Hitagi Crab

001

Senjougahara Hitagi was widely known to be a sickly girl; so it is

not surprising that she would be exempt from physical education
classes. Even during morning assemblies, she would sit in the shade
because of her anemia. Although Ive been in the same classes as her
for three years in high school, I've never seen her move so actively.
She frequently visited the nurses office, and because of hospital
checkups, she often either came to class late, left early, or was
absent altogether. Many of my classmates joke that the hospital is
her home.

Even though she's sick, she's far from insubstantial. As if she was as
thin as a thread, she gives off the impression that she would break
at the slightest touch. For that reason, perhaps, the boys in our class
half-joked that she might be the heiress to some big company. It
seemed almost plausible. Even I think that suits Senjougahara.

In the corner of the room, Senjougahara always read by herself.

Sometimes it would be a hard cover book, but sometimes it would
be one of those comics that lower your IQ. She seemed to be quite
indiscriminate in her choice of books. Maybe because she reads
anything with words, though there may be quality in her choice in
books.

She's intelligent and at the top of the class.

She's always in the top ten on the ranking list announced after
examinations, in every subject. Although its presumptuous to
compare her to someone like me (who fails every subject except
mathematics), it must be because our brains are constructed
differently.

It seems like she doesn't have friends.

Not a single one.

I've never seen her talking with anyone. From my point of view, the
sight of her reading a book the very action of her reading a book
may have created a wall around her. Because of that, though I've
been seated beside her for a little more than 2 years, I can
confidently say that I have never talked with her. Unfortunately.
With regards to her voice, I've only heard her say "I don't know" in
reply to the teacher's questions in class. (Though I don't know if she
really knew the answer or not, she always replied with "I don't
know".) In the specialized domain of the school, it was common for
people without friends to form groups with other people without
friends (in other words, a colony). Actually, I was in such a group
until last year. However, Senjougahara is an exception to this rule.
Of course, she's not being bullied either. For better or worse, Ive
never seen her being a victim. I've always taken for granted that she
would always be in that corner of the classroom, reading her books.
She had created a wall around herself.

Her presence there was a given.

Her absence here was expected.

Well, it doesn't matter.

After spending three years in high school, with two hundred

students per level between first years to third years, senpais,
kouhais, classmates, and all the teachers making up nearly a
thousand people together in the same space, I've begun to wonder
how many of these people I know personally. I think anyone would
find my answer depressing.

Even if a miracle happened and you shared the same class with
someone for three years, I don't think that youd feel lonely not
exchanging any words with that person. It just ends up as a
memory that such a person had existed. Even though I don't know
what will happen to me a year after I graduate from high school, I
probably won't have a reason to remember Senjougahara's face, nor
be able to do so.

That's fine with me. It should be the same for Senjougahara as well.
Not only for her, but it should be the same for everyone in the
school. It must be wrong to even think about such a thing as
depressing.

That was what I thought.

But.

On one particular day.

To be truthful, Id just ended a hellish excuse for a spring break,

became a third year student, and saw the end of a nightmarish
Golden Week. It was the 8th of May.

As previously mentioned, I had a tendency for tardiness, and was

therefore rushing up the stairs of the school building. At that
moment, a girl fell from the sky.

The girl was Senjougahara Hitagi.

To be truthful, she probably didn't fall from the sky. She'd probably
tripped on the stairs and fell backwards. I could have dodged it, but
I chose to catch her and break her fall.

It seemed like a better choice than dodging.

No, it was most probably a mistake.

Because.

Because Senjougahara, whom I caught and hence stopped her fall,

was veryimpossibly light. No kidding, she was mysteriously,
eerily, light.

As though she wasn't even there. That's right. Senjougahara was so

light, it was as if she had no weight.

002

"Senjougahara-san?" Hanekawa tilted her head to the side,

puzzlement in her eyes. "What about Senjougahara-san?"

"You know - " I hesitated. "I'm just, curious."

"You dont say."

"You know, like, she has a weird name, doesn't she?"

"Senjougahara is the name of a place."[1]

"Well, it's not that, I'm talking about her first name."
"If Im not wrong, her first name is Hitagi, isnt it? It's not really
weird. If I remember correctly, it's a term related to public works.
[2]

"You really know everything..."

"I don't know everything. I just know what I know." Although

Hanekawa did not seem satisfied with my answer, she did not
persist, but only commented offhandedly. "It's quite rare for
Araragi-kun to take notice of other people."

I told her it was none of her business.

Hanekawa Tsubasa.

She's the class representative.

She is a girl with the air of a class representative, with proper

glasses, rule-abiding, awfully serious and popular with teachers,
one of the rare breeds that only exist in anime and manga these
days.

She has been the class representative all her life, and has an air
about her that suggests she will continue to be a class representative
all her life, and is the representative of all representatives. There are
rumours that she might have been chosen by a god to be a class
representative (just me, actually.)

We were in different classes for the first and second year of school
and only ended up in the same class for third year. Even before we
were in the same class, I had heard about Hanekawa's existence. It
was a given; if Senjougahara was in the top of the class every year,
Hanekawa was the top student. She attains full marks for all five or
six subjects as if it was a walk in the park, and even now, I can
remember her inhuman feat. In the term tests of the first semester of
our second year, including Physical Education and Fine Arts, the
only mistake she made was on a trick question in History. She was
so famous, even if I didn't want to, I would have ended up hearing
about her.

And.

Unfortunately, no, it might be a good thing, but it doesn't discount

the fact that it's irritating. Hanekawa is a kind human being, good at
taking care of people. And it is honestly unfortunate that she is a
determined person as well. She is such a serious person that she
doesn't budge once she has made up her mind. During the spring
break, just because of a little incident that should have been over by
now, even though she didn't know whether we would end up in the
same class or not, she had declared: "I will definitely change you for
the better."

For someone like me who was neither a delinquent nor a problem

child, more of an ornament in class than anything, her declaration
came as a shock. No matter how hard I tried to dissuade her, she
forced me to become the assistant class representative.

That was why today, the 8th of May, the both of us stayed back
after school to plan the Cultural Festival that was to be held in the
middle of June.

"Though it's the Cultural Festival, we're third year students. We

can't afford to do anything big, because we'll be having
examinations soon." said Hanekawa.

As expected of the representative of all class representatives, she

places more importance on examinations than cultural festivals.
"Instead of wasting time on gathering opinions with surveys, how
about we think of some ideas and let the class take a vote on them?"

"It sounds good to me. Democratic."

"As usual, you make it sound so negative. As if you are already

defeated."

Im not defeated. Dont target my weak points.

"Anyway, just for reference, Araragi-kun, what did you do for the
Cultural Festival for the past two years?"

"A Haunted House and a Cafe."

"I see the normal. Too normal. One could even say mundane."

"I guess."

"Mundane might be good."

"Don't say that."

"Ahaha."

"Most of the stalls will be mundane, but is it such a bad idea? Not
only do we have to entertain the guests, we have to keep things
interesting for ourselves.... That reminds me, Senjougahara - she
doesn't participate in Cultural Festivals, does she?"

Not last year - and not the year before that either.

It's not only for Cultural Festivals. Senjougahara probably does not
participate in anything outside normal class time. Sport festivals
were a given, but she does not participate in class outings or camps.
The excuse being that the doctor has forbidden any form of physical
exertion, or something of the sort. Now that I think of it, it's weird.
Physical exercise is understandable, but to exclude any forms of
physical activity -

But, what if -

What if I had been mistaken.

What if Senjougahara had no weight.

Other than normal classes, indeed, in situations where she'll be

surrounded by large numbers of people, such as physical education
classes, there will be an increase in the chance of being touched, and
she most definitely cannot be able to participate.

"Are you very concerned about Senjougahara?"

"Not really."

"Guys prefer weak and sickly girls after all. That's so perverted."
Hanekawa teased.

It was a comparably preferable moment.

"Sickly, huh..."

I suppose you could call her sickly.

But does that count as an illness?

Is it all right to pass that off as an illness?

It's easy to understand why the body would become lighter during
illness, but that was way beyond the level of illness.
From the topmost staircase, almost as if she was dancing, a slim girl
fell. It was a situation where the person who attempted to catch her
would most definitely be injured.

Despite that, there was no impact.

"Shouldn't you know more about Senjougahara than me? After all,
you've been in the same class as Senjougahara for three years
running."

"You could say that - but girls would know more about other girls."

"I wonder..."

A cynical laugh.

"If a girl has problems, she wouldn't talk to guys about it, wouldn't
you agree?

"That's true."

Of course it's true.

"That's why just think of it as a question from the assistant class

rep to the class rep. What kind of a person is Senjougahara?"

Well.

Hanekawa, who had not stopped writing even as she spoke to me

(she wrote and erased and rewrote Haunted House and Caf as
the first items on the list of Item to be presented during Cultural
Festival), stopped and folded her arms.
Senjougahara, well, her family name seems rather dangerous at
first glance, but shes an honor student with no problems. Shes
clever and doesnt avoid cleaning duties.

Ill bet. I already knew that. Im asking about things I dont know.

But Ive only been in the same class with her for a month. Its a
given that there are many things that I dont know. There was
Golden Week, too.

Oh right, Golden Week.

Was there something about Golden Week?

Nothing. Please continue.

Ah Thats right. Senjougahara isnt someone of many words, and

she doesnt seem to have any friends either. Even though Ive tried
to approach her, she gives the feeling of having built a wall about
her

As expected, she sees through everyone.

Of course, I had expected that answer to my question.

That is really difficult, said Hanekawa.

With an ominous right.

It might be because of her illness, I suppose. During middle school,

she was more energetic, and bright.
When you say middle school Hanekawa, you were in the same
middle school as Senjougahara?

Eh? Didnt you ask me because of that? She looked surprised.

We are from the same middle school, Kiyokaze Public Middle
School. Even though we werent in the same class, Senjougahara
was famous.

More than you, you mean, was what I wanted to say, but didnt.
Hanekawa hated being treated like someone famous. Though I
think that she isnt self-conscious enough, she seems to think of
herself as a normal girl whose only redeeming feature is her
diligence. In her opinion, studying is something that anyone can
do.

She was really pretty, and good at sports.

Good at sports

She was the star of track-and-field. She also broke several records, I
think.

Track-and-field

That means.

She wasnt like that in middle school.

Energetic and bright that means, to be direct, its entirely

unimaginable when you look at Senjougahara to be direct; its
entirely unimaginable when you look at Senjougahara right now.

Thats why, I heard so much about her.

Heard?

That she was a really considerate girl. That she doesnt

discriminate and treats everyone equally well, and that she came
from a good family. Her father was one of the top people in a
foreign capital company, she lives in a mansion, and although shes
really rich, shes not snobbish at all. Shes above us, and aiming
even higher.

She sounds like a superwoman.

Well, its probably half-true.

Rumors are rumors.

Of course, thats what they were saying at that time.

At that time.

After we entered high school, I heard that she became ill. Despite
that, I was shocked when we ended up in the same class this year
and I saw her. After all, she wasnt the type to stick in a corner of
the classroom.

It was what she had assumed selfishly, said Hanekawa.

It was definitely a selfish assumption.

People change.

From middle school to high school, its a given that people will
change. I changed, and Hanekawa must also have changed. Thats
why its understandable that Senjougahara had changed. She must
have had her own problems, and maybe she really became ill. That
might be the reason why she had lost her cheerful self. She must
have lost her energy. Anyone would be depressed when theyre
sick. Especially if they had been lively in the past. Thats why, my
conjecture must be correct.

If that had not happened this morning.

Thats what I can say.

But I probably shouldnt say this about Senjougahara.

What?

Compared to the past, shes a lot prettier now.

Her existence is really fragile.

Silence She had hit the bulls-eye.

That.

A fragile existence.

She had no presence.

As if she was a spirit?

Senjougahara Hitagi.

A sickly girl.

A girl with no weight.

An urban legend.

The subject of gossip.

The stuff of rumors.

Half-true, was it.

Ah, I just remembered something.

Eh?

Oshino called me.

Oshino-san? What for?

Something Well, he probably wanted me to help with his work.

I see. Hanekawas expression was unreadable.

The sudden change in topic more like, the conspicuous attempt to

round up the issue, she seems distrustful. Saying that I had to help
with his work was on a spur of the moment. Thats why I dont get
along well with smart people.

She can probably tell what Im thinking.

I stood up, forcibly trying to keep my tone light.

So, I gotta leave like, now. Ill leave the rest to you, Hanekawa?

If you agree to compensate for today, then its all right. There isnt
much left, so Ill let you off for today. You shouldnt keep Oshino-
san waiting.
Hanekawa had said that for my sake.

Seems like using Oshinos name was a good choice. Oshino was a
benefactor to both of us, and we didnt want to appear ungrateful.
Well, of course, I had taken that into account, and it wasnt exactly a
lie.

Then, for the cultural festival item, is it all right if I make the
decision? Though well get the approval from the rest afterwards.

Yeah. Ill leave the rest to you.

Give my best to Oshino-san.

I will.

And I stepped out of the classroom.

003

I stepped out of the classroom, shutting the door with one hand,
and had taken a single step, when, from behind me,

What were you talking to Hanekawa-san about?

A voice asked.

I turned around.

As I turned, I was still unable to ascertain the identity of the person

behind me it was an unfamiliar voice. Though I had heard it
before... Thats right, during class, it was that feeble voice that
always answered I dont know
Dont move.

From those two words alone, I realized that it was Senjougahara.

In the instant that I faced her squarely, I also realized that she had
inserted a cutter-knife into my mouth, as if she had aimed for it, as
if she had cut through space and time.

The blade of the cutter-knife was.

Touching the inside of my left cheek.

Ah, let me correct myself. You may move if you want to, but its
dangerous would be more accurate in this situation.

Though she had given me no allowance to move, it wasnt yet

violence, but on the verge of it the blade was touching the inside
of my cheek.

I stood, like a fool, mouth wide open, quivering, but frozen in place.

Im afraid, I thought.

Not of the cutter-knife.

But of Senjougahara, who, whilst threatening me with a cutter-

knife, stared at me coldly, unmoving. Had she

Had I ever seen her wear such an insecure expression?

Im confident now.
From Senjougaharas eyes, Im confident that, though she didnt cut
me, the side of the cutter-knife touching the inside of my left cheek
was not the back of the blade.

Your curiosity is like that of a cockroach digging into peoples

secrets persistently. Its unbearingly irritating. Youve touched my
nerves, you boring excuse for a bug.

H-hey...

Whats wrong? Is your right cheek feeling lonely? You could have
told me so in the first place.

Senjougahara raised her left hand.

That swiftness of movement, as if she was going to slap me. I braced

myself, but it didnt come. No, that wasnt it.

She was holding a stapler in her left hand.

Before I could ascertain the identity of the object, she had already
slipped it into my mouth. Of course, she didnt put the entire stapler
into my mouth, but held it in a way that suggested that she was
going to staple my right cheek as if she was going to bind
something, she put it into my mouth.

And, loosely, she pressed down.

As if she was going to staple something.

ah

The bigger and heavier end of the staple, that is, the pointed ends of
the staples, the fully loaded side, was inserted into my mouth, and
of course, resulted in my inability to produce speech. With only the
cutter-knife, I hadnt been able to move, but I had been able to speak
but now I didn't even dare to try speaking. I didnt have to think
about it.

First she had me open my mouth with the thin cutter-knife, and
followed up with the stapler the level of premeditation in her plan
was frightening.

Damn, the last time I had things stuck into my mouth was when I
was undergoing treatment for a tooth infection. So that I never had
to repeat that experience, I brushed my teeth every day, I chewed
gum to remove parasites- But now, I was faced with a situation just
as bad... but this time, I didn't have any gum that might somehow
get rid of a stapler. Or a knife.

What a way to trip someone up.

In an instant, I was completely trapped.

In the corridors of a private high school, I was in a situation so

absurd, it was unimaginable that on the other side of the wall,
Hanekawa was deciding the class activity for the Cultural Festival.

Hanekawa...

What do you mean, her family name seems rather dangerous?

She is extremely dangerous.

Its unexpected that Hanekawa misjudged her.

After you ask Hanekawa-san about my life in middle school, do

you intend to ask my form teacher Hoshina-sensei? Or do you
intend to skip the form teacher and go straight to the school doctor
Harukami-sensei?

... I couldnt speak.

I didnt know what Senjougahara thought of the me who couldnt

speak, but she sighed deeply.

What a careless mistake. Even though I had been paying attention

because I was climbing the stairs, that happened. Its one of those
little farts they preach about.

...

I might be a good guy for not commenting about her talk about
farts, which most girls would have been rightly embarrassed about.

I never thought there would be a banana peel on the stairs.

...

My life is in the hands of a girl who slipped on a banana peel. More

importantly, why was there a banana peel on the stairs in a school?

You realize it, dont you? asked Senjougahara, with that insecure
look in her eyes.

She must be the daughter of some rich family.

Thats right. I have no weight.

Weightless.
Well, even though I said that, its impossible for me to have no
weight. From my height and body structure, my expected weight
should be in the range of the forties.

Shes probably fifty kilograms.

My left cheek was forcefully stretched outwards and pressure put

on my right cheek.

...!

I wont forgive any weird imaginations of yours. You must have

imagined me nude, didnt you?

She was entirely off the mark, but the result was just as sharp.

I must be in the later range of the forties, she asserted. She stood
her ground.

But my weight at this moment is five kilograms.

Five kilograms.

It wasnt very different from a newborn baby.

An image of a five kilogram dumbbell came to mind, and it wasnt

anywhere close to zero. But for five kilograms to be spread out in
the volume of a human being, the density to her, it must feel as if
she has no weight.

It would be easy to catch her as she fell.

Well, even though the scales say that Im five kilograms, I dont
feel it. I dont feel any different from when I was in the later range
of the forties.

Does that

Does that mean that gravity doesn't work on her? Not weight, but
volume since humans are made up of mostly water, specific
gravity, assuming density is one whole put simply, Senjougahara
is only one-tenth of that density.

If the density of the bones is one-tenth of the actual weight, shed

suffer from osteoporosis before long. Her organs and brains would
not be able to work properly.

Thats why, it's completely impossible.

Its not about the numbers.

If she was as light as this, she would be dead.

I know what youre thinking about.

...

To keep staring at my breasts, youre disgusting.

...!

I swear I wasnt staring!

Seems like Senjougahara is a rather self-conscious girl. Its not

unexpected, given her looks and beauty I just wish that
Senjougahara had even a thousandth of Hanekawas virtues.
Thats why I hate shallow people.

It doesnt seem possible to clear the misunderstanding between us

but more important, I was of the opinion that Senjougahara wasn't
really sick, but that it was only a faade. With a weight of fifty
kilograms, shes neither sick nor ill. If you say shes strong, she must
be an alien from a planet with ten times the gravity of that on Earth,
and must be pretty good at sports. Especially since she was in the
track-and-field. Though she doesnt seem suited to fighting

It happened after I graduated from middle school, and before I

entered high school, said Senjougahara. In that odd period when I
was neither a middle schooler nor a high schooler, even though it
wasnt even spring break, I became like this.

...

I met - a crab.

C-crab?

Did she say crab? Crab as in the crab that you eat in winter?

With a shell and ten legs an arthropod?

It stole my weight.

...

Well, you dont really have to understand. Itll be problematic for

me if you continue asking questions, so Im telling you now.
Araragi-kun. Araragi-kun, hey, Araragi-kun.

Senjougahara called my name, repeatedly.

I dont have weight I dont have mass. Nothing thats remotely
related to weight. Its not problematic for me at all. Its just like in
Yousukes Mysterious World. Do you like Takahashi Shousuke?

...

The only person in this school who knows of this is Harukami-

sensei, the school doctor. As of this moment, only Harukami-sensei.
Not the principal Yoshiki-sensei, not the senior teacher Shima-
sensei, not the level headed Irinaka-sensei. Only Harukami-sensei
and you, Araragi-kun.

...

So now, what should I do so that you will keep quiet about my

secret? For my sake, what should I do? Other than tearing apart
your mouth so that you cant speak, what should I do so that you
will swear to keep your mouth shut?

Cutter-knife.

Stapler.

Is she all right? What a forceful approach to her classmate. Is it all

right for someone like her to exist? When I think about the fact that
Id been sitting in the same room, beside such a scary human being
for more than two years, shivers run down my spine.

According to the doctors at the hospital, the reason is unknown

or rather, there should be no reason. After doing what they wanted
with my body, what an insulting answer. That it must have been
like that from the beginning, that it was the only thing they could
say, said Senjougahara self-deprecatingly.
Dont you think that its absurd? Even though I was a perfectly
normal, perfectly cute girl until middle school.

...

Lets ignore the fact that she called herself cute.

She really had been going to the hospital.

Tardiness, leaving early, absences.

And the school doctor.

I wonder what he thought about it.

Like me, just like me, only not in the short space of the two weeks of
spring break, but always.

What had she given up on?

What had she forsaken?

Enough time had passed.

Are you going to pity me? How kind of you.

As if she had seen into my thoughts, she spoke insultingly. As if

everything was filthy.

But I dont want your pity.

...
What I want is your silence and your indifference. Do you think
youre capable of that? You want to treasure your unblemished
cheeks, dont you?

Senjougahara smiled.

Araragi-kun, if you can promise me silence and indifference, nod

twice. I will treat any other action as an offensive move and will
attack accordingly.

What a one-sided speech.

Left with no choice, I nodded twice.

I see.

Senjougahara seemed relieved by my choice of action. Even though

I had been left with no choice, even though she had been the one
bargaining, even though her request was one that I could not deny
she seemed relieved by the fact that I had accepted it.

Thank you. As she said that, she removed her cutter-knife from
my mouth, not carefully, but excruciatingly, slowly. She put away
the cutter-knife.

Next was the stapler-

Urgh!?

Snap.

Unbelievable.

Senjougahara closed the stapler forcefully.

And before I could respond to the pain, she removed the stapler.

I collapsed onto the floor.

Clutching the side of my mouth in pain.

Oouch

You wont scream. How admirable, said Senjougahara, looking

down with an uncaring face.

Ill let you off with this. If you hate your own incompetence, you
may keep your side of the bargain without an ounce of sincerity.

...Y-you

Snap.

As I was about to say something, Senjougahara pressed down on

the stapler, as if she was going to bind something together.

The staple fell before my very eyes.

Naturally, I shivered.

A conditioned reflex.

With just one attempt she created a conditioned reflex.

All right then, Araragi-kun, from tomorrow onwards, please make

sure to ignore me. Im depending on you.

After saying that, without waiting for my response, she went down
the stairs. Before I could get up from my crouch, she had turned the
corner and disappeared from sight.
Ah, what a devil-like woman.

Our brains are definitely constructed differently.

Even though all of that had happened, despite that, in some part of
my brain, I'd thought she wouldn't do it. The fact that she chose the
stapler instead of the cutter-knife should give me hope.

I stroked my cheek, not to ease the pain, but to ascertain its state.

...

All right.

She hadnt pierced through.

And then, I inserted my finger into my mouth. My left finger,

because it was my right cheek. I felt my way in.

The pain was not gone, nor was it so weak that I couldnt find the
staple but there was only one of it. As expected, it was only meant
as a threat, and it could still be considered a peaceful attempt
though truthfully, I had been hoping for that.

Oh well.

The fact that it hadnt pierced through my cheek meant that the
staple had not bent it was still in its original shape, with the sharp
ends pointed outwards. That meant that she had not used her full
force.

With my thumb and forefinger, I pulled it out in one go.

The sharp pain was mixed with the iron taste of blood.
Blood was spurting out, it seems.

Ow...

Its all right.

If its only this, Ill be fine.

As I licked the two holes on the inside of my cheek, I folded the

ends of the staple and slipped it into the pocket of my jacket. I
picked up the staple that Senjougahara dropped and repeated the
action. Itll be dangerous if someone who wasnt wearing shoes
stepped on it. I couldnt help but treat these staples as dangerous
objects like Magnum bullets.

Eh? Why are you still here, Araragi-kun? said Hanekawa as she
stepped out of the classroom.

It seemed like shed finished the papers.

That took quite a bit of time.

Or should I say, nice timing.

Shouldnt you hurry to Oshino-sans place? asked Hanekawa.

It was like she hasn't realized anything.

She had been on the other side of the wall. It was a very thin wall.
Despite that, without letting Hanekawa notice anything, she
managed to pose such a threat. Senjougahara Hitagi is truly
someone to be feared.

Hanekawa Do you like bananas?

Eh? Well, I dont hate them. They're nutritious, and if I had to
decide, I guess I do like them.

No matter how much you like them, dont eat them in school!

W-what?

Well, its fine if you eat them in school, but if you leave the peel on
the staircase, Ill never forgive you!

What on earth are you talking about, Araragi-kun!? said

Hanekawa, looking exasperated.

Thats to be expected.

More importantly, Araragi-kun, what about Oshino-san

Im heading there now, I said.

As I said that, I left Hanekawa and dashed off. Ah, hey, Araragi-
kun! You shouldnt run in the corridors! I'll tell the teacher! I heard
Hanekawa shout behind me, but I ignored her.

I ran.

In any case, I ran.

Turning the corner, the staircase.

This is the fourth floor.

She cant be too far away.

Hop, step, jump, I flew down the stairs, landing as softly as if I was
dancing.
The shock of the impact on my feet.

The impact of gravity.

Even this kind of impact

Senjougahara couldnt feel it.

No weight.

No mass.

Her doubtful footsteps.

A crab.

She had talked about a crab.

This way nope, this way.

She wouldnt try to hide. She wouldnt think that I would chase
after her, so she should be heading straight for the school gate. She
has no club activities, so she must be one of those who head straight
home after school. Even if she did have something on, it wont be
starting at this time. Once I had come to that conclusion, I went
down the staircase, past the third and second floors without
hesitation. Leaping down.

And from the second floor to the first.

Senjougahara was there.

From the noise I was making, she must have already known that I
was coming, and even though I was approaching her from the back,
she was already turning around to face me.
With those cold eyes.

Astounding, she said.

No, I should truly be flabbergasted. You are the first to rebound so

quickly after that, Araragi-kun.

The first

That meant that there had been others.

Though she made so much fuss about it.

But, it was true, once I thought about it, that her secret of having
no weight was one that would be exposed upon contact. It was
realistically speaking, impossible.

Come to think of it, she had said as of this moment.

She might really be the devil.

In any case, I had not thought you would be able to recover from
the pain in your cheek. Normally, you wouldnt have been able to
move from that spot.

The voice of experience.

Too scary.

All right, I get it. I understand now, Araragi-kun. Your attitude of

an eye for an eye doesnt sit well with me. I hope youre prepared
for this, said Senjougahara, as she stretched her hands out by her
side.

Lets fight.
Starting with pen knives and staplers, all sorts of stationeries
appeared in those hands. Sharpened HB pencils, compass, multi-
coloured ballpens, mechanical pencils, superglue, rubber bands,
paper clips, gachuck(ie. paper shark) , marker pens, safety pins,
fountain pens, correction fluid, scissors, cellophane tapes, sewing
kits, isosceles triangle rulers, thirty-centimetre rulers, protractors,
glue, carving tools, drawing tools, paper weights, ink pots.

I got the feeling that I would be persecuted in the future for no other
reason than having been in the same class as this person.

Personally, I felt that the instant adhesive was the most dangerous.

youre mistaken. Im not here to fight.

You arent? She sounded disappointed.

But she didnt relax her arms.

The assorted weaponry glistened.

Then, what business do you have with me?

This is just a possibility, but, I said, I might be able to help you.

Help me? I could tell from her tone that she was laughing at me.

No, she might be infuriated.

Dont joke. Im sure I told you that I detest people who pity me.
What do you think you are capable of? Itll be sufficient if you shut
your mouth and stay away.


Ill treat your kindness as an act of hostility, she said, as she took
a step towards me.

Her lack of hesitation was a fact that I knew only too well, from the
previous skirmish. One that I did not want to know about.

Thats why.

Thats why, without saying anything, I peeled back my lips with a

finger and showed her my cheek.

With my right finger, and showed her my right cheek.

Exposing the inside of my cheek.

Eh?

As expected, Senjougahara was shocked. With a clatter, the

weapons in her hands fell onto the floor.

You how is that she could not complete her question.

Thats right.

There was not even the smell of blood.

The wound that Senjougahara had made with her stapler had
already healed without a trace.
 004

It all happened during spring break.

I was attacked by a vampire.

In a time with mobile phones and cars, and when it was normal to
travel overseas for a school trip... Its rather embarrassing to say
this, but I was attacked by a vampire.

She was a breathtaking beauty.

A beautiful monster.

A very beautiful monster.

Its usually hidden under the collar of my school jacket, but on the
nape of my neck, her bite marks remain. Before it gets warm, Im
thinking of letting my hair grow to cover it up, but more
importantly - there are probably lots of stories where when one is
attacked by a vampire, people like vampire hunters, specialists in
killing vampires, or a special division of the Christian Church, or a
group of vampires who hunt their own kind will appear to save
you- but, in my case, I was saved by a passing stranger.

Because of that, I was able to return to being a human being Im

fine with sunlight, crosses and garlic but there were side-effects;
my physical abilities had improved. Though I say that, I don't mean
my physical abilities, but my metabolism has increased; my ability
to heal myself. I dont know what would have happened if my
cheek had been ripped apart by that cutter-knife, but it takes less
than thirty seconds to heal the wound made by the staple.
Compared to other living creatures, that's pretty fast.
Oshino Oshino-san?

Thats right. Oshino Meme.

Oshino Meme, you say it certainly sounds like a moe name.

Don't get your expectations too high. Hes a thirty-plus year old
man.

I see. But he must have been a moe character when he was young.

Dont judge real people like that. More importantly, you

understand what "moe" and "character" are?

Its common knowledge, said Senjougahara, looking composed.

They call my character tsundere, dont they?

I think they call your character a tsundra.

Small talk.

From Naoetsu High, where Hanekawa, Senjougahara and I go to, it

takes about twenty minutes to get to a cram school that was located
outside the residential area.

Was located.

A few years ago, because of the sudden influx of famous cram

schools, this particular school had closed down due to financial
problems. By the time I came to know about this four-floored
building, it had already fallen into an awe-inspiring state of
disrepair, so what I know of its history is only from rumors.
Dangerous.

Private property.

Access prohibited.

Though the building was surrounded by a safety fence and a mess

of poster boards, holes in the fence were aplenty, so entry and exit
was both possible and easy.

And in the midst of that rubble was where Oshino lived.

Where he decided to make his home.

Including spring break, it had been about a month.

In any case, my butt hurts. And there are wrinkles on my skirt.

Its not my fault.

Stop making excuses. Ill chop it to pieces.

Chop what to pieces!?

Shouldnt you be nicer to me because its my first time riding a

bicycle with someone else?

Didnt you propose that kindness is an action of hostility?

Her words and actions contradict each other.

All right then, what should we do?

Well. As an example, how about lending me your bag as a

cushion?
Dont you care about others?

Dont address me so casually. I said it was an example, didnt I?

What did I answer to that?

An excellent question.

Tsk. Compared to you, Mary Antoinette was probably more

humble and modest.

Shes my pupil.

What happened to the years between you two!?

Can you please stop interrupting me? Youve been overly friendly.
If others didnt know better, theyd think that we were classmates.

But we are!

To what extent is she going to deny our relationship?

It just seems too much to me.

Geez Its going to take quite a bit of patience to deal with

someone like you, isnt it

Araragi-kun, that sentence makes it sound as if its my character,

and not yours, thats problematic, you know? said Senjougahara.

More importantly, wheres your bag? Youre empty-handed, arent

you? Dont you have one?

That reminds me, I've never seen Senjougahara carrying anything.

The information in the textbooks is already in my head. Thats why
I leave everything in the school locker. If I have all my stationery
with me, I dont need a bag. Since I dont need a change of clothes
for physical education classes either.

I see.

If I dont have my hands free, I wont be able to fight when the

time comes.

Her whole body is a weapon.

A human weapon.

Though Im against leaving sanitary items in school, thats about

the only thing that bothers me. I cant borrow from others, since I
dont have friends.

Dont say that so casually.

Whats wrong? Since it is for sanitary purposes, theres nothing to

be embarrassed about. Hiding it would be more disgusting, dont
you think?

I think hiding it is also rather problematic.

Well, its up to the individual.

Its not my place to comment on it.

More importantly, what had caught my attention was the way she
had dismissed her lack of friends.
Oh, that reminds me.

Not that I really cared about it, but the previous issue about skirts
had brought to my attention the fact that Senjougahara was a girl
after all and wouldnt want to dirty her clothes. Because of that, I
made some effort to search for a bigger entrance and upon reaching
it, I turned to her.

Ill hold your 'stationery'.

What?

Ill hold them for you, so take them out.

What did you say?

She looked as if I had made an unreasonable request to her. As if

there was something wrong with my head.

Though Oshino is kind of a weird guy, hes my saviour.

Besides.

Hes also Hanekawas saviour.

I wont let him meet someone dangerous, so Ill hold onto your
stationery.

I didnt expect you to say that after wed arrived. Senjougahara

glared at me. You tricked me, didnt you?

Do you have to put it that way?

Senjougahara did not say anything, but her expression was a
mixture of serious contemplation and conflict. She stared at a point
near her feet, but turned her head to glare at me several times.

I thought that we might leave without going inside, but after a

while, Senjougahara said I understand as if she had made up her
mind.

Hold out your hands.

With that, the stationeries fell from her as if they were a thousand
petals, as if it was a magic show and she was pulling off a trick. The
stationery she had threatened me with back in the corridor had
barely been the tip of the iceberg. Her pockets might be four
dimensional. It might be a twenty-second century technology. Even
though I had said I would hold them for her, the amount made me
worry if they would fit in my bag.

The government must be neglecting public safety allowing someone

like her to be walking freely about in public.

Dont misunderstand. It doesnt mean that I trust you now, said

Senjougahara, when she had finished passing me all her
stationeries.

What do you mean, trust

If youre thinking of leading me on, bringing me to such an

isolated ruin, thinking to pay me back for the stapler wound, then
youre making a huge mistake.

Well, I think its a mistake too.

Listen carefully. If I don't call them every minute, five thousand of
my minions would go after your family.

Itll be fine.

Are you saying that itll only take a minute?!

Do you take me for some boxer?

More importantly, how dare you threaten my family.

How outrageous.

Five thousand people, what a huge lie.

A daring lie for someone who doesnt even have friends.

You have two younger sisters in middle school, dont you?

She knows about my family.

Even if its a lie, thats not a joke.

Anyway, I had shown her my invincibility against injuries and it

seems like she doesnt trust me at all because of that. In view of the
fact that Oshino had said that trust was important, this was not a
good situation.

Well, it cant be helped.

From now on, its Senjougaharas personal problem.

I'm only the guide.

Past the wire netting, we entered the area and into the building.
Even though it was only evening, it was pretty dim. Because the
building had been left in disrepair for so long, the footing was bad,
and if one wasnt careful one would stumble.

It was then that I realized.

If an empty can fell, it would be only an empty can, but to

Senjougahara, it would be an empty can with ten times its normal
weight.

If we think in relative terms...

Ten times the gravity, one-tenth of gravity, is a problem that, unlike

in manga, cannot be clearly defined. The simplistic thinking that
light weight equals high physical ability is wrong. Moreover, this is
an unfamiliar place for her. It cant be helped that Senjougahara is
like a wild animal on guard.

Even if she is ten times faster, her strength is only one-tenth of what
it was.

I understand why she was so reluctant to let go of the stationeries.

Also, why she doesnt carry a bag.

Its this way.

I stretched out my hand towards Senjougahara, who had stopped at

the entrance, grabbing her wrist, and showing her the way.
Senjougahara looked bewildered by my sudden movement, and
muttered what, but she followed me closely.

Dont even think that Ill thank you.

I get it.

Instead, you should be thanking me.

I dont get that.

After all, I purposely planned for that wound to be on the inside of

your cheek so it wouldn't show.

...

No matter how you think about it, that sounds like something an
attacker would say: so it doesn't stand out so much, Ill punch you
in the stomach rather than the face.

In any case, if you had pierced through my cheek, it would have

still stood out.

But you had thick skin to begin with, so I somehow concluded that
it would be fine.

I cant be happy about that. And whats with that somehow?

My intuition is about ten percent accurate.

Thats low.

Well~ said Senjougahara, keeping her distance from me.

But it seems like it was an unnecessary precaution after all.

...seems like it.

Would it hurt if I said immortality is convenient?

Senjougaharas question.

I answered. Not anymore.

Had it been during spring break.

If someone had said that to me... I would have died. It might have
been a fatal wound.

If you say its handy, it is. If you say that its not handy, it isnt.
Thats all there is to it.

You mean its neither, dont you? Thats quite difficult to

comprehend. Senjougahara shrugged.

Its similar to whether a possible danger is dangerous or not.

The ourai in that possible danger is all right, isnt it? (T/N:
"possible danger" is pronounced as "ou rai ki ken", in which "ou rai"
sounds like "all right".)

Is it?

Anyways, Im no longer immortal. Im just a human with faster

healing than normal, thats all.

Hmm. I see, said Senjougahara in a bored tone.

Even though I was intending to try out all sorts of things. How
disappointing.

Seems like you had made all sorts of weird plans without
informing me

How insulting. I had only planned to ___ to ___ you, thats all.
Whats ___!?

I just wanted to try out this and that.

Explain the italicized parts!

Oshino was usually on the fourth floor.

There was an elevator, but as expected, it wasnt working.

Therefore, the only options were to break into the ceiling of the
elevator and follow the wires to the fourth floor, or to take the
stairs. No matter how one thought about it, the second option was
better.

Holding Senjougaharas hand, we climbed the stairs.

Araragi-kun. I have one last thing to say.

What is it?

Though I may look like this, under my clothes, my body is

unexpectedly not worth the jail time.

...

Senjougahara Hitagi seems to be quite suspicious of me.

Cant you understand a roundabout expression? Then Ill say it

directly. If you reveal your base nature and decide to strip yourself
and try to rape me, no matter what happens, Ill definitely get my
revenge on you like they do in BL.

...

She has zero prudence and no sense of shame.

What a terrifying person.

It seems to me, not just from what you say, but from a general
point of view, you seem to be overly self-conscious, as if you think
of yourself as a victim?

How unpleasant. There are things you can say and things you
cant?

Youre fully aware of that!?

Still, that Oshino person of yours sure lives in a rundown building,

doesnt he?

Ah... Hes quite an eccentric person.

I still find it difficult to answer Senjougaharas questions.

Shouldnt we have contacted him beforehand- though its a bit late

saying that now- since were the ones asking him for a favor?

Its surprising to hear something like common sense from you, but
unfortunately, he doesnt have a mobile phone.

It seems like hes not one to reveal his true character. He sounds
rather dubious. What does he do for a living?

I dont really know the details, but hes an expert in situations like
ours.

Hmm.

Though my explanation wasn't much of an explanation,

Senjougahara did not press the issue. She may be thinking that
shed be meeting him anyway, that there wouldnt be any point in
asking. Both seemed to be the correct interpretation.

Ah, Araragi-kun, youre wearing your watch on your right wrist,

arent you?

Hmm? Ah, yeah.

Are you warped?

Cant you just ask if Im left-handed!

I see. So, are you?

Shes the one whos warped.

Fourth floor.

Since it was originally a cram school, the rooms were divided into
three classrooms for each of the classrooms, the doors were
broken and had blended into the corridors. I peeked into the first
classroom, looking for Oshino,

There you are, Araragi-kun. Ive been waiting for you.

Oshino Meme was there.

He was sitting cross-legged on a makeshift bed created from several

worn-out tables that had been stacked and tied together with plastic
strings, facing them.

As if he had known that I was coming. As usual he can see

through everything.
And, Senjougahara was clearly, repulsed. Even though I had told
her about Oshino, Oshinos dirty state must be quite shocking to a
modern high school girls sense of fashion. Anyone who lived in
such a dump would certainly become quite ragged, but even a guy
like me would say that Oshino is far from clean. One could only say
that he wasnt clean, if one wanted to be truthful. And more
important than that, the psychedelic Hawaiian shirt was the last
straw.

It always comes as kind of a shock that this person is my saviour...

He doesnt seem anything like Hanekawa.

Ooh. I see that youve brought a different girl today. I never see
you with the same girl twice, do I? Really, I couldnt be happier for
you.

Cut that out, dont make me sound like that kind of character.

Hmm arent you?

Oshino was staring at Senjougahara with a far-sighted look.

As if he was staring at something behind her.

Nice to meet you, ojou-chan. Im Oshino.

Nice to meet you. Im Senjougahara Hitagi.

In any case, the self-introductions were done.

At least she hadnt tried to insert any insults. Looks like she has
some respect for the older generation.
Im Araragi-kuns classmate, he was the one who told me about
you.

Ah I see, said Oshino in a meaningful tone of voice.

Casting his eyes downwards, he took out a cigarette and held it

between his lips, without lighting it. The windows, which were
already unable to function as windows, contained only shards of
glass, and Oshino seemed to be pointing at the far distance.

And after a long silence, he turned towards me.

Do you like girls with straight bangs, Araragi-kun?

As I said, dont make me sound like that kind of character. Only

lolicons like straight bangs. Dont mix me into your generation
where adolescence was when Full House was on.

Of course, laughed Oshino.

At that, Senjougahara frowned.

She seemed to have been insulted by the term loli.

Well I guess itll be better if you ask her directly, but anyways,
Oshino two years ago, she

Dont talk about me so informally, said Senjougahara resolutely.

Then how do you want me to call you?

Senjougahara-sama.

Is she sane?

Sen-jou-ga-ha-ra-sa-ma. Long, drawn-out, and sarcastic.

I dont like the way you pronounced that. Say it properly.

Senjougahara-chan.

She jabbed her fingers into my eyes.

Ill go blind!

Thats because you were rude.

Whats with that equivalent exchange!?

My abusive words are filled with forty grams of copper, twenty

five grams of zinc, fifteen grams of nickel, five grams of
embarrassment and ninety seven kilograms of spite.

Thats mostly spite, isnt it!

By the way, the bit about embarrassment was a joke.

You just took out the most important ingredient!

You sure are noisy. If you dont keep it down, Im going to give
you the nickname menstrual pain.

That sounds like a suicide monster!

Whats your problem? Its just as the word suggests, so theres

nothing to be embarrassed about.

That and being spiteful are different issues!

Senjougahara seemed satisfied with that and turned to face Oshino.

I'd like to inquire about something. Rather than just Oshino, her
tone of voice suggested that she was addressing both Oshino and
me, as she pointed to the corner of the classroom.

In that corner, there was a young girl young enough that she
wouldn't have entered high school yet - hugging her knees. She
looked about eight years old, wearing an old pilot helmet and
goggles, with white skin and blonde hair, hugging her knees in the
corner.

What on earth is that child?

What, rather than "who", she asks, which meant that

Senjougahara was perceptive. Anyways, even if it had not been
Senjougahara, most perceptive people would have noticed that
there was something different about the girl, especially since she
stared at Oshino with an insecure look.

Ah, you dont have to worry about her, I explained, before

Oshino could say anything.

Shes just sitting there, she wont do anything so itll be fine. She
has neither a shadow nor a shape. A child without a name, without
existence.

Oh, no, no, Araragi-kun, interrupted Oshino. Youre right that

she has neither shadow, shape nor existence, but I gave her a name
yesterday. Since she was pretty useful during Golden Week, and it
would be inconvenient if she doesn't have a name. Also, as long as
she doesnt have a name, shell remain an atrocity.

Hmm a name. What did you name her?

Oshino Shinobu.

Shinobu hmm.

A truly Japanese name.

Though it doesnt really matter in this case.

A heart under a blade. A good name, fitting for her, dont you
think? I gave her my family name. It happens that the Kanji
character for Shinobu is also part of my name. Serving two
purposes and having threefold meaning. Quite a tasteful name,
dont you think? I quite like it myself.

Does it really matter?

More like, it doesnt matter to me.

I considered quite a few, and narrowed it down to Oshino Shinobu

or Oshino Oshino, but I picked the one that sounded better instead
of the one that played with phonetics. I think Ms. Class
Representative would be quite happy with the choice of the Kanji
too.

Its fine.

I really dont care.

Though Oshino is out of the question.

Like I said.

In a tone of voice that suggested that she had had quite enough of
this inscrutable talk, Senjougara asked,
What on earth is that child?

Like I said nothing.

The ruins of a vampire.

The hollow remains of a beautiful monster.

No matter what I said, it couldnt be helped, could it? Anyways, it

wasnt related to Senjougahara, but my own problem. As long as I
live, its a burden that I will have to carry.

Nothing, you say. Fine.

...

What an indifferent woman.

My paternal grandmother often said that it doesnt matter if I was

indifferent, as long as I was brought up to be wakumashiku, its
fine.

Whats wakumashiku? (ie. yakumashiku = insignificant)

She mispronounced it.

Just like pronouncing oosodokkusu(orthodox) as oodosokkusu.

More importantly.

Senjougahara shifted her gaze from the ex-vampire, a girl with

white skin and blonde hair, aka Oshino Shinobu, to Oshino Meme.

I heard that you could help me.

Me? Thats impossible, said Oshino in a joking tone of voice.

Only you can help yourself, ojou-chan.

...

Wow.

Senjougaharas eyes narrowed to half their normal size.

Shes plainly suspicious.

Till today, there have been five people whod told me those exact
words. They were all conmen. Are you one of them, Oshino-san?

Hahhaa. Ojou-chan, you sure are energetic. Did something good

happen to you?

Why on earth are you using such provocative words? There are
those on whom those words will work, like Hanekawa, but it wont
work on Senjougahara.

Shes the type who'd step up to the challenge.

All right, all right.

I reluctantly stepped in to mediate.

I forcefully inserted myself between them.

Dont interrupt. Ill kill you."

...

Right now, this woman, rather casually, talked about killing me.
Why am I always in the line of fire?

Shes like a bomb.

Good god, I dont have the words to describe her.

Well, in any case, said Oshino rather offhandedly, in contrast to

the tense situation.

If you dont tell me about your situation, we wont be able to get

anything done. Im not very good at reading peoples minds. If you
dont talk, I wont be able to get at the heart of the problem. Ill keep
your secret for you, so dont worry.

...

Ah. Well. Ill explain a bit first

Its okay, Araragi-kun.

Senjougahara interrupted me again.

Ill do it myself.

Senjougahara.

I can do it myself, she said.

005

Two hours later.

I was at Senjougahara's apartment, leaving Oshino and Shinobu
behind in the abandoned cram school.

Senjougahara's home.

Tamikura-sou, it was called.

A two-story wooden apartment building, built thirty years ago. Tin

mailboxes by the door. A shower and flush toilet included,
grudgingly, in each apartment. One six-mat room with a tiny sink.
Twenty minutes walk to the nearest bus stop. Rent ran from thirty
to forty thousand, depending on the room (including upkeep,
utilities, and neighborhood association fees.)

Not exactly what Hanekawa had led me to believe.

It must have shown on my face. Without me even asking,

Senjougahara said, flatly, "My mother joined a cult."

Like that was an excuse.

She was clearly glossing over a lot.

"Not only did she hand over all our money to them, she ran up
huge debts donating to them. Your house goeth before a fall."

"A cult?"

One of those dangerous new age 'religions.'

They all led to the same results.

"They finally agreed to divorce at the end of last year. My father got
me, and we live here. At least, I do...but all the debt is in my father's
name, so he's working night and day to pay it off, and almost never
makes it home. I pretty much live here alone. With all the freedom
that entails."

Sounded great.

"But the official address on the school rolls is the old one, still.
Hanekawa-san wouldn't have known."

Um...

Shouldn't you change it?

"I prefer potential enemies not know where I live."

"Everyone's an enemy, hunh?"

Usually, that would sound like an exaggeration. But with a secret

you were desperate to protect, it may well have been a reasonable
level of caution.

"Senjougahara. When your mother joined this cult...was she trying

to help you?"

"What an awful question," she laughed. "I don't know. Maybe not."

An awful answer.

Probably what I get for asking.

It had been an awful question. The thought alone made my stomach

churn. I should not have asked, and because I did ask, Senjougahara
was absolutely right to unleash the full power of her tongue.
Of course her family would have noticed their daughter no longer
weighed anything. Especially her mother. Family wasn't like school,
where we each owned a little space around our desks. If something
terrible happened to your only daughter, you'd notice at once. And
when the doctors had no idea how to help, and the tests went on
and on, no one could blame her mother for seeking help in other
places.

No, perhaps we could blame her.

It wasn't my place to say.

I shouldn't talk like I understood anything.

At any rate.

At any rate, there I was in Senjougahara's house, Tamikura-sou

room 201, sitting on a cushion staring at the steam rising off the tea
she'd given me.

Given her personality, I had assumed she'd make me wait outside,

but she waved me inside, and even made tea. This came as
something of a shock.

"I'm going to torture you."

"Um..."

"I meant welcome you."

"Right..."

"No, maybe I did mean torture."

"I much preferred welcome! No other option is acceptable! Not
everyone can correct their own mistakes! Well done, Senjougahara-
san!"

And that's all the conversation we really had. I wound up just

sitting there, flustered. I couldn't very well admit I felt awkward
entering the house of a girl I'd just met. All I could do was stare at
my tea.

Senjougahara was taking a shower.

Cleansing her body, purifying herself.

Oshino had told her to wash her body in cold water, and then
change clothes -- they didn't need to be new or anything, just clean.

And I had accompanied her back. She'd ridden my bike from school
to Oshino's, so there was that, but Oshino had also left a few other
instructions.

I looked around the room. It was really bare bones -- hard to believe
a teenage girl lived here. I leaned back against the chest of drawers
behind me.

Reflecting on Oshino's diagnosis.

When Senjougahara finished telling him of her condition, Oshino

nodded, stared at the ceiling for a long moment, and finally said, "A
Crab of Burden."

"And that is?" Senjougahara pressed.

"Folk legend in the mountains of Kyushu. Some places call it a Crab

of Burden, some places a Heavy Crab, or a Deadweight Crab, some
places even call it a God instead. Kami and Kani don't sound that
different, after all. The details of it vary, but the one thing they all
have in common is that they take away people's weight. People that
meet them -- that meet them the wrong way -- it's like they don't
exist the same way they used to."

"It changes the way you exist?"

You became fragile.

Delicate.

And more beautiful.

"In some cases, people cease to exist at all. If you go higher up the
country there's something called the Rock of Burden, but I don't
think they're related. One's a rock and one's a crab."

"So...is it really a crab?"

"You are dumb, Araragi-kun," Oshino sounded completely

disgusted with me. "We're talking Miyazaki Prefecture...maybe
Oita, too. They don't even have crabs. It's just a story. And things
they don't come across often are easier to make shit up about. Just
like it's easier to get worked up about delusions and gossip."

"Are crabs even all that Japanese?"

"You may have eaten the American kind. But you should read up
on your old Japanese stories, Araragi-kun. You never heard The
Crab and the Monkey? Russia has a famous story about a crab, and
China has some too. Japan is no exception."
"Oh, right. I've heard that story. Or I've heard of it. But...why
Miyazaki?"

"Who was it who got attacked by a vampire in a dozy country

town? The place doesn't really matter. Only the conditions that were
born there."

Although even Oshino admitted the local climate played a factor.

"Didn't have to be a crab, really. Could've been a rabbit. Some

stories even have it as a beautiful woman -- not like Shinobu-chan
or anything, but the stories exist."

"Hunh...like the patterns on the moon."

Were we calling her Shinobu-chan already?

Suddenly I felt sorry for her.

Once a legendary vampire...

Now addressed as -chan.

"But if you say you met a crab, then let's assume it was a crab. Most
common type, after all."

"But what is it?" Senjougahara growled. "I don't give a crap what the
thing is named."

"But you do. The name is everything. Like I just told Araragi-kun,
they don't have crabs in the mountains of Kyushu. They have some
up North, but not a lot of them made their way down to Kyushu."

"They have freshwater ones."

"Maybe so, but that's not the point."

"Then what is the point?"

"That it didn't used to be crabs. It used to be gods -- kami, not kani.

The god of burden evolved into a crab. I mean, this is just my
personal theory. Most people would assume it went the other way
around. Or at least insist they were both around from the
beginning."

"Either way, I've never heard of them."

"Of course you have," Oshino said. "You met one."

That silenced her.

"And it's still with you."

"Can you...see it?"

"I can't see anything," Oshino said, chuckling merrily. An

inappropriately pleasant laugh, that clearly rubbed Senjougahara
the wrong way.

It had a similar effect on me.

He was clearly mocking her.

"Isn't that your job?"

"Is it? The whole point of chimi-moryo is that no one can see them.
Can't see them, can't touch them. That's only normal."

"Normal. But..."
"Ghosts ain't got legs, vampires don't have reflections, but that's not
the point, is it? Things like that can't be pinned down. And tell me
this, girl -- if no one can see them, and no one can touch them...do
they exist?"

"Do they...you just said they did!"

"I did. But nobody can see them and nobody can touch them, then
scientifically speaking, they don't exist. Doesn't matter if they're real
or not."

That was his point.

Senjougahara did not seem satisfied.

It was sound logic, but not something she could just accept.

Not in her position.

"Well, girl, you may have bad luck, but you're on the lucky side of
bad luck. Araragi-kun here didn't just meet his; he was attacked.
And attacked by a vampire. Is there anything more embarrassing
for modern man?"

Drop it.

Drop it now.

"You're much better off than he was."

"Why?"
"Because gods are everywhere. They're everywhere, and nowhere. It
was with you before your present condition arrived...but you could
also say it wasn't."

"Is that some sort of Zen?"

"Shinto. Shugendo, specifically," Oshino said. "You need to

understand, girl. You didn't wind up like this because of something
else. You just changed your point of view."

She was always like that.

Almost exactly what the doctors said, as they threw in the towel.

"My point of view? What are you trying to say?"

"I'm saying, you need to stop acting like a victim, girl," Oshino
snarled, sudden heat behind his words.

He'd been like this with me.

And like this with Hanekawa.

I was worried about how Senjougahara would react, but she didn't
say a word.

She just accepted it.

This seemed to impress him a little. "Well done. Guess you aren't
just a selfish little girl after all."

"What made you think I was?"

"Most people who encounter Crabs of Burden are. Not the kind of
thing you can meet just by wanting to, and not the kind of harmful
god. Not like vampires."

They don't harm?

They don't harm you...so they don't attack?

"They don't possess you. They just exist. Unless you want a change,
then nothing will change. Now, I'm not wanting to pry into other
people's business. I don't want to help you, after all."

She would have to save herself.

Like Oshino always said.

"Stop me if you've heard this. It's an old story from overseas. Once
upon a time, there was a young man. He was a good man. One day,
this young man met a strange old man in the village. The old man
asked the young man to sell him his shadow."

"His shadow?"

"Yeah. The shadow that sprang from his legs when the sun shone
upon him. Sell it for ten coins. The young man did, without a
second's thought. Sold his shadow for ten coins."

"...so?"

"What would you have done?"

"Dunno. Wouldn't know without that actually happening to me.

Maybe I'd sell, maybe I wouldn't. Depends on the price."
"That's the right answer. If I asked you which was more important,
your money or your life, well...that question's wrong to begin with.
'Money' doesn't mean anything. There's a big difference between
one yen and a trillion. One is worth more than the other. Life means
more to some people than it does to others. All life is equal? I loathe
the very idea. Anyway, this young man didn't think his shadow
was worth more than ten coins. Why would he? What would you
miss out on, if you had no shadow? What problems could that
possibly cause?"

Oshino shuddered.

"But once he lost his shadow, everyone in town, even his family,
hated him. He couldn't get along with anybody. Having no
shadow...was creepy. Of course it was. Hella creepy. Shadows
themselves can be pretty creepy, but not having a shadow is even
creepier. The absence of something you're supposed to have. In
other words, the young man had sold something he was meant to
have...for ten coins."

He let that hang for a moment.

"The young man went looking for the old man, to get his shadow
back. But no matter where he went, no matter who he asked, he
never did find the man. The end."

"So," Senjougahara said, not batting an eye. "What of it?"

"Well, nothing, really. Just thought it might be a story that struck a

chord with you. The young man may have sold his shadow, but you
lost your weight."

"I didn't sell it."

"No. You did not. You traded it. Losing your weight may not be as
big a problem as losing your shadow...but it causes just as many
problems, socially. That's it."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, I'm done talking," he said, and clapped his hands, once.
"Okay. If you'd like to get your weight back, then I'll do what I can.
Araragi-kun introduced you, after all."

"You'll help me?"

"I will not. I'll just do what I can," Oshino said, glancing at his
watch. On his left wrist. "Sun's still out, so head on home. Wash
your body in cold water, put on some clean clothes. Got some
preparations on my end. If you're in Araragi-kun's class, you're
probably a pretty serious student, so I should ask...are you able to
come out at night?"

"Yes. If the occasion demands."

"Then we'll meet up again here at the stroke of midnight."

"Fine. By clean clothes, you mean...?"

"Don't need to be new. Not your uniform, though. You wear that
every day."

"And what do I owe you?"

"Mm?"

"Don't play dumb. You're not doing this on a volunteer basis."

"Oh, hmm..." Oshino glanced over me, as if appraising me. "Well, if
that makes you feel better about it, then a hundred thousand yen."

"A hundred thousand," she said, as if confirming it.

"Work part time at a fast food place a month or two, and you ought
to earn that much easily. Seems fair."

"Quite a bargain, compared to mine."

"Is it? I charged class-rep chan a hundred grand as well."

"And you charged me five million!"

"Well, you were a vampire."

"You can't blame everything on vampires! Who cares if they're

trendy right now!"

"Can you pay?" he asked, ignoring my cries.

"Of course," she said. "No matter what I have to do."

And then...

Two hours later, in her room.

Senjougahara's apartment.

I looked around again.

A hundred thousand yen might not be that much normally, but

judging from the state of her room, it was probably quite a lot to
Senjougahara.
A chest of drawers, a tea table, and a little bookcase. That was it. For
all the books she read, there were surprisingly few in her room. She
must get the bulk of them from used book stores and libraries.

Like an impoverished student.

Which, I suppose, Senjougahara was.

She'd said she was attending school on a scholarship.

Oshino had suggested Senjougahara was luckier than me, but I had
my doubts.

Certainly, her life wasn't in the same kind of danger, and she was
less of a danger to those around her -- few things came close to
vampires on those two fronts. I lost track of how many times I'd
wished I'd just died instead, and that was an easy trap to fall back
into, even now.

So, yeah.

Senjougahara might be on the lucky side of bad luck. But in light of

how Hanekawa had described her life in junior high, it was really
hard to see it that way.

It definitely wasn't a fair comparison.

Hanekawa...how did Hanekawa Tsubasa compare?

There was a woman with a powerfully strange experience.

I was attacked by a demon, Senjougahara met a crab, and

Hanekawa was transfixed by a cat. Over Golden Week. What
transpired was so overwhelming it felt like something in the distant
past. But it had only been a few days before.

Although Hanekawa herself retained no memories of Golden Week.

All she really knew was that Oshino had managed to take care of it
some how, so perhaps she had no real grasp of just how bad things
had been. But I remembered everything.

It was an absolute mess.

Even after surviving the demon. I had never imagined a cat could
possibly be more terrifying than a demon.

Again, in light of risk to life and limb, Hanekawa's experience was

worse than Senjougahara's. But in light of how long Senjougahara
had suffered in silence, things weren't that simple.

It all mattered.

It was all worth considering.

How bad did things have to be for you to consider kindness the act
of an enemy?

The young man who sold his shadow.

The girl who lost her weight.

I could never know.

I could never hope to understand.

"Done with my shower," Senjougahara said, stepping out of the

bathroom.
Naked.

I shrieked, cowering.

"Move aside. I can't reach my clothes."

Senjougahara pointed at the chest of drawers behind me. She

appeared to be more annoyed by her wet hair than she was
concerned about me seeing her.

"Put some clothes on!"

"I plan to."

"You plan to!?"

"Would you prefer I didn't?"

"Why haven't you already!?"

"I forgot to bring some in with me."

"Then wrap a towel around yourself or something!"

"Ew, that would just be sad."

I didn't know how she could be so blas about it.

It was plain as day there was no point in arguing the point, so I

scooted out of the way, and plunked myself down in front of the
bookshelf, studiously counting the spines in front of me. Trying to
focus my gaze and my thoughts.

Augh.
I'd never seen a naked woman before...not in real life, anyway.

It wasn't quite what I'd imagined. I still maintain I had pretty

grounded ideas about what it would be like, but what I'd imagined
was not this...stark nudism, this frank indifference.

"Clean clothes...you suppose white is better?"

"No idea."

"All my underwear has patterns."

"None of my business!"

"I'm just asking for advice. No need to get so loud. Honestly, it's like
you're going through menopause."

I heard the drawer open.

Clothing rustled.

This was bad.

It was burned into my brain. It wouldn't go away.

"Araragi-kun. You aren't turned on by me being naked, are you?"

"If I hypothetically was, it would not be my fault."

"Go ahead and lay a single finger on me. I hear biting off tongues is
always fatal."

"Yes, yes, you're very protective of your body."

"I was planning on biting your tongue."

"That is duly terrifying."

Sheesh.

She seemed incapable of seeing the situation from my point of view.

Was it impossible for any human being to understand another?

Was this a notion I should just learn to accept?

"Don't worry, you can look now."

"Okay. Good."

I turned around.

She was still in her underwear.

Not even wearing socks.

"What are you trying to accomplish here!?"

"What do you think? I'm rewarding you for your help today. Be
happy."

"...................."

A reward?

Baffling.

I'd rather have an apology.

"Be happy!"
"Now you're mad!?"

"Manners dictate you express an opinion!"

"A-an opinion?"

Manners?

How should I answer?

Um...

"Y-you have a great body...?"

"...pathetic."

She gave me the sort of look usually reserved for rotting refuse.

But with a trace of pity.

"You'll always be a virgin."

"I'll always be...? Did you come from the future!?"

"Try not to spit. Virginity is contagious."

"It's not a disease!"

Once lost, it never came back.

"For that matter, why have we simply assumed that I'm a virgin?"

"Because you are. No child would ever sleep with you."

"Two objections! First, I am not a pedophile! Secondly, I definitely
think I could find a few if I looked hard enough!"

"If the first is true the second can't be."

".............."

Good point.

"But I admit it was presumptuous of me."

"I'm glad to hear it."

"If you've used a professional..."

"Okay, okay, I admit it! I'm a virgin!"

The most humiliating thing I had ever confessed to.

Senjougahara seemed very pleased.

"You should have said so in the first place. You've used up half the
luck the rest of your life had allotted to it, so keep still and
appreciate."

"Are you secretly a shinigami?"

Make a deal with a shinigami, see a naked girl.

Best shinigami eyes ever.

"Don't worry," she said. As she spoke, she took a white shirt out
from her chest of drawers, and put it on over the light blue bra. It
seemed ridiculous to count the books on her shelf again, so I just
watched. "I won't tell Hanekawa-san."
"Hanekawa...?"

"You have a one-sided crush on her, right?"

"Not true."

"Oh? You talk so often I simply assumed. Hence the leading

question."

"Who uses leading questions in real life?"

"Hush. Do you wish to be erased?"

"Just how much power do you wield?"

I was a bit surprised to hear Senjougahara had actually paid that

much attention to the rest of us. I'd actually wondered if she even
knew I was assistant class-rep. Or maybe she had just assumed we
would one day be her enemies, and scouted us.

"It's less that we talk and more than she keeps talking to me."

"Who do you think you are? Are you trying to imply Hanekawa-san
has a crush on you?"

"That's absolutely not true," I said. "Hanekawa is just...looking after

me. She's a busybody, really. Overprotective. She's got this hilarious
idea that it's worth feeling sorry for losers. And she wants to help
fix them."

"That is a hilarious idea," Senjougahara said. "Losers are losers

because they were born stupid."

"...I wouldn't say that."

"But it's written on your face."

"It is not!"

"I thought you'd say that, so I wrote it there a moment ago."

"Nobody's that prepared!"

Frankly.

I didn't need to say much here; Senjougahara should understand

Hanekawa as well as I did. Judging by what she'd told me after
school, Hanekawa was paying more than a little attention to
Senjougahara.

But perhaps that explained it.

"Oshino-san helped Hanekawa-san too?"

"Mm. Yeah."

Senjougahara finished buttoning her shirt, and proceeded to don a

white cardigan on top of it. Apparently she planned to fully dress
her upper body before putting anything else on the lower half. I
suppose everyone had different ways of getting dressed.
Senjougahara did not seem at all concerned that I was watching.
Actually, she seemed to have deliberately placed herself in front of
me.

"Hmm."

"So...I mean, you can trust him. He's not the most serious guy in the
world; jaunty and cavalier and what have you, but he knows his
stuff. Don't worry. You don't have to take my word for it. He did
the same with Hanekawa."

"So you say, Araragi-kun," Senjougahara said. "But I'm afraid I only
half trust him. I have been tricked too many times."

"..............."

Five people had said the same thing.

They'd all been liars.

And...

That did not seem like the end of it.

"Even the hospital -- I only go out of inertia. Honestly, I've pretty

much given up."

"Given up...?"

What had she given up?

What had she cast aside?

"This world may be bizarre, but it has neither Mugen Mamiya or

Kudan Kumiko."

"....................."

"The best it can manage is Touge Miroku," Senjougahara said, voice

dripping with disgust. "So Araragi-kun, I'm simply not carefree
enough to cheerily accept that I just happened to slip on the stairs
and the classmate that just happened to catch me just happened to
have been bit by a vampire over spring break and the person who
just happened to save him also just happened to help the class-rep
and now he just happens to be attempting to help me."

And with that, Senjougahara began taking off her cardigan.

"Finally you had some clothes on -- why are you taking them off
again?"

"I forgot to dry my hair."

"Are you actually a bit of an idiot?"

"Don't be rude. What if you hurt my feelings?"

Her dryer looked expensive.

Apparently she took pains towards her appearance.

Looking her over again, even her underwear was carefully chosen.
It was odd how what had, a day before, been a major focus
controlling a significant portion of my thoughts now seemed like
little more than a few scraps of cloth. I shed a silent tear inside.

"Carefree...?"

"I'm not that."

"Maybe. But what if you were?" I said. "What if you were carefree?"

"................"

"It's not a bad thing to be. You've got nothing to hide, after all. Just
be confident, like you are now."

"Like I am now?" Senjougahara said, baffled.

Apparently she was unaware just how amazing her performance
here had been.

"It's not a bad thing...?"

"Is it?"

"Suppose not," she said. Then, "But I might be hiding something."

"Mm?"

"Never mind."

With her hair finally dry, she put the dryer down, and began
putting clothes on again. Since she'd put them on over wet hair, her
first outfit was damp, so she hung the shirt and cardigan up on
hangers, and began hunting through her chest of drawers for
something else.

"In my next life," Senjougahara said. "I want to be Sergeant Major

Kululu."

"..................."

This seemed like a non sequitur, yet it also made a certain kind of
sense.

"I know what you want to say. That seemed like a non sequitur, and
you don't see why I would."

"Uh, about half right."

"Thought so."

"I mean, at the least, you could have said Lance Corporal Dororo."
"His trauma switch hits a little too close to home."

"Okay, but..."

"No buts. Or mutts."

"Mutts?"

I couldn't even work out what she'd mistaken that for.

I'd totally lost track of her larger point as well.

Presumably she agreed, since she immediately changed the subject.

"May I ask you something, Araragi-kun? Not anything important."

"Okay."

"What did you mean by 'patterns on the moon'?"

"Hunh? When did I say that?"

"Earlier. To Oshino-san."

"Um..."

Oh.

Now I remembered.

"Right, Oshino was going on about it being a crab or a rabbit or a

beautiful woman -- those. In Japan people generally say it looks like
a rabbit with mochi but other countries have it as a crab or a
woman's face in profile, or so on."
I hadn't verified this in person, but so I'd heard. Senjougahara
appeared to have never come across the information before.

"I'm astonished you bothered retaining such useless information.

For the first time ever, you've actually managed to impress me."

With useless information.

Kind of a backhanded compliment.

I decided to show off.

"I know a lot about astronomy and space. I was pretty into it for a
while."

"Don't bother bragging to me. I see right through it. It's not like you
know anything else."

"Words can hurt, you know."

"Then call the word police."

"..............."

Even the real police were no match for her.

"I do know things! Like, um, for example, do you know why there's
a rabbit on the moon?"

"There is no rabbit on the moon, Araragi-kun. You're in high school

now, you should know these things."

"Say there is."

Wait, was that right?

Say there was?

Confusing.

"Once upon a time there was a god, or a Buddha maybe...same

difference. There was a god, and for that god a rabbit threw itself
onto a fire, and burned to death -- sacrificing itself to the god. This
god was touched by this act of self-sacrifice, and put the rabbit on
the moon so we'd never forget it."

I'd just seen the story on TV as a kid, and I didn't remember it all
that well, so it wasn't exactly an exhaustive bit of knowledge, but I
had the gist of it.

"Wow, that god is a prick. Made a mockery of that poor rabbit."

"That's not really the point."

"And the rabbit too -- you can totally see it trying to get on god's
side by sacrificing itself. Scheming little shit."

"It's really not about that."

"Well, I certainly can't understand it," she snapped, and started

taking off her clothes again.

"Okay, you're really just flaunting your body at me, aren't you?"

"I don't have a body worth flaunting. It was just inside out and
backwards."

"That's quite an accomplishment."

"I'll admit I'm not great at getting dressed."

"You're like a child."

"No. They're heavy."

"Erp."

Missed that one.

If her shoes were heavy, her clothes would be too.

At ten times their regular weight, clothes were not to be trifled with.

I was ashamed.

It had been a careless remark, completely lacking in tact.

"I might get tired of this but I do not get used to it. But you are more
learned than I expected, Araragi-kun. Allow me to express mild
surprise. There may actually be a brain inside your skull."

"Of course there is."

"Of course...? That a brain can form inside the skull of your ilk is a
miracle."

"Now you're just being mean."

"Don't worry, I'm just stating the truth."

"At least one person in this room clearly deserves to die."

"? Hoshina-sensei isn't here."

"Did you just wish death upon our beloved homeroom teacher?"
"Is the crab the same?"

"Hunh?"

"Did a crab throw itself on the fire like the rabbit?"

"Oh, um, no, I don't know the crab's story. Must have one
somewhere. Never thought about it. Because the moon has seas?"

"The moon has no seas. And you seemed so sure you were saying
something clever."

"Eh? It doesn't? But they --"

"Your knowledge of astronomy astounds. They are only seas in

name."

"Oh."

Hmm.

I guess I couldn't compete with actual smart people.

"So your true identity is revealed, Araragi-kun. It was sloppy of me

to expect anything but ignorance from you."

"You really do think I'm an idiot, don't you?"

"How did you know!?"

"You seem genuinely surprised!"

She thought she'd hidden it?

Really?
"This is all my fault. Because of me, you have realized what a mess
your little mind is. I feel responsible."

"Hang on a minute, am I really this abysmally dumb?"

"Never fear. I do not judge people by their grades."

"You've already judged what mine are!"

"Try not to spit. Bad grades are contagious."

"Look, we go to the same school."

"But will both of us graduate?"

"Erp..."

That was actually in doubt.

"I will move on to grad school. You will drop out of high school."

"I'm third year! I just have to finish it out!"

"Yet soon you will be begging me to let you quit, tears running
down your cheeks."

"I've never heard anyone talk like that outside of manga!"

"Compare standard scores. Mine is 74."

"Argh."

She'd already won.

"Only 46."
"That rounds down to zero."

"What? No it doesn't, it's a six...wait, you're rounding down the tens

place! What have you done to my standard score!?"

She had me beat by nearly thirty but had to whip the corpse!

"I don't feel I've won unless the margin is at least a hundred."

"You've rounded your own tens place, too!?"

Ruthless.

"Good, from now on, please remain at least twenty thousand

kilometers away from me at all times."

"I've been banished from the Earth!?"

"Did that god even bother eating the rabbit?"

"Hunh? Oh, back to the story. Did he eat it? If the story covered
that, it would be pretty grisly."

"It already is."

"I dunno. I'm stupid, remember?"

"Don't sulk. You might make me less happy."

"You have no pity at all, do you?"

"Pitying you will not bring peace to this world."

"If you can save a single soul, don't start talking globally! Extend a
helping hand to those in front of you! I'm sure you can do it!"
"Okay, all done."

Senjougahara was now wearing a white tank top, a white jacket,

and a white flare skirt.

"If this all goes well, a trip to Hokkaido to eat crab is in order."

"We can eat crab without going to Hokkaido, and it's out of season
anyway, but if you want to, then go ahead."

"You're coming too."

"Why!?"

"Didn't you know?" Senjougahara smiled. "Crab is delicious."

006

Our home town was on the fringes of the suburbs.

At night it was very dark. Pitch black. The abandoned building was
so distant from daylight it seemed the same inside or out.

I'd been born and raised here so this did not seem strange, did not
seem mystifying in any way -- in fact, it was the normal order of
things, the natural way of the world -- but Oshino had traveled far
and wide, and he said that discrepancy was the root of many
problems.

It was nice having the roots so easily found.

According to him, anyway.

At any rate...

It was just after midnight.

Senjougahara and I rode back to the ruined cram school. She had
taken a cushion from her home and attached it to her seat on the
back of the bike.

We'd eaten nothing, and were hungry.

I parked the bike in the same place, and we slipped through the gap
in the fence. Oshino was waiting for us outside the door.

As if he'd been there the whole time.

"...eh?"

Oshino's clothing seemed to surprise Senjougahara.

He was wearing white holy robes -- je. He'd even combed his hair;
he looked like a different person. One not at all slovenly.

Clothes make the man.

Why did he seem creepier like this?

"Oshino-san...you're a priest?"

"No, not at all?" he said. "Neither priest nor monk. Went to school
for it, but never got a job. It was complicated."

"Complicated?"

"Personal reasons. Boils down to just getting sick of it all. The

clothes serve the same function as yours. I just didn't have anything
else clean. We're meeting a god here, so I've got to clean up, same as
you. Set the right tone. Tone is important. When I fought Araragi-
kun, I had a cross in one hand, a bunch of garlic hanging off me,
and some Holy Water. Fit the situation. I may not have much use
for manners, but I know what I'm doing here. You won't catch me
waving a wand around and scattering salt on your head."

"O-okay," Senjougahara said.

It was certainly a surprise seeing him like this, but her reaction
seemed a bit too strong. Why?

"You look nice and purified. Good. Just to be sure, you're not
wearing make-up?"

"I didn't think it would be a good idea, so no."

"Good. Right decision. You took a shower too, Araragi-kun?"

"Yeah. No problem there."

It was a necessary step if I was going to sit in on things. I avoided

mentioning Senjougahara's attempt to peek on me in the shower.

"Yet you look exactly the same."

"Yeah, yeah."

Since I was just an observer, I had not changed clothes at all. Of

course I looked the same.

"Let's get this over with. Prepared a space upstairs."

"A space?"
"Yes."

Oshino vanished into the darkness inside. Even in white clothes he

was swallowed instantly. Once again, I took Senjougahara's hand,
and led her after him.

"'Let's get this over with?' Not exactly taking this seriously, then?" I
asked.

"What's that supposed to mean? I've dragged two young kids out to
a deserted location in the middle of the night. It's my responsibility
to get you back home and in bed as soon as I can."

"I was just wondering if we can really kick this crab's ass that
easily."

"What a violent proposition, Araragi-kun. Did something good

happen?" Oshino said, not even glancing back. "It's not like you and
Shinobu-chan, or class rep-chan and the sex cat. And don't forget,
I'm a pacifist. I normally avoid violence at all costs. You and class
rep-chan were both targeted maliciously, but that doesn't apply to
this crab."

"It doesn't?"

If there was a victim, didn't that imply malice, imply hostility?

"Like I said, we're dealing with a god. Gods are just there. They
don't do anything. They simply exist. Just like you simply go home
after school. It's her own fault this happened."

No harm. No assault.

No possession.
'Her own fault' was not the nicest way to put it, but Senjougahara
said nothing. Either it made sense to her, or she had steeled herself
to take whatever he might say, mindful of what we were about to
do.

"So we won't be banishing it or kicking its ass, Araragi-kun. Put that

kind of thing out of your mind. We are going to ask it for a favor.
Ask for its mercy."

"Ask it...?"

"Yes."

"Will it agree to that? Will it just give Senjougahara her weight

back?"

"Can't say for sure, but probably. Not like wandering by a shrine on
New Year's, after all. They're not so indifferent they'd ignore an
earnest entreaty. Gods are always looking at the big picture.
Japanese gods are particularly out of it. They care about humanity
as a whole, maybe, but as individuals? They don't really notice us.
We don't matter at all. They can't tell me apart from you apart from
Shinobu-chan. Age, gender, weight -- doesn't matter. We're all just
'human.' We're all the same thing."

The same thing.

Not just similar. The same.

"Hmm. Very different from curses."

"So," Senjougahara said, as if she'd been trying to work up the nerve

to ask. "Is the crab...nearby?"
"Yeah. Nearby, near to everywhere. But to make it come here, we
need to do some things."

We reached the third floor.

And went into one of the classrooms.

The entire room was covered in Shinto holy ropes. All the desks and
chairs had been removed, and in front of the chalkboard was an
altar. An offering placed on the stand. It didn't look like something
hastily thrown together while we were gone. Lamps were lit in the
corners, bathing the room in soft light.

"A barrier, basically. Makeshift holy ground. Nothing fancy. You

can relax," he said, looking at Senjougahara.

"I am...relaxed."

"Good to hear." We stepped inside. "Both of you -- lower your gaze,

and keep your head down."

"Eh?"

"You're before a god."

We all stood before the altar.

This was so different from how we'd dealt with mine, or with
Hanekawa's. I was the one who wasn't relaxed. The air felt tense --
so tense it could drive a man mad.

I hunkered down.

Ready for anything.

I was not religious; like most people my age, I could barely tell the
difference between Shinto and Buddhism, but there was a part of
me, instinct or something similar, that reacted to times like this.

To this time.

And place.

"Um, Oshino..."

"What, Araragi-kun?"

"I was just thinking...given the situation and this whole space
you've made...should I even be here? It just feels like I'm in the
way."

"You won't be. I doubt there'll be any problems, but just in case
there is... You gotta think about what might happen in a just-in-case
scenario. That happens, you'll need to shield her."

"I will?"

"What else is that immortal body for?"

"....................."

That certainly was a good line, but I was pretty sure that wasn't
what it was for.

And I wasn't immortal any more.

"Araragi-kun," Senjougahara said. "You will protect me, won't you?"

"When did you become a princess!?"

"Oh, come on. You were planning on killing yourself tomorrow
anyway."

"That didn't last long."

That was the sort of thing you wouldn't even say behind someone's
back, but she'd just said it to my face. I might have to give some
serious thought to figuring out what terrible sin I'd committed in a
previous life to deserve such vicious spite.

"I'm not asking you to do it for free."

"What'll you give me?"

"You want a material reward? How shallow. I'm not exaggerating

when I say that single question encompasses all your failings as a
human being."

"...so what'll you do for me?"

"Let's see...I suppose I'll abandon my plan to spread a rumor that

you're such a creep you tried to equip Nera with the slave clothes
when you played Dragon Quest V."

"I never did!"

And she'd planned to tell everyone?

How heartless.

"It should have been obvious you couldn't put those on her. Even a
monkey would know that. No, I suppose in your case it would be
'even a dog', right?"
"Hang on! You might be acting like you just said something terribly
clever, but has there been a single description of me this entire time
that suggested I resembled a dog in any way?"

"True," Senjougahara laughed. "It wouldn't be fair to the dog."

"......................!!"

Even a cliche line like that could be devastating when used with
such impeccable timing. This woman truly was a master insulter.

"Very well. Be a coward, run away with your tail between your legs.
Go home and do what you always do: sit alone and pretend to be
tasered."

"What kind of sick pastime is that!?"

How many malicious rumors was she planning to start?

"When you reach my level, the likes of you cannot hope to hide
anything. I know all your deepest dullest secrets."

"You used the wrong word and somehow made it worse!? Are you
blackmailing the universe!?"

I wouldn't put it past her.

I'd definitely rather have dark secrets than dull ones.

"Anyway, Oshino, instead of using me, you could use the

vamp...Shinobu. Like we did with Hanekawa."

"Shinobu's already gone beddy bye," Oshino said.

"......................"
A vampire that slept at night.

That was so sad.

Oshino took the offering of sake off the altar, and handed it to
Senjougahara.

"Um...what do I...?" she stammered.

"Drinking alcohol decreases the distance between us and gods. It'll

help you relax a little, anyway."

"...I'm underage."

"No need to drink that much. Just a sip."

"...................."

She stared at him for a long moment, and then took a drink. He took
the cup from her hands, and placed it back on the altar.

"Okay. First, let's calm ourselves."

Facing forwards...

His back to Senjougahara, Oshino spoke.

"We begin by being calm. Mood is important. If we create a proper

space, the ritual itself is not a problem -- it all boils down to how
you feel."

"How I feel...?"
"Relax. Let your guard down. This is your place. A place where you
belong. Put your head down, close your eyes, and count. One. Two.
Three."

Perhaps...

I didn't need to follow suit, but I chose to. I closed my eyes, and
counted with her. As I did, I realized...

This was all to set the tone.

Oshino's clothes, the ropes, the altar, the shower -- all designed to
put Senjougahara in the necessary frame of mind.

Hypnotic suggestion.

He was basically hypnotizing her.

Take away her self-consciousness, relax her guard, and convince her
to trust him -- his approach was different, but he'd had to go
through much the same process with me and with Hanekawa.
Salvation was for those who believed -- in other words, the first step
was to get Senjougahara to accept things.

Senjougahara herself had said...

She only half trusted him.

But...

That wasn't enough.

She needed more.

Trust was important.

This was what Oshino meant when he said he would not save her,
but she would save herself.

I opened my eyes.

Looked around.

Torches.

Flickering in the corners.

Wind from the window.

The lights flickering, ready to vanish in the first strong gust.

But they did not.

"Are we calm?"

"Yes."

"Then time for some questions. Answer the questions I ask you.
What's your name?"

"Senjougahara Hitagi."

"Your school?"

"Naoetsu High School."

"Your birthday?"

"July 7th."

His questions were pointless, their contents without meaning.

Question after question.

The pace never changing.

Oshino's back to her.

Senjougahara's eyes closed, her head down.

Her face turned towards the floor.

The room so quiet you could hear us breathing, almost hear our
hearts beating.

"Your favorite writer?"

"Yumeno Kyusaku."

"A mistake you made as a child?"

"I don't want to answer that."

"An old song you like?"

"I don't listen to music."

"What did you think when you graduated elementary school?"

"I was just moving to a different school. Public school to public

school."

"What was your first crush like?"

"I don't want to answer that."

"What was the most painful moment," Oshino said, his tone never
changing, "in your life?"

"........................."

Senjougahara failed to answer.

She did not refuse. She just fell silent. I could tell this was the only
question that had mattered.

"What's wrong? The most painful thing you can remember."

"...my..."

Clearly, she could not stay silent.

She could not refuse to answer.

The mood did not allow it.

This space did not permit it.

She'd been led here to answer.

"My mother..."

"Your mother?"

"Joined a cult."

And a particularly bad one.

She told me earlier...

...how her mother emptied her bank account, took out loans, drove
them into financial ruin. How even after the divorce, her father was
working overtime every day, barely sleeping, trying to pay off those
loans.

Was this her most painful memory?

Worse than losing her weight?

Of course.

Of course it was worse.

But...it...

It was...

"Is that all?"

"...all?"

"It's not very much. Japanese laws guarantee religious freedom.

Freedom to believe what you want is a fundamental human right.
Whatever your mother believes, whatever she worships, the only
difference is methodology."

"......................"

"In other words...it's not enough," Oshino insisted. "Tell me what

happened."

"What hap...m-my mother...for me. She joined the cult, they tricked
her..."

"What happened after your mother joined the cult?"

After.

Senjougahara bit her lip.

"S-she brought a man from the cult home with her."

"A man from the cult. What did he do?"

"A-a purification ritual, he said."

"Purification? Purifying what?"

"He said he...had to purify me." She could barely get the words out.
"Th-then he assaulted me."

"Assaulted. Violently? Or...sexually?"

"...sexually. Th-that man..." Senjougahara forced herself to say it.

"He tried to rape me."

"...I see," Oshino nodded.

The way Senjougahara...

...was so oddly protective of herself.

Trusted no one.

Was so defensive and so aggressive.

This explained all of it.

And why she'd reacted like that when she saw Oshino in those
robes.
To her eyes, they must not have been that different from what the
cult wore.

"Even though he was a priest."

"That's a Buddhist perspective. There are religions that allow

murder, within the family. Beliefs are not universal. But you said
'tried' -- was he not successful?"

"I grabbed my cleats, and hit him."

"...brave."

"He started bleeding. Writhing in pain."

"And you were safe?"

"I was safe."

"Good."

"But my mother didn't help me."

She'd watched the whole thing.

Senjougahara's voice never wavered.

Never faltered.

"She yelled at me."

"Is that all?"

"No. Because I hurt that man...my mother..."

"...was penalized?" Oshino cut ahead of her.

Even I could have guessed the answer, but...it seemed to work on

Senjougahara.

"Yes," she said, nodding solemnly.

"Her daughter hurt a church official. Not surprising."

"Right. That's why...all our money. Our home. Our property. All the
loans. She destroyed our family. Completely ruined it, ruined
everything, but she kept on destroying things. She still is."

"Where is she now?"

"I don't know."

"You must know."

"I'm sure...she's still with them."

"She still believes."

"She never learned. She feels no shame."

"That hurts?"

"It does."

"Why does it hurt? She's not your mother any more."

"I keep thinking. If I hadn't...if I hadn't fought back. Then...none of

this would have happened."

Her family would still be together.

They'd never have been torn apart.

"Do you think that?"

"I do...think that."

"Really?"

"...I do."

"Then that...is what you think," Oshino said. "No matter how much
it weighs, you have to carry that burden. You can't make others
carry it for you."

"Make others...?"

"Keep your eyes steady. Open your eyes...and look."

And...

Oshino opened his eyes.

Senjougahara did the same.

Torches in the corners.

Their flames flickering.

Our shadows...

...our shadows wavering.

Wobbling.

Swirling.
"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"

Senjougahara screamed.

Her head was still lowered, barely; her eyes wide like she could not
believe them. Her body trembled. Sweat poured down her face.

She was panicking.

Senjougahara was panicking.

"Do you...see something?" Oshino said.

"I do. It's the same...a giant crab. I see a crab."

"Okay. I don't see a thing," he said, turning around and looking at

me. "Can you see it, Araragi-kun?"

"...no."

All I could see...

Were flickering lights.

And writhing shadows.

Almost the same as seeing nothing.

I could not make it out.

"I can't...see much of anything."

"See?" Oshino turned back to Senjougahara. "You don't really see a

crab, do you?"
"I do. Clearly. I can see it."

"A trick of the mind."

"No. It's here."

"Okay. Then..."

He followed her gaze.

As if there was something there.

As if there was something there.

"Then there's something you need to say."

"Say...?"

Then...

She must not have been thinking.

It wasn't a conscious choice, I'm sure.

But Senjougahara raised her head.

I suppose...

This was all too much for her.

Just a mistake.

But the reason for it didn't matter.

Human reasons didn't matter.

The instant she looked up, Senjougahara went flying backwards.

She was flung backwards.

Like she weighed nothing at all, her feet never touching the ground,
very fast. Until she slammed into the chalkboard at the far end of
the room.

Slammed into it...

...and stayed there.

Not falling.

Pinned to the wall.

Crucified.

"S-Senjougahara!"

"Tch. I told you to shield her, Araragi-kun. You always did trip up
when you were most needed. What are you standing there for?"

He looked disappointed. It had all happened in the blink of an eye,

so I'm not sure I deserved it.

Senjougahara was plastered against the chalkboard as if gravity had

changed direction.

Her body pressing into the wall.

Cracks had appeared on the wall around her.

Like she was being crushed against it.

She groaned, unable to scream.

In pain.

But I still couldn't see anything.

She was just plastered against the wall, held there by nothing. But
she could see it.

The crab.

A giant crab.

The crab of burden.

"Oh well. Man, what a picky god. Hadn't even greeted the thing yet.
What a nice guy. Did something good happen?"

"Uh...Oshino..."

"Yeah, yeah. Change of plans. No help for it. Either way works for
me. Always did."

He sighed, and shuffled over to her.

Looking fed up.

Then he reached out...

...and grabbed the air a few inches from her face.

And yanked.

"Hokay," he muttered, and slammed whatever it was into the floor,

hard, like a judo throw. There was no sound. No dust scattered. But
he slammed it to the ground just as hard as it had Senjougahara --
maybe even harder. And without pausing for breath, he jumped on
top of it.

Stomped on a god.

Violently.

Disrespectful and sacrilegious.

This pacifist was not in awe of any god.

".............."

From where I stood, it looked like Oshino was performing a mime

routine. A particularly frenzied one. Currently he was standing on
one leg, maintaining his balance perfectly. But to Senjougahara's
eyes...

It must be quite a sight.

Her eyes had nearly popped out of her head.

Whatever was keeping her fixed to the wall must have let go,
because she slid to the ground. It was not that far a fall, and she
weighed next to nothing, so it would normally not have been much
of an impact, but it took her completely by surprise, and she landed
awkwardly.

"You okay?" Oshino called out, staring fixedly at his own feet.

His eyes narrowed, as if measuring the value of something.

"Crabs. No matter how big they are -- actually, the bigger the better
-- once you flip them over, they're done for. Flat bodies were made
to be stomped on, if you ask me. What do you say, Araragi-kun?" he
asked. "We could start over. Would take time. Might be faster for
me to just crush it."

"Crush it? Well...all she did was raise her head for a second."

"That's enough, though. More than enough. We're led by feelings,

here. If we can't ask nicely, we've got to play a more dangerous
game. Like we did with the demon and the cat. If words won't
work, we have to fight. Same way governments work. If I crush it,
well, her problem resolves. Technically. Can't recommend it; the
root of the problem remains. Treating the symptoms. Like cutting a
weed instead of digging it out. But maybe that's enough..."

"Maybe?"

"You see, Araragi-kun," Oshino said, grinning. "I really hate crabs."

Too hard to eat.

He leaned forward.

Putting his weight on it.

"Wait."

A voice behind him.

It belonged to Senjougahara.

Patting her grazed knees, she sat up.

"Wait. Please, Oshino-san."

"Wait?" he said, looking back at her.

His smile not fading.

"Wait for what?"

"I was just surprised," she said. "But I can do this. I can handle it."

"Hunh."

He did not take his foot away.

It kept the crab pinned down.

But he didn't crush it.

"Then go ahead."

And Senjougahara...

Did something I found extremely hard to believe. She knelt down,

straightened up her back, put her hands on the floor, and slowly,
with deep respect...bowed to the thing under Oshino's foot.

Her head nearly touched the floor.

Senjougahara Hitagi had voluntarily humbled herself before it.

Without anyone telling her to do so.

"I'm sorry."

First, she apologized.

"And...thank you."

Then, she expressed gratitude.

"But...it's gone on long enough. These are my feelings. My thoughts.

My memories. I will take them back. I should never have lost them."

And finally...

"Please. Please. Give me back my weight. My burden."

Her last words were a prayer, a plea.

"Give my mother back to me."

With a thud, Oshino's foot hit the floor.

Not because he had stomped on it.

It was just not there any more.

As if it had never been there.

It was gone.

Oshino Meme said nothing. He just stood there.

Even though she knew it was gone, Senjougahara Hitagi did not sit
up. She simply started crying. All Araragi Koyomi could do was
watch.

And begin to wonder if Senjougahara really, really, really was a

tsundere.
 007

The time line.

I'd got the time line confused.

I'd assumed Senjougahara met the crab, lost her weight, and that led
to her mother being crazy enough to join a cult. But it was the other
way around; Senjougahara's mother had joined the cult long before
Senjougahara encountered the crab, and it took her weight away.

I should have guessed.

While staplers and utility knives were things you might have lying
around the house, cleats were definitely not. The moment she
mentioned them, I should have realized that this had happened
when she was still on the track team -- in junior high. By the time
she started high school, and did not participate in PE, let alone track
team, she would never have owned a pair of cleats.

Apparently her mother had first joined the cult when Senjougahara
was in the fifth grade. Well before even Hanekawa knew her.

At the time, she'd been a frail kid.

Actually sick, not just believed to be.

She had something bad -- you'd know the name if I mentioned it.
Her odds of surviving it were less than ten percent, and the doctors
were ready to give up.

Things were so bad...

Senjougahara's mother needed some respite.

They took advantage of it.

Senjougahara's operation defied the odds -- a fact that most likely

had nothing to do with the cult, although Oshino pointed out that
we had no way of being sure. When I was at Senjougahara's house,
if I had chosen to inspect her naked body closely, I might have
noticed the faint operation scars on her back...but obviously, I had
done no such thing.

And the way she'd faced me, and put her shirt on first...well, I guess
I'd been wrong to suggest she was showing off her body.

She'd asked for my opinion.

At any rate, when Senjougahara's life was saved, her mother...sank

even deeper into the cult's clutches.

Believing they had saved her daughter's life.

They had her hooked.

A classic pattern.

But the family stuck together. I knew nothing about the cult's actual
practices or beliefs, but for the most part, they did not seem to
upend their follower's lives. Her father earned enough, and they'd
been rich to begin with, which helped; but as the years passed, her
mother's beliefs deepened, and their hold on her increased.

They were a family in name only.

Senjougahara was no longer speaking to her mother.

When she was still in elementary school, they'd remained close, but
things had grown increasingly strained after she entered junior
high. From the way Hanekawa described her then, it was hard to
imagine something like that eating at her.

Perhaps it created her.

Made her great.

Forced her to try and be as perfect as she could be.

To show her mother how perfect she could be, to prove she could be
great without help from any cult.

Despite not talking to her.

She had not naturally been inclined towards sports.

Certainly not when she'd been sick.

She must have forced herself.

But her efforts had backfired.

Made things worse.

The better Senjougahara did, the more perfect she managed to be,
the more convinced her mother was it was all the cult's influence.

And the final result...

In her third year of junior high.

With graduation looming just ahead.

She'd joined the cult for her daughter, but her priorities had grown
so out of whack she offered up her daughter to one of the cult's
leaders. Perhaps she even thought it was for her daughter's own
good.

Senjougahara fought back.

The cleat's spikes drew blood on the leader's forehead.

And the result...

...destroyed their family.

Ruined them.

Everything was taken away from her.

Money, house, land. Huge loans were taken out.

The divorce was finalized last year, she said; she'd moved to that
apartment with her father when she started high school. Everything
was over before she graduated junior high.

Over.

And...

In the interval, the space between junior and senior high...

...she met the crab.

"A crab of burden (omoshi kani) actually means a god (omoishi kami)
of," Oshino explained, "thoughts, feelings (omoi), and bonds
(shigarami). You could say that losing your weight is like you're no
longer really there. When something traumatic happens, people's
minds seal away the memories -- you see it all the time in movies or
TV. It basically works the same way; the god takes what's troubling
you away."

In other words, when she met the crab...

She severed her bonds with her mother.

She stopped thinking about how her mother had offered her to the
cult leader, how she had not saved her, how this had destroyed
their family. She stopped wondering if she should have let it
happen.

She set down her burden.

She lost what weighed her down.

She chose...

...to hide it.

She needed some respite.

"A simple trade. An even exchange. Crabs have all that armor,
they're pretty tough, right? We think they are, anyway. Got a shell
on the outside. Protect what really matters in that exoskeleton.
Blowing bubbles. Can't eat them easily."

He really seemed to hate them.

Oshino could get oddly hung up on things.

"The kanji for crab is understanding over insect. Same

understanding as in the word for dissection. Anything living in the
water gets classified that way in kanji, but these ones have two big
claws."

In the end...

Senjougahara lost her burden -- her weight and her feelings. She
was freed from suffering, no longer tormented. She threw it all
away.

And this...

...made things much easier.

It really had.

Without her burden, she had no real problems. But like the boy who
sold his shadow, there was never a day that went by when
Senjougahara did not regret it.

Not because she did not get along with other people.

Not because her life had few luxuries remaining.

Not because she no longer made friends.

Not because she'd lost everything.

Simply because she had lost her feelings.

Five con artists.

None of them had anything to do with her mother's religion, but

like Oshino, she'd only half trusted them...but the fact that she
trusted them at all shows how much she regretted it. The fact that
she kept going to the hospital did as well.
All wrong.

I'd been wrong about everything.

Ever since she lost her weight, Senjougahara...

...had not given up on anything.

...had not tossed aside anything.

"She didn't do anything wrong. Just because something bad

happens doesn't mean you have to face it. Facing it doesn't make
you better. Running away is always a valid option. Especially with
a mother that abandoned her in favor of her religion. Given the
circumstances, recovering her burden won't change anything. Only
difference is her burden weighs on her again. Her mother won't
come home, and her family won't recover."

It changed nothing.

Oshino did not say this to mock, was not being sarcastic.

"A crab of burden takes your weight, takes your memories, takes
your identity. But it isn't like vampires or the sex cat. She chose this
fate, and it was granted to her. A fair exchange. The god was always
with her. She never once lost anything. And yet..."

And yet...

Even then.

All the more.

Senjougahara Hitagi wanted it back.

Wanted it all back.

Everything she remembered about her mother.

Her memories, and the pain they caused her.

I could not really know what that meant, and I would probably
never know, but like Oshino said, little would come of it. Her
mother would not come back to them. Senjougahara would suffer
more than ever.

It changed nothing.

"It does change something," Senjougahara said.

Her eyes red and swollen.

"It was not a complete waste. If nothing else, I've found a good
friend."

"Who?"

"You."

I knew the answer. But I was taken aback by how simple, direct,
and unembarrassed she was about it.

"Thank you, Araragi-kun. I am very grateful to you. I apologize for

anything I've said or done. I'd be happy if you'd continue to be my
friend."

Despite myself...

This unexpected sentiment sank deep into my heart.

We'd promised to eat crab together.

Winter seemed a long way away.

008

And the next day, the punch line.

My two sisters, Karen and Tsukihi, beat me awake as usual. My

body felt sluggish. I forced myself out of bed. It seemed harder than
usual. My muscles ached, like I had a fever. This wasn't like
Hanekawa's incident; I hadn't done any grappling or running, so I
hadn't done anything to strain my muscles, but each step hurt. I
made it down the stairs, but nearly toppled down them instead. My
mind was clear, and it wasn't flu season, so what was going on?

I thought about it, and an impossible idea tugged at my brain.

I took a turn into the bathroom.

And stepped onto the scale.

My weight was 55 kilo.

But what the scale displayed is 100 kilo.

"...Seriously?"

Like he'd said...

Gods are pretty out of it.

 Mayoi Snail

001

I happened to meet Hachikuji Mayoi on the fourteenth of May, and

it was Sunday. Nationwide it was Mother's Day. No matter if you
loved your mother or hated your mother, no matter if you are on
good terms with her or on bad, as long as you're a Japanese citizen
you are given equally the right to enjoy Mother's Day. Well, I
suppose Mother's Day originates from the U.S.A. That probably
should make you wonder if Christmas, Halloween, Valentine's
etcetera go in the same line like that, too, but anyway, fourteenth of
May was the day boasting top carnation expenditure recorded
among the year's three hundred sixty five days, the day when all at
the same time in families all over, "Shoulder Rub Coupon" and
"Helping with Chores Coupon" were being used. Wait, I'm not sure
whether that custom is still around or not, either way, it was
fourteenth of May, dubbed Mother's Day of that year.

It was that day.

That day, 9am in the morning.

I was sitting on a bench of an unfamiliar park. Gazing like a fool

upon a foolishly blue sky, without anything to do in particular,
sitting on a bench in an unfamiliar park. Moreover, I didn't even
care where this place was, all I knew was this was, a park.

Park , read the gate.

If you asked me whether that's spelled "Namishiro", or "Rouhaku",

or something completely different, I wouldn't know. The origin of
the name, well, again obviously, I wouldn't know. Of course
nothing would change if I knew. Not like there's a problem with
that. I've come here without any fixed goal in mind, I just randomly
moved where I felt like going, where my legs led me, riding a
mountain bike, and ended up in that park, and that's all there was
to it, okay?

There is a difference in visiting and arriving with this place.

But other than me, there probably isn't any difference.

My bike was parked at the parking lot near the front of the gate.

In the parking lot, being neglected, exposed to winds and rained on

too much, you just couldn't be sure if it were bicycles or piles of
rust, there were two such things there, and other than that no other
bikes other than my mountain bike have been parked there. In cases
like this a man would perceive deeply the vanity of riding one's
mountain bike upon an asphalt-covered road, but, hey, that was a
vanity you could perceive at any time, without it being a case like
this.

The park was pretty broad.

However that being said, it was simplistic and poor as for equipped
playgrounds, so it probably just felt that way. It only looked spacey.
A swing in a corner and a cat's brow-sized sandbox was all; no see-
saw, no jungle gym, not even a slide. To me, a high-schooler in his
third year, this park place could have become a nostalgia-inspiring
location, but, surely enough, I couldn't help feeling the opposite.

But, why was it so empty, probably because of that kind of reason.

Maybe it was that sort of place where the playgrounds were
deemed potentially traumatic for children and rendered safe so the
equipment once installed was removed and so it was like that? Even
so, my initial thoughts wouldn't have changed, but I think, speaking
of that, swings definitely should be the most dangerous, but,
anyway, this kind of thing is unrelated to me, towards the miracle
that I have a normal body without any deficiency, it's not like I
never had such an experience.

I surely was pushing my luck a lot when I was a child.

That's what I thought, with a feeling different from nostalgia.

But.

The me on the fourteenth of May, from a month and a half ago

since, I already had lost the body you could call normal-- the
sentiment ingrained in my heart still couldn't quite catch up with
the reality of that. Seriously, that wasn't something you get over in a
few months. I was probably never going to.

But, I thought.

Even taking the scarceness of playgrounds into consideration, the

park felt unduly lonely. Indeed, there's not a single person here but
me. Today was supposed to be a Sunday all over the country. Of
course the park lacked in playgrounds, but in such a broad place,
kids could be playing baseball with a ball of rubber and a plastic
bat, I think. Or, is it that grade-schoolers these days already don't
play baseball, or the next-popular soccer?. Probably they're just
playing video games at home--or busy attending cram school
maybe? Or the neighbourhood children might spend the day for the
sake of Mother's Day, being all good kids.

Either way, this Sunday park seemed like I was here alone, as
though I was alone in the whole world--go pick any exaggeration at
that extent, because it really seemed like I was the owner of the
place. I felt like I was free to never go home again. Because it is just
me, just one person here... hm. Wait, actually, there is one. Not just
me. Cutting straight across the open space from my bench, in a
corner of the park, by the metal billboard with a map--the nearby
residential area on it--there was a grade-schooler examining it. I
can't tell what she is like just from her back. The impression she had
was the large rucksack she wore. For a second I felt like I'd found a
pal and my mind loosened vaguely, but, said grade-schooler, after
spending some time staring at the map, seemed like she
remembered something, and left the park behind. Then I became
alone.

Not again, I thought.

...Onii-chan, you... I suddenly got reminded of my little sister's

words.

The words tossed casually after me as I rode my mountain bike

from home.

...Onii-chan, that's why you are...

Yeah.

Oh darn, I muttered as I changed my pose where I was looking up

at the sky to another, where I was staring at one point on the
ground, my head between my hands.

A dark mood comes flooding over me, much like a tidal wave.

I was looking up, pretty calm and and relaxed, and this time I feel
petty and hate myself for that. Self-loathing is probably the right
word--normally, I'm not the sort to brood, I'm not the sort whose
head the word "anguish" ever crosses, but, ever so seldom, like on
the fourteenth of May, yeah, on such eventful days I often come
down to this condition for some reason. Special situations, unique
settings. I'm really damn sensitive to those. I lose my relaxedness. I
even feel like fleeing.

Sigh, normal days are the best.

Please let it be tomorrow.

So, from this rare condition--a snail-related episode began. Looking

back at it, if I had not been like that, the whole episode might not
have even started.

002

"Oh my, look at this! I thought somebody had left a dead dog lying
on a park bench, and it was just you, Araragi-kun."

Feeling like I had just heard a greeting so novel it could as well have
just become first ever endeavoured throughout the history of man, I
raised my eyes from the ground to discover my classmate
Senjougahara Hitagi there.

Obviously, as it was Sunday, she wasn't wearing her uniform. I'd

thought I had something to say in regard to being called a dead dog
right off, but as I saw her in plain clothes, and moreover, having
that straight hair she would always leave hanging during school
bound in a ponytail, that fresh visage of Senjougahara made me
swallow my words that had been well on their way to my tongue
and out.

Wow...
Definitely not so exposed, her breast was strangely emphasised in
the upper part--and the culotte skirt of a length unthinkable for the
usual school clothes. You couldn't even call that a skirt, and the
black stockings were even more captivating than bare legs.

"What now? I just said hi. I was kidding. Don't make a seriously
daunted face, if you please. Isn't your sense of humour positively
lacking, Araragi-kun?"

"Ah, uh, well..."

"Or, what, was it that our naive Araragi-kun got fascinated by my

so charming usual clothes and had his moment of felicity?"

"..."

Her expression was like after a bad pun, but anyway, as she hit the
bull's eye, or anyhow really close to the truth of what I was feeling, I
couldn't quite call up a good riposte.

"By the way, the part of 'fascinated' is quite a word. Did you
know? You write 'grass crown' over 'hot water'(). So inside me, in
the bright sunshine() by the grass crown, the moe() goes up a
notch, shouldering the future generation itself which grass
symbolises, a sensitive word like that that gathers expectations on
me. You can also coin up pretties like maidinated, or cat-
earcinated."

"...Your clothes have a really different impression from the usual, so

I was surprised. That's all."

"Oh, that may be so. Back then I was wearing my milder clothes,
you see."
"Really? Heh."

"That said, however, this set, top and bottom, is something I just
bought yesterday. To celebrate my recovery partially."

"Recovery..."

Senjougahara Hitagi.

A girl from my class.

Until just recently, she had been dealing with a certain problem.
That problem, until just recently--and ever since she entered high
school.

For more than two years.

Incessantly.

Because of that problem she never made friends, she could touch
nobody, she was leading a torturous school life not unlike being
locked in a prison cell--but, happily, the problem faced its basic
solution last Monday. I took a part in solving it, too--me and
Senjougahara have a long history of neighbouring desks in the same
class throughout the first, the second, and this, third year, but that
time was the first we actually talked. As well as the first time you
can say a connection was born between me and her, who had
seemed quiet and smart, so beautifully weak and frail and sickly.

The problem was solved.

Solved.
That said, looking from Senjougahara's perspective, the problem she
had been walking along for years hadn't been all that simple, of
course--it had been bad enough that Senjougahara has been
skipping school until Saturday, yesterday. Apparently she spent
that time in a hospital undergoing an examination or maybe a
work-up.

Then yesterday.

She was freed from all that.

Apparently.

After all.

Or, on the contrary, at last.

Or, the other way, finally.

"Well, although I said so, the root of the problem is in no way fixed,
so to me, it's a touchy matter whether to just let it go and be happy
or not."

"The root of the problem--hm."

Yeah, her problem wasn't the sort that just gets solved.

But there aren't many phenomena you call problems out there
which are the sort, it seems--because things end first, and the true
face of what you call problems is how we interpret it later.

Same goes for Senjougahara's case.

Same goes for mine.

"Don't mind it. It's fine with just me brooding over it."

"Heh. Well, yeah."

That was true.

True, for both of us.

"Yes. Absolutely. Also, that means I am happy as much as I have the

sanity to brood."

"...The way you said that implies there's somebody somewhere

who's unhappy not even having the sanity to brood."

"Araragi-kun is stupid."

"So you said it directly!"

Ignoring the context completely, too.

So you just want to say I'm stupid by that...

It's been almost a week, yet there's no change in her.

Although she probably did gain some curve.

"But I'm glad," Senjougahara said with a faint smile. "I was just
going to get accustomed to the clothes, but first of all I wanted you
to see me wearing it."

"...Hmm?"

"Because solving my problem allowed me to choose my fashion

freely, see. Now I can wear any clothes, whatever they may be,
without a limit."
"Ah... Guess you can."

Unable to choose clothes.

That was one of Senjougahara's problems, as well.

At her age when she would want to look good.

"So you wanted to show off to me first, well, uhh, Providence is

favourable... Anyway, really nice of you."

"It's not 'show off', Araragi-kun. I wanted you to see it. The nuance
is completely different between those!"

"Really..."

Though, she was having me see more intense clothes than those
"milder" on Monday... However, the clothes she was wearing now,
with an exceeding emphasis on the breast, were thoroughly, surely,
charming enough to actually keep my eyes firmly nailed in. Her
taste was probably to blame that I felt attracted as though by a
powerful magnet. She was giving herself out as a sickly girl, but,
quite in opposition to those words, I couldn't deny a positive
inclination in her. Since she'd tied her hair up, the upper body line
became apparent. Especially around her breast--uh, why am I
talking about her breast all the time... It's not even that exposed... or
rather, considering the middle of May and her wearing a long-
sleeve jacket and long stockings, quite underexposed, but, well,
exotic. Why, what does that mean? Maybe the case of Senjougahara
Hitagi which took place on Monday and then the case of the class
rep, Hanekawa Tsubasa which took place during the Golden Week
have both empowered me to feel more eroticism in a dressed
woman rather than naked or wearing lingerie...
That sucks...

I don't need that sort of power at the high school stage...

And thinking calmly, giving an eye like this to a classmate girl is a

simple rudeness, in my opinion. It felt like I was hard at work
embarrassing myself.

"By the way, Araragi-kun. Just what in the world are you doing
here? Have you grown a habit of skipping classes while I was on
my leave? And you can't talk to your parents about that, so you
pretend you're attending, and really killing time in this park or
something... If that is the case, it would feel like what I was fearing
happened at last!"

"Sounds like I'm some downsized pops..."

And it's Sunday today.

Mother's Day, too.

That I had wanted to mention, but gave up just the moment before.
Senjougahara lives with her father for certain reasons. As for her
mother, she was in a hairy situation. It's probably worse to over-
analyse my own words like this than not, but it's still not something
I should mention freely, I guess. The words "Mother's Day" shall be
taboo for Senjougahara from now on.

Neither did I--

Neither did I want to go deeper in that direction.

"Not really. Just killing time."

"A man who can answer 'killing time' when asked what he's doing
isn't worth much as a rumour has it. Although, I would rather that
notion had had no relation to Araragi-kun."

"...I'm touring around."

By bike, I added.

Senjougahara listened, nodded with a curious "hmm", and turned

towards the park entrance. Right where the bike parking lot was.

"So, that bicycle was yours?"

"Hm? Yeah."

"It was so rusted you'd think it were iron oxide coating, its chain
broken and in pieces, and there was no saddle nor the handle bar, it
is a wonder a bicycle like that can still move."

"Not that one!"

That's the dumped bicycle.

"Aside from two bicycles like that, there was the cool one, right?
The red one! That's mine!"

"Hm... Ahh. That mountain bike."

"Yeah, that."

"MTB."

"Heh. Yeah."

"MIB."
"No."

"Hmm. Oh, it's you, Araragi-kun! Anyway, it's weird then. Its build
is quite different from what I rode with you, I think."

"That one's for school. Like I'd ride a granny bike out of hobby."

"That figures. Because you're a high-schooler..." Senjougahara nods,

humming in agreement knowingly. "High school, mountain bikes."

"You're saying it like there's more to it..."

"High school, mountain bikes. Middle school, butterfly knives.

Grade school, skirt-lifting."

"What is that ominous sequence supposed to mean!?"

"Without conjunctions or adjectives, you can't tell if it's ominous or

not, can you? Don't yell baseless conclusions at a girl, Araragi-kun.
Intimidation is a form of violence, you know that?"

And verbal abuse is not?

Which I won't say, though, because it'd be of no use...

"Okay, try adding conjunctions and adjectives."

"High school having mountain bikes is more improbable than

middle school's butterfly knives or grade school's skirt-lifting."

"So you aren't going to keep on topic, are you!"

"Oh you, Araragi-kun! You were supposed to point out that

"having" is neither a conjunction nor an adjective, but a verb in
present participle tense, right?"
"Who'd tell that right off from what you washed me with!"

That's the school's top scorer for you.

Or is it actually just me not knowing...

Literature isn't my cup of tea.

"You know, lay off me. It's not even like I like mountain bikes so
much, and it's too late anyhow, so I decided I'd be more patient
about your verbal abuse. Or not patient, flexible. But there're 50,000
highschoolers riding mountain bikes all over the world, right? So
you're willing to set them all against you?"

"The mountain bike is really great. A gem for every high-schooler to

admire."

Senjougahara Hitagi in Turn Back on Old Times.

Uncharacteristically wise in self-protection.

"As the sort of greatness shown was not anything like Araragi-kun,
I just ended up saying something ad lib."

"And shifted the responsibility..."

"Oh jeez, you like nitpicking, don't you? If you want to get
murdered that much, I'll give you half of that any time."

"I'll claim cruel treatment!"

"Araragi-kun, do you come around here often?"

"You're sure quick to getting back to the track. Okay, no, it's the first
time, I guess. I was just riding my bike, and there was a small park,
so I was just taking a rest."

Frankly speaking, it felt farther away--I thought I had just legged on

all the way to Okinawa, but the fact that I happened to bump into
Senjougahara nonchalantly, obviously enough, means that just by
bike, I can't even get out of the town I live in. Like a ranch cow.

Sigh.

Maybe I should get a licence.

But that's after graduating, eh.

"What about yourself? You mentioned getting accustomed, well,

does that mean rehab walks?"

"I mentioned getting accustomed to my clothes. You, being a boy,

probably don't do that? You still would walk around to get used to
shoes, at least. Well, let's just call it going for a walk, yes."

"Heh."

"This place used to be my territory a long time ago."

"..."

Her territory...

"Ahh. That's right, you moved during the second year. So, you used
to live around here before that?"

"Well, I did."
So she did.

Aha--that means it's not just a simple walk, nor just getting
accustomed to clothes, but in actuality, as her problem has been
solved, she was feeling nostalgic, too. So she could be humane, as
well.

"It's been a while, though, and this place--"

"What? Did you mean to say, hasn't changed at all?"

"No, the opposite. It's changed completely," she instantly replied.

So her stroll must be over in a way.

"It isn't really like I would become sentimental on that much--yet,

when it is your former home, and it changes, you just feel your
motivation abate for no reason in particular."

"Can't change, don't bother, right?"

I've been growing up around the same place all the time, though, so,
frankly, I couldn't feel for her at all. And I don't have what they call
"home town" someplace country, either...

"True. You can't change it," without a fitting rebuke, which wasn't
like her, Senjougahara said. It's seldom that she wouldn't backlash
on anything like a personal opinion. Or, she could have thought
that talking to me about it would solve nothing.

"Say, Araragi-kun. As it's come to this, would you mind me over

there?"

"What do you mean?"

"I'd like to talk to you."

"..."

The way she said that was really frank.

Her intentions, simple and clear.

Direct, right to the point.

"Sure. I've occupied a four-person bench alone, so I was beginning

to feel guilty somewhat."

"Oh. Then I'll do that."

So said Senjougahara as she sat beside me.

About as close as our shoulders touched.

"..."

Ehh... Why would she, on a bench for four, sit as if it's for two...?
That's a bit too intimate, Senjougahara-san. Just at the brink of, well,
two bodies touching, not quite, but any minute gesture would
suffice--this really fine balance is, us being classmates, or rather
even friends, just a tad bit really minutely fine, it seemed. Still, if I
were to try and distance myself away now, it could leave the
impression as though I were avoiding Senjougahara. Should she
have thought about it that way, even though I wouldn't have meant
that, just thinking of what persecution Senjougahara would unleash
on myself was easily enough for me, for one, to not move a muscle.
As a result--I froze in place.

"It's about the recent events."

In a situation like this, in communicating positions like this.

Senjougahara said in a level tone.

"I thought I should once again say thanks."

"...Oh. It's nothing, really, I don't mind. Thinking back, I haven't

served any purpose there."

"True. You haven't even served as garbage."

"..."

It tecnhically was the same thing, but the expression was crueler.

Actually, this woman is cruel.

"Then go say thanks to Oshino. I think that'll do."

"Oshino-san is a different story. That and Oshino-san provided that

I am to pay him for work. 100,000 yen, was it?"

"Yeah. You were going to part-time?"

"I was. That said, however, my personality isn't good for labouring,
so I'm still at the stage of taking measures to work around that."

"Being aware of yourself is a better thing than not."

"It's not something I could just trample over..."

"So you were working around that."

"I was kidding you. I'm serious about money. Well, this makes
Oshino-san stand apart from this--there you go. Now, I would like
you, Araragi-kun, in a way different from Oshino-san's, to accept
my gratitude."

"Well, you've essentially said it, so enough about me. 'Cause if you
keep repeating words, no matter how sincere, their meaning
decreases."

"Oh, I didn't mean it from the start."

"So you didn't!?"

"Just kidding. I did mean it."

"You're chock full of jokes, huh?"

I was chock full of frustration.

Ahem, Senjougahara cleared her throat.

"I'm so sorry. It's just, whenever you tell me anything, I just can't
help rebuking it, wanting to cross it."

"..."

What's the point in adding that after an "I'm sorry"?...

I just felt like she said, "We're incompatible."

"I'm sure it's, well, you know? You're likely to bully somebody
you're keen on. It might be that kind of a childish mental state."

"Nah, more like you're likely to torment somebody weak, that kind
of a big adult's mental state..."

Hm?
Did Senjougahara just call me somebody she's keen on?

Ah, no, that's a figure of speech...

Thinking that every girl that smiles at you is also into you, like a
middle schooler would, isn't really sensible (smiles are free), so I get
back to the topic.

"Well, actually, I don't even think anyone did anything for you
that'd make you feel this obliged, and, as Oshino would say, you
'just saved yourself alone', so to me, all the obligations and what not
aren't worth mentioning. They just complicate relationships in the
long run."

"Relationships..." Senjougahara repeated in the absolutely same

intonations. "I-- Araragi-kun. Does that mean I may think of you as
someone close?"

"Huh? Sure."

We're as good as those each with a problem that they had faced and
revealed to each other. This isn't the stage of "unrelated" any more,
much less "just classmates" by now, I guess.

"Oh... Yes, we're as good as those who learned each other's

weaknesses."

"Eh?... Our relationship had that tension?"

That's got to get cold...

"Just think it's not about weaknesses, but that we just naturally got
closer... That would be right, no? Then I'll do the same."
"But Araragi-kun, you don't seem the type to have many friends."

"That used to be true up to the last year. Types aside, that was my
motto. I just happened to have a paradigm shift during spring
break... And you?"

"For me it used to be until last Monday."

So Senjougahara says.

"If you want more--until I met Araragi-kun."

"..."

What's up with her...

Actually, what's up with this situation...

It's just like Senjougahara's about to confess to me... It's too hard to
breathe, too meaningful a silence, well... I feel like I'm not braced for
it. Had I known things would come to this, I would have picked
better clothes, combed my hair...

No, wait!

Agh, now I'm awfully embarrassed of myself, beginning to

seriously think of getting confessed to! Also, as I was thinking about
that, why have my eyes ended up on Senjougahara's breast!? Was I
this predictable!? Was Araragi Koyomi a man so shallow as to make
decisions about a girl based on her looks (her breasts)?...

"What's wrong, Araragi-kun?"

"Uh, um... I'm really sorry."

"About what?"

"My thoughts made me realise my existence was a sin..."

"I see. A sinful bastard, are you?"

"..."

Na.

Once again, it meant the same but had the wrong nuance.

"In short, Araragi-kun..." Senjougahara said, "whatever you say, I

think I'd like to pay returns to you. Otherwise, I think I'll always be
feeling something like a weakness with you. If we want to improve
our relationship, it's after we're through that and capable of being
friends on equal terms."

"Friends..."

Friends.

Why...

It's supposedly a touching idea, no matter how you look at it, yet, as
I had excess expectations, I feel down inside, how do I put this--it's
like something was disappointed inside me...

No, that's not quite it...

That's really not the case...

"What is it, now, Araragi-kun? I'm sure I said something rather cool
for myself, yet your expression is despaired."
"It's not, it's not. Upon having learned you were thinking that way I
feel like dancing a French cancan which I'm desperately trying to
suppress, so it may look diametric."

"Oh."

She nodded, apparently satisfied.

She probably thought I had ulterior motives.

"Well then. Either way--Araragi-kun. Is there anything you want me

to do? I'll do any one thing you tell me to."

"A-any?"

"Any."

"Right..."

A girl of the same age just told me she'd do anything for me.

It felt like reaching an unexpected achievement.

...

But I'm adamant she knows what she's saying.

"I'm serious, anything. Whatever you wish--I'll grant it for you.

World domination, eternal life, wish to defeat Saiyans soon to come
on Earth, whatever."

"Does that mean you've got more power than Shn Lng!?"

"Sure does."
She affirmed it.

"I would rather you didn't think I would at such a dire moment not
only turn out useless, but even turn to the enemy side. ...Well, yes, I
would prefer a more individual wish, true. Something simpler."

"Figures..."

"Are you, naturally as it is, confused by me suddenly saying that?

Then, you could go with the usual, as well. In this situation, there
are a few oft-used standard wishes. Like, 'I wish you grant me a
hundred wishes'."

"Eh? Does that work? Are you all right with it?"

In this situation, the oft-used standard wish would be about doing

something shameless and very tabooish, no?

And she said that herself.

That's just asking for it.

"Just tell me anything. I'd like you to have me do something as long

as I can. Like keep ending sentences with "-nyu" for a week, or
attend school wearing no underwear for a week, or follow an enema
diet for a week, I'm sure you have your preferences."

"Damn, what's that level of maniacal fetishism to assume of me!?

I'm forgiving, but that's just too rude!"

"Ah... no, I'm really sorry, but I don't think I could keep up for my
whole life..."
"It's the other way! I'm not angry because you underestimated the
level of my mania!"

"Oh, really."

Senjougahara's face was that of a Buddha.

She's got me completely around her finger...

"Actually, Senjougahara, you sure you would swallow stupid

desires like those?..."

"I'm that resolved."

"..."

That's a resolve you'd do better without.

"As part of brainstorm, I'd personally recommend having me wake

you up while wearing nothing but an apron every day. I'm good at
getting up early, too, actually, it's long my habit. Heck, I could cook
you a breakfast while I'm at it, too. While wearing just an apron, of
course. Isn't it the very man's spirit to enjoy the sight from behind?"

"Don't toss expensive words like 'man's spirit' around like that!
Man's spirit is greater, cooler than that! And, if done in a family
environment, that's going to ruin said family at the maximum
instantaneous wind speed!"

"Sounds like you wouldn't mind if not for the family. Well, care to
try living at my place for a week? Although it's effectively the same
thing, I suppose."
"Listen, Senjougahara." I finally mustered up the will to have her do
something. "Even if that kind of negotiation were to reach
conclusion, I don't think our friendship would be possible
afterwards."

"Ah. That is true, now that you mention it. Yes, that's right. Let us
cross out the sexual content."

Okay, fair enough.

Wait, was having her say "-nyu" sexual for Senjougahara?... She's
sure got pretty special tastes for her deadpan style, there.

"But I did not think you would have wishes of sexual content, either
way."

"Oh, that's a serious trust."

"Because you're a virgin."

"..."

We've had that discussion before, have we not?

Oh yeah, last week.

"Virgins are good to deal with because they aren't too greedy."

"Uh... Senjougahara. Wait a second there. You have been saying

every sort of thing about my virginity like that, but aren't you
without any particular experience, either? The way you still say it
I'm not, uh, impressed..."

"Oh please. I do have experience."

"Oh, really?"

"Heaps of it."

So Senjougahara said without twitching a brow.

She... really likes rebuking anything I say, regardless...

That "heaps of it" expression included.

"You know what... I'm not sure how to put it, but what if, just let's
assume for a second that you really did, then what good is there in
it for you to be telling me that fact?"

"...Hmm."

Blushed.

Was what I did, though, not Senjougahara.

I've so had enough of this conversation.

"Okay... Here's your correction," Senjougahara soon said. "I have, no

experience. I'm a virgin."

"...Sigh."

A confession being such, it still was one load of a confession.

Then again, she forced me to say it right out, too, so that's a fair
deal.

"Which means!" Senjougahara firmly rambles on, sticking her index

finger out at me, yelling out at me in a strong voice almost echoing
within the park. "Nobody would talk to an uncool virgin freak like
Araragi-kun, but a late-to-get-married mentally unstable virgin
such as myself!"

"...!"

She... regards abusing me so highly she's ready to disparage

herself...

In a way, she has my hat off before her; in a way, she has my white
flag out.

All-fronts capitulation.

Well, with Senjougahara's high morals and rigorous demeanour, the

last week's events must have left her feeling so keenly hurt it could
become traumatic; thus, in this case of all, it's wiser not to dig in too
deep; because for her, this could have by now become less of a
personality and more of a pathology.

"But we digress," Senjougahara said to me, back with her calm

voice. "Really, isn't there anything, Araragi-kun? Something simple,
like helping you out with something."

"Helping me out--hmm."

"I'm a poor talker, and I can't really phrase it, but believe me, I want
to be of use to you."

No, I don't think you're a poor talker.

I even think you're blabbering too much--but hey, Senjougahara

Hitagi...

Doesn't--seem inherently bad.

And those needlessly crossed-out wishes, well.

This isn't the situation to wickedly and triflingly come up with

filthy wishes.

"Or like telling you how to stop being a recluse."

"I'm not shutting myself away. In what world do recluses have

freakin' mountain bikes?"

"You don't know for sure that no recluse has one, do you. Just
because somebody is a recluse, you still can't impose your
prejudices on him, Araragi-kun. He may take the wheels off and
pedal all the time indoors."

"As in an aerobic bike?"

That is a healthy shut-away.

Provided he exists.

"But I can't instantly think of anything I'm having troubles with."

"That might be true. Your hair doesn't look like you just woke up
today."

"Does that mean the worst of my worries would be a curl in my

hair!?"

"Don't over-analyse. Your guilty conscience is surprisingly strong...

Araragi-kun, there isn't that much written between these lines, you
know?"

"How else am I supposed to interpret that..."

Darn.

She is like a rose, whose very petals have thorns.

"I think I could also help with problems like that girl who's kind to
everyone in class but yourself."

"So cruel!"

As long as I don't tell her to do something, even against my will,

this development of events threatens to last for all eternity.

Sigh...

I've had quite enough.

"Alright... My trouble, eh... Well, I won't vow this is something that

really bothers me, mind you."

"Oh. There was something!"

"Everybody has something."

"I'm listening, what is it?"

"You look decisive."

"Well duh! This is the brink of whether I can return the favour to
you or not. Or is it something hard to mention to others?"

"No, it's not..."

"Then say it! Talking about it makes it easier on you--or so they

say."
...

You, formerly the most secretive person I've met, saying so doesn't
really add to the verity of that.

"I, uh... had a fight with my sister."

"...Doesn't sound like I could help."

There you got a woman real quick to give up.

I just started, damn it...

"But finish the story, just in case."

"In case!..."

"Then, finish the story the first thing."

"That's about the same thing."

"Thing is, the thing with first things is, any first thing you say goes
first."

"...... Ahh, okay, yeah."

I just swore to never say that.

But, well, not with where we were going.

"You know, it's Mother's Day today."

"Hm? Oh, indeed it was." Senjougahara nodded in a common

manner.
I guess I was worrying too much about her.

Meaning that the rest is--my problem.

"So, which sister did you have a fight with? I reckon you had two,
right?"

"Yeah, so you knew? More with the older one--but really, it was,
like, both. Whatever, wherever, when-, why and however they do it,
they do it together, perfectly snug."

"They're the Two Fire Sisters of Tsuga Tree, after all."

"You even know their nickname..."

I don't like that for some reason.

Though I like my sisters having a popular nickname even less.

"Both of them stick to Mum as well--so she treats them as kittens,

pets them and all. So--"

"I see," Senjougahara interrupts me, as if to show she has reached

full consent. She wouldn't wait for me to finish speaking, almost not
wanting to hear too much. "The dull first son, on today being the
very Mother's Day, is out-of-place in his own home."

"...That about covers it."

With the dull first son part being supposedly usual abusive
rambling for Senjougahara, but also being a non-hyperbolic non-
anything fact, I couldn't help but admit it.

Not to mention being out-of-place.

I did feel uncomfortable there.

"And so, you've been touring this far off. Heh. Still, I don't
understand. How did that turn into a fight with your sisters?"

"Back early in the morning, I was sneaking out, and when I saddled
the bike, my sisters caught me. An argument ensued."

"An argument?"

"Apparently they wanted to celebrate Mother's Day with me, but--

well, look, I just can't help it, so there."

"You can't, huh. So there, eh."

Senjougahara repeated after me meaningfully.

Or she wanted me to think again.

Just how much luxury my troubles were.

Given Senjougahara's father-and-kid family--it was probably that.

"It often happens that a middle school girl would hate her father--
would a boy not be able to bear being with his mother in the same
way?"

"Sigh... No, not that I can't bear being around her, nor do I hate her,
but it feels, uh, awkward, well, since I have younger sisters, they're
the same, mostly--"

That's what being the older brother means.

That's why every time things go the way they do--

"...But eh, Senjougahara. That's not the problem. Fights with sisters,
Mother's Day and all are fine with me per se--not just today, it
happens every event-ish day, somehow. It's just..."

"Just what?"

"Look. I could mention a lot of things, like I can't go celebrate just

one Mother's Day, or that I get all-out angry at what my sisters four
years younger than me tell me, all that stuff is, well, things showing
how petty a human I am, no matter how that pisses me off, there's
no helping it."

"Heh--that's a complex trouble," Senjougahara says. "You go all

around, and your trouble goes meta. Something like the goose and
egg problem."

"The egg was first, by the way."

"Oh, really?"

"It's not complex, just miniature. Like, alas, I'm a petty human! But,
still, when I think I'd have to apologise to my younger sisters, I
suddenly really don't care about going home. Feels like I could just
live in this park forever."

"So you don't care about going home--hm." Senjougahara sighed.

"Regrettably, doing something about your pettiness as a human is
outside my ability..."

"..."

Yeah, she stated the obvious, but her directness and her chagrin
voice made me feel down even more. Well, it's not so deep as to
count as feeling down, but the very amount of lacking deepness of
what I felt had a bad side of its own.

"Or, 'I'm so boring'. I want to worry about world peace, or how to

keep everyone happy, if I am to worry at all. But here it is, my
worry, tiny like this. That's--what I hate."

"Tiny--"

"Or you could say 'shabby'. It's like, uh, taking a fortune cookie and
getting 'slightly good luck' all the time, that sort of shabbiness."

"You shouldn't deny your own charm, Araragi-kun."

"My what!? You mean my charm was getting 'slightly good luck' all
the time!?"

"I'm kidding. And, your shabbiness isn't like getting 'slightly good
luck' all the time."

"Let me guess, you'll tell me it's like getting 'greater bad luck'."

"Oh, no. That would be something awful...ly nice. Araragi-kun's

shabbiness is all about..." Senjougahara held a pause to add weight
to what she was going to say, then continued. "...When you get a
'great luck', but read the small text and find out the contents aren't
that lucky. That's more like it."

I masticated and ruminated upon the idea thoroughly.

"Damn shabby!" I yelled.

I've never even heard of such shabby people... And if I might add,
she made it up too well... One thing after another--or rather, one
rebuttal after another, this woman was all the more ominous.

"But disregarding your mother, the fight with your sisters may
actually be minor. Although, Araragi-kun, you're supposed to love
and pamper little sisters."

"It's fights through and through."

Even among those--today's one may fit.

But today it wasn't the usual.

"So they're uncute no matter how you look, disturbing little sisters?"

"My sisters aren't disturbing at all!"

"Or it could be the reversal of love. You, Araragi-kun, are

surprisingly into your sisters, I presume."

"No. Little sister-loving is a wild fancy of those who have none.

That's absolutely impossible in real life."

"Oh! You, who have them, sound so condescending to those who

don't, which attitude doesn't amuse me, Araragi-kun."

...

Just what does she mean?...

"People who say stuff like, "Money is not a problem~", or, "I'd rather
not have a girlfriend~", or, "Your academic background doesn't
matter~"... these haughty people. Ew."
"Little sisters don't fall into that sort of stuff..."

"So. You don't feel unbrotherly love to them. You wouldn't fall in
love with your actual little sisters."

"Who would?"

"True. You seem like a sororate type."

Solo rate?

No, I don't think that's it.

"I mean the sororate marriage. The opposite to levirate marriage,

that is to say, should your wife die, you would marry her sister."

"...An erudite as usual, you keep earning my admiration, except

why do I have to be that sororate or whatever?"

"In your case, you'll first have the daughter of a non-blood-related

woman call you "Oniichan", then marry the daughter... so she'll
keep calling you "Oniichan" even after your marriage, which is truly
the very real, original-meaning--"

"That sounds like I'll kill my first wife!"

The "straight man" comical part wasn't given to me originally, but

Senjougahara's phrase just made me react before she could finish it.

"So, sororate Araragi-kun--"

"Please, I beg you, just call me a sister-lover!"

"Well, you said you wouldn't fall in love with your actual sister."
"Not that I would fall in love with my sister-in-law, either!"

"Then, you might fall in love with your lover-in-law."

"I just said... Wha? What law handles lovers?"

What was that?

No, calling a couple "-in-law" would, on the second thought, seem

to fit, as "in-law" means duty, obligation; but what are the real
lovers called, then?... And we so digressed...

"You are tiny indeed, becoming dumbfounded at a low-level crack."

"What you're talking about is not low-level."

"Right now I was just testing you."

"Testing me for what... or, did that mean you've just been playing
the whole time!?"

"If I were going for real, I'd have transformed."

"Transformed!? Damn, I want to see that!"

No, I'm not even sure I do...

Senjougahara sighed, looking pensive.

"You overreact big-time, but you're tiny as a human... What if that's

karma-related? But, however petty a human you may be, I will not
sweep you away. I'll be there for your human-pettiness."

"That was another weird expression."

"I'll be there for you no matter what. From western peaks to eastern
seas, I'll be your solace in Hell itself should you desire."

"...Right, you know, you may sound cool saying such phrases,
just..."

"So, beside things related to your human sizes, is there anything

troubling you?"

"..."

What if she hates me?

What if I'm getting severely bullied right now?

I'd like it to be just a persecution complex...

"Still nothing comes to mind..."

"Nothing you want and nothing you're having problems with--

hmm..."

"What abuse do I get to be showered in this time?"

"You're a big guy, that's great."

"That's a forced praise, don't."

"You're exorbitantly great, Araragi-kun."

"No forced pra... Er, come again? Eggs or beat antler?"

"It's a hyperbole to "great". You didn't know?"

"I didn't... And why are you dragging expensive words around like
this just to praise me, what are you scheming?"

And she said I was a big guy, of all things... And while we've just
talked I was a petty human.

"Nothing, I just thought you might wish that I stopped my verbal

abuse for a week, so thought I'd practice ahead."

"I don't think you could, either way."

That would have been on par with telling you not to breathe, to stop
your heartbeat.

And if we suppose she would stop talking abuse for a week, that
would no more be the Senjougahara I know, and it won't be fun for
me as well--wait, why does it look like I'm becoming unable to part
with Senjougahara's poison now?

That was close...

"Okay, okay... By the way, it's amazing how you exclude sexual
content and instantly run out of ideas."

"That's true, except I had had no ideas before that restriction,

either."

"Very well, Araragi-kun. Let's say it can be just a little bit sexual. By
name of Senjougahara Hitagi, I shall agree to unseal thy desire."

"..."

Am I expected to do something, perchance?

Ahh, hyper-self-consciousness this time... That's swaying.

"Are you sure there isn't anything? Like helping you study."

"I've given up on it by now. As long as I can graduate."

"So, you want to graduate?"

"I'm sure I'll do it normally!"

"So, you want to do it normally?"

"You're just asking for it."

"So, let's see--"

Senjougahara holds a seemingly timed pause, then chooses a good

moment, and says:

"Do you want a woman?"

"..."

Is this--still hyper-self-consciousness?

That ought to be meaningful, that.

"What if I said 'yes'?.. What would happen?"

"You'd find a girlfriend," Senjougahara says with a poker face.

"That's all."

"..."

Yeah...
Though, if I think of the deeper sense of that, it's a valid phrase.

Just what the hell kind of situation is this, I really can't tell--but
whatever I pick, never mind the progress, having somebody obliged
to myself do it is, after all, not right. I don't mean anything ethical or
moral, it just doesn't feel right.

Lovers-in-law--is what we aren't, either, though.

I somehow felt I understood what Oshino once said.

Save yourself...

From Oshino's stand, what I did was--be it for Senjougahara or for

our class rep, or for that spring break woman...that vampire, it
seemed pretty but it wasn't right.

Because Senjougahara's problem got solved because of nobody else

but Senjougahara, her own sincere feelings.

In that sense--it really wouldn't be pretty.

Whoever I would rely on.

"No, nothing like that, really."

"Hmm. Okay."

Ultimately, whether there was a deeper meaning or not, and if there

was, which sort of meaning it was, all became unclear now--but
Senjougahara just said that, never showing a sign of anything
having happened.
"Okay, just buy me juice or something this time. Then we'll call it
even."

"Oh. Unselfish, are we."

You are really a big guy, Senjougahara adds in a concluding way.

Expressing her will to end the topic there.

Thus.

I turned my head up front. I felt I've spent quite a lot of time seeing
Senjougahara's face, so it was intentional, or maybe I was averting
my eyes out of discomfort, so I just looked before me--where.

Where, a girl was.

A girl carrying a huge rucksack.

003

The girl looked around nine or ten, standing in a corner of the park,
by the metal billboard with a map--the nearby residential area on it,
facing it. There she stares away from me, so I can't tell what she
looks like, but her large rucksack was pretty impressive--so, I could
remember. Indeed, this very girl had been looking at that
neighbourhood layout even before Senjougahara got here. Back
then she left soon--well, it seemed like she was back again.
Seemingly comparing the board with something like a note in her
hand.

Hmm.
I guess she is lost. I'm sure her note has a hand-drawn map or an
address written on it.

I look at her rucksack.

There is a sewn-on name sign on it--"5-3, ", denoted in

fat marker strokes.

, "early" "twilight"... should read, "Mayoi"(sounds like

"hesitation", "lost").

But ... How do you read a surname like this? "Yakudera"... or

not?

I suck at this language.

I think I'll ask somebody fluent.

"Hey, Senjougahara. Look, by that billboard, there's a grade-

schooler, right? How do you read the surname on her rucksack
name sign?"

"What?" Senjougahara said slowly. "I can't see that."

"Oh..."

True.

I just forgot.

My body is no longer normal--and yesterday, on Saturday, I let

Shinobu drink my blood. Even though it's not as bad as it used to be
during the spring break, right now I've got remarkably high
capabilities. My vision wasn't an exception. If I forget the borderline
just a little--I can see stuff across impossible distances and not
notice. That by itself not a problem, but being able to see what
nobody around can--doesn't feel particularly right.

A discord with the surroundings.

Though, that was Senjougahara's worry as well.

"Er... well, the kanji read 8, 9, and shrine..."

"...? Well, that would be Hachikuji."

"Hachikuji?"

"Yes. Can't you read kanji compounds of that level, Araragi-kun?

I'm amazed you've graduated out of kindergarten."

"You can graduate from that blindfolded!"

"You're overpricing yourself too much, I have to say."

"Finding faults in a corrective rebuttal!?"

"I am not amused by conceit."

"Now I'm amused by you..."

"Seriously, Araragi-kun, if you just had a bit of interest in history or

classic books, that is, if you were a man of intellectual curiosity, you
would have known. In your case, I feel it's a shame for life, no
matter if you ask someone or not."

"Sure, sure. So I have no education."

"If you think being aware of yourself is a better thing than not,
you're making a big mistake."

"..."

I think I have done a bad thing to her.

Because she was supposedly talking how she wanted to pay me

back, but...

"Oh you... Okay. Anyway. So that reads Hachikuji Mayoi... Heh."

That's a strange name.

Well, that said, it may be more normal than "Senjougahara Hitagi"

or "Araragi Koyomi". Anyhow, it's rather improper dissing people's
names.

"Um..." I steal a look at Senjougahara.

Hm-m.

No matter how you think of it, she's not the type to melt in front of
kids... I can imagine a ball coming rolling, and her just tossing it in
the opposite direction, though. Or kicking a crying kid away
because it's being noisy.

And so, it's easier to just go alone.

Or if it wasn't Senjougahara but somebody else, it could have been

better for the child's wariness if I went up together with a girl.

Oh well.

"Hey, could you wait a bit here?"

"Sure, but, Araragi-kun, where are you going?"

"To talk to the grade-schooler."

"Don't. You would only end up hurt."

"..."

Seriously, she says the worst things like it's nothing.

No, I'll tell her off later.

Now, the kid.

Hachikuji Mayoi.

Off the bench, I go to across the park area--to where the map stands,
and where the rucksack girl is, in a quick pace. The girl is so
desperately busy checking her note against the map, she doesn't
even notice me coming up behind her.

Leaving a step of distance between us, I call her up.

As friendly and cheerfully as possible.

"Hey. What's up, did you get lost?"

The girl turned around.

Her hairdo was twin tails and a short forelock, leaving brows
visible.

The girl's features implied intelligence.

The girl--Hachikuji Mayoi gave me a long, exploring stare, then
opened her mouth.

"Don't talk to me, please. I hate you."

"..."

...

I got back to the bench, shambling like a zombie.

Senjougahara looks curious.

"Well? What happened?"

"That hurt... I just ended up hurt..."

I took more damage than I would have thought.

Tens seconds before I've recovered.

"...I'll go once more."

"But what for, whence?"

"Obviously enough," I said.

And, to the rematch.

This Hachikuji girl was once again looking at the billboard, and it
felt like our sudden encounter had never happened. Apparently
comparing it with her note. I try looking over her shoulder--so it
wasn't a map, but an address. I'm not local so I can't recognise it,
but, well, it is around here.
"Hey, you."

"..."

"You're lost, aren't you? Where do you want to get to?"

"..."

"Let me see that note of yours for a moment."

"..."

"..."

...

I shambled back to the bench like a zombie.

Senjougahara looks curious.

"Well? What happened?"

"She ignored me... A grade school girl just didn't care..."

I took more damage than I would have thought.

Tens seconds before I've recovered.

"This time...I'll go do it."

"Araragi-kun, I'm not even sure what you want to do, or what you
are doing..."

"Never mind..." I said.

And, on to another rematch.

This Hachikuji girl is facing the billboard.

The first strike decides the battle, eh. I slapped the back of her head.
Apparently Hachikuji really hadn't seen that coming, because as a
result, she hit the billboard full-force with her open forehead.

"W,what are you doing!!"

You turned to me.

Thanks.

"Anyone would when they're hit from behind!!"

"Uh... Yeah, sorry about that." My feelings have changed due to

repeating shocks. "But you know? In the "life"() kanji, "hit"()
kanji is a part."

"What are you getting at!?"

"Life especially shines up after you get hit."

"I felt very sparky!"

"Yeah..."

I couldn't brush it off.

Too bad.

"Just that you looked troubled, and I thought I'd be able to help."
"Somebody who hits a little girl's head out of the blue and then gets
to help her does not exist in this world!! Absolutely none!!"

She was really cautious now.

Can't blame her, though.

"Ugh, so I'm sorry. I'm apologising for real! Eh, I'm Araragi
Koyomi."

"Oh, Koyomi. Oh, that's a girly name."

"..."

Way to go.

I don't get usually told that on the first meeting.

"You smell woman!! Please don't come near me!!"

"Can't let that pass from a woman, even so little, telling me that..."

Wait, wait.

Calm down, calm down.

Trust comes first--right?

Gotta soften the air a bit, or there won't be a talk.

"So, what's your name?"

"I am Hachikuji Mayoi. My name is Hachikuji Mayoi. It's a Mum

and Dad-given name which is very dear to me."
"Aha..."

Apparently, the reading was correct, but...

"Anyway, please don't talk to me! I hate you!!"

"Why is that?"

"Because you hit me from behind!"

"You already said you hated me before getting hit."

"In that case, it's karma from the previous life!!"

"That's a fresh way of being hated."

"We've been sworn enemies in our preexistence!! I was a glorious

princess, and you were the evil lord!!"

"You're getting carried off alone."

Do not follow strangers.

Ignore strangers trying to talk to you.

The times aren't pretty, and kids get such teachings drilled in down
to the bone... Or maybe it means that my looks simply aren't the sort
a kid would like.

Either way, it's depressing when a child hates you.

"Let's just calm down. I'm not meaning you harm. I just live in this
city, and I'm man or beast-friendly like no one else here, you
know?"
Okay, that was too much to say, but to deal with her, that should be
the right level of exaggeration. The best plan with kids or not is
having people think you're easy to deal with. Whether Hachikuji
has been convinced or not, she hummed in a way very fitting to her,
then said, "All right," and added, "I won't be that suspicious."

"That helps."

"Then Man-or-beast-san..."

"Man-or-beast-san!? Who is that person!?"

Oh wow...

The expression itself wasn't much, but she merely left the first half
out, and I've become some half-assed despicable creature... Sure, she
misheard, but what if it's something people mishear a lot? And I've
been using it, even calling myself that...

"He's yelling at me!! I'm scared!!"

"Look, my bad I yelled, but it's awful calling someone Man-or-beast!

Anybody would yell!"

"Really?... But, you called yourself that first. I've but complied in
due sincerity."

"The world doesn't work like anything goes as long as it's done with
sincerity... And you misheard."

Actually, the expression makes perfect sense, it's only when people
try shortening it that it begins sounding like a mutant... But
nevertheless.
"So I'm saying you mustn't shorten that expression even given you
don't understand it."

"Right. Is that so? I see. So, it must be like the word "wild"... So it's
the same thing as, whilst you accept characters who get excited and
yell, "Wild!" in a delirious voice, you can't accept a character who
would be introduced in narrative as, "He was prone to letting
himself go wild..." Isn't it?"

"I'm not sure... I, for one, really can't accept a character that would
get excited and yell, "Wild!" in a delirious voice..."

"So, how do I call you?"

"Normally would be fine, obviously."

"Very well. Araragi-san?"

"Yeah, that's normal, go normal!"

"I hate you, Araragi-san."

"..."

The air was stiff.

"You smell!! Please don't come near me!!"

"It's gotten worse than me smelling woman!?"

"Um... Indeed, "smell" may be a cruel description. I'll correct

myself."

"Yeah, if you could."

"You smell stranger!! Please don't come near me!!"

"You're incoherent, we're officially not strangers!"

"Whatever, I do not care!! Please, promptly go elsewhere!!"

"Nah... So, are you lost?"

"This isn't much of a dire situation to me!! This much trouble is

well-familiar to me!! It's a very usual thing for me!! For I'm a travel
maker!!"

"A travel agent or a troublemaker?" If that were true, it would mean

she wasn't lost, but alas. "...Wait, what are you acting all obstinate
about?"

"I am not!!"

"I can tell."

"Have at you!!"

So Hachikuji shouted as she put her weight in a high kick that hit
me. I hadn't thought a grade school girl capable of a kick like this, in
a perfect position, feeling like my spine got clubbed. However, o
hear and wail, there is an obvious difference between a grade-
schooler and a high-schooler's body length. That's a difference you
just can't step over. Hachikuji's high kick that could have well been
aimed at my face, only hit my side at most. Surely, a damage will be
taken either way if somebody lands their boot tip at your side, but
that has no "unbearable" quality. Quickly, as soon as Hachikuji's leg
hit me, I caught that leg in a hold around the ankle.
"Oh noes!" Hachikuji yells, but it's too late. ...I'll ask Senjougahara
later about how grammatically correct the "noes" was, I decided,
never letting Hachikuji, who was now standing on one foot, get any
ideas before I, much like pulling out a radish in the field, pulled her
other leg up. In jd, this was a form of one-armed shoulder throw.
In jd, though, there's a rule against holds like this one, but alas,
this is a street-fight. Hachikuji went airborne, and at the same time I
saw the insides of her skirt right before me, at quite a daring angle
too, but I, not being a pedophile, wasn't distracted this little. I jerked
her across my back.

But, our difference played the other way this time. Hachikuji was
small, and, while all it takes to hit the mat is a split-second in the air,
a guy like me would have that little distance, too--just a little.
However, in that little time, that little distance, Hachikuji could
switch her thoughts, and used a free hand to grab my hair. I was,
for a reason, growing it, so--even Hachikuji's small fingers could
easily hold the clutch. As pain ran through the skin on my head, I
let Hachikuji's ankle out of my hands.

But Hachikuji wasn't so nave as to run. Still on my back, not

waiting for touchdown, she turned, using my shoulder-blade as
pivot, and proceeded attacking my head. It was a rebuff. She hit.
However--shallowly. As her feet weren't steady, the power
conveyance wasn't normal. Differences in age, in street-fighting
experience became clear. I didn't rush with the finale; I calmed
down and could have ended the fight with a single strike right now.
Had I done that, it could have been my retaliation scene. An alley to
my triumph.

I managed to catch her arm she had hit me with--it felt like left--
wait, we're back-to-back, so it should be her right arm, so I caught
her right arm and from that stance moved on to complete the new
shoulder-throw!

This time--it worked.

Hachikuji hit the ground and was on her back.

I take my distance, accounting for a kick-back--

But it didn't look like she'd get back up.

I won.

"Damn, you stupid bitch--did you really think a grade-schooler

could beat a high-schooler! Fuhahahahahhahah!"

One could then witness a high-school boy who fought a grade-

school girl all-out, sent her over his shoulder full-force, and actually
laughed haughtily, victorious.

That is, myself.

So Araragi Koyomi was somebody capable of bullying a little girl

and laugh with joy... I got sick of myself.

"...Araragi-kun," an ice-cold voice called.

I turned around to face Senjougahara.

I think she couldn't stand watching and came over.

With an expression of utter suspicion.

"I did say I would follow you to hell, but, seeing how petty a human
you were, my, eh, pain is absolutely another thing, so don't
misunderstand me about that."

"...Please allow me to make an excuse."

"Sure."

"..."

I didn't make any.

There weren't any to be found.

So I toe the mark again.

"Well, leaving what's in the past for later, it's about her--" I point my
finger at Hachikuji, who's still there biting the dust. I mean, she fell
on her back, so not exactly, and then there's her rucksack that had
cushioned her, so she should be okay. "She must have lost her way.
I'm guessing she hasn't been with her parents or her friends, either.
Uh, I've been here, in this park, since morning, so it's been a good
while, and she was here once before you came, staring at the same
billboard. I didn't think anything about her back then, but a lot of
time passed and she came back, so she should be actually lost,
right? It's not funny if someone's waiting for her around, so I
thought I could help her."

"...Hmm."

Senjougahara nodded, which was something, but her dubious

expression didn't change. Well, I could well see she was chock full
of the question how that intention had come to blows, but I can't
really explain that. I can but say it was two warrior souls crying out
at each other.

"Oh."

"Yeah?"

"I mean, that makes sense... I understand the situation now."

I wonder about that part.

It could be she had just pretended that she did.

"Oh, yeah. Senjougahara, you mentioned you lived around here?

Then you should know the place by address, right?"

"Sure... Well, as much as anyone."

That specification didn't bode well.

I wondered if she wasn't seeing me as a child abuser perchance.

That was supposedly a step worse than even being a pedophile.

"'Ullo, Hachikuji. I know you're actually awake and playing dead or

something. Show this lady here that note of yours."

I bend and peek into Hachikuji's face.

Her eyes are white.

...She's actually unconscious...

A girl showing the whites, well that's disturbing...

"What's wrong, Araragi-kun?..."

"Nothing..."

Using my back to shield the sight from Senjougahara's eyes, I

nonchalantly slapped Hachikuji's cheeks twice, thrice. Not adding
up to the violence, naturally, but to wake her up.

Presently Hachikuji comes to.

"Ngh... I was seeing a dream of sorts."

"Aw, really? What sort of dream?" I try being very kind. "Tell me,
Hachikuji-chan. What kind of a dream was it?"

"A dream of a barbaric high school student boy abusing me."

"...Ah, isn't it a dream that means the opposite?"

"Oh. It was that kind of dream, wasn't it?"

Obviously that had been real, right before she lost consciousness.

I felt a heart-rending regret.

I took the note from Hachikuji, and handed it right to Senjougahara-

-except Senjougahara didn't move to take it. Instead, she stared at
me, her eyes colder than the freezing point of water.

"What? Take it."

"...Somehow, I don't want to touch you."

Ugh.

Her poison, which I was supposedly used to, really hit the mark...
"But you're just taking the note."

"I don't even want to touch the things you have touched."

"..."

She hates me...

Senjougahara hates me in the commonest way now...

Huhh... It's weird, it had felt surprisingly good talking with her just
recently...

"Okay, I got it, then... I'll simply read it aloud, okay? Umm..."

I read the address written on the note. Thankfully, there weren't any
ambiguous characters in it, so I was able to read it fluently.
Senjougahara heard me and said,

"Hm. I know where that is."

"That helps."

"Go past the place where I used to live then go a bit further. I'm not
sure about the precise place, but once we're there, I can feel the right
place. So, shall we go?"

No sooner said than done, Senjougahara turned on heels and

started walking towards the park gate in a large pace. I had thought
she would grumble more about how she didn't want to guide
children, but she, surprisingly, just abided--no, rather, as
Senjougahara hadn't even introduced herself to Hachikuji, hell, she
hadn't looked in Hachikuji's eyes, so, somehow, Senjougahara
hating children was probably a good prediction on my part, though.
Or, as she'd said she wanted to do "one thing" for me, it could be
she heeded my call there.

Ahh.

If that's true, it feels like a total waste...

"Oh well... Let's go, Hachikuji."

"Eh... Go where?"

Hachikuji seemed honestly puzzled.

Can't she assume things on other people talking?

"The place marked on your note, of course. That lady knows it, so
she's going to guide you. Lucky you."

"...Sigh. A guidance, then..."

"Hmm? Weren't you, like, lost?"

"Yes, I am," Hachikuji admitted clearly. "I'm a lost snail."

"What? Snail?"

"No, I--" She shook her head. "I, it's nothing."

"...Okay. Uh, so, let's just follow that lady! Her name is
Senjougahara, as in battlefield. Her crabbiness is on par with her
name, but you just get used to it, then the extremeness of it becomes
your habit, and then, deep inside, she's a comparatively frank, good
person. A bit too frank, even."

"..."
"Oh jeez. Come on..."

Hachikuji still wouldn't move, so I got firmly a hold on her hand,

and, pulling, or rather, dragging her, chased Senjougahara's back.
Hachikuji was squeaking, "Ah, auh, au, ouuou," like a seal or a sea
lion, but despite several tough moments, she managed to follow me
without falling.

I decided I'd go pick my mountain bike up later.

For now, we left the park behind.

Me still none the wiser as to how that reads.

004

I suppose its about time I talked about spring break.

Over spring break, I was attacked by a vampire.

I say attacked, but really I stuck my head where it didnt belong. In

fact, I pretty much literally stuck my head out, revealing my neck
for those sharp fangs. At any rate, in this age where science is seen
as all powerful and people think no darkness cannot be illuminated
by it, I, Araragi Koyomi, was attacked by a vampire in the back
country suburbs of Japan.

I was attacked by a beautiful demon.

Hers was blood-chilling beauty.

My blood was squeezed from my body and I became a vampire.

It sounds like a joke, but wasnt funny at all.

I gained a body that would burn up in the sun, loathed crosses, was
vulnerable to garlic, and would melt from holy water. In exchange, I
gained tremendous physical abilities. What awaited me afterwards
was a hellish reality. I was saved from that hell by a middle aged
man who happened to be passing by, Oshino Meme. Oshino Meme
was a hopeless adult who went from trip to trip without a
permanent residence. He brilliantly drove out the vampire and
dealt with everything else too.

As a result, I returned to being human.

I retained a small fraction of the physical abilities (namely, a bit of

heightened recovery speed and a heightened metabolism) and I was
once more fine with the sun, crosses, garlic, and holy water.

Really, it wasnt much.

It wasnt even anything worth ending with and I lived happily

ever after.

It had already been resolved, so there isnt much to talk about. The
only real remaining problem was having my blood drunk once a
month and getting superhuman vision and such afterwards.
However, those were all my own personal problems and I merely
had to spend the rest of my life facing them.

In my case, I was lucky.

For me, it only lasted for the duration of spring break.

The hell was only about 2 weeks long.

It was different for Senjougahara.

For Senjougahara Hitagi, when she met that crab, she had to deal
with the inconvenience to her body for over 2 years.

Most of her freedom had been taken by that inconvenience.

I had to wonder what it was like living that hell for over 2 years.

Given that, it may not have been all that surprising that she
admirably felt more of an obligation toward me than was suitable
for the little I had done. The physical inconvenience was one thing,
but having the emotional inconvenience removed must have been
more important to her than anything.

Emotional.

Mental.

Yes, those types of problems left you with no one to discuss it with
and no one who understood you. It may be that they chained you
up much more heavily and drove wedges between you and others
much more deeply than physical problems.

For instance, I may have recovered, but I continued to be afraid of

the morning sunlight coming in through the gap between the
curtains. In that case, she may have similar lingering effects.

I knew one other person who had been helped by Oshino like
Senjougahara and I, Class Rep Hanekawa Tsubasa. However, for
her, it had been even shorter than for me at only a few days and she
had lost the memories from that time. In a way, she may have been
the luckiest of us all. However, in about every other way,
Hanekawa had not been saved at all.
It was around here.

Hah?

The house I used to live in was around here.

The house?

I looked in the direction Senjougahara was pointing, but all I saw

was

Thats a road.

Indeed it is.

It was a wonderful road. From the color of the asphalt, it was clearly
newly paved. Which meant

So the land was developed?

Actually, it is known as rezoning.

Did you know?

I didnt.

Then you should look a little more surprised.

I do not show my emotions on my face.

True enough, her expression had not changed in the slightest.

However, the way Senjougahara stood staring at the place could be

interpreted as her feeling forlorn over having lost that destination.
Everything really has completely changed. Its hard to believe all
this happened in less than a year.

How boring.

After coming all that way, that is what she said.

And she truly did sound bored.

That had been one of the major reasons she had decided to break in
her new clothes in that area and now she was done with it.

She turned around.

Still hiding behind my legs, Hachikuji Mayoi peered out at

Senjougahara. In her caution, she remained silent. Despite being a
child or perhaps due to being a child she must have instinctually
seen Senjougahara as the greater threat than me. For a while, she
had been avoiding Senjougahara by using me as a barrier. It was
obvious that the living human that I was made a poor barrier and it
was also obvious that she was avoiding Senjougahara, so I felt really
awkward as the third party. However, Senjougahara showed no
sign of engaging Hachikuji (when she said this way or down this
road it was always only to me), so they were even.

It was still hard to bear as the one caught between them, though.

Oddly enough, from the way Senjougahara was acting, it seemed

like she would say I dont really know instead of I hate them or
I dislike them if I had asked her how she felt about children.
The house had been sold, so I didnt expect it to be exactly the
same, but I certainly did not expect it to be a road now. That does
leave me a little blue.

Yeah, I suppose it would.

I had no choice but to agree.

I could certainly imagine what it would be like.

On the way here from the park, the old roads and the new roads
had been all mixed together. Also, the guide map and the
residential map on the sign at the park had seemed completely
different from reality. It was enough to somehow wear down my
motivation and I had no real attachment to the area.

Not that anything could be done about it.

The cityscape would change just as people would change.

Senjougahara let out a long sigh and said, That was pointless and it
ate up a lot of time. Lets go, Araragi-kun.

Hm? Youre ready to go?

I am.

Oh, okay. Lets go, Hachikuji.

Hachikuji wordlessly nodded.

She may have thought saying something would reveal her location
to Senjougahara.

Senjougahara started walking on head.

Hachikuji and I followed.

How about you let go of my legs, Hachikuji? Its hard to walk like
this. Honestly, just quite clinging to me like Dakko-chan. Youre
gonna make me trip.

Just say something already.

At my coercion, Hachikuji said, Araragi-san, I am not clinging to

your giant leg because I want to.

I then forcibly pried her from my leg.

As I did so, a nice ripping sound effectwas not actually made.

How could you! Im going to complain to the PTA!

Hehh. The PTA, you say?

The PTA is an amazing organization! A minor citizen with no

influence like you stands no chance! They can toss you aside with
just one finger!

Just one finger, huh? How scary. By the way Hachikuji, do you
know what PTA stands for?

Eh? Um

As I had suspected, she did not, so she fell silent again.

Not that I knew.

At the very least, I managed to keep it from developing into an
annoying argument.

PTA stands for Parent Teacher Association, answered

Senjougahara from ahead of us. It also stands for the medical term
percutaneous transluminal angioplasty, but I doubt that is the
answer you wanted, Araragi-kun, so Parent Teacher Association
must be the correct answer.

Hehh. I had a vague idea that it was a gathering of parents, but I

didnt know it included the teachers too. You sure are
knowledgeable, Senjougahara.

No, you are merely severely lacking in knowledge and

incompetent, Araragi-kun.

I wont complain about the lacking in knowledge part because it

flowed from what I was saying, but incompetent was just plain
unnecessary.

Was it? Then I will change it to pathetic.

She did not even turn around.

She must really be in a bad mood

A normal person may have been wondering what was different

about that from her usual abuse, but after all the abuse she had sent
my way, I could instinctually tell the difference. There was simply
no edge to her words. If she had been in a good mood,
Senjougahara would have showered me with much, much more
abuse.

Hmm
I wonder what the problem is.

Was it finding out her house is a road, or is it me?

Both seemed likely.

Whichever it was, even if you ignored my child abuse and all, our
conversation had been cut short by Hachikujis trouble. Even if it
that had been the natural flow of events, it was natural for
Senjougahara to not be at peace in her heart.

In that case, I have to get this Hachikuji Mayoi to her destination as

quickly as possible and then work to put Senjougahara back in a good
mood. I can treat her to lunch, and go shopping with her. If there is still
time after that, we can go somewhere else for fun. Yeah, that should work.
Thanks to my sisters, I cant just go home, so I can spend the day attending
to Senjougahara. Luckily, I have plenty of money on me, so-Wait, why
am I so intent on doing things for her!?

I surprised myself.

By the way, Hachikuji.

What is it, Araragi-san?

About this memo.

I pulled the memo from my pocket.

I had not yet returned it to Hachikuji.

What is at this address?

And why are you headed there, I wanted to ask.

As the one guiding her, I wanted to know. Especially since she was
an elementary school girl out on her own.

Hah. I wont tell. Im going to make use of my right to remain

silent.

She really was an impertinent little girl.

Who was it that said children were pure and innocent?

If you dont tell me, I wont take you there.

I never asked you to. I can go on my own.

But I thought you were lost?

What about it?

Hachikuji, for future reference, theres nothing wrong with asking

others for directions.

Maybe for people like you who have no confidence. You can rely
on others all you want, but I dont need to do that. For me, this kind
of thing is no harder than using an everyday vending machine!

HehhSo its sold at a set price? was my odd response.

Well, from Hachikujis point of view, I was probably meddling.

When I was in elementary school, I believed I could do anything on
my own. I believed I did not need anyones help for anything and
that I would never need someone else to rescue me.
And yet there was of course no way that I could truly do
everything.

Understood, young lady. Please, would you kindly tell me what is

at this address?

Your words have no sincerity behind them.

She was quite stubborn.

Both my middle school-aged sisters would have certainly fallen for

that, but Hachikuji had a clever-looking face, so I decided she
would not be dealt with as easily as some dumb kid.

Honestly, the trouble I go to.

Okay.

A brilliant idea came to me.

I pulled my wallet out of my back pocket.

I had plenty of money on me.

Young lady, would you like some money?

Yahoo! Ill tell you anything!

What a dumb kid.

I mean, that is just really stupid.

I had a feeling that no child had ever been kidnapped using that
method, but Hachikuji seemed to have the makings of being the
first.
Someone named Tsunade-san lives there.

Tsunade? Is that a family name?

It is an excellent family name! shouted back Hachikuji, seeming to

have taken offense.

I understand that it wouldnt feel good to have someone you

knews name referred to in that way, but it was nothing to get mad
about. It made her seem emotionally unstable.

Hmm, so how do you know this person?

Tsunade-san is a relative of mine.

A relative, huh?

I concluded that she must have been using that Sunday to head to
her relatives house. I did not know whether she had fairly laissez
faire parents or if she had snuck out on her own, but it seemed that
elementary school girls weekend adventure had failed.

Is Tsunade-san a cousin you get along well with? From the look of
that backpack, Im guessing youve come a fair ways. Honestly, you
should have done this over Golden Week instead. Or is there some
reason that it had to be today?

Something like that.

You should at least spend Mothers Day with your parents.

That was not really something I should have been saying.

Onii-chan, its because youre like this.

Whats wrong with being like this?

I dont want to hear that from you, Araragi-san.

What do you know!?

I can just tell.

It seemed that she had no real reason. She simply physiologically

did not like having me lecture her.

How cruel.

And what were you doing, Araragi-san? I dont think any decent
person would be sitting blankly on a park bench on a Sunday
morning.

I wasnt really doing anything. I was just-

I almost said, killing time, but I stopped myself at the last second.

Thats right. A guy who says he is killing time when asked what he is
doing is worthless. That was close.

I was just doing some touring.

Oh, some touring? How cool.

She praised me.

I expected some horrible words to soon follow, but none came.

I see. So Hachikuji is capable of praising me

It was only on my bicycle, though.

I see. Well, a bike is standard for touring. It is a bit disappointing

though. Do you not have a license, Araragi-san?

Unfortunately, my schools rules prohibit getting a license. But a

bike really is more dangerous, so Id prefer a car.

I see. But then it would be fouring, wouldnt it?

Wow, now thats a funny mistake. She thinks touring is spelled two-
ring. Should I correct or her let it slide? Im not sure which one is the
kinder option.

By the way, Senjougahara gave no response to this as she walked on

ahead.

She made no attempt at all to enter the conversation.

I wondered if she was simply unable to hear such a low intelligence

conversation.

Incidentally, that was when I saw Hachikuji Mayois carefree smile

for the first time. It was quite charming and it seemed to open my
heart. The usual way of describing that type of smile was to say it
was like a blooming sunflower, but it was also the type of smile that
most people stopped making after getting much older than her.

Sigh. Oh, god.

That was a close one. If I was a lolicon, I would fallen for her there. I really
am glad Im not a lolicon.
The roads around here really are a tangled mess. What kind of
structure is this? How did you think you could navigate through all
this on your own?

This isnt my first time doing this.

Oh, I see. But then why are you lost?

Because its been a while, said Hachikuji, sounding ashamed.

Yes, what you think you can do and what you can do are two
different things. What you think is nothing more than thoughts.
That is true for elementary schoolers, high schoolers, and people of
every other age.

By the way, Arararagi-san.

You added an extra ra!

Sorry, I bit my tongue.

Dont bite your tongue in such an unpleasant way

It cant be helped. Everyone says things wrong sometimes. Or have

you said everything perfectly from the moment you were born,
Araragi-san?

I cant say Ive done that, but I know I dont say peoples names
wrong.

Then say Basu Gasu Bakuhatsu[3] three times fast.

That is not someones name.

Yes, it is. I know three people named that, so it must be a fairly
common name.

She was brimming with confidence.

I was shocked at just how obvious childrens lies were.

Basu gasu bakuhatsu, basu gasu bakuhatsu, basu gasu

bakuhatsu.

I ended up saying it.

What animal devours dreams? asked Hachikuji as soon as I was

done.

When did this become the ten-times quiz[4]?

The baku?

Nope. Wrong, said Hachikuji with a triumphant expression. The

animal that devours dreams is She put on a fearless smile. the
human.

This is no time to be clever!

I shouted louder than I meant to because I subconsciously really did

think it was clever.

Anyway, the residential area was very quiet.

As we walked along, we did not pass by anyone else. The area

seemed to be one of those where the people who had to leave left in
the mornings and those who did not need to leave stayed in all day.
Well, the area I lived in was pretty much the same. The main
difference was that the houses here were much larger. It must have
been an area populated by mostly rich people. I recalled that
Senjougaharas father was a big shot in a foreign investment
company, so I surmised that that was the type of people that lived
there.

Foreign investments, hm?

It was not a term that really seemed to fit that back country area.

Hey, Araragi-kun, said Senjougahara, speaking up for the first

time in a while. Could you tell me the address again?

Hm? Sure. Are we close?

Perhaps, or maybe she said vaguely.

Not understanding what she meant, I read off the memo once more.

Senjougara nodded and said, It seems we overshot it.

Eh? We did?

It seems that way, she said calmly. If you wish to rebuke me, do
so as much as you like.

Um, Im not going to rebuke you over something like that.

Why does she get so serious like that?

She was so honorable that it seemed more like she did not know
when to give up.

I see.
With a composed face that showed no impatience, Senjougahara
turned around to face the path she had just come down. To avoid
her, Hachikuji made the exact opposite movements in order to keep
me in the center between them.

Why are you so afraid of Senjougahara? She hasnt done anything

to you. In fact, while it may be hard to tell at first glance, she is the
one guiding you, not me.

I was merely following her.

I really was in no position to say anything self important.

Even if she disliked Senjougahara due to some childs intuition, she

was going too far. Not even Senjougahara was made of steel. Even
she would be hurt if Hachikuji continued to avoid her like that. And
even if I set aside my concern for Senjougahara, Hachikujis attitude
toward her was wrong from a moral standpoint.

I am at a loss as to what to say in response to that, said Hachikuji

with surprising modesty and despondency.

She then lowered her voice to a whisper and said, But cant you
feel it, Araragi-san?

Feel what?

The fierce animosity emanating from her.

It seemed to be something more than intuition.

The worst part was that I could not say she was wrong.
She seems to hate me. I can feel her will strongly telling me to
disappear because I am in the way.

I doubt shes actually thinking that, butHmm.

Here goes.

I was afraid, but I decided to ask.

The answer was obvious to me, but it still seemed that I had to ask.

Hey, Senjougahara.

What?

As usual, she did not turn around.

It might have been me that she thought was in the way and wanted
to disappear.

We both thought of the other as a friend, so it was strange how we

were simply unable to get along.

Do youhate children?

Yes. I absolutely loathe them. I wish every last one of them would
die.

She showed no restraint.

Hachikuji let out a short cry of terror and shrank down behind me.

I have no idea how to approach them. A while back I think it was

in middle school I bumped into a child of about 7 while shopping
in a department store.
Oh, did you make the kid cry?

No, it wasnt that. It was what I said to the 7 year old child. I said,
Are you okay? Are you hurt? Im sorry. I really am.

I had no idea what to say to a child, so I lost my cool. That led me

to give such a horrible response. It was such a shock that, ever since,
I have endeavored to turn my hatred toward the things known as
children whether they are human or not.

It was something like an outburst of anger.

I understood her reasoning, but I could not understand how she

felt.

By the way, Araragi-kun.

What?

It seems we overshot it again.

Hahh?

Overshot what? Oh, the address.

Eh? Really? Twice?

With an unfamiliar area, it was not uncommon for the address to

not quite match up with the actual layout of things, but this was the
area Senjougahara had lived in until recently.

If you are able to rebuke me for this, then do so as much as you

like.
Im not going to rebuke you over something like-wait.
Senjougahara, did your line change slightly from before?

Oh, did it? I didnt notice.

Whats going on? Oh, right. You mentioned rezoning before,

didnt you? Come to think of it, if your house is now a road, it isnt
too surprising that things have changed so much from what you
remember.

No, it isnt that. Senjougahara checked her surroundings. The

number of roads has increased, old houses have disappeared, and
new ones have been built, but none of the old roads are completely
gone. I should not be getting lost like this.

Hmm?

But the fact was, she actually was getting lost. It was possible she
simply did not want to admit her own careless mistake. She could
be fairly obstinate in her own way.

What? asked Senjougahara. From your expression, you seem to

have some kind of complaint. Araragi-kun, if you have something
to say, then be a man and say it. If you like, I will strip naked and
prostrate myself before you right here and now.

Are you trying to make everyone think Im the worlds worst

man?

How could I let her do that in a residential area like that?

Also, that wasnt the kind of thing I was into.

If it would show the world that Araragi Koyomi is the worlds
worst man, then nude prostration is a cheap price to pay.

Whats cheap is your pride.

I couldnt figure out whether she had too much or too little pride.

But I will keep on my socks.

Even if you end this with a lame joke, I dont have any strange
fetishes like that.

When I said socks, I meant fishnet stockings.

Going farther toward crazy isnt going to help.

Actually, even if my tastes dont lie there, I wouldnt mind seeing her in
fishnet stockings. She doesnt even have to be nude otherwise. Hm, if she
was wearing stockings like that

I can tell from your face that you are thinking indecent thoughts,
Araragi-kun.

Of course not. Does a person who endeavors to hold up the

principles of purity such as myself seem like he would be the owner
of such a vulgar personality? I am truly shocked that you would
think that, Senjougahara.

Oh? Whether there is any basis or not, I try to always say such
things to you, Araragi-kun. The fact that this time you simply
denied it without any kind of retort seems suspicious.

Uuh
Well, if nude prostration is not enough for you, I suppose you
must be intending to use a permanent marker to write lewd words
on every inch of my flesh.

My thoughts didnt go that far!

Then how far did they go?

More importantly, umm, Hachikuji.

I forcibly changed the subject.

I had learned how to do that by watching Senjougahara.

Sorry, but this looks like its going to take longer than I thought.
But if you recognize this area

I do not.

Hachikujis tone was surprisingly calm. In fact, it was an

emotionless and mechanical tone that sounded like she was reciting
a formula she had memorized.

It is probably impossible.

Eh? Probably?

If probably isnt enough for you, then it is definitely impossible.

It wasnt that probably wasnt enough for me.

Nor was it that definitely was enough.

Even so, I was unable to say anything.

It was that tone of voice.

No matter how many times I try, I will never get there.

Hachikuji

I will never get there.

Hachikuji repeated herself.

I will never get to my mothers place.

She was like a broken record.

She was like an unbroken record.

After all, that is what happens with the lost snail.

005

The lost cow, said Oshino Meme in a low, annoyed groan that
made it sound like he had been forcibly woken up midway through
1000 years of being peacefully sealed away. He didnt have low
blood pressure, but it seemed he had a difficult time waking up.
The difference from his normal sociability was striking. That
would be the lost cow.

Cow? No, not a cow. She said snail.

If you write it with the kanji, it has cow in it. Oh, Araragi-kun,
were you writing snail in katakana? You must have a low IQ. It
takes the kanji for spiral[5] and changes the water radical on the left
to the insect radical. Just add the kanji for cow[6] at the end and you
have snail[7].

Spiral...to snail, hm?

On its own, its pronounced ka or ke, but its really not used often
outside of the word snail. A snails shell does have a spiral on it
after all. Its also similar to the kanji for calamity[8]...and maybe
thats a little more symbolic. There are countless monsters that lead
people astray, but when it comes to ones that obstruct ones
path...well, surely even you are familiar with the nurikabe, Araragi-
kun. If its that type and is a snail, then it must be the lost cow. In
this case, the name refers to its essence not its form, so a cow and a
snail are essentially the same. As for its form, art of it with a human
form remains. Araragi-kun, most of the time with monsters, the
person who came up with the name and the person who did the art
are different people. You can pretty much say thats true for all of
them. Generally, the name comes first. I say the name, but really its
more of a general idea. Well, its kind of like the illustrations for a
light novel. Before the visual form of a character is made, a general
idea about the character exists. It is often said that a name
represents the body, but the body being referred to there is not the
physical body or the outer appearance. It refers to the essence of
what it is...Yawwn.

He really did sound tired.

However, that eliminated a lot of the superficiality of his

personality, so it made him easier to talk to. Speaking with Oshino
could be truly tiring.

The snail.
A terrestrial pulmonate with a spiral shell of clade
Stylommatophora.

Slugs were much more common to run across, but that was a type
that had retrogressed away from having a shell.

If you sprinkled salt on them, they melted.

After we left off, Senjougahara Hitagi, Hachikuji Mayoi, and I had

retried and continued five more times. We tried everything from
shortcuts that led directly there to overwhelmingly long and out of
the way detours, but every single one of them turned out to be
magnificently wasted effort. We knew for sure that we were near
our destination, but we were simply unable to reach it. In the end,
we even tried going from door to door, stopping at each and every
house, but even that was fruitless.

As a truly last resort, Senjougahara used some special function of

her cell phone (I didnt really understand) that was a navigation
system using GPS or something.

However, her phone lost its signal just before she could download
the data.

It was at that point that I finally, reluctantly, and much too late truly
understood what was going on. She had not said anything, but it
seemed Senjougahara had sensed this much earlier and Hachikuji
likely understood the situation much more deeply than either of us.

For me, it was a demon.

For Hanekawa, it was a cat.

For Senjougahara, it was a crab.

And for Hachikuji, it seemed to be snail.

That meant that I could not simply give up on it all. If it had been a
normal case of a lost child that we had been unable to resolve on
our own, we could have taken her to a nearby police box and felt
good about how we had helped out. However, that side of things was
involved...

Senjougahara was also opposed to simply bringing Hachikuji to a

police box.

Senjougahara had been immersed in that side of things for years.

If she felt that way, there was no mistaking it.

However, that also meant it was a problem that Senjougahara and I

could not deal with on our own. Neither of us had special powers to
that end or anything like that. All we were able to do was know that
it was a problem on that side of things.

It is said that knowledge is power.

However, merely knowing left us utterly powerless.

It was a quick and dirty solution and we didnt particularly like

having to take it, but at the end of our discussion, we decided to
consult Oshino.

Oshino Meme.

He had saved me...no, us.

However, he was certainly the type of person you would want to

avoid being around as much as possible if he had not saved you. He
was over thirty yet had no permanent residence, and had been
sleeping in an old abandoned cram school ever since he first came
to this town over a month ago. That alone would be enough for a
normal person to draw back.

For now, I have an interest in this town.

That was what he had said.

As such, he was a true wanderer who could easily disappear at any

time. However, we had met him the past Monday for
Senjougaharas issue and on the Tuesday to settle things afterwards.
Also, I had met Oshino just the day before, so he was surely still in
that abandoned building.

That left the issue of how to contact him.

He had no cell phone.

That meant the only option was to head there to speak with him
directly.

Senjougahara had only just met Oshino the week before and she
really barely knew him, so I was the natural candidate to go, but
Senjougahara herself volunteered.

Would you lend me your mountain bike?

Sure, but do you know where to go? I could draw you a map, if
you like.

Araragi-kun, you are not going to make me happy by worrying

about me if you assume I have as poor a memory as you. In fact, it
will upset me.
...I see.

Her words upset me.

They truly did.

To be honest, I had wanted to ride this mountain bike from the

moment I saw it in the parking lot.

So you were being honest when you said it was the best... I had
assumed otherwise because you arent the most honest person.

Also, said Senjougahara, whispering into my ear. Do not leave

me alone with that child.

......

I wont know what to do.

Well, I guess that isnt too surprising.

And I bet Hachikuji wouldnt like it much either.

I handed the mountain bikes key to Senjougahara. Senjougahara

had previously said that she did not own a bicycle, so loaning my
precious bike to her might have actually been a bit dangerous, but I
had a feeling that the bike would be fine with her.

And so I ended up waiting for Senjougahara to contact me.

I had returned to the bench in that park of unknown pronunciation.

Hachikuji Mayoi sat next to me.

She sat far enough away that another person could sit between us.
She could run off at any time if she wanted to.

In fact, her position made it look like she was about to.

I had explained to her the issues that Senjougahara and I had held
as well as our continuing circumstances related to those problems,
but that seemed to have only made her raise her guard even further.
I had hoped to lower her guard a bit, but my failed attempt had just
made things worse. I had no choice but to start back from square
one.

After all, trust was incredibly important.

Sigh...

I guess I should try talking to her.

One thing had caught my attention before.

I thought I heard you mention your mother before. What did you
mean by that? I thought Tsunade-san was a relative of yours?

......

No response.

Apparently, she was once again making use of her right to remain
silent.

I doubted the same method would continue to work, and that

method had only been any fun because it had been a joke. If I
continued to use it, it would start to seem even to me like I was
serious about it.
And so...

Hachikuji-chan, Ill let you have some ice cream, so could you
come a little closer?

Sure thing!

Hachikuji immediately slid herself closer to me.

...Apparently whether I actually make good on my promises doesnt

matter.

In fact, I had not even given her a single yen before, so she was
quite an easy person to manipulate.

Anyway, about what I was saying before...

What was that again?

Your mother.

......

And the right to remain silent was back.

I continued speaking anyway.

Were you lying when you said it was a relatives house?

...That wasnt a lie, said Hachikuji in a peevish tone of voice. My

mother is one of my relatives.

Well, I suppose thats true, but...

Isnt that just splitting hairs?

And why would a girl be out on a Sunday with a backpack, heading for her
mothers house?

Also, said Hachikuji in the same peevish tone. Even though I

called her my mother, she unfortunately isnt my mother anymore.

Oh...

Divorce.

Living only with ones father.

I had heard a similar story quite recently.

That was the story of Senjougaharas family.

Tsunade was my name up until I was in third grade. When I was

taken in by my father, my family name changed to Hachikuji.

Hm? Wait a second.

Things had started to get a little complicated, so I started organizing

the information in my head.

Hachikuji is in fifth grade, her family name was Tsunade up until the third
grade (that must be why she got so angry about what I said about that
name), and her family name changed to Hachikuji when she was taken in
by her father. ...Oh, I get it. When her parents got married, her father must
have taken on her mothers family name. The married name doesnt have to
come from the guy. So then they got divorced and her mother, Tsunade-
san, left the house and moved here...Actually, it was probably to her
parents house.
And then Hachikuji set out this Sunday, on Mothers Day, to visit her
mother.

That name was a precious name her mother and father had given
her.

Ahh, and here I was acting all superior and telling you to stay
home with your parents...

I could see why she hadnt wanted to hear that from me.

No, this is not because this is Mothers Day. I always want to head
to my mothers house if I have a chance.

...I see.

But I can never reach it.

......

Her parents had gotten divorced and her mother had left the house.

She could no longer see her mother.

She wanted to see her mother.

And so Hachikuji had tried to visit her mother.

She had put on that backpack and...

And she had...

So you met it then.

Met it? I dont know what you mean.

Hmm.

No matter how many times she had tried to visit her mother after
that, she had never once made it to her house.

Simply hearing that she had tried countless times and failed every
time may have made her sound stupid, but I felt it was wonderful
how she had not given up even after all that.

However...

......

It was not really right to compare, but her trouble seemed quite a bit
safer than the troubles Hanekawa, Senjougahara, or myself had
dealt with. She had no physical trouble and no mental trouble.
Instead, she only had the phenomenal trouble of not being able to
do something she should have been able to do. The problem was
not something within her.

The problem was external.

Her life was not in danger.

She could live her everyday life without any real difficulty.

Even if that was true, I decided that no matter what I would not
speak about her problem like I knew what I was talking about. No
matter what had happened to me over spring break, I had no right
to say that kind of thing to Hachikuji.

And so I aimed to say nothing unnecessary.

You certainly have it tough, was all I said.

That was what I really, truly thought.

In truth, I wanted to rub her head.

And so I tried to.

Grr!

I ended up getting my hand bit.

Oww! What the hell was that for, you brat!?

Grrrrr!

Ow! Ow ow ow!

This was no joke, play-bite, or way of hiding her embarrassment.

She truly was biting down as hard as she could. I could feel
Hachikujis teeth ripping through my skin and ripping through my
flesh. Without even looking, I could tell blood was spewing out. It
really was nothing to joke about.

Why is she doing this!? Wait, dont tell me I fulfilled the requirements for
this event without even realizing it!

Does this mean the battle has begun!?

I took my other hand and clenched it into a tight fist. It was as if I

was trying to crush the air. I then drove that fist into Hachikujis
solar plexus. The solar plexus was one of the vital areas of the
human body that nothing could be done about. As her teeth
remained deeply embedded in my hand despite that blow,
Hachikuji was quite something, but for an instant, the strength of
her bite lessened. I used that opening to use the ridiculous strength
of my arm. Hachikuji was digging into my flesh, but that left the
rest of her unguarded. And luckily, Hachikuji was standing up
slightly from the bench seat.

I took the hand I had punched her with, opened the fist, and held
her up with it. In the process, I felt something surprisingly filled-in
for a fifth grade girl, but I was not a lolicon, so it had so little effect
on me that you might as well say it was nothing. I used momentum
to swing her completely around and upside down. As she was still
biting my hand, the area around her neck was all twisted around,
but that was no problem. As long as she was biting my hand, any
attack near her head had the danger of coming back to bite
me...literally. Due to flipping her over, Hachikujis body was
displayed before me like a pile of tiles to be broken with a karate
chop, and that was my target. More specifically, my target was her
solar plexus where I had already punched her once.

Khaahhh!

It worked perfectly.

Hachikujis teeth finally let go of my hand.

At the same time, she coughed up something that looked like

gastric juices.

And then she lost consciousness.

Heh...Actually, I guess this isnt funny.

I shook my bitten hand to loosen it.

After the first time, this kind of victory is so empty...

Standing there was a high school boy who had punched an
elementary school girl twice in the most central of the human
bodys vital spots, knocking her unconscious, and who had then
started putting on airs of nihilism.

And as before, that boy was me.

......

Striking, grabbing, and throwing were one thing, but out and out
punching a girl was out of the question.

Araragi Koyomi had done more than enough to be deemed the

worlds worst man without even needing Senjougahara to prostrate
nude before him.

Ahh...But its because she bit me all of a sudden.

I looked down at the bite wound.

Gehh...Wow, I can see the bone... I didnt know a human could do this
much damage with a bite...

However, even if I could feel the pain, that level of wound would
heal before long even if I just stood there.

As the wound closed up fast enough to see, it looked like a video

being fast-forwarded or rewound. It reminded me just how
different an existence I was from the norm. Being reminded of that
put me in a bit of a dark, bitter mood.

Honestly, youre pathetic.

You think youre the worlds worst man? Dont make me laugh.
Do you really think you qualify as human anymore?

That is a scary look on your face, Araragi-kun, said a sudden

voice.

For an instant, I thought it was Senjougahara, but it couldnt have

been. Senjougahara would never speak in such a cheerful voice.

Standing before me was the class rep.

It was Hanekawa Tsubasa.

It was Sunday and yet she was wearing her school uniform.
Although I suppose that was normal for her. An excellent student
like her enjoys being dressed like that. With the same hairstyle and
glasses as always, the only difference from when she was at school
was the handbag she was holding.

H-Hanekawa.

You look surprised to see me. Well, I suppose thats for the best.
Heh heh heh.

Hanekawa showed me an excellent smile.

It was a very carefree smile.

In fact, it was the same as the one Hachikuji had made before...

What are you doing here?

U-um, what are you doing here?

I was unable to hide my agitation.

I had to wonder just how much she had seen.

If that mass of diligence, that living example of proper conduct, that

pillar of innocence that was Hanekawa Tsubasa had seen me acting
violently toward an elementary school girl, that would be very, very
bad in a completely different way than if Senjougahara had seen.

I didnt want to be expelled after making it all the way to the third
year.

Why do you need to ask me? I live around here. If either of us

being here is odd, its you Araragi-kun. Are you in this area for any
particular reason?

Um...

Oh, right.

Senjougahara and Hanekawa went to the same middle school.

Since it had been public school, they must have been in the same
school district. In that case, Senjougaharas old domain being within
Hanekawas area of activity was not surprising. Since they went to
different elementary schools, they must not have lived in the exact
same area though.

No, not really. Im just here to...yknow... kill some time or-...

Whoops.

I just said I was killing time.

Ah ha. I see. Killing time. How nice. Not having anything to do is

wonderful. Its so freeing, isnt it? I guess I was killing time too.
......

She really was a different being from Senjougahara in every way.

They were both smart, but I suppose that is the difference between
top class and the top.

You know how difficult it is for me to be at my home, right,

Araragi-kun? Since the library isnt open, Sundays are my walking
days. Its good for my health.

Id say youre worrying too much.

Hanekawa Tsubasa.

The girl with the strangely shaped wings.

At school, she was a mass of diligence, a living example of proper

conduct, a pillar of innocence, the class rep among class reps, and
impeccable, but she had some discord in her family life.

Some discord and a distortion.

Due to that, she had been possessed by a cat.

She had been possessed through a slight gap in her heart.

That may have been a good example of the fact that no one could be
truly perfect, but when that problem had been resolved and she had
been freed from the cat, her memories had been lost. And so the
discord and the distortion had not been dealt with.

The discord and the distortion remained.

The library not being open on Sundays seems to display just how
uncivilized the area we live in is. Ah ha. I really dont like that at
all.

I dont even know where the library is.

Cmon now. Dont say things like that. It makes it sound like
youve already given up. Theres still time until the entrance exam,
so you can do it.

Hanekawa, sometimes baseless encouragement can be even more

painful than direct abuse.

But you can do math, right, Araragi-kun? If you can do math,

theres no way you cant do the other subjects.

Math is easy because you dont have to memorize anything.

You certainly are uncooperative. Well, whatever. Ill just leave you
with a cmon, now for that. By the way, Araragi-kun, is that your
little sister?

Hanekawa pointed toward Hachikuji who was lying on the ground

next to the bench.

My little sisters arent that small.

Oh.

Theyre in middle school.

Hmm.

Umm, shes lost. Her name is Hachikuji Mayoi.

Mayoi?

Its spelled with the first kanji of truth and the first kanji of dusk.
And her family name is-...

I know how that must be spelled. You often hear the term
Hachikuji in the Kansai area. Thats a very historic and pompous
sounding name. Come to think of it, I think the temple in
Shinonome Monogatari was named...no, wait. The kanji are
different.

...You know everything, dont you?

I dont know everything. I only know what I know.

Oh, I see...

Hachikuji Mayoi, hm? Now those are two names that go together
well. Oh? I think shes woken up.

I looked over at Hachikuji and saw her blinking her eyes. After
hesitantly looking around as if to check on her surroundings,
Hachikuji sat up.

Hello, Mayoi-chan. I am this boys friend. My name is Hanekawa

Tsubasa.

Her tone of voice was straight out of Taisou no Onii-san.

Or in her case, I guess it would be Taisou no Onee-san.

Hanekawa was probably the type that would have no problem

talking to cats or dogs in baby talk.
In response, Hachikuji said, Please do not talk to me. I hate you.

Does she say that to everyone?

Oh? Did I do something to make you hate me? You shouldnt say
that to people when you first meet them, Mayoi-chan. Uri uri.

However, Hanekawa showed no sign of being affected by

Hachikujis words.

She also easily managed to pull off what I had not: rub Hachikuji
Mayois head.

Hanekawa, do you like kids?

Hm? Do you not?

No, it isnt me that doesnt.

Hmm. Well, yes, I do like children. When I think about how I used
to be like this, it gives me a nice warm feeling inside. Uri uri.

Hanekawa continued to rub Hachikujis head.

Hachikuji tried to resist.

But it was useless.

U-uuhhh...

Youre so cute, Mayoi-chan. Ahh! I just want to eat you up. Your
cheeks are so squishy and soft. Kyahh!! Oh, but...

Her tone suddenly changed.

It was now the tone she occasionally turned on me at school.

You shouldnt bite peoples hands like that. In this case, he was
fine, but a normal person would have been seriously injured! Meh!

She hit her. With her fist. Like it was nothing.

U-uuhh?

The quick transition from kindness to being struck left Hachikuji in

utter confusion and Hanekawa used that opportunity to forcibly
turn her to face me.

Okay! Now say youre sorry.

I-Im sorry, Araragi-san.

She apologized.

That impertinent brat whose tone of voice alone would be polite

apologized.

It was quite a shock.

Wait, this means Hanekawa had been watching for a bit before she
approached... I see. I get it. Normally thinking, when youre bit to the point
of your flesh being torn out, self defense is justified. And come to think of
it, shes the one that attacked first with the fight from earlier too...

While Hanekawa was not all that flexible, she was still not that
much of a stickler for the rules.

She was merely fair.

From the way she had handled that, Hanekawa seemed used to
dealing with children. I was pretty sure she was an only child, so
she had done quite well indeed.

Incidentally, I had already realized that Hanekawa treated me like a

child at school, but lets not think about that too much.

And Araragi-kun, what you did was wrong too!

She used the exact same tone on me.

She seemed intent on forcing me to think about how she treated me.

However, she actually realized what she had done and cleared her
throat before starting over.

Well, anyway, that was wrong.

You mean...punching her?

No, I mean you need to properly scold her.

Oh...

Of course, you also shouldnt have punched her, but if youre

going to strike a child or anyone for that matter you need to tell
them what they have done to deserve it.

......

That is what it means to talk it out.

Whenever I speak with you, I always learn something.

She really had a way of draining the poison out of a situation.

She proved that there were good people in the world.

That alone made me feel like I had been saved.

So you said she was lost? Where does she want to go? Is it nearby?
If so, I can probably show her the way.

Umm, Senjougahara went to get someone to help, so...

Even if she had a connection to that side of things, Hanekawa had

no memories of it. She knew, but she had forgotten. I felt it was best
not to pick at those memories like a scab.

I appreciated her offer, but...

It seems to have taken a lot of time, but she should be done soon.

Huh? Senjougahara-san? Araragi-kun, you were with

Senjougahara-san? Hmm? Senjougahara-san has been absent from
school recently, but...Hmm? Oh, come to think of it, you were
asking about her the other day...Hmm?

Ah.

Shes getting suspicious.

Hanekawas powers of misunderstanding were about to explode.

Ahh! I see! So thats it!

No, Im pretty sure you have the wrong idea...

I knew it was wrong for an idiot like me to deny the answer given
by a genius like her, but...
Your powers of delusion outdo even those of those girls that are
into yaoi.

Yaoi? Whats that?

Hanekawa tilted her head to the side in confusion.

The genius student did not know this.

Its an abbreviation of YAma nashi Ochi nashi Imi shinchou[9].

That sounds made up. Fine, Ill look it up on my own.

You certainly are diligent.

......

What if this leads to Hanekawa straying down the wrong path?

Itll be my fault.

Since I seem to be interrupting, I will be going. Say hello to

Senjougahara-san for me. Also, today is Sunday so I wont say too
much, but make sure to restrain yourselves some. Also, we have a
history quiz, so dont forget to study. Also, the major preparations
for the cultural festival are about to begin, so work hard. Also...

After that, Hanekawa added on 9 more alsos.

She may have been the next great user of also after Natsume
Souseki[10].

Oh, Hanekawa. Can I ask you one thing? Do you know of a

Tsunade-san that lives around here somewhere?
A Tsunade-san? Hmm...well...

She seemed to be searching her memory. I got my hopes up that this

meant she might know, but...

No, I dont, she said.

So there are things you dont know.

Didnt I tell you? I only know what I know. For everything else, I
am no help at all.

I see.

It was true that she hadnt known what yaoi meant either.

It seemed things would not be resolved so easily.

Sorry I was unable to meet your expectations.

Dont worry about it.

Then I will be going. Bye bye.

And then Hanekawa Tsubasa left the park.

I wonder if she would have known how to pronounce the parks name.

Maybe I should have made that my question.

And then my cell phone started to ring.

An 11 digit number was displayed on the screen.

......
Sunday, May 14th, 14:25:30.

That was the instant I obtained Senjougaharas phone number.

006

So what kind of monster or apparition is this lost cow? And how

do we drive it away?

Araragi-kun, why are your thoughts always so violent? Did

something good happen?

Apparently, Senjougahara had woken up Oshino. He had

complained that she was horrible for interrupting his Sunday
morning rest, but it was already the afternoon and for Oshino every
day was Sunday and it was summer break year round. I really did
not feel the government had given him the right to say something
like that.

Oshino did not have a cell phone, so he had been forced to use
Senjougaharas to call me. However, the reason he did not have a
phone was not merely his principles or a lack of money. It seemed
Oshino was terrible with electronics.

When I had heard him say, Hey, Tsundere-chan, what button am I

supposed to press when I want to talk? I almost hung up right then
and there.

Its not a two-way radio.

But what is going on? This goes beyond unusual. Its abnormal.
You really have met a lot of monsters in this short time, Araragi-
kun. Im quite pleased. Just getting attacked by a vampire would
have been more than enough, but then there was Class Rep-chans
cat, Tsundere-chans crab, and now youve met this snail.

Im not the one that met it.

Hm? Youre not?

How much did Senjougahara tell you?

Oh, I think she told me everything, but I was still half asleep. Its
all a bit vague, so I must be misremembering something. Oh, but I
have always wanted a cute high school girl to wake me up. This
was like a wonderful dream. Araragi-kun, thanks to you, the dream
Ive had ever since middle school has been fulfilled.

...And how does that feel?

Hmm, Im still too tired to really tell.

Fulfilled dreams were often like that.

It really didnt matter who you were or what the circumstances

were.

Oh, Tsundere-chan is giving me a frightful look. My, my. How

scary. Did something good happen?

Who knows...

You dont know? You really dont understand girls, do you,

Araragi-kun? Well, whatever. Heh. It is true that once you get
involved in this world, its easier to get dragged back in, but this is
still too concentrated. Class Rep-chan and Tsundere-chan are your
classmates and, from what I heard, this is where theyre both from,
right?

Senjougahara doesnt live here anymore, though. But I dont think

that matters. I dont think Hachikuji lives here.

Hachikuji?

Oh, you hadnt heard? Hachikuji Mayoi is the name of the kid who
met the snail.

Oh...

He paused for a second.

It did not seem to be simply due to his drowsiness.

Hachikuji Mayoi, hm? Ha ha. I see. Its all coming together. What I
was told is coming back to me now. I see. It almost seems like fate.
Its pretty much a pun.

A pun? Oh, you mean that Mayoi is pronounced the same as

lost? And then a lost child meeting the lost cow. Thats a
surprisingly unfunny joke, Oshino.

I would never make a joke that crappy. I dont laugh at nothing.

As they say, a smile can hide a blade. Im talking about Hachikuji
being paired with Mayoi. Are you unfamiliar with the term
Hachikuji? It comes from the fifth stanza of Shinonome
Monogatari.

Hahh?

Hanekawa had mentioned that, too.

Not that I knew what they were talking about.

You really dont know anything, do you, Araragi-kun? That does

give purpose to my explanations, but I really dont have time right
now. Im pretty tired. Hm? Whats that, Tsundere-chan?

Senjougahara seemed to have said something to Oshino, so the

conversation was cut off for a short bit. I of course couldnt hear
what she was saying and it almost seemed like she was
purposefully speaking quietly enough that I would not be able to
hear.

I doubted there was some secret they were keeping from me, but I
was still curious.

Ah...Hmm.

I could only hear Oshinos words of confirmation.

And then I heard a long, heavy sigh.

Araragi-kun, you really are worthless.

Hah? Where did that come from all of a sudden? I didnt say a
thing about killing time.

If you have Tsundere-chan do this much for you, shes going to

feel responsible. Having the girl fix your problems for you is just
pathetic for a guy. What the girl is supposed to fix up is the guy
himself, not his troubles.

Um, uh... I do feel bad about getting Senjougahara wrapped up in

this. And I do feel responsible. Her issue was only just resolved last
week and now this...
No, not that. Honestly, Araragi-kun, I think youre getting a bit full
of yourself after resolving three monster problems in a row. Just so
you know, not everything you see or feel is real.

...I wasnt trying to be.

I instinctually shrank back from those harsh words. He had hit me

where it hurt. And unfortunately, a few such things did come to
mind.

Yes, you arent the type that would, Araragi-kun. I know you well
enough to know that. Im just saying you need to be more watchful
of your surroundings. But if you really arent getting full of
yourself, you must at least be pushing yourself. Listen carefully.
Not everything you see is real and not everything you cant see is
real either, Araragi-kun. I recall telling you something similar when
we first met. Did you forget?

I remember, but this isnt about me, Oshino. So can we get back to
the lost cow? Please tell me how to deal with that snail. How are we
supposed to drive it out?

I already told you not to think of it in terms of driving it out. You

just dont understand anything. If you keep saying things like that, I
expect you will eventually come to regret it. Make sure to take
responsibility for what youve done once that time comes, okay?
Anyway, about the lost cow. It...hm... Oshino hesitated. Ha ha.
Its just so simple its almost hard to say anything. Pretty much
anything I could say would end up saving you, Araragi-kun. And I
cant do that. You have to save yourself, Araragi-kun?

Its simple? Really?

This is nothing like a vampire. That was a truly rare case. I
suppose it isnt too surprising that youre a little mixed up with that
being your first time...Oh, I know. I suppose the lost cow is a bit
similar to the crab Tsundere-chan met.

Hmm.

The crab.

That crab.

Oh, right. Theres also the issue of Tsundere-chan. Ugh, I hate this.
My role is as an intermediary between humans and that side of
things, so acting as an intermediary between two people is outside
my area of expertise. Ha ha. Hmm, what am I doing? I think Ive
gotten a little too close with you, Araragi-kun. Or rather, I never
expected for someone to so readily rely on me or to have to resolve
anything over the phone.

...Well, this seemed like the simplest method.

It may have been simple, but we still did not like it.

However, the fact remained that we had had no other option.

Id rather you didnt contact me so easily. Most of the time when

you meet a monster, you arent going to have someone like me
around. Also, this is more of a common sense type of issue and not
my normal kind of advice, but you really shouldnt be sending a
teenage girl alone to some old ruins of a building where a
suspicious man lives.

Oh, so youre aware that youre suspicious and that you live in the
old ruins of a building...
However, he had a point. Senjougahara had so readily agreed in
fact, she had volunteered herself that I had been a bit lacking in
that kind of consideration.

But I know you wont do anything to her.

Normally, I would appreciate the trust, but certain lines need to be

drawn. Thats what we have rules for. A comfort zone that casually
crawls around is something we cannot have. Know what I mean?
No matter what, we need a cordoned off area of things that are
unacceptable. Otherwise, the territory of what we can do just
shrinks and shrinks. Its often said that all rules have exceptions, but
if its a rule, it shouldnt have exceptions. Then again, exceptions
cant exist without rules. Ha ha. Im starting to sound like Class
Rep-chan.

Nn...

He was actually right.

I decided to apologize to Senjougahara afterwards.

Anyways, it seems Tsundere-chan does not trust me as much as

you do, Araragi-kun. She has a tentative trust for me due to your
trust, so if something were to happen, the blame would lie with
you. Dont forget that. No, Im not going to do anything! Really, Im
not! Wah! Put down that stapler, Tsundere-chan!

......

She still has that stapler?

Well, I suppose habits arent usually broken in just a few days.

Hoo...Now that was a fright. That is one scary tsundere. She really
is unequalled when it comes to being a tsundere. Umm,
anyway...agh, I hate using phones. Its so hard to talk.

Hard to talk? Oshino, how bad with electronics can you be?

While there is that, my point is that while Im being completely

serious on my end, for all I know you could be sipping on a drink
and reading a manga. When I think about that, it just seems so
empty.

Youre surprisingly sensitive...

I suppose there are people who worry about that kind of thing,
though.

Lets do it this way. Ill tell Tsundere-chan what to do about the

lost cow, and you just wait there for her.

Is this really something I should be hearing second hand?

The lost cow itself is a piece of folklore so really all of this is second
hand.

Thats not what I meant. I was wondering if any kind of ritual is

needed like with Senjougharas case.

Nope. Its a similar type, but the snail isnt as much of a problem as
the crab. For one, it isnt a god. If I had to put a name to it, I suppose
I would call it a ghost. Its more of a ghost than a monster or a
bizarre phenomenon.

A ghost?
To me, a god, a ghost, a monster, and a bizarre phenomenon were
all pretty much the same in this kind of situation, but I could tell the
difference was important to Oshino.

But...a ghost?

A ghost is still a type of monster. The stories of the lost cow are not
mainly told in one particular region. They are told all over the
country. Its a rather minor monster and it has various names, but it
originated as the snail. Oh, one more thing, Araragi-kun. Hachikuji
was a term used to refer to a temple in a bamboo thicket. However,
back then the Hachiku part was spelled with the kanji for pale
and bamboo. Add temple to the end, and you get Hachikuji. If
you recall, there are two types of bamboo, hachiku and moso. Now
the hachiku variety is pronounced the same as splitting bamboo in
the phrase with the force of splitting bamboo, but that doesnt
really have anything to do with this. Now the reason the spelling of
Hachiku changed to the kanji for eight and nine was...well, it was
really a sort of play on words. Araragi-kun, are you familiar with
the 88 Temples of Shikoku and the 33 Western Temples?

Yes, I know that much.

I cant believe he had to ask.

Yes, I suppose even you would know that much. Anyway, if you
dont divide them up between the well-known and less well-
known, you end up with a really long list. In a similar way, some
temples were added to the list as 89th temples. Of course, as I said
before, Hachiku can be spelled with the kanji for 8 and 9, so that
name was given to those temples later to signify that they were
extra temples beyond the 88.

I see...
So this has to do with Shikoku.

Wait, I thought Hanekawa said something about Kansai?

Yes, said Oshino after I asked about it. Most of the temples
chosen as the 89th were Kansai temples. In that way, it may seem
more like the 33 Western Temples than the 88 Temples of Shikoku.
And now we get to the crux of the issue and the beginning of the
tragedy. You see, together the kanji for eight and nine can be read as
yaku which can mean disaster. Now, that isnt exactly a title you
want for your temple, is it?

...? Come to think of it, I initially thought it was pronounced yaku

when I saw her name. But that isnt what the term really means,
right?

The meaning came along with it nonetheless. Words can be scary

things. That kind of thing can become set whether you intended for
it or not. You could call it the soul of the word, but thats an idiom
Im sick of because of how often it gets used. Anyway, as that
interpretation of the name became more widespread, the title
stopped being used. Now, a lot of those 89th temples were
destroyed during the anti-Buddhist sentiments during the Meiji
Restoration, so only about a quarter of them still exist. Also, most of
the ones that do exist try to cover up the fact that they were once
known as a Hachikuji.

...

His explanation was overly vague and that made it easier to

understand, but it also made it seem like I would end up
embarrassed if I tried to repeat the information to someone else.
At any rate, that information seemed like something I would not get
a single hit for on an internet search engine, so I was conflicted as to
how much I should believe.

I decided to take it with a grain of salt.

If you understand that long history, seeing a name like Hachikuji

Mayoi seems oddly meaningful and troubling. The family name
and the given name fit too well. Its like Ooyake no Yotsugi or
Natsuyama no Shigeki. Surely youve studied the Great Mirror,
Araragi-kun. But the given name of Mayoi is still an issue. I mean,
its so straightforward. Its just so simple. It makes the entire name
seem suspicious. Heh, this would have been a lot easier if you had
noticed that right away, Araragi-kun.

What do you mean this would have been easier? Also, she...

Hachikuji was sitting on the bench, obediently waiting for me to

finish the conversation. She did not really seem to be listening in,
but I was sure she was. After all, we were talking about her.

She only got the family name of Hachikuji recently. Before that, it
was Tsunade.

Tsunade? Hehh, Tsunade of all things. All the threads are wrapped
together a little too tightly. Theyre starting to fray. Its gotten to be
too perfect to say it was just fate. It feels like a plan going off
without a hitch when that shouldnt have been possible. Hachikuji
and Tsunade...I see, I see. And then Mayoi on top of that. I suppose
that is actually the real deal. The true dusk[11]. Hah hah. Honestly
now. Thats just ridiculous.

Oshino muttered the last part almost absent-mindedly.

It seemed like he was speaking to himself, and yet he was still
speaking to me.

Oh, I suppose it doesnt really matter. This city truly is interesting.

Its like a melting pot of all sorts of interesting things. It doesnt look
like Ill be able to leave for a while. Anyway, Ill give the details to
Tsundere-chan, so you just ask her, okay, Araragi-kun?

Oh, okay.

Although, Oshino said in a teasing tone. I could see that thin

smile of his in my minds eye. That is of course if Tsundere-chan
tells you everything.

And then he hung up.

Oshino was not a man to give parting words.

Okay, Hachikuji. It looks like we can deal with this.

From what I heard of that conversation, I do not think I can expect

much.

Apparently, she had been listening in.

Although if she had only heard what I had said, she would not
know anything of actual importance.

Leaving that aside, Araragi-san.

What?

I happen to be hungry...

.....
So what?

Dont say it like youre beating around the bush about a duty of mine I
havent fulfilled.

However, I did realize she had a point. Due to the unresolved issue
of the snail, we had not let Hachikuji eat any lunch. And
Senjougahara had not had lunch either. I realized it was possible
Senjougahara had stopped to get something to eat on the way to see
Oshino, but I had been inconsiderate of the two of them
nonetheless.

I could sometimes forget because my body did not require me to eat

all that often.

Okay, when Senjougahara gets back, we can go get something to

eat. Although there only seem to be houses around here... Wait, can
you go to places other than your mothers house?

Yes, I can.

Oh, thats good. I suppose Senjougahara would know the closest

place to eat. What kind of food do you like?

I like any kind of food.

I see.

Your hand was delicious.

My hand is not food.

No need to be humble. It truly was delicious.

......

Since in all likelihood she had truly at least swallowed some of my

flesh and blood, that was not something that could be taken as a
joke.

She was a cannibal girl.

By the way, Hachikuji. Is it true that youve gone to your mothers

house before?

Yes. I do not lie.

I see...

However, she hasnt gotten lost simply due to it having been a while. It
was only after she met the snail that...wait? Why did Hachikuji meet the
snail?

There had to be a reason.

There was a reason I had been attacked by that vampire.

Hanekawa and Senjougahara both had their reasons.

In that case, Hachikuji must have had a reason as well.

Hey, your goal isnt reaching the destination in and of itself, right?
You merely want to do meet your mother.

Saying merely seems a bit insulting, but more or less.

Then cant you just have her come meet you? Even if you cant
reach the Tsunade household, your mother isnt trapped in the
house, right? Even after a divorce, a parent has the right to see her
child.

That was the knowledge of an amateur.

Right?

Thats impossible. It would be no use, replied Hachikuji without

hesitation. If I could do that, I would have done so long ago. I
cannot even call my mother.

Hmm...

Visiting my mother is the only option left to me. Even if I can

never, ever reach her.

The way she said it was a bit ambiguous, but I supposed the
situation in her household was rather complicated. In fact, at the
point that she was heading out on her own into a strange town on
Mothers Day, that should have been obvious. But even so, there
had to be a more rational way of dealing with this. For instance, if
Senjougahara went off on her own to the Tsunade household
and...but that would likely not work either. That kind of direct
attack was unlikely to work against a monster. Just like how
Senjougaharas phone had lost its signal when she tried to use the
GPS function, Hachikujis goal would never be achieved. I had only
been able to speak to Oshino over the phone because it had been
Oshino and not this Tsunade-san.

After all, monsters were part of the world itself.

Unlike normal living beings, they were connected to the world.

Science alone could not tell you everything about monsters. That
was why humans continued to be attacked by vampires in this day
and age.

Even if no darkness in the world could not be illuminated, darkness

would still exist.

And so, we had no choice but to wait for Senjougahara to arrive.

I really dont know anything about monsters. What about you,

Hachikuji? Do you know much about ghosts and monsters and
things?

Nnn...no, not at all, she replied after an odd hesitation. I only

know about the noppera-bo.

Oh, Koizumi Yakumos...

Najimu[12].

I dont think you want to grow accustomed to it.

It was of course, the mujina.

I doubt there are many people who didnt know that, though.

Its pretty scary.

Yes. But I really dont know any others.

Yeah, thats how these things are.

Speaking of monsters, my vampire was really more of a...no, I guess

it doesnt matter.
To humans, its pretty much the same thing.

Thats just an issue of the general idea.

The deeper issue is...

Hachikuji, I dont really get it. Why do you want to see your
mother so much? I honestly dont see what reason you have.

I thought it was normal for a child to want to see her mother. Was I
wrong?

Well, no...

She was right.

If there had been some kind of unusual reason, I thought I would be

able to find the reason she had met the snail, but it seemed she did
not have any real reason. It was just an impulsive and instinctual
desire that could not be put in words.

You live with your parents, right, Araragi-san? That is why you do
not understand. There are things about people who lack things that
those who do not lack them do not realize. People desire what they
lack. If you lived away from your parents, I am sure you would
want to see them, Araragi-san.

Maybe so.

It probably was so.

My worries were those of one who lives in luxury.

Onii-chan, its because youre like this.

From my standpoint, I am jealous of people like you who have
both your parents, Araragi-san.

I see...

Im next written below sheep jealous[13].

I see...But you got both of those a bit wrong.

I wondered what Senjougahara would have said if she heard what

Hachikuji was feeling. But I then realized she would likely say
nothing. She would not empathize with Hachikuji despite being
much, much, much closer to being in the same position.

A crab and a snail.

Those kinds of family issues seemed to lead to that kind of thing.

From the way you have been speaking, I get the impression that
you are not too fond of your parents, Araragi-san. Is that so?

Oh, not really. Its just...

I trailed off because I suddenly realized that was not something to

speak of with a child. However, I had already heard a lot about
Hachikujis issues, so it would have been wrong to stop just because
she was a child.

I was a really good kid.

Liar.

Im not lying.
Is that so? Then perhaps it isnt. Lying is a type of dialect, you
know?

You mean for the villagers of the lying village?

I am a villager of the truthful village.

I see. Well, anyway, I may not have spoken as ridiculously politely

as you, but I was reasonably good at my studies, reasonably good at
sports, and I didnt really do any bad things. Also, I did not
pointlessly rebel against my parents like the other boys did. I was
thankful that they had raised me.

Ohh? Most admirable.

I have two little sisters and they were pretty much the same, so we
were really a pretty good family. However, I pushed myself a little
too hard when it came to the high school entrance exam.

Pushed yourself too hard?

......

She was a surprisingly good listener.

Little comments like that were satisfying for the speaker.

I forced myself to take the exam for a school well above my

level...and I passed.

But that is a good thing. Congratulations.

No, it was not a good thing. If I had forced myself and it had
ended there, everything would have been fine. However, I was
unable to keep up. Falling behind in the smart kids school is
nothing to joke about. Also, everyone who goes there is extremely
diligent. People like Senjougahara and me are the exceptions.

For a mass of diligence like Hanekawa Tsubasa to take time to deal

with a student like me, I truly had to have been quite the exception.
She just happened to have the excess ability to cover for my lack of
ability.

And then I received a great recoil from how good a kid I had been
up until then. There of course wasnt any specific incident you can
point your finger at, and my parents and I try to keep things the
same at home, but there is still a wordless awkwardness. And once
something like that appears, it has a tendency to stick around.
Thats why weve ended up being overly considerate of each other.
And...

My sisters.

My two little sisters.

Onii-chan, its because youre like this.

Because Im like that, I feel like Im not growing up. It feels like I
will always be a child and never be an adult.

A child? said Hachikuji. So youre the same as me.

I dont think Im the same as you. I mean that even as I grow

physically, I will stay the same on the inside.

Araragi-san, you have a way of saying very rude things to ladies. I

may not look it, but I am one of the most grown kids in my class.
Its true that your chest is quite something.

Hah!? You touched it!? When did you touch it!?

Hachikujis eyes opened wide in shock.

Shit, that slipped out.

Um...when we were fighting.

Thats more of a shock than that you punched me!

Hachikuji held her head in her hands.

It must have been quite a shock indeed.

Yknow...it wasnt on purpose. And it was just for an instant.

Just for an instant!? Really!?

Yeah, and I only touched it about 3 times.

Then it wasnt just an instant! And from the second time on, it had
to have been on purpose!

Not true. It was just an unfortunate accident.

Ive had my first touch taken from me!

Your first touch...?

Is that really a word being used these days?

Elementary schoolers have come a long way since I was a kid.

I cant believe my first touch was before my first kiss. Youve
turned Hachikuji Mayoi into a dirty girl.

Oh, right. Hachikuji-chan, I just remembered that I forgot to give

you the money I promised you.

Please dont bring that up now!

Still holding her head in her hands, Hachikujis entire body writhed
around like she had a paper wasp inside her clothes.

It was quite pathetic.

Cmon, calm down. Its still better than having your first kiss be
from your father, right?

Thats completely normal, though.

Then its better than having your first kiss be with yourself in the
mirror.

No girl in the world has done that.

Yeah.

She was probably right about that.

Grr.

Just as I thought she was about to remove her hands from her head,
she lunged her snapping jaws out toward my neck. She went for the
exact same location the vampire had bitten me over spring break, so
a chill went down my spine. I somehow managed to hold Hachikuji
back by the shoulders and prevented a tragedy from occurring.
Grrrrrrr, she threatened as she tried to bite me.

I was reminded of an enemy character from an old video game (one

that was a metal ball connected to a chain) as I tried to pacify her.

C-calm down, calm down. Theres a good girl.

Dont treat me like a dog! Or is that a roundabout way of calling

me a naughty bitch!?

If anything, Id say youre like a rabid dog.

Her teeth really were a sight to behold. She could bite down hard
enough to reach the bone and, despite the fact that some of them
were surely her baby teeth, not a single one was missing or loose.
Not only did they look nice, but they were strong too.

Araragi-san, you have been quite shameless! I havent seen a single

hint of remorse! Surely you have something to say after touching a
girls delicate chest!

...Thanks?

No! I want you to apologize!

Yeah, but we were in the middle of a fight. It was clearly a force

majeure. In fact, you should be glad it was only your chest. Also, as
Hanekawa said, you were at fault for biting me so hard.

This isnt about who was at fault! Even if I was at fault, I still
underwent a great shock! A grown man apologizes whether he was
wrong or not when faced with a girl who has undergone a shock!
A grown man does not apologize, I said in a low voice. It lowers
the value of his soul.

Thats so cool!!

Or are you saying you wont forgive me unless I apologize? Saying

you will forgive someone if they apologize isnt being tolerant when
they are not on a lower level than you.

Youre criticizing me!? How dare you talk back when youre the
one in the wrong. I truly am mad now. I may be gentle, but if you
push me, Ill turn you into a punching bag!

How is that kind?

And I wont forgive you even if you apologize!

What does it really matter? Its not like you lost anything.

Ah! Araragi-san, what is with this sudden defiance!? And this isnt
about if I lost anything. Not to mention that theyre still growing, so
losing some would be a major problem!

They say they grow if you have them massaged.

Only guys believe in that kind of superstition!

Wow, the world really has become a boring place...

What? Araragi-san, youve been massaging girls' breasts like crazy

based on that superstition? Youre horrible.

Unfortunately, I havent had a single opportunity to do that.

Oh, so youre a virgin.

......

Does this elementary school girl know what shes talking about?

I thought elementary schoolers had come a long way, but thats just too
much.

The worlds isnt boring; its horrible...

I may have been lamenting over the trend the younger generation
seemed to be displaying, but when I thought about it, I had been
aware of that kind of thing when I had been in 5th grade as well.
That was just how ones uncertainty about younger generations
tended to be.

Grr! Grrr! Grrrrrr!

Ah, no, s-stop that! Youre really gonna hurt me!

I was touched by a virgin! Ive been defiled!

It doesnt matter who touched you!

I wanted my first person to be skilled! But instead I got you,

Araragi-san! My dream has been destroyed!

What kind of fantastic delusions do you have!? I was just starting

to feel some guilt and now its all gone!

Grr! Grrrrrrr!

Ahh! Enough of this already! Maybe I was right about you being a
rabid dog! Damn you and your short bangs and your play bites! Im
going to grope you so hard you stop caring about any firsts or
kisses or whatever!

Kyaahh!?

Standing there was a high school boy who had lost control of
himself and was approaching an elementary school girl to use his
greater strength to sexually harass her. I want to believe that he was
not me.

He was, of course.

Luckily, Hachikuji Mayoi put up a much stronger resistance than I

had expected, so I merely ended up with bite marks and claw marks
all across my body and our exchange did not reach its ultimate
destination. For five minutes afterwards, an elementary school girl
and high school boy sat wordlessly on a bench, breathing heavily
and dripping with sweat.

I was thirsty, so I started looking around to see if there was a nearby

vending machine.

Im sorry...

Yeah, Im sorry too...

We both apologized.

It was a shabby compromise.

You seem surprisingly used to fighting, Hachikuji.

I often fight at school.

In scuffles like that? Oh, thats right. In elementary school, it
doesnt really matter if youre a boy or a girl. But that still makes
you pretty rough for a girl...

And yet she had such an intelligent-looking face.

You seem pretty used to fighting yourself, Araragi-san. I guess this

kind of battle is pretty common for a high school delinquent.

Im not a delinquent. I just cant keep up in school.

Correcting that kind of difference seemed pointless.

I basically hurt myself in doing so.

Its a college-prep school, so you dont end up being a delinquent

just because you cant keep up. In fact, we dont even have a
delinquent group.

But in manga and such, the student council presidents of elite

schools are stereotypically quite bad in secret. The smarter they are,
the more vicious a delinquent they make.

Thats one of those stereotypes that ignores reality. Im just used to

that kind of scuffle due to my little sisters.

Oh, your little sisters. You said you have two, right? Are they
about the same age as me?

No, theyre both in middle school. But mentally, they might be

more on your level. Theyre quite young mentally.

Of course, even they dont bite me.

One of them practices karate, so our fights can get quite serious.

They might get along well with you. It isnt that they like kids; its
more like theyre kids themselves. I could introduce you to them if
you like.

No, thats okay.

Oh. For how well-mannered you speak, youre pretty shy. Theres
nothing wrong with that, though. ...I suppose this kind of fight
usually does end when one side apologizes.

Todays fight was one of willpower.

It too would end once I apologized.

And I knew it.

Is something the matter, Arararagi-san?

This time, you doubled the other ra.

Sorry, I bit my tongue.

No, that was on purpose.

I bitw my tonwgue.

It wasnt on purpose!?

It cant be helped. Everyone says things wrong sometimes. Or have

you said everything perfectly from the moment you were born,
Araragi-san?
I cant say Ive done that, but I know I dont say peoples names
wrong.

Then say Namamumi Namamome Namamamamo [14] three times

fast.

Youre not even saying it right.

Ah, namamome sounds so dirty!

Youre the one that said it.

Ah, namamamamo sounds so dirty!

I cant see how...

It was quite an enjoyable conversation.

Yknow, I think namamamamo is actually harder to say than the

original term.

Namamamama!

......

All that tongue biting certainly is keeping her busy.

Anyway, is something the matter, Araragi-san?

Not really. I was just feeling a bit down after thinking about how
to apologize to my sisters.

What are you apologizing for? Groping their chests?

I wouldnt grope my sisters.

So Araragi-san will grope an elementary school girl but not his
sisters? I see. So thats where you draw the line.

Ohh? You have guts to say that. Thats an excellent example of

taking something out of context to slander someone.

I didnt take it out of context.

Really, she hadnt. In fact, I had built up the perfect context for her,
so I felt I probably needed to give quite an apology.

Let me rephrase it then. So Araragi-san will grope an elementary

school girl but not a middle school girl.

This Araragi-san you speak of seems to be quite the lolicon. Hes

certainly the type I wouldnt want to be friends with.

You seem to be implying that you are not a lolicon.

Thats because I was.

From what I have heard, a true lolicon does not view himself as a
lolicon. This is because he sees the innocent little girls as fully
grown women.

Now thats a useless piece of trivia...

Information you would never need to know was just a waste of

space in your brain.

Also, that was not something I wanted to be taught by an

elementary school girl.
In any case, I do not see why them being your sisters would
prevent an accident from occurring in a fight.

I dont want to talk about this anymore. My sisters' breasts dont

count as breasts. They count even less than an elementary school
girls. Just think of it like that.

So that is the way of the breast. I will use the knowledge well.

Please dont use that knowledge. Ever. Anyway, we had a bit of an

argument when I left today. It wasnt a physical fight. It was an
argument. I think I need to apologize even though I didnt do
anything wrong. If I do, this will all be over. I know thats what I
have to do.

Indeed it is, agreed Hachikuji with a sage look on her face. My

parents would always fight. Not physical fights, but arguments.

So thats why they got divorced.

I may just be their daughter, but it seems they originally got along
very well. Before they got married, it seems they were madly in love
with each other. However, I have never seen them getting along.
They always did nothing but fight.

Even so, Hachikuji had not thought they would get divorced.

In fact, she had never even considered it. She had assumed families
stayed together forever. She had not even known such a thing as
divorce existed.

She had not known that her parents would split up.
But that is completely normal. People argue and they fight. They
snap at each other, fall in love with each other, and grow to hate
each other. All of that is completely normal. That is why they
should have worked a little harder to continue to love what they
loved.

Work to continue to love what they loved? I wont go as far as to

say thats dishonest, but it certainly doesnt seem innocent. You
make it sound like love is something that simply requires hard
work.

But Araragi-san, said Hachikuji without giving in. The emotion

we call love is a very proactive thing.

I suppose so.

She was right.

Perhaps it was something you had to put hard work into.

Growing tired of or growing to hate things you love is a painful

thing. Its a boring thing. Normally, if your love for something is at
a 10, your hate for it will be at a 20 once you develop a hatred for it.
That is just so sad.

You love your mother, dont you? I asked Hachikuji.

Yes, I love her. Of course, I love my father as well. I understand

how he feels and I understand that this is not how he wanted things
to end up. Due to everything, my father had it tough. Even if he
only had to be the Daikokuten for one family.

Was your father one of the Seven Gods of Fortune...?

Her father had been a great person.

That had to have made many things difficult.

My parents fought and eventually broke up, but I love both of

them.

Hmm, I see.

And that is why I am worried.

The way Hachikuji cast her gaze down really did make her look
worried.

My father seems to have truly come to hate my mother. He will not

let me see her. He will not let me call her and he said I must never
see her again.

......

I am worried that if I never see her again, I will forget about my

mother and cease to love her.

And that was why.

That was why she had come all the way to this city.

She had no real reason.

She simply wanted to see her mother.

...A snail, hm?

Honestly, why cant a small wish like that be granted?

Whats wrong with it?

I may not have known much about monsters or the lost cow, but I
kept wondering why that snail would get in Hachikujis way.

She could not reach her destination.

She could only continue to wander.

...Hm?

Come to think of it, Oshino said the lost cow is similar to Senjougaharas
crab. What did that mean? That crab was not trying to bring calamity to
Senjougahara. It ended up doing just that, but that was only because, in a
way, Senjougahara had wanted that.

The crab granted Senjougaharas wish.

If this is similar, what does that mean? What if the snail Hachikuji met is
not trying to keep her from her goal?

What if it is trying to grant her wish?

But then what is the snail doing?

What does Hachikuji Mayoi desire?

Looking at it like that, it almost seems like Hachikuji does not want to have
the lost cow driven out.

......

Oh, is something the matter, Araragi-san? Why are you staring at

me like that? Youre going to make me blush.
Oh...its just that...

If you fall for me, you will only get burned.

...What kind of line is that?

My number of meaningless ellipses was increasing.

As you can see, I am a cool biz, so that kind of cool line just sounds
good coming from me.

Its obvious you meant to say cool beauty, but other than that, Im
not sure what to point out first. Actually, if youre cool then why
would I get burned?

Hm, you have a point, said Hachikuji with a serious expression.

In that case, if you fall for me, you will only get low-temperature
burned.

......

That was really lame!

And its still too hot to be cool.

It made it sound like she was the temperature of a hot-water bottle.

It made her sound like a really good person.

Oh, I know. I just have to think outside the box. Araragi-san, what
I need to do is change my catchphrase from cool to something else.
The title of a cool woman just isnt working out. I need to cut my
losses and change it.
I see. Yes, if you do that, you will be getting closer to something
like a catchphrase. In fact, thats pretty much the standard way of
doing it. Its about as common as the title page of a mangas second
chapter already saying its popular. Okay, lets test this out. Youre
switching out cool, so...

Ill call myself a hot girl.

Thats a relief[15].

That makes me sound like a good person!

Just as she made that over the top reaction, Hachikuji seemed to
realize something.

Araragi-san, youre trying to change the subject.

So shes finally seen through me.

Araragi-san, we were talking about why you were staring at me.

Dont tell me you really have fallen for me.

......

She hasnt seen through me at all!

I dont really like having people stare at me, but I do have to admit
that my upper arm is quite attractive.

Thats oddly specific.

Oh, you dont feel anything? Even when you look at this upper
arm? Cant you see the beauty of its shape?

Your body has a beautiful shape?

A healthy beauty maybe.

Oh, youre hiding your embarrassment. You can be surprisingly

cute, Araragi-san. Hm, I need to give you a proper understanding of
this. If you like, you can keep that understanding. Perhaps I will
give out numbered tickets.

Sorry, but I have no interest in a shorty like you.

Shorty!

Hachikuji stared at me with eyes that looked like they were about to
pop out of her head.

Then her head started wobbling like she had anemia.

What an insulting term... Its so horrible that they should ban it in

the near future...

You actually might have a point there.

Im hurt. I was telling the truth when I said I was one of the most
grown kids in my class! Honestly, you say some horrible things,
man-beast.

Man-beast? Did you just now remember that? And I think that
needs banning first.

Then Ill change it to man-like beast.

That makes it sound like Im not actually human!

As someone who had been attacked by a vampire and was now
half-immortal, that was not really something to joke about. It was a
little too on the nose.

Fine, fine. We just have to think outside the box again, Araragi-san.
In this case, we have to change the terms to foreign words. When
terms offend people, they will inevitably be banned. However, once
the Japanese word is banned, a foreign one can be used to continue
on.

I see. Its true that a foreign word tends to have a softer nuance to
it. Its like how lolicon sounds a lot better than pedophile. Okay,
lets try it. If we change them to English, shorty and man-beast
become...

Shortness and the Human Beast.

Damn! I think were on the verge of a new era here!

Yes! The scales have fallen from my eyes!

We were quite the painful duo.

Anyway, Ill take back calling you shorty. ...In fact, you really are
quite something for a fifth grader.

Are you talking about my chest?

Im talking about all of you. But even so, youre still not quite
grown enough to be considered past the elementary school level.
Youre not some super elementary schooler or anything.

I see. I suppose from a high schoolers perspective, an elementary

schooler like me would seem quite slider.
Its true that you would probably corner well.

I was not about to say it outright, but she was quite well grown.

And Im fairly sure she meant to say slender, not slider.

So Araragi-san, why were you looking at me with such passionate

eyes?

I was just...wait, passionate?

If you look at me like that, it makes my diaphragm pound.

Thats the hiccups.

That was a difficult set up.

She may have been testing my ability as the straight man.

Anyway, it was nothing. Dont worry about it.

Oh. Are you sure?

Yeah...I suppose.

Was it actually the opposite?

Despite what she says, deep down does she actually not want to see her
mother? Or does she really want to but is afraid her mother will reject her?
Maybe her mother has already told her not to come see her. From what
shes told me of the situation regarding her family, that seems plausible.

If that was the case, the situation would not be easily resolved.
I would have thought so even if I did not have Senjougaharas
example as reference.

...I detect the scent of another girl.

Senjougahara Hitagi appeared out of the blue.

She had entered the park on my mountain bike.

Shes already gotten used to riding it. She sure is skillful.

O-oh, that was fast, Senjougahara.

Getting back had taken her less than half the time it had taken her to
get there.

It had been so sudden I did not even have time to be surprised.

I made a few wrong turns on the way there.

Yeah, that cram school is surprisingly hard to find. I guess I really

should have drawn a map.

I am a bit embarrassed after the boasting I did.

Oh, right. All that about your memory...

And now you have shamed me, Araragi-kun. You must be a truly
horrible person to gloat like that.

I didnt do anything! This was your own fault!

I was not aware that you were the type to be aroused by

embarrassed girls, Araragi-kun. I will forgive you, though. For a
healthy boy, that much is to be expected.
No, I think that would be decidedly unhealthy!

When I thought about it, I recalled that Oshino had said something
about a barrier around the location of the cram school, so maybe I
really should have been the one to go.

However, Senjougahara Hitagi was boldly playing the role of the

embarrassed party. I doubted she was actually embarrassed though.
After that comment about being aroused by embarrassed girls, I
was the embarrassed one.

I will accept you, Araragi-kun. I will put up with whatever you

would do to me.

Dont all of a sudden pretend to be the exact opposite of your

usual character! It wont do you any good! The range of your
character cant expand any further than it already has! And if you
were actually doing this for my sake, you should instead warn me
whenever I do anything even slightly unhealthy!

It is true that I was not doing it for your sake, Araragi-kun.

I knew it!

As long as it is amusing, I am fine with it.

Now thats more like it!

Also, Araragi-kun, to be honest, taking a few wrong turns is only

one of the reasons I took so long getting there. I also stopped and
ate some lunch.

I was right. You really arent one to betray expectations, are you?
Well, thats fine. Its your decision.
I ate enough for you as well.

Oh, I see. ...Thanks.

Youre welcome. I detect the scent of another girl. After the

slightest possible response to my thanks, Senjougahara returned to
her original line. Was someone else here?

Um...

From the scent...Id say it was Hanekawa-san.

Eh? You can tell?

I was honestly surprised.

I had thought she was merely guessing.

By scent...do you mean makeup? But I dont think Hanekawa was

wearing makeup...

She had been in her school uniform after all. Knowing her, she
probably restricted herself even from lip balm while wearing it.
When wearing that uniform, Hanekawa would never even
accidentally break school rules. She was like a soldier wearing a
military uniform.

I am referring to the scent of her shampoo. Hanekawa-san is the

only one in our class that uses that brand.

Eh, really? Girls can tell that kind of thing?

To a certain extent, said Senjougahara as if it should have been
obvious. Just think of it as the same as how you can tell girls apart
from the shape of their hips and ass.

I do not recall ever using a power like that!

Eh? You cant do that?

Dont act so surprised!

But dont you remember what you said to me the other day? You
have excellent child-bearing hips, so you will surely have healthy
children. Ueh heh heh heh.

Thats just a pervert!

Also, it would take something extraordinary indeed to make me

laugh in such a disturbing way. Not to mention the fact that she did
not have excellent child-bearing hips.

So Hanekawa-san was here.

......

I was afraid.

I wanted to run away.

Yes, she was. She already left, though.

Did you call her here, Araragi-san? Come to think of it, she lives
around here. Did you call her to help guide us?

No, I didnt call her. She just happened to pass by. Just like you.
Hmm. Just like me, you say?

Just like me.

Senjougahara repeated that part.

I suppose that is just how coincidences are. When one occurs, more
are likely to come. Did Hanekawa-san say anything?

About what?

About anything.

...Not really. She just said a few words, rubbed Hachikujis head
and headed off to the library...no, it wasnt to the library. She
headed off somewhere though.

Rubbed her head...hm? I see. Well, I guess that isnt too surprising
with Hanekawa-san.

You mean that she likes kids? Unlike you.

It is true that Hanekawa-san is quite unlike me. Yes, she isnt like
me. Not like me at all. Now, excuse me, Araragi-kun.

Senjougahara then brought her face in close to mine. For an instant,

I wondered what she was doing, but it turned out she was smelling
me. Or rather, she was smelling...

Hmm.

She backed away.

It does not seem you had a love scene here.

...What? Were you checking to see if Hanekawa and I had
embraced? Can you tell how strong the scent is too? Thats
amazing.

That is not all. I now have your scent memorized, Araragi-kun.

You should assume I am monitoring your actions at all times from
now on.

Im not sure I like the sound of that...

I doubted a normal human could actually pull that off though. Even
if Senjougahara did have a stronger than usual sense of smell, it
seemed unlikely.

Wait, did Hachikujis smell not rub off on me during our two fights?
Senjougahara was there during the first one, so she should know even if I
dont mention it. Maybe Hachikuji uses a scentless shampoo. Well, I
suppose it doesnt matter.

So did Oshino tell you everything we need to know,

Senjougahara? Hurry up and tell me what we have to do to get her
to her destination.

To be honest, Oshinos last words had stuck with me.

That is of course if Tsundere-chan tells you everything.

That had led to me being a little forceful as I asked her. Hachikuji

was looking up at Senjougahara with a worried expression.

Finally, Senjougahara said, It seems we had it backwards, Araragi-

kun. Oshino-san says there is something I must apologize to you
about.
Hah? Why are you changing the subject? You really are skilled at
altering the direction of a conversation. What do you mean we had
it backwards? And what do you have to apologize for?

To borrow Oshino-sans words, continued Senjougahara

nonetheless. Even if there is only one proper truth, a different
conclusion can be reached when it is viewed from two different
points of view. In those cases, there is no way to determine which
point of view is correct. There is no way to prove that you are
right.

......

But it is still wrong to simply assume you are wrong. He really has
a way of seeing right through you. I hate it.

What are you talking about? Or rather, what was Oshino talking
about? I dont see what that has to do with this situation.

It seems the way to free oneself from the snail from the lost cow
is quite simple, Araragi-san. If you explain it in words, it is almost
too simple. Oshino-san said you are lost because you go with the
snail. As such, you will no longer be lost if you leave the snail.

You are lost...because you go with the snail?

It was so simple that I did not understand. It seemed like there

should be more to it. In fact, it sounded as if Oshino missed the
mark in a few places. I looked over at Hachikuji, but she showed no
reaction. However, her tightly sealed lips made it seem that
Senjougaharas words had had some kind of effect with her.

She said nothing.

No exorcism or supplication is necessary. This isnt a case of
possession or interference. It is the same as with my crab. And in
the case of this snail, the target is actually the one that approached
the monster. It is not something done subconsciously or
preconsciously. It is something done of the targets own conscious
will. The target is merely sticking with the snail. The target is
following the snail of his own free will. That is why he is lost. So
Araragi-kun, you merely need to leave the snail.

Um, its not me. Its Hachikuji. And that doesnt make sense.
Hachikuji doesnt want to follow the snail. Theres no way she
does.

As I said, we had it backwards.

Senjougaharas tone did not change. It was her usual flat voice. I
could not read any emotion in it.

No emotion showed on her face.

However, she somehow seemed in a bad mood.

In a very bad mood.

The monster known as the lost cow does not make one unable to
reach ones destination. It makes one unable to return from ones
destination.

R-return from?

It blocks ones return path rather than ones path there.

It isnt on the way there. Its on the way back?

Returning...to where?

To your home?

Your visit and...your arrival?

Eh? But that doesnt make sense. I mean it makes sense on its own,
but Hachikuji isnt trying to return home. Shes only trying to reach
the Tsunade household.

And that is why I must apologize to you, Araragi-kun. But at least

let me explain why I did it. I meant no harm and I did not know
what I was doing. I merely assumed that I was wrong.

......

I had no idea what she meant.

But I could tell it had some horribly important meaning.

But can you blame me? For over 2 years, I was not normal. I only
returned to normal just last week. It is only natural that I assumed I
was wrong when something happened.

Um, Senjougahara?

Just like with my crab, the lost cow only appears before those with
a reason. And that is why it appeared before you, Araragi-kun.

I already told you, the snail appeared to Hachikuji, not me.

Hachikuji-chan, was it?

......
Araragi-kun, things were awkward on Mothers Day, you had a
fight with your sisters, and now you do not want to return home.
The thing about this Hachikuji-chan is...

Senjoughara pointed at Hachikuji.

Or I assume thats what she intended to do.

She was actually pointing in the completely wrong direction.

I cannot see her.

In shock, I looked over at Hachikuji.

She was a small, intelligent-looking girl.

Her bangs were short enough to see her eyebrows and she had
pigtails.

She also had a large backpack on her back.

She somehow looked a bit like a snail.

007

Once upon a time...well, it wasnt that long ago. It was only about
10 years ago. Anyway, at that time the end approached for a certain
couples relationship. One husband and one wife. That made two.
At one time, everyone around them had been jealous of them and
no one around them had doubted that they would live happily ever
after. However, in the end, their marriage turned out to be a short
one. It did not last even 10 years.
I do not think it was an issue of right and wrong.

That course of events is fairly normal.

The couple had a young daughter. That was normal as well. As a

result of an argument I cannot bear to repeat, that daughter was
taken in by her father.

At the end of those long, drawn out issues, the couples relationship
did not merely come to an end. It utterly failed. If they had
continued to live in the same house for another year, they might
have even tried to kill each other. At the end, the mother was made
by the father to swear she would never let the daughter see her
again. It did not matter what the law had to say.

She was half forced to swear that.

However, the daughter had a thought.

Was she truly forced?

The daughter was also made to swear by the father that she would
never see her mother again. And that daughter had a thought. The
mother had come to hate the father who she had surely loved so
much before. As such, was it possible that she had come to hate
herself? Otherwise, why would she have sworn that? Even if it was
half forced, what about the other half? But at the same time, the
daughter had said the same thing herself. She too had sworn to
never meet her mother again.

That was it.

Just because she was her mother.

Just because she was her daughter.

That did not mean their relationship would last forever.

Whether they had been forced or not, those words could not be
taken back once they had been sworn. The daughter had been
taught that it was shameless to refer to ones own actions in the
passive voice. She had been taught that by none other than her
mother.

She was then taken in by her father.

She was made to abandon her mothers family name.

However, those feelings faded.

Even the sadness faded.

After all, time was equally kind to everyone.

It was so kind it was cruel.

Time passed and the daughter aged from 9 to 11.

The daughter was shocked.

She realized that she could no longer recall her mothers face. No, it
was not that she could not recall it. She was perfectly able to do that.
However, she was no longer sure that the person she saw in her
minds eye was her mother.

It was the same when she looked at photos.

She was no longer sure that the woman in the photos she kept in
secret were really of her mother.
Time.

Time would make any feeling fade.

It would degrade any feeling.

And so...

The daughter headed out to meet her mother.

It was the second Sunday of May of that year.

It was Mothers Day.

Of course, she did not tell her father of this. Nor did she contact her
mother ahead of time. The daughter had no idea what situation her
mother was in.

What if her mother hated her?

What if her mother felt she was a nuisance?

Or what if her mother...had forgotten her?

That would be quite a shock.

To be completely honest, the daughter did not tell anyone even

her friends about visiting her mother so that she could choose to
abandon the plan and head back home up to the very last second.

And so she headed off to visit her mother.

She neatly bound her own hair and filled her favorite backpack full
of old memories hoping to delight her mother with them. As she
headed out, she gripped a memo with the address written on it in
her hand to make sure she did not get lost.

However, the daughter never arrived.

She never arrived at her mothers house.

Why?

Why?

Really, truly...why?

The light had been green...

That daughter was me, explained Hachikuji Mayoi.

Or perhaps it was more a confession than an explanation.

That apologetic expression and the way she looked like she could
break down into tears at any time left no other word in my mind.

Senjougahara watched.

Senjougaharas expression did not change.

She truly did not show her emotions on her face.

Surely she felt something in that situation.

So youve been lost and wandering ever since?

Hachikuji gave no response.

She did not even look at me.

The one who did not reach her destination now prevents others
from making their way back home. Oshino-san did not say so, but I
am guessing she is something like a ghost haunting a specific area.
That explanation should be good enough for amateurs like us. The
way there and the way back. There and back. A pilgrimage back
and forth. That is what Oshino said Hachikuji is.

The lost cow.

That was why it was the cow that was known as lost and not
something that led others astray.

That was why that was the only thing it could be called.

The monster itself was lost.

But...what about the snail?

Listen, Senjougahara said as if lightly admonishing me. She

must have become a snail after dying. Oshino did not specifically
say anything about haunting a specific area, but he did say she was
a ghost. I suppose that is what he must have meant.

But then...

But I think that is exactly why she is not like a normal ghost. She is
different from what we normally think of as a ghost. And she is
different from the crab as well.

But...

But it made sense. Just as it was called a cow but was not actually a
cow, it being called a snail did not necessarily mean it was in the
form of a snail. She had taken on the essence of a monster by
mistake.

The name represents the body.

The essence of what it is.

Not everything you see is real and not everything you cant see is real
either, Araragi-kun.

Hachikuji Mayoi

Hachikuji the Lost.

The word Mayoi meaning lost originated from the idea of the warp
and the weft becoming frayed together. That was why one kanji for
Mayoi had the thread radical in it and was used to refer to a strong
delusion that prevented the dead from resting in peace. Also, the
second kanji spelling Mayoi in her name referred to any evening
hour but especially those of dusk or what was known as twilight. If
you added the first kanji from her name, the one that meant true,
you ended up with a rare case of it being used as a negative prefix.
In that case, what looked like true dusk was actually an archaic
term used to refer to 2 AM. Yes, the same time known as the Time
of Three Oxes. From there, you were only a step or two away from
cow or snail.

But...then...its just like Oshino said...

Its so...straightforward.

Can you really not see Hachikuji? I mean, shes right here.
I forcibly grabbed Hachikujis shoulders as she hung her head
down. I then turned her toward Senjougahara. Hachikuji Mayoi was
right there. I was touching her. I could feel the warmth of her body.
I could feel how soft she was. When I looked at the ground, I could
see her shadow. When she bit you, it hurt.

When you spoke with her, it was fun.

I cannot. Nor can I hear her.

But before you were...

No, wait.

She hadnt.

Even at the very beginning, she had said I cannot see that.

Araragi-kun, what I saw was you muttering by yourself over by

the sign and finally performing some kind of wild pantomime. I had
no idea what you were doing. However, once I asked you...

Once she asked...

I had explained it all to her.

Oh, thats right. So thats why she didnt take the memo with the address
on it when I tried to hand it to her.

She couldnt see it.

For her, it wasnt there.

But why didnt you say something?

Like I said, I couldnt say anything. I just couldnt. When you were
seeing something I could not, I naturally assumed that I was the one
that was wrong.

......

For over 2 years, the girl known as Senjougahara Hitagi had had a
monster with her.

The thought process of assuming she was the strange one or

assuming she was the one with something wrong was very strongly
rooted in her. Any person that met a monster even once tended to
carry that with them for the rest of their life, for better or for worse.
Usually for the worse. Once you knew that kind of thing existed in
the world, it was impossible to pretend otherwise even against
something powerless.

But that was why Senjougahara had done what she did. She had
finally been freed from her problem, so she did not want to think
that something was wrong with her once more. Nor did she want
me to think something was wrong with her once more. And so she
pretended to see Hachikuji despite not being able to.

She followed my lead.

So thats what happened...

That had been why Senjougahara had seemed to ignore Hachikuji

so much. She had been literally unable to see her. And that was also
why Hachikuji had hid behind my legs to avoid Senjougahara.

Senjougahara and Hachikuji had not exchanged a single word.

Senjougahara, is that also why you volunteered to go to Oshinos
place?

I wanted to ask him what was going on. When I did ask, he
rebuked me...or was he just shocked? No, maybe he laughed.

It was true that the idea seemed almost laughable.

It was so ridiculous, I was actually unable to laugh at it.

So...I was the one that met the snail.

First I met a demon...and then a snail.

Oshino had even said that at the beginning.

It seems monsters that take the form of children especially little

girls are quite common. I have even seen examples in our
Japanese textbook. A kimono-wearing ghost that leaves travelers
stranded in the mountains. A girl that joins in playing with other
children without the children noticing and takes one away with her
after they are done playing. I merely knew too little to have heard of
the lost cow. Araragi-kun, Oshino-san said that the condition to
meet the lost cow is to not wish to return home. That desire is one
that to be a bit pessimistic everyone has at some point or
another. Everyone has issues at home.

...Ah!

Hanekawa Tsubasa.

She had been the same.

Due to the discord and distortion at her home, Sunday was her day
for taking a walk.

She had the same desire as me. In fact, she might have desired it
even more than I did.

That was why Hanekawa had been able to see Hachikuji.

She had seen her, touched her, and spoken with her.

A monster that gives you what you desire...

When you put it like that, it does sound nice. However, you could
also say that it takes advantage of our human weaknesses. For
instance, I doubt you truly wished you would never return home,
Araragi-kun. That is why I think it should be called a reason rather
than a desire.

......

But, Araragi-kun, that is why the way of dealing with the lost cow
is exceedingly simple. I already told you, remember? You just have
to stop following it. You have to leave it. That is all.

You follow it of your own free will and get lost.

It made sense. If you followed the snail that would never arrive
anywhere, there was no way you could ever return home.

If you explained it in words, it was so simple.

You just had to leave the park exactly as Hanekawa had.

If you left, you could leave.

Only those who went with her could not leave.

Even if people said they did not want to return home, they had
nowhere to return but home.

It is not all that terrible a monster, nor is it all that powerful. It

causes no major harm. That is what Oshino-san said. The lost cow is
nothing more than a slight prank, a slight mystery. And so...

So? I asked, cutting her off.

I could not bear to hear any more.

So what, Senjougahara?

......

That isnt it. That isnt it at all. I understand what youre saying,
Senjougahara. It nicely resolves the odd feeling all of this gave me.
But that isnt what I wanted to ask Oshino about. Im grateful for
everything he told us, but that isnt what I truly wanted to know.
That isnt why I had you go all the way to see him.

Then what did you want to know?

I wanted... My hands holding Hachikujis shoulders tightened. I

wanted to learn how to get Hachikuji to her mothers place. Thats
all. From the very beginning, that was all I wanted. I dont care
about all that useless knowledge. All that trivia is a waste of space
in my brain. All of that isnt whats important.

It was not about Araragi Koyomi.

It was all about Hachikuji Mayoi.

It was not an issue where I could just leave her and be done with it.

I could not leave her no matter what.

Dont you understand, Araragi-kun? She is not actually there. She

does not actually exist. This Hachikuji...Hachikuji Mayoi-chan, was
it? She is already dead. She is no longer normal. She has not been
possessed by a monster. She is the monster.

So what!? I shouted.

I shouted at Senjougahara.

Shes not normal? Who is!?

......

You, me...and Hanekawa Tsubasa.

Nothing lasts forever.

And yet...

O-ow, that hurts, Araragi-san.

Hachikuji struggled helplessly in my arms. As my grip had

strengthened, my nails seemed to have dug into her shoulders.

It seemed to hurt her.

And so she spoke.

U-um, Araragi-san. That Senjougahara-san is right. I...I...

You be quiet!
No matter what she said, it would not reach Senjougahara.

It would only reach me.

However, in that voice that could only reach me, she had even tried
to tell me she was the lost snail from the very beginning.

She had tried her best to tell me.

And she had said something else.

The very first thing she had said to me.

You couldnt hear it, Senjougahara, so Ill tell you. The first thing
she said to both me and Hanekawa was quite something.

Please do not talk to me.

I hate you.

Do you understand, Senjougahara? She does not want anyone to

follow her, so she has to say that to everyone she meets. Do you
understand how that must feel? Even when someone tries to rub
her head, she has to bite their hand. I cant imagine how that must
feel.

She could not rely on anyone else.

She could not say that she was the monster.

She could not say that she was the strange one.

She simply could not.

But even if I cant, both of us have still experienced similar things.
It may not be exactly the same, but we know what it is like to be all
alone and to not know what to do. Even if it isnt exactly the same,
we have felt the same pain. I became immortal and you had your
body altered by a monster. So I dont care about this lost cow crap
or this snail crap. Even if she says it herself, it changes nothing. You
cant see her or hear her or even smell her, but that is why it is my
duty to see her safely to her mothers place.

...I thought you would say that.

Shouting at Senjougahara had been completely illogical and my

head had gradually been cooling ever since I had begun, so I was
aware what I was saying was ridiculous. However, Senjougaharas
expression had not changed in the slightest.

I have finally seen the real you, Araragi-kun.

...Eh?

It seems I was mistaken about you. No, maybe I wasnt. I vaguely

or perhaps strongly knew this already, but I had an illusion
covering it. That illusion has disappeared. Araragi-kun, last
Monday, my slight mistake led to you learning of my problem. And
within the same day, you called out to me.

I had called out to Senjougahara, telling her I might be able to help

her.

To be honest, I was unable to work out the meaning of that action.

Why had you done that? After all, you gained nothing from it. You
had no stake in saving me, so why? I wondered if perhaps you had
done it because it was me.
......

But that was not why. That seems clear now. Araragi-kun, you will
simply save anyone.

Save? Thats too strong a word. Dont exaggerate. Anyone would

have done the same. And as you said before, I just so happened to
have had a similar problem and happened to know Oshino, so...

Even if you had not had a similar problem and even if you had not
known Oshino-san, you would have done the same thing, wouldnt
you have? From what Oshino-san told me, you would have.

What did that bastard tell her?

Im betting it was some kind of half-truth.

At the very least, I do not think I would go up and talk to a strange

elementary school student just because I saw her in front of a map
twice.

......

When you are alone for so long, you begin to think you are special.
When you are alone, you are indeed not a part of the masses.
However, you are merely not a part of them. That does not make
you special. Its almost laughable. Plenty of people learned of my
problem in the two years after I met that monster, but the only one
that actually did anything about it was you, Araragi-kun. You were
the only one that was like you.

Well, no one else is me.

Yes, exactly.
Senjougahara gave a slight smile.

Also, while she had likely only just so happened to get the angle
right, Senjougahara Hitagi looked directly at Hachikuji Mayoi.

I have one last message from Oshino-san. He predicted that you

would say what you did, so because he claims to be very, very
kind he gave me a secret trick to use for this situation.

A-a secret trick?

He really does see right through us. And yet I cannot tell what that
man is thinking at all. Well, lets go.

Senjougahara then straddled the mountain bike. Her motion was

smooth as if to say the bike was already hers.

Go? Go where?

To the Tsunade household of course. As good citizens, we must

see Hachikuji-chan on her way. Come with me. I will lead the way.
Oh, and Araragi-kun...

What?

I love you.

......

Her tone had not changed even slightly.

......

After thinking for a few more seconds, I realized I was the first boy
in Japan to have a classmate confess her love for him in English.
Congratulations, said Hachikuji.

In about every possible way, that comment had been out of place
and had missed the mark.

008

And an hour later, Senjougahara, Hachikuji, and I arrived at the

location of the address on that memo. We arrived at the place the
girl Hachikuji Mayoi had been in life had headed for on that
Mothers Day.

It had taken quite some time.

And yet it had been so easy.

But...this is...

However, it did not seem out of place.

The sight before my eyes did not seem out of place.

Senjougahara, are you sure this is the place?

Yes, I am sure.

Her assertion left no room for argument.

This was Hachikujis mothers house, the Tsunade household.

It had become a completely empty lot.

It was surrounded by a fence and signs saying Private Property
and No Unauthorized Entrance were staked into the bare ground.
The rust on the edges of the signs made it clear that they had been
sitting there for quite some time.

Land development.

Rezoning.

It had not been turned into a road like Senjougaharas old house,
but since no trace of the house remained, it was essentially the
same.

...How could this happen?

What that shut-in Oshino Meme had suggested as a secret trick for
our situation had been something so simple it made you think Is
that all?. Whether you called it the lost cow or the snail, the
classification of monster it fell under was a ghost. For that reason,
she essentially did not accumulate informational memories.

Apparently, it was standard for that kind of monster to not exist.

She was an existence that did not exist as an existence.

If no one was here to see her, she was not there.

To explain it using what happened today, Hachikuji had suddenly

appeared and begun to exist the instant I sat on that park bench and
looked over toward the sign. Or so Oshino had said.

In the same way, Hachikuji must have suddenly appeared when

Hanekawa had looked on the bench next to me when she passed by
the park. As a monster, she did not have a continuous existence.
Instead, she appeared the instant she was seen. In that way, the lost
cow was not something you met in quite the same way as other
monsters.

She was only there when someone was looking there. The observer
and the observed. Hanekawa would likely have given a detailed
and apt analogy from her scientific knowledge, but I could not think
of anything appropriate. Senjougahara probably could, but she did
not mention it.

At any rate, she had no informational memory. In other words, no

knowledge.

She had of course been able to lead someone unfamiliar with the
land like me astray, but she had also been able to do so to
Senjougahara who could not even see her. She had even been able
to cut off the signal of Senjougaharas cell phone. And as a result,
the target would forever be lost.

However.

She did not know what she did not know.

And even if she did know, there was nothing she could do about it.

For instance, the rezoning.

The cityscape had changed so much in just the past year, so the
differences from 10 years before had to have been quite something.
We did not take a shortcut, we did not take some roundabout way,
and we did not head straight there.

By choosing a route made up entirely of new roads a monster like the

lost cow was unable to deal with it.
Monsters did not age. A little girl monster would always be a little
girl.

She would never grow up and be an adult.

So youre the same as me.

Hachikuji had been in the 5th grade 10 years before, so she should
really be older than Senjougahara and me. And yet she spoke of her
memories of fighting at school like they had happened yesterday.
She truly did not have standard memories.

She did not.

They were simply not there.

And so...

Apparently, Oshino had said it was like putting new wine into old
wineskins.

That unpleasant man had seen through to the truth. He could not
see Hachikuji, he had not heard that much about our issues, and he
did not even know much about this town, and yet he had acted like
he knew everything.

Nevertheless, his words had led to our success.

We chose an amidakuji-like path following the newly constructed

roads that had the nice dark asphalt. As much as possible, we
avoided the old roads or the roads that had merely been newly
paved. We even used the road that passed through where
Senjougaharas house had been. We finally reached our destination
after an hour.
The area should have been only a 10 minute walk from that park
and it was probably only 500 meters as the crow files, but it still
took us over an hour.

We made it to the destination.

We finally made it.

But it was merely an empty lot.

I guess everything cant go perfectly...

Yes.

With how much everything had changed, it would have simply

been too perfect for the destination alone to remain unchanged.
Even Senjougaharas house had become a road in less than a year.
Also, our strategy to get there would have been useless if there had
been no new road right up next to the destination. The possibility of
the destination itself having changed should have been obvious
from the beginning. But at the same time, having it not go so
perfectly seemed to make it all a waste. It felt like it had lost all
meaning. If the very end was a failure, it had all been a failure.

I guess not everything goes the way you want it to.

I guess not every dream comes true.

If the destination is gone, wont the lost cow truly be forced to wander
forever? Wont she truly be a lost snail that circles around and around and
around without end?

How horrible.
Oshino, that bastard with the psychedelic Hawaiian shirt, might
have seen this very ending coming. And yet or perhaps because of
that he had...

Oshino Meme had such a frivolous way of speaking. He would

never give parting words, he would never give you an answer to a
question you did not ask, he would not act unless you asked him to,
and he would not necessarily do so even if you did.

He was fine with not saying things he really should have.

U-uuhh...

I heard Hachikuji sobbing next to me.

I had barely been able to contain my shock at the sight before me, so
I had completely forgotten about Hachikuji. When I should have
been concerned with her, I had been lost in thought. I finally turned
toward her.

Hachikuji was crying.

However, her head was not hanging down. She was staring
forward.

From the angle of her gaze, she seemed to be looking at the house
that was no longer there.

U-uuhh... Ahhh...

And then...

Hachikuji moved from my side and ran forward.

Im home!

Oshino had likely seen all the way to that ending and would likely
say it had been obvious.

He was a man who did not say what he really should.

Honestly, I just wish he had told me from the very beginning.

I wondered what Hachikuji could see now that she had arrived.

Senjougahara and I could only see an empty lot. The area had
completely changed, but what did the lost cow, Hachikuji Mayoi,
see there?

What had appeared there for her?

Development and alterations to the land meant nothing.

Not even time mattered.

The girl with the large backpack quickly dimmed, grew hazy,
thinned, and then suddenly disappeared from my vision.

I could no longer see her.

She was gone.

But the girl had said Im home. That place was no longer her
separated mothers house and it no longer had any connection to
her. It was now nothing but her destination, but she had still said
Im home.

It seemed she had arrived home.

I felt that was a lovely end of the story.

A truly lovely end.

Well done, Araragi-kun. You were fairly cool, said Senjougahara

finally.

Her voice had almost no emotion in it.

I didnt really do anything. Really, you were the one that did all
the work this time, not me. I wouldnt have even been able to pull
off that secret trick alone. Your knowledge of the area was
necessary.

That may be true, but that is not what I meant. I was surprised that
it had become an empty lot, though. Perhaps the entire family
moved when the daughter was killed in a traffic accident on her
way to visit. Of course, I can think of plenty of other reasons.

Yeah, and come to think of it, we dont even really know if

Hachikujis mother is even still alive.

Or her father for that matter.

I suddenly realized that Hanekawa might have actually known. It

had seemed the Tsunade household had perhaps rung a bell with
her. If she had known that the house no longer existed for some
reason, she was the type to keep silent about it. At the very least,
she was not an extreme stickler for the rules.

She was merely fair.

At any rate, the issue seemed to be resolved.

It seemed to have ended much too quickly. I then noticed the
Sunday sun beginning to set. It was mid May, and the days were
still short. I had to get home soon.

Just like Hachikuji had.

I also realized that it was my turn to make dinner.

Well, Senjougahara. Lets head back to get the bike.

Senjougahara had originally tried to lead us on the mountain bike,

but she had quickly realized the uselessness of a mountain bike
when travelling with those walking and that it became something
she just had to push along as she walked. And so she had left the
bike at that park.

Yes. By the way, Araragi-kun, said Senjougahara who was still

looking toward the empty lot. You still have not given me a
response.

......

A response?

For that, you mean?

Um, Senjougahara. About that...

Just so you know, Araragi-kun, I hate romantic comedies where it

is obvious the two will get together at the end but lukewarm
developments keep them at an in-between more-than-friends-less-
than-lovers state chapter after chapter just to keep the story going.

...I see.
Incidentally, I also hate sports manga where each match takes an
entire year and yet you know they are going to win in the end. I also
hate battle manga where it is clear they will defeat the final boss
and bring peace to the world, but the battles with weaker enemies
go on forever.

I think you just covered every shounen manga and shoujo manga
in existence.

So what will you do?

She was not giving me a chance to think.

The atmosphere made it clear I could not evade giving a proper

answer. I am betting not even a boy who is confessed to by a girl
who has all of her friends around her would feel as oppressive an
atmosphere.

Um, I think youre a bit mistaken, Senjougahara. Or maybe youre

being a bit impatient. It is true that I helped to resolve your problem
last Monday, but if you act like you owe me some huge favor...

Oh, are you perhaps worried about that ridiculous theory that says
people are more likely to fall into a romantic relationship in
dangerous situations while ignoring human reasoning and giving
no thought to the fact that extremely dangerous situations have a
way of revealing the true nature of ones comrades?

Ridiculous? Well, I suppose youre right. Youd have to be an idiot

to confess your love to someone while on some dangerous
suspension bridge or something. But I still think youre feeling too
much of a debt of gratitude toward me. To be honest, whatever the
situation or circumstances were, I dont feel right having you feel so
indebted to me.
That was just a pretext. By giving you the initiative, I hoped to get
you to confess to me. That was why I said that. You lost your
chance, you foolish boy. That is the last time I will set someone up
like that.

......

Now that was a bold statement.

And is that what she was doing?

Was she trying to tempt me?

Do not worry. I do not actually feel such a great debt toward you,
Araragi-kun.

...Is that so?

Eh?

Are you sure?

After all, you would save anyone. This morning, I did not have
quite as strong a grasp of who you are as I do now, Araragi-kun,
said Senjougahara smoothly. It is clear now that you did not save
me because it was me, but that does not matter to me. Even if it had
not been me that you saved for example, if you had saved
Hanekawa-san and I had only watched on from the sidelines I
believe I would have still felt that you are special. Even if I am not
special, knowing that you are special is just so much of a thrill. Well,
that might be exaggerating a bit, but if anything, you are certainly
fun to speak with, Araragi-kun.

But...we havent talked all that much yet.

It was worse than that.

Because of the very concentrated amount of time we had spent

together last Monday, last Tuesday, and that Sunday, I almost
overlooked the fact that we had only ever spoken on those three
days.

It had only been three days.

Even if we had been in the same class for three years...

We were practically strangers.

Thats right, said Senjougahara with a nod of agreement. And

that is why I want to speak with you more.

She wanted to spend more time with me.

So that she could get to know me better.

So that she could fall in love with me.

I do not think this is anything quite as cheap as love at first sight

and I am not patient enough to build up all the necessary
groundwork. However, I still feel a desire to put effort into loving
you, Araragi-kun.

...Is that so?

When she put it like that, she was right.

I could find nothing to say in return.

You had to work to continue to love someone. Love was a very
proactive emotion. In that case, doing things as Senjougahara
suggested was fine.

I believe this is an issue of timing. Merely becoming friends might

have been enough, but I am greedy. I only want to go for the
absolute extreme. Just think of it as having gotten stuck with a
horrible girl, she said. It is because you are kind to anyone and
everyone that this is happening to you, Araragi-kun. This was your
own doing. Oh, and you need not worry. I am perfectly capable of
distinguishing between gratitude and certain other feelings. After
all, I have imagined all sorts of things involving you over the past
week.

Imagined...?

It has been a very fulfilling week.

She had a very blunt way of saying things.

I had to wonder just what I was doing and having done to me in

these imaginings of Senjougaharas.

If you prefer, you can think of it as being unfortunate enough to

have caught the eye of an easily love-struck fairy tale maiden who is
starved for love and will do anything for anyone who is even
slightly kind to her.

...I see.

You were unlucky. You should curse your normal actions.

Does she not even hesitate to put herself down?

And after having all that said to me...

Even that...

...God, Im lame.

Im just pathetic.

And Araragi-kun, now that I have said all that...

What?

If you refuse me, I will kill you and then run away.

Thats just a normal murder! You need to die too!

Thats just how normally serious I am.

...Sigh. I see...

As I thought over what she said, I sighed from the bottom of my

heart.

Honestly...

She is quite fun to be around.

It felt like a waste to have spent only those three days of the past
three years with her. I, Araragi Koyomi, had wasted so much time.

I was truly glad that I had been the one to catch her back then.

I was so glad that Araragi Koyomi had been the one to catch
Senjougahara Hitagi.
If you cowardly ask for time to think about this, I will forever hold
you in contempt, Araragi-kun. You should not embarrass girls any
more than is necessary.

I know, I know. It might not be my place to do so, but can I add a

single condition to this?

What would that be? Do you want to watch me shave my excess

hair for a week?

Of all the things youve said so far, that is certainly the worst!

And that was due to both what she said and when she said it.

After a few seconds, I spoke to Senjougahara.

I say a condition, but I guess its more of a promise...

A promise? What would that be?

Senjougahara, never, ever again pretend to see something you do

not see or pretend not to see something you do see. Never again. If
anything seems odd, say so. Dont try to be considerate. Due to
what weve experienced and what we know, we will likely have to
bear this burden for the rest of our lives. We know of these things
existence, so promise me you will tell me on the spot if it seems
there is a discrepancy in how we view something.

I promise.

Senjougahara had her usual composed face with no readable

expression, but I could still sense something from that short,
immediate response that could be taken by some as having been
made without proper consideration.
It was my own fault.

It was due to the normal actions I took.

Okay, lets go. Its gotten pretty dark, so...um...I guess the normal
protocol would be for me to see you home.

Two people cannot ride on that bike.

It has those rods, so two should be fine even if three would be

impossible.

Rods?

The rods you put your feet on. I dont know what theyre called,
but theyre attached to the back wheel. One of us can stand on them
and put their hands on the others shoulders. We can decide who
sits in front with a game of rock paper scissors. The snail is gone, so
we should have no problems returning home. The way we came
was way too complicated to remember, so Senjougahara...

Wait, Araragi-kun.

Senjougahara was still standing in the same place.

While standing there, she grabbed my wrist.

Senjougahara Hitagi had restricted herself from coming into contact

with others for so long, so that was the first time she had ever
reached out and touched me like that.

We touched each other.

We looked at each other.

And that showed that we were there.

We could each tell the other was there.

Perhaps we should actually put it in words.

Put what in words?

I do not want an assumed relationship.

Oh, that.

I thought.

For a girl that desired the absolute extreme, merely replying in

English would have lacked something. However, my limited
knowledge of other languages would have made any other
language seem half-hearted and it would still be a rehash.

And so...

I hope it catches on.

What?

Senjougahara tore[16].

In a general sense, that made Hanekawas delusion 100% accurate.

It seemed that class rep really did know everything.

 009

This is the epilogue, or rather the conclusion, to this story.

As usual, my two little sisters, Karen and Tsukihi, woke me up.

That they came to wake me up showed that my words of apology
that were almost an unconditional surrender had been successful
and their anger had been quelled. In the end, I had been unable to
do anything that year, but I promised I would definitely not leave
the house all day next Mothers Day. That may have been a good
thing. At any rate, it was Monday. A wonderfully normal weekday
on which nothing would occur. I ate a light breakfast and headed
for school. I was not on my mountain bike. I was using the ladies
bike. As I thought about the fact that Senjougahara would finally be
attending school again, my feet felt light as they pedaled. However,
on a downslope not far from my house, I almost ran into a girl
unsteadily walking along. I frantically braked.

The girl had bangs short enough to see her eyebrows and had
pigtails.

She was wearing a large backpack.

Oh, Araragi-san.

You got the two ras backwards.

Sorry, I stuttered.

What are you doing here?

Oh, um, how to put this...

The girl had the confused expression of a ninja that had failed a
camouflage technique and then gave an embarrassed grin.

Well, you see. Thanks to your help, Araragi-san, I moved up from

being a ghost that haunts a specific area to being a wandering ghost.
I got a special promotion up two levels.

Hehh...

I was shocked.

That wonderfully absurd logic was so vague and arbitrary that an

expert like Oshino (as frivolous and flippant as he could be) would
probably faint if he heard it.

It may have meant nothing to her, but I was in a position where I

had to constantly be thinking about my attendance rate, so I needed
to get to school before I was late. As such, I said see ya and got
back on my bike after we had exchanged only a few words.

And then she said one last thing.

Um, Araragi-san. I am going to be wandering around this area for

a while, said that girl. So call out to me if you see me.

In the end, it was quite a wonderful story.

 Suruga Monkey

001

Kanbaru Suruga was so well known in our school that I doubted a

single student had not heard of her, so I of course had heard about
her a few times. If we are merely talking about being well known,
my classmates Hanekawa Tsubasa and Senjougahara Hitagi may
have been even more so than her, but that was only within the third
year. Yes. Kanbaru Suruga was in the second year, a year below
Hanekawa Tsubasa, Senjougahara Hitagi, and myself. And yet she
was so well known that even someone as ignorant of the current
gossip as me had heard of her despite being in the third year.
Normally, that would be unthinkable. If I jokingly said she was
quite something for her age, I would be a little too close to the truth
for comfort.

Also, in Kanbaru Surugas case, calling her a star may give a more
accurate nuance of meaning than just calling her well known.
Hanekawa Tsubasa and Senjougahara Hitagi were known as
excellent students with superb grades and wonderful behavior
(even if the latter was not actually that way at all), but Kanbaru
Suruga was not seen that way in the slightest. As the term star
would suggest, neither was she well known for being a bully nor a
delinquent girl. While Hanekawa Tsubasa and Senjougahara Hitagi
excelled mainly at academics, she excelled at sports. Kanbaru
Suruga was the ace of the basketball team. Soon after she joined the
team in her first year, she became a regular. Now, that could be
explained away by the fact that the girls basketball team was
completely unknown and weak when she had joined it. In fact, it
had never won a single game. However, she had created a
monstrous legend by leading that unknown and weak basketball
team that had never won a single game to the nationals starting
with the first regular game after she joined. After that, it was hardly
surprising she was treated like a star. That legend had seemed to
practically appear overnight, so it seemed like she had almost
literally created it and it made you wonder what exactly she had
done. Our schools girls basketball team was now such a strong
team that the requests from boys basketball teams from nearby high
schools no longer seemed like jokes. Their rapid rise to prominence
had been due to the strength of a single girl.

She was not particularly tall.

Her physical condition was not all that different from a normal high
school girl.

If anything, she was a little petite and slender.

Graceful was about the perfect word for her.

However, Kanbaru Suruga could jump.

Last year, due to a bit of socializing, I had just once seen a bit of a
game she played in. She had quickly and nimbly slipped past (or
rather, right through) the opposing teams defenses and easily
landed a slam dunk just like that shounen manga that had once
swept across Japan. She had calmly and easily done it over and over
again with the invigorating smile of a sports girl. As she did it
dozens of times, she had truly seemed to be enjoying it. How many
high schoolers get to see someone dunk in a girls basketball game
where shooting with both hands is the norm? Even as a spectator, I
had been overwhelmed. I had been unable to continue to watch the
poor opposing players who had lost all motivation due to also being
overwhelmed. I distinctly remember having no choice but to leave
because it was so hard to watch.
Anyway, even if our high school was a college prep school that
gave academics the primary focus, it was still a school attended by
emotional youths partway through their teenage years. It was only
natural that a flashy sports hero garnered more attention than an
excellent student that was good at her studies. The things Kanbaru
Suruga did or the actions she took became gossip that spread
around the school whether they were things that mattered in the
slightest or not. If you gathered up all of that gossip, you could
probably write an entire book. Even if you didnt particularly care
or if you actively tried to avoid it, you would still hear things about
Kanbaru Suruga. Any student at our school regardless of year could
quickly learn what she had eaten for lunch if he cared. It was
simple. You just had to ask anyone around you.

But gossip was filled with rumors.

And with half truths.

Nothing guaranteed that these things were true.

The rumors that managed to make their way all the way to me were
especially lacking in credibility and difficult to accept at face value.
In fact, oftentimes rumors that were the exact opposite of each other
would be making their way around the school at the same time. She
had a wild temperament...no, a calm one. She was very caring of her
friends...no, she was cold and unfeeling. She was very modest...no,
she was very boastful. She had intense romances...no, she had never
even dated a guy. If anyone was able to fulfill all of those things, I
would only be able to say that their personality was completely
broken. I had never spoken to her even when I did catch sight of her
and had never actually been within 5 meters of her, so I had no
choice but to leave it all to my imagination. Although to be honest, I
really felt no need to go to the effort of imagining anything about
her. She was in a different year, a sports star, and the ace of the
basketball team (our school only allowed club and team activities
through the second year, so the rumor that she had been designated
the team captain was probably legitimately true), so she had no
connection whatsoever to a third year student who had fallen
behind in his studies.

She had no connection or relation to me.

In all likelihood, she probably had never even heard of me.

There was no reason she would have.

That was what I had thought.

That was what I had been convinced of.

I learned that I had been mistaken near the end of May when the
time to switch over to our summer uniforms in June was
approaching fast. It was during the time when I was considering
putting a bandage on my neck for about half a month because the
back of my hair I was growing out did not quite come down far
enough to hide two small holes there. It was about 10 days after
Senjougahara Hitagi and I had started going out after that sudden
opportunity.

When Kanbaru Suruga had first approached me with those loud

footsteps, she already had that white bandage wrapped around her
left hand.
 002

Oh, Aryaryagi-san.

Its Araragi.

Sorry, I bit my tongue.

While returning from school on a Friday, I caught sight of a small

pigtailed girl wearing a backpack, namely Hachikuji Mayoi, ahead
of me as I pedaled my bike along a slope. I braked and called out to
her as I stopped to her left. Hachikuji blinked and looked surprised
before misspeaking my name as usual.

I was a bit impressed she was still coming up with new ways of
saying my name wrong, so I politely corrected her.

Dont say peoples names like youre Ukkari Hachibei.

I think its cute.

It makes me sound utterly incompetent.

Hmm. Well, thats surprisingly fitting.

That fifth grader had a way of saying horrible things without a

second thought.

Araragi-san, Im glad you seem to be doing well. I am glad I am

able to meet you again like this. Has anything happened since
then?

Hm? Oh, not really. That kind of thing doesnt happen too often.
Ive had a nice, peaceful life. Things have been quite calm. Although
we do have an exam coming up, so it really isnt that peaceful or
calm.

About two weeks before on May 14th aka Mothers Day, I had met
Hachikuji Mayoi in a certain park which led me to being caught up
in a bit of an incident. Nothing of enough substance to really call it
an incident may have happened and nothing abstract worth
mentioning had happened, but I did have a bit of an unusual
experience.

By unusual, I simply mean unusual.

Thanks to that unpleasant man Oshino and Senjougaharas help I

saw the issue resolved without further problems. However, if I
viewed the events of May 14th as inevitable rather than something
that happened by chance, then the two peaceful and calm weeks of
nothing happening afterwards also seemed to have been inevitable
rather than happening by chance.

From what I could see, Hachikuji was fine too. That meant the
events of that Mothers Day had been resolved without leaving any
loose ends. For such unusual experiences, that was actually quite
rare. For Hanekawa, Senjougahara, or me, dealing with the
aftereffects of the unusual experience was much harsher than the
experience itself. You could even call it cruel.

Hachikuji Mayoi.

In that way, I was a bit jealous of her.

Oh, what seems to be the matter, Araragi-san? Why were you

looking at me with such passionate eyes? Its so indecent.

...How are my eyes passionate?

And theyre indecent?

That isnt a kind of passion I want.

If you look at me like that, Ill get the hiccups.

You have an odd diaphragm.

It surprised me.

If you thought about what Hachikuji had been through, it was not
something I should feel only jealousy toward. If you looked at it in a
certain way, Hachikuji may have even had a harder time than
Hanekawa, Senjougahara, or me. Im sure a lot of people would feel
that was the proper way to look at it.

As I thought, two high school students passed by the left side of my

bike. They were both girls. They wore the uniform of a high school
different from my own. They were clearly looking at Hachikuji and
me suspiciously. The whispering voices I heard as they passed left
me with an unpleasant feeling. Apparently, the sight of third year
high school student Araragi Koyomi speaking with fifth year
elementary school student Hachikuji Mayoi appeared very strange
to people with normal tastes.

But I did not care.

The cold glare of the world meant nothing to me.

I had not called out to Hachikuji thoughtlessly and she and I were
the only ones that needed to know the truth. The friendship we had
developed would not be shaken by such prejudice.
Oh, dear. It seems those girls have figured out that you are a
lolicon, Araragi-san. They have seen through to your true desire.

I dont want to hear that from you!

There is no need to be embarrassed. There is no law against liking

little girls. People are free to have whatever tastes they wish to have.
As long as you do not actually carry out any of your abnormal
desires, there is no problem.

Even if I did like little girls, I would hate you!

It seemed we had not developed a friendship after all.

Everyone around me was like that.

I glanced over my shoulder.

I did not see anyone there.

For the moment at least.

Really... Everything you say and do makes it seem you have great
promise. Anyway, Hachikuji, what are you doing wandering
around here? Were you trying to get somewhere and got lost
again?

That is a very rude thing of you to say, Araragi-san. I have never

once gotten lost from the moment I was born.

You have quite the wonderful memory.

Stop, youre going to make me blush.

Yes, it truly would be wonderful to forget anything you find to be
unfavorable.

No, no. By the way, who are you?

You forgot me!?

That was a nice retort.

She had good taste.

I mean, even when I know its a joke, having someone forget you is
fairly depressing, Hachikuji.

It cant be helped. I forget anything I find to be unintelligent.

Im not stupid enough that you have any right to say anything
about it! And I said unfavorable, not unintelligent!

It cant be helped. I forget anything I find to be unfavorable.

Yes, yes. Youve got it now...wait! No, you dont! Dont call other
peoples mere existences unfavorable!

Youre the one that said it.

Quiet. Dont try to make this my fault.

You sure are selfish, Araragi-san. But okay. I will be more careful
about what I say in the future. For instance...

For instance?

I will instead say you are anti-favorable.

......

It was an enjoyable conversation.

In truth, I did have a slight issue with the fact that I, the third year
high school student named Araragi Koyomi, was speaking on the
same level as a fifth grader. However, it did not feel too different
from speaking with my middle school aged sisters. And if you did
not get too worked up over the difference between middle school
and elementary school, my conversations with Hachikuji
progressed much more smoothly than those with my sisters.

With a sigh, I got off my bike.

I then walked along pushing the bike via the handlebars.

Speaking with Hachikuji was enjoyable, but if we merely stood

around joking, it could ruin my later plans. It wasnt like I was
pressed for time, but I still felt it was better to keep moving while I
spoke with Hachikuji. Hachikuji did not seem to be wandering
around because she had a set destination, so she walked alongside
my bike without my needing to say anything or urge her along in
any way. She really did not have much to do.

There was one other reason I was remaining on the move, but
another glance over my shoulder put that other concern at rest for
the time being.

Where are you headed, Araragi-san?

Home for now.

For now? Are you headed out again later?

More or less. If you recall, I mentioned that I have an exam coming
up.

Yes, it will test your ability and therefore your value, right?

Thats taking it a bit far. The point of the exam is merely to see if I
can graduate or not.

I see. So its seeing if you will fail to graduate or not.

......

It meant the same thing, but the nuance was a bit different.

Japanese was a tricky language.

After all, your intelligence is anti-favorable, Araragi-san.

Now I would rather you simply called me unintelligent.

Even if it is true, there are some things you can say and some
things that go without saying.

So theres nothing you cant say!?

Dont worry, Araragi-san. My grades are not too good either, so

were really the same.

......

An elementary school girl was consoling me.

I was the same as an elementary school girl.

I could also sense Hachikuji Mayois casual deception in the fact
that she changed unintelligent to poor grades when referring to
herself.

Honestly, this is a pretty serious issue. If I do poorly on this exam,

I could be in a really bad situation.

Will you be expelled?

It may be a college prep school, but its not crazy enough to expel
people for doing poorly on their exams. In fact, does such a school
even exist? That sounds like a bad joke. Anyway, I think the worst
that could happen is having to repeat the year, but I still would
rather not have to do that.

If I could avoid it, I would.

No, I had to avoid it at all costs.

Hm. Then, Araragi-san, wouldnt that be a good reason to not

head out today? Shouldnt you be staying home and studying?

You say some surprisingly serious things, Hachikuji.

Araragi-san, I would rather you did not say I say serious things.

Youre fine with me saying it was surprising!?

She was quite the entertainer.

You dont need to worry, though. In fact, that makes a good segue,
Hachikuji. Needless to say, I am not headed out for fun or to go
shopping. Im headed out to go study.
Hm? Hachikuji tilted her head to the side solemnly. So you are
headed to the library or somewhere to study? Hmm... Personally, I
feel studying in the comfort of your own room is much more
effective... Oh, Araragi-san, are you attending a cram school?

I guess its more like a cram school than a library, I said. Do you
remember Senjougahara? Her grades were at the top of our year last
year, and she has promised to help me study at her place.

Senjougahara-san...

Hachikuji folded her arms and looked down.

She hasnt forgotten her, has she?

If so, it was more likely due to fear than finding her unfavorable.

Her full name is Senjougahara Hitagi. She was the girl with the
ponytail that was with me before. She helped...

...Oh, that tsundere.

......

Well, it did seem she remembered her.

It seemed that eight letter word that begins with a T and ends with
an E was becoming widely used for her behavior, but I was not so
sure that was a good thing. I decided I needed to ask her about it at
some point. How I responded to her being called that would change
depending on her answer.

She was a wonderfully open-minded person. She showed me the

way while giving me a piggyback ride the entire way.
Youre beautifying your memories!?

It seemed Hachikujis memories of Senjougahara had been a tad

traumatic. Well, given both of their issues, that isnt too surprising.

Hmm, Hachikuji murmured with her arms still folded. But if I

recall, you and Senjougahara-san were...how should I put
this...umm...

Hachikuji seemed to be trying to choose her words carefully. I had a

good idea what she was trying to say, but Hachikuji must have been
hesitant to say it directly, so she was searching for a different way to
say it. It may not have been to the point of curiosity, but I was a
little interested as to how much option a fifth grade vocabulary
would give her, so I merely watched her without offering any help.

Finally, Hachikuji said, You two entered into a romantic contract,

did you not?

Thats a horrible choice!

As expected, I ended up shouting at her.

The exchange had been perfect enough to be straight out of a

textbook.

Huh? Araragi-san, did I say something odd?

Even if none of the words you used were odd on the surface, I
think most people would sense an unpleasant shade of meaning
lurking below the surface.

If you do not like the term contract, Araragi-san, how about

transaction. A romantic transaction.
Thats even worse! Just say it like a normal person!

Fine, I will do as you wish and say it normally. Saying things

normally is a piece of cake for me. Here goes, Araragi-san. You and
Senjougahara-san entered into a romantic relationship.

I guess thatll do.

A romantic relationship?

Thats a fairly old-fashioned term.

Is that what you consider normal?

You may have said you were headed there to study, but isnt that
just an excuse? Are you perhaps actually having a secret romantic
rendezvous?

......

Yet another old-fashioned way of saying it.

There was something seriously off about her vocabulary.

Heading to your lovers house just before an exam that will decide
if you have to repeat a year seems suicidal, Araragi-san.

It decides if I get to graduate or not.

She must have thought I was quite an idiot.

I felt sorry for myself.

And dont call it suicidal.

Then it seems like suicide itself.

It appeared I was being bullied by an elementary school girl.

I felt sorry for myself.

Just so you know, youre grown up enough for me to settle things

once and for all if you push me far enough.

Grown up enough? You mean in the chest and ass? Araragi-san,

what are you hoping to get from an elementary school girls body?

Shut up. Dont try to twist my words around like that.

I struck Hachikujis head.

Hachikuji kicked me back in the shin.

It ended as a draw due to injuries.

We both agreed not to continue to prevent further pain on our own

part.

Anyway, you dont need to worry about that, Hachikuji.

Senjougahara is very strict about this kind of thing.

Shes strict about studying? So shes a harsh teacher? Come to

think of it, she does seem the type that would hate idiots.

Yes, she did say she hates them.

And that was why Senjougahara disliked children.

And that included Hachikuji.

It was possible she disliked me as well.

Also, while were on the subject, Senjougahara was not merely strict
when it came to studying. But I guess thats just how excellent
students are.

So shes just like Sergeant Heartful.

That is one kind-sounding army officer.

Umm, speaking of Senjougahara-sans house, isnt it near the park

from the other-...?

No, Im pretty sure we mentioned it at some point, but

Senjougahara moved from there a while back. I had been to her
place once just a bit before meeting you. Its a good distance away.
Im headed home to switch out bikes before heading there. Actually,
I might be a little more pressed for time than I thought.

If you are in a hurry, I will not hold you up.

No, Im not running late or anything.

Also, even if I was headed to Senjougaharas house, I was headed

there to study, so I was not exactly motivated to get there in a hurry.
I had no idea how much verbal abuse Senjougahara would send my
way if I let her know about that.

But on the other hand...

Senjougahara Hitagi.

Hachikuji was one thing, but Senjougahara had her own way of
being...
Hey, Hachikuji, I started to ask.

And then I heard a noise coming from behind.

A noise.

Specifically, footsteps.

Instead of hearing a series of steps coming toward me with a quick

rhythm, it sounded more like the person was taking a long jump
with each step.

I did not even have time to turn around to check.

Oh, right...

There had actually been one other problem besides the exams
ruining the peace and calm of my life lately.

I had thought I had lost her.

Step step step step step step.

The footsteps grew closer and closer.

As I said, I had no time to turn around.

But at the same time, I couldnt just not turn around.

Step!

As I slowly and reluctantly twisted my body around, she jumped.

She jumped.
Kanbaru Suruga jumped.

Her running long jump sent her farther than just a meter or two.
Her ideal form and perfect arcing trajectory through the air seemed
to ignore the law of universal gravity. As she flew through the air,
she passed directly by the right side of my face.

And she landed.

In that instant, her disheveled hair fell back down to rest on her
head.

She was wearing her uniform.

Needless to say, that would be the uniform of our school.

Her scarf was the yellow of the second year.

By the way, making such a leap in her uniform had caused her skirt
(which was already shortened according the current style) to flip up
about as far as it would go. However, she was wearing spats that
reached down to her knees, so I gained no joy from this fact.

After a slight delay, the skirt fell back down to its normal position.

I suddenly smelled the scent of burnt rubber.

It seemed to be due to the bottom of the very expensive-looking

sneakers she was wearing causing so much friction with the asphalt
of the road. I had to wonder just how ridiculous her athletic ability
was.

And then Kanbaru Suruga, the ace of the basketball team, turned
around.
She had a bit of youthfulness left, but her expression held a gallant
air to it that was a rare sight even in the third year. Her sharp eyes
were looking directly at me.

She held her hand up to her chest as if she was about to make an
oath.

And she gave me a gentle smile.

Hey, Araragi-senpai. What a coincidence.

No coincidence could be this clearly planned!

It was obvious she had been chasing after me.

When I looked around, I realized Hachikuji had completely

disappeared. For how blunt and straightforward she was with me,
Hachikuji Mayoi was a surprisingly shy girl. She had quickly made
up her mind and escaped with extremely light footwork. Really,
anyone would probably run away if they saw an unknown girl
charging their way at full speed. (And from her point of view, it had
likely looked like Kanbaru had been charging straight for her.)

Some friend she is...

Well, whatever.

I looked back toward Kanbaru fully absorbed in nodding

repeatedly in an admiring way.

...What?

Oh, I was just recalling what you said Araragi-senpai. I want to

inscribe it deeply into my heart. No coincidence could be this
clearly planned... It so excellently sums up the situation and sounds
both like it was thought up on the spot and like it wasnt. I guess
this is what they call a quick wit.

......

Yes, you are right, said Kanbaru. The truth is, I chased after you,
Araragi-senpai.

...Yeah, I could tell.

I see. So you could tell. Thats Araragi-senpai for you. You can see
through everything an underclassman like me would be doing. I am
both embarrassed and ashamed, but I am also quite impressed.

......

She was hard to deal with.

I had no idea what kind of expression was on my face at that point,

but whatever it was, Kanbaru Suruga paid it no heed and pointed a
lively smile my way.

Three days before, I had heard those reverberating footsteps

approaching me as I walked down the hallway. Kanbaru Suruga
had then called out to me like it was normal. She had done it so
normally that I had replied normally without even thinking. It was
only after I replied that I realized I was speaking to that well-known
star of the second year. Even someone as detached from the current
gossip as me had heard of her. However, there was no common
point between us. I could think of no connection between us, so I
was quite surprised.
But what had truly surprised me was her personality. It is a bit
difficult to describe, but she has this strange personality or character
that I have never seen in anyone else.

Ever since so, from three days ago to now Kanbaru Suruga had
been following me around. No matter where I was, what time it
was, or how many people were around, I would hear those
footsteps chasing after me.

Breaks between classes are one thing, Kanbaru, but dont you have
practice after school? Should you really be here?

Oh? Youre a sharp one, Araragi-senpai. You dont let the slightest
doubt go by without question. Youre like the protagonist of a
detective novel. Youd send even Philip Marlowe running off in
shame.

Dont praise me so much for pointing out that its odd for a
national-level basketball player to be here at this time of day.

I had no interest in reading a detective novel starring a detective

that would be sent running off in shame by something like that.

Those words were filled with such deep self discipline and you
have not lost sight of a modest attitude as being your second
greatest weapon. I have a bad habit of fooling even myself so there
is much I must learn from you. Ha ha. It has been said since ancient
times that you are influenced by those around you and I feel myself
growing as a human just by being around you, Araragi-senpai. I
guess this is what it means to follow in someones example.

Kanbaru continued to smile.

There was no ill will in her smile.

I had always thought of someone like Hanekawa as being the
representative example of a good person, but perhaps Kanbaru was
what you would get if you took the idea of a good person to its
extreme.

In short, she was worse than Hanekawa.

She was more of a bother than that class rep.

With my hand the way it is, I cant practice, said Kanbaru as she
pointed to her left hand.

Her left hand had a white bandage wrapped around it. Everything
from the tips of her five fingers to the wrist was wrapped up
without a single gap. The long sleeves of her uniform covered it up
so I could not see, but apparently the bandage reached all the way
to her elbow. Shortly before Kanbaru had first called out to me, I
had heard a rumor that she had sprained it weirdly or something
while doing some independent training.

But then, rumors were only rumors.

I had taken it with a grain of salt. After all, it had been hard to
believe that someone with such great athletic ability and flexibility
would get a sprain while training. However, upon actually seeing
the bandage, I decided it may have been true. A scribe would
sometimes miswrite, a kappa would sometimes get swept away,
and a monkey would sometimes fall from the tree.

Since I cant play, I would only be in the way if I was in the gym,
so I am choosing to not participate in practice for now.

But arent you the captain? And even if you arent, wont the
teams morale fall without you there?
I cant believe you would think my team is so reliant on a single
person, Araragi-senpai. My team is not so weak as to lose its spirit
just because I am not there, said Kanbaru in a strong tone.
Basketball is a harsh sport. It is too much for the strength of a
single person. I will admit that I stand out given the role I have with
my position, but I must point out that I can only stand out because
of everyone elses strength behind me. As such, all the praise given
to me should be split up among everyone on the team.

...Yes, I suppose so.

That was the kind of person she was.

You can call her good or virtuous or whatever word you think is
best.

From what I had heard, that was not the first time Kanbaru had
been extremely sensitive to insults pointed at her teammates (even
if the comment had not been intended that way). When she was in
the first year, an upperclassman had said something rude in a
newspaper interview and she had flipped over that
upperclassmans desk...or so the rumor went. (By the way, that
rumor itself was actually untrue, but something similar had
supposedly happened.)

Ha ha, laughed Kanbaru. I get it, Araragi-senpai. You were

testing me to see what kind of captain I am, werent you?

......

What is with that triumphant look?

Please dont look at me like that.

Honestly, Araragi-senpai, if your words were to be written down
for the benefit of future generations, they would have to be written
in all bold to properly capture them. The weight of each one of your
words is just so much greater than that of everyone else. Saying that
persuasion comes from who says it rather than what is said is usually
meant in a negative way, but it would be meant in a positive way if
it was used in reference to you. You need not worry. I have no
intention of skipping out on my duties as captain. I am not so
conceited as to be that negligent. Whether I like it or not, I am well
aware that I am the ace of the team. I left after instructing everyone
what they were to practice. In fact, without me, they can be much
more at ease as they practice. As they say, when the cats away, the
mice will play.

The cat, hm? ...Well, that is a relief to hear.

It may be a sport, but we are still primarily students. And ours is a

college prep school. The clubs and teams are primarily meant to
create good memories during ones teenage years, so it is best for
them to be friendly, carefree, and open. You really are a considerate
person to not only worry about the issues of someone unrelated to
you like me but also my teammates. I am truly thankful for your
heartfelt concern. You have such an open heart. I cant believe you
would go so far as to play the part of the hated insulter for the sake
of the basketball team. That is a truly kind thing to do for your
underclassmen. I have never met someone as kind as you, Araragi-
senpai.

And Ive never met someone quite like you...

I was fairly certain a character that unwittingly made such insulting

compliments had never before existed.
I see. It is such an honor to have you say that, Araragi-senpai. Ha
ha. Praise from someone as gracious as you is so inspiring. I feel
courage I know I did not have before welling up within me. I feel
like I could do anything now. If I am ever feeling down about
something, I will make sure to come talk to you. I am sure having
the pleasure of speaking with you will give me the motivation to do
anything.

Kanbarus smile never disappeared.

Her smile almost made her seem defenseless, but the strong core I
could feel behind it showed that was not so. That smile originated
from the absolute confidence she had in herself.

She was from a completely different world than me.

She was a completely different type of person from me.

That alone was immediately evident. Even without getting into

personality, a sports star like Kanbaru was from a different world
than Araragi Koyomi. I was well aware that she was a different type
of person from me, but one question remained. Why had Kanbaru
Suruga called out to me?

And she had done more than that.

She had repeatedly called out to me.

Why had she continued to call out to me?

I was fairly certain that it was not what Kanbaru had said. There
was no way she was speaking to me because she was feeling down
about something and needed motivation. I did not have that kind of
supernatural power. If I did, I would have been using it on myself.
I proceeded to ask Kanbaru the same question I had asked her
countless times over the past 3 days.

Kanbaru, what do you want today?

Oh, right...

While she had responded so promptly and without delay before,

Kanbaru now hesitated. But after an instant, the smile was back on
her face and she spoke.

Did you read the international section of the newspaper this

morning? I want to hear your opinion on the future political
situation in Russia.

Youre going with current events for the topic!?

And her choice of current events was horrible.

My knowledge of Japanese politics wasnt that great and she was

asking me to cross the ocean to Russia.

Oh, would you prefer to talk about India, Araragi-san?

Unfortunately, I am a very sports-minded and outdoorsy person, so
my knowledge of the IT field is relatively limited. The issues Russia
is dealing with now seem much more realistic to me.

...I didnt read the newspaper this morning.

I used an excuse I doubted could fool anyone. I actually had read it,
but not closely enough to have a proper discussion on it.

I see, said Kanbaru in response with a gentle narrowing of the

eyes. I suppose it isnt too surprising that someone as busy as you
would not have time to read the newspaper in the morning. And
yet I said something as insensitive as that. I apologize. Im thinking
we can put this discussion off until tomorrow. Is that okay with
you, Araragi-senpai?

Sure...

Youre so big-hearted. I didnt think you would forgive me so

readily. You surely must have thought I was a horrible person to
say something so shallow and yet you responded so generously
without giving voice to those thoughts. I guess this is what they call
having a broad mind and a large heart. I just grew to like you even
more than I did before, Araragi-senpai.

I see. Thanks...

Please, I dont need any thanks for that. I was just speaking my
honest feelings.

......

Another thing about her was that she was actually pretty smart.

It really did not seem fair that some people were both good at sports
and smart. Not that Hanekawa or Senjougahara were particularly
un-athletic, but they were nothing compared to that underclassman.
Senjougahara had been the ace of the track team in middle school,
but the giant blank during her high school years had surely had an
effect. Especially if you considered what she had experienced due to
her special circumstances.

Anyway, I obviously did not think Kanbaru truly wanted to have a

debate over the political situation in Russia. That was clearly just a
means to an end.
I had tried to ask her what she wanted countless times, but she had
never given me a proper answer.

She had to have some other reason.

The problem was that I could not even guess what that could be.

Why had she so suddenly started to follow me around like this?

What common point was there between Kanbaru, the star of the
school, and me, a third year falling behind in his studies?

I could think of nothing.

By the way, Araragi-senpai, has anything strange happened

today?

Ahn? Not really. Its been a normal day.

Except for you.

No, Ive actually gotten used to you by this point.

I just feel like Im about to get a headache with this exam coming
up.

The exam, hm? Exams give me a headache, too. Theyre especially

bad for people who have team or club activities. For a week
beforehand, the school bans any practices, so independent training
is our only option.

I see.
I had a hard time understanding why you would start independent
training during the time when youre actually given a break, but I
was not a part of the world of sports.

But for you personally, its actually a good thing, right? Your
sprained left hand can heal in that time.

Hm? Oh...Yes. Thats right. Kanbarus gaze dropped to her left

hand. There you go again, Araragi-senpai. You see the world in a
different way. Its like you are always thinking about how to make
other people happy. Such wonderful positive thinking.

My positive thinking would be nothing compared to yours even if

I worked at improving it for 100 years.

How exactly would you have to raise a child for her to grow up like
that?

She was so very strange.

Well, it may be trite, but studying is the primary role of a student.

Even if its a pain, we still need to work hard on our exams.

Its a good thing you didnt hurt your right hand.

No, Im actually a southpaw, said Kanbaru. In most everyday

situations, being left-handed is inconvenient, but in the world of
sports, it often gives you an advantage. Thanks to that, it is a
priceless attribute.

Is that so?

Yes. That holds true for almost every sport in which people are put
in direct competition. In modern Japan, most natural born left-
handed people have that corrected as they grow up, so only about 1
in 10 athletes are southpaws. Araragi-senpai, what effect do you
think those odds have on the game of basketball? Basketball is
played 5 on 5, so only one person on the court is likely to be a
southpaw. In this case, that one is me. That is one of the reasons that
I became an ace.

I see...

I sort of understood but did not at the same time.

Even if it was due to my own carelessness, once something like

this happens, the purely inconvenient side of it gets a whole lot
worse.

Left-handed, hm? Well, I dont play any sports so I dont know too
much about that, but just the idea of being left-handed seems pretty
cool to me.

I gave my honest impression.

I may have just been a bit biased, but left-handed peoples actions
always seemed smarter than those of normal people.

So I take it youre left-handed too, Araragi-senpai. Ha ha. I could

tell immediately because you have your watch on your right arm.
Left-handed people are good at spotting other lefties.

......

It was only a coincidence that I had my watch on my right wrist, but

I couldnt bear to tell her. From that moment on, I decided I had to
write and hold chopsticks in my left hand whenever I was around
her. I may have thought their actions seemed smarter, but I had no
intention of correcting my own behavior until I was one myself.

Isnt your exam going to be tough? You cant take the Japanese
portion with your dominant hand like that, can you?

With this kind of exam we dont have to write an essay for any of
the subjects and my handwriting being a bit messier than usual
wont be too much of an issue. Im sure the teachers have taken it all
into consideration. I apologize for bringing up something that made
you worry needlessly, Araragi-senpai. You really do care for your
underclassmen, dont you? If you have time to spare to worry about
me, you must be quite prepared for this exam.

No, Im not actually all that prepared.

I really wasnt.

I was not worrying about my underclassman because I was

prepared. In fact, I was anything but prepared at that moment.

Im actually about to head out to a study group.

A study group?

Kanbaru seemed puzzled.

Apparently the term study group was not enough of an explanation

for her.

Ysee...Well, to put it simply, my grades so far have been pretty

bad and my attendance was miserable in the first and second
year...
Why do I have to explain this?

And to an underclassman no less...even if she is a star.

So this exam is my only real chance to restore my standing.

In the end, I used a more pretentious wording.

It was an excellent example of how pathetic I was.

Hm, I see, nodded Kanbaru. Im the type that does not get very
worked up over studying for exams, so I dont really understand.
But, well, I think my classmates do sometimes gather at someones
house before an exam.

Yes. Its something like that.

I see. So youre about to head to over to a friends house. But...

Kanbaru hesitated for an instant. Studying isnt like sports.
Gathering everyones abilities together isnt necessarily going to
help...

Dont worry. While I called it a study group, its just me and the
other person and itll really just be me getting help with my
studying. I guess you could say Im getting tutored. Im getting help
from a classmate with really, really good grades.

Hmm...Oh, said Kanbaru as if she had just realized something.

So its Senjougahara-senpai.

...Hm? You know her?

You said it was someone in your class with good grades, so who
else could it be? Ive heard rumors about her.
Hmm. Well, yes. Its her.

I guess shes pretty well known, too.

It isnt that odd that an underclassman would know about Senjougahara.

Hm?

But wouldnt the person in our class most well known for good grades be
Hanekawa? She hasnt given up the top position of our year to anyone.
And even if you did think of Senjougahara first, you wouldnt say who
else could it be. Also, the term study group is usually used to refer to
groups of the same sex, so wouldnt you first think of a guys name rather
than a girls?

Why did she immediately think of Senjougahara?

Well, I shouldnt be keeping you then. Ill get going for today.

Sure.

Kanbaru Suruga made sure to add the for today while

announcing her intention to leave.

She lowered her hips and stretched out her legs.

She was warming up.

After making sure to properly stretch out her Achilles tendon...

Good luck, Araragi-senpai.

In an instant, Kanbaru disappeared the way she had come, leaving

behind only the sound of her footsteps. She was not merely a good
runner or quick on her feet; she reached her top speed unnaturally
quickly. If you timed her 100 or 200 meter speed, you probably
would not get some outstanding record, but she would likely do
rather well against a regular of the track team over a very short
distance like 10 or 20 meters. Kanbaru Suruga very much seemed
specialized for the sport of basketball where one had to move back
and forth along a limited court. Before long, she had completely
disappeared from view. Her quick motions had sent her short skirt
flipping up again and again, but she was wearing long spats that
were normally visible extending below her skirt, so it wasnt worth
focusing on.

She should really wear a track suit when she runs. That way, she wouldnt
get peoples hopes up in vain.

At any rate, I felt like a great weight had been placed on my

shoulders.

It had ended relatively quickly today, but I still had no idea why she
was following me around. That did not leave me in a very cheerful
mood because it meant the situation could possibly continue
indefinitely. That said, it was not like any real harm was being done
and I felt I could simply ignore it, but dealing with someone like her
was exhausting for someone like me. In fact, I doubted anyone
could speak with Kanbaru Suruga without being worn out. The
only possible person I could think of was...

Well...

It was Senjougahara.

Rararagi-san.
That certainly seemed closer to correct than last time, Hachikuji,
but dont sing my name like were in a musical. My name is
Araragi.

Sorry. I bit my tongue.

No, that was on purpose.

I bitw my tonwgue.

It wasnt on purpose!?

I caught a glimpse[17].

Of my true talent!?

At some point, Hachikuji had reappeared next to me.

She must have returned after seeing Kanbaru leave. With Hachikuji,
I could not be sure, but it was possible she had returned so quickly
because she felt a bit guilty about running off and leaving me alone.
In that case, she must have actually intentionally mistaken my name
this time to cover up her embarrassment.

Who was that?

You couldnt tell?

Hmm, deducing from the fact that she called you Araragi-senpai,
I suppose she must have been your underclassman.

...An excellent deduction.

Kanbaru would likely have compared Hachikuji to Marlowe or

some other old detective and praised her like crazy, but I could not.
I considered doing so for an instant, but something inside me would
not allow it.

I was only listening in, but it seemed like her conversation had no
real main point. Even at the end, I could not grasp what the
conversational theme was. Did she run after you only to chat?

Thats the thing, Hachikuji. I really dont know.

You dont know? That opinion paints quite the watercolor

painting.

Are my opinions in the art club?

She must have meant it lacked vividness.

I decided to be honest with Hachikuji.

Shes actually stalking me.

Stalking? You mean the thing girls wear on their lower body?

That would be a stocking.

Oh.

Does the word stalking not work for you? What I mean is, shes a
stalker.

Stalker? You mean the thing girls wear on their lower body?

Are you referring to a skirt? Why do you think I am so fascinated

with the things girls wear on their lower body?
While we were at it, I tried to think of a term Hachikuji could
mistake for spats, but my vocabulary was too poor to come up
with anything. I gave up and moved the conversation along.

I dont know why, but shes been blatantly following me around

for the past 3 days. It seems every time I turn around, shes calling
out to me. And its always her doing it. I have never once called out
to her. And every time, its exactly as you said. The conversations
have no main point. She always just chats with me and I honestly
cant tell what she wants.

She must have had some reason.

But I could find no clue as to what that might be.

She was likely keeping it hidden from me.

The only place used by both third years and second years was the
outdoor sports area, so we would almost never run across each
other by chance. That meant Kanbaru had to be going out of her
way to search me out during our short breaks between classes. I
knew that much, but that was all I knew.

Hmm. But isnt there an obvious answer to this? Isnt it possible

that she simply has a crush on you, Araragi-san?

Hah?

If I recall, she mentioned something about liking you.

Come to think of it, she did. But I seriously doubt it. It was a figure
of speech; she didnt mean it like that. Im not the protagonist of a
galge, so Im not going to just suddenly be popular one day.
Thats true. If you were a galge protagonist, that would make me
one of the target girls and that simply is not happening.

......

Does this elementary school girl know what a galge is?

Not that Ive ever actually played one.

But if I was, I would definitely be one of the hardest characters.

No, I think youd actually be pretty easy...

If you could get past her shyness, everything else would fall into
place little by little. If there were six heroines, she seemed like the
type that would be completed 4th.

Well, given the issue of her age, she might indeed be one of the
hardest ones.

Kanbaru isnt that kind of-...Wait, there was a rumor about her
having intense romances. But there are almost literally zero things
in common between us. Unlike them...Unlike Kanbaru and the like,
Im a complete nobody.

Come to think of it, she already knew my name and what class Im in when
she first called out to me.

Why did she know that?

Did someone tell her?

Did she see you take in an abandoned cat?

Ive never taken one in.

In fact, I had never even seen one.

Also, what kind of cat would just sit there in a cardboard box saying
please take me in?

How long would you have to train it to do that?

Then did she see you pick up some litter?

You just treated cats and litter as if theyre the same, didnt you?

Now that was a figure of speech. Please dont intentionally

misrepresent my words. You truly are a sick person to enjoy putting
words in the mouth of a helpless little girl.

You should apologize to cats. They can be pretty scary.

That wasnt my point, Araragi-san. Apparently love at first sight

really does exist. And apparently relationships between people are
decided based on their first impression of each other. Couldnt that
explain why this girl is following you around?

Hachikuji seemed to be enjoying herself and she could not stop

laughing.

In that way, she really was an elementary schooler.

That has to be it. The girl in me is telling me that is definitely it.

What will you do, Araragi-san? It seems she is currently only
testing things out, but she could confess her love to you in the near
future. What will you do? What will you do?

Listen up. Im not too fond of how some people insist on

explaining everything away with romantic feelings. Yknow, that
power of love you see in old foreign movies. If everything could be
solved that way, life would be so much easier. It cant be that. I find
it much more likely that she simply has some secondary reason.
Also, I said. I have already unlocked the route of the most
difficult character of all.

003

I have the feeling something unpleasant was said about me, said
Senjougahara Hitagi suddenly.

It truly had been sudden and without context, so my pencil stopped

moving across the notebook I was writing in.

However, it seemed she had been speaking to herself because

Senjougahara then changed the subject.

At any rate, teaching someone how to study is rather difficult, she

said.

In the end, Hachikuji had walked with me all the way back to my
house while we talked about Kanbaru and other things. That was
where we had parted ways. Hachikuji was always wandering
around somewhere, so I was sure I would run across her again
sooner or later. I put my backpack down, changed clothes, filled a
travel bag with textbooks, notebooks, and reference books, switched
over to my mountain bike, and headed for Senjougaharas place. My
sisters had already returned home, so I had expected to get
thoroughly grilled on where I was going, but I lucked out and
managed to escape unnoticed.
As I had mentioned to Hachikuji, Senjougaharas place was a good
ways away. I normally would not bike that great a distance, but
taking the bus would end up increasing the amount I would have to
walk, so I decided biking would be fastest. I had to make a
judgment call because, even though it was my second time heading
to her house, it was the first time heading there straight from my
house.

The Tamikura Apartments, a two story wooden apartment building.

Room 201.

A small room and a small sink.

Two high school students of a standard build sat facing each other
with a tea table between them and tools for studying spread out to
the left and right. That was all it took to fill up the room. The
Senjougahara family was just a father and daughter, Senjougahara
was an only child, and her father would work late into the night, so
we were of course alone.

Araragi Koyomi was alone with Senjougahara Hitagi.

Two healthy teenagers were alone in a small room.

A boy and a girl.

And they were officially dating.

They were boyfriend and girlfriend.

And yet...

...Why am I studying?
Eh? Because you are an idiot, right?

You dont have to put it like that!

She was right, of course.

But I still wished something would happen.

We had started dating on that May 14th Mothers Day on which I

had met Hachikuji Mayoi, but nothing even slightly sexual had
happened in the 2 weeks since.

......

Wait, have we even gone on a date?

Come to think of it, we havent.

We met in the morning at school, we talked between classes, we ate

lunch together, and we walked together after school until we had to
part ways to head to our respective houses. Those with some
knowledge of the world would probably think that sounded more
like what friends did, not lovers.

It wasnt that I greatly desired some kind of sexual situation to

occur, but I still felt we could act a little more like lovers.

I have never once had to work hard at the activities known as

studying, so I have no idea what has you so troubled or what you
are having difficulties with, Araragi-kun. I do not understand what
you do not understand.

I see...
She had a way of saying things that depressed me.

I had to wonder just how much of a gap there was between our
academic abilities. It certainly felt like a canyon of unfathomable
depth.

One theory I had is that you are only pretending to not understand
in order to receive special treatment.

That would be sacrificing a lot in an appeal for attention... But,

Senjougahara, you werent this smart from the moment you were
born, right? Surely you must have put a lot of hard work into
keeping your grades so high in the class.

Do you think the people putting so much effort into this are aware
of it?

...Is that so?

Oh, but make no mistake. I do feel sorry for people like you who
do not merely receive nothing from their hard work but do not even
know how to carry out that hard work.

Dont feel sorry for me!

I despair for you.

Ghh! Is there some rule saying you have to change it to something

worse if I comment on it!? Now I cant even beg for mercy
carelessly!

What kind of game is this?

While there is no specific plant known as a weed, there is a specific
animal known as a vermin.

No, there is not!

While there is no specific plant known as a weed, there are specific

people known as vermin.

If theyre known as that, someone has to be calling them that!

If I succeed in having you pass this exam, Araragi-kun, I feel that I

will have taken a step forward as a human being. When I think
about it that way, I can work up some motivation.

Dont think of my grades as a test of yourself. Also, I think the area

in which you need to take a step forward as a human being lies
elsewhere.

Quiet. I strangled you to death.

In the past tense!? Am I already dead!?

It may have been a mistake asking her to help me study. It may

have been better to just ask Hanekawa.

However...

As Hachikuji had pointed out, something could indeed happen if I

was alone with Senjougahara and I could not deny that my decision
had involved an embarrassing bit of an ulterior motive to that end.

I glanced up from my notebook and at Senjougahara.

Her expression was as composed as ever.

It rarely ever changed.

Even now that we were dating, she did not show me any kind of
special expression that she let no one else see. In that way, she really
may not have been a tsundere.

Her attitude had not changed at all, either.

Hmm...

Its possible I was merely expecting too much as usual. I had some
vague idea that becoming boyfriend and girlfriend would lead to
having some sort of special conversations, but it turned out that
change in relationship did not really give you anything more to talk
about than before. The sweet conversations of lovers may have been
nothing more than a foolish delusion.

......

With everything Senjougahara had experienced and the situation

she had been in, another problem was her sense of chastity and
virtue. Not only that, but she was likely satisfied with the current
state of the relationship.

She had said she did not want an assumed relationship.

Since she had said it, it must have been true.

But...

Even so...

I doubted Senjougahara herself felt nothing about the situation we

were in. Also, my previous visit to the Tamikura Apartments had
ended up being much more sexual than this one. Surely she was not
so ignorant of the world to not think anything of inviting her
boyfriend over while her dad was out of the house. When I thought
about it that way, the clothes Senjougahara wore as she sat across
the tea table from me did somehow look like she had put effort into
choosing them. However, her skirt was oddly long for that. She was
not wearing stockings so her legs were bare, but the long skirt kept
most of those bare legs from view. It seemed she was cautious about
the situation more than anything.

Sigh...

As the guy, am I supposed to be more assertive in my advances? But Ive

never gone out with a girl before, so I dont know how to do that.

Whats wrong, Araragi-kun? Youve stopped writing.

Nothing. I was just musing over how high the difficulty level is.

Of a problem like that? We might be in trouble.

Senjougahara merely looked dumbfounded and showed no sign of

trying to understand what I was feeling. Hers were the eyes of
someone used to looking down on others.

I guess thats enough, she said dejectedly.

Eh? Wait a second. Why are you setting your mechanical pencil
aside and sitting there so sluggishly? Senjougahara, dont tell me
giving up on me is one of the options you see for yourself!

It is there, she said resolutely. It is at 6:4...no, maybe 7:3.

Regardless which side is 7 and which side is 3, thats quite a
realistic ratio...

I would have felt better had she said 9:1.

Really, though. Which side is the 7?

I am rather conflicted. Not trying at all would preserve my pride

better than if I tried and failed.

Please dont abandon me.

It was looking like going to Hanekawa for help was my only option.

But for some reason or another, I did not want to do that.

I simply could not stand being taught by that class rep that
fearlessly viewed academics as something anyone could do if they
tried.

If you insist, I suppose I will not abandon you.

That would be a huge help.

Think nothing of it. I bar no one from coming to me and allow no

one to escape.

Thats a frightening way of thinking!

Dont worry. If we are going to do this, I will make sure to work

you to death.

You dont need to work me to death! Just giving it my all should

be enough! How much are you planning to force me to do!?
But, Araragi-kun, you can do math, cant you?

Eh? Well, yes.

How does she know that?

Before I could speak my question, Senjougahara said, I heard that

from Hanekawa-san.

True enough, Hanekawa would know my grades better than

anyone.

Wait. Hanekawa doesnt seem like the type to tell people about
others grades.

Oh, did my wording give the wrong impression? I meant that,

while secretly listening in the other day, I heard you and
Hanekawa-san discussing that.

...Youre right. I did get the wrong impression.

Instead of hearsay, it was eavesdropping.

Is that so? said Senjougahara as if she truly did not care.

She was quite the troublesome girl.

I can manage math because it doesnt require memorization. The

formulas and equations are also great. Theyre like your special
attacks, yknow? Like the Specium Ray or the Kamehameha or
something. I wish all the other subjects had special attacks like
that.
If such things existed, no one would have any trouble. However, if
we ignore the methods of studying for individual subjects and think
only of how to study for an exam itself, there are certain surefire
methods even if there are no special attacks. Senjougahara picked
up the mechanical pencil she had set down next to her. The one I
am about it bring up is a bit of a gamble and its possible payoff may
sound tempting, but it must not become a habit. For that reason, I
hesitate to recommend it, but we need a makeshift method and it
seems to be our only remaining option. Essentially, we just have to
ensure that you do not fail, Araragi-kun, so let us make the border
be half the average...

She quickly wrote two numbers in her notebook.

One was the expected average and the other was half that.

When it was put like that, it certainly seemed like an achievable

score, but you had to think of it like a perfect score.

In the subjects that rely more on memorization, the teachers have a

few problems that they absolutely must put on the exam. It is
important to aim for those. Rather than taking broad aim over
everything, you need to focus your efforts over a smaller area. You
do not want to end up fussing over problems you cannot solve to
the point of overlooking problems you can solve. Araragi-kun, do
you understand what I am saying?

...Yeah, I guess.

Smart people definitely had a completely different way of thinking

about exams. I had never once thought about what the teachers
would be thinking as they made the exam. Well, I might have in
middle school when I was still getting good grades, but that was so
long ago I wasnt quite sure.
I did not miss my middle school years.

Okay, let us begin with an easy subject like world history.

World history is easy...?

It is. You just have to memorize all of the important terms.

......

As I said, I am not expecting that much from you this time,

Araragi-kun. If you let me help you prepare, you should be able to
pass this exam, so what do you think about your future?

My future?

What will you do after high school? said Senjougahara as she

pointed her mechanical pencil toward me.

I dont know. Thats kind of a sudden question.

You are a third year high school student at the end of May. Surely
you have thought of something. Before, you said you would be
satisfied as long as you graduated. Does that mean you intend to
start working when you graduate? Do you have a specific plan? Do
you have connections at a place of employment?

Umm...

Or do you intend to start off as a freeter? Or maybe a NEET? I do

not like those terms because they seem to oversimplify the problem,
but I of course wish to give priority to your intentions and views,
Araragi-kun. Oh, I suppose there is also the option of going to a
technical school.
Are you my mother...?

She was obsessing over a bunch of trivial things.

There was no way I could give an answer while she showered me

with so many questions. And she had to know that my hands were
already more than full with the upcoming exam.

Your mother? Dont be ridiculous. I am your girlfriend.

......

That blunt manner of speech.

In a way, it was more of a special attack than her verbal abuse.

At least it was when used on me.

I suppose youre right. I do need to decide on my plans before

long. By the way, what are you going to do, Senjougahara?

I can probably get a recommendation.

...Is that so?

Was the term probably too modest?

For you it was.

Anyway, I will be going on to college.

College, hm?

She said it like it was obvious.

But then, it probably was for her.

I would likely never know, but I had to wonder what it felt like to
be smart.

Due to tuition issues, the paths open to me are limited. It would be

a bit self-insulting to say luckily, but the fact remains that there is
nothing specific I wish to do, so I can match where I go to what
works.

Im sure you wont change no matter where you go.

True, said Senjougahara. But if possible, I would like to head

down the same path as you, Araragi-kun.

Yeah, but that...

I was of course glad to hear that, but it was more or less physically
impossible.

Yes, agreed Senjougahara. Ignorance may be a crime, but being

stupid is not. Instead, being stupid is a punishment. If you had been
as virtuous as me in your past life, this would not be happening to
you, Araragi-kun. I feel sorry for you. I am vividly feeling just how
the ant must have felt as it watched the grasshopper freezing in the
cold of winter. You are quite something to make me feel like an
insect.

......

Have patience.

Objecting now will only open the wound further.

Things would be so much easier if you would only die. The
grasshoppers corpse would provide the ant with so much valuable
nutrition.

The next time I see you will be in court!

My patience did not hold out.

I was not a very patient person.

But, Senjougahara, even if we do different things after graduation,

we wont necessarily be walking down separate paths, right?

Yes, thats true. But what if I have a change of heart while living
my college days of group dating?

What, youre planning to really live up the campus life!?

What will we do? Will we live together after graduating? she said
suddenly. If we did that, our time together would actually increase
even if we were doing separate things.

Thats...not too bad, I guess.

Its not too bad? What does that mean?

...I want to. Please let me.

Oh, I see, she said and naturally lowered her eyes to the textbook.

She had said it as if it were nothing and with such timing that it
could have been taken as a joke, but even someone as unperceptive
as me had figured out that she was not the type to joke at a time like
that.
That was who Senjougahara Hitagi was.

She had really planned everything out.

Or perhaps it would be best to take it as her having seriously

thought about me. Normally, a high school couple did not give that
much thought to the future of their relationship.

What does it actually mean to be going out?

Its just a verbal promise. Theres no guarantee.

I sighed.

I had never gone out with a girl before. Not only did I not know
how to take the initiative, but I had no idea how I was supposed to
react to that situation.

In fact, I couldnt even take a guess.

If only I had played some galges.

That would have at least given me something to reference.

But unlike in a game, the routes had no end in real life.

You sure are sighing a lot, Araragi-kun. Did you know that every
time you sigh, you are letting a piece of happiness escape?

Then I must have already let thousands of pieces of happiness

escape...

I have no interest in how much happiness you have let escape, but
I would rather you did not sigh in front of me. It makes me sick.
You say some horrible things.

And by sick, I mean lovesick.

...Hm, now thats a difficult one to respond to.

She seemed slightly happy.

She must have set that up as a trap.

By the way, Araragi-kun, said Senjougahara. Did you know that

I have never broken up with a guy?

......

Now that was an example of how to soften what you were saying.

At first glance, it sounded like she was a very popular girl, but she
was actually announcing that she had zero experience with guys.

So, she continued. I have no intention of breaking up with you.

Her composed expression did not change. Not a single eyebrow

moved. It made you think she had no feelings whatsoever.
However, she had to have felt something about it.

It had lasted 2 years.

Ever since that time between middle school and high school that
was not quite spring break during which she had been neither a
middle schooler nor a high schooler, Senjougahara Hitagi had been
unable to make any contact with other people. It wasnt surprising
if she had forgotten how to make contact with others in that time. If
she had become more negative than most and more reserved than
necessary, that was to be expected. It was like dealing with an
extremely cautious stray cat. Well, if anyone was a cat, it was
Hanekawa.

Neither of us knew how to take the initiative.

...Hey, Senjougahara.

What?

Do you still carry that stapler and other stuff with you?

Come to think of it, I havent of late.

I see.

How careless of me.

Careless, you say?

But that was still a step in the right direction.

You couldnt exactly call her a tsundere for such a small change, but
if that was her personality...

Hm?

Speaking of Senjougahara from two years ago...

You were the ace of the track team in middle school, right?

Yes.

Are you going to go back to that?

No. I have no reason to, she responded quick enough to be called
instantaneous. I have no intention to returning to what I was back
then.

Hmm...

From what I had heard, in middle school Senjougahara had been

the ace of the track team as well as sociable, kind to everyone, hard
working, and not at all pretentious. She had been an active student
that had given everything her all. None of that was anything more
than rumors, but as rumors go, they were fairly reliable.

Just before high school, that had changed.

That change had lasted for two years.

And then what had changed was returned to normal.

Even if she herself had no intention of going back to how things

were, the change had been corrected.

I see no need or necessity to return and, more importantly,

returning now would do no good. I have gained much more I must
bear. Not to mention that we are already in our third year. Why do
you ask, Araragi-kun?

Oh, I was just curious what you were like back when you played
sports. ...Well, with such a long time of not playing, it really
probably isnt worth going back.

Just as the term cat made me think of Hanekawa Tsubasa, the

term sports made me think of Kanbaru Suruga, so that
underclassmen had appeared in my minds eye as I asked.
She really was trying to stay positive, but could she truly be called
positive if she refused to face her past?

Senjougahara was actually...

Dont worry. Even if I do not play sports, I intend to maintain this

figure.

...That wasnt why I asked.

But, Araragi-kun, you were drawn to me by this highly elastic and

selfish body that has never broken up with a guy, werent you?

Dont make it sound like Im just after your body!

Also...selfish body?

Surely you can come up with a better way to put that.

I see. So you are not after my body, said Senjougahara as if she

were playing dumb. Then you can wait a while for that part, cant
you?

Is that what she wanted to say?

If so, she had taken a horribly roundabout and indirect way of

saying it. That was quite like her.

A sense of chastity.

I doubted that was all there was to it, but...

Oh, right. Araragi-kun, you are not the kind of shameless person
that says narrow-minded things like I ate my moneys worth or it
would be a waste if I did not eat more while at a buffet despite the
fact that you pay the same amount no matter how much you order,
are you?

......

I had no idea what kind of implication she was trying to get across,
but I knew her intent had to be to put some kind of restraint on me.

She was reserved in her relationships.

However, she took her relationship with me very seriously.

In that case, I was willing to go along with it.

I still had no idea what it meant to be going out, but once you were,
you had to stick with them on everything.

...Oh, right.

I suddenly had a thought. I decided to ask Senjougahara about

Kanbaru Suruga. The reason I had not yet mentioned that issue to
her was not that I did not want to worry Senjougahara. Instead, it
had been because I did not consider it worth mentioning and did
not want to annoy her. However, in the off chance that Kanbaru
Surugas driving force was exactly as that elementary school girl
had interpreted it, I felt it would be unfair not to tell my (supposed)
girlfriend.

Kanbaru had just appeared in my minds eye and there was one
other thing that bothered me about it.

Hey, Senjoughara.

What?
Do you know Kanbaru Suruga?

......

In response, I only received silence.

Or rather, I received nothing.

Speaking of unfair, the way I had asked that had been quite unfair.
After all, Kanbaru Suruga was a star known throughout the school,
so everyone would know who she was. I was unsure if it had
happened yet, but rumors of Kanbaru stalking me would be
circulating the school by the start of the next week at the very latest.
That was not really a problem because I could just treat them as
false. At any rate, that was why my question naturally held a
different meaning. Instead of giving clarification, I endured the
silence.

Hmm, said Senjougahara. Kanbaru Suruga. Now that name

takes me back.

...I see.

As I had thought, they were old friends.

That was why Kanbaru had first thought of Senjougahara rather

than the top of the year Hanekawa when I mentioned the study
group. Not to mention the slight nuances of meaning I could
occasionally glimpse in Kanbarus words. The reason I had never
thought of the possibility Hachikuji had mentioned was that the
hints of a different possibility had been rather blatant. Namely, the
possibility that Kanbaru was after someone other than me.
Is that why you asked about when I was in middle school? She
was my underclassman back then.

She still is. You go to the same school. Oh, wait. Do you mean that
Kanbaru was on the track team in middle school?

No, she has been in the basketball team ever since middle school.
...Kanbaru? That certainly is a familiar way of referring to her.

In an instant, the look in Senjougaharas eyes turned to something

threatening. Those eyes that normally held no emotion suddenly
emitted a dangerous light. Before I could give any words of
explanation, the top of the mechanical pencil in her right hand
moved accurately toward my left eye with tremendous speed.
Immediately, I reflexively tried to avoid it, but at the same time as
she had moved her right hand, she had brought one knee up onto
the tea table, scattering the notebooks spread out atop it in the
process, and grabbed the back of my head with her left hand to
prevent me from moving.

The end of the mechanical pencil stopped not just barely away from
my eyeball, but so ridiculously close that I could not even blink. She
pulled it off so well that the hand on the back of my head seemed as
much to ensure the steadiness of her own hand as to ensure I did
not make any unnecessary movements.

...S-Senjougahara Hitagi.

Even without the stapler, you havent changed at all!

What about that girl, Araragi-kun?

......!
Wait, wait!

Since when did she get this jealous!?

This level of jealousy just sounds like a joke! Also, I didnt refer to her that
familiarly, did I? Whats wrong with referring to an underclassman with
no honorific? If merely getting to know another girl without her knowledge
gets this kind of treatment, what would she do to me if I actually cheated
on her?

While what I was currently experiencing was bad, it was at least a

relief to learn about it early like that. I was truly glad that I learned
of that aspect of Senjougahara while I actually had a legitimate
excuse.

Araragi-kun, your wounds heal very quickly, do they not? So what

happens if an entire eyeball is destroyed?

Stop, stop! An eyeball would be very bad! Ive done nothing

wrong, I dont feel familiar with her at all, and theres no one for me
but you!

Is that so? That is a relief.

She gently pulled back the mechanical pencil. After spinning it

twice in her hand, she placed it on the tea table and put the
notebooks and textbooks back in order. I watched her while trying
to control my racing heart.

I may have gotten a bit carried away. Did I frighten you, Araragi-
kun?

...One day, youre definitely going to kill someone.

When that happens, I will make sure it is you. I want my first to be
you. I will choose no one but you. I promise.

Dont say something so scary like its a good thing! I may love you,
but Im not willing to let you kill me!

Being killed by one who loves you enough to kill you sounds like
the best possible death to me.

I dont want that kind of twisted love!

You dont? Too bad. Im shocked. I thought you of all people...

Would be fine with you killing me?

...Hm? Hm, yeah, I suppose.

What kind of vague response is that!?

Oh...yeah...I guess thats a bad thing.

Youre still being vague!?

Whats wrong with it? If I kill you, that means I will be the closest
person to you when you draw your last breath. Isnt it romantic?

No. Id rather be killed by anyone else. I have a feeling no matter

how someone else would kill me it would still be better than having
you kill me.

I cant have that. If anyone else kills you, Araragi-kun, I will kill
that murderer. I keep my promises.

......
Her love was already quite twisted.

It did give me a good sense of how much she loved me though...

Anyway, about Kanbaru.

With the much more dangerous topic over, Senjougahara naturally

returned to the previous subject.

We may have been on different teams, but as the aces of our

respective teams, we still spent a lot of time together despite being
in different years. Also...

Also?

Well, after all this time it is hardly worth mentioning, but even
outside of sports, I put her through a lot. Or rather, had her help me
out a lot. But, Araragi-kun, she said, turning her attention back
toward me. First, I would like to know why you brought her up
here. If you have done nothing wrong, then surely you can give a
proper explanation.

S-sure.

Of course, even if you have done something wrong, I will require a

proper explanation.

......

As she might have actually killed me had I tried to hide anything, I

told Senjougahara all about how Kanbaru Suruga had been stalking
me over the past three days. I told her I would hear those rhythmic
footsteps from behind, have an utterly pointless conversation, and
then Kanbaru would leave without showing any kind of purpose in
approaching me. I told her that Kanbaru surely had some kind of
objective, but that I had no idea what it could be.

As I gave my explanation, I had a thought.

Kanbaru must have purposefully approached me while

Senjougahara was not there. When I had been with Hachikuji was
an exception. Normally, she only approached when I was alone. In
other words, it was no coincidence that Senjougahara was unaware
of Kanbarus stalking.

And I had another thought.

Senjougahara had said I referred to Kanbaru familiarly, but the way

she had spoken about their time in middle school had seemed much
more so. It may have been nothing, though.

Just as she did not show any emotion on her face, Senjougahara
showed no emotion in her voice. Whatever she said, she said with a
steady, level voice. When I thought about how much pure will that
would take, a chill ran down my back.

I see, said Senjougahara after hearing my general explanation. As

usual, her expression did not change and her voice was flat.
Araragi-kun.

What?

What has a flood above and a fire below?

...?

Why the riddle all of a sudden?

I had no idea why Senjougahara had suddenly become a riddle-
telling character, but I answered anyway. Luckily, that was a riddle
I knew the answer to.

A bath heater, right?

No, incorrect, said Senjougahara in the same flat voice. The

answer is Kanbaru Surugas house.

What are you planning to do to the star of the schools house!?

You scare me!

I can see the anger in your eyes!

Well, enough joking around.

You shouldnt joke about that kind of thing. I could actually see
you doing something like that.

You could? Well, I will do as you say and make sure to only speak
my jokes.

That would be the normal way of doing it...

Kanbaru learned of my secret a year before you did, Araragi-kun,

said Senjougahara. She said it normally as if it really did not matter,
but at the same time sounded somehow gloomy. When I entered
the second year was when Kanbaru first entered Naoetsu High
School. Given the location of the school, I had expected some of the
new underclassmen to know me, and I had put together my own
means of dealing with that. However, I let my guard down a bit
with Kanbaru.
Hmm.

Senjougahara Hitagi.

Her secret.

I had learned of that secret when she had slipped on the stairs and I
had caught her. It had been a complete coincidence. But that also
meant that it was a secret that could be revealed due to a small
coincidence like that. Senjougahara had previously told me that I
was not the first to learn of her secret. Kanbaru must have been one
of those.

Given Kanbarus personality...

She...Kanbaru tried to help you, didnt she?

Yes, she did. I refused of course, said Senjougahara coolly. It was

as if she thought that was the obvious syntax, as if she thought that
was the proper way to speak Japanese. I used a similar method as
when I dealt with you, Araragi-kun. You stuck with me regardless,
but she never returned. I suppose that shows the limits of the
relationship we had.

...She didnt return.

That had happened a year before.

Senjougahara had likely very thoroughly refused her. As Kanbaru

knew of Senjougharas past self, of her time in middle school as the
ace of the track team, Senjougahara had certainly rejected her with a
severity that was similar and yet dissimilar to my case. Otherwise,
someone like Kanbaru would never have backed off so easily. On
May 8th, when I had learned of her secret, Senjougahara had said
that the only person in the school that currently knew of her secret
was Harukami-sensei from the school infirmary.

That currently knew.

In other words, Kanbaru Suruga had in the past learned of

Senjougaharas secret and become one of the poor victims...no,
sacrifices that were forcibly made to forget by Senjoughara. But had
Kanbaru really forgotten about Senjougahara?

...She was your friend, right?

In middle school, yes. No longer, though. We are complete

strangers.

But you arent in the same situation you were in a year ago. Your
secret has been-...

Didnt I tell you, Araragi-kun? she said, cutting me off. I have no

intention of returning to what I was back then.

......

This is the way of life I have chosen.

I see...

If that was the way of life she had chosen for herself, it was not my
place to interject...That was my opinion in theory. Also, I knew
Senjougahara was not selfish enough to say she wanted to make up
with the person she had so harshly rejected now that the issue had
been resolved.
Okay, I understand your relationship with Kanbaru now, but that
doesnt really explain why shes following me around.

She has likely learned that you and I are dating, Araragi-kun. We
started dating two weeks ago and she started stalking you three
days ago, so the timing fits perfectly.

What? So she wants to know what kind of guy your boyfriend is

and is investigating me?

More or less. What a troublesome girl. I have no real explanation,

but it seems it is my responsibility for not settling things with her
once and for all.

Settling things...?

I did not like the way she said that.

It was decidedly unsettling.

Do not worry. I will take responsibility and...

You dont have to! You dont have to! I have no idea what youll
do! I can take care of something like this on my own!

No need to hold back. Dont be so wishy-washy.

Id rather be wishy-washy than washing blood out of my

clothes...

Hmm...

One thing still doesnt add up.

You harshly rejected Kanbaru in her first year, right? And she
never returned, right? Why would she be so interested in your
boyfriend after all this time?

If this were a standard case of hearing an old friend had a

boyfriend, you would be right. However, this case is different,
Araragi-kun. You did what Kanbaru could not, so this is not all that
surprising. Kanbaru views what you did as what she had been
unable to do.

Oh...So thats it.

When she had learned of Senjougahara Hitagis secret, she had been
rejected. She had been harshly and mercilessly rejected. As I was
her boyfriend, it was only natural that Kanbaru would assume I too
knew of Senjougaharas secret. As she would see me as one who
was able to be with Senjougahara while knowing her secret, Kanbaru
would definitely be interested.

However, I doubted Kanbaru had realized that the secret itself had
been resolved. If she had, she would likely have contacted
Senjougahara directly rather than coming to me.

It may not be right for me to say so, but Kanbaru looked up to

me, said Senjougahara as she looked to the side. I realized I was
in that position and I played that character for her because I wanted
to, so it really could not be helped. That is how I view it anyway.
That is why I made sure to warn her against causing any trouble in
the future when I rejected her, but it seems she did not forget me
after all.

Dont make her sound like a nuisance. She isnt doing any of this
out of ill will. Not to mention that being forgotten by someone is
fairly depre-...
She is a nuisance, said Senjougahara decisively. She had not
hesitated at all. It has nothing to do with whether it is being done
out of ill will or not.

Dont say it like that. If Kanbaru looked up to you and if she is still
worried about you...well, it might be a bit weird to make up after
that, but its still a possibility, right?

No, it is not. It all happened a year ago, we were only friends in

middle school, and it would indeed be weird for us to make up.
Didnt I tell you I have no intention of returning to what I was back
then? Or are you suggesting I go to her and apologize for making
her wait for so long? Nothing could be more foolish.

To show that she was done with the subject, Senjougahara then
changed the subject as if it had suddenly entered her head. Her skill
in that area was as brilliant as always.

Oh, right. By the way, Araragi-kun, do you plan to see Oshino-san

anytime soon?

Oshino? Hm, I guess so...

While I had no reason to see Oshino, I did have to stop by that old
cram school before long to have Shinobu suck my blood. It was
Friday, so I decided to make some time over the weekend.

I see. Then...

Senjougahara silently stood up, grabbed an envelope from the

dresser, and returned. She held the envelope out toward me. It had
a postal mark on it.

Could you give this to Oshino-san?

What is-...Ohh.

I realized the answer before finishing my question.

Oshino Meme.

It was the fee for the job that Hawaiian-shirt-wearing man had
done.

Compensation had been required for removing the calamity that

had fallen upon Senjougahara and been her secret for so long.

If I recall, it was 100,000 yen.

I checked the contents and it indeed contained 10 ten thousand yen

bills. The ten crisp bills had likely been newly withdrawn from the
bank.

Hehh... You got this faster than I expected. Especially since you
said it was going to take some time given your situation. I thought
you werent working?

I did work, said Senjougahara nonchalantly. I helped out with

my dads work just a bit. More accurately, I made him let me help,
but this is the money I made there.

Hmm.

Senjougaharas father worked for a foreign investment company,

but that was probably still the simplest option. With her
personality, Senjougahara could not work a normal part-time job
very easily. Not to mention that our school prohibited them.
Personally, I feel it was cheating to get help from my father, so I
did not like doing this, but I wanted to pay him back as soon as I
could. I was raised in a family with lots of debt, if you recall. There
was a bit extra, so you can use that to buy yourself lunch at school,
Araragi-kun. Our schools food is both high quality and reasonably
priced, so you can order anything you want.

...Thanks.

School lunch, hm?

A weekday lunch at school.

She really has no intention of ever going out on a date, does she?

But wouldnt it be better if you went by and gave it to Oshino

yourself?

No. I do not like Oshino-san.

I see...

Is that really something to say about the man that saved you?

It was not that she felt no gratitude toward Oshino, and that really
showed her true worth.

Not that I was all that fond of Oshino either.

If possible, I would rather never see him again. I never again want
to deal with someone who can see right through people like him.

Yeah, the two of you arent all that compatible. His frivolous,
mocking manner just doesnt fit your personality.
As I spoke, I put the envelope next to the cushion I was sitting on. I
tapped the top of the envelope and nodded at Senjougahara.

I get it, I get it. I wont say anything more. Ill just take it for you.
Ill take responsibility and give it to Oshino when I next see him.

Thank you very much.

No problem.

I then had a thought.

Compatibility.

Manner.

Personality.

Kanbaru Suruga, that underclassman with the hard to explain

revolutionary new character, was perhaps something like the
opposite of Senjougaharas character. If you took her compatibility,
manner, personality, and everything else...

In middle school, Senjougahara had been the ace of the track team.

Not only that, people had looked up to her. Surely, Kanbaru had
not been the only one looking at her with respect in their eyes. She
had played the part of one in that position. She had played the part
that was the complete opposite of her current verbal abuse-spewing
self.

Verbal abuse and sweet words.

Insults and praise.

Opposites.

Two sides of the same coin.

In other words...

Okay, Araragi-kun, said Senjougahara with those emotionless

eyes. Let us continue studying. Do you know Thomas Edisons
famous words? Genius is one percent inspiration and ninety nine
percent perspiration. An excellent adage befitting of a genius. But I
am sure Edison felt that one percent was the most important part.
After all, they say the difference between the DNA of humans and
monkeys is about that much.

004

For Senjougahara, it was two years. For me, it was two weeks.

For Hanekawa, it was during Golden Week.

For Hachikujiwell, I dont know for sure about her.

If youre wondering what Im talking about, its the length of time

we spent in contact with a monster. The length of time we had a
strange experience. The length of time we had a horrible experience
that was most certainly not normal.

Take me, Araragi Koyomi, for example.

It embarrasses me enough to want to crawl into a hole and hide, but

I was attacked by an old type of vampire during this civilized
society of the 21st century. I felt blood-chilling fear and panic, and
the traditional and legendary vampire sucked out all the blood of
my body.

I was sucked dry.

And I became a vampire.

I feared the sun, I hated crosses, I avoided garlic, and I disliked holy
water. In exchange, I received physical strength tens, hundreds,
thousands, or even tens of thousands of times greater than a normal
human. And in exchange for that, I felt an absolute hunger for
human blood. I became one of those night walkers seen often in
manga, anime, and movies. I really felt such a realistic vampire was
unfair. The popular vampires these days walk around fine during
the day, wear crosses as accessories, eat gyoza, and drink holy
water. Only the physical abilities remain.

Even so, the need to suck human blood remains for vampires even
in modern popular culture.

A blood-sucking demon. A vampire.

In the end, I had been saved from that hell by a middle aged man
passing by. He was not a vampire hunter, he was not part of some
Christian special forces, and he was not a vampire that killed his
own kind. Oshino Meme was merely a flippant Hawaiian shirt-
wearing man who had been passing by. However, that did not
change the fact that those two weeks had in fact happened.

A demon.

A cat.

A crab.
A snail.

There was one thing different between myself and the other three
that I had to keep in mind. The difference was greatest when it came
to Senjougahara Hitagi.

This was not the difference in the length of time.

It was how much we had lost.

She had said she did not intend to go back to how she was.

But that was not absolutely necessary. Wasnt it just that

Senjougahara did not want to go back?

After all, Senjougahara had cut off any and all socializing with
others for two years. She had not made contact with anyone in the
class for those two years. Even now that those two years were over,
she had not changed.

Other than her dealings with me, nothing had changed.

Araragi Koyomi had merely become a special exception for

Senjougahara, but everything else had stayed the same.

No difference could be seen between before and after.

She merely no longer had to go to the school infirmary.

She merely could join in during PE.

She still quietly read in the corner of the classroom. It was as if

reading in the classroom was her way of constructing a solid wall
between her and her classmates.
She really had only started to talk with me.

She only ate lunch with me.

Her position in the classroom was still that of the quiet, sickly A-
student. The rest of the class only saw it as her mood and illness
improving slightly.

Hanekawa, the class rep, had innocently rejoiced and said it was a
wonderful improvement, but I could not view that scene and feeling
positively.

She had not lost all that.

She may have cast it aside herself.

But the result was the same.

I dont mean to sound like I knew what I was talking about. I had
no idea what our relationship would be like from then on, and I did
not think it was a problem I should interfere with.

I did not feel that interfering or meddling was the right thing to do.

Even so, I couldnt help but have a certain thought.

What if Senjougahara-?

She currently was not carrying around a stapler. That was a step
forward and a change, so couldnt she continue to head down that
path?

What if she opened up to others and not just me?

Hello?
Hello, sorry about the wait. This is Hanekawa.

While that was the proper way to answer a telephone, was it really
right to say that with a cell phone?

Hanekawa Tsubasa.

The class rep and a high end student.

She seemed to have been born to be a class rep.

I had originally joked about her being the class rep among class reps
chosen by god, but in the two months I had worked with her as the
vice class rep, I had learned that she matched that so well it was no
longer funny. It was greatly important for humans to acquire
knowledge, but that was one thing I wish I had not learned.

What is it? It is rather unusual for you to call me, Araragi-kun.

Oh, its nothing really. I just wanted to ask you something.

You want to ask me something? Thats fine. Oh, is it about what

our class is doing for the cultural festival? Really, it would be best
not to think too much about the cultural festival until the exam is
over. You have your hands full with that, right, Araragi-kun? I will
of course take care of all the minor tasks for the time being. Or are
you saying we should change what we are doing? We decided it by
survey, so that would be difficult. Oh, or is there some kind of
problem meaning we have to change it? If so, we need to deal with
that as quickly as possible.

Could you not get so off topic?

She really was the type to move the conversation off somewhere on
her own.

Not only did she jump to the wrong conclusions a lot, but she
talked a lot and quickly.

It was hard to get a word in edgewise.

It was 8 PM.

On the way back from Senjougaharas home in the Tamikura

Apartments, I was walking along an asphalt road while pushing my
bike rather than sitting in the seat. This was not because Hachikuji
was next to me or because Kanbaru was running toward me. I had
simply wanted to think.

In the end, we had studied until 8PM.

It was dinner time, so I had gotten my hopes up that Senjougahara

would cook some food for me, but she showed no sign of doing so. I
had finally run out of patience and had complained about my
empty stomach.

I see. Then we can end this here. I am sure you remember, but
there are very few streetlights in this area. Be careful on your way
home. See you later, alligator.

She had readily driven me out. As her father often worked late into
the night, Senjougahara Hitagi essentially lived alone, so she had to
have been able to cook.

Her difficulty level just kept getting higher and higher.

But then, I did not get hungry much, so my complaint of hunger
had been mostly a lie.

I said I had been thinking, but I was the person Senjoughara had
given up on trying to teach to the level of getting an average grade.
For me, thinking did not produce all that much. It was mostly just
for my own satisfaction. However, there were some things it was
okay to have end at the level of self-satisfaction and some things
that were not. This was the latter.

And so I called Hanekawas cell phone while walking along and

pushing my bike with my right hand. It was half past eight at night,
so I was unsure whether that was an appropriate time to call a girl I
did not have all that close a relationship with. However, from
Hanekawas reaction, it must have been in the acceptable range.
Hanekawa was the personification of diligence and was stricter
about morals than most, so she would have told me if I should not
have been doing what I was doing.

Um, this might end up being a long conversation. Do you have

time, Hanekawa?

Hm? Yes. I was just doing a bit of light studying.

She truly must have been the class rep among class reps chosen by
god to give that answer so readily and without sounding displeased
by it.

What qualifies as light studying?

Well, Ill try to keep it as short as possible. Hanekawa, you went to
the same middle school as Senjoughara, right? What was it? Oh,
right. Public Seifuu Middle School.

Yes, I did.

Then do you know Kanbaru Suruga who is one year below us?

Of course I do. In fact, is there anyone who does not know who she
is? Even you do, right, Araragi-kun? She is the captain of the
basketball team and seen as a star throughout the school. Even I
have gone to some of her games with friends to cheer her on.

Well, Im not really interested in the present. I want to know about

when Kanbaru was in middle school.

Hmm? You do? Why?

I just do.

Hmm. Well, she was not all that different in middle school from
now. She was the ace of the basketball team. From the latter half of
the second year on, she was the captain just like now. What about
it?

Oh, um

I could not tell her.

I could not say it.

She would not believe me.

Who would believe that the star of the school was all but stalking
me of all people?

There was also the issue of how much of the situation it was okay
for me to tell her. But, well, it was Hanekawa, so I decided I could
tell her a certain amount. Of course, I would be indirect about the
parts I should keep hidden.

Ive heard Kanbaru and Senjougahara got along well in middle

school. Is that true?

Hmm? I believe I told you this before, but even though I was in the
same middle school, I never actually had any physical contact with
Senjougahara-san. She was popular, so someone more plain like me
had just heard about her.

That modesty of yours always moves me, but could we do without

it for once?

The Valhalla Combo.

Hah?

I just remembered. They were called the Valhalla Combo.

Senjougahara-san of the track team and Kanbaru-san of the
basketball team were the Valhalla Combo.

The Valhalla Combo? What does Valhalla mean? The term sounds
sort of familiar. And why were they called that?

The baru of Kanbaru and the hara of Senjougahara were put

together to get baruhara or Valhalla. Valhalla is the heavenly
temple Odin lives in in Norse mythology. The spirits of warriors
that died in battle are invited in, so it is known as the holy ground
of the god of war.

Oh, so it also takes the god from Kanbaru and the battlefield
from Senjougahara.[18]

And that was the Valhalla Combo.

I see

It fit too perfectly.

Some people did come up with clever names even if it was just for a
nickname, but the difficult level for this one was so high and it had
such a lovely ring to it that most people would simply be impressed
upon hearing it. This left me at a loss as to what to say, but I
suppose thats just the cruel way you end up looking at it when
youre in charge of the witty retorts.

Well, since they were a combo, I suppose they at least got along to
a certain extent. Senjougahara-san was on the team right up to the
point she graduated, so at the very least they had an association
through both being on sports teams.

You know everything, dont you?

I do not know everything. I only know what I know.

That was our usual exchange.

At any rate, I felt like I was now better able to read between the
lines of what was going on.

But what was I to do now that I had read between the lines?
What was I going to do about the lines themselves?

This may be repeating a question I asked you before, but

Senjougahara was a completely different person during middle
school, right?

Yes, she was. Still, even she has been changing a bit lately. She is
still very different from back then, though.

I see

She was changing.

She was changing, but only in things related to me.

And that was why she was different from the past.

Was she popular with her underclassmen?

Yes. She was popular with the boys and the girls both. Also, it
apparently was not limited to the underclassmen. When she had
upperclassmen, those upperclassman were quite affectionate
toward her, and she was of course well-liked by her classmates.

So she was popular with everyone be they young or old, man or

woman, hm?

This is only a difference of upperclassmen and underclassman, so I

do not think it is a matter of young or old. Even so, if I had to
choose, I would say she was most popular with the underclassman
girls. That is what you wanted to know, isnt it, Araragi-kun?

Im glad youre so perceptive.

The problem was she could be too perceptive.

It wasnt as bad as with Oshino, but it felt like she saw straight
through you.

But Araragi-kun, it is the current Senjoughara-san that you love,

not the old one, right?

Youre just like that fifth grader.

Incidentally, despite neither of us having ever told anyone,

everyone knew that Senjougahara and I were dating. Senjougahara
held the position of the docile A-student and she intended to remain
in that position, so she did not have any classmates to whom she
would tell something like that. The same could be said for me but
for different reasons. People had no reason to openly mock the idea,
so it wasnt something that spread like wildfire, but at some point it
had become something everyone was assumed to know.

Rumors could be frightening things.

It seemed to have taken some time for it to breach the wall between
the third year and the second year where it reached Kanbaru.
However, given that Senjougahara was well-known and that
Kanbaru had reason to take extra interest when it came to
Senjougahara, it seemed like it should have happened even quicker
than that, but I guess that is just how things are when it has to go
between classes.

You may be sick of hearing me say this, but make sure to keep a
proper and pure attitude toward your relationship, Araragi-kun. Do
not do anything that would even begin rumors that something
immoral was going on. Well, Senjougahara-san seems a proper girl,
so I doubt this will become anything untoward.

OhA proper girl, hm?

Come to think of it, Hanekawa still doesnt know about Senjougharas true
character

Our other classmates were one thing, but Senjougahara was quite
something to delude even Class Rep Hanekawa of the Strangely-
Shaped Wings who had known we were dating before we even
started dating. In that way, Senjougahara had indeed shown me a
side of her she had shown to no one else, but that did not make me
all that happy. When I said I wanted to see a side of her that was
special or exclusive, I was referring to something else.

But really, that sort of summed up the state of our relationship. She
would not even cook for me, so it certainly seemed unlikely it
would develop into anything untoward.

Yes.

Kanbaru had been rejected, so she knew of Senjougaharas true

character regardless of what may have happened in middle school.
And since she had called out to me while knowing that, Kanbaru
must have

Senjougahara-san is difficult, said Hanekawa suddenly.

I recalled that Hanekawa had said something similar before. Of

course, this was Hanekawa speaking, so she was not talking about
the difficulty of completing Senjougahara Hitagis route.
I do not intend to claim I really know what I am talking about, but
Senjougahara-san has created an impregnable field around herself.

Araragi-kun, you have one too. Everyone has a field around

themselves in the form of privacy. The main difference is how
strong this field is. You and Senjougahara-san have built that field
into thick castle walls to hide behind. Most of the people who do
that find social interaction itself to be irritating. Can you think of
anything like that?

For me? Or for Senjougahara?

For both of you.

Well, I can certainly think of something.

It was definitely true.

But in that case

But Araragi-kun, not liking social interaction and not liking people
are not the same thing.

What? Arent they, though?

In this world of ours / peoples comings and goings / can be quite

tiresome, said Hanekawa in a calm and composed voice. But I
happen to feel that / you are the one exception No matter how
bad at Japanese you are, surely you can understand what that
means. Do you understand what I am trying to say now?

Yes.
I had no choice but to respond that way.

I resented being treated like a child, though.

However, I could not think of anything to do but to thank her.

Thanks. Sorry about taking up all your time for these nonsensical
questions.

Oh, they are not nonsensical. Wanting to know about your

precious girlfriend is completely normal, said Hanekawa.

She had no problem saying something as embarrassing as that.

She really was the class rep among class reps.

However, I do not think you should be digging too deeply into

your lovers past. Make sure you are not doing this purely for fun,
Araragi-kun, and also make sure you only do this in moderation.

With that last obvious warning, she said bye bye and fell silent.

I was a bit confused as to why she had said bye but not hung up,
but I then recalled that I had taught her over spring break that
phone etiquette dictated that the one who called should hang up
first.

Shes so much of a stickler for the rules that it scares me

With that thought, I said See you at school tomorrow and hit the
end call button. I then closed my cell phone and put it away in my
back pocket.

Now, what was I to make of all that?

I had a certain level of understanding regarding how Senjougahara
spoke and how she acted. This was due to having been in a similar
position to her once and having experienced something similar to
her. So why did I sympathize more with Kanbaru?

There was something I wanted to do if I could.

If I only I had been able to.

At some point Senjougahara had begun to view kindness as a

hostile act. She would say it was none of the persons business, that
they were meddling, or that they were a bother. She had displayed
that aberrant philosophy of thought to me, but what I wanted to do
was not necessarily a kindness.

After all, I would be doing it for (hastily) calculated reasons. That

impudent side to it kept me from speaking it and even kept me
from openly thinking it.

But I could not help but think it.

I wanted Senjougahara to regain what she had lost.

I wanted Senjougahara to pick back up what she had cast aside.

After all, that was something I could absolutely never do.

Discussing this with Oshino wouldnt help. That cheerful bastard

isnt the type to take care of things after the main problem is solved.
Well, I guess Im not really one to talkWait a second.

Suddenly remembering something for no real reason after you had

completely forgotten it was not all that unusual, and that was
precisely what happened here. I unzipped the travel bag hanging
from my shoulder and checked the contents. I knew I would not
find what I was looking for, but I could not help but put up that
vain struggle. As expected, the envelope Senjougahara had given
me was not in the bag.

It was the envelope that had the money for Oshino.

Did I leave it on the floor next to the cushion I had been sitting on?
Ahh, what should I do?

Since it was money, it would be best to take care of it as soon as

possible, but it was also not that urgent an issue. I could just have
her give it to me the next day at school. I doubted it was the case,
but it was possible I had put it in my pocket and it had fallen out at
some point as I was walking and speaking on the phone with
Hanekawa. For that reason, I considered calling Senjougahara to
checkbut no.

I had been walking while pushing my bike, so I had not covered all
that much distance. If I returned on the bike, I would arrive at the
Tamikura Apartments in no time at all, so heading back right then
was the best option. Given how late it was, that might mean
running into Senjougharas father if worse came to worse. However,
given how busy he seemed from the things Senjougahara had said,
the odds of that seemed slim enough to ignore.

It was true that a phone call could have solved it all, but I wanted to
take advantage of every chance I got to see Senjougahara.

I may not have known how to get it across to her, but I did want to
feel a romantic atmosphere even if just slightly.

Well, anyway.
I climbed onto my bike and turned it around.

As soon as I did, I began to wonder if it was raining.

But not because a raindrop had hit my cheek or anything like that.
Once I turned the bike around, I saw someone standing there as if
they had been following me this entire time.

That person was wearing a raincoat.

The hood was up and completely covering their head.

They also wore black rain boots and rubber gloves.

They were perfectly decked out for rain, but I couldnt feel a single
drop when I held out my hand.

When I looked up, I could see the stars in the sky.

In this rural town even more remote than a rural city, only a few
scattered clouds were rude enough to cut across the sky and block
the moonlight.

Um

Yeah

I knew exactly what was going on here. I knew far too well. Far, far
too well. It was the exact same thing I had experienced all too much
over spring break.

I couldnt help but give a half smile that did not suit the situation in
the slightest. It was out of place, but this felt so familiar it almost felt
nostalgic. I was also reminded of my experience with Hanekawa
over Golden Week.

If there was a problem hereyes, it would be that, unlike during

spring break, I was no longer immortal or a vampire.

I could hardly remain calm with this going on, but remaining calm
mattered most when it came to determining just what kind of
opponent I was dealing with here. In other words, I had gained a bit
of experience with these things over the past few months and had
grown somewhat accustomed to them.

To Oddities, that is.

I was fine if this was a physically harmless Oddity like the snail
with Hachikuji on Mothers Day, but my instincts were telling me to
flee. No, it wasnt my instincts. It was the instincts of the legendary
vampire that still lived inside my body to some small extent.

I made a split-second decision and jumped more like fell from

my bike in order to turn it around again.

That decision proved wise, but in exchange I forever lost my

precious, precious mountain bike. The raincoat leaped toward me
too fast to visually follow and their left fist slammed into the center
of the mountain bikes handlebars just after I jumped out of the
way. The mountain bike bent, dented, and was blown away like
weightless scraps of paper caught in an intense whirlwind. It
slammed into a telephone pole and stopped, but it had already lost
any hint of its original form as a mountain bike.

If I hadnt dodged, that would have been me.

Right?
The pressure of the wind whipped up by the fist was enough to tear
my clothing.

Similarly, the strap of my travel bag tore and it fell from my

shoulder to my feet.

Th-this is completely different.

Even my bitter smile tensed at this.

Even if it hadnt hit me, simply being nearby had brought such an
astounding presence. Even if it couldnt hope to match the
legendary vampire, the whirling pressure was still enough to
remind me of it. This Oddity came with physical fear.

This was nothing like Mothers Day.

It was definitely more like spring break.

I had lost my bike, but could I maybe run away on foot?

Based on what I had seen of the raincoats movements (or rather,

what I hadnt seen), they moved too quickly to see and escaping on
foot would be an impossible task.

Also, even if I could run away, I doubted I could turn my back on

this Oddity. Turning my back on and looking away from this
raincoat scared me more than anything else. It was a primordial fear
of which I couldnt hope to rid myself.

I take back what I said.

I wasnt accustomed to this sensation in the slightest.

It didnt matter how much experience I had.

I dont even like thinking back on it.

The raincoat spun around to face me. The hood was pulled so far
over their head that I couldnt see the face within. In fact, before
even thinking about the face, it looked more like a deep cave. It was
so very, very deep that I couldnt see anything inside.

It seemed missing from this world.

It seemed lost to this world.

Then the raincoat faced me and raised their left fist again.

I couldnt hope to dodge something that fast with my reflexes alone,

but just like when they had destroyed my mountain bike, it was an
utterly straightforward movement. Gathering my resolve and
reacting at that first movement allowed me to just barely dodge it
and that dodged left fist easily and simply punched right into the
cement block wall behind me. It was like they had been launched by
an aircraft catapult.

That destructive force seemed like a bad joke. In my shock, I

decided to use the time it took the raincoat to pull their hand from
the cement block wall to stand back up. In other words, I assumed I
would have a few seconds of safety while they acted like a monkey
with their hand stuck in a jar, but that assumption was far too nave.
It didnt apply here. Starting from where the left hand was piercing
it, several meters of the wall noisily crumbled like a dam bursting
from a single hole.

It was a familiar scene.

I didnt even get an instant of safety.

As if twisting their body, that left fist flew directly toward me.
There was no initial movement or motion this time; they simply
punched at me with all their might from where they were.

It was the same catapult-like attack.

I couldnt dodge or even defend in time.

I couldnt even tell where I had been punched.

My vision immediately rotated once, twice, thrice, and then four

times. As if my thought pathways had been shaken, intense
gravitational acceleration poured down on me from every direction,
the entire world around me grew more and more distorted, and I
was finally slammed face-down into the asphalt.

I felt my entire body scraping along the ground.

I felt like a grated radish.

However, it hurt.

And if it hurt, I was still alive.

My entire body hurt. The most pain was in my stomach, so that may
have been where I was punched. I quickly tried to get up, but my
legs were trembling far too much and all I could manage was to roll
onto my back.

The raincoat was quite far away. Or it seemed so, anyway. I thought
it might have been an illusion, but it wasnt. They really were that
far away. I had apparently been knocked that far with just the one
attack. It really was a catapult.

The contents of my gut feltill.

I recognized this type of pain.

It wasnt my bones.

Most likely, a few of my organs had ruptured.

But even if some of the contents had been destroyed, I checked and
found that the overall shape of my body had survived.

Oh, I get it. Bikes and people arent constructed the same, so the same
exact punch isnt going to turn me into scraps like that. Way to go, joints.
Viva muscles.

That said, I wasnt going to be moving anytime soon with this kind
of damage.

And the raincoat was approaching me. This time, it was a leisurely
movement that almost seemed to burn the image into my retinas.
Another attack or two or three just to be sure and this would be
over, so they had no reason to rush.

It made sense. It was a good decision.

But what was this?

This Oddity almost seemed to be attacking random people. After

crushing my bike and breaking that cement block wall, it was
already clear this was not a person, no matter how humanoid
they looked. But then, why was this Oddity attacking me?
Oddities always had an appropriate reason.

They werent complete mysteries.

They were logical. They had rules behind them.

That was the greatest thing I had learned from Oshino and from my
time with that beautiful vampire. Therefore, I could conclude that
this Oddity also had some reason for what it was doing, but I
couldnt think of anything.

What was the cause?

I thought back on what had happened that day.

I thought back on who I had met that day.

Hachikuji Mayoi.

Senjougahara Hitagi.

Hanekawa Tsubasa.

My two little sisters, my homeroom teacher, my classmates whose

faces I couldnt quite remember, and

As I went over the names in my mind, the final name on the list was
Kanbaru Suruga.

At that point, the raincoat turned.

That humanoid body faced the exact opposite direction.

They immediately took off running and vanished.

It was so sudden that I was left speechless.

Eh? Ehh?

Why this all of a sudden?

As the pain ruling my body shifted from dull to sharp, I looked up

into the sky. I could still see the stars and moon beautifully shining
there. The scene seemed horribly at odds with the faint scent of
blood coming from my body.

The strong flavor of blood filled my mouth.

My organs had definitely been damaged. My guts had been mixed

up quite nicely. But, well, this wasnt going to kill me. It didnt
require a trip to the hospital either. Even if I wasnt immortal
anymore, I still had some healing power remaining. If I rested for
the night, I would recover well enough. I had escaped this one with
my life.

But

The memory of the moment just before being punched came to

mind for no real reason. The raincoats left fist had flown toward
me. This flashback zoomed in on that fist. The rubber glove must
have torn from the friction when punching the bike or piercing the
wall because four holes had formed at the base of the fingers. Those
holes looked as much like a cave as the inside of the hood. They
seemed missing or lost.

But I could see the left fist inside. It looked just like a beasts hand.
Araragi-kun.

I heard a voice from overhead.

It was a flat voice so cold it had dropped below freezing.

I looked up and saw similarly icy and emotionless eyes staring

down at me. It was Senjougahara Hitagi.

Hi, long time no see.

Yes, long time no see.

It had been a long, long less than an hour.

You forgot something, so I came to deliver it.

She held out her right hand to shove an envelope in front of my

eyes. I could tell without having it quite so close, but it was the
envelope containing the one hundred thousand yen she needed to
pay Oshino.

So blatantly forgetting what I gave you is a crime worthy of the

ultimate punishment, Araragi-kun.

Yeahsorry.

Apologizing will not convince me to forgive you. I ran after you,

planning to torment you with all my might, but it would seem you
have already punished yourself. That is an impressive level of
loyalty.

Im not really the type to punish myself.

There is no need to hide it. In light of that loyalty, I will half
forgive you.

She was going to lighten my sentence but not pardon me.

It seemed the Court of Senjougahara operated under some strict

rules.

But joking aside, she said. Were you hit by a car? I saw what
seemed to be the destroyed remains of your beloved bicycle. More
than destroyed, it was stabbed into a telephone pole. I dont see
how that would happen unless you were hit by an entire convoy.

Umm

You remember the license number, dont you? I will take revenge
for you. I will start by fully reducing the car to scraps and then I will
torture the driver until they bow down and beg me to hit and kill
them with a bicycle.

Senjougahara Hitagi had no problem making such dangerous

claims.

I was relieved to find everything was so normal. It was strange and

kind of funny that Senjougaharas sharp tongue was what made me
truly realize I was still alive.

No, I fell all on my own. I wasnt paying attention to where I was

goingI was on the phone while pedalingand I ran right into the
telephone pole
Oh, I see. Thenyes. How about I at least destroy that telephone
pole?

That was only an outburst of anger.

It wasnt even getting back at anyone.

That would cause problems for the local residents, so how about
you dont?

I see But those injuries seem light for slamming into that sturdy-
looking cement block wall hard enough to destroy it. Araragi-kun,
you have a very soft body. I am impressed. I am sure that softness
will come in handy someday. Lets seeyou dont need an
ambulance, right?

Right

Had Senjougahara gone out of her way to bring that envelope to me

because she too wanted to take advantage of any chance to see me?
She had probably intended to take a bus and drop it off at my
house. That possibility made me honestly happy, even if it still
wasnt quite to the level of a tsundere.

And she had saved me by showing up here.

Even if she hadnt done it intentionally, the raincoat seemed to have

vanished when she had shown up.

Ill be able to move after I rest a little.

I see. Then I will provide a generous service for you.

Senjougahara placed her feet on either side of my head as I lay on
my back. I had already touched on her fashion that day, but she was
wearing a long skirt. She was not wearing stockings, so I could see
her bare, slender legs. And from my angle, the length of her skirt
didnt matter much.

Enjoy yourself until you can move again.

To be entirely, honest, I was pretty sure I could already stand up if I

had tried, but I decided to lie there and think for a while longer. My
thoughts werent going to be very productive, but I still did it.

I thought about Senjougahara and about the following day.

005

Kanbaru Suruga's house was at a distance from our school that took
about 30 minutes to travel by bike. Or half an hour at a running
pace. At first the thought crossed my mind to ride by bike with
Kanbaru sitting at the back, but that seemed implicitly banned
between the two of us. Having two people on a bike is dangerous,
and in any case it's illegal. Well, maybe that was why, or simply
because Kanbaru was reluctant to consider that possibility of sitting
in the back and ending up holding on to me. If so, I considered not
riding and just walking alongside her, or just leaving my bike at
school, however Kanbaru simply said "I don't really care, just ride
your bike". As I was just thinking "So what should I do then?",
Kanbaru simply said "Then let's go, follow me" and dashed off. She
was like this too when she was stalking me but, out of the
numerous means of transportation available such as by walking,
bicycle, automobile, or train, Kanbaru always chose "dashing",
thinking it no different that any of the others. I doubt that even
among the more athletically inclined, that there were many like her.
Kanbaru guided my bicycle with the brisk tap, tap tap rhythm of
her feet and her left arm wrapped up in a white bandage. As we
arrived at our destination, Kanbaru appeared to have barely broken
into a sweat and didn't even need to catch her breath.

Before us stood a magnificent traditional Japanese manor. The kind

that seemed to have a long history. Despite the plaque on the gate
reading Kanbaru clearly indicating that this was, without a doubt,
Kanbaru's residence, I was hesitant to enter into the manor with its
stately atmosphere.

Well it's not like I had much of a choice now.

It felt like a Buddhist shrine that I would go visit on a social studies

field trip, and I entered the manor with it's hard to describe
atmosphere. At the end of a hallway looking out on a traditional
garden with a shishi-odoshi, Kanbaru opened the sliding door of
her room and we entered.

... I was quite surprised that she would let her senpai, who she
wasn't even on particularly good terms with, into her room in its
current state.

Her futon was left spread out on the floor, clothes (including
panties) were strewn all around, as were books of all sort,
textbooks, novels and manga, some open and some closed. It almost
seemed like her storehouse, with cardboard boxes piled up into
mounds in the corners. The worst atrocity was the garbage casually
left not in garbage bags but just on a random tatami, or sometimes,
to the best of her ability, shoved into the plastic bags from the
neighborhood convenience store and then left lying around. Rather,
it seemed as though the concept of a container for housing garbage
was entirely foreign to the room.

Even with its expansive 12 tatami space.

Not even a single space to start going in from.

"Sorry that it's a little messy"

Kanbaru said clearly, turning around, with her left hand in front of
her chest and an innocent grin on her face. I see, it might have just
been a reactionary comment to the situation depending on how I
interpret it, but don't people usually say that to be modest when
letting guests into an at least somewhat organized room?

Flooding on top and burning on the bottom. *a riddle usually used

to describe a bath*.

It fit the picture of the room perfectly.

Wow...

Even her hygiene products were lying all around.

I instinctively looked away.

I feel like if I kept looking, more things that were not meant to be
seen by my eyes would come out. I think it's great to have self
confidence, that's not the same as not having any shame, Kanbaru
Suruga...

Ah.
I wonder if Senjougahara has something like this. But then again, in
Senjougahara's case, there wasn't even a single speck of dust in her
room... I feel like her character, along with her personality, got
influenced quite a lot by Senjougahara during junior high, but
actually got worse and turned out like this.

"Make yourself at home. I admire your sensitive side when you're a

little nervous going into a the room of a girl you don't know that
well, Araragi-senpai, but now's not the time for that."

"... Kanbaru"

"Mhmm?"

"I know now's not the time, but can I ask you for a favor."

"Sure. Say anything you want. I wouldn't refuse a request from you,
Araragi-senpai."

"One hour, actually, half an hour's fine... Just give me some time to
clean up this room. And a big garbage bag."

It's not like I'm a clean freak, I don't really even keep my room that
clean, but this was just too horrible, one could even call it cruel.
Kanbaru stood and started at me with a puzzled look on her face, as
if she didn't even understand what I had just said, however,
without any particular reason to refuse, she simply said "OK" and
left to get a garbage bag.

Fast forward.

I suppose.
Of course, the disastrous wreckage that was Kanbaru's room wasn't
so soft that much could be done about it in a mere half an hour. And
in any case, this still being the room of a girl who I didn't know that
well, there were areas that I could and couldn't ethically, or rather
morally, touch. So, I gathered up the garbage and organized (simply
sorted by size, as there weren't even any bookshelves in Kanbaru's
room) the various books and magazines in an admittedly random
way, cleaning the square room into more of a circle. The room was
at least at a state where I could look at it after the futon was folded
and stowed in the closet and clothes folded and placed in a corner.
At the very least, there was space for Kanbaru and I to sit and face
each other.

"Most impressive, Araragi-senpai. So this was what color the

tatamis in my room were. I wonder how many years it's been since
I've seen the floor."

"You count that by years...?"

"Sorry."

"Next time let's agree on a day... actually, maybe a day and let me
sleep over to work on it the next day, just let me clean this room up.
I'll bring some detergent and bleach and all the rest of the stuff and
give this room a serious cleaning."

"Sorry for having to make you go through the trouble, Araragi-

senpai. I don't really have any skills except for basketball so, I'm not
really good at things like cleaning up.

"..."

It was quite awkward hearing her say that still with her confident
smile... In the half an hour I was cleaning, seeing Kanbaru just sit
idly looking quite bored and not even attempting to help, it seemed
as though Kanbaru wasn't lazy or found cleaning troublesome, she
was simply just bad at it. Even though it wasn't something that I
should really concern myself with, this was definitely something
that could not, and should not be shown to her fans at school who
treated her like a sports star. I wonder if she never invites any of her
friends from class to her house... I guess even her friends wouldn't
be as bad as her kouhais from clubs. In the worst case scenario, this
might be a source of psychological trauma for them. Among the
pieces of garbage now inside garbage bags, there were numerous
empty crushed soft drink cans, candy wrappers and instant noodle
cups... How the hell does someone who eats like this become an
athlete at the national level?

Famous people often become even more popular with these sort of
absentminded episodes, but this was way too much. There was no
way this could be moe...

"Well, now then"

It was the next day.

The day after Friday.

Saturday.

Having two days off at the end of the week had already been
accepted as common sense all around the world, however in our
well known university feeder school, Naoetsu Private High School,
there were normal classes even on Saturday. Even as tomorrow
became today, I was unable to come a conclusion, and so in the
break time between first and second period I headed to the second
years' building. In any case, with Kanbaru being such a celebrity, it
was the obvious choice to see which class she was in. Second year
second class. The students in the classroom were quite excited by
the arrival of a third year (as a third year this was both a nostalgic
and new experience). Just as I expected of Kanbaru, she came over
to where I was waiting in the hallway in her long majestic strides.

"Yo, Araragi-senpai"

"Hey, Kanbaru. I have a little favor I want to ask you"

"I see, then"

Without a single question, Kanbaru replied.

Almost as if this was pre-established harmony.

"After school, I want you to come to my house"

So

Kanbaru's house, a traditional Japanese manor.

If we were just going to talk, it didn't need to be at Kanbaru's house,

it could have been in an empty classroom, or the on the roof, or on
the sports track, or even on some fast food restaurant around here. I
had told Kanbaru, but it seemed as though she had some specific
reason to talk at her house.

If there was a reason, then I would go along with it.

No need to ask.

"So, how should we start, Araragi-senpai. I'm not great with people
so I'm not sure what I should say but, anyway"

Kanbaru quickly crossed her legs and bowed her head towards me.
"I'd like to apologize for yesterday night"

"... Uh"

I had recovered in that one day, but I still felt some remaining pain.
After gently touching my stomach, I nodded.

"So that was you"

Raincoat.

Rubber gloves. Rubber boots.

I had found them in the pile of clothes when we cleaning.

Without even having to say.

"'So that was you', you sure sound impatient, Araragi-senpai. You
certainly are impressive. You saw through it right? Otherwise you
wouldn't have visited me."

"Not really. I was just guessing. I just looked at stuff like your build,
outline and silhouette. And among the people who would've
known that I had gone to Senjougahara's house to study.
Narrowing it down from those conditions and thinking about it...
Well, it wouldn't have been a big deal even if I came to visit and I
was wrong."

"Hmm, I see. Most intelligent"

Kanbaru appeared genuinely impressed.

"Is it like how some guys can tell girls apart just from their hips?"

"That's completely different!"

How the hell could I tell what your hips looked like under that
raincoat anyway!

"Sorry, that's not what I meant"

Kanbaru, once again, bowed her head.

It seemed like quite a sincere apology.

But, if that's not what she meant, then what did she mean? That was
clearly targeting me but, could it be something else entirely?

"... Well, apologies aside, I just want to know the reason. Actually,
the reason's anyways"

The reason.

I already had an idea.

Considering the situation, I wouldn't say it but, it was the first clue
that lead me to think that Kanbaru was the person in the raincoat.

But

"Anyways, I want to ask you about that"

That superhuman strength.

Kaii.

Able to destroy a bicycle like ripping paper.

To destroy a concrete wall in a single strike.

"I wanted to ask you. What exactly, are . . ."

"Hmm. I guess if we had to start it would be with that huh. But first
... Araragi-senpai, I want to ask you, are you the type of person who
can believe in crazy things?"

"Crazy things?"

So like aah, I see.

Kanbaru doesn't know about my body's condition. She wouldn't

have been able to see my wounds on my immortal body healing in
the span of a couple minutes, so there's no way she would know. So
that must be why she asked my that no, that's not it.

Even if she didn't know about me, Kanbaru knows about

Senjougahara. She knew about Senjougahara's crazy secret even
before me. So she knows that there's no way I don't know about
Senjougahara's secret now that I'm her boyfriend. That means, right
now, Kanbaru might be scoping me out.

"Do you get what I'm asking you? I mean, can you believe things
that you haven't seen with your own eyes?"

"I only believe things that I have seen with my own eyes. So I
believe everything that I've seen. Of course including
Senjougahara's case."

"... Really? You knew that too?."

"However," Kanbaru said, looking neither particularly embarrassed

or guilty.

"I don't want you to misunderstand. I haven't just been following

you around because I wanted to know about Senjougahara."
"Huh...? Really?"

I was sure that was it.

I thought for sure that she was seeing whether the rumors that
Araragi Koyomi and Senjougahara Hitagi were going out were true
or not. And that after hearing that yesterday I went to
Senjougahara's house for a one on one study session her suspicions
were confirmed.

Well, that's probably the case.

I don't think that there would be any errors in that line of thinking.

But now, is she saying that there was another reason she was
stalking me?

"Weren't you and Senjougahara called the Valhalla Combo, when

you were on the basketball team and Senjougahara was on the track
team?" *Valhalla in Japanese is Baruhara. Kanbaru and
Senjougahara*

"Yeah, that's right. I'm impressed that you knew that too. I must
have underestimated you, Araragi-senpai. Up until now I'd thought
that I held you in the highest esteem possible, but it seems as
though I was still underestimating you. You may even be too
impressive for me to even comprehend with my sense of values. I
feel like the better I know you, the further apart we feel."

"... I was just asking you a question you know?"

Managing to not sound sarcastic or like a suck-up after calling me

all these things almost seems like an art in and of itself.
"I've heard about the name's origin. Flows surprisingly well doesn't
it?"

"Of course it does. I thought of it."

Kanbaru appeared puffed up with pride.

... She thought of it herself.

It's been a while since I've felt this sad...

"I worked really hard to come up with that you know. By the way I
also thought of the nickname Kanbaru Suruga-chan for myself but
unfortunately that never caught on."

"I'm disappointed too."

"I see. You can sympathize with me."

Sure.

I'm disappointed in your sense of what you thought would catch

on.

"You truly are a compassionate person, Araragi-senpai. Well now

that I think about it, it's a bit long for a nickname. I guess it never
would have caught on."

"I don't think that's the problem."

It seems like Kanbaru had nice friends during junior high

Including Senjougahara back then...

"Moving on from the Valhalla Combo, it seems like your intuition is
quite good, so you might already know what I'm about to explain to
you. During junior high, Senjougahara and I actually, before we
talk about that, there's something I want you to see, Araragi-senpai.
That's what I originally planned to use some of your precious time
and have you go through the trouble of coming to my house for."

"Something you want me to see? Ah, I get it. That thing you wanted
me to see was at your house so that's why we couldn't talk at
school."

"Actually, that's not why. I guess, it would stand out at school, and
I'm worried about other people seeing... As much as I can, it's
something I don't want other people to see."

Saying that, Kanbaru began unwrapping the white bandage on her

left arm. She took off the fastener holding the bandage around her
arm and starting from the side closest to her fingers, she

I remembered.

That night.

When the person in the raincoat destroyed my bike, or when they

smashed through the concrete wall, or when they ripped apart my
organs

It was all, with the fist in their left hand.

"To be honest, it's not something that I like other people seeing.
After all, I'm still a girl."

She unwrapped the entire bandage and folded up the sleeves of

her uniform.
And what I saw, extending from beyond the elbows of Kanbaru's
slender and feminine soft looking arm was the arm of a wild
beast, angular and covered in thick black fur.

Sticking out of the broken rubber gloves.

The smell, of a beast.

"Well, this is it."

"..."

Those sort of gloves couldn't be something from Muppets clearly.

The length and the slenderness of the gloves was clearly unnatural,
and apart from simple physical observations, I had witnessed
something similar, similar but so different, during Golden Week. So
I understood what I was seeing.

This was, a kaii.

Kaii.

It looked like the arm of a wild beast however, I had no idea what
kind. It appeared like it could be from any animal, and yet not from
any. While looking like everything, it was a part of nothing.
However, if I had to say, judging from the five fingers and the
rather long nails at the end of each

I don't think that this is good way of describing a part of a girl's

body however but I said

"A monkey's arm."

"It looks like a monkey's arm."

Monkey.

The common name for the primates, excluding humans.

"Ooh"

From her expression Kanbaru appeared, for some reason

impressed.

She slapped her knees.

"Araragi-senpai, you truly have unfathomably keen insight. I'm in

awe, your eyes must be different from the rest of us. To be able to
discern the nature of this arm with just a single look, I'm at a loss for
words. Your knowledge must be of a different caliber than that a
mere commoner such as myself could ever accumulate. So it
appears no other explanations are necessary."

"Don't be convinced just because I said it!"

Like I'd let you stop explaining here!

We've just started!

"I just said what I saw, I haven't made any conclusions."

"Really? The Monkey's Paw was the title of a short story by William
Wymark Jacobs. The idea of a monkey's paw has been used in all
sorts of media and it's split off into lots of"

"I didn't know about that at all."

I told her the truth.

"Really?", said Kanbaru.

"To be able to see the truth without knowing a single thing, Araragi-
senpai, you must have been chosen by someone up there."

"... Well, I have been told that I have a pretty good intuition."

"I see. I think rather highly of myself, although not nearly as highly
you, Araragi-senpai, for having the good sense to place my trust in
you at first sight."

"I see..."

I don't think you have very good sense in your standards.

Uh, I looked back at Kanbaru's left arm.

A beast's paw a monkey's paw.

"C-Can I touch it?"

"Sure, right now it should be fine."

"I-I see."

With Kanbaru's permission, I gently put my hand on her wrist.

Timidly, full of fear.

Texture, feeling... warmth, pulse.

It was alive.

I knew it, this must be a living type of kaii.

... Even being completely fine with having her room seen while it
was like this, Kanbaru seemed uncomfortable having her left arm
seen. Of course she would be, with the excuse that she sprained her
arm while training being so convenient. The bandage was not to
protect her injury, but to hide her arm. She had never shown any of
clumsiness with her left arm or unconscious habit of protecting the
left side of her body that would be expected from a person who had
sprained their left hand, which I had thought was strange, but
looking back at that now and saying that doesn't seem very
convincing.

But.

It was certain that she couldn't play basketball with that hand.

Without thinking, I squeezed her wrist.

"Don't make weird noises!"

She instinctively pulled her hand away.

"It's because you touched it in a weird way!"

"I didn't touch you in a weird way at all!"

"I'm ticklish!"

"That doesn't mean you should make weird noises that mess with
how your character's been so far!"

Now that I think of it, Senjougahara also acts out of character a lot.
Of course, Kanbaru's way was completely different from how
Senjougaraha does it now, but if Kanbaru goes out of character like
this, does that mean that this was Senjougahara's gag in junior high?
"You might have forgotten, but Kanbaru, this is your room, in your
house. What do you think would happen to me if your parents
heard you making noises like that?"

"Ah, don't worry about that."

Kanbaru said in her lighthearted tone.

"Don't worry about my parents."

"... Ok then"

What...?

What was with that expression, like she didn't want to touch the
matter, or blatantly did not want to have that issue be probed into
further. But she said those words, which were out of character more
than anything else before, in her usual lighthearted tone.

"Anyways," Kanbaru broke the ice while flexing her hand open and
close.

"As you can see, right now I can control it according to my will, but
there are times when it doesn't. No. Rather, it moves against my
will, I guess"

"It moves against your will?"

"I guess against my will, or my feelings. I guess it's hard to

understand. Having it be explained by me when I don't even fully
understand it. It might be pretty obvious but, while it was definitely
me who attacked you yesterday night, I have almost no recollection
of that."
Kanbaru explained.

"I guess it's like being half asleep, or a daydream, it's not like I don't
remember at all but, it's like watching something out of a TV, like
I'm not actually there."

"A trance."

I interrupted her explanation.

"It's called a trance... Kaii that possess humans split apart the
body and the mind."

In my case it wasn't like that in Hanekawa's case, in Hanekawa's

cat's case, it was just like that. That's why Hanekawa barely
remembers anything about the Golden Week when she came into
contact with a kaii. I guess the current situation is close when it
happened to Hanekawa, there were also changes to her body.Y

"You sure know a lot, Araragi-senpai. I see, so they're called kaii,

these sort of things"

"Well I'm not exactly an expert myself. It's just that recently I've
been running into these sort of experiences a lot, and I know a guy
who knows a lot about"

Oshino.

This was Oshino's territory.

His domain.

" this sort of stuff."

"OK. I see, I'm lucky that you're such a good person. We wouldn't
have been able to talk if you had driven me out as soon as you saw
my arm. And, I would have been quite hurt."

"It's fine. Relax, I've seen enough crazy things to get used to them by
now. Including Senjougahara's case too."

At this rate, I suppose that afterwards I should explain that I had

been involved with kaii and that I had temporarily become a
vampire... Normally in terms of accountability, I should have
explained that beforehand, but now there were still too many things
that I didn't understand about Kanbaru's left hand.

"Although, I would say that I was still I bit surprised. Or that it gave
me hiccups, if I were a fifth grader. But now with the biggest shock
out of the way, I'm pretty confident that nothing afterwards will
surprise me."

"I see, of course that's exactly why I showed you my arm first.
Getting the hardest part out of the way first. Now that we're done
with that, let's get to the real issue at hand."

Kanbaru continued on with her smile.

"I'm lesbian."

"..."

My chin fell to the floor. Like in one of Fujiko Fujio's mangas.

"Uh, oh"
Seeing my reaction, Kanbaru said "That might have been a bit blunt
for your, Araragi-senpai, since you're a boy. Hmm" while tilting
her head.

"Let me rephrase that. I like yuri."

"That's the same thing!"

I shouted, trying to act like myself.

Wait, what? What's going on?

So Kanbaru and Senjougahara were called the Valhalla Combo in

junior high? Just as senpai and kouhai? And Senjougahara called
Kanbaru "that girl"? And yesterday Senjougahara said that she had
never broken up with a man? So did she mean that?

"Wrong. Senjougahara-senpai was just my unrequited love. To me,

Senjougahara-senpai was my pure and perfect, ideal senpai. It was
enough just being by her side."

"Just being by her side..."

That sounds nice.

That sure sounds nice.

But she just called it her unrequited love like it was perfectly
normal. This girl...

Hachikuji, the "girl in you" was completely wrong... Wait, calm

down, I can't just deny everything without hearing Kanbaru's side
of the story first. Right, maybe that's normal for girls nowadays.
Maybe I'm just out of date. I should think about this more lightly,
more liberally.

"So, yuri... I see."

"That's right, yuri."

Kanbaru seemed happy for some reason.

But, all things considered.

Whether it's vampires or cats or crabs or snails, class presidents or

sick girls or elementary school kids, catgirls or tsunderes or lost
kids, or everything just turning out to be about yuri. This world is,
how should I say it, sure tries hard, or maybe it's just greedy...

It just does whatever it likes.

I wonder if Senjougahara knows that Kanbaru's lesbian... Judging

from how Kanbaru talks about her, she probably doesn't. Well,
whether she knew or not, it probably didn't make much of a
difference to Senjougahara in junior high.

The stars of the track team and the basketball team.

The Valhalla Combo.

"Senjougahara was popular with everyone, but I think that the way
I loved her was different from everyone else. I'm proud of that. I
could have even died for her back then. Dead or alive."

"..."

I'm not really sure whether that sounded cool or not.

"Wow, I just said something pretty cool. Mixing up "I love" and
"alive" was pretty good if I may say so myself. Wasn't it, Araragi-
senpai."

"At first I wasn't really sure, but after adding that on the end, I'm
pretty sure about my score."

It wasn't cool at all.

Anyways.

I asked Kanbaru to continue her story.

"Continuation isn't really a great word, this didn't even happen that
long ago. It guess this is where the story joins up with the present.
The reason I chose Naoetsu High School in the first place was to
follow Senjougahara-senpai."

"I thought as much... I guess I'm more convinced that surprised by

that."

Depending on how she interprets it, that might have sounded

insulting to her current basketball teammates, so I'll just keep this in
my head. Being the ace of her junior high basketball team, she
should have been able to get into a more sports oriented school and
played more seriously. I wondered why Kanbaru would choose
Naotsu High School, it being a university feeder school which was
best, completely apathetic about any of its clubs, including the
basketball team. What motivation would she have?

Undying love.

I guess that's a bit much.

"I was so attracted to Senjougahara-senpai that I would have eaten a
candy that she had spit out."

"..."

Is that something you should really be telling people?

"But, Araragi-senpai. That one year after Senjougahara-senpai

graduated from junior high and I was a third year, was completely
grey."

"Grey?"

"My grey yuri life."

"..."

She sure likes using the word "yuri", doesn't she.

Whatever.

"Thinking about my grey yuri life with my grey brain cells."

"That wasn't funny at all."

Stop trying to insert random puns whenever you talk.

She's way too calm while we're talking about this sort of stuff.

"You sure are strict, Araragi-senpai. Your standards are too high for
me. But it's strange, when I think of it as you just trying to help me
by saying, I find that I can accept it."

"So... what happened during that year of your grey yuri life?"
"Right, during that one year, I came to know just how important of
a person Senjougahara-senpai was to me. Actually, that one year
when we were apart might have been much more important to me
than the two years we were together. So I decided that, if I got
accepted to Naoetsu High school, I would confess to her. And after
that, I spent all my days and nights studying to get in."

Kanbaru spoke in her usual tone full of confidence, but she seemed
to be blushing a little. I guess this is just her getting embarrassed
Crap, she was pretty cute. I was just confused when she started
stalking me, but this was the first time I thought of Kanbaru as my
cute kouhai. I felt a new "yuri" region of moe sprouting inside me...

Somehow, I don't really even care about Kanbaru's left arm

anymore... Wait, her left arm was supposed to be the main topic in
the first place...

"Not even just a candy. Gum. I would chew a piece of gum that
Senjougahara-senpai had spit out. I was that attracted to her."

"I don't get your standards at all..."

Couldn't you find a better way of explaining this?

"But,"

She said, her tone dropping conspicuously.

"Senjougahara-senpai changed."

"Ah..."

"Completely."
A crab.

Senjougahara Hitagi met a crab. She lost many things and threw
away many things and rejected everything. Hanekawa was like
this too, but looking at it from the perspective of someone who
would have known Senjougahara in junior high, she had changed
so much that they could mistake her for a different person. To
Kanbaru, who put so much faith in her, she must not have even
wanted to believe how much Senjougahara had changed.

So much that she couldn't even believe what she had seen with her
own eyes.

"I heard that after she started high school, she got pretty sick, some
long term illness, and she quit the track team. I already knew about
that before. But, I never even imagined that she could change so
much. I thought it was just some bad rumor."

Serious. A heavy illness...

Well, that explanation isn't wrong... But to Senjougahara that illness

still isn't completely cured. Sort of like a chronic illness.

"But I was wrong. The rumors themselves were wrong, but they
weren't even close to how bad it actually was. I realized that
something serious must have happened to Senjougahara-senpai's
body, and I knew that I had to do something. I thought I had to save
her. Didn't I? Because I never forgot how much Senjougahara-
senpai helped me in junior high, how much I owed her. We were in
different years and different clubs, but she was so kind to me."

"That kindness..."
I wonder what meaning that kindness had for Senjougahara. But I
guess this isn't the time to talk about it, or ask.

"So I tried to help her. I wanted to help her. But she completely,
unequivocally, rejected me."

"I see."

I guess she wouldn't tell me how exactly she got rejected. She's
probably still trying to protect Senjougahara. Kanbaru would never,
no matter what happened, even if her mouth was getting torn apart,
say anything bad about Senjougahara.

As I thought, she had faced something as bad as, even more horrible
than what happened to me. That much was easy to deduce but...
Honestly, I didn't even want to ask.

For my sake, and Kanbaru's.

For Senjougahara's sake too.

A stapler.

"I thought that I could do something."

She said. She seemed like she couldn't even bare the shame
anymore and regretted what she had done from the bottom of her
heart. But still, she spoke in a forced casual tone.

"I thought that I could do something about whatever it was that

Senjougahara had. Even if I couldn't get rid of what was causing it,
even if I couldn't make whatever was happening to her any better, I
thought that by being by her side I could heal her heart."
"..."

"I sure was stupid wasn't I? I was naive. But thinking about it now,
it's quite funny."

Because Senjougahara wasn't looking for that at all

Saying that, Kanbaru looked down.

"'I never even thought of you as my friend, or my kouhai Not

then and not now'. She said straight to my face."

"Well..."

She would say something like that. Back then. She was fully loaded
with a weapons even more dangerous than her stationary, her
words.

"At first, I thought that meant that she thought of me as her lover.
But, that wasn't the case."

"You sure are positive."

"Right. But continuing, she made it even more clear to me. 'I just
pretended to be good friends with you because it would make me
more popular being friends with my nice underclassman. That's
why I was nice to you, that's why I played the part of the nice
senpai.'"

"She sure says some cruel things."

She wanted to hurt her.

So she would stay away.

But yesterday, Senjougahara called her "that girl" and called her her
kouhai from junior high, and admitted that they were friends in
junior high even if they weren't anymore. That might just be a
convenient explanation for me, but, still.

"I was pretty happy that she called me her nice underclassman."

She sure is positive.

Through and through.

"But, I realized how powerless I was. I was so conceited, thinking

that I could heal her just by being with her. Senjougahara-senpai
never wanted anyone by her side."

There really are people who aren't lonely, even when they're alone.

Normally, I would think that Senjougahara definitely fit into that

category. At least, she wasn't the type of person who would get
hang around a big group for no reason. I'm sure she was like that,
even when she was a sociable junior high student.

The difference between not being lonely even when you're alone.

And wanting to be alone.

Like the difference between being unsociable and hating people.

"So after that, I never approached Senjougahara-senpai again.

Because that was the one thing that she wanted from me. Of course,
there was no way I could forget Senjougahara-senpai But, if by
letting go, and doing nothing and staying away from her,
Senjougahara would be saved, even just a little bit, I could live with
that."
"... You,"

I wasn't sure what I should say. I was so impressed not with her
attitude, which you could even call pure, but by her describing her
choice not as "inevitable" or that she "had no choice" but as being
able to "live with it". She said that Senjougahara had changed, but
she let go of her by her own will.

She really was serious.

About Senjougahara.

From when she was in junior high to one year ago, her feelings only
grew stronger.

Even now.

"I was careful not to run into Senjougahara-senpai. I changed

everything I did to not run into Senjougahara in the hallways, not to
see each other during the morning assemblies, not to pass by each
other in the cafeteria. I took care of everything so that Senjougahara-
senpai wouldn't have to mind me, and I wouldn't have to mind her.
I knew that if I did well in any club's rumors about me would get
around, so I mixed fact and fiction into my own rumors and
controlled them."

No wonder her personality's so messed up. The rumors about her

never fit with each other.

I was convinced.

But still, being that thorough, it's almost like reverse stalking.
"That's how I spent my first year. It wasn't even grey, more like my
black yuri life. But after that, I got more reckless and into basketball,
I'm not sure whether it was for the better or not, but after that one
year, I found out about you, Araragi-senpai."

"..."

She seemed to have found out about me rather late considering how
much she worried about Senjougahara. It probably wasn't because it
took place over the course of two school years, but because she was
deliberately avoiding conversations about Senjougahara.

Nevertheless.

She found out about me, Araragi Koyomi.

"I couldn't hold myself back any longer, so for the first time in a
year, I approached Senjougahara-senpai by my own will. Or, I tried
to. Of course, over that one year there were a few careless mistakes,
but this was the first time I intentionally saw Senjougahara-senpai. I
saw Senjougahara-senpai and you, Araragi-senpai, talking away in
the classroom one morning. And she was smiling happily like I'd
never seen even in junior high."

"..."

I wonder how she was verbally abusing me back then when she was
smiling... That's about the only time that woman's expression ever
changes, let alone smiles.

"Do you understand?"

Kanbaru turned to face me.

"You were doing what I wanted to do so badly but I could never
do... like it was the easiest thing in the world."

"Kanbaru... that's"

"At first, I was jealous."

She spoke, emphasizing every word.

"I tried rethinking it,"

I could hear the overflowing emotion she was trying to control in

her voice.

"but in the end, I was still jealous."

She brought it to a close.

"..."

"Why couldn't it have been me? I was jealous of you and I

completely gave up on Senjougahara-senpai. I thought it'd have
worked if I were a man. And that it didn't because I was a woman. I
thought that even if she didn't need a friend or a kouhai, I could be
a lover. Then,"

Then, Kanbaru said, staring at me.

She looked at me, her eyes full of blame.

"Then, why couldn't it have been me?"

Even though I knew that she was my kouhai and a girl younger
than me, and that she probably wouldn't go crazy and grab at me, I
flinched.
I was afraid.

"I was jealous of you and I completely gave up on Senjougahara-

senpai. And I was dumbfounded. What was I thinking, 'healing
Senjougahara-senpai', 'letting go'. Those were all lies. That was all
just my ego. 'If I was fine with it then it was fine the way it was'. Did
I think that Senjougahara-senpai would praise me for that? I was
stupid. I was such a hypocrite. But, even still, I wanted
Senjougahara-senpai to be kind to me like she used to. I didn't care
if it as my ego or whatever, I just wanted to be by her side."

Kanbaru touched her left hand with her right hand.

Her hand of a beast.

"So, I wished on this hand."

006

There's probably no need to go into depth about the plot of William

Wymark Jacobs' story "The Monkey's Paw, but from my point of
view, knowing nothing about it, it seemed to be well written as a
monster, or maybe horror story. A by the books horror story, an
antique with a long history. From my point of view, knowing
nothing of it, it seemed slightly familiar, like it reminded me of
something.

I guess that's how classics are.

Kanbaru would probably say that, although it wasn't on the scale of

vampires, the monkey's paw was a pretty major item, arranged and
used in a variety of media in a variety of ways. Splitting off and
splitting off again, like a chart showing the genus and family of a
species, but despite the various differences between the versions, at
the base of all the variations, the single point tying them all
together, in other words, the most important factor that made the
monkey's paw what it was, was that.

Apparently, it granted the owner's wish.

But apparently, in a way not according to the owner's will.

It seemed it was those two points.

It was that sort of item, with a long history and story.

For example, if you wished to be rich, the next day someone in your
family would die and you would get the insurance money. For
example, if you wished to get promoted, the company would fall
into a slump and the top brass would get disposed of, and as a
result, you would get promoted into a company that fell into a
slump.

Like that.

Apparently, the monkey's paw was created in India by a miracle

worker in order to teach man to submit to and live according to fate,
lest they face horrible calamities. It boasted the ability to be able to
grant three men each three wishes each.

Upon hearing of it granting three wishes, the first thing that I was
reminded of was Arabian Nights, but I can't really remember what
kind of story that was, or how it ended. Of course throughout the
world, other versions of this story exist. The concept of a story
about an item that could grant any wish might just be quite
fundamental to humans, who are so controlled by their massive but
impossible dreams. Even among stories of the supernatural, "the
monkey's paw" is still the oldest.
"So that person you were talking about, his name's Oshino Meme?
Meme's written in katakana right?"

"Yeah. He's not as cute as you might think from his name though.
I'll tell you now, he's just an old dude who like aloha shirts so don't
expect too much. In any case, he doesn't look like that so just
prepare yourself."

"No... that's not what I meant. His name already leaves quite the
impression. Well, whatever. But "Meme" seems like a hard name to
find a nickname for."

"Now that you mention it, I'm a little interested in what people
called him when he was a kid... Actually, I can't even imagine him
ever being a kid."

Oshino's current residence were the ruins of four floored cram

school located a little bit away from a residential area, or more
simply, an abandoned building. Like most abandoned buildings, it
was the sort of place one wouldn't want to go to even if dared, and
wouldn't be regarded as a building by most people. More like a part
of the landscape. An old building that had weathered many years,
the kind that would topple to the ground completely destroyed if an
earthquake came along. Although despite it's appearance, it had
been at most a few years since a well known university prep school
opened up in front of the station and it had to close down. The
building brought it into clear focus how badly buildings decayed
even if not used by humans for a few years. The place couldn't even
really be called Oshino's residence, he was just an illegal squatter.
He had been living in this building covered in signs saying "Private
Property" and "Entrance Prohibited" since spring break for about 2
months now. Sleeping on a makeshift bed made of the desks
remaining inside the abandoned building and roaming around this
town all day.

Roaming around.

He didn't stay in one place all the time.

So, even as we went to see him, whether he was actually inside the
building or not was completely up to chance. There was quite an
element of chance to meeting Oshino, who had no cellphone to be
contacted at.

It was about an hour's ride from Kanbaru's Japanese manor.

Of course, for Kanbaru it was an hour's dash.

I looked up, staring at the abandoned cram school.

"By the way, Araragi-senpai, when you were attacked by a

vampire... that was your first time meeting a kaii right?"

"Yeah, probably."

I might have met one before and just not noticed.

So that was the first time I actually realized it.

"So that was during spring break, then Senjougahara, then me...
nothing's happened before, but now three in a row all of a sudden.
It seems like it's hinting at something."

"Maybe."

Actually, including Hanekawa and Hachikuji, it's been five in a row

but I'll just leave it at that and try to respect their privacy.
"Apparently, after you meet them once, they get easier to run into.
So I guess it'll just be like that for me from now on."

"That seems tough."

"Not entirely... it's not all bad. There are things that I've learned and
gotten because I've encountered kaii, because I've had these strange
experiences."

I meant to give my point of view but it turned out more like I was
just trying to change the subject.

But in reality, just thinking about what happened during spring

break makes me think that I'm just lying to myself and putting it in
a nice way.

With that unpleasant feeling, I looked at Kanbaru's left arm and the
white bandaged wrapped around it. I still have no idea what the
arm actually is, but having seen it, its length and shape did certainly
look strange even looking from the outside. It looked like Kanbaru
had wrapped the bandage over the same place a few times to make
it harder to tell though.

"I always thought that you and Senjougahara-senpai at least knew

each other since you've been in the same class since the first year all
the way up to third year. But from hearing your story, the first time
you've talked was about three weeks ago right, Araragi-senpai?"

"Well I'm not sure if that was the first time we'd ever talked, but if
she hadn't made that careless mistake I would have never found out
about her secret and we would probably have never started going
out. And if I hadn't known Oshino, I wouldn't have been able to
help Senjougahara in the first place... So I guess it was all a big
coincidence. Maybe I just had good luck. Or my bad luck wasn't
working very well. Kanbaru, it's just that you ended up finding out
about the monkey's paw and I ended up finding out about
vampires."

One year ago, when Kanbaru found out about Senjoughara's secret,
she was probably able to accept it so easily because she had already
known about the monkey's paw, like I had already known about the
vampire and the cat. So really, the biggest difference between me
and Kanbaru was that I knew Oshino, who helped me combat the
kaii that I ran into.

So, I couldn't help but think.

What if, Kanbaru had known Oshino, no, not necessarily knowing
Oshino, if she just had some way of helping Senjougahara, or knew
someone who could, and she solved Senjougahara's problem one
year ago. Would Kanbaru be in the position that I'm in now? Apart
from differences in age and gender though...

I guess it was all just a coincidence.

Fate, or just pure chance.

"I'm happy that you're looking out for my feelings, but don't say
things like that, Araragi-senpai. Senjougahara-senpai's not that kind
of person. She wouldn't confuse being in someone's debt with being
in love. You saving her was just what brought you two together."

There was a slight loneliness in Kanbaru's tone.

"And that's exactly why I regret my choices. When Senjougahara-

senpai rejected me, I pulled away. But you chased after her. If there
really is a difference between us, it's not between a vampire and a
monkey, or who knew Oshino and who didn't, I think it would be
that."

"Definitely."

Kanbaru muttered.

Talking with her like this, I realized that she does have quite the
introspective side. A personality completely different from her
lively sporty girl image. But if that's simply guilt, I feel like I have
something like that too.

I wonder what it is.

This feeling like a needle stabbing my heart, like guilt. And even
though she didn't need to, Kanbaru ended up saying something else
to follow up.

And I felt even more guilty.

"I really am happy that Senjougahara-senpai's problems were

solved. It might be weird for me to thank you, but I really do want
to, from the bottom of my heart."

"Honestly I didn't even do much, it was Oshino. No, I don't think

that's right either. Senjoughara saved herself. She saved herself, all
by herself."

That's just how it was.

There was only so much that I or Oshino could have done.

Without a doubt, that was all there was to it.

"I... I guess so. But, let me ask you one thing, Araragi-senpai."

"Sure, what?"

"I think I know why Senjougahara-senpai fell for you. I was so

jealous and disappointed, and to be honest, I felt like you two didn't
make a good couple, but I think I know now. But I wonder, Araragi-
senpai, what part of Senjougahara-senpai did you fall in love with?
You spent two years as classmates and never even spoke to each
other." It's a bit hard answering such a direct question. Also I'm a
little embarrassed but more than that, I'm not sure that there is a
clear answer or reason. It's just, that day, on Mother's Day at that
park...

Ahh, I see.

That makes sense.

That's what my guilt really was.

"... Why do you want to know? Kanbaru."

"It's just that, if you're only after Senjougahara-senpai's body, I think

that I could take her place."

"..."

One hell of an offer.

Kanbaru grasped her chest with her right arm and her bandaged
left arm and came up close to me. In her school uniform, Kanbaru
gave off a strangely alluring air of indiscretion. A rather seductive
pose.
"I think that I'm pretty cute."

She called herself that.

"I think that I'll look more girlish if I grow my hair out, and I have a
pretty good complexion. I've been playing sports for a long time so I
have a slim waist. My whole body is pretty slim. People have
complemented me on my body too."

"Bring me whoever said that. I'll kill him."

"It was an adviser from a club."

"This whole world is already beyond saving!"

"I can't die yet. I won't be able to go to tournaments then."

Then Kanbaru asked me "So are you up for it?" again.

Appearing neither flat out joking or half joking and half serious,
Kanbaru stubbornly pressed me for an answer with a look of
complete seriousness on her face.

"I'm being serious, Araragi-senpai. If you want, I'll be the bottom to

your top any time you want."

"Top? Bottom!? Why would I want that!?"

"Oh, I see. You don't know about BL? That's surprising."

"I don't want to talk about BL with a younger girl!"

"BL stands for Boy's Love you know."

"I knew that! That's not what I'm misunderstanding!"

Ahh, I already noticed.

When I was cleaning up Kanbaru's room, there were tons of books

with covers that seemed like that sort of thing in lying around!

I didn't want to bring it up!

I was just going to pretend that I didn't see them!

"So you really didn't misunderstood anything? I thought for sure

that you did from what you said. So, Araragi-senpai, what are you
angry about then? I don't think that I've said anything to upset your
mood have I? Or, are you actually into being on the bottom
instead?"

"We're not talking about this anymore!"

"I only like being on the bottom, so I can't be on top."

"Hmm... What? I'm not sure I get what you're saying now."

Bottom?

I feel like this conversation is going into dangerous territory.

On thin ice.

"Besides, Kanbaru, why would a man and a woman have to do stuff

from BL anyway? There's no need."

"Actually, Araragi-senpai. Have I ever told you that I want to give

my virginity to Senjou"

"I don't want to hear this!"

That thin ice is already cracked and now we're drowning
underwater.

Senjougahara Hitagi and Kanbaru Suruga, are the two of them

trying to team up and destroy every last one of my dreams about
women?

I'm sure about it, my crisis management sense is telling me, you two
were just old acquaintances and knew each other from school!

I sigh, feeling all my happiness drain out of my body and escape at

full speed.

Seriously... talking about whether I'm only after Senjougahara's

body or how all the boys love her flexible body, the conversations
she brings up are always about suggestive make me feel like my
mind and my body are being shaved into pieces. Hachikuji's a
"precocious child" in her own right, but the conversation we had
yesterday was actually pretty innocent and fun. And so I reminisced
about my conversation with an elementary school kid.

I guess it's already the end for me isn't it.

"I'm afraid that I'm going to have to be rather forward with you,
Araragi-senpai. You won't be able to survive in society if you can't
even enjoy having dirty conversations with younger girls. You
should throw away your delusions about how women actually are."

"That's exactly the kind of thing that I don't want a younger girl to
convince me of."

And I don't really like her using the word "dirty".

Not that there's any other good way to put it though.

"Whatever you say, Araragi-senpai, but if you cling on to such
cheap fantasies about women like pure maidenhood, no one's even
going to say hi to you. This is just how it is. Even girls like to talk
dirty."

That just brings up a whole other set of fantasies... But I think in her
case and Senjougahara's, it's a bit different.

"Well then, let's get back to our discussion of whether you prefer
briefs or trunks, Araragi-senpai?"

"We weren't even talking about that to begin with!"

"So were we talking about whether I'm wearing panties under my

bike shorts?"

"Kanbaru-san, are you not!?"

I was so shocked I suddenly got really polite.

"S... So, are you saying, under those bike shorts sticking out from
your skirt, you're..."

"Even if I wasn't, it's nothing to be surprised about. Bike shorts have

always been a type of underwear anyway."

"Then that's even worse! That means you're constantly showing off
your underwear!"

But when you're running or jumping, your skirt getting blown up is

at the mercy of the wind.

"Well you could put it that way, but I prefer to think of it as a stylish
gift from a sporty girl."
"Wrong! That's just perverted exhibitionism!"

"Right, now I remember, we weren't even talking about that. We

were talking about whether I could replace Senjougahara-senpai..."

"Wait, don't change the topic before we get to the bottom of this!
Tell me whether you're really wearing any or not!"

"Why don't we just leave out those vulgar details, Araragi-senpai.

It's nothing important anyway."

"Of course it's important! This is the difference between my kouhai

being a sporty girl or an exhibitionist!"

And so our not only dirty, but completely pointless conversation

continued.

"I suppose so... Why don't I put it this way, I'm both a sporty girl
and an exhibitionist. A sporty girl to those who think of me as a
sporty girl, and an exhibitionist to those who think of me as an
exhibitionist."

"Stop playing with words! Saying "I'm X to those who think of me

as X and Y to those who think of me as Y" is only cool while you're
in junior high! What are you, my little sister?!"

This conversation was as pointless as it could get.

There's no way it could get even more pointless.

"But seriously, Kanbaru. No matter how hard to try, you'll never be

able to replace Senjougahara."

"..."
You'll never be able to replace Senjougahara.

That's not all I meant to say.

"You're not Senjougahara in the first place. No one can really

replace someone else. And no one can become someone else.
Senjougahara Hitagi is Senjougahara Hitagi, and Kanbaru Suruga is
Kanbaru Suruga. No matter how much you love them, no matter
how much you look up to them, no matter how much..."

"You're right."

After a period of silence, Kanbaru nodded.

"You're right, Araragi-senpai."

"Alright, stop wasting our time chatting and let's go. And get out of
that pose, it looks like I've been talking with a high school girl who's
just been holding her own chest. You think that sort of surreal scene
could exist?"

"Hm. I didn't notice that."

"You should've noticed that sooner."

There are so many things that you should've noticed sooner.

"If we don't hurry up the sun's going to set. Your left hand get's bad
at night right."

"Well on the other hand, as long as the sun's out, there's no

problem. At the very least, we'll be fine for a couple more hours."

"Wow... only active at night. Really reminds me of vampires..."

We walked along the wire mesh fence surrounding he building
until we arrived at a large hole in the fence. The same one that
Senjougahara and I had entered through three weeks ago.

This time it was with Kanbaru though.

I thought that we had nothing to do with each other, but it seems

like fate disagrees.

Whatever that was about all coincidences being fate.

"Watch out for you feet."

"Thanks for the concern."

Kanbaru advanced while trying to push away some of the

rampantly growing grass as if to clear a path, but at this rate I
wondered what would even happen to this building by the
summertime. The building appeared to be on the edge of
destruction, or even already destroyed. And so we entered the
building.

Things were scattered all around.

Pieces of concrete, empty cans, signs, broken glass, I couldn't tell

what some of the stuff that was scattered around even was. It was
just all scattered around. The building obviously had no electricity,
and the already dark and gloomy building looked like it had
decayed into ruins even more than usual in the setting evening sun.
Why doesn't Oshino try to clean up at least the interior of the
building since he's got so much free time. Isn't it depressing living
in this sort of place.

Still a bit better than Kanbaru's room though...

Senjougahara seemed uncomfortable at the building's condition and
Oshino's indulgent neglect, but it seemed Kanbaru had no problems
with it at all.

"It's so dirty, I can't say that I approve. If he's going to live here,
why doesn't this Oshino guy clean up the place."

"..."

She really is strict on people in strange places.

Or does she really have no idea about her own condition... I thought
that she was just that bold because she had a lot of self confidence,
but she really can be strinct.

That part of her was completely different from Senjougahara.

She's way too self conscious.

Oshino mainly stayed on the fourth floor.

I walked along in the dim light.

It became darker the further away from the entrance we went. I've
already come here so many times, how could I have forgotten to
bring a flashlight. I had the envelope Senjougahara gave me with
the hundred thousand yen inside, so clearly I had intended to come
here no matter what ended up happening with Kanbaru so I really
should have remembered.

Depending on the time and place, I'm fine even in the dark, so I
guess I just got used to it and completely forgot about it over time.

The remaining traces of when I was a vampire.

"..."

When I reached the base of the stairs, I turned around to see

Kanbaru timidly walking behind me, almost like she was
lightheaded. She didn't seem to be doing well because of the dark.
Despite how firm on her feet she usually was being such a sporty
girl, her steps seemed filled with uneasiness and almost hopeless. It
seemed cruel to make her climb the stairs with her like this now.
With her left hand already like it was, what would happen if she
hurt one of her legs... When I came with Senjougahara we held
hands going up though...

That was the first time Senjougahara and I held hands. Hmm...
Kanbaru turned down my offer to ride on the back of my bike, was
it because she was thinking about this? I experienced first hand how
serious Senjougahara's standards about cheating were yesterday
so...

"Hey, Kanbaru-kouhai."

"What is it, Araragi-senpai?"

"Stick out your right hand."

"Like this?"

"Ok, combine."

I pulled her hand and had her hold on to the belt holding up my
school slacks.

"There are stairs here, so we're going to go up slowly so you don't

fall. Watch out."
"..."

There's no that this sort of physical contact could count as cheating

by Senjougahara's standards, my plan was perfect. This was really
just playing with the definitions, but at least now I had an excuse to
tell Senjougahara.

"You're a nice guy you know, Araragi-senpai."

Kanbaru said, while tightly holding on to and pulling the belt as if

to test its strength.

"Don't people ever tell you that? That you're a nice guy and a great
person."

"I wouldn't really want people complementing me with those sort of

vague compliments like they're trying to make up for my lack of
individuality."

"I'm really grateful that you worry so much about my relationship

with Senjougahara-senpai even when it comes to just leading me
along in the dark. So this is what people mean when they talk about
people being so nice it's annoying."

"... You said that out loud you know."

Still, she sure is sharp.

Normally people wouldn't have figured that out.

But even if you figured it out, seriously, don't say it. That's just
embarrassing. The more she acts all goofy, the more I can't stand
being around her."
"Can I ask you something, Araragi-senpai?"

"Sure, anything except for top or bottom stuff."

"Ahh, I guess we'll save the stuff about top and bottom for later."

"Is that what you wanted to ask me about!?"

"Also about my panties and whether I'm an exhibitionist."

"Don't try to bring that conversation back!"

"Honestly, there's nothing I want to talk about except perverted

stuff."

"As if there are actually people like that! Hurry up and tell me what
you were going to ask me about."

"Judging from our conversations up until now, it seems like you

haven't told Senjougahara-senpai anything about me."

"What? I talked to her about it. That's how I found out about you
and her being the Valhalla Combo and all."

Technically I found out about the term "Valhalla Combo" from

Hanekawa, but I wouldn't have understood the relationship
between them without having confirmed with Senjougahara
anyway. Even if I could have made a guess, I would've never had a
chance. And I didn't even think to ask Hanekawa.

"That's not what I meant. My right hand. About my right hand

attacking you..."
"Oh, that. I haven't really had the time to talk to her about that and...
Well yesterday night wasn't really a good time. And I didn't really
know the whole truth then. I didn't know what your right hand was
like. I wasn't even entirely sure that you were the one who attacked
me. It really was just a guess. Right now she just thinks that I hit a
telephone pole on my bike."

"But the area around got destroyed so badly. Were you really ok?"

"Well that's one of the perks of being a former vampire, and I

couldn't really go to the police or a hospital. It'd be bad for me too if
I went public. Of course I know I can't Senjougahara in the dark
about you forever... But I think you should be the one to tell her, not
me."

"It's not that I'm being a really nice guy, or a great person. It's just
that, after telling me everything."

Your unfair way of looking at things.

Your black-hearted reluctance and attachment.

I could never...

"... Woops."

In the landing between the third and fourth floors, was Shinobu.

Oshino Shinobu.

Looking about eight years old with skin so white it seemed almost
transparent and wearing a helmet and goggles. A young blonde
haired girl sat on the landing holding her knees to her chest. She
was childlike, like a zashiki-warashi guarding a house, except for
her blonde hair.

I was surprised seeing her sitting there and let out a little sound.

Shinobu just sat completely still on the landing staring at Kanbaru

and I as we climbed the stairs. There was a complex look in her
eyes; bitter, unsparing, as if she had some complaint, or she was
unsatisfied with something.

"..."

I ignored her.

I headed for the fourth floor looking away from her and tried to
avoid any sort of contact with her. I couldn't think of anything else
to do in that situation... But why was she on this landing anyway?
Did she have a fight with Oshino?

"Hey, hey! Araragi-senpai. Who's that girl?"

Kanbaru asked as we reached the fourth floor in a rather frivolous

tone having lost her cool composure from before. I guess it would
be more unreasonable to tell her to just ignore a young girl sitting in
an abandoned building without any explanation... Part of Kanbaru's
body had become a kaii, could she sense anything from Shinobu?

"That girl was so cute!"

"Why is that the happiest I've seen you today!?"

"I want to hug her... No, I want her to hug me!"

"You sure are fickle."

Didn't you say you could have died for Senjougara?

And she's sitll a kid...

"Could you just keep those thoughts to yourself..."

"I don't want to keep any secrets from you, Araragi-senpai."

"You're way too revealing with this stuff."

"Revealing?"

"Don't get excited just because I said 'revealing'! Can't I just use a
word with more than one meaning!?"

I guess she doesn't discriminate, or she's not just yuri for

Senjougahara. It's like she's trying to carpet bomb all my fantasies
about everything, not just women, into oblivion. I silently promised
that I would never introduce Hachikuji to her then told my dark
feelings to Kanbaru.

The mere shadow of...

A vampire.

The remains of...

A vampire.

That was that blonde haired girl, Oshino Shinobu.

We could relax while that was all she was...

"Hmm. I see... That's too bad."

"Now I've seen the saddest you've looked today. And by the way,
we're here Kanbaru. Now the question is whether Oshino is here.
We can't exactly just call it a day and come back tomorrow if he's
not here. My life's on the line here."

"... Sorry about that."

"I wasn't trying to be bitter. Don't worry about it."

"Still, my conscience won't let me leave it at that. You have to let me

do something to make it up to you. I got it, Araragi-senpai, what's
your favorite color?"

"What, my favorite color? Are you going to give me something?

Nothing in particular but, if I had to say it's blue."

"Blue. Got it."

Kanbaru nodded.

"So, I promise that when I meet you, I'll try to wear blue underwear
to the best of my ability."

"Don't involve me in your perverted fantasies! You're making it

seem like it's my fault now. You're just frustrated!"

On the fourth floor, out of the three classrooms, all of their doors
were broken. If he really is here, Oshino would be inside one of
these three classrooms.

The first one was empty.

And inside the second one, was Oshino.

"What took you so long, Araragi-kun. I got so bored waiting for you
I almost fell asleep just now."

Those were Oshino Meme's first words as he lay on a sheet of

cardboard whose color had changed like it had rotten, spread across
a linoleum floor covered all over in cracks. The cracks presented
such as danger that tripping wasn't even the main concern, you'd
probably cut yourself pretty deeply on the soles of your feet if you
walked barefoot on it. As always, he seemed completely
unconcerned and uninterested in his surroundings and his first
words gave the impression he already understood everything.

His psychedelic aloha shirt was covered in wrinkles, and his hair
was unkempt, all together his appearance was unclean. The very
words 'cleanliness' and 'freshness' were probably words from a
completely different dimension to his man. One could say that his
appearance fit the inside of this abandoned building perfectly, but
then I couldn't even start to imagine what Oshino looked like before
he started living here.

Oshino hung his head as if incredibly bored.

I noticed Kanbaru was hiding herself behind me and still holding

on to my belt although we had already arrived, either out of anxiety
or out of caution after seeing Oshino who looked rather suspicious.

"What's this, Araragi-kun, you brought a different girl today again.

Every time I meet you you're always with a different girl. You have
my congratulations."

"Shut up. Stop using the same line."

"It was the same situation so of course I would use the same line. I
don't have that many lines in the first place. And another girl with
straight bangs. Looking at the uniform, she's in your grade right?
Your school has rules on what kinds of hairstyles are allowed?
That's quite old fashioned isn't it. Interesting."

"As if we have those sorts of rules."

It's just a coincidence.

Apart from the difference in length, Kanbaru's hairstyle probably

looks the same as Senjougahara's because she was trying to copy
her. I'm not really sure about why Senjougahara keeps her hair the
way she does, but from what Hanekawa said, it's to look serious. Or
something like that.

"So I guess this is your type, Araragi-kun. When I get a chance, I'll
cut Shinobu-chan's hair like that too. She's just been letting her hair
grow so it's a good time to get a haircut anyway. Next time why
don't you bring along a girl with a bob cut. Might be a bit tough, but
I'll just put it out there."

"I saw Shinobu out on the stairwell. What's she doing there?"

"She got mad when I ate one of the donuts I got her for a snack from
Mister Donuts. She's been like that since yesterday."

"..."

What kind of vampire is she?

And what kind of old man are you?

"I tried to be nice and gave her the Pao de Ring donut but, she really
does hold a grudge. I should teach her the phrase 'Quality over
quantity.'"
"Who cares... Seriously, who cares. Anyway Oshino, there's one
thing I have to correct you on. She's not in my grade. Look, her
skirt's a different color than Senjougahara and Hanekawa. She's one
year below them. Her name's Kanbaru Suruga. Kan from 'god' and
baru from 'fields'. The 'Suruga' part is..."

Uh.

I know the kanji but it's a bit hard to explain...

I guess I'm just bad at Japanese.

"Suruga from 'Suruga questioning."

Kanbaru helped me out.

Thank goodness... But what's Suruga questioning anyway?

I don't know the word, but it sounds like some famous test. Maybe
something mysterious like the Sphinx's riddle.

"Ahh, Suruga questioning. I see."

Oshino nodded, having understood what Suruga meant.

Dammit, if Oshino didn't know, I could have just waited for Suruga
to explain it to him and listened... I was a little annoyed at not
knowing so I asked Kanbaru 'What's Suruga questioning?'"

"It's a well known torture method from the Edo period. They would
tie a person's arms and legs behind their back, hang then from the
ceiling, then place a heavy rock on their back and spin them
around."
"Don't explain your own name like a torture method!"

"It's a type of torture that I've always wanted to have done to me."

".........!"

First yuri, then boy's love, then being on the bottom, then lolis, now
masochism!? How much shit is she in to?

It appears out school's star was already morally bankrupt, even

without all the rumours going around about her.

I lost my words.

"Anyway, it's Kanbaru Suruga."

The conversation seemed to have eased the nervous atmosphere

and Kanbaru let go of my belt and showed the half of her body that
she was hiding behind me to Oshino. And in her usual dignified
tone filled with confidence and without a speck of doubt, placed her
right hand in front of her chest and introduced herself.

"I'm Araragi-senpai's kouhai. Nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you too. I'm Oshino Meme, young lady."

In response to Kanbaru's bright smile, Oshino simply smirked.

Smiling and smirking, the words are so similar, but the impression I
got from them was completely different. More like complete
opposites. I guess a smile isn't just as simple as a smile. Oshino has
his own rather invigorating way of smiling but Kanbaru's seemed
too invigorating and actually ended up being unpleasant. In
Oshino's case, it looked fake, like a model.
"... Hmm, you're Araragi-kun's kouhai, so that means you're also
tsundere-chan's kouhai right?" said Oshino, as if looking at
Kanbaru's back, with his gaze far in the distance and out of focus; in
a way that seemed as though he as alluding to something other than
the obvious fact that Senjougahara and I were both third years so
Kanbaru would also be Senjougahara's kouhai.

Or it might just be my imagination.

"Oshino, first off, I have something for you. It's from your tsundere-
chan, Senjougahara."

"Hmm? What's with that envelope. Ahh, the money. Money,

money, money. Great. I was just getting a little tight with money. I
can make it to the rainy season with this. I thought that I would just
have to wait for the rain to drink something."

"Don't tell your unpleasant stories to sensitive kids."

I see the sort of situation they were in, fighting over donuts. I can
see why Shinobu would get mad. Even as a vampire, she was of
noble birth. And now she's living in this abandoned building with a
dirty middle aged man. She really has fallen pretty far... I'm not sure
how I feel being one of the reasons she's living like this now.

Oshino checked the contents of the envelope.

"Ok, 100 thousand yen. Now there's nothing between me and

tsundere-chan. Going through you instead of coming to give it
herself, I must have grown on her. Seems like tsundere-chan gets
how things work around here."

"What? Isn't that the opposite? Wouldn't it seem more she's more
grateful, or more sincere if-"
"That's the same whether she shows me or not. Anyway, i don't
intend to debate this with you Araragi-kun, we'd just be going back
and forth. Alright then, what's with the young lady over there." said
Oshino, stuffing the envelope into the pocket of his aloha shirt
(crumpling the nice new bills) and tilted his chin up at Kanbaru.

"You didn't just bring her to here to introduce me to your cute

kouhai right? Or did you just bring her to show off? If that's how it
is, that would mean I really underestimated you as a man, Araragi-
kun... Haha, that's pretty hard to imagine though. So that means...
Hmm, got it, those bandages right? Hehe..."

"Oshino-san. I-"

Kanbaru started talking but Oshino just waved his hand slowly as if
to get a hold of the conversation.

"Let's start from the beginning. Doesn't seem like a very pleasant
story. The ones about arms never are, at least for me. Particularly
that left arm it seems."

007

As I was cleaning up Kanbaru Suruga's room, among the crushed

soft drink cans and candy wrappers and instant noodle cups, there
was one thing that seemed strange and out of place. It was a thin
and long wooden box. It looked quite aged from its color, and
probably because of Kanbaru's rough way of handling things, it was
scratched and nicked all over. Despite that, it was a bulky and
sturdy looking box. I thought that there was probably some antique,
like an old flower vase inside. Considering the grandeur of
Kanbaru's Japanese manor, I wouldn't be at all surprised if an article
of matching grandeur were inside the box.
However.

The box was empty.

Of course, just because it was empty, I couldn't throw it in with the

trash, so for the time being I piled it up on top of a cardboard box.
However, as we approach the real question at hand, Kanbaru
reached out her hand to the box and solemnly placed it between us.
She then asked me what I thought was inside the box. I told her
what I thought was in the box, some flower vase or something.

"Even you make mistakes sometimes, don't you Araragi-senpai...

This may be slightly impolite, but I'm actually quite relieved. I feel
saved. I feel like I could you the humanity in you for a brief
moment."

"... So, what's actually in the box?"

"A mummy." Kanbaru immediately answered.

"Inside that box... there's the left hand of a mummy."

"......"

The mummy of a left hand inside that wooden box.

The first time that Kanbaru had used it was when she was in
elementary school, so she said. Eight years ago. Apparently back
when she was only in third grade, her mother entrusted her with
this box.

That was also the last time she would see her mother.
A few days after receiving the box, almost as if she had foreseen
what would happen and gave her the box beforehand, Kanbaru's
parents both died in a traffic accident. While Kanbaru was in school
during math class, her parents died instantly in a massive pileup on
highway far away. Apparently the car caught fire and the bodies
were barely recognizable.

Kanbaru was taken in by her grandparents on her father's side.

Taken in to live in this Japanese manor.

Until then she lived with her parents in an apartment, also

apparently because of her parents' elopement. Nobody had
approved of or blessed their marriage. A father from a family of
long tradition and history, and a mother from a family with
absolutely nothing to do with those things... Her story made me
wonder if these sorts of things still happen nowadays. Of course, it's
not even particularly uncommon, replied Kanbaru.

"My mother had it quite tough. My father, it seems like he was

trying to sail against the tide. But it didn't work out. They were
essentially alienated by their families. Actually, until my parents'
funeral, I had never even met my grandparents. I didn't even know
their names, and they didn't know mine. The first thing they asked
me, was my name."

"Hmm..."

Flooding on top and burning on the bottom.

Don't worry about my parents.

As if I could.
Given that there was discord between Kanbaru's grandparents and
her mother, Kanbaru was still their son's daughter, in other words,
their granddaughter. Of course they would take her in. And so
Kanbaru left the place where she had lived until then and of course,
transferred out of the elementary school she had been going to.

She couldn't get used to it.

"Probably because I spoke differently. I speak like this now but, it

seems like my parents tried to pick a place as far away from this
house as possible, it was somewhere in the southern part of
Kyushu, so the dialect was pretty different. I didn't quite get bullied
but, they played pranks on me and I couldn't make any friends."

"So... the elementary school you went to was different from the one
Senjougahara went to right?"

"Right. I only met Senjougahara in junior high."

"I see."

Well, looking at it geographically, I suppose it would be like that.

It was probably also different from Hanekawa's elementary school.

"Looking back at it now, it's now like I wasn't guilty at all of causing
some disharmony in my new surroundings. It seems obvious but,
my parents' death really did affect me. So I closed off my heart. But
it's not like I could just tell everyone around me to treat me nicely
just because I had closed off my heart. But, this is also something I
can only talk about now. At the time, I was just trapped by my
feelings about my parents' death. But I also couldn't lose myself in
my memories of my parents. I couldn't indulge in my memories.
My grandfather and grandmother disposed of all of my parents'
belongings, they didn't leave a single thing. They probably wanted
to raise me so that I would have nothing to do with my parents at
all."

"Thanks but no thanks." added Kanbaru.

"My grandfather and grandmother are both great people, I respect

them and I'm really grateful to them for raising me. Their
relationship with my parents has nothing to do with me."

Really.

It seems a bit too long to have been just some discord. And now all
that was left to Kanbaru of her parents' were her memories, and that
wooden box entrusted to her by her mother.

Despite the solemness and seriousness of the box, Kanbaru had

never been told not to open it. So she did. And inside was the left
hand of a mummy.

However, it seems that when she opened it, the hand only went up
to the wrist. Inside the box along with the mummy, there was a
letter from her mother. Really, it wasn't long enough to call a letter,
more like an instruction manual on how to use the left hand.

Explaining that it was a tool that granted wishes.

That it could grant any wish.

Any three.

At the time, Kanbaru had just gone up a grade and become a fourth
grader, nine or ten years old. Regardless of her exact age, she was at
a strange age where one just might or might not believe such
strange story. An age where she might just barely believe it or just
barely not believe it. About the age where half the kids believe in
Santa Claus and half don't, right? Or maybe that was just a fantasy
looking at it from my generation... at least I don't think I believed in
Santa Claus when I was in fourth grade. I might have believed in
Doraemon's secret gadgets though.

Kanbaru was right on the half way borderline.

In other words, in half belief and half doubt, with around the
confidence to test some magic charm published in a magazine, not
taking it very seriously, Kanbaru told her "wish" to mummy.

The contents of her first wish weren't really important.

After all, it was just like testing some charm in a magazine.

It was just to test it out.

"If my first wish gets granted, I know what I'll wish for in my
second wish." said Kanbaru.

It goes without saying.

Her second wish was regarding her parents.

Regarding her parents' life.

"I want to be able to run quickly."

Kanbaru, in fourth grade at the time, wished to the mummy.

Apparently Kanbaru was also known for how slowly she ran...
Apart from her accent, that was another reason she was made fun
of. Thinking about it as a high schooler, it's as stupid as a reason as
having an accent, but even if it weren't, wanting to be able to run
quickly would be a serious, pressing concern to an elementary
school kid. Around that time, it just so happened that there was a
small athletic meet at the school Kanbaru was going to. It seems she
wished to the mummy thinking that if she got first place in the race,
everyone would see her in a different light.

"At the time, I was absolutely horrible at athletics. I was 'slow' or

maybe 'dull'. I would trip even when I walked."

"Hmm.. But now,"

She's the ace of the basketball team.

A star.

"... Wait, does that mean,"

"I wish it turned out like that."

"In fact," Kanbaru started.

"That night, I had a dream. A dream where kids were being

attacked by a monster in a raincoat. I dreamt that a kid all wrapped
up in his futon was mercilessly attacked by a monster's left hand."

"......"

"I'm sure you already know how this story ends, having such a
good intuition. Right Araragi-senpai? The next day, when I woke
up and went to school, four students were absent. All four of them
were the kids I was going to race against in the athletic meet."

The monkey's paw.

Apparently, it granted its owner's wishes.

But apparently, in a way its owner didn't intend.

"I was horrified. In a panic, I investigated the true nature of the

mummy at the library. Right away, I found The Monkey's Paw by
Jacobs. I shivered at how terrifying it was... If I had also told my
second wish to the hand, what would have happened I wondered.
Actually, those four students could have died depending on the
situation... Luckily nothing major happened to them, but it easily
could have."

Kanbaru returned the mummy to the box, sealed even more

solemnly than before it was opened and placed it into the very back
of her closet. Both the second wish and the third wish were
preposterous. She wanted to look away from everything. She
wanted to forget about everything.

But.

She couldn't.

However much she wanted to forget, there was no way she could.
There was still some time before the athletic meet. So, on the day
after that, Kanbaru was placed into another group during class.

This time there were five people.

She would be running, with another five people.

"What do you think I did?"

"......"
"What do you think I should have done?"

Obviously, doing nothing at all, the results would have been clear
as day. The same thing would happen. The same thing would
repeat. So, the normal thing to do would be to wish to the mummy.
All she could do was wish to the mummy to cancel her first wish.
But, she was afraid to do that. Having already investigated into the
mummy, Kanbaru was afraid to do that. The hand granted its
owner's wishes in a way its owner didn't intend. There was no way
of knowing in what twisted way her second wish would be granted.

So, Kanbaru ran.

She ran and ran and ran.

She was slow.

So she put in the effort so she could be fast.

"All I could do was grant my wish by myself. That way, the

mummy would have no reason to attack those students. Luckily, as
soon as I started, I got the ropes of it. There was no physical reason
that I was slow like being heavy or having hurt my legs. Even if I
couldn't train my reflexes right away, I could dash. I got first place
in the meet. That way I started making some friends in my class. It
did take a little time though, obviously."

And so, having succeeded in granting her wish with her own effort,
Kanbaru never slacked off even after the meet. It might be a bit rude
to say that she had some innate talent, but her dedication eventually
bloomed and bore fruit. So much so that as soon as she entered sixth
grade, she got an offer from her junior high's track team.

Going tap tap tap.

But, Kanbaru couldn't enter join the track team. She couldn't place
herself in a place where there could be people faster than her. She
didn't know how far the mummy's effects would extend. It might
have already been over as soon as she got first place in the athletic
meet. Or, it might stay with her for her entire life. There was no way
to check. There was no way she couldn't have been afraid of the
latter possibility.

From Kanbaru's perspective.

She had already figured out that she wasn't suited to long distance
running. Not just on the level of her marathon's in elementary
school, she already couldn't keep up during junior high. Even if by
a little bit, if there was anyone faster than her, she'd have to start
everything over again. It would all be over. That's probably why
Kanbaru joined the basketball club in junior high. There was no one
who could keep up with Kanbaru on a field divided into and
limited to a court.

"There was also the option of not joining any clubs at all, but it
wasn't just that I couldn't let my body get weak just in case,
excercise had become a place to lean on for me. If I wasn't doing
anything, I felt like I was being crushed. You might call me a sporty
girl, but I'm not as great as that. I was just driven by fear.

However.

It seems like she enjoyed basketball.

She started liking it.

That was because, she was finally able to use her legs, which had
just been a place for her to lean on, to walk forward, positively. She
was able to use her feet which had just been a means to run away
from the mummy with, as a means for something else, or rather as a
goal.

Besides that.

By becoming the ace of her team.

She was able to Senjougahara Hitagi.

"Senjougahara-senpai was the ace of the track team, so she came to

see me after she heard my reputation of being fast. She might have
already forgotten, even if she does still remember, she probably
doesn't care anymore, but at the beginning, it was Senjougahara-
senpai who approached me first.

"He..."

That was a little, surprising.

Not for the current Senjougahara, but even for Senjougahara back in
junior high, that was a little surprising.

"She challenged me to an unofficial hundred meter race. It was

really tough, having to turn her down. She was such an amazing
senpai. I didn't fall for her at first sight, but I had already fallen for
her three days after we started talking. I started thinking that I
wanted to be beside her. I was healed by Senjougahara-senpai."

Healed.

That word is as distant from Senjougahara now as Pluto is from the

Sun, but it seems after meeting Senjougahara, Kanbaru really was
able to stop thinking about the mummy entrusted to her by her
mother, about the wooden box shoved into her closet.
She was able to forget.

She was able to forget what she had always wanted to.

However.

"But really, it was still there deep in my consciousness, remaining

there unconsciously. After that, I still sporadically felt the urge to
use the mummy several times. I felt the urge to rely on the mummy.
Like when we were facing off against a good team in basketball.
Like when I had an awful fight with my friend. Like when I tried to
get into Naoetsu Private High School to be with Senjougahara-
senpai... Like when Senjougahara-senpai rejected me."

She held herself back through all of it.

She did something about it by herself.

Of maybe, she just gave up on everything.

At that time, Kanbaru understood the reason her mother had

entrusted her with that wooden box. It was because her mother had
wanted her to become the sort of person who could solve her
problems by herself when she had to. She had wanted to teach
Kanbaru not the lesson from The Monkey's Paw; that you should just
accept fate, but that if you're going to change fate, you should be
able to do it by yourself. Her mother had been taught from her
mother, and her mother's mother from her mother, and her mother's
mother's mother from her mother, passing through the generations,
that fate was something to be changed by your own hands, and
wishes were something to be granted with your own hands. That
was passed down through the generations. So, being able to run
fast, or being smart, those were both things that she gained by
herself.
She wasn't born with these things.

They lay at the end of a path of blood, sweat and tears.

And she always remembers that.

That's why.

If Kanbaru had wished to the mummy, she might have been able to
solve the secret, the problem that Senjougahara held, but she didn't.

She stayed silent.

And pulled away by herself.

She gave up on even being beside Senjougahara.

She squeezed her hands and bit her lips, and gave up.

I could die for Senjougahara.

She had said that clearly. Kanbaru Suruga had.

All for Senjougahara's sake, Kanbaru killed herself.

She let her own wishes die.

She forgot the things she didn't want to.

And the things that she couldn't.

"But a year after that, I found out about you, Araragi-senpai. I found
out about you, Araragi-senpai. I saw you, Araragi-senpai, beside
Senjougahara-senpai."
She couldn't hold herself back.

She couldn't do something about it.

She couldn't give up.

When exactly she opened her closet, when exactly she took out that
wooden box, when exactly she opened that envelope, when exactly
she made a wish to the mummy, Kanbaru no longer knew. Kanbaru
thought nothing of why the hand of the mummy which was only
supposed to have been up to the left wrist, now extended up to
the elbow. And when she finally noticed.

Kanbaru's left hand had become a kaii.

Her arm, had become that of a beast.

For the first time in seven years, Kanbaru was horrified.

Apparently.

"... So that's when you started stalking me... Now that I think about
it, every time we met, you'd always ask me if anything had
happened or not."

So that's what she meant.

It wasn't just some casual talk.

She wasn't trying to find anything out about Senjougahara. That

hand that she could no longer play her beloved basketball with,
even with that hand that she would never wanted anyone to see,
she went as far as to hide it with a bandage to make sure I was safe.
She was that concerned for me.
But, on the fourth day after she started stalking me.

The night of the fourth day.

Something happened.

Apparently Kanbaru had a dream.

A dream where a monster wearing a raincoat attacked me.

And so, today, when I entered the Year-2 Class-2 classroom,

Kanbaru seemed so relaxed.

She understood everything.

What had happened.

She thought that something quite different from what I thought had
happened. She understood that kaii were involved, but she wasn't
aware of what phenomena were occurring... She wasn't aware of the
fact that it was the mummy's doing.

Apparently, the monkey's paw granted its owner's wishes.

But apparently, in a way its owner didn't intend.

The mummy thought that in order for Kanbaru to be able to be

beside Senjougahara, eliminating the person currently going out
with Senjougahara, Araragi Koyomi, would be the quickest method.

Most likely.

Fearing that Kanbaru began stalking me.

However, Kanbaru's prediction was spot on.

In reality, if I wasn't wasn't me, if Araragi Koyomi wasn't Araragi
Koyomi, if I wasn't a former immortal vampire, I would definitely
have been killed. I wouldn't have been able to dodge the first or the
second attacks, and even if I could have, the third one would have
been fatal. That was how ridiculous the hand's destructive power,
it's destructive capabilities were. By conjecture, when Kanbaru was
in elementary school, the only reason the victims weren't hurt too
badly was because at that time in fourth grade, Kanbaru was still
devoid of athletic capabilities. The polar opposite of Kanbaru now.
Ironically, the very body she had trained in order to avoid the
effects of her first wish, made the effects of her second wish ever the
more horrible. She only attacked with her left hand, her lightning
speed faster than the eye could see, was Kanbaru Suruga's real
ability. The upgraded version of her ability.

Her ability, her destructive ability.

Violence.

And.

As a matter of fact, her problem's still not over. As long as I'm still
alive, it'll never end. As soon as the sun sets and it becomes night,
that monster in the raincoat will attack me. And Kanbaru will
dream of me being attacked by that monster in the raincoat.

It'll keep on repeating until I die. Over and over again.

Until her dream is fulfilled.

Until her wish is granted.

Until Kanbaru's second wish is granted.

And even though Kanbaru's wish was only that...

"'The very existence of people in this world, I find tiresome. But not
you.'"

"Hmm?'

Kanbaru opened her eyes looking like she didn't entirely

understand my quote.

"What's that?"

"Nothing really... I was just thinking about whether the person

we're about to go see will welcome us or not."

And so.

Just like that, without changing or eating lunch, I on my bike and

Kanbaru dashing, we headed to the abandoned cram school slightly
off of a residential area where Oshino Meme and Oshino Shinobu
lived.

And so, finally we arrive at the present.

The present.

On the fourth floor, Kanbaru and I faced Oshino. Even after hearing
a brief outline of the situation, Oshino showed no signs of a reaction
and simply looked up at the fluorescent lamp hanging from the
ceiling (of course, the building had no power so it was quite
literally, just hanging) while swinging the unlit cigarette he had put
in his mouth partway into Kanbaru's explanation from side to side,
all the while saying nothing. We had already said everything that
we could including everything about Senjougahara so there was
nothing left for us to do...

Still it felt, somewhat awkward.

Oshino Meme was usually so talkative one would think that he was
born from a tongue, but from time to time he would grow quiet like
this. He was truly a difficult man to deal with. It's times like these
that I think that although he looks like a really lively guy usually,
maybe he's actually a really gloomy guy.

"Your bandage."

Finally, at last Oshino spoke.

"Your bandage. Would you mind taking it off and showing me

young lady?"

"Ahh, sure."

Kanbaru shot a glance at me as if seeking help. I told Kanbaru "It's

fine." to calm her down. Hearing my words, Kanbaru started taking
off the bandage with her right hand. And then.

And then, the hand of a beast appeared.

Rolling up her sleeves, Kanbaru exposed up to her upper arm. As if

to show the joint between the arm of a beast and the arm of a
human, Kanbaru bent her elbow took a step forward and said to
Oshino "Is this ok?"

"... Sure, that's good. I see, I thought as much."

"You thought as much? What did you have in mind? Oshino. I can
never understand your attitude, you always act like this trying to
provoke us. Acting omnipotent isn't really that fun is it?"

"Get off my case man, you seem lively today, Araragi-kun, did
something good happen to you?"

Oshino spit out the cigarette which he never ended up lighting.

Actually, now that I think about it, I don't think I've ever seen
Oshino with a lit cigarette in his mouth. I turned to face that
frivolous bastard's ever snickering grin.

"Araragi-kun, and you too young lady. First off I'd like to correct
one of your misconceptions, that isn't a monkey's paw."

"What?'

All of a sudden, Oshino overturned all of our assumptions up until

now. I was surprised. Kanbaru seemed caught off guard as well.

"The monkey's paw has diverged into so many different variants

since Jacobs' time that it's impossible to tell what the real one was
like, but I don't remember anything in my admittedly limited
information about it fusing with its owner's arm. With tsundere-
chan's crab, if yours was a crab it'd be all it took for this to be a nice
classic Japanese folktale but the world doesn't always work out like
that. You did a bit of research on your own didn't you young lady?
I'm quite sure you wouldn't' have come across anything about the
monkey's paw fusing with its owner's arm. If you did though, I
guess it'd just mean that there are still big gaps in my insufficient
knowledge."

"... Well I did look into it, but that was back when I was in
elementary school."
"Thought as much. But if that's the case, why did you think that it
was a monkey's paw? I'm sure your mother definitely never talked
about it like it was. Probably because it fit the majority of the
conditions right?"

"Conditions? What do you mean by that?"

"In other words, those two "apparently"'s, Araragi-kun. Apparently,

the monkey's paw grants its owner's wishes. But apparently, in a
way its owner's didn't intend. Those two right?"

Hmm, Oshino smiled disgustingly.

He seemed like his personality was just bad, or rotten to the core.

"That must have been a convenient explanation for you, right young
lady? Or should I say that it must have felt good? Whatever, it
doesn't matter either way. But what's important is that definitely
isn't the monkey's paw. You said that it used to be a mummy right?
So it gained life by assimilating into you, right? Meaning, it should
be the Rainy Devil."

"Rainy...?"

Oshino continued the conversation saying "So, allowing me neither

the question following my reaction to the word "Rainy" as well as
any time to do so.

"Araragi-kun, have you read Faust?"

"What?"

"So I see you haven't. It seems more like you were never even aware
that it existed. I'm not even surprised. I've decided to just get used
to your reactions, Araragi-kun. So, young lady, what about you?
Have you read Faust?"

"Ahh, wait."

Kanbaru was surprised by Oshino's sudden question, however she

quickly responded "No, I'm not a very good student so I haven't
read it yet." like it was an automatic reflex.

"Of course, I know the how the story goes though."

"I see. It's enough if you know how it goes. Most high schoolers
should know at least that much. Haha, Araragi-kun, embarrassing
isn't it."

"Don't make fun of Araragi-senpai! Obviously he just happened to

not know about that one book! He's just not the type that likes
reading books in the first place!" shouted Kanbaru, suddenly raising
her voice in protest at Oshino's words.

Oshino was stunned at Kanbaru's reaction which seemed normally

impossible and looked to me apparently seeking an explanation.

I looked away.

... Kanbaru.

I'm happy that you'd get that angry for me but...

I had never thought that having someone who would get angry for
me would be so reassuring, but yelling at Oshino just makes me
seem like an idiot...
"Kanbaru... That joke's only funny the first time. It's sorta funny, but
if you do it every time Oshino takes a jab at me we'll never finish
here..."

"Hmm. I see. Those are the wise words of a man who can be
impartial with anyone, aren't they Araragi-senpai. Honestly, as a
person devoid of moral character who is easily angered, I may find
it difficult to heed your wise words, but if you say so, I shall restrain
myself and bear this offense." Kanbaru nodded and bowed her head
to Oshino.

"My deepest apologies."

At least she knew how to apologize.

What a polite kid.

"... It's fine. It was pretty fun. But really, even with your arm like
that, you sure are lively, did something good happen to you young
lady? Anyway, let's get back to Faust. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
was the representative author of the Sturm und Drang movement,
and his culminating and representative work was his play Faust.
Well about the play's story... young lady, whatever you know's fine,
could you fill Araragi-kun in?"

"Uh, sure."

Kanbaru shyly looked at me.

Her gaze seemed strangely apologetic.

She was like this when she explained the summary of Jacob's, it
seems like Kanbaru felt a sort of apprehensiveness when explaining
anything to people she saw as superior to herself.
An athletic type through and through.

"Well, Goethe's representative work was just like Oshino-san said...

I guess the easiest to explain feature is that it's composed of two
parts. The First Manuscript Faust and Faust, A Fragment comprising
Faust Part One and Faust Part Two. It's writing spanned more than
sixty years, it was a massive literary work. I take my hat off to the
author. Goethe had a bunch of other famous works such as The
Sorrows of Young Werther and Elective Affinities, but any literary critic
would agree that his most important work was Faust. Essentially,
for an introduction, the protagonist; Doctor Faust, sells his soul to
the devil Mephistopheles in exchange for all the knowledge in the
world. I won't say too much because I don't want to spoil it for you
but, the first part is about his romance with a young common
woman named Gretchen. The second part is about establishing an
ideal country. People most commonly interpret it as philosophical
thought or a story of a quest for knowledge. I'm sure you already
know but, there exists a concept called the Faustian Urge, in other
words, a desire to know and experience all there is in the world."

"..."

I wonder why exactly my very athletic type-like kouhai expects me

to know what a Faustian Urge is when I didn't even know what
Faust was.

"The main pivot of the story is Faust selling his soul to the devil. He
sells his soul in order to try to grant his wish based upon his
Faustian Urge... And the ending, I'll leave that to you to go to a book
store and find out, Araragi-kun. Well, up the point that the young
lady explained is all common knowledge. Knowing this much
should make my job a lot easier. I have to say that I'm impressed
you could explain a book that you haven't even read so well. If
there's anything I'd like to add on to your explanation, it would be...
that's right. It's actually surprising how few people know this even
though you could find this written in any commentary book on
Goethe. Well I guess no one reads these old books anymore. I'd not
talking about you, young lady, but a lot of people feel like they've
pretty much read these famous books even if they haven't, so they
end up not bothering to reading them. So I guess you couldn't really
expect people to know it anyway. But getting to the point, the story
Faust was actually based on a real person."

"What? Really?"

Kanbaru seemed surprised.

I've never read Faust so I don't know what she'd be surprised by.

"His name was Johann Faust. It's said that he lived during the
Renaissance... Well even as a real person, different readers have
different opinions, but his story became a sort of folk legend. It's
said he lived as either a doctor or a magician, wondering the earth.
But in any case, they say he sold his soul to the devil
Mephistopheles in exchange for all the knowledge and all the
experiences in the world, promising to become the enemy of all
Christians, from then living 24 years living as his Faustian Urges
would call him. But soon as his contract was ended, he too faced his
tragic end. If you want to know the details, read it yourself, it's all in
Doctor Faust."

"Hmm... Is that so."

Kanbaru appeared impressed at the extent of Oshino's

miscellaneous knowledge. Well apart from what he might know
about Faust and so on, anything involving folk legends is definitely
Oshino's field, I'd expect him to have a ton of sources backing him
up, but I wonder if Kanbaru's going to start praising him now. I'm
not really sure about her standards when it comes to these things
anyway, but it seems like she doesn't just shower everyone she
meets with praise no matter who they are...

"I thought for sure that Goethe made the character up himself. So he
actually based him off the word on the street?"

"Goethe added his own touch to the story, so it's more like Goethe's
version of Doctor Faustus. It's like Dazai's Run, Melos! or
Akutagawa's Rashoumon. The impression you get from Konjaku
Monogatari and Rashoumon is quite different. It's the same as that.
Lots of people other than Goethe turned the legend of Faust into
their own stories. A famous example would be Marlowe from
England. Have you heard of Marlowe? I'm not talking about Philip
Marlowe from Raymond Chandler's stories. I'm talking about
Christopher Marlowe. He's often introduced as a man who had a
great influenec on Shakespeare's works. You know, the guy who
wrote Doctor Faustus."

"I find it a little funny that Faust would be a doctor." Kanbaru said
with a strange bashfulness in her voice.

"Hmm?" said Oshino as he tilted his head to the side seemingly

puzzled. It seems like Oshino didn't quite get the meaning behind
Kanbaru's bashfulness.

"But... Oshino"

Somewhere along the way, it seemed like their conversation had

gone off topic, so I decided to try and join in, still not fully
understanding what Faust was about.
"So what's your point? I'm fine with your long winded explanations,
I have to hear them all the time anyway, but I don't understand how
is this supposed to help with Kanbaru's situation. Aren't we getting
off topic here? The part how Faust trades his soul in exchange for
the devil granting his wish is similar to the Monkey's Paw, but it's
not like Kanbaru's arm is the arm of the devil Mephistopheles that
appears in Faust right? You said that it wasn't a monkey's paw but a
devil's hand but..."

"Actually, that's exactly what I meant, Araragi-kun. You're pretty

sharp today, aren't you."

Oshino pointed at me tensely.

"It almost seems too convenient for the young lady, whose last
name has the character for 'God', to have a devil's hand, it's not as
convenient as a fight between a monkey and a crab or that girl who
was lost from a while ago. In this case, it just feels like a
coincidence. Mephistopheles wasn't some especially horrible devil
like fear incarnate, he was more of a common devil. He was a low
ranking devil, or maybe he didn't even have a rank. Sort of like an
expendable familiar. That would normally make it quite difficult to
identify what kind of devil he was, but now that we know he had
the arm of a monkey and that he was wearing a raincoat, we can
narrow down the number of possibilities. And the only one that
fuses with its owner, is the Rainy Devil."

The Rainy Devil.

"Just think of it as a devil's hand, not a monkey's paw, it's easier to

understand that way right? You start to wonder why a monkey
would grant a human's wish without any kind of compensation.
People might tell you that it was because of that old miracle worker
in India who infused the hand with mysterious powers if you asked
them why a monkey's paw would grant wishes in the first place,
but if it were a devil, it wouldn't need that kind of explanation. All
it wants is a soul in exchange."

"A soul..."

"In exchange for a soul, it'll grant you three wishes. Seems perfectly
normal for a devil."

"Hmm" Oshino laughed a little through his nose.

He was clearly making fun of me.

"Besides, if it were a monkey's hand it would be the right arm, not

the left."

"... Really?"

"When you use the monkey's hand you hold it with the right hand.
Then obviously it'd be the right hand. But a devil's hand... Even
considering that it isn't a run of the mill devil, this is definitely
surprising. There's not much that would surprise you anymore,
having already met a vampire and all, but in Japan, this sort of devil
is a big deal. It's worth collecting. It's not like Japan doesn't have it's
own share of youkai that can grant wishes though. Just look at the
class president, or tsundere-chan, or that lost girl, when you look at
it this way, they're all the same. This is one strange town. We just
might end up summoning Yama, the god of death. Young lady, you
said your mother passed that hand down to you right? Kanbaru
was your father's last name wasn't it. Do you know your mother's
maiden name?"
"If I remember correctly... it was a bit of a weird name." Kanbaru
replied, slowly searching through her memories.

"It should be 'Gaen'. Written like 'Ga' from a proverb meaning to do

whatever it takes to get what you want, and 'En' meaning smoke.
Gaen Tooe was my mother's name before she was married."

"... Hee, I see. And 'Tooe' is from 'To' meaning far and 'E' from the
Yangtze River. You could also read it like 'Toutoumi' like Toutoumi
Province. And young lady, your name; 'Suruga' is from Suruga
Province. Haha, your parents sure had good taste."

"After they were married obviously, her name was Kanbaru Tooe.
But Oshino-san, what does this have to do with anything?"

"'What does this have to do with anything?' Did you just ask me
that? Nah, it doesn't have to do with anything, I was just passing
time. And that background info doesn't have to do with anything
either. So, Araragi-kun, and young lady, now that you've heard
everything, even if it doesn't matter whether it's really a monkey's
hand or a devil's hand you guys came to me for help. So what are
you planning to do now?"

"What are we planning..."

"Well, Araragi-kun, of course, I'm just as good as any other expert.

With my random trivia knowledge and phony qualifications, I
wouldn't mind lending you a hand in these situations you know."

"Can..." Kanbaru leaned forward.

"Can you save me?"

"I can't save you. All I can do is lend you a hand. You have so save
yourself. Young lady, if you're looking for someone to save you,
you're barking up the wrong tree. That isn't my role in the first
place. But, in this case... Araragi-kun, what should I do?"

His tone was sinister, but he wasn't expecting an answer he already

knew, but like he really was waiting for me to answer, he said
nothing afterwards. I wonder why? Isn't it obvious what he should
do?"

"Oi, Oshino..."

"In other words, I was asking how I should help, Araragi-kun.

Should I help the young lady grant her second wish? Or should I
help her cancel it? Or should I help the young lady turn her left arm
back to normal? Or all of those? I guess all of them would be asking
for a bit too much though... But what I can say is that none of those
are going to be easy."

"No... uh"

If I said "all of them", would he actually do that?

But.

"There are two simple ways to solve the current situation. The first
is for Araragi-kun to be killed by the monster in the raincoat, the
Rainy Devil. Then then young lady's arm will go back to normal
and her wish will be granted. The other option is to completely cut
off that beast's left arm which has assimilated with the kaii."

"C-Cut it off?" I was caught off guard by Oshino's rather dangerous

suggestion.
"... Is it possible to only cut off the monkey's, I mean the devil's part?
And then afterward, will the arm grow back?"

"It's not like a lizard's tail. there's no way things would work out so
conveniently. Honestly, losing one arm to solve the whole problem
seems like a pretty sweat deal to me." Oshino was casual as ever,
but it was no joke.

This isn't a question of a good or bad deal.

Normally it might be, but it's more serious in Kanbaru's case. She'd
never play basketball again. Just thinking of how much basketball
saved Kanbaru, and how much she still leaned on it, even if he had
just thought of it, he shouldn't have said it out loud.

"U-Uhh, that might be kind of bad for me."

"You tried to kill someone you know? Don't you think this is the
least you can do make up for that, young lady?"

Oshino paid no heed to Kanbaru's troubles with his strict words. In

times like these, Oshino doesn't have a speck of compassion or
mercy. Just like with Hanekawa and Senjougahara...

"Well, Araragi-kun dying would also work just fine in terms of

solving the problem."

"O-Oi, I know what you're saying but wait a second, Oshino. She
did try to kill someone... you're talking about me right? But that's
not what Kanbaru wanted. She only wanted to be with
Senjougahara..."

"She just wanted to be with her? Funny." Oshino spoke to me, his
tone as grave as before.
"You're such a nice guy, aren't you Araragi-kun? Such a nice and
good person... Such a nice and good person. You make me sick.
Really. How many people do you have to hurt being so nice before
you'll be happy? Just like with Shinobu-chan. 'I just wanted to be
with her', do you really believe that sappy bullshit?"

"... Are you saying she's lying." I objected to Oshino as I looked at

Kanbaru.

Kanbaru was silent.

"Oi, Kanbaru..."

"Just as an example, Araragi-kun. Don't you think it's weird? When

she was in elementary school and she made her first wish, why do
you think the left arm beat up all the other kids instead of just
letting the young lady run faster?"

"That's because... well, the monkey's paw grants its owner's wish in
a way they didn't intend, so..."

"But, that isn't the monkey's paw." Oshino laid out the facts.

"It takes your soul, and in exchange it grants your wish, just how
you wanted it. The Rainy Devil is a low level devil, and it's in its
nature to use violence, but a contract is a contract. A deal is a deal. If
she wished to run fast, she should have just become fast normally.
Would messing up all the other kids make her run faster? Don't you
think the relationship between the cause and effect is weird? Don't
you think it's obvious that if it just beat up all the kids she was
going to race with, she'd just be put into another group?"

"..."
He's right.

"... Then why. Why did the monster in the raincoat..."

"Because it wanted to. Our young lady had just transferred into a
new school, couldn't make any friends and all the kids were making
fun of her. She said it wasn't really as bad as bullying, but that's
what everyone who gets bullied says. Being persecuted by her
classmates right during the hard time when her parents died, who
wouldn't want to get revenge? You'd be weird if you didn't want
to."

"I..." She broke off mid sentence and fell silent again.

I wonder how Kanbaru would have tried to explain it.

And why she stopped.

What did she realize?

"It was all subconsciously, obviously. I think it was her

subconscious that wished for that. She'd know if she wanted it
consciously. In terms of what she aware of, it's the same as her
thinking she just wanted to run fast. But, that's just what's on the
surface, underneath, it's a different story. Behind that wish, there
was a dark desire. She wanted to beat her classmates. She wanted to
beat them up. Even if it was just subconsciously, that's what our
young lady wished for. The devil saw through to that desire. It
figured out what was beneath that wish. But you should have
known that all along, right young lady? Even if was your
subconscious, those were your own feelings. But you didn't want to
admit that, so you looked for a different explanation for the
phenomena... 'The Monkey's Paw'. The important part wasn't that it
granted wishes, it was that it granted them in a way its owner
didn't intend. It was all a psychological excuse that she didn't want
to attack her classmates. Well, that's important."

A psychological excuse.

The problem of how to explain it.

"Not just the monkey's paw, but with most kaii that grant wishes,
usually the protagonist meets a tragic fate and the story ends. That
means when our young lady was researching kaii in elementary
school, she must have come across other kaii. And the one she chose
just happened to be Jacobs' The Monkey's Paw. But how has that
turned out for you young lady, have you actually met a tragic fate?
Is your life full or sorrow now that your wish has been granted?
Can you say to Araragi-kun that your classmates getting beat up
made your life a tragedy? Don't you think it's normal to just say that
you had it coming and you got what you deserved?"

"... Normal? But, Oshino"

"Haha, Araragi-kun, are you wondering what proof I have to back

me up? Isn't it obvious if you listened to what she said? It's plain as
day. What do you think happened to our young lady's arm in
elementary school?"

Now that he mentions it.

Back then the mummy's left hand only extended up to her wrist, so
what happened to it?

"She didn't mention anything about a bandage did she. The next
day, she didn't realize that anything had happened until she got to
class and noticed that the four of them were missing. She would
have realized that something had happened if her hand became like
it is now. So, what do you think happened? In other words, that
night, when she beat up those kids, her wish had already been
granted. In that one night, the kaii had already assimilated itself
with the young lady's left arm without her even noticing, and it left
her left hand also without her noticing. It left, and using the part of
her soul that it acquired in exchange for granting her wish, it
matured, and it extended from her left wrist all the way to her left
arm."

"... You're saying... Oi, Oshino, that means..."

I already knew that.

But that tone.

"What I mean, Araragi-kun, is that your first guess was right on the
money. It's not often that you actually figure out the right answer. I
said it didn't it? You're pretty sharp today. We should have just
thought reasonably, without making things more complicated that
they have to be, normally, even obviously. You're really a nice
person aren't you, to even believe the aggressor's excuses. There's
no way you could be on the jury. After all, you're the man who stole
her beloved senpai. Don't you think it's obvious she'd be so jealous
she'd want to kill you? Did you really believe the young lady when
she said that it wasn't intentional? It was all what she wanted. Do
you think that that left hand really has it's own will?" said Oshino.

008

The Rainy Devil was apparently an incredibly violent demon. Most

of all, it loved all negative emotions such as malice, hostility, hatred,
regret, jealousy, and envy. It saw through to peoples dark sides,
provoked them, drew them out, and brought them to fruition. Just
like some sort of harassment, it would ask for someones wish and,
also just like some sort of harassment, it would make that wish
come true. The contract itself was to grant three wishes in exchange
for that persons soul. Once those three wishes had been granted,
the person supposedly had their life and body taken. In other
words, the human themselves became a demon. That was
apparently how this one worked. If, when Kanbaru had learned of
Senjougaharas secret a year before, she had made a wish to solve
the issue, that wish probably wouldnt have been granted. The
Rainy Devil could only grant violent and negative wishes.

The demon read the hidden side of the wish.

Every wish had a hidden side.

She had wanted to be faster because she had hated her classmates.

She had wanted to be by Senjougaharas sidebecause she had

hated Araragi Koyomi.

Yes, it read that hidden side.

Yes, it saw that hidden side.

It saw through to the subconscious desire.

This demon saw through everything.

She had felt no regrets over giving up that position, but she had not
been able to stand seeing someone else there. If someone was going
to be there, it might as well have been her.

And so she decided it should have been her.

The Rainy Devil was a demon told of since ancient times in Europe.
It was often depicted as a monkey in a raincoat.

In that way, it was not entirely wrong to call her left hand a
monkeys paw, but at any rate, her first and second wishes had
come from what she had subconsciously either explicitly or
implicitly wished for.

First, it had been the classmates who had teased her.

Then, it had been me.

Her classmates during elementary school had only been injured

while I had nearly been killed. That difference may have come from
the difference in Kanbarus feelingsthe difference in her negative
emotions. The growth of her athletic abilities may have played a
direct or indirect role, but the psychological side would have been
even more important.

Of course, Oshino may have been exactly right that I hadnt given it
enough thought.

If Kanbaru truly had wished to the Rainy Devil that that she could
be by Senjougaharas side, it made no sense for her to be worried for
my safety. After hearing her story from elementary school, I could
see why she would be worried that her violent left hand would try
to eliminate me, but how had she known with such certainty that
would happen? She had no way of knowing exactly how the paw
would grant her wish and how it would go against her wishes in
doing so.

She had subconsciously known what she had subconsciously

wished for.

She had known I was in danger.

She had not immediately appeared in front of me as a raincoat
monster with the Oddity fused with her left hand, but Oshino had
said that was likely because she had resisted the urge. She had
created enough friction to just barely hold it back.

Working hard to make yourself faster was the greatest excuse to

yourself. Its laughable to think the mummy did nothing because
you had granted the wish yourself. You may have believed that or
wanted to believe that and you may not have been entirely wrong,
but the Rainy Devil violently granted your hidden wish, not your
stated one. However, your work to handle it all yourself has paid
off nicely here. Even now that the Oddity has fused with your arm,
you can restrain it. In that way, this Oddity really is more like an
item. It can be influenced by its owners will Of course, to be
realistic, what were calling a demon is just the one arm, so the
Rainy Devil probably cant use its full power. It couldnt draw out
enough of your subconscious mind to overpower your conscious
mind. Basically, your left arm didnt activate while you were
worried about Araragi-kun. Stalking him over the past four days
did have its effect. You may not have seen it that way, but it was all
happening subconsciously. Butwas it yesterday? You learned
about Araragi-kun and Tsundere-chan being all alone together for
astudy group, was it? Until then, them dating was only a rumor
and a possibility, but that finally confirmed it for you. After that,
you couldnt hold back. Just as Araragi-kun guessed.

Had the demon slipped in through the gap in her heart?

Oshino never put it that way.

He thoroughly despised that kind of indulgent weakness.

But
Kanbaru had indeed said that it began as jealousy and ended as
jealousy.

Okay, that should about do it.

After having my blood sucked to the very limit, I spoke to Shinobu

while we sat together in what amounted to an embrace. I lightly
patted her small back. She gently removed her fangs from the two
holes on my neck and a few drops of blood dripped down, so she
neatly licked them up with her tongue.

Whether embracing Shinobu like this qualified as cheating in

Senjougaharas book was something I would have to think about in
the future, but I could only hope she would have mercy since it was
the only way of accomplishing what needed to be done. Shinobus
current body was impossibly small and unreliable compared to
spring break. I barely felt anything in my arms, like I was
embracing fog or mist.

Oops.

I stood up from my crouching position and wobbled a little. It

should hardly have been surprising, but just after having my blood
sucked, I was afflicted with some anemic symptoms. This time was
especially bad because I had given quite a bit of blood.

It was nearly five times the default.

I lightly hopped up and down.

That said, my own senses didnt change all that much. All of my
bodys parameters were enhanced, so I didnt really know what was
different from normal.
Shinobu returned to her previous sitting position.

She wrapped her arms around her raised knees as if embracing

herself to ensure that she was still there.

She no longer looked in my direction.

A kind and nice person, huh?

No matter how much I insisted I was neither kind nor nice, the one
who had fallen victim to that the worst of all was this blonde
vampire, so I could see why Oshino wanted to say that.

It had less to do with me and more to do with Shinobu.

I grabbed her goggled helmet from the top and shook it left and
right. She still didnt respond for a while, as if ignoring me, but it
must have gotten annoying because she violently swept my hand
aside.

Good.

Satisfied with that, I copied Oshino by not saying a word in parting

as I turned my back, walked to the stairway landing, and descended
to the third floor. As I continued right on down to the second floor, I
thought about bringing her a D-Pop from Mister Donut next time I
saw her.

Oshino Meme waited for me in front of the classroom door all the
way down the hall. He was leaning against the wall with his arms
crossed and one leg cheerfully dangling down.
Oh, I was waiting, Araragi-kun. That took longer than expected.

Yeah. I didnt quite know where the borderline was. This might
not even be quite enoughbut I guess its better than having her
drink too much. For both us.

Hmm. Well, I suppose thats true, but you dont need to worry so
much about Shinobu-chan. Shes bound by my name, so nothings
going to happen. To name is to tame, after all. In fact, Id be more
worried about her starving. And you need to put on an act of
having a big fight with this demon, so I dont think its a good time
to worry about that. Worry too much and the only act youll be
putting on is a comedy. If you only just barely drew out enough,
you arent going to have good odds of winning this. Even if you are
only up against the left arm.

We had a plan to deal with the Rainy Devil.

An exorcism was usually a major undertaking requiring lots of time

and effort, but even with a low-level demon like the Rainy Devil,
not even Oshino could pull that off. The truth of that was
questionable since I only had his word to go on, but at the very
least, he wasnt going to help this time.

This was different than with Senjougahara.

While her crab could be called an Oddity that granted wishes, it had
been a god while this one was a demon. Even an amateur like me
could tell we couldnt just do the same thing here.

The Kan of Kanbaru meant god, yet she had a demon.

It felt more like irony than a hint.

But we didnt have the time for anything major.

If we didnt deal with this soon, I could lose my life this very night.
Our options were to let Kanbaru kill me or to chop off her left arm.
Unfortunately, I had enough of an attachment to my life that I
couldnt choose to end this story with the former option. And
chopping of Kanbarus arm was even more out of the question.

That meant we needed a third option.

A contract, huh? I just hope that gets the demon to obediently

return to the demon world or spirit world or whatever.

Yes, but both the demon world and spirit world arent some
different world. Theyre right here. Well, the details would
probably turn into an argument much like one weve already had,
so Ill leave that for later. But dont worry. I can guarantee you this,
Araragi-kun. If the contract cant be completed, its rendered null and
void. Theres no cooling-off period, but the young ladys wish will
also be rendered null and void. And the incompetent demon that
couldnt complete its pitiful job will leave without saying a word.

The demon would leave if it could not complete its contract.

In other words, if the demon cant kill me.

Thats right. Oshino grinned. Of course, youll only have gained

so much power by giving your blood to Shinobu-chan. If you
think of it as having about a tenth of the your power as a vampire
during summer break, youll still be overestimating yourself.

Thats still quite a lot.

But this is only because that Rainy Devil is just the left arm. If it was
the full body, you wouldnt stand a chance, but with an entire
humans worth of weight hanging off of it, you have reasonably,
wonderfully, perfectly good odds of victory.

The Rainy Devil was a completely different sort of Oddity to the

monkeys paw. Granting wishes was the only overlap. It was
generally viewed as a raincoat demon because it normally had an
entire body. (In this case, how one defined an entire body
changed ones viewpoint of the issue, but that will be omitted here.)
Oshino had speculated that it was only a left hand and that it was
mummified because a powerful seal had been placed on it.

Well, it seems the young ladys mothers family was the problem
there. That may have been why her parents were forced to elope.
Well, Im not about to expose or peek at other peoples family issues
with groundless speculation. A mummified demon is actually quite
a big deal. Ive heard of mummified mermaids, but not this. If it was
only to the wrist when she was first given it, Im incredibly curious
what happened to the rest of it.

Her mother.

Both Senjougahara Hitagi and Hachikuji Mayois Oddities had been

related to their mothers.

It seemed the same was true of Kanbaru Suruga.

Then again, just like Kanbarus father, it seemed her mother had
also cut off all ties with her family when she had eloped. Kanbaru
herself had no connection to her mothers family, so we had no way
of looking into that at the moment.
By the way, what would happen if all of the demons parts were
gathered? Would even Shinobu in her prime be no match for the
Rainy Devil?

Dont be ridiculous. Its just a low-level demon. It wouldnt stand a

chance against a true vampire. It would be one thing if she was up
against Mephistopheles, but that fight would be over in two
seconds. The gathered body would be pulverized, every last drop of
fluid would be sucked from its body, and that would be that. Have
you forgotten just how dreadful a legendary vampire Shinobu-chan
was? You cant stand up to her. You just dont stand a chance. The
Rainy Devils rank would be far weaker even than Class Rep-chans
sex-obsessed cat. Oh, but that doesnt mean you can think about
getting Shinobu-chans help. You could do that if you were simply
trying to exterminate the thing, but that would mean chopping off
the young ladys arm would be the only option. This only has
meaning if you do it, Araragi-kun.

The Rainy Devil hijacks the persons body by granting their

wishes, right? With each wish, they grow closer to being a demon.
The mummy was originally just a hand, but it grew to the elbow
after granting Kanbarus first wish. Then what about this, Oshino?
What would happen to her if her hateful wish to kill me and some
third wish were granted? Would the hijacking only reach her
shoulder at the most?

I can only give the bureaucratic answer of I do not know as there

is no precedent. But based on what Ive seen, youre probably right
that it would only hijack her body up to the shoulder. But that
makes no difference. It means having it hijack her up to the
shoulder is the same as having it hijack her entire body. Its like
controlling thirty percent of a publicly traded companys shares.
I had a feeling.

Shell lose her soul either way. Theres not much you can do once
you only have an empty shell of a body leftover. Oh, you can leave
your bag and valuables with me, Araragi-kun. Theyd just weigh
you down.

Yeahthanks. Wait here for me.

I pulled my cellphone from my back pocket and my house key from

my jacket pocket, tossed them into my rucksack, and handed the
rucksack to Oshino.

Good, he said while placing the sling over one shoulder. But can
I ask one thing, Araragi-kun?

What is it?

Why are you trying to save someone who tried to kill you? Even if
it was subconsciously and even if it was the hidden side of her wish,
she still hates you. She sees you as her hated rival in love.

He always spoke in a cruel, light tone.

But this was different.

In fact, why did you try to talk to her about this once you realized
the raincoat was her? Normally, someone would have pushed her
away and come running to me without asking her a thing.

Everyone hates someone at some point. And while Im not going

to let her kill me, she was doing it because of her feelings for
Senjougahara.
Oddities always had an appropriate reason for their actions.

And if that was the reason here

I can forgive her.

If Oshino was right and my initial thinking had been accurate, then
nothing had changed. We were back to square one. The monkeys
paw and Rainy Devil issues were irrelevant. I certainly hadnt
expected to be her rival in love, but still.

Underhanded calculations.

Black-hearted regrets.

While I may have been a kind and nice person, I wasnt an

impeccably good person like Hanekawa.

Hanekawa Tsubasa.

The girl with the bizarre wings.

She alone I was truly and distinctly jealous of.

I really did envy her.

I see. Well, if thats what youve decided, thats fine by me. Its not
a problem and none of my business. So, anyway, Araragi-kun, go
give that young lady some help. Just to be clear, once you go in
there, you cant leave until its over. The door will be impossible to
open from the inside. Keep in mind that the option to flee is off the
table from the beginning. You need to build your resolve and think
back to spring break to remember just what it means to be in a
situation where you cant turn back. And of course, Shinobu-chan
and I arent going to show up to save you no matter what happens.
Dont forget that Im a pacifist whos strayed from the standard
path and a humanitarian whos strayed from the path of
opportunity. Once I see you enter this classroom, Im going back to
the fourth floor to sleep, so I wont even know whats happening.
You and the young lady dont need to say goodbye when you leave,
either. Shinobu-chan will probably be asleep by then too, so just
leave.

Sorry about all the trouble.

Its fine.

Oshino removed his back from the wall and opened the door.

I entered without hesitation and he immediately closed the door

behind me.

Now I couldnt leave.

I was in the farthest back classroom on the second floor. It was

made just like the previous one on the fourth floor, but it was the
one classroom in the abandoned cram school thats windows
werent destroyed. However, that did not mean the glass had not
been shattered. It meant the broken windows had several thick
wooden boards nailed over them like someone had been preparing
for a typhoon. There were so many boards it made me wonder why
whoever had done it had been so thorough. So once the door was
closed, not a single ray of light made it inside. It was already late at
night, but not even the starlight made it in.

It was pitch black.

However, I could see.

After giving plenty of blood to Shinobu, I could see right through
the darkness. In fact, I could see better in the dark than the light at
the moment. And I slowly moved my eyes.

I found her right away.

The classroom was not that large and just the one person stood
there.

They wore a raincoat.

Hi.

I called out to them, but they did not respond.

They were apparently already in a trance-like state.

The body was Kanbaru Surugas, but the left arm and the current
soul were the Rainy Devils. Incidentally, the raincoat was one
Kanbaru had bought after running to the nearest store while I was
letting Shinobu drink my blood. The raincoat wasnt technically
necessary and it was really more like an optional item, but it helped
set the scene and the mood for the ceremony.

The classrooms desks and chairs had been in the way, so we had
removed them. That meant Kanbaru and I were the only things in
the classroom. Only the Rainy Devils left arm and a vampire-like
non-human.

We were both in an in-between state, so it was sure to be a decent

match.

Oh, but this couldnt just be a match. I had to utterly overwhelm the
demon.
Just like the previous night, the inside of the raincoats hood looked
like a deep cave, so I couldnt see her expression or anything else
inside.

The standard way of fighting back against the Rainy Devil or any
other Oddity that granted wishes was to wish for something the
Oddity could not grant.

A far too large wish.

A contradictory wish.

An utterly impossible wish.

A wish that placed them in the dilemma of a double bind.

Oshino had compared it to a bottomless ladle. It would allow us to

repel the Oddity and anticipate the Oddity.

But in this case, Kanbaru had already wished to be with

Senjougahara. And since that feeling included her hatred of me for
being in the way, she had subconsciously wished to kill me. The
Rainy Devil was trying to grant that subconscious wish.

We could not cancel the wish.

Once she had felt that desire, it was too late.

That meant we had to turn around our reasoning.

We just had to make that wish impossible.

We just had to turn Araragi Koyomi into something a mere Rainy
Devil could not kill.

I guess its true that you can make a decent argument for anything.
It sounds a lot like sophistry and like complete monkey business,
but I suppose it makes for a fine-whoops!

I dont know what triggered it, but the rain coat suddenly leaped
toward me. Kanbaru Surugas jumping strength had been increased
by the power of her grudge. Normally, it would have been too fast
to follow, but not right now.

I could see it.

And I could re-

-act! W-wah!

It used centrifugal force to twist my own body away from the

raincoats left fist. I only just barely dodged it. I continued spinning
as I moved away. It was pathetic, but I decided I needed to regain
my footing for the time being.

What had just happened?

I had a feeling she was even faster than the night before, but I
decided my eyes just hadnt grown accustomed to this yet. I needed
to dodge the left hands attack, find an opening, grab Kanbarus
body that was really just a weight to the raincoat, and restrain it.

It had already caught up to me.

I couldnt believe it. I hadnt expected to overwhelm the raincoat
when it came to speed, but I was still far, far more powerful than
the night before thanks to Shinobu. And yet the raincoat easily
swung its left fist. Dodging to the left was out of the question, so I
tried to circle around on the right side.

The exposed arm covered in black fur grazed my cheek and flew
through empty air. The wind pressure seemed to tear at my body,
but I focused on throwing a kick into the raincoats unguarded side.

Sorry, Kanbaru!

I apologized to her in my heart.

As expected, only the left arm was so abnormally powerful. The

raincoats body flew in the direction I had kicked it. It then lost its
balance and half collapsed onto the linoleum floor.

Only controlling the left arm really did seem to be a bottleneck for
the raincoat. It had awful balance and the rest of the body clearly
could not keep up with the arm.

But then how could I explain that speed from before? Had the
raincoat not been going all out during the attack the night before?
Had it raised its speed to match my increased power? But why
would an Oddity feel the need to hold back like that?

I didnt know.

And before I could figure anything out, the raincoat stood up.

Even if I ignored that this was Kanbarus body, I didnt have it in

me to literally kick someone while they were down. I knew I had to,
but I still hesitated. And yet I knew this was no time to be
hesitating.

I was a kind and nice person.

I hated being called that.

That was what you called a bland, uninteresting person.

The raincoats left fist took the shortest path to me. This time, that
catapult-like punch struck me near the right shoulder. The raincoat
had probably been aiming for the center of my body, but I somehow
managed to shift out of the way. Unfortunately, I hadnt managed
to dodge it entirely. I couldnt follow it; it was just too fast. I was
knocked about three meters back. I used my physical sense of
equilibrium to spin through the air and land. The raincoats fist had
turned my bike to scraps and destroyed a cement block wall, but
this time I wasnt knocked an impossibly long distance and I didnt
have decisive damage done to my body. There was of course
damage, but not so much that I couldnt move. My shoulder was
dislocated and the bone seemed to have at least cracked, but I
recovered almost immediately thanks to my vampiric healing
power. The sharp pain receded in an instant. It was a nostalgic
sensation. I was looking forward to sunrise the next day. Just how
badly was I going to be burned?

However, I didnt have time to think about that. The raincoat made
another attack as I landed. It attacked again and again. It did not
hesitate. The left fist flew toward my face this time. My eyes still
werent entirely accustomed to the increase in ability and I took the
blow straight to the face. I heard my nose breaking. If that had
happened to me, then a normal humans head would have been
smashed to smithereens. It scared me to even imagine what kind of
destructive force the blow had held. I pathetically crawled along the
floor to move away from the raincoat. My broken nose recovered as
I did so. It was a truly unpleasant sensation. It felt like I had become
an amoeba or something. If this was only one-tenth, how hellish
had my spring break been?

I managed to dodge the next punch, but the edge of the next one
grazed me.

Dammit!

Why?

Why cant I dodge?

Even if it was a direct attack with no wasted movement, it was a

simple movement with so much force behind it that I thought the
arm was going to tear off at the shoulder like a rocket punch from a
robot anime. Just because there was little preliminary motion
shouldnt have meant I couldnt see it coming, so why couldnt I
keep up? Why couldnt I escape? Its speed had clearly risen several
times over from the day before. The power didnt seem to have and
not even being hit by a few of these attacksno, a few dozen of
them would bring this to an end thanks to my current body, so why
was the speed alone so incredibly different?

What was different between today and yesterday?

She wore a raincoat.

Her exposed left arm was that of a beast.

Her right arm was also exposed, but it had the same deep, hollow
aura as the inside of the hood and I couldnt seem to see it even
though I clearly could see it. The day before, the raincoat had worn
rubber gloves, so neither of her arms had been exposed. But what
did that matter? Rubber gloves werent going to slow her down
any.

That was when it hit me.

I realized my mistake.

It wasnt the rubber gloves. It was the boots!

Kanbaru had only bought a raincoat at the store. She hadnt bought
gloves and boots as well. It wasnt that she had deemed that
unnecessary for setting the mood; in all likelihood, she simply
hadnt thought of it. Even I had only just now noticed, after all. I
didnt know how the Rainy Devil was depicted, but since Oshino
had thought of the Rainy Devil based on just the raincoat, that
probably represented its personality well enough. And if that was
enough to represent it as an Oddity, then neither Kanbaru nor I had
been wrong.

But without the boots, the raincoat was wearing sneakers. That was
obvious at a glance. The raincoat did not have bare feet to match its
exposed hands. It was still wearing the shoes Kanbaru had been
wearing.

The sneakers looked quite high quality.

They allowed for speed on an entirely different level from rain

boots.

Especially for an athlete on Kanbaru Surugas level.

I screwed up.
Any obvious shackles or other bonds made to weigh down
Kanbarus body from the beginning were out of the question based
on our strategy and our objective. However, rain boots may have
been an acceptable handicap. Why had I gone out of the way to
create a situation that allowed the raincoat to draw out 100% of its
power? Kanbaru Surugas body was supposed to weigh her down
well, weigh her left hand down and yet it was nimbly keeping up
with that arm.

Damn.

I never seemed to go quite far enough.

This meant I couldnt just dodge. I could only just barely pull it off
and oftentimes I didnt even fully dodge the hit. Since the damage
wouldnt build up in my body, I wouldnt be worn down like in a
fighting game, but I also wouldnt be able to accomplish my goal of
earning an overwhelming victory. And it didnt look like giving my
eyes time to adjust would solve this. It looked like my only choice
was to take the raincoats attack head-on to get in an attack of my
own. I lowered my hips and held my hands forward like a goalie
during a penalty kick. Or maybe in this case it would be better to
compare it to a man-to-man defense in basketball.

Regardless, the catapult, which would clearly be a foul in basketball

(what kind of foul, I dont know), flew straight toward the base of
my neck. In order to stop the punch with both hands, I tried to grab
the raincoats fist with my right hand, its wrist with my left hand,
and its arm with my entire body, but I didnt make it in time. No, it
wasnt that I didnt make it in time. My hands arrived in time, but
they couldnt stop the catapult. A sensed a few of my fingers
breaking just before the fist hit my collarbone. My body tilted
backwards, but I somehow managed to hold my ground. I hadnt
stopped the punch, but I had likely worn down its power before it
reached my body.

Before the raincoat could pull back its fist, I used my hands (and the
already-healed broken fingers) to grab the arm. I had finally
stopped the raincoat from moving as I had initially planned. I had
finally managed to grab it.

Okay. And now

Kanbaru, sorry!

This time I apologized out loud. As the raincoats left arm violently
tried to break away, I held it in place with both hands and sent the
outer edge of my foot into its leg, gut, and chest in quick succession.
The structure of the human body would not have allowed for that
sort of attack in a normal state. While the raincoat could only use its
left fist to attack, I could use my entire body and I needed to use
that difference and that advantage to its fullest.

The raincoats left arm moved like mad.

I had damaged it.

Oshino was probably right that I wouldnt have stood a chance if

the Rainy Devil had been the entire body, but as long as I kept the
left arm from moving, I could overwhelm it. As long as I wasnt hit
by the fist too rapidly, I could recover from its damage in an instant,
so the real danger was Kanbarus increased leg strength. The
sneakers issue was truly unexpected, but as long as I could restrain
that as well, I only had to keep kicking the Rainy Devil until it gave
up. And if it didnt give up, Id keep at it until it gave up the ghost.
It was a lot like the Surugadoi torture and it wasnt pleasant, but
since I couldnt tear off Kanbarus left arm and certainly couldnt
end her life, I could only keep attacking and tormenting the demon
until it left.

The raincoats legs crumbled below it.

I assumed my persistent low kicks had finally started paying off,

but I was wrong. The crumbledno, the bent legs hopped up along
the shortest route toward my jaw. This wasnt the left arm. The
raincoats left leg Kanbarus lithe leg performed a raised
roundhouse kick that struck my temple as accurately as threading a
needle. The blow was of course nowhere near as powerful as the left
arm, but it still directly transformed Kanbarus leg strength into
attack power. It had also been a complete surprise to me, so my
brain was rattled and my vision wavered. Damage to the sensory
organs was effective even to the body of a (pseudo) vampire. That
had been an important lesson during spring break.

I let go of the raincoats left arm.

I did so to defend against the raincoats next kick.

The kick hit my crossed arms. It wasnt as much as the catapult

punch, but the shock left my thoughts in an unexplainable and
confused state.

It could use more than just the left arm?

But Oshino had said the rest was just a weight.

Is that whats going on here?

I could only think of one answer.

If the Rainy Devils source of energy was negative emotions, then it
would be consuming Kanbaru Surugas jealousy toward me. If the
left fist was the catapult, then Kanbarus body was the aircraft
carrier itself. Her heated thoughts and feelings were compressed
inside her body like pressurized steam, so the body was not being
dragged around by the left arm as a mere weight. Well, that was
still essentially true, but when the Rainy Devil felt it was in danger
as it had back then, was it willing to use the rest of the body for
defense?

No, that was dodging the issue.

If I wanted to say I could forgive Kanbaru, then I couldnt skirt the

truth now. It wasnt fair to refer to her like frog legs moving on
spinal reflex when given a jolt of electricity.

In other words

Kanbaru herself was moving her feet.

Kanbaru Surugas will was in charge here.

On a subconscious level, she was rejecting this.

She was rejecting the possibility of losing the Rainy Devils left arm.

She was rejecting the possibility of not having her second wish
granted.

She was rejecting the possibility of not killing me.

She did not want to give up on Senjougahara.

Black-heartedregrets, huh?
I knew that feeling.

I knew it all too well.

I knew it painfully well.

Because I too had lost ithad thrown it away.

Because I would never get it again.

For some reason, the raincoat had stopped moving. It stood there
with its left fist held straight out like a magnet obeying magnetism.
It almost seemed to be lost in some kind of complex thoughts.

Or like it was hesitating.

The raincoat had shown no hesitation before, but now it stopped.

This was Kanbaru Suruga.

She was Senjougahara Hitagis underclassman.

She was the basketball teams ace.

She had asked to have her arm cut off.

As soon as Oshino had unnecessarily revealed that it was not the

monkeys paw but a demons hand and that it had granted her
wishes as she had wished them, she had closed her eyes for a few
seconds, firmly raised her head, looked to Oshino and me, and then
spoke.

I dont need this hand.

Her usual smile had of course not been present then.

She had spoken with the same flat, plain, and emotionless tone of
her beloved upperclassmans current personality.

Chop it off. I want you to cut it off. I beg you. It will be trouble for
you, but please. I cant cut off my own arm.

S-stop that.

I had quickly pushed her proffered arm back toward her. The furry
sensation had been unpleasant. I had shuddered.

It had given me a chill.

Dont be ridiculous. We cant possibly do that. How would you

play basketball?

As Oshino-san said earlier, I tried to kill someone. This is the

natural price to pay.

W-wait, Kanbaru. I dont mind at all

How foolish a clown Id been.

Those words couldnt have been more off target.

It had nothing to do with whether I minded.

In fact, whether I would forgive her or not was utterly irrelevant in

this case. It was all about whether Kanbaru Suruga could forgive
herself.

She had continued running because she had not wanted to harm her
classmates.

She had restrained and overwhelmed all of her negative emotions.

She had sealed them away.

And that powerful will was binding her now.

It was punishing her.

B-besides, we cant just cut off your arm. Stop being so ridiculous.
What are you thinking? Youre an idiot. You really are. Why do you
jump to conclusions like that? We cant take that idea seriously.

I see. Youre right. I shouldnt have asked someone else to cut off
my arm. No ones going to just say okay and do it if you ask them
that. Understood. Ill think of a way to do it on my own. I can
probably pull it off with the help of a car or train.

You mean?

A car or a train?

That sounded like suicide.

Not just suicidal. Suicide itself.

If you want to cut it off, we have a handy method here. Why

wouldnt you tell her, Araragi-kun? Its not very nice to ignore
someone in need. You can just get Shinobu-chans help. She is the
heart under the blade, so you can use her precious blade to sever
your left arm so quickly you wont have time to feel any pain. As
she is now, it wont have the edge it once did, but cutting off your
skinny arm like tofu would be a piece of cake.

Be quiet, Oshino! Hey, Kanbaru! You dont need to worry about

this so much! And you dont need to feel even an ounce of
responsibility! Weve already shown that this is all about the
monkeys pawno, the Rainy Devil!

The Oddity only granted her wish, didnt it?

Oshino had refused to be quiet.

In fact, he had spoken all the more eloquently and all the more
fluently.

It only gave her what she wanted, didnt it? Wasnt it the same
with Tsundere-chan? This isnt like what happened to you during
spring break. Its completely different from what happened with
Shinobu-chan. You didnt wish for anything from the Oddity, Araragi-
kun.

So you cant understand how she feels. You cant understand her
self-condemnation or regret. You cant in the slightest, he told me.
By the way, in the original monkeys paw story, the first person
who used the monkeys paw wished for their own death after their
first and second wishes were granted. Do I really have to explain
what exactly that wish means?

Oshino

What he was saying was right.

But he was wrong.

I continued to face the raincoat in something like a stalemate and I

slowly reminisced as neither of us moved.
I did understand.

I understood painfully well. Until the wound in my heart ached.

I understood how Senjougahara Hitagi felt.

And I understood how Kanbaru Suruga felt.

Or maybe I didnt really understand.

Maybe I was only being arrogant and conceited.

But we held the same pain inside.

We shared it.

How could I say for sure I wouldnt use a wish-granting item if I

came across one? Impeccably good Hanekawas situation may not
have been based on a wish any more than my spring break had, but
the ever-so-slight discord and distortion inside her had allowed her
to be enchanted by a cat.

My relationship with Shinobu was really no different from

Senjougaharas with the crab or Kanbarus with the demon.

I dont mind, Araragi-senpai.

You should mind. You have to mind. What are you talking about?
And what about Senjougahara? I want you and her to-

I dont care. I dont care about Senjougahara-senpai anymore.

Kanbaru had uttered those biting words.

Ive given up on her, so I dont care anymore.

Of course you care.

You cant just give up like that.

Didnt your mother leave you the demon mummy to tell you that
wishes are meant to be granted with your own power? It wasnt to
tell you to give up on your wish.

So dont give me that look.

Dont give me that deep cave-like look.

How can you say youve given up when youre on the verge of
tears?

The Rainy Devil was also a crybaby demon.

It had its origins in a child who got in a fight with his parents over
something stupid, ran away from home on a drizzly day, got lost in
the mountains, and was eaten by a pack of wild monkeys.
Strangely, no one in the village, not even the childs parents, could
remember the childs name.

Dammit!

Unable to mentally bear the stalemate and unable to bear my racing

thoughts that seemed to flash my life before my eyes, I ran toward
the raincoat. Including the previous night, this was my first time
making an attack instead of being on the receiving end. You could
say I couldnt stand the pressure of my stance any longer.

A standing position wasnt going to work. Even if I did restrain the

left arm, it would immediately send a kick my way. That meant I
had to tackle the raincoat while trying to hold down its entire body
like a pinning technique in judo or wrestling.

I spread my arms in order to grab the raincoats body, but I failed to

do so. I might have been able to respond if it had moved left or
right, but it did not. That said, it didnt duck down either. If it had, I
would only have needed to take a few more steps.

The raincoat jumped up.

It jumped to the classroom ceiling and planted its feet there. Then it
ran across the ceiling. I could hear the tah, tah, tah, tah, tah, tah of
its footsteps as it seemed to disobey gravity and ignore the law of
universal gravitation to run along the ceiling.

Then it dropped from the ceiling and landed on the floor.

Immediately, it jumped to the side.

Immediately, it landed on the blackboard that was about to fall

from the wall. Immediately, it jumped from there. Immediately, it
landed on the thick boards nailed to the window. Immediately, it
jumped from there. Immediately, it was back to the ceiling.

It moved in every direction and all the diagonals in between.

The raincoat jumped dizzyingly around.

Like a pinwheel firework, it used its legs to jump from wall to wall,
wall to ceiling, ceiling to floor, and floor to wall. The raincoat used
Kanbaru Surugas trained legs to jump around.

It reminded me of a super ball fired at high speed.

It was like a wild dance sent through a wild series of reflections.

Leap led into leap.

I couldnt follow it with my eyes anymore.

It was moving far faster than my eyeballs could move.

Like an object undergoing gravitational acceleration, acceleration

led into acceleration and its speed gradually, boldly, and noticeably
grew with each jump. Worrying about the difference between rain
boots and sneakers almost seemed silly now. My vision was
gradually, boldly, and noticeably overwhelmed.

Who would have thought a shift from two dimensions to three

could change things so drastically? Oshino had set up a barrier
around the classroom to ensure the damage would not spread and
to ensure this would be settled here. That had been based on the
simple idea that a narrow field would be better than a wide one
when up against this quick, nimble, and clever raincoat, but it had
had the opposite effect. It had completely come back to bite me.

How had I not realized this would happen?

Kanbaru had chosen basketball over track because she was faster
than anyone on the restricted field of the basketball court and she
could use her legs to their fullest there. Her height and her build
allowed her to easily make slam dunks, so I should have known
how her leg strength would be used in this limited space with a low
ceiling.

Everything I had done was coming back to bite me.

How many miscalculations could I make? Was I stupid?

I was making mistake after mistake.

Even as the raincoat jumped all around me, I could not move a step,
as if my heels were nailed to the floor. The hardest movements to
follow were the vertical ones from the floor to the ceiling or vice
versa. It was a design issue. The human eye was physically made to
move side to side, not up and down. My field of vision couldnt
keep up with the raincoat.

It circled around behind me.

From the ceiling, it finally leaped toward me. It rotated vertically in

midair like a rolling spike in Sepak Takraw and it used the force to
stab its claws into the top of my head. I could feel my skull being
crushed. By the time the force of impact caused me to pitch forward,
the raincoat had landed on the floor and sent a Muay Thai knee kick
into my jaw. The Sepak Takraw and Muay Thai combination only
had a few moments between, so it felt a lot like I was being
sandwiched between two simultaneous attacks and something
more than pain assaulted me. My head and the brain inside seemed
to have been crushed, so I lost consciousness for just a moment.

But I didnt die.

The wounds soon healed.

It truly was hell.

The Sajva hell to be exact.

That was one of Buddhisms Eight Greater Hells, in which one was
smashed to pieces but restored to normal with a gust of wind only
to be smashed again and restored again in an endless loop of eternal
torture. It really was my spring break all over again.
Tch

I reached out my handand the raincoat dodged it. When it raised

its left fist, I reacted. No, it wasnt a reaction. Only a reflex, really. I
had been so focused on that left arm that I had grown extra
sensitive to its movements. However, I should have thought more
carefully about the fact that it had just proactively sent two kicks
when I wasnt keeping it from using its left arm. I should also have
thought about the meaning of the dreadful footwork allowing it to
suddenly and dizzyingly move in three dimensions of confusing
acceleration. I should have thought about what it meant for it to use
its entire body and not just the Rainy Devils left arm.

Play with a devil and you too will become a devil.

The wish had not needed to be granted, she had not needed to sell
her soul, and it had not needed to hijack her body.

Make a wish to a demon, and you too will become a demon.

The left fist was a feint.

The raincoat had only used straight-line attacks before, but now it
had started using simple combat techniques like footwork,
combinations, and feints.

No, but it wasnt a feint.

It would better be called a fake.

This was a technique the raincoat could only pull off with Kanbaru
Surugas help.
While I focused on the left fist, my opposite side was an utter blind
spot, so the raincoats toes slammed into it three times in a row and
in the exact same spot each time. I doubled over from the raincoats
relativistically impossible attack which simultaneously hit me three
times in the exact same spot. At that moment, the sole of the other
foot slammed into my chest.

Like a catapult.

Unable to hold my ground, I collapsed backwards, but I placed my

hands on the floor like a handstand and quickly flipped back onto
my feet while putting some distance between us. The raincoat
quickly erased that distance.

A kick reached my lungs.

They had probably been crushed.

I had trouble breathing.

The damage did not immediately heal. That meant the raincoats
kick now had more force and destructive power behind it than the
left fist.

Kanbarus feelings had surpassed the demon.

Her jealousy.

Her hatred.

Her negative emotions.

The thought that it should have been her.

It

I spoke despite my crushed lungs.

It couldnt have been you, Kanbaru Suruga!

No one could replace someone else and no one could become

someone else. Senjougahara was Senjougahara Hitagi and Kanbaru
was Kanbaru Suruga.

Kanbaru and I were different.

One of us hadnt known Oshino and the other had.

One of us had backed off and the other hadnt.

One of us had been a monkey and the other had been a vampire.

It was nothing but chance and coincidence.

I could not rid myself of the guilt.

I felt guilty toward Kanbaru and toward Senjougahara. But that did
not mean I wished someone else could have done it for me. Nor did
it mean I was going to give up my current position.

Thats right.

If I was her hated rival in love, then she was my hated rival in love.
I needed to hate her.

Then was that one of the sources of my guilt?

I hadnt viewed Kanbaru as an equal.

I had looked down on her.

Underestimated her.

From a position of absolute safety and confidence, I had suggested

Kanbaru and Senjougahara make up and recover their old
relationship. How disgusting could I be? Just how kind and nice a
person was I? Just how cruel and awful a person was I?

Wishes were meant to be granted with ones own power.

On her own, she could have given up.

As long as she had not forgotten, she could have given up.

! ! !

The raincoat sent out surging attack after surging attack and each
one was powerful enough to transform the shape of my body. I
failed to dodge about one in four. The destroyed body parts were
automatically restored in order, but the raincoat continued the
barrage at an even quicker pace.

I suddenly realized I had been driven into the corner of the

classroom. I could not move back, right, or left, so I was essentially
bound by an invisible thread. At this point, the raincoat no longer
used any footwork. It kept its feet flat on the ground as if infighting
during boxing. It was incredibly one-sided infighting. I had held
some faint hope based in wishful thinking that even her high-
quality sneakers would have the soles burned and worn out by
friction if she kept up that ridiculous acceleration, but I now had to
rethink even that optimism. The fist, elbow, knee, shin, toes, heel,
and any combination of the above fiercely tortured my body in
rapid succession. This ultimate barrage did not even give me time to
scream.

It had left the category of physical blows.

It was now pure pressure.

I no longer escaped with just broken bones. The spots I was hit in
would break open and the skin and muscles would tear and burst.
The raincoat was likely bracing itself against the floor far better than
before, so its left fists power seemed to be growing and growing.

And yet, it still was not as powerful as Kanbaru Surugas legs.

Myuniform.

While my body was immortal, my clothing was not.

My clothes had long since been torn to shreds.

I had ruined yet another uninform.

They were quite expensive and it was still a few days until the
seasonal uniform change.

What excuse was I supposed to give my sisters this time?

Ghh

But at this range, if the raincoat showed even the slightest opening,
I could use that instant to seal its movements as if embracing
Kanbarus body. If I leaned all my weight on it and forced it onto
the floor, I could turn this all around.

I still had a chance.

I was only physically cornered, not situationally cornered. No
matter how much the raincoat attacked me, it wasnt worth fearing
as long as my healing power could keep up.

All it did was hurt.

Just like Kanbarus heart, all it did was hurt.

And pain meant you were still alive.

Hate!

I heard a voice.

Hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate!

It was Kanbaru Surugas voice.

The pleading voice came from the depths of the cave-like hood and
seemed to directly reverberate through my mind.

Hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate
hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate!

This hatred was far too much for a single person to hold.

This malice and hostility were the true negative feelings hidden
inside that positive underclassman.

It overflowed from the within the raincoat like a whirling

maelstrom.

The surface tension was at its limit.

How dare you how dare you how dare you how dare you how
dare you how dare you!

The voice continued with the blows.

That voice of hatred continued.

I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you I
hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you!

Im sorry, Kanbaru.

I spoke again.

I apologized to Kanbaru.

But I dont hate you.

She may have been my rival in love.

The two of us may have been horribly mismatched.

But couldnt we at least be friends?

A shrill voice, much like a scream, escaped the depths of that cave
and the raincoats kick pierced my stomach. It pierced straight
through. This went beyond ruptured organs. My joints and muscles
were completely ignored as its heel literally, truly, and impressively
pierced right through my gut, smashed my ribs and spine, and
reached the wall behind me.

This damage far exceeded my healing ability.

It slowly pulled the leg out.

I felt like my digestive organs were being pulled out with it.

And afterwards, my body had its own deep cave.

This cave was truly empty.

Kanbaru

This was bad.

With the giant hole in my stomach, the slightest twisting of my

body felt like it would tear my body into an upper and lower half.
That meant I couldnt take any careless actions. I was still conscious,
but the next attack would end it. I was completely worthless. Why
was I letting the raincoat overwhelm me? At this rate, Kanbarus
second wish would come true, even though I was supposed to
avoid that at all costs.

Or was that an option after all?

This was still just the second wish.

If Kanbaru could restrain herself from making a third wish, wasnt

this good enough? Her arm would return to normal and a wish was
a wish. She would surely find herself by Senjougaharas side in
some form or another to grant that wish.

I had no intention of giving up my position.

I had no intention of giving up my position.

But I did intend to forgive her.

And I should have died during spring break anyway, so, just as
Oshino had said, wouldnt that be the simplest option?

I had an attachment to life, but I had no fear of death.

Ahahh.

I groaned.

It simply let out a meaningless groan.

As if forced out during my death throes.

I wouldnt have to worry about ruining a uniform ever again.

KanbaruSuruga.

And at that moment, when a single instant seemed to last an

interminable half an hour, the raincoats barrage came to a stop.

It came to a sudden stop.

This was the opening I had been waiting for.

But I could not pin down the raincoat as I had planned. That was
partially because the hole in my stomach showed no sign of healing
and because my consciousness had faded too far for that, but it had
even more to do with how my body had frozen up.

I had frozen for likely the same reason as the raincoat.

You two certainly are enjoying yourselves.

The classroom door had opened.

That door could never be opened from within, but someone had
opened it from without.

And who was it that stepped inside?

Senjougahara Hitagi in her casual clothes.

You seem to be having quite a lot of fun without me, Araragi-kun.

I dont like it.

Her expression was emotionless and her voice flat.

She only narrowed her eyes a little upon seeing the carnage.

She always appeared without warning.

She wore jeans without a belt, innerwear of the same color, and a
largish hoodie. Her hair was also loosely tied back, so she looked
like she had left home without bothering to change.

S-Senjougahara

I couldnt speak very well with the hole in my gut, so I had

difficulty calling out to her in what barely qualified as a voice.

I wanted to ask why she was here.

But I knew the answer without asking. Oshino had obviously called
her here. What other answer could there be? But how? He didnt
have her contact information. She hated him, so she would never
give him her cellphone number. And she hadnt had a chance to
regardless.

Cellphone?
Oh, so thats it.

That bastard hadnt given the slightest thought to protecting

personal information, so he had completely ignored my privacy and
used my cellphone. My phone had been in the rucksack I had left
with him before entering the classroom, and it had not been
password locked, so even if he had trouble with electronics, he
would have been able to check the address book or call records
given enough time. Plus, he had received something of a lecture on
using a cellphone from Senjougahara on Mothers Day.

But why?

Why had Oshino called Senjougahara here of all places in this of all
situations?

Suddenly, the raincoat jumped backwards, jumped off the ceiling

and walls two or three times each, and moved from corner to corner
to reach the exact opposite end of the classroom from me.

Why?

It was only one attack away from winning.

It would have granted the wish.

Had Senjougaharas appearance caused Kanbaru Surugas

conscious mind to temporarily restrain the subconscious mind
controlling the raincoat? Was that why Oshino had called her here?
But that was only a temporary measure. The Rainy Devil fed on
peoples negative emotions, so nothing would change if those
emotions werent dealt with. We couldnt solve everything with the
power of love like some old foreign movie. If youre going to call
Senjougahara, then come help yourself, Oshino Meme!
But Senjougahara showed no interest whatsoever in what the
raincoat was doing. Her cold eyes stared straight at me as I lay there
nearly on the verge of death. They were the eyes of a hawk eyeing
its prey.

Araragi-kun. You lied to me.

Eh?

You tricked me, saying you ran into a telephone pole, and you
kept Kanbaru a secret from me. When we started dating, didnt we
promise not to do that? Didnt we promise not to keep any secrets
from each other at least when related to Oddities?

Oh, um

That may have been true and it wasnt like I had forgotten.

That warrants ten thousand deaths.

She gave a cruel smile.

All of the fear I had not felt when being pummeled by the raincoat
suddenly raced through my body like a jolt of electricity. I was
afraidseriously afraid of this girl. Was she Medusa? How could
anyone look at another person like that? Not to mention their own
boyfriend. And was she serious? Was that really what she should be
telling me right now? Could she not at all tell what was going on
here?

But, well, it looks like you already died about ten thousand times.

With the door still open, she began walking toward me where I was
curled up in the corner.
Perhaps I should forgive you just this once.

Wait.

I really dont think Ive died ten thousand times.

The raincoat reacted to her movement and began running toward

me. By chance, they began the race between Senjougahara Hitagi
and Kanbaru Suruga that had not happened during their middle
school days. Purely looking at the distance, the raincoat was over
twice as far away from me as Senjougahara, but even if
Senjougahara had been the ace of the track team, she had a gap of
over two years. Plus, the raincoat was borrowing Kanbarus
powerno, it had become a demon itself. The first to arrive at my
unmoving position was of course Kanbaru.

It raised its left fist to take this chance and get in the finishing blow.
But at that moment, Senjougahara belatedly arrived and cut in
between the raincoat and me.

I did not even have time to realize she was in danger.

Just before the blow landed, the raincoat was knocked backwards.
Knocked backwards? Who had done that? I couldnt have done it
and Senjougahara was even less able. In that case, it hadnt actually
been knocked back. It had most likely jumped back of its own
accord. Even if that meant awkwardly falling backwards
afterwards.

I was left speechless.

It had almost seemed like the raincoat was afraid of getting

Senjougahara wrapped up in this and like it wanted to avoid
harming her more than anything else. What was the meaning of that
unnatural action?

Was Kanbaru Surugas conscious mind really taking over? No.

This wouldnt be that convenient.

Oddities were logical.

There had to be some logical explanation somewhere.

It was just that the logic was not always apparent to humans.

But in that case

Araragi-kun. Knowing you, you were stupidly thinking of solving

all of this with your own death, werent you?

Senjougahara still paid the raincoat no heed and spoke to me. She
had her back to me and she did not look my way, but it was obvious
that was not because she was hesitant to look at my tragically
bloody and injured state.

What a joke. Shallow self-sacrifice is not called for here in the

slightest. If you died, I would obviously use any means necessary to
kill Kanbaru. Didnt I tell you that? Are you planning to make me a
murderer, Araragi-kun?

She had seen straight through me.

Honestly, what a compassionate girl.

Now I couldnt carelessly let myself die.

Her love was so twisted it became earnestly straightforward.

What I like the least about this is that it tells me you would do this
exact same thing even if you did not have that body of yours. If you
want to do these ridiculous things while fully relying on your
immortal body, then go right ahead, but if you start turning in that
direction out of habit and end up like this as a result, then I do not
like it one bit.

Then again, if its coming from you, unwanted help, an unasked-

for intrusion, and an unwelcome favor might not be all that bad.

To the end, Senjougahara did not so much as glance my way and

she took a single step toward the raincoat as it struggled to stand
back up. It crawled backwards as if afraid of her.

It seemed afraid of her.

It seemed afraid of herbut why?

Once I started thinking about it, I realized the previous night had
been the same. The raincoat had suddenly vanished after knocking
me away. That had been due to Senjougaharas appearance with my
forgotten envelope, but why was that a reason for it to flee? Now
that I thought about it, that was unnatural. If it had been a human
attacker or human murderer, it was perfectly natural, but an Oddity
didnt need to worry about witnesses. And with the power of that
left arm, Senjougahara alone wouldnt be much of an obstacle.

Then why had it fled?

Because it had been Senjougahara?

But why?
Was it really the power of love?

Were Kanbaru Surugas feelings for Senjougahara conveniently

enough to overpower the demon? Were her earnest feelings enough
brush aside an Oddity, which was the world itself, and to reach
heaven from earth?

No.

That wasnt it. But it had been her feelings.

Even after Kanbaru had made her second wish to the Rainy Devils
left hand and had her left hand transform into that bestial one, it
had taken four days for it to activate. That was because she had just
barely restrained her feelings of hatred toward me. She had
restrained the demons violence using her stance of making wishes
come true with her own power. Oshino had mocked that stance
which she had kept for the seven years since making the first wish,
but he had not meant it in such a superficial way.

He had called it laughable, but he had also said she had not been
entirely wrong.

Kanbarus feelings.

Kanbaru Surugas wish.

The Rainy Devil saw through to and revealed peoples dark

emotions. It read and viewed the hidden side. The demon saw the
hidden side of peoples wishes. She had wanted to be faster because
she had hated her classmates. She had wanted to be by
Senjougaharas side because she had hated Araragi Koyomi.

But that was only the hidden side.

Every wish had a hidden side.

But if there was a hidden side, there was an unhidden side.

If the Rainy Devil harmed Senjougahara Hitagi, Kanbarus unhidden

wish would not come true regardless of whether she killed me, the
target of her hatred. This wasnt some moving and sentimental
issue concerning the power of love. It was a more realistic and
primitive issue.

This was a contract.

It was a deal.

The Rainy Devil only granted the hidden wish, but that did not
mean it neglected the unhidden side. In elementary school, the
demon had granted her hidden wish to take revenge on her
classmates, but she had also ultimately granted her unhidden wish
of becoming faster. When ignoring the causal relationship, it really
had come true. It was laughable because doing so had only been
playing into the Rainy Devils hand. The Rainy Devil had only read
the hidden behind the unhidden, but it had not found that hidden
wish in isolation. The hidden only existed because the unhidden
existed. And if Oshino was telling the truth, then the left hand did
not have a will of its own. It all came down to what Kanbaru Suruga
subconsciously wanted. The hidden and unhidden should never
have been able to coincide, but that causal contradiction had been
achieved.

A contract with a demon.

In exchange for her soul.

A cooling-off period.
Wishing for an impossible wish.

The dilemma of a double bind.

The dilemma of the hidden and unhidden.

That was why the Rainy Devil had been unable to lay a hand on
Senjougahara. That was what the contract said, what the deal said,
so as long as she was acting as my shield, it could not lay a hand on
me no matter how much Kanbaru hated me.

It could not lay that left hand on me.

Having me overwhelm the demon and thus making it impossible to

fulfill the hidden was one strategy, so making it impossible to fulfill
the unhidden wish would work just as well.

And just now, Senjougahara had sworn before the demons eyes
that she would kill Kanbaru if I died. The Rainy Devil could not
claim it did not know, so that clinched it.

He had seen through it all.

He had seen through it all even more than the demon.

Oshino, youyou really are a far, far more cruel and awful person
than I am!

Its been a while, Kanbaru, said Senjougahara. I am glad to see

you are doing well.

As the raincoatno, as her old friend Kanbaru Suruga crawled

backwards on her back, Senjougahara slowly leaned over her and
pinned her down.
She had done what I hadnt managed even when trying so hard I
was left in this sad state.

It was something I could never have done.

She squeezed the bestial left hand and the human right hand as if to
comfort it.

Did she pull out her stapler?

No, she no longer carried it with her.

Senjougahara-senpai.

A pleading whisper escaped the hood.

However, that hood was no longer a deep cave. The face there was
not on the verge of tears. No, not on the verge. It was covered in
tears. I clearly saw a girls smiling and teary face.

I she sobbed.

She put her feelings to words.

I love you.

She put her wish to words.

I see. I do not particularly love you.

Senjougahara flatly and bluntly spoke her mind in her usual tone of
voice.

But will you still stay by my side?

Sorry for making you wait so long.

Her voice was so very flat as she said that.

How foolish.

Nothing could have been more foolish.

Honestly, I really was just set up to lose, wasnt I?

And as always, Id put on a comedy act. It was almost impressive

how useless I had been.

I was a good boy who knew when to say I was sorry.

I had long since known just how greedy a girl Senjougahara Hitagi
was. I had long since known just how much she disliked giving up.

If it was something truly important, she would never give up on it.

It was unwanted help, an unasked-for intrusion, and an unwelcome

favor.

But, well, I was still amazed at just how much of a contrarian every
last one of us was.

We all had our hidden sides and our unhidden sides.

And those two sides were one and the same, like a Mobius strip.

So interpreting this as the power of love was perfectly fine.

After all, being forgotten was pretty depressing.

While thinking about that and waiting for the giant hole in my gut
to heal, I simply watched the yuri scene developing before my eyes
without making any crass comments. If I was Oshino, I probably
would have put on a nihilistic act that didnt suit me, held an unlit
cigarette in my mouth, and asked the two of them if something
good had happened, but unfortunately, I was a minor.

009

You could call this the epilogue or the ending of the story.

The following day, my two sisters, Karen and Tsukihi, woke me up

like usual. As I rubbed my sleepy eyes, I started toward
Senjougaharas house for the promised study group that would last
all Sunday. I was in a good mood as I held a faint hope that she
would feed me some of her cooking this time. Just as I climbed
aboard the bicycle I usually rode to school (which was now my one
and only machine) and left the front gate, I met a girl who
apparently had nothing better to do than perform stretches in front
of a telephone pole. She was wearing casual clothes, but the short
pleated skirt and the bike shorts sticking out provided the exact
same impression as the uniform usually worn by Kanbaru Suruga,
my underclassman and the star of Naoetsu High School.

Good morning, Araragi-senpai.

Good morning to you too, Kanbaru-san.

Oh, I appreciate the polite greeting. When youre so polite and

courteous, it makes you feel like a superior human being compared
to the likes of me. Are your injuries okay?
YesThe sunlight is a little harsh right now, but it isnt anything
worth worrying about. I recovered from all the damage and now
Im doing just fine. Now, why do you know where my house is,
Kanbaru?

Come on, Araragi-senpai, you know perfectly well why. Or are

you giving me a chance to show off? I was stalking you, so of course
Id located your home address.

I wasnt quite sure what to say when she said that with such a
cheerful smile.

So what do you want?

Well, Senjougahara-senpai called me this morning and asked me to

come pick you up. Oh, let me carry your bag.

Before I could say anything, she snatched my rucksack from my

bikes front basket and held it in her left hand.

I also oiled that bicycles chain, she told me with an innocent

smile. If you have anything else for me to do, feel free to ask.

She had gone straight past friend and reached gofer.

I had no intention of letting the schools star follow me around

doing my bidding, but if that unhealthily jealous Senjougahara was
letting Kanbaru play this sort of role, would I be reading too much
into it to think the two of them had mended their relationship and
recreated the Valhalla Combo? Yes, it probably was reading too
much into it.
How about a massage before heading out? You might say youre
fine, but you have to be exhausted. I give a pretty good massage,
you know?

What about basketball? Dont you have practice on Sundays too?

We need to start studying for exams soon, so you need to focus
while you can.

Well, I cant play basketball anymore.

Eh?

Its a little early, but Ive retired.

She held her left hand in front of me while still holding my

rucksack. That arm was wrapped in white bandages all the way up
to the elbow. Even through the bandages, I could tell its length and
shape were a little off.

There wasnt a clean ending to it all. The demon left, but my arm
didnt go back to normal. And I cant exactly play basketball with
my arm like this. Still, its pretty powerful and convenient.

Give my bag back right this instant.

How should I put it?

Her wish had been granted, even if only halfway.

So this may have been the natural price to pay.

 Afterword

Sometimes, I actually feel like writing a normal afterword, so I think

Ill give some commentary on the three stories contained in this
book. Since this will touch on a lot of what happens in the stories, I
apologize to anyone who wants to read the afterword before
finishing the actual book, but I recommend you stop right here and
read the book first. Then again, all I really wanted to write was that
boilerplate warning and Im not actually going to give any kind of
commentary. But now that I think about it, commentary by the
author isnt as simple as it sounds. People cant express what
theyre thinking with 100% accuracy and less than 100% of what is
expressed is going to get through to whoever reads it. Even at the
best of times, its probably only 60% on both counts, so only 36% of
what the author was thinking is going to be conveyed to the reader.
The remaining 64% is a misunderstanding, so it isnt uncommon to
find yourself disagreeing with more than half of what an author
says in their commentary. You think, Eh? Thats what you were
going for? This comes down to the difficulty of communication,
but that misunderstanding does spice things up nicely. For
example, when I recommend someone a book I love, I might tell all
about this scene that really moved me, but sometimes when I go
back and reread the book, I find that scene doesnt exist. Humans
are such careless creatures, so whenever we feel something, over
half of it as a complete misunderstanding. But perhaps we
shouldnt interpret that in a negative way. Perhaps we should see it
as that author or story having the power to give the reader that kind
of misunderstanding. Im sure any reader has reread a book that
really shocked them long ago and found that it really wasnt
anything worth getting worked up over. And Im sure everyone has
recommended a current teenager a book we loved in our teens and
told them theyre sure to love it, only to find they didnt love it.
Thats the misunderstanding or our imagination at play. Instead of
being disappointed, perhaps we should thank it for letting us dream
like that. Also, there have been times when I reread a book, didnt
find the moving scene I remembered, and later discovered that
scene in a different book altogether. In that case, its entirely a
problem with my memory, so the author and story arent
responsible at all. This book might seem like three stories centered
on Odditiesbut its not. These are three stories I wrote because I
wanted to write an enjoyable novel filled with silly conversations.
When they were being gathered in this book, I asked VOFAN-san to
do the illustrations. For one piece of commentary, this story was
born of the following syllogism: Tsundere sounds a little like
Gelnde, doesnt it? Gelnde makes me think of Bogen[19].
Written in kanji, Bogen would mean verbal abuse. And thats
what led to Hitagi Crab, Mayoi Snail, and Suruga Monkey for
Bakemonogatari 1. Part 2 will have even more silly conversations,
so look forward to it.

100% of my thanks goes out to everyone except for me.

-Nisio Isin
 Translator's Notes

1. It was a mythical battlefield between the gods of Mt. Nantai

and those of Mt. Akagi[1]
2. "Public works" is written (soil + tree)
The name "Hitagi" in kanji can only be written as
(fertilizer + field + tree)
By the way, the name of Bakemonogatari's character is
written in hiragana, therefore it has no meaning associated
3. Means "Bus Gas Explosion".
4. A Japanese game in which someone is asked to say a word
repeatedly and is then asked a simple question that they will
often get wrong due to a close-but-not-quite-right answer
being very similar to the word repeated.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9. Means "Without climax, without resolution, with profound
meaning".
10. An author who wrote a book called "Sorekara" which is what
Hanekawa kept saying.
11. The kanji of Mayoi mean True Dusk.
12. Najimu is Japanese for "to grow accustomed to".
13. Next = . Sheep = . Jealous = .
14. The correct version is Namamugi Namagome Namatamago
which means "Raw Wheat, Raw Rice, Raw Egg".
15. "Hotto" can mean both "hot" or "relief".
16. This is the improved version of moe she came up with in part
002.
17. "I caught a glimpse" = "Kaimamita" and "I stututtered" =
"Kamimamita".
 18. The "Kan" of Kanbaru means god and the "Senjou" of
Senjougahara means battlefield.
19. Both are German words that the Japanese use in the context
of skiing.

Bakemonogatari Volume 1 /
Author: NisiOisiN
Illustrator: VOFAN
Translators: velocity7, Kerrichan, LiTTleDRAgo, Omimon, Js06
PDF: Evoeden