Happiness, joy and love are not caused by events but by our attitude.

We can learn to
choose how we want to feel. Why not choose love and joy?

THE WORLD OF FEELINGS AND

EMOTIONS
by Walter Last

We all would like to live a happy, healthy and fulfilled life, yet few seem to be
able to do just that. Why must we have so much suffering, failures and
disappointments? We just want to be secure in a loving relationship and a
satisfying job with a good income and enjoy ourselves.

Instead, our relationships turn sour all too soon, we have a job that we do not
like or we do not have one at all, there is never enough money and generally
there is not much joy to be found anywhere. As a result we feel resentment,
hopelessness, depression, perhaps also anger and hatred. Where and why
did it all go wrong?

I believe that there is a way out of this depressing jungle of negativity and
disappointments. I actually believe that we can make a decision to have a
happy, fulfilled life and then really do it. What I cannot promise is that it will be
easy. It needs either willpower and determination or the help of good friends.
But you have nothing to lose by trying and each step in the right direction is
likely to bring some reward.

We can be happy or at least accepting in adversity and unhappy when we

seem to have everything. What decides how we will react and how we will feel
inside? It is no secret to psychologists that we are programmed since earliest
childhood by everything that went on around us, but especially by the way our
parents talked to us and to each other, by the way they felt and reacted and
by the interactions with our siblings. We became programmed by observing
and imitating our role models.

If we were lucky and grew up in a happy and loving family, we probably have
an inner program that makes it easy for us to lead a happy life in a loving
relationship. If, on the other hand, there was much worry, anger, resentment
and other negativity in our childhood, chances are that we will have a hard
time being happy and loving as adults. That probably applies to most of us;
we are victims of negative programming, during childhood.

If we really want to change, there is only one thing to do: we must change our
subconscious programming from a negative outlook on life to a positive one.
Unfortunately, we cannot simply decide that from now on we will be happy
and loving. Such conscious decisions on their own have little influence on our
subconscious programming. In fact, if there is a conflict between our
subconscious programming and our conscious will, the subconscious will
always win.
Therefore, we must be clever and beat the subconscious at its own game. We
must throw the old program out and devise a new one that allows us to be as
we really want to be. However, it is not sufficient just to work with our feelings
and emotions because these do not arise out of a vacuum. Our emotions are
conditioned by our beliefs. We react more to our beliefs than to facts or
anything else. Therefore, we must adopt an appropriate belief system.

Where do we find the beliefs we want? It is not sufficient trying to believe that
we will be happy ever after. Our proposed new beliefs must be believable to
be acceptable to both, our conscious and our subconscious mind. It must be
something that gives meaning to our life that makes sense of it all. Meaning is
the opposite to the inner emptiness that many of us try to fill with pleasure
seeking and power games, causing so much emotional trouble in the end and
depression if we fail. My solution is a spiritual philosophy of life that turns
emptiness into meaning.

In addition, there is also a strong influence of physical factors on our

emotional life, such as nutrition and tense muscle structures. Therefore, in
order to heal our emotions properly, we must work on all four levels of our
being, the biological, the emotional, the mental and the spiritual level.

OUR LOST FEELINGS

With our feelings and emotions we experience ourselves in this world. They
are the driving force, the power, and the motor of our life. Without feelings and
emotions we would be like robots, a computer operating a body with the help
of electric signals.

It is the feelings and emotions, our likes and dislikes, that give our life
meaning, that make us happy or unhappy, fulfilled or dissatisfied and that to a
large degree decide our course of action and even our health. Diseases not
only make us feel unwell, but negative and suppressed emotions and feelings
are a major contributing factor in causing our diseases.

When we are young, we are full of feelings and emotions, we experience

them strongly, we are sensitive and react immediately and directly to our
social and physical environment. When we are old, our emotions are only a
distant memory and even our feelings are greatly diminished, pain is often the
only feeling left.

More and more we do act like a robot with compulsive habits and live only in
our head, using our body just to carry our brain around. What happened in
between, why and how did we lose our feelings and emotions, our sensitivity?

Many scientists at present are so divorced from their feelings and emotions
that they actually believe that these originate in the brain, just like a form of
thoughts. They come to this conclusion because they do not feel the actual
energy of anger in their body or the love in their heart. They just think anger or
think love in the brain and act accordingly without really feeling anything or
their feelings are only weak and diffuse.
Feelings provide us with the greatest pleasures in life, but also with the
greatest suffering. Suffering actually is the key word for our loss of feeling with
advancing age. We do not want to suffer, so we intentionally diminish our
feelings in order to diminish the amount of emotional pain that we do feel. As
an unintended side effect this also reduces the amount of pleasure that we
can feel.

Hand in hand with our reduced overall feelings goes also a reduced
enjoyment of life, reduced vitality and an increased susceptibility to chronic
degenerative diseases. A high price to pay for reducing the suffering that we
might feel. In fact, we have exchanged bouts of intense short-term suffering
for more low-key long-term suffering.

In this chapter we will look more closely at the mechanism that causes us to
lose so much of our feeling and the price we have to pay for this.

SOME DEFINITIONS

You may be somewhat confused about the difference between feelings and
emotions and dictionaries are of not much help either. Therefore, I like to
define the terms commonly associated with the world of feelings as they are
used in this book.

'Feelings' in a general sense, are what we may feel in any part of our body.
These may be simple body sensations, such as hot or cold, pain, a touch or
else they may be feelings associated with emotions, such as love or hate, joy
or anger.

Feelings generated by mechanical or chemical means, commonly from the

outside will be called 'body sensations' or simply 'sensations'.

'Emotions', on the other hand, are feelings or reactions about someone or

something, and usually involving our ego. We are angry about someone,
afraid of something, in love with someone. These emotions may be directly
felt in the body or we may just react strongly with thoughts or verbal displays
originating from our head.

This means, we may have a strong reaction without actually being aware of a
feeling in the body. We may even smash something in anger without feeling
the energy of the anger itself in our body. I call this 'cold anger', a strong
emotion without feeling.

A 'feeling' is the inner body experience that we have if we can directly feel the
energy associated with an emotion. However, we may also deliberately
produce feelings as in meditation and feel and radiate love or compassion to
our planet or humanity or groups or individuals. I do not regard these as
emotions.

Another group of feelings are associated with energy flows within the body
that we may experience during meditation, guided imagery, bodywork or other
forms of healing. We may experience a part of our body become warm or
tingling or notice pleasant streamings in the pelvic area, we may also feel our
muscles being tense or relaxed, our head being clear or congested.

Another possibility is a dispassionate feeling about something in an impartial

judgement. At a crossroad, for instance, we may feel a preference for one
road over the other. In most instances, however, this is not a proper body
feeling but an intuition or hunch, which remains just a brain affair.

'Moods' are generalised feelings usually beyond our conscious control, and
often with a somewhat negative connotation. 'Sentiments' are more tender
feelings but usually about something and may then be grouped with the
emotions. 'Desires', too, are about 'something' and, therefore, emotions.
'Passions' are generally regarded as strongly felt and expressed emotions.

Earlier I mentioned the 'ego'. I regard the ego as the self-centred, self-
preserving and individualising part of our overall personality. Generally, the
ego causes us to react 'emotionally' from suppressed feelings instead of with
direct feelings appropriate for the situation at hand.

HOW WE LOST OUR FEELINGS

The widespread emotional misery in our society has much to do with our
diminished capacity for feelings, especially for tender, loving feelings. If at all,
we seem to experience these only for a short period in our life when we fall in
love and then yearn for them ever after.

The repression of our feelings has much to do with the male inspired cultural
priority placed on the intellect in our society with a corresponding contempt for
soft and tender feelings that are regarded as feminine. It is easier to gain
power, to dominate and build an empire if one is not hindered by sentimental
feelings. With their present bid for equal power, even many women cannot
afford any more to be vulnerable and they steel themselves against feminine
softness.

In addition, self-control is highly valued, especially in the Anglo-Saxon culture.

We are not supposed to show anger or even displeasure but rather be
outwardly polite while we may boil inside. Only in recent years has it become
more acceptable to show tenderness in public, but even so, cuddling and
touching, except in a ceremonial way, are still largely constricted to those who
identify with the 'New Age Movement'. Conventional members of our society
are as rigid and inhibited as ever.

We may say that our emotional dilemma arises from two sources. One is the
suppression of our feelings enforced by the standards of our society and the
other is the lack of role models for the development of tender feelings in our
childhood.

Suppression of our feelings starts as infants when we are trained not to cry
when we are unhappy. We may be just left to cry without response until we
realise it is useless to express our frustration. Especially suppressed are any
expressions of childhood sexuality such as playing with the genitals and even
cuddling the parent of the opposite sex or generally adults of the opposite sex.

Such contact is important for later developing mature emotional relationships

with our adult sexuality. Unfortunately, there is now a perception to regard
such adults as potential child molesters and they intentionally hold back,
depriving themselves and the children of this essential expression of affection.

Also at an early age we are trained in the use of social lies and social
conventions and discouraged to express our true feelings. It is even worse at
school and university where we are overwhelmed by purely intellectual activity
of an unimaginative kind. This greatly inhibits our creativity and intuitive
abilities. Many great inventors and innovative scientists like Einstein, for
instance, did not make their discoveries by thinking but rather through
intuition. For the rest of his life Einstein reportedly tried to understand on the
mental level what he had perceived intuitively in a flash.

Creativity is the active outlet for the meaning we give to our life, and intuition
is an important link between both. This combination gives satisfaction and
perpetual joy and happiness to our life but it is crushed by our education
system in order to prepare us for the later institutionalised conformity in our
work place. A more suitable alternative would be an education system based
on the model of the Rudolf Steiner or Montessori schools.

ROLE MODELS

The presence of positive role models for our emotional development is most
important during infancy because then we are most impressionable and learn
the fastest. At this age we learn to feel by absorbing feelings from our
surrounding like a sponge. This activates our feeling centres. If we are
radiated with love, our capacity to feel love develops, if we are exposed to
anger, then that is what we learn.

I believe that because of their own love-deficient upbringing, most parents just
act lovingly towards their children from a mental level without actually feeling
it. The most common exception is non-intellectual, soft and 'feminine'
mothers, especially as personified by the typical Polynesian woman.

In many third-world countries it is common for whole families to sleep in the

same room where children may be aware of the sexual activity of their
parents. This is natural as it is in the animal kingdom and provides role
models for subconscious programming. But it is essential that the sexual
interaction, like any other interaction of the parents, is loving. This imprinting
is most important for infants and does not need to interfere with our more
inhibited western morals for older children who, unlike infants, prefer their own
rooms anyway.

The lack of tender feelings combined with an exposure to negative emotions

from the parents in early life has much to do with the present culture of
violence in our society. This is constantly reinforced by the bombardment with
violence on the screens. With their tender feelings undeveloped, many do not
feel the suffering of others, they simply cannot feel compassion. That may
start with cruelty to animals as children and lead to individualised or
institutionalised cruelty and torture as adults.

A national football coach is quoted as saying that to be successful in a contact

sport you must build up a hate for the opponent before the game. He is right
in that this releases stored up negative energies and it may even be good that
it does. Even the many onlookers may release some of their negative
energies. But is this the kind of society we want where our role models require
hatred to perform? There must be a better way!

MUSCLE ARMOURING

Muscle armouring is a concept discovered by Wilhelm Reich, an eminent

psychiatrist and at one time the apparent heir to the position of Sigmund
Freud. Reich found that the emotional disorders of his patients were to an
amazing degree reflected in their body structures. In particular, patients with
repressed feelings commonly had hard, rigid and permanently contracted
muscles in certain areas of their body. Different kinds of negative emotions
seemed to be associated with specific muscles.

Reich compared these rigid muscle structures to the armour of a medieval

knight and called the process of their formation 'armouring'. While the steel
armour of the knight had the purpose of protecting him against physical
aggression, the muscle armour serves to protect us against emotional
aggression.

At first glance it may sound somewhat far-fetched that contracted muscles

should have anything to do with how we feel. But we can easily observe
ourselves that we become tense when we are apprehensive, while our
muscles relax when we are at ease. When we expect someone to cause us
pain, such as sticking a needle into us or hitting us, we automatically tense
our muscles and we may even hold our breath by contracting our diaphragm.

These are automatic body reflexes designed to diminish the expected feeling
of pain. However, we may use the same mechanism if we want to diminish
feelings for other reasons. As an infant we may have been afraid of being
separated from our mother, of being left alone in a strange surrounding, so we
tensed up and held our breath. Eventually we had to continue breathing but
we did it rather shallow with contracted diaphragm and chest muscles.

With repeated fear responses these muscle contractions may gradually

become permanent. The child may grow to develop a narrow chest with weak
lung functions or if only the diaphragm remains contracted, a barrel chest may
result. In both instances breathing remains permanently shallow and the child
is susceptible to lung infections and asthma. In babies this may be a
contributing factor in cot death or SIDS. The advantage of the armoured chest
or permanently contracted diaphragm is that we now do not feel our fear any
more, it remains subconscious. However, we gradually may develop
substitute outlets of our fear, such as being afraid of heights or of public
speaking, and so forth.

Another example is the suppression of anger because we are told that it is not
socially acceptable to show it openly. We may initially feel an angry emotion
rushing upwards from the abdomen to the shoulder in order to hit out or to the
throat to shout. When we suppress these impulses the emotional energy of
the anger becomes stuck in the shoulder or in the throat and tenses the
muscles tension there.

If this tension is not released by other means it may become permanent and if
we continue our suppressive behaviour pattern, these muscles become
permanently severely contracted. In joints surrounded by contracted muscles
we easily develop arthritis, while contracted throat muscles give us a weak
voice and possibly stuttering and other speech and throat problems.

The muscle armouring becomes stronger and stronger with advancing age
because we tend to repeat our set behaviour pattern over and over again.
This then forms our distinctive facial features, our body structures and our
increasing rigidity. There are, of course, other factors that contribute to
shaping our body and making it more inflexible, such as heredity, nutrition and
occupational muscle use.

PAIN AND DISEASE

There are many reports that demonstrate the strong influence of our feelings
and emotions on health and disease. One example is a study of the survival
rate of women with breast cancer. After ten years 70% of those who reacted
to the diagnosis with a fighting spirit were still alive, while those who reacted
with denial had a 50% survival rate, stoic acceptance gave 25% and of those
who felt hopeless and helpless only 20% survived.

Other findings show that cancer frequently is diagnosed about a year after a
traumatic event, such as losing a spouse. Also the negative effect of mental
depression on our immune system is well known, while we feel and to some
degree are invincible when we are in love. Our digestive juices are inhibited
when we are upset or stressed, and asthma attacks may be triggered by fear
or apprehension.

Generally, we can distinguish between acute or immediate influences of

strong emotions and the long-term or chronic effects of unexpressed
emotions. The immediate reaction is due to the direct influence of our feelings
on the hormone-producing endocrine glands and on the nervous system.
More insidious, however, are the long-term effects of muscle armouring
caused by suppressed emotions.

At the physical or body level this leads to poor blood circulation and a reduced
supply of nutrients to the affected area while metabolic wastes and toxins tend
to accumulate similar to sediments in a slow-flowing part of a river. In addition,
permanently contracted muscles generate a great strain on associated joints.
A combination of these factors makes us susceptible to the development of
arthritis. Armouring of the chest and diaphragm commonly leads to respiratory
diseases.

Wilhelm Reich found that his cancer patients had severely inhibited sexual
energies caused by strong armouring in the pelvic and abdominal areas.
Those patients who could most successfully free their sexual energies had the
best chances of recovering. He regarded cancer as a 'shrinking biopathy' of
the total energy field of the patient. This shrinking was seen as a forerunner
and not as a consequence of the disease. Tumours are only the final stage of
the shrinking process. When he succeeded in regressing the tumour, making
it disappear, without revitalising the general energy flow, the patient would die
anyway. Spontaneous remissions, on the other hand, may in some instances
be due to a revitalised energy flow.

Another aspect of armouring is the generation of pain. The resistance of a

contracted muscle to the flow of energy produces pain similar to the heat
produced by the resistance of a thin wire to the flow of electricity. Short-term
muscle contraction uses energy, therefore it causes no pain and can be used
as a defence against expected emotional or physical pain.

However, if a muscle remains contracted with continued energy flow, pain is

produced either directly or noticeable as tenderness only when the muscle is
pressed. I often could stop pain in patients immediately by pressing into tense
muscles or relax them with other methods. Finally, in a permanently
contracted muscle that has become like a rope or sheet, the energy flow to
the area is so diminished that there is no pain, even when pressed. Repeated
deep muscle massage may eventually restore energy flow and temporary
pain to the muscle. Some individuals can clairvoyantly perceive these energy
flows.

Another problem with suppressed negative emotions is the possibility that

under provocation they may be released explosively in an act of violence. This
pattern is now very common in our society. On the other side of the fence are
those sensitive souls who are full of bottled-up feelings and emotions but
unable to release and express them. This drains their vitality and they suffer
from poor circulation with low blood pressure, cold hands and feet and lack of
energy.

BODY LANGUAGE

Our emotions have a strong influence not only on our glands and inner organs
but also on our external body structure. Certain emotions are traditionally
linked with problems in certain organ functions. Anger, for example, damages
the liver and conversely, irritability and quick temper are partly caused by liver
problems. In a similar way, grief, negativity and anxiety are linked to the lungs;
fear to the kidneys and intestines; excessive laughter or lack of joy to the
heart and worry to the spleen.
Emotions, if not released in outward action, solidify by causing muscle
contractions. The stronger the energetic charges of the emotion, the stronger
the muscle contractions. Other parts of the body, on the other hand, may be
more or less blocked off from the flow of emotional energies, and these parts
will become weak and start wasting. By examining our body, we can get a
reasonably good idea of the kind of emotional problems that have helped to
shape it and, furthermore, of the corrective measures to be taken in order to
improve ourselves

The following compilation can be only a summary one; for further information
see Body-Mind by Ken Dychtwald.

SUMMARY OF BODY LANGUAGE

Legs
Show how we move through life:
Weak, underdeveloped : no firm stand in life.
Massive, overdeveloped : rigidly grounded - needs to explore, let go.
Fat, sluggish : to move through life - needs enthusiasm, jogging.
Thin tight : moves energetically through life but often erratic, not gracefully -
needs to develop tranquillity.

Pelvis
Shows condition of our sexuality :
Front tipped downward, causing hollow back (lordosis) : usually strong
sexual energy, but full flow is blocked through constant self-control, not able
to let go - develop faith in higher guidance.
Front tipped upward, causing flat low back : lessening of sexual focus, lack
of tender feelings in the lower part of the body - learn to lower attention from
chest to lower abdomen, develop tender emotions.

Belly
The centre of emotions as they relate to ourselves.
Enlarged in upper half : rugged, outgoing, masculine - develop more tender
feelings.
Enlarged in lower half : blocked energy flow to pelvis and legs, especially if
abdominal wall is hard - let go.
Moderately enlarged : if belly is soft and back not very hollow -good contact
with body vitality, possibly emotionally too soft.
Overall enlarged but obese : usually poor contact with vital energies
Overall flat, contracted : too much mental control, no 'gut feelings', strong
emotional blocks (fear, anxiety) - develop tender emotions, have faith, let go.

Chest
Modifies our emotions as they relate to our intentions with reference to
ourselves.
Narrow contracted : feeling of inferiority, lack of power, unexpressive - learn
to communicate, to give, chest breathing.
Wide expanded : feeling of superiority, power, expressive - learn to
experience tender feelings within, especially in pelvis, learn from others,
abdominal breathing.

Shoulders
Show how we carry our burdens through life.
Bowed rounded : feel overburdened - develop power, chest breathing, have
faith.
Raised : chronic fear - anxiety-releasing therapy, chest breathing.
Square : carries responsibility - relax.
Forward hunched : fear of being hurt, self-protection - develop power, chest
breathing.
Pulled back, retracted : forceful control or suppression of unwanted
emotions, especially anger - let go, express yourself in a suitable way.
Narrow : cannot shoulder responsibilities - become more powerful.
Right side lower : interacts in a predominantly masculine way.
Left side lower : interacts in a predominantly feminine way.

Arms
Show how we express ourselves in physical actions.
Weak, underdeveloped : lack of initiative and physical expression - learn to
communicate through your arms.
Massive, over-muscled : insensitive, forceful interactions, lack of grace -
learn to be gentle.
Thin, tight : inability to hold on to anything - become more peaceful, settled.
Fat, underdeveloped : sluggishness in expressing yourself - become
stimulated, animated.

Upper Back
A channel for the expression of forceful or violent emotions.
Soreness, hump : repressed anger or hitting reflex - let go, hit a pillow or
sand bag.

Neck
Reflects tension between body emotions and mental control.
Bent forward : explores the world first in a rational way, emotional exhaustion
- develop your 'gut feeling'.
Bent to the right : arrogance, defiance - become centred.
Bent to the left : playful attitude
Long, graceful : proud attitude.
Heavy, short : forceful attitude.

Throat
A channel for vocal expression of emotions.
Tight, sore, weak : blocked verbal expressions of emotions and tears - let go,
speak out, weep.

Jaw and Chin

A channel for verbal expression, biting.
Receding : frozen, suppressed verbal emotions - learn to speak out.
Protruding : determined.
Strongly protruding : defiance, arrogance - relax.
Clenched : forceful self-control, suppressed anger - let go, relax.

Face
An outside mirror of our emotions.
Changing expressions : show how we wish to appear to the world.
Chronically tense muscles : show conflict between what we show and how
we really feel.

Eyes
The 'windows of the soul', reflecting health and emotions.
Large, round : warm, loving personality.
Protruding : reaching out forcefully (thyroid problems).
Deep-set : critically observing, withholding expression.
Wide-open baby eyes : tries to hold, to draw close, not fully matured.
Nearsightedness : frozen fear (early childhood), focus on immediate
problems, introspective, rational - release fear, look into the future.
Farsightedness : suppressed anger, focused outward, extrovert -release
anger, develop inner self.

CHARACTER STRUCTURE

The same emotions and suppressed feelings that shape our body and are
expressed in our 'body language' form also our character. Wilhelm Reich
believed that without suppressed feelings we would not have a character, as
we know it. We would all be open, free and loving in our relationships and
dealings with each other.

Suppressed feelings, on the other hand, inhibit the free flow of feeling
energies in our body and this causes us in our social interactions to react
subconsciously to our suppressed feelings rather than to the immediate
situation at hand. The various forms of inhibition of the free and natural flow
and expression of feelings in different individuals are their 'character'.

Depending on the nature of our suppressed feelings, Wilhelm Reich and his
followers in bio-energetic and other forms of psychodynamic bodywork
commonly distinguish between five character structures: schizoid, oral,
psychopathic, masochistic and rigid. Commonly we represent mixtures of two
or more of these types but with one character type usually dominant. The
following is a condensation of the works of Alexander Lowen, John Pierrakos
and Barbara Brennan.

The Schizoid Character

In the schizoid individual the main emotional trauma occurred around the time
of birth. This may have been a distressing birth process or hostility from one
or both parents towards the baby, commonly the baby was unwanted and it
felt abandoned by the mother, either physically or emotionally.
The baby deals with this by withdrawing into itself, closing itself off from the
world. This same technique is then used in later life whenever the individual
feels threatened. The basic subconscious fear or anxiety is the feeling of
being unwanted, having no right to exist, a psychological split between the
desire to live in the physical world and a wish to withdraw into the spirit world.

In communications with others this type tends to intellectualise and use

impersonal language. The body structure is with elongated limbs and digits
and weak joints, the body appears uncoordinated with right-left imbalances
and often cold hands and feet. The energy structure is 'ungrounded' or 'airy-
fairy' with frozen core energies. Schizoids tend to be rather spiritual and
creative but in need of grounding and becoming an integrated whole.

The Oral Structure

The oral phase of our development is the period when we are totally
dependent on the mother and normally breast-fed. The normal emotional
development may be interrupted when the baby feels abandoned because the
mother may have left or died or is when sick or for other reasons she could
not fulfil the baby's need for physical and emotional nourishment.

The child is forced to become independent too early but that leaves it insecure
with a tendency to cling and grab, it has a decreased natural aggressiveness
with an increased inner need to be taken care of. There is a subconscious
fear of being left alone, not getting enough or what one wants or needs. The
individual feels deprived and empty and does not want to take responsibility.
Resentment is common and a forced show of independence easily crumbles
under stress.

The oral personality has experienced many disappointments and rejections

and feels a strong need for warmth and support from a mothering partner. In
later life s/he may become bitter because there was never enough to be
satisfied, 'the world is unjust'.

The body is generally underdeveloped and may look immature with a weak,
narrow chest and shallow breathing. The energies are mainly in the head with
a good intelligence, while the body energies and emotional energies are
rather subdued. The main task in personal development is to give up playing
the victim and learn to trust that the universe will provide.

The Psychopathic Personality

The psychopathic structure emerges in early childhood due to a covertly

seductive parent of the opposite sex. The child was antagonistic to the parent
of the same sex and tried to get what it wanted by manipulating the parent of
the opposite sex. This pattern is continued in adult life by trying to gain power,
control and desire fulfilment by manipulating others.

Deep inner feelings of inferiority are covered by superficial feelings of

superiority and contempt. This person believes: "I am right, you are wrong",
s/he wants to win and does not take defeat easily. Inwardly the psychopath
feels the need for others but fears appearing to be dependent or even look
like a victim. Pleasure comes second to conquest and control. Needs are
fulfilled by making others need him or her. The will is the predominant mental
function.

The upper half of the body is commonly overdeveloped and the lower half
underdeveloped. The chest is wide but the pelvis narrow and the legs weak.
Correspondingly, the main energy flows are centred in and around the upper
body and the front of the head. The life task is to learn true surrender and
humility by admitting the inner longings and needs.

The Masochistic Character

The parents and especially the mother were domineering and gave love in a
conditional way. The mother may have been self-sacrificing and the child was
made to feel guilty whenever it was resisting and trying to assert itself. This
made it feel trapped, defeated and humiliated. Therefore, the real feelings
were held inside and creativity suppressed. Much anger, hate and resentment
is hidden underneath a submissive and polite exterior.

The individual complains a lot and dwells on the negative side of things. By
subconsciously provoking others s/he may be given an excuse to become
angry, to let of steam, but generally the outward attitude is to please others.

The body may be heavily built with overdeveloped muscles and short neck
and waist. Tensions are strongest in the neck, jaw, throat and pelvis. The
energies and emotions are internalised. To become free, the masochist needs
to express feelings and become more assertive and aggressive.

The Rigid Structure

The child felt its sexuality rejected, especially by the parent of the opposite
sex. Sexuality at this age may mean innocently touching or playing with the
sexual organs which is strictly forbidden by the parent, and a longing to be
close to the parent of the opposite sex by being touched and cuddled remains
unfulfilled. The child deals with this perceived rejection by developing a rigid
muscle structure that makes it easier to suppress the feelings of wanting and
longing.

As an adult the rigid individual will hold back, remain controlled, holding back
the expression of feelings and not daring to surrender. Pride does not allow
him or her to reach out to fulfil his or her needs; instead s/he prefers to
manipulate to get what s/he wants.

While there is a high degree of outer control and success in the social and
physical world, the rigid person tries to protect the inner vulnerability and is
afraid of getting hurt. A strong ego is used to avoid letting go of inner feelings.
A common complaint is that s/he does not experience strong feelings.
The energies remain on the periphery while the core is contracted. The body
is well balanced and appears energetic and integrated. The individual needs
to open up and share all feelings.