Straube, Toxic Bodies - Ticks, Trans Bodies, and The Ethics of Response-Ability in Art and Activist Writing
Straube, Toxic Bodies - Ticks, Trans Bodies, and The Ethics of Response-Ability in Art and Activist Writing
Straube, Toxic Bodies - Ticks, Trans Bodies, and The Ethics of Response-Ability in Art and Activist Writing
WIBKE STRAUBE
Centre for Gender Studies, Karlstad University, Sweden
Abstract Tracing ticks in two different artworks and Leslie Feinberg’s activist writing, Wibke
Straube takes their lead in this article from philosopher Donna Haraway and her suggestion
to think about engagement with the environment through an “ethics of response-ability.” By
deploying close readings, Straube discusses the affects represented in the video installation
Act on Instinct (2013) by Elin Magnusson, a sequence of the film Something Must Break (2014) by
Ester Martin Bergsmark, and blog entries from the “Lyme Series” by the late trans activist Le-
slie Feinberg. Through these works, Straube explores the meaning of this correlation be-
tween ticks and transing bodies for environmental ethics as well as for the forging of livable
lives for trans people. Toxicity surfaces as a link in these works. The notion of feminist figu-
ration, developed by philosopher Rosi Braidotti among others, allows Straube to discuss tox-
icity as a material-discursive figuration, which highlights how human societies in a Western
context approach the body of the Other, in this case the transgender body as a human Other
and the tick as animal Other. As a figuration, toxicity then becomes a shared meeting site
that helps to problematize the Western pathologization of trans bodies and asks what ethics
emerge in this proximity between ticks and trans bodies. Toxicity exists in the discussed
works in particular as a complex material-discursive trajectory. Although some discourses
on toxicity uphold social hierarchies and racist assumptions, as illustrated by Mel Y. Chen,
for example, the works here seem to reappropriate the status of the toxic body as a strategy
for adjustment and alliance and a site of ethical engagement with the world. The tick is
Straube’s guide in weaving together stories of different bodies and of what Deborah Bird
Rose and Thom van Dooren call the “unloved other.”
Toxic Bodies
1. Bendorf, “Nature”; Seymour, “Trans Ecology and the Transgender Road Narrative”; Straube, “Posthu-
man Ecological Intimacy.”
2. Stryker, Currah, and Moore, “Trans-, Trans, or Transgender?” 13.
3. Enke, “Introduction,” 5.
4. Stryker, Currah, and Moore, “Trans-, Trans, or Transgender?” 13.
5. Bettcher, “Feminist Perspectives on Trans Issues.”
scapularis, I. ricinus (also called the deer tick), and I. persulcatus are the vectors of Lyme
disease. The illness is transmitted during a tick of the Ixodes family’s blood feeding—in
Europe mostly I. ricinus, and to a lesser extent I. persulcatus.12 Lyme disease caused by
the Borrelia burgdorferi bacteria and the viral infection tick-borne encephalitis (TBE) are
the most commonly known ailments transmitted by ticks; other illnesses include ehrli-
chia, babesia, anaplasmosis, bartonella, rocky mountain spotted fever, borrelia iones-
tari, and several other recently emerging diseases caused by viruses, bacteria, protozoa,
and nematodes.13 All infections occur during the tick’s feeding: the tick’s retractable
mouthparts, which the tick sinks into the body of its host, are adapted for piercing skin
and sucking blood.14 For one to three days, the tick stays strongly attached to feed on
the host’s blood, lymph, and digested tissue.15 If the tick is infected—and here it is
important to remember, it often also isn’t—the multiple days of exchange between the
pathogens in the tick’s stomach and the host’s blood flow can lead to infections.16
The artworks and activist writing that I discuss in this article all address trans
and tick bodies through the emotions they incite as well as the ethical practices that
are drawn from the meeting of these bodies. In this context, the material urges me to
ponder the coming together of these two disparate bodies, ticks and human trans bod-
ies, and the material-discursive framing of both as parasitic. According to cultural stud-
ies and critical race studies scholar Neel Ahuja, the homosexual body—and thus also
the trans body—presents an “old metaphor for the parasite itself.”17 In this metaphor,
racist, homophobic, and transphobic logics intertwine. This historical association of
the term parasite with queer and trans bodies links to race, sexuality, gender, class,
health, and ability. In this clearly trans- and homophobic as well as racist analogy, the
use of the term parasite requires even further explanation. Parasites are host-dependent
organisms that can infect their host with diseases.18 Clearly, in a Western context, trans
and queer people, especially trans people of color, despite their hateful rendering as
“parasitic,” are not the predator but all too often the victim of hate crimes and social
marginalization. In the metaphorical use of parasite, “genocidal, fascistic, and xenopho-
bic logics” resonate.19
Hence, the trans body, rendered as parasitic, is framed as a threat to cisheteronor-
mative future generations via genetic contamination. Such a problematic interpretation
receptive mode in regard to the Other.26 It entertains an ethics that regards subjectivity
beyond the imaginary of the Cartesian subject as independent and autonomous. In-
stead, it features a subject of interdependence, co-relationality, and permeability—thus
a posthuman subject that sees itself embedded within a multispecies world rather
than as the emperor of unruly nature. As an ethical mode, it is something like a practice
guide for an alternative form of relating. It asks how different animals—humans and
other animals—meet, and how, what, and who they can become in this encounter.
There is response, not just reaction, in the encounter between the animal and the
human. How do ticks and trans bodies encounter each other here and how do they
respond?
I would like to suggest in this article that this encounter between these two bodily
entities, ticks and trans bodies, invites consideration of the unloved Other—the one
that seems disposable, possibly even killable. I also contemplate a posthuman alliance
that steps in where there is a lack of support and cooperation within the human con-
text. In a society in which trans bodies are routinely dismissed, killed, and uncared for,
the tick’s response might be an invitation into a new, toxic sociality. This is not a cozy
intimacy with a furry animal companion but a queer sociality between two unloved
Others.27 According to Haraway, response happens between kin.28 The relationality be-
tween two toxic bodies draws attention to the lack of care for unloved Others and the
potential to change this.
Discussing the human body in proximity to the animal is a tricky endeavour. The
human has often been aligned with the animal in order to dehumanize it and to justify
violence against human minority bodies. The need for rethinking the proximity of ani-
mal and human bodies has for instance been discussed in the special issue of Angelaki,
edited by Eliza Steinbock, Marianna Szczygielska, and Anthony Wagner.29 The authors
interrogate here the problematics of “animacy hierarchies” and question how human-
ness and animality are constructed through particular linkages with the non-human
Other.30 To follow trans studies scholar Abraham Weil’s article in the same issue, the
dehumanization of the human body opens up an explicit connection between blackness
and transness. 31 Yet, it can also, as Weil insists, “serve to rearrange the human.”32 Con-
sequently, it is a central aim of this article to inquire how the animal in proximity to the
human body, joined in the toxic sociality of the unloved Others, contests racist and anti-
Semitic logics instead of feeding them. In the concept of the unloved Other I suggest to
see a potential for both human and animal bodies to create livable worlds beyond the
world that has excluded and neglected them. I will return to the complexity of this dis-
cussion in my discussion of two artworks and Feinberg’s activist writing.
Inspired by queer/feminist artist and art historian Renate Lorenz as well as philos-
opher Antke Engel, in this article I “quarrel about the toxic as a means of queering sub-
jectivity and sociality,”33 which also resonates with Mel Y. Chen’s approach to the hurt-
ful “antisocial” aspects of toxicity and the potential of finding new relations, “extant
socialities,” in learning to live with the things and life forms that are toxic.34 Coming
back to quarreling, to quarrel also means to relate and to form a response. As a toxic
material-discursive storyteller, the tick responds in my material by showing me differ-
ent possible contact zones with other toxic bodies that connect in odd and unexpected
ways. I engage here with the notion of toxicity as a feminist figuration. It thereby
becomes more than the everyday discourse on toxicity. Conventionally understood,
toxicity is a poison that harms organisms—humans, animals, and more broadly the
environment. Parasites do the same, specifically to other organisms.35 Their pathogens
act as toxic substances to the host body.
According to Braidotti, a feminist figuration presents a “cartographic map of
power-relations and thus can also help identify possible sites and strategies of resis-
tance.”36 It is, as Braidotti emphasizes, “a political fiction”37 that carries its past and its
present into a future of rethinking the formations of subjectivity, bodies, reason, and
emotion. Toxicity as a feminist figuration, then, can be read as a phenomenon that
delivers its history of contamination and impurity into the present and future practices
of conceptual and material resistances, reappropriations, denormalizations, and refor-
mulations. Toxicity as a feminist figuration is removed from its literal meaning. The no-
tion of toxicity performs a tightrope walk between a reappropriated meaning of toxicity
as a “near-metaphor”—different from Braidotti’s definitions of figuration—but also as a
material entity in how it has shaped certain bodies, and how these bodies have suffered
and continue to experience violence against themselves, as they are bound by stigma.
Toxicity is, in this article, metaphor as well as matter, in its historical meaning as well
as in its potential to carve out future spaces for those bodies rendered toxic, unloved,
polluting, and parasitic.
Finally, by exploring the connection between ticks and trans bodies, I build on pre-
vious work that has discussed the tick in the context of posthumanities. Central
discussions include the engagement with kinship and faith in ticks by environmental
philosopher James Hatley as well as cultural geographer Jacob Bull’s consideration of
ticks as noncharismatic animals beyond the “geographies of the nearby,” as he calls
the complex structures that tie certain animals to humans.38 Although their work is
vital to my understanding of ticks, I shift my emphasis by specifically discussing trans
bodies in contact with ticks. I do this in order to consider the significance of the meeting
between ticks and trans bodies and what this can entail for trans and/or queer bodies in
a posthuman future, trans-livability, and queer world-making.
38. Bull, “Between Ticks and People”; Hatley, “Blood Intimacies and Biodicy.”
early morning fog in a damp forest clearing; it drags along a bundle of stuffed animals—
six tiny deer the size of the deer’s hooves—from strings attached to its wrist. The
heightened orchestration of environmental sounds complements the scenery: the gur-
gling of a stream, wind in the trees, accompanied by a soundtrack of calm acoustic gui-
tar music.
While the accompanying synopsis of this video on Magnusson’s website describes
the artist’s questions around parenthood, the film leaves space for a wider reading into
the realm of queer kinship and response-ability for and within this formation.39 In her
voice-over, which is audible throughout most of the film, the artist discusses appropri-
ate handling of the tick. She refers to the tick as an animal that seems to bite her out of
love but that she doesn’t love back. Big animals should take care of smaller ones, she
says. Someone has told her that. But she continues to wonder, must she really care for
a small, bloodthirsty animal that hurts her? Long shots of the forest supplement these
reflections; the trans-species deer/human drags the tiny deer along, meanders over
rocks, meadows, and forested hills. In the voice-over, the artist reflects, “When the
ticks bite me I feel tenderness for them at first. They love me, I can tell, so why not love
them right back? But in the end I get angry however, and kill them. Why should I let
something that bites me live? You say that larger animals should take care of smaller
ones and this everyone knows. However if the small ones behave badly I think this
ought to be up for discussion.”40 These ethical considerations are closely connected to
Magnusson’s feelings toward the ticks. Feelings such as love, but also anger, feed her
concerns until the question arises about consequences for these potentially attacking
small creatures. The big deer continues to play tenderly with the tiny deer, tying them
to birch trees, dipping them in a cold stream, or stroking their fur. Kindness, tentative
rejection, and playful aggression alternate with an ambivalent feeling about the fellow-
ship of the tiny deer, seemingly echoing Magnusson’s conflicting feelings about the
ticks. Just like the tiny deer, the ticks seem to need the big one, wanting to be close to it
but also needing to take something from it that the big deer is not willing to give.
The big deer’s interaction with the tiny deer reflects on response and response-
ability in relation to others—smaller animals—and how this is also always up for discus-
sion, to the point of asking what is ethical when facing a contagious animal that “behaves
badly,” as the artist argues in the voice-over. In Haraway’s discussion on response-
ability, she explores the concept of killability.41 She proposes killing as a “constitutive
part of interspecies relationality”—one cannot avoid killing.42 To follow Haraway further,
“there is no way of living that is not also a way of someone, not just something, else
dying differentially.”43 Killability is not a unidirectional concept—the one who kills can
39. Parts of the video are accessible on the artist’s website: www.elinmagnusson.com/act-on-instinct/
(accessed January 16, 2019).
40. The voice-over language is Swedish. The English quote is based on the video’s embedded subtitles.
41. Haraway, When Species Meet, 80.
42. Mehrabi, Making Death Matter, 152, in reference to Haraway, When Species Meet, 81.
43. Haraway, When Species Meet, 80.
always also be killed. It is a matter of ethical reflection to consider this rather than to
normalize it. The tick itself is one of the best illustrations of this fact.
In a recent study, feminist science and technology scholar Tara Mehrabi calls killa-
bility a story about “agential asymmetries.”44 Her discussion focuses on the ethics of
killing fruit flies in Alzheimer’s research laboratories; by investigating how different ani-
mals and organisms become killable differently, she argues for the fly as a material and
discursive marker of boundaries.45 The tick is a similar boundary-disrupting figure.
Mehrabi’s explorations of fruit flies in the lab enable the question of what kind of ethics
are involved when killing small yet tormenting animals. Ticks evoke fear and disgust
and, apart from the artist’s brief affection, seldom compassion. The tick is an easily
killed, unloved Other. According to Neel Ahuja in his research on mosquitos, the small
body becomes a predator of the human, “forcing strange ecologies of attraction and feel-
ing even as it poses risks of debility and death.”46 Like mosquitos, ticks attack, out of
love, hunger, or simply existential survival. However, while they might carry diseases,
they also evoke a range of feelings: disgust, fear, and irritation in particular. Echoing
Hatley, I wonder why these creatures can’t just be extinct.47
For my whole life I have been fairly afraid of tick bites. Our dog always carried ticks
inside the house, yet I played unprotected by insect repellents in the garden, the forests,
and surrounding fields throughout my childhood. Strangely, I was never bitten, not until
I was in my early thirties and a very small tick in a friend’s garden on an early spring
morning in Tuscany found its way into the space between my toes. It did not linger. Its
sharp teeth broke the skin immediately. I felt its bite like a needle. Disgusted and full of
fear of one of those unluckily infected ticks, I removed the small critter. The rest of our
week there I spent in long pants snugly tucked into my socks. Though ticks never keep
me out of the forest, they do keep me from inviting the neighbor’s cat into my kitchen.
She always leaves a few small hungry ones crawling on the floor. I guess they know
that the warmth inside the house is an indicator of an abundance of food—a much big-
ger and possibly tastier host body than the skinny cat.
I have a hard time feeling empathy for ticks, and mostly sense a strong aversion
even when only writing about them. To follow my argument of toxic alliances between
different human and nonhuman unloved Others, I want to emphasize here that, even
though I consider ticks as toxic companions to my own genderqueer self, I feel no sym-
pathy for them. Even though I am interested in the tick’s toxic rendering, I remain hos-
tile toward the animal itself. Writing about ticks in this article is in itself a peculiarly
affective experience infused by disgust—the act of doing research on this arthropod
means looking at a range of images of ticks crawling on human skin (interestlingly
mostly white skin, which is a question in itself ) or being held between tweezers for a
close-up camera shot, altogether a challenge in dealing with my dislike of this creature.
Bull explains that the affective reaction of disgust might be enhanced by the delay be-
tween the bite and its discovery, which also builds on the fact of proximity. It is the
“horror of being brought into intimate contact with what is considered to be another
category of being.”48 Ticks certainly are “another category.” Humans are constantly try-
ing to environmentally, ecologically, taxonomically, and bodily distance themselves
from ticks.49 The tick bites its way through human skin and clings to the surface with-
out falling (or being easily wiped) off, causing irritation and disgust. Removing a tick is
a complicated and risky task. They cling to the flesh as if it is a matter of life or death—
and it is. And that is exactly what it can be to the human as well. When removing the
ticks from our skin, we have to be careful not to upset them too much, or they threaten
to eject their stomach contents into our bloodstream: free-floating Borrelia bacteria and
other pathogens might infect our bodies and make us sick in unforeseeable ways,50 some-
times irreversible and untreatable, depending on one’s financial means for long-term
antibiotic treatment; access to experienced, unbiased medical doctors; and the antibiotic
resistance of the bacteria.51 Yet, of course, not all ticks are infected or, even if carrying
human pathogens, able to transmit their pathogens to the host’s body. For the human or
bitten animal the effects are a question of luck or of finding and removing the tick in time.
Coming back to ethics, it is in this moment when the tick becomes irritating that
Elin Magnusson asks, “Why should I let something that bites me live?” In a commentary
on Haraway’s When Species Meet, cultural geographers Jamie Lorimer and Gail Davies
ask, how should “we live with others who are not at all like us, and might actively dis-
like us?” How to extend our ethics to “pesky, monstrous, or bacterial companions?”52
The reflection of the artist on the need to relate or not means the acknowledgment of
something—the life of something or someone—which requires relating as well as
knowing how to respond to something that is Other. It is difficult to relate sympatheti-
cally to ticks. Yet, how they emerge in the material discussed here happens exactly
through a kind of sympathy, namely, love. Additionally, the artist’s considerations
draw a connection between these two contaminated, or possibly contaminating, bodies:
the human trans body and the arthropod body of the tick. This connection is not always
hateful or instilled with disgust, but possibly also involves a relation, or a relating, to the
Other. I will investigate this connection further in the discussion of the next artwork.
The film tells the story of Ellie’s emancipation from her love for Andreas, whose reac-
tions to her trans-feminine and/or non-binary position are unaccepting and transpho-
bic.53 Nevertheless, neither of these characters fully fits into mainstream, cishetero
norms—not Ellie as a white, working-class, trans-feminine or possibly also non-binary
person, nor Andreas, with his anarchist, androgynous punk style, the mascara he
wears, the earrings, and his gentle attitude that defies most forms of Western hetero-
masculinity. Their budding romance and eventual difficult separation are set in Stock-
holm’s suburban, semi-industrial wastelands, overgrown by weeds, scattered malls,
highway ramps—a landscape far from the touristic image of Sweden’s forests and
lakes and the vigorous urbanity of the metropole.
Something Must Break is director Ester Martin Bergsmark’s debut feature-length fic-
tion film. It is the first European film by a trans and non-binary identifying filmmaking
team and cast to be widely screened and recognized with film awards. Saga Becker, the
main actress, is also the first trans actress in Sweden to have won the national award
for Best Female Actress, the Guldbagge, in 2015. The script is written by Ester Martin
Bergsmark and Eli Levén. Levén’s semi-autobiographical book Du är rötterna som sover
vid mina fötter och håller jorden på plats (You Are the Roots that Sleep beneath My Feet and
Keep the Earth in Its Place) provides the foundation for the film’s script.
The tick guides me in the first part of the film to a short sequence of tentative
seduction (figs. 2 and 3). The two protagonists are resting on the bed, tired from a long
night roaming the city. It was their first date. They had started the night by cruising
older gay men to get free drinks. Later they had strolled through Stockholm’s harbor,
deserted construction sites, and quiet roads. They end up spending the dawn hours
lying on a curved, overgrown slide in an unkept and long-forgotten amusement park
somewhere in Stockholm, smoking cigarettes. Back home in the morning, while the
53. The character Ellie/Sebastian is coming out as Ellie in the film but is mostly addressed using male pro-
nouns. However, Ellie’s wish to become truly “Ellie,” explicitly stated in the film, led to my decision to use “she” in
order to do justice to this movement. In another article I might choose to do this differently.
sun is flooding in through big windows, Andreas asks Ellie, “What if we have ticks?” She
promptly challenges him to check. Ellie takes off her shirt and lies back on the bed,
wearing only briefs, to let Andreas begin his search for the unwanted guests. He starts
to investigate the place between her toes—“they like it there”—gliding his hands
searchingly up her legs. He quietly asks if he can take off her underwear. She nods; her
body naked, a flat chest, shaved pubic hair. Ellie’s genitals, limp on her belly, are ten-
derly moved by Andreas’s fingers in his search for the crawling arachnids. She doesn’t
seem reluctant to be naked and only slight shyness flushes her cheeks. Both seem fully
enthralled by the erotic charge of the situation. After a few minutes they swap posi-
tions. Andreas lies on his stomach. Ellie searches his back and slowly pulls down his
boxer shorts. While she begins to lick the crack of his butt, the camera shows his face,
which registers surprise at this new sensation, and his transformation through the feel-
ing of her tongue in this intimate place. When she asks him to turn around, the search
for ticks is forgotten. Ellie slowly starts to finger-fuck him. The scene ends with An-
dreas’s orgasm and Ellie moving up again to lie in his arms. In the scene that follows,
they leave the house and scuffle through the city’s outskirts once more.
In opposition to Magnusson’s work, where the possible bite by a tick fosters a
reflection on love and compassion for an animal usually considered unloveable, it here
effects desire and further “impure” contact. The tick is associated with a range of feel-
ings, and desire is rarely among them. Although the tick’s potentially contaminating
invasion of another body is absent in this scene, it becomes symbolically enacted in the
protagonist’s sexual contact. In this scene the trans character Ellie anally penetrates her
lover with her finger. Their sexual encounter becomes a scene of metaphorical contami-
nation regarding how anal sex is culturally framed and stigmatized.54 The contaminat-
ing contact is shifted, though, from the dangerous and unpleasurable bite of the tick to
54. Aguilar, “Pegging and the Heterosexualization of Anal Sex”; Morrison, et al. “We’re Disgusted with
Queers, Not Fearful of Them.”
a wanted and desired contact. Consequently, their practice is linked to sexual deviance
and materializes these two bodies as impure and uncontained themselves.
Interestingly, these two visual works by Bergsmark and Magnusson place the
female/feminine body in the space of nature, which could easily be problematic and
even essentializing—yet neither female body is a normative one. In Magnusson’s instal-
lation Act on Instinct, the female body of the artist has become an animal-transing body
walking through nature and reflecting on it. In Bergsmark’s film Something Must Break,
the female body is a human, gender-transing body in an environment framed by impu-
rity. Historically, feminist theory has often focused on detaching “women” from “na-
ture” due to women’s designated place as being associated with the “natural” rather
than the “cultural” and thus outside of a place of true “human transcendence, rational-
ity, subjectivity, and agency.”55 Nature as the space associated with “corporeality, mind-
lessness, and passivity”56 and the gendered dualism of nature versus culture have been
used to silence particular social groups such as women, people of color, and indigenous
people.57 And yet these two visual artworks show how nature in feminist art has al-
ready, in the late twentieth and early twenty-first century, become a reclaimed space,
reimagined not on the basis of essentialism but “as a habitat for gender-minimizing,
sometimes queer” forms of existence.58
To conclude, the body in these two works is not an innocent body; it is not “pure”
in a Cartesian sense. It is a species-transing and gender-transing body. The latter is im-
plied as an “unnatural” body in Western contexts, which do not permit crossing gender
boundaries without pathologization. In this logic, the gender-transing body becomes
understood as a “degenerate” body, too “deviant” to be “natural.”59 “Nature” and “natu-
ral” are then established as constant equivalents to cisgender, heterosexual bodies.
This correlation also makes apparent the complex signification of nature as a nonratio-
nal, essentialized, feminine realm while being simultaneously coded as a cisnormative
or even hypermasculine, heterosexual space of masculine wilderness.60 Consequently,
placing the gender-transing body into nature enacts a uniquely forceful (re)appropria-
tion of this space, and in particular of the meaning of toxicity. Proximity to nature and
toxic companion animals like the tick then become a different kind of nature, one that
is always imbricated in toxic relations in which toxic bodies take this charge and build
new socialities with and within the natural world.
To emphasize this even further, the two protagonists in this film sequence are
embedded in an “impure,” polluted environment. Indoors and outdoors, garbage and
contamination dominate the aesthetics—a dirty room littered with empty beer cans
and full ashtrays; dirty lakes and highway ramps outside; even their own bodies “con-
taminated” in their queerness. This aesthetic allows me to consider that perhaps ticks
are kin after all,61 though not likeable or charismatic. Ticks, to follow Hatley, in their un-
nerving presence, “insist on our acknowledging in our very flesh the depth and uncan-
niness of our relatedness to them and, by implication, to all other living beings.”62 For
trans bodies, this could mean something specific—in “our very flesh” there is a related-
ness to the other Other that is deemed disposable. What does this mean for our ethics
of relationality, if we include the trans body, as well as other human unloved Others,
within these ethics?
Being Disposable
When trans activist and historian Leslie Feinberg died in 2014, at sixty-five years old,
the trans community worldwide was struck with grief over their early death. They
passed away after three and a half decades of battling the co-infections that riddled
their body due to tick-borne Lyme disease.63 Feinberg was a white, secular Jewish,
working-class butch and trans activist who grew up in the dangerous trans- and homo-
phobic climate of the US in the early 1960s. I was very saddened when I heard about
their death. Leslie Feinberg’s achievements within and for the trans community had
been enormous and substantially contributed to the formation of the field of intersec-
tional and feminist transgender studies.64
The encounter between a Lyme bacteria–infected arachnid and Leslie Feinberg
proved fatal for Feinberg. Their treatment was a tour de force through a medical estab-
lishment that is all too well known for its biases against those whose bodies defy
norms.65 Feinberg’s masculine gender expression, their butch lesbian and later also gen-
derqueer trans position, was at odds with their “legal gender” and the normative, con-
ventional perception of their anatomy. In consequence, when the first symptoms of
Lyme appeared, their medical condition remained undiagnosed and untreated for three
decades. Their disease became chronic, and only in the last six years of their life were
they able to receive appropriate medical attention.66 The illness, however, could never
be fully cured due to limited health insurance that covered no more than two weeks of
antibiotic treatment. In their online research blog “Lyme Series,”67 Feinberg explains,
“My treatment has been too little, too late. . . . Putting some of this research together in
a readable form has taken a great toll on my health. I must turn now towards palliative
approaches to my care. At this time I am so ill, I can’t answer questions, or discuss or
debate this material.”68 At the point of writing this entry, Feinberg’s health was poor. It
was just a few years before their death. Their condition had repeatedly improved tem-
porarily with short-term antibiotic treatment, but every time they stopped taking the
medicine their health deteriorated again. Long-term treatment was unaffordable for
them. In the “Lyme Series” they documented their struggle against a biased health-care
system and in particular the apparently reluctant approach in parts of the US to diag-
nose a patient with Lyme disease. For many years Feinberg was often too ill to leave
the house and approached this through their photo series Screened-In, explained by
Sandi Bohle, a friend and Lyme activist, as “a disability-art class-conscious documen-
tary” of their Hawley-Green neighborhood in Syracuse, New York, “photographed en-
tirely from behind the windows” of their apartment.69 This series consists of 119 photo-
graphs of the environment of the neighborhood—houses, gardens, the street,
neighbors, and the visible sky.
According to historian and public health scholar Beatrix Hoffman, disease, treat-
ment, and access to care are strongly affected by privilege, normativity, and/or acknowl-
edgment as a proper body.70 How seriously someone is taken in medical diagnostic pro-
cedures is unfortunately often linked to their appearance, their class background, and
their gender, race, or ability.71 Feinberg addresses this link by writing, “I had hoped to
write much more about how ruling classes have historically used already existing preju-
dices to deny the scientific resources and individual aid that epidemics require. I had
wanted in particular to write more about institutionalized racism, women’s oppression
and other barriers to health care, about the infamous ‘Tuskegee experiment’ and the
AIDS epidemic.”72 Feinberg’s symptoms had not been taken seriously, rendered as non-
existent and phantasmatic. This is true for many Lyme patients, who are diagnosed
by inexperienced or uninformed medical staff. Lyme disease is a difficult illness; its
66. According to the Advocate obituary written by Feinberg’s partner Minnie Bruce Pratt, they were first
infected in the early 1970s, and after “decades of suffering” were first diagnosed appropriately and then treated
in 2008. They suffered from multiple tick-borne co-infections, including Lyme disease, babeisiosis, and proto-
myxzoa rheumatica. Advocate.com editors, “Transgender Pioneer.”
67. Feinberg, “Lyme Series.” This series is sometimes also referred to as “Casualty of an undeclared war
series” according to the name of the first entry of the blog, while the URL says “Lyme Series.”
68. Feinberg, “Lyme Series.”
69. Bohle, “Touched by Lyme.”
70. Hoffman, “Health Care Reform.”
71. Feinberg, “Lyme Series.”
72. Feinberg, “Lyme Series.”
symptoms are broad and are all too often dismissed, underdiagnosed, or misdiagnosed,
as the disease can mimic other conditions such as multiple sclerosis, fibromyalgia,
chronic fatigue syndrome, and even Alzheimer’s disease.73
The overriding feelings that the tick fosters in relation to Leslie Feinberg’s life and
the experience of their illness are anger, and more implicit in the quotes above, grief
and vulnerability as Feinberg explains that they are in need of palliative care and are
too weak to discuss the published material. What ethics of response-ability appear in
these quotes? It is an ethics to respond to the Other, with Feinberg writing about the
tick, the biased medical gatekeeper system, and its racism and transphobia. The ethics
that emerge beyond that involve the question of how to deal with the Other—how
does normative society approach the body that deviates? How do we as non-binary and
trans people approach the other Other: the parasite, the insect, the arachnid, ourselves?
I do not mean to say that ticks have to be left living under all circumstances—as I
said, I have a hard time feeling empathy for them. I just wonder whether we should
not consider once more whose lives we render as worthy, who we protect, and who we
consider killable.74 This shift offers an experiment in thinking about what we as hu-
mans do with the ones we don’t love. This applies in many contexts to the human
trans body, which continues to experience its historical rendering as harmful in the vio-
lence and stigmatization of the present. In a very different form, the unloved Other in-
cludes a range of animals that are seen as too ugly, too dangerous, or too profitable
to be protected by love. Clearly, the tick and the human trans body are unloved Others
of different kinds. Whereas their bodies remind us of the importance of an ethics of
response-ability toward such unloved Others, their difference reminds us that how
we respond is always dependent on context and other kinds of relationalities and
obligations.
Apart from the emotions in the meeting between Feinberg and the tick, the small
creature also guides me to writings by others on ticks and about Feinberg. Feinberg’s
death was followed by a storm of blog posts in honor of their activism and work, creat-
ing an astonishing archive of collective mourning.75 Unable to discuss the diversity of
writing in the different posts, I want to briefly focus on one blog in particular: “Letters
for Les. A genderqueer scamp’s letters to the transgender warrior,” published by the au-
thor Gritz, age twenty-three. In Gritz’s blog posts, mourning emerges even more directly
than in Feinberg’s writing. In this blog, the author writes a series of letters to Feinberg
postmortem. Here is a section of their first letter:
73. Cameron, “Consequences of Treatment Delay in Lyme Disease”; Cameron, “Misdiagnosing Lyme
Disease.”
74. I see very important links here between Judith Butler’s discussion on grievability and norms of recog-
nition that she has carried out with an exclusively human focus, e.g., in Precarious Life. I would have liked to
transpose her work into a more-than-human context. Unfortunately, for now, the frame of this article on toxic
embodiment exceeds such a complex transposition of her concept into the field of the posthumanities.
75. There are many entries, often written by activists and friends. To give a few examples, see Halberstam,
“Leslie Feinberg”; Wilchins, “Leslie Feinberg’s Gone”; and Bohle, “Touched by Lyme.”
I am going to write you. You, of course, are already gone. I know that you are dead—
claimed far too soon from the bite(s) of ticks and even greater bites sustained from an
“undeclared war.” If there is an afterlife, I don’t know that my words will reach you; I
will leave any express lanes to you for your family of friends. Because wildfires are spark-
ing, leaping, and wilding across Oregon, I will not burn this so that ashes may dance up-
wards in heat before nestling into the soil you are now part of. Instead, I will transfer
words letter by letter with a tiny trowel to a screen, releasing word fireflies into the web.
You will never know me, nor I you. But I will write you. A queer to a queer, a stone to a
stone, one human to another human, I write you.76
This writer has not had the chance to fully read Stone Butch Blues or any other volume
published by Feinberg at the start of their letter series. Yet their compassion for Fein-
berg’s death is tangible in every line they write, as is their search for advice on how to
cope with this world, as a young stone non-binary person.
I don’t wish to put you on a pedestal as perfect, Leslie, but you give me someone to look
up to. I thank you for that. I wish I had explored your work sooner.77
Gritz’s letters that follow are a conversation across class and age differences, as much
as an exchange across different gendered markers, from butch to trans to genderqueer.
Feinberg’s death is the starting point for this author to reflect on questions of fitting in
and disidentifying with the conventional registers of the gender binary, as much as an
encouragment to contest these norms.
I think I’m doing okay even if sometimes I’m left floating outside of everything as if I’m
hungry and my head is light—too empty of gender roles and identities others use to re-
main grounded. But it’s starting to get to me.78
The letters are intimate, personal conversations that take up issues such as misgender-
ing, coming of age, and body dysphoria, but also speak about less pressing issues like
travel, university classes, and family gatherings. The tick in the activist writing by Fein-
berg and also by Gritz led me to encounter feelings that come after the potentiality of an
infected tick crawling over one’s body and its possible bite; it’s the sadness of an ap-
proaching death, the mourning of a loss of a community member due to a failing and
biased medical system, and also community formation in the assembling of a written
archive that accounts for the legacy of Feinberg’s persona and trans activism.
76. Letters for Les, “Dear Leslie,” August 19, 2015, lettersforleslie.com/2015/08/.
77. Letters for Les, “Why,” August 20, 2015, lettersforleslie.com/2015/08/.
78. Letters for Les, “Explanations,” August 19, 2015, lettersforleslie.com/2015/08/.
The tick in this material of activist writing emerges through grief, anger, and vul-
nerability. But it also brings readers to a place of mourning and community belonging.
It is an unexpected response in the relationality of ticks and trans bodies. Furthermore,
the tick highlights here literally how its contact has been fatal. Its toxicity exceeds by far
its potential to transmit disease. In addition, it shows the lethal toxicity that is part of a
larger system, which is material, discursive, infrastructural, social, medical, and gener-
ally discriminatory. The medical system and Western society, here showcased through
Leslie Feinberg’s limited access to appropriate treatment in the US American context,
failed when asked to deal with a human body that did not accommodate the norms of
“proper” embodiment—a system that mirrors how Western society renders the unloved
human Other disposable and neglectable. The response-ability, when applied also to
human-human relations, calls for an ethics of acknowledging the Other, being respon-
sive as much as responsible.
In the three different materials discussed in this article, I intended to investigate
how ticks and human trans bodies meet in a different way, one that frames them
through a shared livability rather than devaluation. And I wanted to explore how this
allows for the potential for a queer, toxic sociality, but furthermore gives space to a
wider discussion of who is considered killable in which context. Both ticks and trans
bodies are considered by different groups as threatening: ticks by most humans, trans
bodies by transphobic perpetrators as much as the everyday life of cisnormativity, start-
ing with gendered toilets or misgenderings. Then, how easily do human societies consider
something killable depending on its social status? In considering the shared designation
as unloved Others on these bodies, I wanted to look at what ethical claims open up in
the material and what feelings are evoked in the meeting of these two bodily entities.
livable worlds and survivable futures and the acknowledgment of the queer affinities
that sit in this place of the toxic as a material-discursive boundary figuration.
I hope that I was able to convey the thought that when writing about the joint
sites of toxicity and the suggestion that both ticks and trans bodies are unloved Others
in their respective contexts, I did not mean to advocate for the tick as a lovable creature
or as equal to human trans bodies. Instead my intention was to unfold the figure of the
toxic as a shared site, as I wrote earlier in reference to Braidotti, and to see how it car-
ries its history into the future and creates a sociality between unlikely bodies.
Hence, the proximity of the tick and the trans body in the works under discussion
here materialize an important link between trans and animal bodies and in general the
“de-humanized” human body. This dehumanized body shares, as I have argued, with
some animals, particularly the tick, the category of the unloved Other. So many differ-
ent human bodies have been approached that way, as unloved Others—crip bodies,
indigenous bodies, black and nonwhite bodies, poor and old bodies—and left out of the
category of proper human embodiment, always facing the violence that comes with
the absence of this status.
Instead of contesting the charge of the toxic, I wonder if this rendering of the toxic
body can be appropriated. Accepting the dehumanizing charge of toxicity can then
mean accepting and appropriating this position as toxic, contaminating, or maybe even
monstrous (as Susan Stryker’s early manifesto has beautifully pointed out)80 and in-
stead facilitating new toxic—as well as queer—socialities. Such a suggestion means also
finding oneself in unexpected new company. The tick, as much as other unloved other
animal and human bodies, is then no longer the enemy but part of the multispecies for-
mation creating a relation between different toxic bodies that need to be responded to
and approached through reciprocity and relationality.
Considering trans bodies as part of the category of unloved Others allows for trans
and non-binary people to possibly reexamine their allies and invite multispecies rela-
tions into the equation. For the general human social context, it can mean an ethical
consideration of who is seen as “killable” and “disposable” and bring awareness to the
fact that trans people are all too often the target as shown in hate crime statistics and
numerous unregistered attacks. The category of unloved Other has been an experiment
for me in this article, to consider the charge of the parasitic, toxic, dehumanized one
and to depart from the failing recognition of the human context into the potentiality of
joining into a toxic sociality with the unloved animal Other.
WIBKE STRAUBE works as senior lecturer at the Centre for Gender Studies at Karlstad University,
Sweden. Wibke earned their PhD in 2014 in gender studies from Linköping University, Sweden.
Their thesis, “Trans Cinema and Exit Scapes,” focuses on utopian cinematic scenes of reimagin-
ing trans-becoming. Their current research is devoted to exploring trans embodiment, pollution,
and intimacy in environmental art and film.
Acknowledgments
I would like to warmly thank the editorial team of this special issue, Olga Cielemęcka and Cecilia Ås-
berg, for their wholehearted encouragement and truly helpful feedback. I am grateful to the anony-
mous reviewers who lent their time to guiding the development of this article as well as to Astrida
Neimanis, Elizabeth DeLoughrey, and Thom van Dooren for their generous engagement with the text
and for making important final suggestions. I also wish to thank Luca Tainio for his invaluable, pa-
tient readings and commenting; Tara Mehrabi and Magdalena Górska for being my sparring partners
in thinking toxic socialities; and my colleagues at the Centre for Gender Studies for indispensable col-
legial support. My special thanks go out to Leslie Feinberg for their writing and activism as well as to
Ester and Elin for the worlds they create in their art.
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