ruts. Step
Eleven helps us practice consistent conscious union with our Creator’s Will for us and the fact that His
Power is always Present when we turn to Him. Step Twelve represents The Three Spiritual Gifts
realized as a way of awakening, sharing, and living - limited only by our choice. This process helps
awaken us at a place where we have always been, Our Father’s House. Welcome Home!
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DAY 2
2. Workbook Reading assignment Useful Information pages 14 through 16 Underline those things that
were most useful for you and/or caused you to have questions. Write them down.
Useful Information
TEXTBOOKS
The two basic books we will be using are: Alcoholics Anonymous (The Big Book) and Twelve Steps
And Twelve Traditions – Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. New York, NY. These two
books are vital to our growth and understanding of this way of life. Make no mistake; this program is
a way of life. There is an old saying; “If you don’t have the money to buy these books, steal them
before you get too honest. After you start living the program you can make an amends. Both of these
books are available on audiotape.
Big Book is Online – http://www.aainsa.org
We offer a textbook reference for each of the Steps from both textbooks. It is not mandatory that you
read each of these references but it would be wise and useful. It will greatly expand your
understanding of the Steps if you do.
MUST BE PRESENT
This workbook cannot help those who are active in their addictions. We don’t know of any program,
which can help these people. Perhaps it is as simple as this: When the time comes to face the healing
process these people avoid the process via their addiction. Common sense tells us we need to totally
abstain while working on this healing process. The mind that made us sick cannot make us well in its
present state nor under the influence of the addiction. We need something higher than us, different
than us, other than us, that can and will do for us what we cannot do for ourselves. This is a mind
training and Spiritual Awakening Program, so it is important to be consciously present.
YOUR CHOICE
Many of us choose to live in darkness with our eyes closed, our ears stuffed, our fists tightly closed
grasping nothing. We had a closed mind focused on self, our emotions fed with yesterday’s self-
centered fears. We abused our physical bodies and used others selfishly as objects. We looked to
people, places and things for our worth, meaning and purpose. We went for spiritual junk food
because we were so hungry. We tried to control others and ourselves with guilt and punishment. All
of that was living apart from our Three Spiritual Gifts.
CHOOSE ONCE AGAIN
If we are willing to open our eyes, unplug our ears, open our hands to both receiving and giving, let
our emotions flow in loving energy, and be open channels, we will receive everything we need to
awaken. We will find the way and the power to “seek God, clean house, and help others.” We do not
change the Divine Laws when we plant corn instead of wheat, but we do exercise our power of choice.
We can choose, but it is God who creates. So, we choose and leave the results to our Higher Power.
LET’S SET THE RECORD STRIGHT
We have failed many times, but we are not failures. We have been foolish, but we are not fools. We
have done many bad things, but we are not evil. We have been punished and made to feel guilty and
have done the same to others, but now we seek correction for others and ourselves. We have withheld
and withdrawn our love and our Spiritual Gifts, and this caused us to believe that others, even God
were doing the same to us.
14
THE DRUG: GUILT AND PUNISHMENT
The drug of choice for so many otherwise loving, good people is guilt and punishment. It is suggested
that we set aside all guilt and punishment for others and ourselves. Guilt and punishment is much like
alcohol and other drugs. They give us the illusion that we have done something about the problem;
however, we may have a temporary fix at best when in truth nothing has changed at the root of our
problems, our personal “reality.”
We will repeat the same problems until there is real healing. We are asked to seek correction not guilt
and punishment. Remember this; we cannot have an open mind or a new or higher understanding
when we are judging. Judging is a form of projecting our old personal “reality,” not REALITY.
FEARLESS AND THOROUGH
We’re sure you have heard something like this: “If I had known I was going to be around this long, I
would have paid heed to the statement from Chapter Five of the Big Book, page 58, …“we beg of you
to be fearless and thorough from the start. Some of us tried to hold on to our old ideas and the results
was nil until we let go absolutely.” (Reprinted with permission). If our problem is not healed at the
level of conditions and causes (our personal “reality”), then we are likely to exchange one problem for
another or go back to our old problem. More important, we will miss a way of life that can be so
fulfilling.
Our program is so powerful but we cannot know this until we experience its results in our daily living.
Those of us who have experienced the abundance of life in all areas may say something like this, “If I
had it to do over, I would ask more of God, more of the program, and more of myself sooner.”
ME AND MY SHADOW
What most of us see is our own little reflection in that limiting mirror of our personal “reality,” hearing
the hum of our little voice as that “reality.” This image we see and the sounds we hear are so familiar,
so habitual that we often think and feel that “this” is REALITY. At best it is but a shadow of our
Higher Self.
A REMINDER
When I can’t make a conscious contact with my Higher Power, one of the things I find helpful is this: I
remind myself that the food I ate today is being changed into flesh and bones, thoughts and energy and
all kinds of things. If I had all the money in the world and every kind of resource, including the best
brain, I could not reproduce what is going on in the least of us. Yet we have the illusion that we are
without recourse to heal our dilemma. If we will do the best we can to chip away everything that is not
related to our Three Spiritual Gifts, we will be given all that we need for the moment.
WATCH OUT FOR TERMITES
Watch out for the termites, the little day-in day-out stuff. This is a real present danger. These little
guys undermine the foundation of every relationship. Termites destroy more property than all the
fires, floods, wind, and hail, and so it is with relationships. We are forced to do something about the
“big” problems or run away. With the little stuff we don’t have to do anything , or they are not
important enough. In one-way or another, we often stuff these. One termite doesn’t matter, but when
they build up in numbers, watch out. It is best to deal with all problems ASAP.
GIFT OF DENIAL
Denial can be a special gift of grace. Denial does not asked us to address anything until we have the
tools. When we have the tools, it breaks down. When that happens, the denial turns to dishonesty, if
we try to avoid it. Then, it demands our attention.
SIMPLE BUT NOT EASY
Everything is so very simple after we have awakened to it and lived it. It is not easy but it is simple.
Trying to force something to be simple before the awakening can be a problem. Everything is simple
when it is simple but not until then.
15
SAME BEGINNING AND ENDING

We took a look at every important relationship in our life: lover, friends, business, etc. They all seem
to begin and end the same way. All began like this: “If I believe that you believe in me, we have a
deal.” The beginning of the end is like this: “I no longer believe that you believe I am special.” Who’s
the Source? Not God.
USEFUL CORNY SAYINGS

The following lists are some of the corny sayings that have been around a long time:
1. If you don’t want to slip, stay away from slippery places.
2. He who lies down with puppies will get up with fleas.
3. “One cannot teach an old dog new tricks.” The good news is this: We’re not old dogs, nor is our
program a bag of tricks.
4. If “ifs” and “buts” were candy and nuts, we would all have a merry Christmas.
5. The mind that made us sick will not make us well alone and unaided.
6. It is not the passing of time that changes things but what takes place during the passing of time.
7. Trading one addiction for another is like changing seats on a sinking ship.
8. To say I am an alcoholic and a drug addict is like saying I am from San Antonio and also from
Texas.
9. There is a stage one may go through in the program; they talk in a bumper sticker dialog and
oversimplify.
10. What we need is more backbone and fewer wishbones.
KEEP AND OPEN-MIND
Many of us are so fearful of change that we resist anything that is the least bit different from our own
personal “reality.” Anything new or unfamiliar will seem out of place until we have experienced it.
“There is a principle which is a bar against all information, which is proof against all arguments and
which cannot fail to keep a man in everlasting ignorance –that principle is contempt prior to
investigation.” (Herbert Spencer) Reprinted with permission.
SPIRITUAL PRINCIPLES EXPAND WITH USE
“A.A.’s Twelve Steps are a group of principles, spiritual in their nature, if practiced as a way of life
can expel . . . . ." (Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions). Something spiritual will expand with its use.
Material and ego things deteriorate with use.
WHO’S JOB IS IT?
What we can do is our responsibility. How do we know if we can or cannot? We try.
Everything else is God’s responsibility.
JUST ONE TIME
The more active we are in the program, the sooner our denial breaks down. No matter how honest we
were with our first set of Steps, we were able to see only a little. More will be revealed. Each time we
work the Steps the better we get at it, so return to the Well as needed.
PRACTICE THESE PRINCIPLES
“To practice these principles in all our affairs” as our Step Twelve implies, we will be dealing with a
lot of different areas in our lives. Something with many parts makes that something complex, but it
does not have to be complicated. This Step work will help us identify many of our parts, not as apart
from the whole, but included in our whole being. To over-simplify is to be under the illusion, as many
of us are, that all we need to do is stop drinking (or stop something) and all would be well.
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WINNERS – LOSERS
We hear in meetings “stick with the winners.” Who are these winners? The winners are those who are
living the solution. Who are the losers? The losers are those that are still getting ready for the
program (practicing their illness). So we could say that winners and losers are the same person at
different points in the process. A very sad fact is that most of those losers never make the cut. Since
you are here, I would suggest that you stay and forgo any additional sick prep work.
CHANGING
Many of us could only see our own little reflection in that limited mirror of our personal “reality”,
hearing only the hum of our own little voice as that “reality.” If we are tired of seeing our own little
reflection and hearing the hum of our little voice, then where do we go from here? Our little personal
“reality” must change. But how? That is what this workbook is all about.
DAY 2
3. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous is “The Doctor’s
Opinion” (Fourth Edition pages xxv - xxxii) Average reading time 15 minutes
today’s reading; Fourth Edition pages xxv – xxxii Alcoholics Anonymous. How do
17
DAY 3 - Today is _____ _____ ______
have all the honesty, willingness and open-mindedness I may need here and now. I
ask, for the guidance, love and wisdom that I need to work through this process and
gain the most I can at this time. I am as willing as I can be to set aside everything I
even think I know about this area, this way of life so that my chances for an open-
mind and to be teachable are better and that I may realize Your Three Spiritual Gifts:
Awakening to You, to be the love I am and to be the individual You created me as.
Thank You.”
Today’s Mission Statement: Bill W. is the co-founder of Alcoholics Anonymous.

Reading his story will give us a deeper insight into the disease and the solution. We
most likely identify with some of his story; if we read through the whole book we
will find a great many things we can identify with. Al Kohallek identified with so
much of Bill’s story that he told his sponsor, Lou-is Paziniton, that the next time we
have a new edition of the Big Book the title of this chapter should be changed to Al
K’s Story.
Al: I was in A.A. about six months before I caught this disease of alcoholism. I had
never even heard the word “alcoholic” until I came into A.A. much less what it
meant, but if you ask me if I were one I would say, sure maybe the worse one here. I
only said that so if anyone said anything about my resistance to the Program to my
family, they would have to report that I was agreeing to everything. The more
meetings I went to and the more I shared with other A.A. members the easier it was
for me to identify with other alcoholics. I have come to realize that a big part of A.A.
is our ability to identify with other Alcoholics.
DAY 3
1. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous is Bill’s Story (Fourth
Edition pages 1 - 16) Average reading time 31 minutes. Underline those things
today’s reading; Fourth Edition pages 1 - 16 Alcoholics Anonymous. How do
18
19
DAY 4 - Today is _____ _____ ______
have all the honesty, willingness and open-mindedness I may need here and now. I
Thank You.”
1. Workbook Reading assignment Introducing Step One page 21. Underline those
things that were most useful for you and/or caused you to have questions. Write them
down.
2. Workbook assignment is working the Six Essential Characteristics of Alcoholism
and other addictions page 21. Write out your response to the Six Essential
Characteristics.
3. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous is There is a Solution
(Chapter 2 Fourth Edition pages 17 - 29) Average reading time 24 minutes.
questions.
today’s reading; Fourth Edition pages 17 - 29 Alcoholics Anonymous. How do these
5. Responding to each of the Six Essential Characteristics of alcoholism and other
addictions, both substance and non-substance addictions on page 25, will give you
some insights into your dis-ease, and point the way to recovery. If we do not get to
the conditions and causes of our addictions we may not get over that addiction or we
may remain dry but may not be joyous, happy and free about it.
Today’s Mission Statement: Today’s reading from the Big Book, There Is A Solution, like each of
the suggested readings will add to and enrich our toolbox. What each of us has in common is not
only the dis-ease as is often thought, but the solution.
Everyone has a Special Gift to give to others and to themselves. If we could be still and listen to the
wisdom of our heart, we would know what that it is. The secret of happiness is to know and use
your Special Gift. The secret to abundance is to give your Special Gift to others. If this is true why
are we not experiencing that Special Gift? Most likely we have made up or gone along with a lot of
sick illusions. Step One is a beginning tool in this process, which can help remove illusions and
obstructions that seem to block your Special Gift so that the natural healing can take place. When
we reach a place in our life where we realize our powerlessness to change with our present
understanding and our inability to be still and if we are willing to seek help, it will come.
20
1. Workbook Reading assignment Introducing Step One page 21. Underline those
things that were most useful for you and/or caused you to have questions. Write them
down.
STEP ONE (Honesty) We admitted we were powerless over alcohol – that our lives
had become unmanageable.
ALWAYS START AT STEP ONE
If we had previous success working our Twelve-Step Program, we realize it’s time to reapply the
program to another area of our life. One is tempted to jump over the first three Steps and start on
another inventory. If we jump over the first three Steps, there is a strong likelihood that we will not
have near the success with the rest of the program. We strongly suggest that when one has made a
decision to work this process on a “new” area, always start at Step One. It is important that we
come to the realization that we are unable with our present understanding, alone and unaided, to
truly experience any real change. We need to realize that we are powerless and we cannot manage
our life very well with our present mindset. The mind that made us sick or limited cannot make us
whole or well (Step One).
Al: Once I have admitted that I am powerless and that I cannot manage my life, then why do it
again?
Lou-is: Our mind plays tricks on us. This is a good example where we worked the Steps on one
area, and then we generalize that experience to cover all areas of our life. It would be like we had
experienced some success at our job and then think that we should automatically be successful in
every area of our life. A person new in the program will often experience a lot of highs and lows,
directly or indirectly, due to generalizing.
INCREASE THE PAIN

We have set up the First Step in a way that will help increase the pain of holding on to that which
we need to have changed, healed, or transformed. The questions will contrast back and forth: What
will it cost us if we do not change? What may we gain if we do experience change?
Al: I don’t want nor need any more pain.
Lou-is: Then get busy.
SIX ESSENTIAL CHARACTERISTICS

In general, there are six essential characteristics of alcoholism, and other addictions. Being aware
of these can help us understand a little better what path our problems take. These may be helpful in
raising our “bottom.” In other words, they help our denial break down, if we are ready. These
characteristics apply to most problem areas not just the chemical addictions, but sick, harmful,
addictive relationships and many others.
The following is to be used as part of our First Step. The idea is to help raise our “bottom”, in other
words, to help break down our denial. We want to increase our awareness of the dynamics of our
problem and to increase the pain of holding on to it. Skip the first one, “Allergy”, if the area you
are working on is an area other than a form of chemical addiction, such as any form of non-
substance addictions, i.e. money, sex, work, etc.
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SIX ESSENTIAL CHARACTERISTICS OF ALCOHOLISM, AND OTHER ADDICTIONS
1. ALLERGY - The phenomena of physical craving that kicks in with the first drink of alcohol,
slice of cake, pill or any drug, etc. This craving is limited to those with a chemical addiction.
Al: For the first time I understand that I have an allergy to a number of chemicals not only alcohol,
which set up a physical craving for more and more. I experienced this physical craving after having
only a drink or having a smoke or drink a Dr Pepper.
Have you realized your Triggers? What are they?
2. PROGRESSIVE - Tolerance: takes more to get the job done or we are unable to get by with
what we once did. With non-substance addictions it takes more money, sex, work, etc.
Al: The last year that I drank I had graduated to pints or half pints, telling myself that I would only
drink that and no more but I did. I was fooling myself about my alcoholism progressing. On top of
my drinking problem getting worse so was my insane jealousy problem progressively getting really
bad, to the point I did not have a moment of peace, which seemed to call for drinking more.
How has your dis-ease progressed? Does it take more or does it take less to hurt more?
3. SELF-DELUSION - Starts with denial, then repression, and then mind games, rationalizing, then
comes the conscious lying. The rationalizing and consciously lying really do a job on our trust,
self-esteem, respect and self-respect. At all cost we must keep our addictive behavior going.
Al: I don’t know what I would have done without denial. If I had realized one more failure in the
early days of AA I would have killed myself. When my denial broke down I could not fool myself
about addictions any more. But by then I had little or no trust, respect or self-respect left.
What has been your experience with self-delusion?
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4. DISTORTION OF ATTENTION - Preoccupied with the object of our addiction or attachment,

we cannot think of anything else but stuff connected with the addiction or the person or thing we are
attached to. The distortion becomes our ULTIMATE CONCERN. Another word for it is
“idolatry." The addiction becomes our god.
Al: When I was still drinking I could not stop thinking where and how my next drink was coming.
My obsession about the drink was indeed my ultimate concern, my god. When I was in my
jealousy insanity my obsession was much like my drinking, I had to be reassured that my wife was
not with someone, so I would track her down.
Can you give an example of this type of thinking and feeling?
5. LOSS OF WILLPOWER - Each time our willpower fails, with our best intentions, we feel even
more hopeless, useless, and worthless. The greatest damage to self-esteem comes from repeated
failures at trying to change addictive behavior. It really hurts when we try our best to stop and
cannot.
Al: The last year I drank I really tried everything I could find to do and I failed to stay stopped. I
had held back from a total commitment not to drink for sometime and when I did totally commit not
to drink every again I really got depressed because I could not stay stopped. As for the insane
jealousy I promised myself and my wife I would never, never, never accuse her of sleeping around
again but I could not keep my promise. Much like my alcoholic drinking I could not handle my
jealousy problem with willpower.
Can you give examples of your loss of your willpower?
6. WITHDRAWAL - "They are restless, irritable and discontented, unless they can again
experience the sense of ease and comfort that comes at once by taking a few drinks" or a few bites,
etc. Our addiction becomes part of our automatic nervous system the more we repeat the behavior.
We have in some cases enlisted billions of our body and brain cells. THE ADDICTION BECOMES
OUR "REALITY". Our mind says; "Play it again, Sam." When the body/mind is deprived of
something it has become accustomed to, it responds with danger signals, as if something is wrong.
Then we have the backlash or rebound. There is a natural rebound for the human condition in any
growth cycle. We can go just so far and our personal “reality” tells us to come “home”. This
natural rebound will most often happen after we have had a peak experience, and if we do not
understand the rebound cycle we are likely to question the peak experience as being real. “How
could I feel so down after such a great high?”
23
Al: To me this rebound thing was the first sign of my insanity. I could be so sure I had it under
control and then for seemingly no reason I would get an uncontrollable obsession to drink or in the
case of the jealousy thing I just “had to know”.
State your rebounding experience when you tried to withdrawal form your addiction.
1. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous is There is a Solution

(Chapter 2 Fourth Edition pages 17 - 29) Average reading time 24 minutes.
reading; Fourth Edition pages xxv – xxxii Alcoholics Anonymous. How do these
24
DAY 5 - Today is _____ _____ ______
When you start your daily practice you may ask your Higher Power – “Cause me
to have all the honesty, willingness and open-mindedness I may need here and now. I
mind and to be teachable are better so that I may realize Your Three Spiritual Gifts:
Thank You.”

1. Workbook Reading assignment for Step One begins on page 26. Underline those
things that were most useful for you and/or caused you to have questions. Write
them down.
2. Workbook assignment is working the Step One Questions page 26. Write out your
response to these questions.
3. Today’s reading assignment from the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions (The
Chapter Step One pages 21-24) Average reading time is 7 minutes. Underline
those things that were most useful for you and/or caused you to have questions.
today’s reading; Step One from the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. How
do these ideas directly relate to the area you are currently working this Forty Day
Today’s Mission Statement: Reading Step One in the Twelve Steps and Twelve
Traditions will give us a better overview of Step one, as you respond to the Step One
questions starting on page 30. These questions will contrast back and forth from
what we could gain by having this area changed, healed, or transformed and what it
will cost us if we do not change. At the end of these questions we are most likely to
be able to realize the fact that if we could have changed by our self we would not be
doing this 40-day Commitment.
Al: My sponsor had pointed out to me that I must admit my powerless over my limited personal
“reality” and that my life had become unmanageable if I were going to be able to realize this way
of life. My personal “reality” had failed me over and over again. My “reality” has a lot of
limiting, useless, even harmful habits of thoughts and feelings. These often give me the illusion that
my Higher Power is not always present, nor do I seem to want Him to be at times. I could not
experience the fullness of love, and I feared that I did not have any real individual purpose or
meaning. I am now willing to commit to this process, the best I can and leave the results to the
Boss.
25
STEP ONE - (HONESTY)
WE ADMITTED WE WERE POWERLESS OVER ALCOHOL - THAT OUR LIVES
HAD BECOME UNMANAGEABLE.
This program is designed to remove obstructions and create an environment where the natural
healing, wholeness, and awakening can take place. The principles that cause the healing are found
in the process of doing and living these suggestions. Action is the magic word.
This process of healing begins the same way in any area of our life to which we may choose to
apply it. It begins with the realization that we are powerless to change, alone and unaided. The
mind set that made us sick will not, cannot make us well. We must want a change in our life, not
just need it, or we will not go to any length to get it. Many of us have been around the program for
some time and at the first sign of a problem, we want to jump into an inventory. We are suggesting
that anytime we realize we are falling short of the way of life we really want to live in any area, we
start at Step One and take the first nine Steps in order. A dentist had a sign in his office, “Only floss
those teeth you want to keep”. We are saying: only practice this program in the areas of your life
that you want to be joyous, happy and free.
It is suggested that you keep your response to the questions or statements on one important area at a
time, for example your drinking problem. Write that important area in the box at the top of each
page to remind yourself of that area. Questions for Step One:
2. Workbook assignment is working the Step One Questions page 26. Write out your response to
these questions.
Al: I really need to work this Program on my primary disease, alcoholism and three other areas, my
jealousy for one, which I keep drinking and doing insane stuff. I was told long ago that I just could
not get along with others, which is so true, so I need to apply this Program on relationships. Then
there is my violence. After I talked to Lou-is Pazeniton, my sponsor, I decided to follow his
suggestion, that is, first things first, which means I better focus on sobriety first. If I don’t stay
stopped drinking none of the rest will matter. He assured me that when he first worked the Program
he got some healing in those other areas. He reminded me that this Program is based on Spiritual
Principles and can be applied to any human condition, which he later did and still does. I can
always go back and work the Program focusing on these other areas. In fact he told me the more
often we work this Program the more skillful we get.
1. List those things you want changed. Choose one.
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2. What pain or fear do you associate with changing this area?
3. What pleasure are you getting out of not changing?
4. What will it cost you if this does not change?
5. What are the benefits you could gain by having this changed?
6. How has this problem area placed your important relationships in jeopardy? (Example)
7. Have you lost self-respect and/or reputation due to this problem?
8. Has this problem made your home life unhappy?
1. Has this problem caused any type of illness? (Example)
27
10. Do you turn to the type of person that enables you to practice this problem or to lower
companions that enable you?
11. What part of this problem do your loved ones, friends, family or business associates object to
the most?
12. What type of abuse has happened to you and/or others due to this problem? (Example)
13. List examples of what you have done to try to fix, control or change this area in your life?
14. What are the feelings, emotions, and conditions you have tried to alter or control with this
problem?
15. At this time ask yourself, “If this is such an important area in my life, why haven’t I changed?
16. Am I now willing to do whatever it takes to have this changed, healed, or transformed?
28
17. If your answer to number 16 is YES write out the First Step: I admit I am powerless over
(whatever you are working the Steps on), that my life in this area is unmanageable. I cannot, with
my unaided will and present understanding, consistently manage this problem area.
3. Today’s reading assignment from the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions (The Chapter Step
One pages 21-24) Average reading time is 7 minutes. Underline those things that were most useful
for you and/or caused you to have questions.
today’s reading; Step One from the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. How do
29
DAY 6 - Today is _____ _____ ______

Thank You.”
1. Workbook Reading assignment Step Two page 30. Underline those things that
were most useful for you and/or caused you to have questions.
2. Workbook assignment is working the Step Two page 31 - 32. Write out your
response to these two questions, a and b.
3. Today’s reading assignment from the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
(The Chapter Step Two pages 25 - 33) Average reading time is 17 minutes.
questions.
today’s reading; Step Two from the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions.
How do these ideas directly relate to the area you are currently working this
Forty Day Commitment? Give examples.
STEP TWO (HOPE) CAME TO BELIEVE THAT A POWER GREATER THAN OURSELVES
COULD RESTORE US TO SANITY.
Today’s Mission Statement: We are reminded that Step One shows us our problem - we are
powerless over our little personal “reality”. That is, we are without the ability to change our habits
of thoughts and feelings alone and unaided. When we fall back into one of our ruts, habits, we are
unable to consistently manage our thoughts, feelings, or actions. Step Two tells us what the
solution is. We need to find, to awaken to a Power Greater than ourselves. So how do we do this?
How do we get from Step One, the problem, to Step Two, the Solution? Well that’s what our other
ten Steps, the fellowship, and the rest of our program can do for us, if we are willing.
The way these Steps are setup in our Workbook helps the following Steps be more useful, more
effective. For example in Step One we realize that we cannot alone and unaided change this area in
our life. Now in Step Two we are told that we will come to believe that a Power Greater than we
COULD restore us. In Step Two we are asked to write down the ways we have already received
God’s grace. So when we get to Step Three we are already aware of this Higher Power helping a
person as I am.(like me?) This makes it easier to cross the bridge to surrender everything, even if it
is only one hour at a time.
30
2. Workbook assignment is working the Step Two page 31- 32. Write out your response to these
two questions a, and b.
Al: After I finished Step One I could see clearly that I have had an invisible means of support even
at my worse. I should have been killed or locked up; so I have to believe that my Higher Power has
some purpose for me. I began to recount the many times something was helping me, caring for me
when I could not. What about the times I came to, not knowing where I was or how I got there or
whom I was with? I remembered a number of doors were closed to me I thought I wanted to stay
open and a number of doors were open for me that I never thought could be open. In both cases I
was wrong and if I had got my way I would not be here today. In one-way or another each one
moved me into the path of A.A. I am so grateful for that Invisible Means of support.
a). Would it be possible for you to recall the times when you experienced that a Power Greater
than yourself did for you what you could not do for yourself? Write out as many of these
experiences as you can and be precise. If you cannot recall an experience related to the area you are
presently working on, any experience with your invisible means of support will do.
31
Al: My sponsor suggested that I carry a note pad with me while I am working this Program. I am
so glad I have done this, because I found that as I went through my day I would have important
memories come to mind or into my experience and by bed-time I could not remember them. It really
found it useful to write just one or two key words and later I could reconstruct the idea or event. I
am surprised how many things I have to be grateful for.
b). List as many ways as you can of anything that you are grateful for, from the least important to
the most important. We want to begin to build a new habit of gratitude in our everyday life. We are
suggesting that you keep this running list of “I am grateful for:” for at least 40 days.
I AM GRATEFUL FOR:
32
3. Today’s reading assignment from the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions (The Chapter Step
Two pages 25 - 33) Average reading time is 17 minutes. Underline those things that were most
useful for you and/or caused you to have questions.
today’s reading; Step Two from the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. How do
33
DAY 7 - Today is _____ _____ ______
Thank You.”

1. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous (The Chapter Three
More About Alcoholism, pages 30 – 43) Average reading time is 27 minutes.
Underline those things that were most useful for you and/or caused you to
have questions.
today’s reading; from Alcoholics Anonymous. How do these ideas directly
relate to the area you are currently working this Forty Day Commitment?
Give examples.
Today’s Mission Statement: If we are working this 40-day Commitment on

something other than alcoholism we could “change” the chapter title to “More About
[your area of concern]”. We are addressing the human condition, so a rose by any
other name is still a rose.
Al: The story about the jay-walker is the message that got to me. As it states on page 37 Alcoholics
Anonymous “Our behavior is as absurd and incomprehensible with respect to the first drink as that
of an individual with a passion, say, for jay-walking. …He enjoys himself for a few years in spite
of friendly warnings.” I too had some friendly and not friendly warnings. “…Luck then deserts
him and he is slightly injured several times in succession.” If I had any luck left at all, it was bad.
In the last year I drank I got into the really??? stuff and yet it did not stop my drinking for more than
a day or two. “…He shuts himself up in an asylum, hoping to mend his ways. But the day he
comes out he races in front of a fire engine, which breaks his back. Such a man would be crazy,
wouldn’t he?” I withdrew from everyone hoping I would mend my ways but as soon as I tried to be
around others I would drop back into an old sick rut. Yes I now understand why I must be restored
to sanity, if I ever was sane. I feel like I need to do whatever it takes to live this Program, this way
of life if I’m going to stop being a jay-walker, spiritually, mentally, physically, emotionally and
socially.
34
1. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous (The Chapter Three More About
Alcoholism, pages 30 – 43) Average reading time is 27 minutes. Underline those things that were
most useful for you and/or caused you to have questions.
today’s reading; from Alcoholics Anonymous. How do these ideas directly relate to
the area you are currently working this Forty Day Commitment? Give examples.
35
DAY 8 - Today is _____ _____ ______
Thank You.”
1. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous (The Chapter 4 We

Agnostics, pages 44 - 57) Average reading time is 27 minutes. Underline
today’s reading; from Alcoholics Anonymous. How do these ideas directly
relate to the area you are currently working this Forty Day Commitment on?
Give examples.
Today’s Mission Statement: Many of us had difficulty with the idea that the solution
to our problem is to find a Power Greater than ourselves. With most compulsive,
addictive kind of folks we could be an atheist, agnostic, and a true believer in the
same hour on a given day. This reading will not take this problem away but every
little bit will help.
Al: On page 45 Alcoholics Anonymous is the most wonderful message I can ever
remember. I had realized just how incompetent I was went I first got out of the
hospital drying out. Not only did I feel like a failure in every area of my life, I had
proof of it. “Lack of power, that was our dilemma. We had to find a power by which
we could live, and it had to be a Power greater than ourselves. Obviously. But
where and how were we to find this Power?
Well, that’s exactly what this book is about. Its main object is to enable you to find a
Power greater than yourself which will solve your problem.” Even though at first I
could not believe it could be for me, I wanted it and needed so much. I have had a
few miracles happen since I came in the Program so to a small degree I know it is
true. We can find a Higher Power by which we can live.
36
1. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous (The Chapter 4 We Agnostics, pages
44 - 57) Average reading time is 27 minutes. Underline those things that were most useful for
you and/or caused you to have questions.
2. List the most important ideas you can relate to or identify with as a result of today’s reading;
from Alcoholics Anonymous. How do these ideas directly relate to the area you are currently
working this Forty Day Commitment? Give examples.
37
DAY 9 - Today is _____ _____ ______

mind and to be teachable are better. That I may realize Your Three Spiritual Gifts:
Thank You.”

1. Workbook assignment page 39 - 41 Underline those things that were most useful
for you. Write your response to questions 1through 4.
2. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous is from the Fourth
Edition pages 58 – bottom page 63) Average reading time 12 minutes. Underline
today’s reading; Fourth Edition pages 58 - 63 Alcoholics Anonymous. How do
4. Today’s reading assignment from Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions is Step
Three (pages 34 - 41) Average reading time 14 minutes. Underline those things
5. List the most important ideas realized as a result of today’s reading; pages 34 – 41
in Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. How do these ideas directly relate to the
area you are currently working this Forty Day Commitment? Give examples.
Today’s Mission Statement: If we are able to remember from Step Two’s exercise some of the ways
our Higher Power has done for us what we could not do for ourselves, then Step Three is going to
be a cake-walk.
Al: I have heard HOW IT WORKS so often in A.A. meetings I am surprised that I make a point to
listen to it as if it were the first time. When we get to the abc’s, I love repeating it silently and in
some meetings openly. (a) That we were alcoholic and could not manage our lives. (b) That
probably no human power could have relieved our alcoholism. (c) That God could and would if He
were sought.
STEP THREE (Faith) MADE A DECISION TO TURN OUR WILL AND LIVES OVER TO THE
CARE OF GOD, AS WE UNDERSTOOD HIM.
38
Workbook assignment page 39 - 41 Underline those things that were most useful for
you. Write your response to questions 1through 4.
What we believe is “good” is more likely to limit us than the “bad”. With the “bad” we are more
likely to toughen up to it, get used to it, or get away from it. With the “good” we are likely to settle
for too little. While you are directly working on these Steps, we ask that you be willing to turn
everything over to Your Higher Power, everything you even think or feel you know or don’t know-
everything. The purpose for this is an open mind and a hope for a new understanding. Otherwise,
we can see only our little reflection in that limited mirror of our personal “reality,” hearing only the
hum of our little voice as that limited “reality.” In other words, we will be working out of our past
instead of the present in the Presence.
Making a decision may run to the extremes, from a total commitment to a meaningless gesture.
Even if we are totally committed to change but we have the same old personal “reality,” then
nothing has really changed yet. This means that we are likely to fall back into one of our old ruts,
habits. If we say to ourselves, “I’m going to do this thing come hell or high water,” and fail to live
up to our promise, which is very likely because our old habits are still running on automatic, we will
even feel worse about ourselves.
This, by the way, is one of the main characteristics of addictions (p10), the loss of willpower. Each
time our willpower fails, with our best intentions, we feel even more hopeless, useless, powerless,
and worthless. The greatest damage to our self-esteem comes from repeated failures at trying to
change addictive, habitual behavior alone and unaided. It does not hurt much until we really try our
best to stop, to change and cannot. This really trying alone and unaided with the same old personal
“reality,” is one of the main causes of our hitting our personal bottom. It gets us ready for this
Program and for sure a Higher Power.
“There is only one key, and it is called willingness. Once unlocked by willingness, the door opens
almost of itself. Looking through it, we shall see a pathway with an inscription. It reads: This is the
way to a faith that works.” (Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, Step Three reprinted with
permission)
There were ten black birds on a wire. One decided to fly. How many were left? Ten. One
decided but none flew. That was a meaningless gesture.
Al: When I first took a look at Step Three I knew it was going to be a problem. When I made an
important decision it was like I was giving my word and giving my word to a Higher Power was
frightening to say the least. What was going to happen to me if I could not keep it? And, as I soon
found out, I could not keep my word or my promise to my Higher Power or to myself, and I had
been raised to believe a man had to keep his word or he was worthless. I had not worked on the rest
of the Steps so I had not identified my defects much less had them cleared away. Yes, I was to fail.
I had a realization when I was taking Step Two that I have had a merciful invisible means of support
for a long time; other wise I would have been dead or in jail. In Step Two I had written very
specific events where someone or something Higher than me was doing for me what I could not do
for my self. So when I did make decision to turn everything over to a Higher Power, it was that
Higher Power who had already helped me. That was very helpful; however my giving my word and
not being able to keep it caused me big problems. I knew I had to work the rest of the Steps
beginning with Step Four.
39
1. State what it means to you when you make an important decision. Give an example.
2. State what is this “will” and “life” you are asked to turn over.
3. State what “to the care of God” means to you.
4. State what “as you understood Him.” means to you
2. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous is from the Fourth

Edition pages 58 – bottom page 63) Average reading time 12 minutes. Underline
today’s reading; Fourth Edition pages 58 - 63 Alcoholics Anonymous. How do these
40
4. Today’s reading assignment from Twelve Steps and Twelve Tradition is Step
Three (pages 34 - 41) Average reading time 14 minutes. Underline those things that
5. List the most important ideas you realized as a result of today’s reading; pages 34
– 41 in Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. How do these ideas directly relate to
41
DAY 10 - Today is _____ _____ ______

Thank You.”
CONTENTS Page CONTENTS Page
Introduction To Step Four 43 Forgiveness List Boxes [Supplement p62] 61

Format Step Four Inventory 46 My Part List Boxes [Supplement p65] 64
Asset List Boxes (Take out) 50 Affects My List Boxes [Supplement p65] 64
My Part/Affects My (Take out) 51 Fear List Boxes [Supplement p68] 67
Step Eight Worksheet (Take out) 52 Harms List Boxes [Supplement p71] 70
Asset List Boxes [Supplement p55] 54 Rules/patterns Worksheet [Supplement 73
p74]
Resentment List Boxes [Supplement p58] 57 Rules/Patterns List Boxes 75

1. Workbook assignment is to read Introduction To Step Four pages 43 - 45
Four (pages 42 - 54) Average reading time 25 minutes. Underline those things
3. List the most important ideas you realized as a result of today’s reading; pages
42 – 54 in Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. How do these ideas directly
relate to the area you are currently working this Forty Day Commitment? Give
examples.
Today’s Mission Statement: Today we begin by far the most demanding part of this
40-day Commitment. There will be a limited amount of reading but what there is, is
important. Keep in mind we are looking for patterns, habits of thoughts and feelings,
in other words, our personal “reality”. Change a habit and we change the rest of
our life. While an individual event and experience, which seems to be separate or a
one-time experience may be interesting , the patterns or habits they represent are far
more valuable. Keep a separate page to list these habits of thoughts and feelings as
you work through this process.
42
Introduction To Step Four

AN OVERVIEW - Each action you will be asked to take is part of a process to help you realize
consciously, your personal “reality” through which most of your life experiences are filtered. This
part of the process, Step Four, is but one part but a very important one. If we do not awaken to our
little personal “reality” and take responsibility for our beliefs, habits of thoughts and feelings, we
will most likely continue to experience our life on automatic.
INDIVIDUALS AND “REALITY” - It is important to identify the individuals which we shared
our life with in both loving and harmful ways. “Selfishness-self-centeredness! That, we think, is
the root of our troubles. Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-
pity, we step on the toes of our fellows and they retaliate.” (P62 Alcoholic Anonymous – reprinted
with permission). Of course we have a lot to do to heal our past relationships. However, it is even
more vital to have our habits of thoughts and feeling, our rules/patterns, in other words our personal
“reality” healed, changed or transformed. When this is done, it is not only for the past but more
importantly for the present and the future.
PLAN OF ACTION - Action is the magic word, but you may say; “You are asking us to do a lot of
work and it does not seem like magic.” If you do as good a job as you can, we can assure you a
great deal of freedom and wisdom will come into your experience. Just follow the Format For A
Step Inventory (p 46).
PERSONAL “REALITY” - The way we are using the word “pattern” is often called by many
other names: Habits of thoughts and feelings – Inner Rules – Our personal “reality” - Our personal
filter system - etc. Whatever one chooses to call these patterns it is important to know that these
patterns determine most of our life experiences by the way we react to them. These patterns are
always present; however we are not always conscious of them.
WHAT ABOUT RULES AND PATTERNS WORKSHEET - The purpose of this simple
exercise (Rules/Patterns Worksheet) is to help you identify more of your patterns or the inner rules
you live by, conscious or not. Once you do you have the right to choose once again to continue to
use these habits or build new ones. Very often our conscious mind says yes to something we really
want but something does or does not happen which keeps us from that wanted person, place or
thing. It is very likely that we have some long forgotten rule/pattern we made up or went along
with that is saying no to us. These rules/patterns will continue to run on automatic until we call
them into question. One helpful thing you may try to overcome this is: When you say; “I really
want this or to stop that” and you do not get this or stop that, it means that you have a contrary
belief, rule/pattern that’s winning. The next time your conscious mind tells you one thing and you
are experiencing another, try saying this; “ I must have a contrary rule/pattern telling me no, so let
me see it.” When it comes to our consciousness you may choose to make a new decision about that
rule/pattern and then turn it over to your Higher Power and affirm what you do want.
WE’VE GOT QUESTIONS - This workbook is filled with questions. The purpose of these
questions is to get our personal “reality” to surface. This personal “reality” is made up of our habits
of thoughts and feelings. There cannot be any long-term changes of conditions and causes without
going to their source. In doing an inventory we want as complete and useful a list, report, record,
evaluation, survey of our abilities, assets, and resources that make up our personal “reality” as we
can come up with. If we want something other than another quick “fix”, we must go to the root of
the problem - our consciousness at the habit level.
43
This is the home of our personal “reality.” Since it is so important that we understand these basic
principles, we will repeat them from time to time. Since our true healing will come by grace, we
want to position ourselves in the very best place to receive it.
A NEW WAY OF LIFE - We are working to build a new way of living by which we may live life
to its fullest. To do this, we must let go of our old, useless, harmful and limiting belief systems that
are getting in the way of our realizing a Higher Power, a Higher Power that can and will do for us
what we cannot do for ourselves. Finding the right questions and responding to them as honestly as
we can, with as much courage as we can muster at the moment, will help us awaken to a Power
Greater than ourselves. The problem is this; if our personal “reality” is not changed, then nothing
has really changed. We sooner or later fall back in the some old “rut”
WHAT’ A DEFECT? - Our defects, our shortcomings are no more nor less than our habits of
thoughts and feelings, our belief systems, our rules/patterns, in other words our personal “reality”
which no longer works or which is harmful or too limiting.
A DRY HORSE THIEF - Why go to so much trouble? There are people who have been around
the program for years and have never done much of an inventory, if any. They have never taken the
time to get to the conditions and causes. They may be “dry” but their habits of thoughts and
feelings, their personal “reality” has not changed. It is very unlikely that these people will be
joyous, happy and free. If nothing has changed, then nothing has changed. There is an old saying,
“If you sober up a drunken horse thief, you’ve got a sober horse thief.”
FACT-FINDING FACT-FACING PROCESS - “Though our decision [Step Three] was a vital
and crucial step, it could have little permanent effect unless at once followed by a strenuous effort
to face, and to be rid of, the things in ourselves which had been blocking us. Our liquor was but a
symptom. So we had to get down to causes and conditions… A business, which takes no regular
inventory, usually goes broke. Taking a commercial inventory is a fact-finding and a fact-facing
process. It is an effort to discover the truth about the stock-in-trade. One object is to disclose
damaged or un-salable goods, to get rid of them promptly and without regret. If the owner of the
business is to be successful, he cannot fool himself about values.” Nor can we. (Page 64 Alcoholics
Anonymous)
EARNING OR GRACE - Some of us have an old belief that if we really work at this program we
will earn a place in a “secret order.” We were grossly misled. We cannot earn the Three Spiritual
Gifts; these were given to us when each of us was created. However, we do have a part, and that is
to be as open and receptive as we can be for this grace. This would include uncovering, owning,
and having a willingness to let go of everything that is not part of these Three Spiritual Gifts. Our
personal “reality” runs on automatic, twenty-four hours a day, so we need to be committed to this
process - otherwise we will continue to be a victim of our own habits of thoughts and feelings.
WHAT ARE THESE PRINCIPLES? The idea that the principles are embodied in the simple
words that somehow got assigned to each Step over the years is another case of over-simplifying. I
believe that they do have a lot of meaning; in fact they are included in this workbook at the heading
of each Step. As we begin to work Each Step, we begin to understand the principles, which are
embodied in the process. That is, each one of the Steps is part of the whole and is not intended to
be a stand-alone. It is clear that alone none of the Steps would be as effective.
44
REALITY - We do not change or adjust Reality, but we can be part of the solution, which removes
obstructions and unwanted conditions from our little limited personal “reality”. What we can do is
co-create an environment where the natural healing can take place, where our personal “reality”
becomes a little more Real.
1. Workbook assignment is to read Introduction To Step Four pages 43 - 45

Four (pages 42 - 54) Average reading time 25 minutes. Underline those things that
3. List the most important ideas you realized as a result of today’s reading; pages 42
– 54 in Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. How do these ideas directly relate to
45
DAY 11 - Today is _____ _____ ______

Thank You.”
1. Workbook assignment: Study pages 47 – 49. This will help you understand
this format and how it works. Do a dry run on each of the suggested actions.
This will be time well spent and will enrich your experience in working this
40-Day Commitment. Underline those things that were most useful for you
and/or caused you to have questions. Write them down.
2. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous is pages 63 - 71
Average reading time 15 minutes
3. List the most important ideas you can relate to, identify with as a result of
today’s reading; pages 63 – 71 Alcoholics Anonymous. How do these ideas
directly relate to the area you are currently working this Forty Day
4. These “Assets”, “My Part” and “Affects My” List (pages 50 - 51) are to be
used like a Drop Box on a computer. Take these out of your Workbook and
have them on hand when you will be asked to fill in the columns that refer to
these. With these lists you will not have to turn back and forth through this
Workbook to find the supporting List Boxes for other assignments.
5. This Step Eight Worksheet will enable you to note those who you have
harmed as you work through your inventory, therefore having much of your
Step Eight list done without going back over your work. Take this worksheet
out of your Workbook and have it on hand when you come across one who
needs to be on you Step Eight List page 52.
Today’s Mission Statement: As some of us have found, reading, even studying the
directions in advance can save time and frustration. This format is designed
specifically to carry out the mandate; “With all the earnestness at our command, we
beg of you to be fearless and thorough from the very start.” (P58 Alcoholics
Anonymous). It is also designed to help us uncover and discover our personal
“reality”, patterns, habits of thoughts and feelings that keep showing up, limiting
and/or harming us.
46
Step Four (Courage) Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
1. Workbook assignment: Study pages 47 – 49 This will help you understand this format and how it
works. Do a dry run on each of the suggested actions. This will be time well spent and will enrich
your experience in working this 40-Day Commitment. Underline those things that were most useful
for you and/or caused you to have questions. Write them down.
A BEFORE THOUGHT - We believe that it is very important that we work the Steps in order; each
Step opens the door to the next. It is very common when we start having problems in a different
area to go directly to Step Four. If you have not completed the first three Steps we suggest that you
do before you begin your Step Four. Please read all the suggested information before you start your
inventory. It is a lot of information, but it could save you a lot of time later.
COMMITMENT - We strongly suggest that you make a commitment to work on your Steps for at
least one hour each day until you have completed this process.
STAY FOCUSED -Try to keep your responses focused on the area or relationship you are
currently working on. If possible, keep your responses short, simple and to the point.
FORMAT - Step Four Inventory Format – Our goal is to be “. . . fearless and thorough from the
very start.” It may be used as a stand-alone or in concert with one or more of the other inventories
included in THE BOOK OF INVENTORIES, a companion to this workbook. Just follow the Basic
Step Four Inventory Format. This Format may be used as a general inventory that is used to cover
your life in general instead of focusing on one area of your life or you may choose to focus on one
area.
USING THE LIST BOXES - The following is an outline for using the eight List Boxes; this is the
first step in our Step Four Inventory Format. Familiarize yourself with all of the enclosed Step Four
information before you start your responses. For additional space each of the List Boxes have a
Supplement List for your responses on the following page of those List Boxes.
ACTION (1) - Start with the Assets List Boxes p54

a. Choose the items you have either complied with or violated.
b. Note your frequency choices by marking one of the columns: (R) Rarely – (S) Sometimes –
(O) Often – (I) Intense or very Important.
c. If your Intense or most Important Assets are not included in the List Boxes add them to the list.
ACTION (2) - At the bottom of the Assets List Boxes p – Assets Supplement List p55
a. In the left-hand column write the (I) Intense or very Important ASSET.
b. In the right-column write HOW IT WAS EXPRESSED AND/OR VIOLATED.
c. For additional space use the Supplement List or the facing page.
47
ACTION (3) - Next do the Resentment List Boxes p57 Follow the same format as you did for the
top of the Assets List Boxes. In the lower half write out at least three of your worst resentments.
Then do the rest of your resentments using the same format. (If you need additional space use
the Resentment Supplement List p58 or use the facing page or a separate sheet.)
a. In column one write the name of person, place or thing.
b. In column two write the cause: what was or was not done - taken away or not given.
c. In column three write which of your important assets were violated.
d. In column four write what your part was. (See p64 My Part)
e. In column five write what was affected. (See p64 Affects My)
ACTION (4) - In principle you are to follow the same procedure for each of the List Boxes.
a. Note your frequency choices by marking one of the columns: (R) Rarely – (S) Sometimes –
b. Take the suggested action at the bottom of each of the List Boxes.
WHAT ABOUT RULES AND PATTERNS - What Rules/Patterns Do You Live By? – This little
exercise will help uncover the rules/patterns, which control most of our life experiences, from your
childhood to your current rules/patterns. For thought starters draw from all the List Boxes those
items that you marked (I) Intense/very Important. Ask yourself questions about the three basic
instincts; social, security and sex as they relate to different types of relationships like: family,
friends, lovers, money, property, prestige, power, school, work, authorities, in other words anything
that will encourage your rules/patterns to come to your consciousness.
ACTION (5) - GROWING UP RULES - Using the form RULES/PATTERNS WORKSHEET
p73 - In (2) column two write the rule you grew up with for each of your most (I) Intense/very
Important areas. If this rule is useless, harmful, or too limiting and you no longer want it
controlling your life experiences mark an (X) in (1) column one.
ACTION (6) - CURRENT RULES - Using the form RULES/PATTERNS WORKSHEET p73 –
In (4) column four write the rule you currently have for each of your most (I) Intense/very
Important areas. If this rule is useless, harmful, or too limiting and you no longer want it mark an
(X) in (3) column three.
ACTION (7) - DESIRED RULES - Using the form RULES/PATTERNS WORKSHEET p73 - If
you think it’s time to change one of these rules, write desired replacement rule in (5) column five.
ACTION (8) - RULES/PATTERNS LIST BOXES p75 a few common rules and patterns.
a. Follow much the same format as the other List Boxes.
b. Assign each one of your really (I) Intense/very Important with a “make fun of” name. We
will learn how to use these “make fun of” names to discredit our unwanted habits and
unwelcome guests, taking away some of the power we have given them and turning them
over to our Higher Power to be changed, healed or transformed.
USING THE STEP EIGHT WORKSHEET – Page 52
This form is to help generate information for your Step Eight while doing Step Four. As you go
about doing your inventory you will most likely remember those you will need to make amends to
and perhaps forgive. This is a big time saver, as it will cut down on your review time. As we ask
ourselves questions about our experiences and beliefs we begin to get some new insight how we
have harmed others and ourselves, as well as those whom we cannot or will not forgive.
48
This worksheet is for noting those people, places and things as you go about doing your inventory,
your own name should head up both of these lists. By using this Step Eight Worksheet p52 you will
have come a long way toward making your Eighth Step list. Whenever we harm someone or
ourselves, there has been a violation of one or more of the Three Spiritual Gifts: 1. Presence of our
Higher Power, 2. Love, 3. The Individual created Self.
ACTION (9)
a. In the first column note which of these Three Spiritual Gifts were violated by writing in the
corresponding number(s).
b. In the second column put the name of the person or institution you harmed.
c. In the third column write what you did or did not do to cause the harm.
d. FORGIVENESS – list which of these Three Spiritual Gifts were violated by writing in the
corresponding number(s), in the SG column.
e. In the following column place the name of those you are unable or unwilling to forgive.
LAST MINUTE REVIEW - ACTION (10) - Review the inventory work you have done to this
point. This should help you discover additional questions. Perhaps a few more assets, resentments,
fears, harms, need for forgiveness, love and understanding, etc. If so add these and respond to them.
UPDATE - ACTION (11) - After finishing your Fourth Step and preparing for your Fifth Step by
reviewing your work up to that point, you may have new insights about an item’s frequency,
intensity or very importance. If so come back to the List Boxes and make your changes in rating:
(R) - (S) – (O) and (I) columns, plus any additional items.
3. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous is pages 63 - 71

Average reading time 15 minutes.
reading; pages 63 – 71 Alcoholics Anonymous. How do these ideas directly relate to
the area you are current working this Forty Day Commitment? Give examples.
49
4. These “Assets”, “My Part” and “Affects My” List (pages 50 - 52) are to be used like a Drop Box on a
computer. Take these out of your Workbook and have them on hand when you will be asked to fill in the
columns that refer to these. With these lists you will not have to turn back and forth through this Workbook
to find the supporting List Boxes for other assignments.
Asset: A useful or valuable quality, person, or thing, something that contributes to one’s well being.
Choose by marking the columns: (R) Rarely - (S) Sometimes - (O) Often - (I) Intense/very Important.
R S O I # ASSETS (THREE SPIRITUAL GIFTS)
1 The awakening to the Presence of our Higher Power.
2 The awakening to the Love that we are, that all of us are.
3 Awaken to the individual Self we were created to be, with purpose & meaning.
R S O I # ASSETS R S O I # ASSETS
4 Abundance 34 Independent
5 Acceptance 35 Inner-directed
6 Ambition 36 Intelligent/Wise
7 Beautiful/Handsome 37 Interested/Concerned
8 Career/Work 38 Intuitive
9 Committed/Dedicated 39 Joyful/Happy
10 Communication 40 Kindness
11 Compassion 41 Listener
12 Conviction 42 Love/Caring/Sharing
13 Curiosity 43 Loyalty
14 Courage 44 Marriage
15 Continuing education 45 Openness
16 Creative/Inventive 46 Play/Leisure time
17 Drive 47 Patient
18 Even tempered 48 Perseverance
19 Faith/Devotion/Spiritual 49 Power/Title/Money
20 Family 50 Preparedness
21 Focus 51 Productive
22 Forgiving 52 Resilience
23 Friends 53 Risk taking
24 Generous 54 School/Learning
25 God-consciousness 55 Sex
26 Good companion 56 Supportive
27 Good income 57 Take charge
28 Good parent 58 Teachable
29 Good worker 59 Toughness
30 Health 60 Trust
31 Higher Purpose 61 Understanding
32 Honesty 62 Unselfish
33 Humor 63 Willingness
ACTION (2) Format For A Step Four Inventory – page 47 (use the Asset Supplement List p55)
ASSET HOW WAS IT EXPRESSED AND/OR VIOLATED
(example) I have realized that ever since I came into the Program I have been teachable. At first I
Teachable was willing to do anything to get away from the heat; now I’m hungry for a better way
of life. I know now I must be teachable.
50
4. These “My Part” and “Affects My” List (pages 50 - 52) are to be used like a Drop Box on a
computer. Take these out of your Workbook and have them on hand when you will be asked to fill
in the columns that refer to these. With these list you will not have to turn back and forth through
this Workbook to find the supporting List Boxes for other assignments.
MY PART LIST BOXES

Choose by marking the columns: (R) Rarely - (S) Sometimes - (O) Often - (I) Intense/very Important
R S O I # MY PART R S O I # MY PART R S O I # MY PART
1 Anger 9 Lust 17 Saving face
2 Broken 10 Negativity 18 Self-pity
word
3 Delusion 11 Perfectionism 19 Self-seeking
4 Fear 12 Playing God 20 Selfishness
5 Gluttony 13 Poor decision 21 Sloth
6 Greed 14 Pride 22 Stubborn
7 Guilt 15 Procrastinate 23 Withdraw
8 Insecurity 16 Revenge 24 Withhold
AFFECTS MY LIST BOXES

Our instincts, like all of our Creator’s Gifts, can be used for our fulfillment or our destruction. Choose
R S O I # SOCIAL R S O I # SECURITY R S O I # SEX
INSTINCTS INSTINCTS INSTINCTS
1 Able to relate 12 Ambitions 23 Abnormal

2 Acceptance 13 Emotional 24 Abuse
3 Ambitions 14 Financial 25 Acceptable
4 Belonging 15 Home 26 God given
5 Fame 16 Job 27 Hidden
6 Forgiveness 17 Material 28 Jealousy
7 Love 18 Power 29 Loving
Union
8 Productive 19 Safety 30 Masturbation
9 Relationships 20 Spiritual 31 Needy
10 Respected 21 Trust 32 Normal
11 Self-esteem 22 Worth 33 Relief
34 Safe
35 Unacceptable
36 Withholding
51
5. This Step Eight Worksheet will enable you to note those who you have harmed as you work
through your inventory, thereby having much of your Step Eight list done without going back over
your work. Take this worksheet out of your Workbook and have it on hand when you come across
one who needs to be on your Step Eight List.
Whenever we harm someone or ourselves, there has been a violation of one or more of the Three
Spiritual Gifts: (1.) Presence of our Higher Power (2.) Love (3.) The individual created Self. In
the first column note which of these were violated. In column 2 note the one you harmed and in
column 3 what you did or did not do to cause the harm.
SG HARMED WHAT YOU DID OR DID NOT DO TO CAUSE THE HARM
1. Note in the SG column which of these Three Spiritual Gifts that were violated
2. In the next column place the name of those you are unable or unwilling to forgive at this time.
SG NAME SG NAME SG NAME
52
DAY 12 - Today is _____ _____ ______

ask for the guidance, love and wisdom that I need to work through this process and
Thank You.”
INDEX FOR THIS DAY ACTION – ASSETS
USING THE LIST BOXES – The following is an outline for using the eight List Boxes; this is the
first step in our Step Four Inventory Format. Familiarize yourself with all of the enclosed Step Four
information before you start your response. For additional space each of the List Boxes have a
Supplement List for your response on the following page of those List Boxes.
ACTION (1) – Start with the Assets List Boxes p54
a. Choose the items you have either complied with or violated.
b. Note your frequency choices by marking one of the columns (R) Rarely – (S) Sometimes –
c. If your Intense or most Important Assets are not included in the List Boxes add them to the
list.
ACTION (2) – At the bottom of the Assets List Boxes and the Assets Supplement List
a. In the left-hand column write the (I) Intense or very Important ASSET.
b. In the right-column write HOW IT WAS EXPRESSED AND/OR VIOLATED.
For additional space use the Supplement List on p 55 or the facing page.
Al: I had told my sponsor, Lou-is Pazeniton (Lou is passing it on) that I would do anything if he
would help me and then he brought me this Workbook. I had no idea that it was going to take so
much work or maybe I would have been a little more conservative with my promise to do anything.
Lou-is told me that it would be impossible to over-emphasize the importance of identifying our
assets. He said that the violation of those things I value was the root cause of my resentment and
fears and that the realizing the first three assets on the Asset List Boxes determines much of our
happiness, joy and freedom ; their violation causes much of my lack and limitation. In fact he said
that almost all of my resentments would come about when #2 (love) and/or #3 (some violation of
my individual Self), and for sure when I was not trusting my Higher Power (#1) to be my only true
source.
(example) I really don’t like the way I feel when I do not forgive, so I have turned the
Forgiving (22) whole deal over to our Boss and he has healed me, freed me to love once again.
53
ASSET LIST BOXES
ACTION (1) Format For A Step Four Inventory – page 47
Asset: A useful or valuable quality, person, or thing; something that contributes to one’s well being.
R S O I # ASSETS (THREE SPIRITUAL GIFTS)
1 The awakening to the Presence of our Higher Power.
2 The awakening to the Love that we are, that all of us are.
3 Awaken to the individual Self we were created to be, with purpose, meaning.
R S O I # ASSETS R S O I # ASSETS
4 Abundance 34 Independent
5 Acceptance 35 Inner-directed
6 Ambition 36 Intelligent/Wise
7 Beautiful/Handsome 37 Interested/Concerned
8 Career/Work 38 Intuitive
9 Committed/Dedicated 39 Joyful/Happy
10 Communication 40 Kindness
11 Compassion 41 Listener
12 Conviction 42 Love/Caring/Sharing
13 Curiosity 43 Loyalty
14 Courage 44 Marriage
15 Continuing education 45 Openness
16 Creative/Inventive 46 Play/Leisure time
17 Drive 47 Patient
18 Even tempered 48 Perseverance
19 Faith/Devotion/Spiritual 49 Power/Title/Money
20 Family 50 Preparedness
21 Focus 51 Productive
22 Forgiving 52 Resilience
23 Friends 53 Risk taking
24 Generous 54 School/Learning
25 God-consciousness 55 Sex
26 Good companion 56 Supportive
27 Good income 57 Take charge
28 Good parent 58 Teachable
29 Good worker 59 Toughness
30 Health 60 Trust
31 Higher Purpose 61 Understanding
32 Honesty 62 Unselfish
33 Humor 63 Willingness
ACTION (2) Format For A Step Four Inventory – page 47 (use the Asset Supplement List p55)
54
ASSET SUPPLEMENT LIST

55
DAY 13 - Today is _____ _____ ______

Thank You.”
INDEX FOR THIS DAY ACTION – RESENTMENTS

USING THE LIST BOXES – In principle you are to follow the same procedure for each of the
List Boxes. ACTION (1) (page 47) is the first part of our Step Four Inventory Format. a.) Choose
the items from the List Boxes you have complied with or violated. b.) Note your frequency choices
by marking one of the columns: (R) Rarely – (S) Sometimes – (O) Often – (I) Intense or very
Important. c.) If your Intense or most Important are not included in the List Boxes add them to the
list. Take the next suggested action for each of the List Boxes after you have identified and noted
your frequency choices. Each of the List Boxes are followed by a Supplement sheet for additional
space. To complete the second half of this Resentment assignment, just follow Action (3) next.
ACTION (3) (page 48) - Next do the Resentment List Boxes p57 Follow the same format as you
did for the top of the Assets List Boxes ACTION (1) (page 47). Then write out your worst
resentments using the following suggested format.
b. In column two write the cause, i.e., what was or was not done - take away or not given.
c. In column three write which of your important assets was violated. (P50 Take out Asset
List)
d. In column four write what your part was. (See p51 Take out List for My Part)
e. In column five write what was affected. (See p51 Take out List for Affects My)
Al: I ask my sponsor Lou-is what are resentments? Isn’t resentment just another word for anger?
Lou-is: Resentment comes from a root word, which means to re-feel. If we would or could deal
with anger quickly, that anger would not turn into resentments. So re-feeling a violation of our
assets qualifies it as resentment. All resentments are directly or indirectly caused by a violation of
our assets. In fact the one common characteristic of all resentments is in some way a violation of
our assets. In fact violations of Assets #2 (love) and/or #3 (some violation of my individual Self),
and for sure not trusting #1 my Higher Power are most often the root cause of our resentments.
Resentments, we are told in the Big Book, is our number one offender and my experience confirms
this. Resentments rob me of the joy of living, and reveal most of my defects, my selfishness, self-
centeredness and fear. Resentments drive a lot of alcoholics back to the bottle and if not to the
bottle it could cut us off from the sun light of the Spirit. So don’t cut this part of your inventory
short. Follow the above format.
56
MY RESENTMENT LIST BOXES
R S O I # RESENTMENTS R S O I # RESENTMENTS
1 Abandonment 21 Infidelity
2 Addiction 22 Insensitivity
3 Alcoholism 23 Insults
4 Backbiters 24 Jealousy
5 Being used 25 Judgmental
6 Condemnation 26 Pride
7 Condescending 27 Perfectionism
8 Controlling 28 Projecting my guilt
9 Depredation 29 Manipulation
10 Dishonesty 30 Negativity
11 Disloyalty 31 Rejection
12 Disrespectful 32 Self-centeredness
13 Driven 33 Selfishness
14 Envy 34 Self-righteousness
15 Fear 35 Slights
16 H-A-L-T 36 Toxic thinking
17 Isolation 37 Too much thinking - no action
18 Illusions 38 User
19 Inconsiderate 39 What others are
20 Indifference 40 What others have
ACTION (3) - Next do the Resentment List Boxes p57 Follow the same format as you did for the
top of the Assets List Boxes. Write out your worst resentments using the suggested format. (If you
need additional space use the Resentment Supplement List on p58 or the facing page or a separate
sheet.)
b. In column two write the cause, i.e. what was or was not done - take away or not given.
c. In column three write which of your important assets were violated. (P50 Take out Asset List)
d. In column four write what your part was. (See p51 Take out List for My Part)
e. In column five write what was affected. (See p51 Take out List for Affects My)
We suggest that you use the numbers assigned on the Take out List Boxes in each column – If you
have added to the list you may assign your addition a number
Resentful The Cause Of My Resentment Asset My Affects
At: Violated Part My
(example) His attention to my wife – he told my wife of my 42 – 60 - 1 – 4- 7–9–
Mr Brown mistress – He’s after my job and my wife 8 13 - 18 11 - 28
57
MY RESENTMENT SUPPLEMENT LIST
Resentful The Cause Of My Resentment Asset My Part Affects

At: Violated My
58
DAY 14 - Today is _____ _____ ______

When you start your daily practice you may ask your Higher Power – “Cause me to have all
the honesty, willingness and open-mindedness I may need here and now. I ask, for the guidance,
love and wisdom that I need to work through this process and gain the most I can at this time. I am
as willing as I can be to set aside everything I even think I know about this area, this way of life so
that my chances for an open-mind and to be teachable are better and that I may realize Your Three
Spiritual Gifts: Awakening to You, to be the love I am and to be the individual You created me as.
Thank You.”
INDEX FOR THIS DAY’S ACTION – FORGIVENESS
your frequency choices. Each one of the List Boxes is followed by a Supplement sheet for
additional space.
ACTION – After you have completed the Forgiveness List Boxes using ACTION (1) follow the
same procedure below to complete the second part of this Forgiveness assignment.
a. In column one write the name of person, place or thing you are having a problem forgiving.
b. In column two write the cause, i.e. what was or was not done - take away or not given.
The willingness to forgive is the key to all healing in all types of relationships. The key to an
open mind is the willingness to forgive. The key to self-forgiveness is the willingness to forgive
others. The key to our spiritual growth and awakening is the willingness to forgive. We may not be
able to forgive for one “reason” or another but we can be willing even if our only motive is selfish,
like “I just don’t want to feel this way or I’m tired of being negative and resentful.”
The importance of forgiveness is often dismissed with little or no thought. One possible reason may
be as simple as not knowing how to forgive. Often we are just unable to forgive or let go. More
often it is from the core belief that when someone does something “wrong”, even if that someone is
our self, he must be found guilty and punished. Yet when we are wrong most would love to be
forgiven quickly. Not only that, we don’t want to see our “crime” made into a capital crime. If I
want this kind of forgiveness, I must be willing to extend it to others.
A naive person both forgives and forgets; a stupid person nether forgives or forgets; a wise person
forgives but does not forget. The wise person can use this experience of love to share even more
than ever. Remember this: What I can do is my responsibility; all else is God’s responsibility. So
all I can do at any given time is to be willing; that’s enough. Let our Higher Power do the rest.
Al: I want to forgive everyone even myself, NOW. Lou-is: How about one at a time? As I
understand it, if want the fullness of life – if I want loving, caring relationships with whomever – if
I want to be joyous, happy and free, if I want an open heart, mind, and soul then I must be willing to
forgive all, even myself, perhaps not able but willing. Then I can look to our Father to do the deed.
Lou-is: I recall you telling me, if the doors of my consciousness were clear of clutter caused by my
holding on to old useless or harmful beliefs, judgments of others and myself – realizing my part in
all of this is no more nor less than my little personal “reality.”
59
Our Program demonstrates that we can, through its process, become forgiven forgivers forgiving.
Al: Is there a time when forgiveness is not needed even when some “wrong” was done?
Lou-is: Yes. “We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it.” (Alcoholics Anonymous
– p83) In those areas we have experienced some degree of awakening, healing and/or
transformation we have no need for guilt, punishment, resentment or fear. This area being healed
has become an asset, which we may share with others. We have let go of our harmful judgments of
others and ourselves to some degree. Without these judgments we have no need of forgiveness.
This is the very best kind of forgiveness – none needed.
Lou-is: Here are brief excerpts from: To Give Is To Receive by Gerald.G.Jampolsky “The
emphasis underlying this course is that inner peace can be reached only when we practice
forgiveness. Forgiveness is the letting go of the past, and is therefore the means for correcting our
misperceptions. Our misperceptions can only be undone now, and this is possible only through the
process of letting go whatever we think other people may have done to us, or whatever we may
think we did to them. Through true forgiveness we can stop the endless recycling of guilt, and look
upon ourselves and others with love. Forgiveness permits us to let go all thoughts that seem to
separate us from each other. Without the belief in separation, we can accept our own healing and
extend healing love to all those around us. Healing then, becomes the thought of unity. Whenever I
see someone else as guilty, I am reinforcing my own sense of guilt and unworthiness. I cannot
forgive myself unless I am willing to forgive others. Only through forgiveness can my release from
guilt and fear be complete.”
Brief excerpts form: The Sermon On The Mount By Emmet Fox – “The technique of forgiveness is
simple. The only thing that is essential is willingness to forgive. Provided you desire to forgive the
offender, the greater part of the work is already done. People have always made such a bogey of
forgiveness because they have been under to erroneous impression that to forgive a person means
that you have to compel yourself to like him. Happily this is by no means the case – we are not
called upon to like anyone whom we do not find ourselves liking spontaneously, and, indeed, it is
quite impossible to like people to order. You can no more like to order than you can hold the winds
in your fist, and if you endeavor to coerce yourself into doing so, you will finish by disliking or
hating the offender more than ever. We are not obliged to like anyone; but we are under a binding
obligation to love everyone, love, meaning a vivid sense of impersonal good will. This has nothing
directly to do with the feelings; though it is always followed, sooner or later, by a wonderful feeling
of peace and happiness.”
THE METHOD - The method of forgiving is this: Get by yourself and become quiet. Repeat any
prayer or treatment that appeals to you. Then quietly say. “I fully and freely forgive X (mentioning
the name of the offender); I loose him and let him go. I completely forgive the whole business in
question. As far as I am concerned, it is finished forever. I cast the burden of resentment upon the
[Higher Power] within me. He is free now, and I am free too. I wish him well in every phase of his
life. That incident is finished. The Truth has set us both free. I thank God.” Then get up and go
about your business. Afterward, whenever the memory of the offender or the offense happens to
come into your mind, bless the delinquent briefly and dismiss the thought. Do this, however many
times the thought may come back.
60
After a few days it will return less and less often, until you forget it altogether. Then, perhaps after
an interval, shorter or longer, the old trouble may come back to memory once more, but you will
find that now all bitterness and resentment have disappeared, and you are both free with the perfect
freedom. Your forgiveness is complete. You will experience a wonderful joy in the realization of
the demonstration.
your frequency choices. The List Boxes are followed by a Supplement sheet for additional space.
R S O I # WHY I AM WILLING R S O I # WHY I AM
UNWILLING OR UNABLE
1 I have a lot more to gain 14 Alone is better than hurt
2 I want he problem 15 Fear, taken advantage of
corrected
3 I want this relationship 16 I don’t know how to forgive
4 I want to be forgiven 17 I can’t let go
5 I want to be free 18 I seek revenge
6 I want to build a trust 19 I stuffed it
7 I want to experience peace 20 I suffered and they went free
8 Willing to let God do for 21 I want to punish them
me
9 I’ll forgive/I won’t forget 22 I’m no fool
10 I’m tired of being fearful 23 I’m scared to
11 I’m tired of being negative 24 Withholding/Withdrawing
12 I’m tired of being resentful 25 Shows that I approve of ( )
13 It is the loving thing to do 26 Some like to hurt others
27 They didn’t forgive me
28 They don’t deserve it
29 They really did hurt me
30 They will do “it” again
31 They will go unpunished
ACTION – After you have completed the Forgiveness List Boxes using ACTION (1) follow the
same procedure below to complete the second part of this Forgiveness assignment.
a. In column one write the name of person, place or thing you are having a problem forgiving.
b. In column two write the cause: what was or was not done - take away or not given.
WHO OR WHAT WHAT’S GOING ON WITH THIS FORGIVENESS
61
WHO OR WHAT WHAT’S GOING ON WITH THIS FORGIVENESS
We may read a thousand menus and cook books and starve to death but if we have just one bite
our nourishment begins. If we have only one moment of experiencing forgiveness our healing
has begun.
Lou-is: Here is a way we can experience a true forgiveness in this present moment. This is the only
Real Time we have. Yes, we can experience an instant forgiveness, even here and now, one
moment at a time. If you do not get anything else out of this workshop but this simple process of
Instant Forgiveness, if you are anything like me, then count this workshop a great success.
1. Pick out one of your worse resentments, one you have held on to far too long.
2. Just be sure you are willing to let it go – not able but willing.
3. Find a motive with in your self no matter how selfish it may be, one that your head and your
heart can agree on. For example; Al was so tired of being negative, fearful and angry at Sam
M. that he no longer cared who did what, to whom. He just wanted to be free, so he no longer
felt, thought, and acted as he did when he thought or heard Sam’s name. Al’s sponsor, Lou-is
Pazeniton had told him, “God answers the prayers of the heart because He put them there.”
4. When you truly realize that you want even a few minutes of freedom – say something like this:
God I am so tired of thinking and feeling this way – I am so willing just for this moment to
forgive myself and (name of the person, place or thing) for any wrongs, real or illusion that I
did or did not do or they did or did not do.
5. God I am willing but not able at this time to forgive – so I entrust this to you.
6. Thank you,
7. Now let it go – one moment at a time – this one. Repeat this any time a thought of this one
comes back. Bless both of you and turn it back to your Higher Power.
8. We have the power to choose in this moment – this present one. It is the only one there is.
9. Leave the results to your Higher Power. He will do for us what we cannot do alone and unaided.
62
DAY 15 - Today is _____ _____ ______
Thank You.”
INDEX FOR THIS DAY’S ACTION

MY PART AND AFFECTS MY LIST BOXES
list. Take the next suggested action for each List Boxes after you have identified and noted your
frequency choices. Each of the List Boxes pages is followed by a Supplement sheet for
additional space.
ACTION – After you have completed the My Part List Boxes using ACTION (1) follow the same
procedure below to complete the next part of this assignment.
a. In column one write what your part was.
b. In column two write what you did or did not do as your part. (Start with the ones you marked
Intense or very Important.
ACTION – After you have completed the Affects My List Boxes using ACTION (1) follow the
same procedure below to complete the next part of this assignment.
c. In column one write which of your instincts was affected.
d. In column two write how this instinct came into play. (Start with the ones you marked
Intense or very Important.)
Al: My sponsor, Lou-is made this My Part thing very simple when he said, “It is a spiritual axiom
that every time we are disturbed, no matter what the cause, there is something wrong with us.” (12
and 12 Alcoholics Anonymous reprinted with permission) My Part comes directly from my
personal “reality”, (rules, patterns, habits of thoughts and feelings, belief systems). This is the
reason we have made such a big deal out of our inventories. Our real change must come by
changing our consciousness, that is, the personal “reality” we made up or went along with. Once
we accept that our experience is being filtered through our personal “reality” we can then choose
to have it changed. Then our Higher Power through this Program can and will, if asked, transform
our defects into assets.
63
Choose by marking the columns: (R) Rarely - (S) Sometimes - (O) Often - (I) Intense/very Important
R S O I # MY PART R S O I # MY PART R S O I # MY PART
1 Anger 9 Lust 17 Saving face

2 Broken word 10 Negativity 18 Self-pity
3 Delusion 11 Perfectionism 19 Self-seeking
4 Fear 12 Playing God 20 Selfishness
5 Gluttony 13 Poor decision 21 Sloth
6 Greed 14 Pride 22 Stubborn
7 Guilt 15 Procrastinate 23 Withdraw
8 Insecurity 16 Revenge 24 Withhold
MY PART WHAT I DID OR DID NOT DO AS MY PART. (INTENSE OR VERY IMPORTANT)

(Example) I would not tell anyone what I was so angry about – I would just withdraw hoping
Withdraw the problem would go away; it never did.
AFFECTS MY LIST BOXES

Our instincts as all of our Creator’s Gifts can be used for our fulfillment or our destruction, our choice.
R S O I # SOCIAL R S O I # SECURITY R S O I # SEX
INSTINCTS INSTINCTS INSTINCTS
1 Able to relate 12 Ambitions 23 Abnormal
2 Acceptance 13 Emotional 24 Abuse
3 Ambitions 14 Financial 25 Acceptable
4 Belonging 15 Home 26 God given
5 Fame 16 Job 27 Hidden
6 Forgiveness 17 Material 28 Jealousy
7 Love 18 Power 29 Loving Union
8 Productive 19 Safety 30 Masturbation
9 Relationships 20 Spiritual 31 Needy
10 Respected 21 Trust 32 Normal
11 Self-esteem 22 Worth 33 Relief
34 Safe
35 Unacceptable
36 Withholding
For additional space use the Supplement List on the next page
WHICH INSTINCT HOW DID THIS INSTINCT COME INTO PLAY (INTENSE OR VERY IMPORTANT)
(Example) I just can’t seem to get along with other people – I have been trying to develop
Relationships better social skills – The fellowship has sure helped but I have a long way to go
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MY PART SUPPLEMENT LIST
a. In column one write what your part was.
b. In column two write what you did or did not do as your part. (Intense/very Important.)
MY PART WHAT I DID OR DID NOT DO AS MY PART. (INTENSE OR VERY IMPORTANT)
AFFECTS MY SUPPLEMENT LIST

c. In column one write which of your instincts was effected.
d. In column two write how this instinct came into play, (Intense/very Important.)
WHICH INSTINCT HOW DID THIS INSTINCT COME INTO PLAY (INTENSE OR VERY IMPORTANT)
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DAY 16 - Today is _____ _____ ______
mind and to be teachable are better and I may realize Your Three Spiritual Gifts:
Thank You.”
INDEX FOR THIS DAY ACTION - FEAR LIST BOXES
your frequency choices. Each of the List Boxes are followed by a Supplement sheet for
additional space.
ACTION – After you have completed the My Fear List Boxes using ACTION (1) follow the same
procedure below to complete the next part of this assignments.
1. In column one list write the name of the person, place or thing you fear the most, that most
intense fear.
2. In column two write the cause: what was or was not done – taken away or not given.
3. Is this Fear Rational (R) or Irrational (I)? Mark one of the right hand columns.
Lou-is: Fear gains much of its “power” by our trying to avoid looking at it, feeling it, or running
away from it. When we turn and face our fears their nature will change into one of two things:
1. This fear is a real problem that calls for a solution or acceptance. (Rational)
2. This fear is an illusion that we made up. (Irrational)
The way we are most likely to respond is easy to see. When I have a rational fear, or problem I
can choose to look for a solution or just accept it. Much of the emotional insanity is taken out of
it.
When I realize that this fear is irrational, another one of my illusions I made up, that it is not
Reality but my personal “reality”, it is then very likely I can let it go and if I am ready I can start
working on my personal “reality” that called it up to start with.
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MY FEAR LIST BOXES
R S O I # COMMON FEARS R S O I # COMMON FEARS
1 11TH hour of my life 17 I won’t get what I want
2 Abandonment 18 I’ll be paid back
3 Accidents 19 Incapable to love/be loved
4 Any form of lack 20 Loss of a loved one
5 Authorities - God 21 Loss of a relationship
6 Being alone 22 Never enough
7 Being taken advantage of 23 No loving God-conscious
8 Can’t have children 24 No one to share with
9 Can’t meet financial needs 25 Not liked or loved
10 Certain types of people 26 Poor health
11 Change 27 Projecting my anger
12 Disapproval 28 Rejection
13 Failure 29 Success
14 Fear of being a fool 30 Stuck, can’t really change
15 Fearful of having children 31 Unable to realize purpose
16 Have no real value 32 Weird imagination
1. In column one write the name of the person, place or thing you fear the most, that most
intense fear.
3. Is this Fear Rational (R) or Irrational (I) ? Mark one of the right hand Columns.
FEARUL OF: THE CAUSE OF THIS FEAR R I
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MY FEAR SUPPLEMENT LIST
1. In column one write the name of the person, place or thing you fear the most, that most
intense fear.
3. Is this Fear Rational (R) or Irrational (I)? Mark one of the right hand Columns.
FEARUL OF: THE CAUSE OF THIS FEAR R I
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DAY 17 - Today is _____ _____ ______
Thank You.”
MY HARM LIST BOXES
list. Take the next suggested action for each List Boxes after you have identified and noted your
frequency choices. Each of the List Boxes pages is followed by a Supplement sheet for
additional space.
ACTION – After you have completed your Harm List Boxes using ACTION (1) follow the
procedure below to complete the next two parts of this assignment.
ACTION: Review your Assets p54, Resentments p57, Forgiveness p61, Step Eight Worksheet p52
1. In column one write the name of the person, place or thing you harmed the most.
3. In column three write My Part and column four Affects My (see these List Boxes p51)
Al: What about the people who harmed me?
Lou-is: Is there anyone who harmed you that you did not include on your resentment list and your
forgiveness list? If so go back and include them on those two lists.
Al: When you first started working the Program with me you let me get by with a lot of stuff and
now you call me on everything. I just wanted you to know that I have been harmed also.
Lou-is: Welcome to planet earth. Let’s focus on your inventory and no one else’s. The fact is we
are all one life, which means we cannot harm another without harming ourselves. As the results of
my doing a thorough job on my inventory and owning what I uncovered and discovered I have been
able to choose to stop harming others and myself the best I can. Sometimes that is real good and
sometimes not, but I can tell you my life has improved to the extent that I have been able to extend
love instead of all the negative stuff that was a habit. I have been given that opportunity to choose
once again not to let the past equal my future.
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HOW I HARMED OTHERS LIST BOXES
R S O I # WHAT I DID OR R S O I # WHAT I DID OR
DID NOT DO DID NOT DO
1 Withholding 15 Lied
2 Withdrawing 16 Manipulated
3 Betrayed my loved one 17 Put another down
4 Blamed 18 Shut down
5 Changed addictions 19 Snooped
6 Criticized 20 Talked one way, acted
another
7 Distrusted 21 Took what was not mine
8 Empty promises 22 Was a no show
9 Enabled someone 23 Was controlling
10 Gossiped 24 Was dishonest
11 Got “even” 25 Was jealous
12 I’m a user 26 Would not forgive
13 Irresponsible 27 Was in denial
14 Lack of communication
HOW I HARMED MYSELF LIST BOXES
S O I # WHAT I DID OR R S O I # WHAT I DID OR

DID NOT DO DID NOT DO
1 I bankrupted myself 11 I hurt myself spiritually
financially
2 I compromised myself 12 I lied to myself
3 I could not trust myself 13 I made myself ill
4 I cut myself off from love 14 I punished myself
5 I denied God’s Presence 15 I withheld/withdrew
6 I denied my individual 16 I would not ask for help
purpose
7 I hurt myself emotionally 17 I would not forgive myself
8 I hurt myself mentally 18 I lost respect for others/
myself
9 I hurt myself physically 19 I was in denial
10 I hurt myself socially
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ACTION: Review your Assets p54 – Resentments p57 – Forgiveness p61 – Step Eight Worksheet
p52
1. In column one write the name of the person, place or thing you harmed the most.
3. In column three write My Part and column four Affects My (see these List Boxes p51)
HOW I HARMED OTHERS LIST BOXES
I HARMED WHAT I DID OR DID NOT DO TO CAUSE THE HARM My Part Affects My
HOW I HARMED MYSELF LIST BOXES

I HARMED WHAT I DID OR DID NOT DO TO CAUSE THE HARM My Part Affects My
MYSELF
MYSELF
MYSELF
MYSELF
MYSELF
MYSELF
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DAY 18 - Today is _____ _____ ______

Thank You.”
RULES AND PATTERNS WORKSHEETS
WHAT ABOUT RULES AND PATTERNS - What Rules/Patterns Do You Live

By? – This little exercise will help uncover the rules/patterns, which control most of
our life experiences, from your childhood to your current rules/patterns. For thought
starters draw from all the List Boxes those items that you marked (I) Intense/very
Important. Ask yourself questions about the three basic instincts; social, security and
sex as they relate to different types of relationships like: family, friends, lovers,
money, property, prestige, power, school, work, authorities, etc. In other words, try
anything that will encourage our rules/patterns to come to our consciousness.
GROWING UP ACTION (5) Format For A Step Four Inventory – page 48
Using the form RULES/PATTERNS WORKSHEET - In column two (2) write the rule you grew up
with for each of your most (I) Intense/very Important areas. If this rule is useless, harmful, or too
limiting, and you no longer want it controlling your life experiences, mark an (X) in column one
(1).
CURRENT ACTION (6) Format For A Step Four Inventory – page 48 Using the form
RULES/PATTERNS WORKSHEET – In column four (4) write the rule you currently have for each
of your most (I) Intense/very Important areas. If this rule is useless, harmful, or too limiting and
you no longer want it mark an (X) in column three (3).
DESIRED RULE ACTION (7) Format For A Step Four Inventory – page 20 Using the form
RULES/PATTERNS WORKSHEET - If you think it’s time to change one of these rules, write your
desired replacement rule in column five (5). For additional space use the Supplement List on p 74
or the facing page or a separate sheet of paper.
Lou-is: Al, this is a chance for you to see that some of your old habits of thoughts and feelings
began a very long time ago. Perhaps some of these beliefs you picked up as you were growing up
have not changed all that much. I have had some of mine so long I forgot when and where I began
to respond the way I do.
Al: Maybe I can blame my mom and dad for all my stuff. Just joking.
72
Here is an example:
(1) (2) My Growing up rule: My (3) My Current rule for: My
(4) (5) My
Desired rule for: My
Career Career Career
X We have to earn what we get. X Work smarter not harder. Do the best you can and leave
Money doesn’t grow on trees. the rest to God.
My Growing up rule for: My Current rule for: My Desired rule for:
73
74
DAY 19 - Today is _____ _____ ______

Thank You.”
RULES/PATTERNS LIST BOXES
USING THESE LIST BOXES – In principle you are to follow the same procedure for each of the
list.
After you identify your patterns by marking the columns you choose, go back over them and give a
“make fun of” name. This name will be useful in the discrediting and dis-empowering of your old
habits of thoughts and feelings. Out with the old rules/patterns and on with building the new ones.
This process will be used in some of the remaining Steps, primarily in Step Six and Step Ten.
Al: I’m not very good at making up funny names about my worse defects.
Lou-is: What are some of the funniest characters to you on TV or the movies? Name some of these
and use that creative mind of yours to come up with a few that make a chuckle come to mind.
Lou-is: The sooner we can laugh at ourselves the sooner our healing will step up to a new level. We
want these “Make fun of” names to be like an unwanted guest who comes to our door; we can
choose to invite that person in and dwell on a “who done me wrong” song or we can turn that
person away as soon as we see who it is. A “Make fun of” name will dis-empower that person to a
large degree where they are less likely to harm us, upset us or cause us to experience that fear we
get when someone or something intimidates us. When we lose respect for that person to the point
we can laugh when we think of them, we have come a long way in being free from their control
over us. In one way or another we gave that “power” to them. It’s time to take it back and give it to
our real Boss.
Let me give you an example:
“Make fun R S O I # These rules/patterns are being violated or complied with. Violated
of” name and complied with are just two sides to the same rule/pattern.
Jeal - o- 29 I have a lot of problems with jealousy. (I had this problem so long it
saurus seems like it started with the dinosaurs – but when I think of it as a
jealous dinosaur I can lighten up.)
75
Peppy le 8 I practice the “law” of lack, never enough of anything (love, money,
Few time, etc.).(Same as above)
Al: Ok, let me try one.

Peter 19 I judge by such high standards that all must fail. I am driven by
Perfector perfectionism. (No matter what I do it is never good enough – I
with a P on started feeling this way it seems like my first day in school – A
my chest family motivator - Beatings will continue until grades improve)
Lou-is: You’ve got the main point. Now finish the task. It would be useful for you to come up with
some of your own important patterns.
The first three, the Three Spiritual Gifts are primary patterns and they are not subject to any real
change. We came equipped with these three Spiritual Gifts even though we are not fully awakened
to them.
1 Awakening to the Presence of our Higher Power.
2 Awakening to the Love that we are.
3 Awakening to the individual we were created, with purpose,
meaning.
The following rules/patterns are common to most of us. These patterns are suggestions only. If
you cannot find a pattern in the following that serve your needs, make up your own list.
4 I know I am of more worth or value than I can prove.
5 I look to other people, places and things to determine my: worth,
meaning, purpose, happiness, sadness, fulfillment, etc.
6 I compromise myself to get what I need or want, then resent it.
7 I have been in denial.
8 I practice the “law” of lack, never enough of anything (love, money,
time, etc.).
9 I am quick to forgive. I seek correction. I realize that guilt and
punishment are an illusion, like a drug, a quick fix.
10 All must be controlled with guilt and punishment, even myself.
11 I project my experience and beliefs, and call it reality.
12 I know I am far more loving than I am able to give or receive.
13 The beginning of a relationship (love, friends, business, etc.) is like
this: I believe you believe in me, that I am special. The beginning of
the end of this relationship is when I no longer believe you believe
in me.
14 I resist change. I am likely to procrastinate.
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15 I blame the past, project negatively on the future, fear the present.
16 I experience fear in most areas of my life including success and
love.
17 I have to earn everything or know the “right” people or get lucky.
18 I have hurt others, but the harm was done without malice.
19 I judge by such high standards that all must fail. I am driven by
perfectionism.
20 I change roles within the same pattern, thinking I have changed: i.e.,
one time a victim, the next time the aggressor; or I am a user, and
the next time I am being used.
21 I make “deals” and promises, but I don’t keep them.
22 What I can have I don’t want, and what I want I can’t have.
23 I lack ability to form a true relationship with another human being.
24 I feel I don’t belong. I feel emptiness no one or no thing can fill.
25 I keep attracting the same kind of sick relationships (love, business,
friends, etc.)
26 I just cannot find the willingness to do whatever “it” takes.
27 I am doing just great; then I fall into an old rut. This is a rebound.
28 I am too negative, fearful and angry so I withhold and withdraw.
29 I have a lot of problems with jealousy.
30
31
32
33
34
35
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DAY 20 - Today is _____ _____ ______
Thank You.”
STEP FIVE - (INTEGRITY)

ADMITTED TO GOD, TO OURSELVES AND TO ANOTHER HUMAN BEING
THE EXACT NATURE OF OUR WRONGS.
1. Workbook assignment pages 78 through 80 – Underline those things that were

most useful for you and/or caused you to have questions. Write them down.
2. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous is pages 72 through
75, reading time 5 minutes
today’s reading. How do these ideas directly relate to the area you are currently
working this Forty Day Commitment? Give examples.
Five - Average reading time 15 minutes
5. List the most important ideas you realized as a result of today’s reading, the
chapter on Step Five in Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. How do these
Al Kohallek had promised himself that he would never tell anyone his secrets; so,
when he got to the Fifth Step he balked. He thought he could find an easier, softer
way. But he could not.
Al: I’ve already talked to my Higher Power about my “secrets” and I see no reason to
tell anyone else. It came to me that if I tell someone everything, that person could
blackmail me into doing his or her will. Shall I move on to Step Six?
78
Lou-is: Admitting to our Higher Power and to ourselves everything is two-thirds of

this Step and I may add the easier part. But it will not get the job done. We are most
likely to go from one extreme of guilt and remorse to the other extreme of
rationalizing our part away. Here are some of the reasons for taking this vital Step:
1. Most of us have always dreamed of having someone to love and accept us just
the way we are. Only by sharing with another human being everything can we
hope to experience this love and acceptance to the max.
2. The Big Book states“ if we skip this vital step, we may not overcome
drinking. And there is very little chance of our being restored to sanity.”
3. Some of us gain that feeling of belonging.
4. We are very likely to experience a God -consciousness or a spiritual
awakening.
5. Our "secrets" take a great deal of energy to support. Letting go of them will
release the energy we are using to hold them back.
6. By the way, I’ve never heard of anyone being blackmailed after doing their
Fifth Step, but I have heard of a lot of people experiencing freedom and a
peace of mind for the first time.
1. Workbook assignment pages 78 through 80 – Underline those things that were

most useful for you and/or caused you to have questions. Write them down.
2. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous is pages 72

through75, reading time 5 minutes
today’s reading. How do these ideas directly relate to the area you are
currently working this Forty Day Commitment? Give examples.
79
Five - Average reading time 15 minutes
chapter on Step Five in Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. How do these
80
DAY 21 - Today is _____ _____ ______

Thank You.”
ADMITTED TO GOD, TO OURSELVES AND TO ANOTHER HUMAN
BEING THE EXACT NATURE OF OUR WRONGS.
PREP WORK FOR SHARING YOUR STEP FIVE
1. Make an outline as you go through this Prep Work so you will be able to
remember everything you need to share.
2. Review all of your responses to the questions and/or statements up to this point.
This includes your written responses, your List Boxes, and the Step Eight
Worksheet.
3. Be ever so mindful of your patterns (experiences that you repeat.) Even if they
were with different people, places, things or forms. These patterns (habits of
thoughts and feelings) are one of, if not the most important parts of this process.
These patterns make up your personal “reality,” and are the key to long-term
recovery, and personal growth.
4. These patterns will play a vital part of Steps Six and Ten
5. As we go through our review, we continue our preliminary work on Step Eight.
As we are preparing we may uncover additional harms done and/or people we are
unable to forgive. Add these to your Step Eight Worksheet
Al: Who’s going to listen to my Fifth Step?
Lou-is: It is very important that you find the right person to confide in. We believe
that it is best if you can share with a person who has finished his or her own Fifth
Step. If this person is living the Program he/she will have a better understanding of
what it is you are trying to do. However, you may not be able to find someone you
could trust in your present group. You may have to go outside of our Program.
Many of us take our first time Fifth Step with a non-Program person. The main thing
is that you feel that you can trust this person.
81
This should enable you to be as honest as you can be at the time. We would caution
you about taking this Step with someone too close to you or one with whom you have
an ax to grind. Someone could be hurt if you are really honest. It would be wise to
question your own motives.
Ask this person to help you identify your patterns. Show this person a copy of your
pattern list. They may have additions to your list or ask you to clarify the pattern.
You may find you have a lot in common; on the other hand you may not even come
close. Remember it is your inventory, your patterns, which means, in the end you are
the one who will gain or fail to gain from those patterns directly.
Lou-is suggested that Al make a list of the possible people that he could or would
take this vital step with. Al listed those people that he thought would most benefit
him by taking his Fifth Step with them. In the first column he put their names. In
the second column he wrote what he believed to be any benefits or advantages in
doing it with that person. In the third column he wrote what he thought or felt could
be any possible problems, and he listed his fears.
NAME BENEFITS - ADVANTAGES PROBLEMS - FEARS
Lou-is also suggested that Al set the date, in fact tomorrow, Day 22, a starting time,
and the approximate amount of time to set aside to complete it, with the person he
had chosen. Reminding him to be sure that each would be free to take all the time
needed.
DATE START UP TO PLACE PERSON PHONE #
TIME TIME
Day 22
Ask this person what the format will be used for taking the Fifth Step (what should Al
expect). Write out any questions you may have or any part of the process you may
want that person to clarify before you begin.
82
DAY 22 - Today is _____ _____ ______
Thank You.” This is a great prayer for this “Fifth Step” day.

ADMITTED TO GOD, TO OURSELVES AND TO ANOTHER HUMAN
BEING THE EXACT NATURE OF OUR WRONGS.
INDEX FOR THIS DAY’S ACTION – TAKING YOUR STEP FIVE
Now that all your prep work is done and you set the date, the starting time, and the
approximate amount of time to set aside to complete it with the person you have
chosen, this is a great day to carry out this important mission.
DATE START UP TO PLACE PERSON PHONE #
TIME TIME
Al trusted Lou-is, so he decided to take his Fifth Step with him. Also, Lou-is already
knew a lot about him. Al did what was suggested. He pocketed his pride and went to
it, “illuminating every twist of character, every dark cranny of the past.” Once he had
taken this Step, withholding nothing, he was delighted. He had his first spiritual
experience. He felt for the first time that another human accepted him just as he was.
He felt a new freedom.
Some of those things Al had kept hidden for so many years lost their power over him.
For the moment Al felt like a free man, but Lou-is reminded him there was a lot of
work yet to be done. A few days after Al had taken his Fifth Step, he was working
with a newcomer and found himself sharing one of his secrets in order to help the
newcomer. He told us later what a wonderful thing it was to be able to help another
with sharing his experience of a secret he was sure he would take to the grave.
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DAY 23 - Today is _____ _____ ______

Thank You.”
INDEX FOR THIS DAY’S ACTION – STEP SIX PREP WORK

STEP SIX - (WILLINGNESS)
WERE ENTIRELY READY TO HAVE GOD REMOVE ALL THESE DEFECTS OF
CHARACTER.
1. Workbook assignment - Underline those things that were most useful for you
and follow suggestions A – B – C – D – E on pages 85 – 86.
2. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous is page 76- first
paragraph, reading time 1 minute.
Six - Average reading time 13 minutes
chapter on Step Six in Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. How do these
84
The key to this Step is in the wording. “Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of
character.” First of all, we really want something when we are entirely ready. This really wanting
something is often the beginning of healing. Second, it is God that is to remove all, not us alone
and unaided. Third, the wording tells us which defects are to be removed. At this time, “these”
implies that we have identified specific defects.
Al: The rest of the Steps will be a piece of cake after taking my Fifth Step.
Lou-is: I want to remind you not to take any of the Steps too lightly. Each Step is an important part
of the process. In case you have forgotten, our minds will play tricks on us. For example, with this
Step our conscious mind tells us, “Of course, I want all of these defects removed.” Knowing now
just how harmful, useless, or painful these defects are, I will just let them go. Two problems with
that well intended statement. First, generalizing will not get it done. Second, we are not the ones to
remove these defects, alone and unaided. Just follow the A – B – C – D – E - down below.
(A) Lou-is: Once again, I am reminding you; just because something is simple does not make it
easy. Now that you found some of your patterns, “these defects”, it will be useful for you to follow
the following suggestions: That you take each one of “these defects” and ask yourself if you are
really ready to have God remove this.
1. If your answer is yes move on to the next defect (patterns).
2. If not go back to Step One just for that defect and run over the First Step Questions to help
increase the pain of holding on to that defect.
3. If that is not enough to convince you, try this: We know that our problems, as with everything in
this life, is progressive. Our problems will worsen if nothing really changes at the level of our
habits (personal “reality”, patterns). With the passing of time we will get “better” at our defects.
Another way to increase the pain of holding on to this defect is by extending it into the future.
4. What will it be like if this does not change in another year or five, ten, or twenty years?
5. Have you had enough or are you thirsty for more?
6. If you are now ready, continue this process until you have gone over each and every one of your
defects.
(B)Lou-is: Going over each defect in such detail will help us in a number of ways:
a. It will help us with our owning each of our defects; our defects center in our own mind.
b. We will be reminded just how powerless we are to remove these defects alone and unaided.
c. At the same time by doing something constructive about these defects we will experience a
new level of hope.
d. It will help us see that some of our listed defects are just different parts of the same pattern.
This will help us combine them, which is part of the next suggestion.
If you have followed this suggested process, you have gone over and over your uncovered defects,
combining them into the smallest number of patterns. If you have not done that, please do so now.
Al: Yes, I have gone over them until I am even sick of them. I hope God is not too busy to remove
them quickly.
Lou-is: You sound like one of us, “Do it quickly, at least by Friday so I can have a great weekend”.
I find that I still have all the defects I had when I came in the Program. Those defects I have,
experienced some healing by God’s Grace, have become assets, tools, and Early Warning Signals.
Those defects do not come about as often; they don’t last long, and they are not very intense. This
is a sure sign of growth, and awakening.
85
Lou-is: We are building a new way of life and we feel it’s so very important to understand it is a
long-term process. It’s not another quick fix. We did not get here overnight but by practicing
limited, sick and sometimes insane patterns, habits for many years. One important thing to
remember is that if we do the best job we can with this Program we will experience a way of life
that is far beyond anything we could have dreamed of.
Lou-is: The next suggestion: Assign each of these defects, patterns a “Make Fun Of” name. These
names will become very important to us when setting up our last three Steps to live by. These will
be part of our Early Warning System. Speaking of “Make Fun Of” names, what about making fun
of names such as: Al Kohallek (Alcoholic), Allienon (Al anon), Lou-is Pazeniton (Lou is passing it
on), and Eye (I) Witness? No comment.
(C) We have reviewed our inventory after finishing our Fifth Step and updated our Rules/Patterns
List Boxes, page 75 Now we are to assign each of these defective Patterns a dishonoring name
"make fun of” name if you have not done so, or you may choose to change some of the names. We
will use these "Make Fun Of” names to help take some of the power away that we gave these
defects (patterns). Making fun of our defects and laughing at ourselves is in itself very healing. We
will go into the "HOW TO" in Step Ten. ACTION: 1. In column one write the “Make Fun Of”
name. 2. In column two write the pattern. 3. In column three write the number of that pattern.
See the Rules/Patterns List Boxes, p75
“Make Fun Of” Name RULE/PATTERN #
(D) Decide which of these defects you are now ready to have God remove. Fill in the corresponding #
# # # # # # # # # # # #
(E) Decide which of these defects you are unwilling or unable to let go of at this time. Fill in the
corresponding # - Go back to suggestions (A 3 through 7), to upgrade these defects to the “ready” list.
# # # # # # # # # # # #
For additional space you may use the facing pages.
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DAY 24 - Today is _____ _____ ______

Thank You.”
INDEX FOR THIS DAY’S ACTION – STEP SEVEN
STEP SEVEN - (HUMILITY)
HUMBLY ASKED HIM TO REMOVE OUR SHORTCOMINGS.
and follow suggestions on pages 88 – 90.
2. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous is page 76 second
paragraph - reading time 1 minute.
today’s reading.
Seven - Average reading time 14 minutes
chapter on Step Seven in Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. How do these
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We have come a long way by the time we get to this very important Step. We have realized in the
process of doing the first six Steps that:
1. We are truly lacking the power, the ability to really change. We are reminded that quick fixes
are no longer enough.
2. We have by this time come to understand that we cannot consistently manage this problem we
have been focusing on much less our total life.
3. We were able in most cases, to recall a time when something other than us, Higher than us,
different than us did for us what we could not do for ourselves.
4. By listing those people, places and things that we are grateful for, we realized that we had far
more than we thought. That list keeps growing as we add to it.
5. We begin to see how powerful our decisions and our willingness can be.
6. We begin to experience just how important it is that we set aside our old way of thinking and
feeling so we can have a chance for a new understanding.
7. By experiencing the above listed things, it is easy to see/feel the importance of turning
everything over to the kind of loving Higher Power, which we know has already helped us at
some point in our life. We do have an invisible means of support.
8. We experience by now some of the benefits of staying focused on what is before us, one
question or statement in one area, and our response to that area.
9. By responding as honestly as we could to the questions and statements, we have begun to realize
how we have been running on automatic with habits of thoughts and feelings and in our little
personal “reality” most of our lives.
10. We have identified some of our common patterns and we are starting to put them in their place
by dishonoring and discrediting, by making fun of them.
11. We have been open with our Higher Power, another human and ourselves about what we have
awakened to so far.
12. Most of us have had (experienced) great relief and a feeling of acceptance and of love. Some
have had a new God-consciousness.
13. We took a closer look at our defects, habits of thoughts and feelings, our personal “reality,” and
we are now sure that we want our Higher Power to remove these.
Al: I did not like the idea of having to write so much when I began this process or of committing to
working on it everyday. As I got into working it as part of the healing process, I saw it differently.
I realized at some point that I was not playing a game, nor was I looking for a quick fix any longer.
My life and the quality of my life were in question. Maybe an hour a day was after all a good
investment to bring about healing and awakening to my spiritual gifts.
Lou-is: I find it interesting that I would spend every waking moment for days on just one
resentment or fear. I was a lot like you, Al; when it came time to work on the healing process in the
beginning, I resisted the suggestion that I should spend at least an hour a day on the solution. Is that
insane or what?
Al: What is the difference between defects and shortcomings?
Lou-is: I heard that Bill W. was asked the same question and he replied that there was no real
difference. He just didn’t want to repeat the same word. However, sometimes our words have a
hidden meaning that we are unaware of. By the time I got to my Fifth Step I felt very defective.
Taking my Fifth Step with an understanding person and following it up with working on my Sixth
Step, I knew that I was defective, but I became really ready to have God correct and remove these
defects.
88
I was now aware of these defects. Just wanting to trust that a loving God could and would remove
my defective beliefs, habits, my little personal “reality,” gave me a new hope! The love I was being
shown allowed me to believe that it was not my being defective as my coming up short.
Al: As I reflected on my past wrongs, I thought: I have done a lot of harm to others and myself. It
was not my intention at the time to harm anyone, but I did. When these harms were taking place, as
I see now, I was reacting to my “then reality”. Because I received so much love, forgiveness, and
acceptance when I took my Fifth Step, I began to feel that it was more like a shortcoming, coming
up short. The root word for sin means missing the mark, and that is the way I have come to believe
a loving God views us. I am so grateful I had the experiences and the willingness to share them.
Lou-is: When I realized God, as I understood Him, was/is my only true Source, I was humbled at
that moment, opened up and teachable. When we are aware of the fact that it is our Higher Power,
and not ourselves, alone and unaided, who is to remove our shortcomings, our decision to follow
through becomes easier. If you are now ready and willing to be healed of these shortcomings, the
following suggestions will prove useful.
We are suggesting that you submit each of your shortcomings (patterns), to a form of the
Serenity Prayer.
God grant us the serenity to accept the things we cannot change,
Courage to change the things we can,
And wisdom to know the difference.
Some part of our shortcomings (defects, patterns, and personal “reality”) we may have to accept.
Example: We would be wise to accept the fact that we cannot change others, or what was done or
not done to us.
( A ). What is it about this pattern, shortcoming that I must accept?
Most of the time there is at least some part of a pattern we can change, which may be mental,
physical, emotional, social, or spiritual.
Example: We may not be able to stop one of our shortcomings that come into our consciousness,
but we can stop dwelling on it for one moment at a time.
( B ). What is it about this pattern, shortcoming that I can change?
Peace comes to us by grace. Most of us love the times when we experience even a few moments of
it. When we are at peace everything seems to be in harmony, and there is the absence of conflict.
Perhaps serenity is far more valuable in this human condition. Everything around us can be falling
apart, but if we have the grace of serenity, we just know at some deeper level all is going to work
out. We are suggesting that you ask for serenity as it may relate to each pattern.
89
Example: If we are going to be open to change and healing, then we need the wisdom to know
what we could change and what we need to accept. Sometimes we can be so sure we will be able to
change and we cannot. At times we assure ourselves that we have accepted something, and we find
that we have not even come close to acceptance. We are suggesting that you ask for courage and
wisdom as they relate to each pattern.
( C ). Ask God for the Serenity, Courage, and Wisdom to know the difference.
Follow this format for each of your shortcomings (patterns). Use the facing pages or separate pages
to complete this assignment.
90
DAY 25 - Today is _____ _____ ______

Thank You.”
INDEX FOR THIS DAY’S ACTION – STEP EIGHT
STEP EIGHT - (BROTHERLY LOVE, WILLINGNESS TO FORGIVE)
MADE A LIST OF ALL PERSONS WE HAD HARMED, AND BECAME WILLING TO
MAKE AMENDS TO THEM ALL.
and follow suggestions on pages - Eight Step assignments – take separate
sheets of paper or use the backs of the preceding pages to write out your three
lists. Just follow the examples on pages 92 - 93
2. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous is page 76 – 84
reading time 15 minute.
Eight - Average reading time 11 minutes
chapter on Step Eight in Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. How do these
91
Lou-is: Step Eight is another one of our Steps that in principle is so very simple. It is the
preparation for an all-important action, Step Nine. Like most things, we will do a much better job if
we are prepared to do so.
Al: So far every time you have made a point of just how simple something is going to be, you
“suggest” a lot of additional work. I already have my list (Step Eight Worksheet, p52).
Lou-is: The Step Eight Worksheet you filled in as you worked through your first Seven Steps is
indeed a very good start on this Step. I remembered some additional harms done while focusing on
Steps Five, Six, and Seven, when I was working on my patterns. Once I accepted the fact I had
been driven by my habit patterns, names of others I had harmed by expressing the same pattern
came to mind.
Al: What you call a very good start most people in the Program call a very good finish.
Lou-is: You’re right, but most of us settle for too little, for far too long. If we do the best we can on
the current Step, it makes the next Step easier, and better. I remind you, these are Steps not an
escalator. We cannot stop on Step One and ride to the top.
We suggest you make your list of those you had harmed in three (3) groups: First list those you
harmed and to whom you are ready, willing and able to make these amends. The second list is
made up of those harmed whom you are willing to make your amends to but unable to at this time.
The third group is the people harmed but you are unwilling to make amends to them. Also we have
included a format to help us with our forgiveness. Have you ever noticed a lot of those we harmed
were those whom we had not forgiven?
Now we are ready for your Step Eight Worksheet, p.52 (one of the take out worksheets) It should
have the names of those you harmed and the harm done.
[1] This first group is for those you are ready, willing, and able to make amends to now. On a
separate sheet of paper use the following format. We suggest that you go over your plan of action
with your sponsor or someone who has done some of their amends after you finished writing each
group, before you set out on your Step Nine adventures.
Example for group number [1] Name of the one you harmed. Sam M.
What you did or did not do to cause the harm. I thought that Sam had been bad mouthing me – so
I started telling a bunch of lies about him and it turned out that my information was wrong. Sam
had not said anything about me good or bad.
92
How will you go about making this amend? Write down your plan of action for each amends. I
had burned Sam with George, Mary, Sally and John so I am going to each of them and tell them I
was really wrong and I should not have ever said anything about Sam. And if they ever hear me
talk like that again about anyone tell me to take my own inventory. I am going to these people
instead of Sam because that is where the “crime” took place. It is no need to hurt Sam when he
didn’t even know I had said anything bad. I am ready, willing and able to make this amend. Now I
need to talk to my sponsor, Lou-is. I may have missed something so I want Lou-is to look this over,
if he says it’s ok the way I am intending, I will make an appointment with these four people and
make my amends ASAP.
[2] This group consists of those you are willing to make amends to but unable to for some reason at
this time. After you finished writing this list share your thoughts and feelings about these amends
with the person that is helping you work this Step. Ask yourself; are my reasons valid or am I just
fooling myself out of fear or some other form of resistance? For example, you may owe a great
deal of money and you don’t have it. You can at least talk to these people and come up with some
plan of action. In other words do all you can to upgrade this group to group one.
Example for group number [2] Name of the one you harmed. Mary Brown
What you did or did not do to cause the harm. I had an auto accident with Mary Brown – I got her
name and address and told her I was going to take care of her car. I lied to her about my address
and phone number so she could not get contact me, so I never paid her.
State why you are unable to make this amend now. Seek out someone to help you. I went by her
home address and she had moved away and left no forwarding address. The landlord did not have
any information that checked out. I am ready and willing but unable to find her. What shall I do?
[3] In this group are the ones you are resisting or saying "no never". Our Higher Power could help
if asked. We shall never be free holding on to the past. Pray for the willingness to take care of
these amends. Put these people on a prayer “hit list.” Pray for this person five times a day (upon
awakening, mid morning, noon, mid afternoon and before you go to sleep), for two weeks or
whatever time it takes for you to experience that you have let it go. Do all you can to upgrade this
group to group one or two.
Example for group number [3] Name of the one you harmed. Pete Duelittle, my ex-partner
What you did or did not do to cause the harm. I co-mingled my money and company money and
never paid it back when we dissolved the partnership. I do not intend to ever talk to him much less
give him any money. He jacked me around on another deal. I should have known better than
partner-up with him in the first place.
State the form of the resistance and/or why you are unwilling or unable to make this amend. Pete
has a lot more money than I do; he does not need my little co-mingled money. I hate him and the
horse he came in on. I would give a $100 not to even hear his name.
Eight Step assignments – take separate sheets of paper or use the backs of the preceding pages and
fill in all of your amends to be made on the Three Amends List. Just follow the examples l, 2 and 3
on pages 94 – 95.
93
DAY 26 - Today is _____ _____ ______

Thank You.”
INDEX FOR THIS DAY’S ACTION – STEP NINE
STEP NINE - (LOVE IN ACTION, JUSTICE - MAKING IT RIGHT)

MADE DIRECT AMENDS TO SUCH PEOPLE WHEREVER POSSIBLE, EXCEPT WHEN
TO DO SO WOULD INJURE THEM OR OTHERS.
1. Workbook assignment - Underline those things that were most useful for you and
follow suggestions on pages 95 - 96 (An amends format).
2. Build your amends contact list page 96
Nine - Average reading time 6 minutes.
chapter on Step Nine in Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. How do these
Lou-is: Al, as you begin this Step Nine I would remind you that, "Good judgment, a careful sense of
timing, courage, and prudence - these are the qualities we shall need when we take Step Nine." (12
and 12 Reprinted with permission) This Step will go a long way to heal a relationship or end it.
The main purpose is to let go of the past, to take walls down, to heal.
Al: I hear a lot about “Living Amends” I need some suggestions for those, as I can see I may be
doing a lot of those.
94
Lou-is: LIVING AMENDS - The best amends we can make for those we love and ourselves are
living amends, by practicing these principles in all our affairs. Walk our talk. In Step Eight we
wrote down some of the ways we were willing to make amends. At the time we may have been too
general. Now let’s be a little more specific. On a separate sheet of paper make a list of specific
things you are willing to do consistently as living amends.
and follow suggestions on pages 95 - 96 (An amends format).
INTO ACTION - After reviewing your Eighth Step Plan, make an appointment list. Make your
amends in person, face-to-face, if possible, unless it could cause more harm. For example, if the
person we need to make an amends to is an ex-lover, we need to question our motives. In addition,
if this person has someone else in his life, your contact could cause more harm. Once again it is
always wise to talk over your plan with your sponsor or another person that has some experience
with making amends. At each stage of the process it would be wise to ask your Higher Power for
the ability you need to be honest, willing and open-minded, loving, forgiving, wise or anything else
that comes to mind.
ACTION IS THE MAGIC WORD (An amends format)
1. Make an appointment, asking for a few minutes of their time to clear something up. Try not to
go into details at this time unless the person insists on doing so. This first contact is for the
purpose of making an appointment. On a separate sheet of paper set up your appointment
information, name – date – time – meeting place – phone number.
2. When you go for the appointment, you may say something like this; “I’m now in a Twelve-Step
Program, which suggests that I clear up my past by making amends or I may not get well.”
3. If this is/was a long term relationship, state the amends in general at first. This way the other
person can fill in the thing they felt was the harm done.
4. You may choose to say something like this, “I was wrong and I deeply regret all the ways I have
harmed you. I hope that I would do it differently now. I’m asking for your forgiveness, but you
may be unable to forgive me. I can truly understand. I’m not sure I could if the shoe were on
the other foot.”
5. If they want to open up an area or be more specific, by all means do so. You are there to have
the problem healed, to take walls down. So many times what you thought was the harm done
and what they thought it was, are not even close.
6. On the other hand, you may choose to state the thing you regret straight out
7. If it's money to be repaid, make the best payback plan you can for now, one you can keep.
Remember you are only giving back what was originally theirs.
8. If it is a relationship problem, ask what you can do to make it right
9. Remember to take your Higher Power with you. Be willing to forgive both them and yourself.
10. Most of the time if others see that we are sincere about this process, they are happy for us.
However, there may be times when it does not go well. You are there to clear up your side of
the street not theirs. So, get on with your life. Let your Higher Power do His Job, and you can
go about doing your own.
A General rule: Make amends where the harm is done. Example: You have burned someone
through gossip; make the amends to the one you gossiped with, and not the one you gossiped about.
95
Amends can be made to persons who have passed away. In your quiet time or meditation call this
person into your presence. Talk to them the same as you would if they were face-to-face. Or, you
may choose to write them a letter; saying all you need to say, then burn the letter. The most
important thing is that you both be FREE to get on with life, their new life and your new life.
2. Building your amends contact list page 96

For each of those you are going to be making an amends to take a separate sheet of paper and
include all the information you will need to carry out that amends. Most often it is more
effective to make your amends face-to-face but in some cases that will not be wise or possible.
Example:
Name: Sam Jones Phone # 210 555 3946 I made my appointment on Tuesday 2/6/07
My Amends Appointment is for: Date: 02/09/07 at Time: 2 PM
Amends to be done: Face-to-face at: 16607 Blanco Road Suite 401
San Antonio, Texas 78232
Amends will be done: On the telephone at #

Amends will be done: By mail – address
Amends will be done: By email – email address
Brief outline of what I want to cover:

1. I ask my Higher Power to cause me to have all the honesty, willingness and humility to
carry out this amends.
2. I’m now in a Twelve-Step Program, which suggests that I clear up my past by making
amends or I may not get well.
3. I was wrong and I deeply regret all the ways I have harmed you and the company. I hope
that I would do it differently now. I’m asking for your forgiveness, but you may be unable
to forgive me. I can truly understand. I’m not sure I could if the shoe were on the other
foot.
4. I co-mingled my money with company money; the best I can tell is about $600. I do not
have that much today but I have $50 and I agree to pay the rest out with interest at $50 a
month until I have repaid all. If I can pay it off quicker I will, but right now I know I can
do it at $50 a month.
5. I know that money will not restore the trust you once had for me and I do regret betraying
your confidence. I am here to show my intention to change. Thank you
6. If Sam will not accept my offer I will make the best deal I can without over-committing my
self.
7. Whatever Sam chooses to do I am grateful for the willingness to clear my side of the street
off.
Having done your prep work for the taking of Step Nine as best you could at this time
including making as many appointments as possible, you are ready for DAY 27 - the
day when you go about making your amends – Good luck and may God Bless you.
96
DAY 27 - Today is _____ _____ ______

Thank You.”
INDEX FOR THIS DAY’S ACTION – STEP NINE

This the day you start making your amends.
STEP NINE - (LOVE IN ACTION, JUSTICE - MAKING IT RIGHT)
MADE DIRECT AMENDS TO SUCH PEOPLE WHEREVER POSSIBLE, EXCEPT WHEN
TO DO SO WOULD INJURE THEM OR OTHERS.
1. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous is the Promises at

the bottom of page 83 and top of page 84.
3. Having done your prep work for the taking of Step Nine as best you could at
this time including making as many appointments as possible, you are ready
for this DAY 27 - the day when you go about making your amends. When you
start each of your amends you will find it useful to use your daily opening
affirmation.
4. Take your first appointment and work through your complete list the best you
can. Good luck and may God bless you.
5. If you have anyone in your number 3 group ([3] page 93), the ones you are
resisting or saying "no never", and you have been unable to upgrade them to
group number 1 or 2 follow the guidelines on page 98 on forgiveness.
97
FORGIVENESS is the key to all happy and loving relationships with God, others, and us.
Sometimes the hurt seems to be too much for us to forgive. In this case willingness to forgive is the
key. However, we may be unable or unwilling to forgive (check out the Forgiveness List Boxes).
For those whom we have a difficult time forgiving, it is suggested that you pray for the willingness
to forgive. Put these people on a prayer “hit list.” Pray for this person five times a day (upon
awakening, mid morning, noon, mid afternoon and before you go to sleep), for two weeks or
whatever time it takes for you to experience that you have forgiven.
Perhaps the most difficult is the forgiving of ourselves. There are a number of reasons for this, one
being the fact that we have too much inside information, including an abundance of experiences
when we have fallen short. We hear a lot of talk about this program and life in general being a
process, going from limited to less limited ad infinitum. However, most of us believe some day we
will graduate, once we get “it” right or when we earn “it.” Instead of seeing each experience as a
stepping-stone, we often view it as stumbling block, a cause for disappointment and this calls for
guilt and punishment. The beatings will continue until we become perfect. We would be far ahead
of the game if we would be willing to forgive quickly and seek correction, leaving the results to our
Higher Power.
One of the most common problems with forgiveness is the forgiveness of those with whom we have
had long-term relationships . We believe the primary reason is that we change the “crime” as the
years roll by. We have forgotten what we were upset about when the “crimes” happen and we read
in today’s understanding. The following format will help you let go of the past. God can and will
do for us what we cannot do for ourselves, if we trust Him.
On a separate sheet write out the following:
1. Name of the one who harmed you.
2. What did they do or not do to harm you?
3. How did you react at the time the harm was done?
4. How did you feel and/or think at the time the harm was done?
5. What about now? How do you feel and/or think about the harm done?
6. How do you react when you think of, hear about, or see the one that harmed you?
7. Go to the right hand column of the Forgiveness List Boxes page 61. Which of those items
stand out?
8. Are you now willing to forgive so you can be free?
9. Now ask your Higher Power to bring about this forgiveness at all levels, even for this one
moment. You can always take it back if you don’t care for the freedom. It is important to
seek the healing for the way you thought and felt at the time of the “crime” as well as the
present.
10. As a rule it is useful to follow up after the forgiveness with a visit or a call to make sure the
wall is down, unless it would cause the other person harm. When the thought of this person
comes to mind, bless them and turn again to your Higher Power.
Can you now upgrade your number 3 group to a group 1 or group 2? If not go back through the
Steps on that needed amends until you find a workable solution.
Keep your amends list until you have completed all of your amends. As you complete each one of
your amends write a brief summary of your experience. Would you do something different? If so
what? Share this experience with your sponsor or with another Program person.
98
December 2007 Printing
99

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A Twelve Step Workbook - Al Kohallek Goes Stepping

DAY PAGE DAY PAGE DAY PAGE

THE TWELVE STEPS OF THE TWELVE TRADITIONS OF

2. Workbook Reading assignment pages 1 through 8 – Underline those things that

CAUTION: THIS COULD BE HAZARDOUS TO YOUR OLD WAY OF LIFE.

2. Workbook Reading assignment pages 1 through 8 – Underline those things

INDEX FOR THIS DAY ACTION

An Eye (I) Witness Account

SAME BEGINNING AND ENDING

USEFUL CORNY SAYINGS

Today’s Mission Statement: Bill W. is the co-founder of Alcoholics Anonymous.

INCREASE THE PAIN

SIX ESSENTIAL CHARACTERISTICS

4. DISTORTION OF ATTENTION - Preoccupied with the object of our addiction or attachment,

1. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous is There is a Solution

DAY 5 - Today is _____ _____ ______

INDEX FOR THIS DAY ACTION

1. List those things you want changed. Choose one.

2. What pain or fear do you associate with changing this area?

3. What pleasure are you getting out of not changing?

4. What will it cost you if this does not change?

7. Have you lost self-respect and/or reputation due to this problem?

8. Has this problem made your home life unhappy?

1. Has this problem caused any type of illness? (Example)

DAY 6 - Today is _____ _____ ______

DAY 7 - Today is _____ _____ ______

INDEX FOR THIS DAY ACTION

Today’s Mission Statement: If we are working this 40-day Commitment on

DAY 8 - Today is _____ _____ ______

INDEX FOR THIS DAY ACTION

1. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous (The Chapter 4 We

DAY 9 - Today is _____ _____ ______

INDEX FOR THIS DAY ACTION

3. State what “to the care of God” means to you.

4. State what “as you understood Him.” means to you

2. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous is from the Fourth

DAY 10 - Today is _____ _____ ______

Introduction To Step Four 43 Forgiveness List Boxes [Supplement p62] 61

INDEX FOR THIS DAY ACTION

Introduction To Step Four

1. Workbook assignment is to read Introduction To Step Four pages 43 - 45

DAY 11 - Today is _____ _____ ______

ACTION (1) - Start with the Assets List Boxes p54

3. Today’s reading assignment from Alcoholics Anonymous is pages 63 - 71

MY PART LIST BOXES

AFFECTS MY LIST BOXES

1 Able to relate 12 Ambitions 23 Abnormal

DAY 12 - Today is _____ _____ ______

ASSET SUPPLEMENT LIST

DAY 13 - Today is _____ _____ ______

INDEX FOR THIS DAY ACTION – RESENTMENTS

Resentful The Cause Of My Resentment Asset My Part Affects

DAY 14 - Today is _____ _____ ______

WHO OR WHAT WHAT’S GOING ON WITH THIS FORGIVENESS

DAY 15 - Today is _____ _____ ______

INDEX FOR THIS DAY’S ACTION

1 Anger 9 Lust 17 Saving face

MY PART WHAT I DID OR DID NOT DO AS MY PART. (INTENSE OR VERY IMPORTANT)

AFFECTS MY LIST BOXES

AFFECTS MY SUPPLEMENT LIST

DAY 5 - Today is ___ _ ____

DAY 6 - Today is ___ _ ____

DAY 7 - Today is ___ _ ____

DAY 8 - Today is ___ _ ____

DAY 9 - Today is ___ _ ____

DAY 10 - Today is ___ _ ____

DAY 11 - Today is ___ _ ____

DAY 12 - Today is ___ _ ____

DAY 13 - Today is ___ _ ____

DAY 14 - Today is ___ _ ____

DAY 15 - Today is ___ _ ____

DAY 16 - Today is ___ _ ____

DAY 17 - Today is ___ _ ____

DAY 18 - Today is ___ _ ____

DAY 19 - Today is ___ _ ____

DAY 20 - Today is ___ _ ____

DAY 21 - Today is ___ _ ____

DAY 22 - Today is ___ _ ____

DAY 23 - Today is ___ _ ____

DAY 24 - Today is ___ _ ____

DAY 25 - Today is ___ _ ____

DAY 26 - Today is ___ _ ____

DAY 27 - Today is ___ _ ____