VOL.

01: BREAD
MSCHF MAGAZINE

WHAT’S INSIDE
MPFR333
10 Second Consulting
Uber Hearse
+More! C $ H 4 $ C H M 1
Z
THIS IS
MSCHF
MAGAZINE
👀
When we see a system, we gotta try to break it.

All of these things may work, and, equally, all may not.
We’re writing fictions of subversion on the platforms we exist on
everyday. We say everything’s worth a shot, but some of these
might have real repercussions. We assume utterly no liability if
you try these. In fact by reading this book you affirm that you have
read and agree to this provision.

There, our ass is covered.

That said, we’re gonna do it all.

BINGO BOB, EDITOR

BEST IF USED BY:MAY 2021

MSCHF MAG VOLUME 01 : BREAD

CONTENTS

TALE FROM MSCHF

Getting shut down by every media company at once 06
.MPFR33
Universal Basic Royalties 12
10-SECOND CONSULTING
Bureaucracy as a weapon against big corporations 26
UBER HEARSE
The best wheels in the west 34
SPY ON ADVERTISERS
They’re sure as shit spying on you 44
3
ALWAYS PUNCH
SOMETHING

NEVER PUNCH
DOWN
5
 Allthestreams.fm

MSCHF DROP #17: ALL THE STREAMS

A QUICK LOOK AT THE LIFE OF A DROP ;)

6 hours in: Automated takedown notices received.

(Did you know all the media companies use the same
automated service? Same name on the emails from
Netflix and Disney and HBO)

8 hours in: Personal emails from execs at the MPAA.

8 hours and 5 minutes in: AWS Web Services take down

notice (24 hours to comply).

16 hours in: A black Escalade parked outside our CEO’s

house and dark-suited man with papers.

20 hours in: We shut it down.

7
ent taking place via AllTheStreams.fm (the “unauthorized service”). It is clear that under US copyright law
g their copyrighted works, as well as inducing and encouraging infringement by others. This is a very se
eams.fm. This is a top priority to our members and Amazon and we do not view this as a simple prank. T
step of contacting your hosting provider Noticeas
of well
Infringement of allthestreams.fm
as other internet intermediaries that provide services to
ent.Please contact me immediately to discuss this matter. I have copied my colleague, Karen Thorland,
this email shall be deemed a waiver of any rights related to this infringement. Dear ALLTHESTREAMS.F
ve that the website located at ALLTHESTREAMS.FM (the “Website”) is hosting and/or facilitating the dow
rights in such content (the “HBO Properties”). No one is authorized to exhibit, reproduce, transmit, or oth
n of HBO Properties constitutes copyright infringement. This conduct may also violate the laws of other
described below on the Website is not authorized by the copyright owner, its agent, or the law. Accordin
ebsite, and further requests that ALLTHESTREAMS.FM confirms in writing to the undersigned that (i) ac
older under your Abuse Policy/Terms of Service Agreement. The information in this notice is accurate a
gedly infringed. This letter is not a complete statement of HBO’s rights in connection with this matter, an
n with this matter, all of which are expressly reserved. We appreciate your assistance and thank you for y
s message with your inquiry to ensure a quick response. Sincerely, Brad Bo On behalf of Home Box Offi
on of copyrighted work(s) and location(s) of copyright infringing material or activity: Game of Thrones. D
cture studios in the United States, specifically, Paramount Pictures Corporation, Sony Pictures Entertain
dios, LLC, and their respective affiliates (collectively, the “MPA Member Studios”), which own or control e
g to demand that you take immediate steps to address the extensive copyright infringement of television
ebsite”). Under U.S. copyright law, indexing, linking to, framing, transmitting, retransmitting, providing ac
anating from unauthorized Internet websites constitutes contributory copyright infringement. See Metro
009 U.S. Dist. Lexis 122661, at *56 (C.D. Cal. Dec. 21, 2009) (defendants liable for infringement where they
ment Inc. v. Free-tv-video-online.info, Case No. CV 08-8484 (C.D. Cal. Feb. 1, 2010), a court granted summ
nce that your Website might not have infringing content on it, or only links to infringing content. For exam
nd providing links to infringing content. See Fung, 2009 U.S. Dist. Lexis 122661, at *56. Your copyright infr
See, e.g., Universal City Studios Prods. LLLP v. Movierumor.com, Case No. CV 08-4931 (C.D. Cal. Jun. 18
work). Attached as Exhibit A is a list of some of the motion pictures and television programs that are own
s provided as a representative sample of the infringements being committed as a result of your operatio
not intended to suggest that the identified infringements are the only ones occurring on the Website or
examples of what is obvious from even a cursory review of your Website. Your Website promotes and fac
infringement on the site is so prevalent it appears to be the predominant use of your Website. The only w
m using the Website to directly or indirectly cause, contribute to, enable, facilitate, aid, abet, induce, enco
hose works identified on the enclosed Exhibit A. In particular, we demand that you stop indexing, linking
that you ensure that links to the works on Exhibit A and to other television programs and motion picture
obtained proper authorization from the relevant copyright owner. Moreover, to the extent that you or you
A Member Studios’ copyrighted works in violation of U.S. copyright law, or (ii) uploading unauthorized co
ch your and/or other websites link, we demand that you immediately and permanently cease and desist
sion programs owned by the MPA Member Studios in the manner occurring via the Website is not autho
perjury, we are authorized to act on behalf of the MPA Member Studios, which own or control exclusive
and remedies of the MPA Member Studios, all of which are expressly reserved. If you have any question
epresent the Motion Picture Association. Our members are: Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures, Netflix
er Bros. Entertainment Inc. Through their membership in the Alliance for Creativity and Entertainment (A
ce via AllTheStreams.fm (the “unauthorized service”). It is clear that under US copyright law the unautho
ed works, as well as inducing and encouraging infringement by others. This is a very serious matter and
ity to our members and Amazon and we do not view this as a simple prank. The service has caused an
g your hosting provider as well as other internet intermediaries that provide services to your unauthorize
diately to discuss this matter. I have copied my colleague, Karen Thorland, who runs our global litigation
waiver of any rights related to this infringement. Dear ALLTHESTREAMS.FM, We are writing this letter o
ALLTHESTREAMS.FM (the “Website”) is hosting and/or facilitating the downloading and/or streaming o
MSCHF
Properties”). No oneMAG VOLUME 01
is authorized : BREAD
to exhibit, reproduce, transmit, or otherwise distribute HBO Propertie
s copyright infringement. This conduct may also violate the laws of other countries, international law, an
 w the unauthorized service is violating the exclusive rights or our members and Amazon as it is publicly
erious matter and can lead to serious legal consequences. We demand that you immediately shut down
The service has caused and is continuing to cause serious harm to our members and Amazon. We have
o your unauthorized service and requestedCopyrightthat
Infringement - AllTheStreams.fm
they cease providing services based on the ongoing
who runs our global litigation. We hereby reserve all our members and Amazon’s legal rights and reme
FM, We are writing this letter on behalf of HOME BOX OFFICE, INC. (“HBO”). We have received informatio
wnloading and/or streaming of content (listed below) in which HBO is the copyright owner and/or the o
herwise distribute HBO Properties without the express written permission of HBO, and the unauthorized
r countries, international law, and/or treaty obligations. We have a good faith belief that use of the copyr
ngly, HBO requests that ALLTHESTREAMS.FM immediately cease access to the HBO Properties in conn
ccess to the HBO Properties has been removed and that (ii) appropriate actions have been taken agains
and we state, under penalty of perjury, that we are authorized to act on behalf of the owner of an exclusiv
nd nothing contained herein constitutes an express or implied wavier of any rights or remedies of HBO in
your cooperation in this matter. Any further inquiries can be directed to agent@hbo.copyright-notice.co
ffice, Inc. 2880 Lakeside Drive, Suite 360 Santa Clara, CA 95054 E-mail: agent@hbo.copyright-notice.com
Dear Operator of allthestreams.fm: The Motion Picture Association, Inc. (“MPA”) represents each of the m
nment Inc., Universal City Studios LLC, Warner Bros. Entertainment Inc., Walt Disney Studios Motion Pict
exclusive rights under copyright in and to a vast number of motion pictures and television shows worldw
n programs and motion pictures that is occurring by virtue of your operation of the Internet website allth
ccess to, and/or otherwise aiding or assisting those who stream infringing copies of copyrighted audiov
o-Goldwyn-Mayer Studios Inc. v. Grokster, Ltd., 545 U.S. 912 (2005); Columbia Pictures Indus., Inc. v. Fun
y operated a website that provided an index of and links to copies of plaintiffs’ works). Indeed, in Warner
mary judgment against owners of an Internet website who knowingly provided links to infringing works. It
mple, in Fung, defendants did not store any infringing content on their website but were subject to liabilit
ringement can subject you to liability for substantial damages, along with attorneys’ fees, costs, and a p
8, 2009) (approving request for statutory damages against the website operator in the amount of $150,00
ned or controlled by the MPA Member Studios and/or their affiliates and that are being infringed by your
on of the Website and to demonstrate the readily-apparent nature of the massive infringement occurrin
are the only ones that you must immediately and permanently remove. Exhibit A, moreover, merely prov
cilitates blatant infringement of the MPA Member Studios’ copyrights and countless other copyrights. In
way not to notice would be to turn a blind-eye to the obvious. We hereby demand that you immediately c
ourage, and/or participate in the infringement of the MPA Member Studios’ copyrighted works, including
g to, providing access to, or in any way contributing to the infringement of the MPA Member Studios’ cop
es whose copyrights are owned by the MPA Member Studios do not appear on the Website in the future
ur agents are involved in (i) directly transmitting, streaming, or otherwise publicly performing unauthorize
opies of the MPA Member Studios’ copyrighted works onto third party websites in violation of U.S. copyri
t from such activities. We are providing this notice based on our good faith belief that the use of motion
orized by the copyright owners, their agents, or the law. The information in this notification is accurate an
rights under copyright that are being infringed in the manner described herein. This letter is without pre
ns, please contact me at 818-995-6600, or via email at global_enforcement@motionpictures.org. Dear G
x Studios, LLC, Paramount Pictures Corporation, Sony Pictures Entertainment Inc., Universal City Studio
ACE), we also represent Amazon Studios. We are contacting you regarding the flagrant copyright infring
orized service is violating the exclusive rights or our members and Amazon as it is publicly performing th
d can lead to serious legal consequences. We demand that you immediately shut down AllTheStreams.
nd is continuing to cause serious harm to our members and Amazon. We have already taken the step of
ed service and requested that they cease providing services based on the ongoing infringement.Please
n. We hereby reserve all our members and Amazon’s legal rights and remedies and nothing in this emai
on behalf of HOME BOX OFFICE, INC. (“HBO”). We have received information leading us to believe that th
of content (listed below) in which HBO is the copyright owner and/or the owner of exclusive rights in suc
es without the express written permission of HBO, and the unauthorized distribution of HBO 9Properties
nd/or treaty obligations. We have a good faith belief that use of the copyrighted materials described bel
UNIVERS
BASIC RO
TITLE

This is how to use Spotify as a passive revenue

generator by min-maxing streaming royalties.

Spotify is a platform that anyone can upload songs to.

The majority of them are buried forever and generate
next to no money or fame for their creators. If you’ve
been on that side of the equation, we’re sorry.

But this is not How To Have A Hit Single*.

*for that see: lulu.com/KLFtheManual

In the Year 2525

MSCHF MAG VOLUME 01 : BREAD

SAL
OYALTIES
ARTIST

Streaming music moves money. It’s hidden from view, but

every song you stream sends money to whole chain of people
upstream.

We could, however, send it to ourselves instead.

We’re not seeing Spotify as a music streaming platform, we’re

seeing Spotify as a tree that grows money.
Let’s get gardening.

Zager & Evans

13
THE SET UP:
SPOTIFY

01.
Spotify pays the same for
a stream of a 1-min song as
for a 10-min song.
02.
The shortest song Spotify
will pay for streams of is 30
seconds. This is the most
efficient money maker.

03.
Spotify pays between
$0.0035 and $0.005

04.
per stream.

A 30-second song can only

be uploaded as part of an
album; the album’s songs
must average > 1-min
in length

MSCHF MAG VOLUME 01 : BREAD

If you stream the shortest possible track for the longest possible
time (24hrs day for a year)...

30 sec. track at the

highest royalty rate

365 24 120 0.005

Days in a year Hours in a day 3600 sec/hr Royalty rate

/ 30secs/stream [Highest]

$5256

Royalties earned per year

30 sec. track at the

lowest royalty rate

365 24 120 0.0035

Days in a year Hours in a day 3600 sec/hr Royalty rate

/ 30secs/stream [Highest]

$3679

Royalties earned per year

15
 💸💸
⁉ 🤔🤔
GETTING

🧮🧮
STARTED

🤑🤑 👼👼
💰💰
We created a handy tool to help you
create an album and calculate your

🎵🎵 🔁🔁
potential earnings!
www.mpfreemoney.mschfmag.com

💤💤 🎶🎶
MSCHF MAG VOLUME 01 : BREAD
 WHAT YOU NEED

EASY!
EASY!
EASY!
EASY!
✅ A “song”

✅ Album art

✅ An uploading service

👼👼
✅  Spotify account (premium
A
accounts generate more
money per play)

WHAT YOU DON’T NEED

❌ To be a musician

❌ To be signed to a label
IT’S
IT’S
IT’S
IT’S

❌ To have an agent

17
HOW TO GUIDE

STEP 1 STEP 2
Generate an album Make an account with an
uploading service. (we
and download (Use our recommend DistroKid)
generator)

STEP 3
Upload your album + album art

MSCHF MAG VOLUME 01 : BREAD

 STEP 4
Stream ONLY your
30-second money
song as much as
possible. Leave our
computer playing on
mute overnight.
I’m Rich and Smart
Bingo Bob

STEP 5
Payouts occur every 3 the uploading service you
months from Spotify. In used, which typically update
the meantime you can monthly.
track total plays from via

19
REVENUE

🌝🌝
PROJECTIONS

$1303 AVG.

🔁🔁
IF YOU PLAY YOUR TRACK
CONTINUOUSLY WHILE YOU SLEEP
(7 HOURS PER DAY) FOR A YEAR*

$4468 AVG.

🤝🤝
IF YOU PLAY YOUR TRACK
CONTINUOUSLY, 24/7 FOR A YEAR*

+
$2606 AVG.

IF YOU AND ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS

PLAY YOUR TRACK CONTINUOUSLY
WHILE YOU SLEEP FOR A YEAR*

*Calculations based off average royalty payout

from Spotify and may vary.

MSCHF MAG VOLUME 01 : BREAD

SOME PERSPECTIVE
This is the most efficient money-
generating song possible on the Spotify
platform; it’s still not much. If you care
about supporting independent musical
artists, buy their albums on Bandcamp or
from their labels.

UNIVERSAL BASIC ROYALTIES

UBI isn’t a solution - it’s a Band-aid. Be
skeptical of proposals for UBI that don’t
address the conditions that create a need
for basic income. Reject any proposal
that would use UBI as an excuse to
eliminate healthcare, arts funding, public
transportation, or loan forgiveness. UBI
can patch the wounds left by predatory
capitalism - maybe even long enough to
stop the bleeding - but it’s a stepping stone
toward a world where basic rights to life
are guaranteed, not bought.

In the meantime, when a corporation gives

us the opportunity to take back wealth,
well, we take those.

21
GOLF
SUCKS
NOW
AND
HAS
ALWAYS
SUCKED
.

MSCHF MAG VOLUME 01 : BREAD

23
“I AM AN ANTIVAXXER.”

STEVE JOBS

25
10 SEC
CONSU
“Buzzfeed has accidentally
paid out multiple fake invoices
because no one checked
what they were
actually for”
Jonah Peretti
CEO of Buzzfeed

💧
MSCHF MAG VOLUME 01 : BREAD
COND
ULTING
MAKE CORPORATE BUREAUCRACY WORK FOR YOU!
Dealing with big companies is brutal, as anyone who’s tried to call
Comcast, the DMV, or a hospital knows well. Working with one is
often much worse. Freelance invoices are paid late, sometimes
never - a state of affairs that is wildly convenient for companies,
and wildly familiar to most of us as work moves towards
remote permalance.

There’s only one upside: when a company gets big and bloated
enough, just sometimes it’s more work to verify an invoice than it
is to pay it. When getting an invoice paid seems like a probability
game, the obvious solution is: send a lot of invoices.

27
HOW TO
10 SECOND CONSULTING
As a potential user of many a large company’s
services or product, you are uniquely positioned to
provide insightful, actionable, and above all valuable
advice to those companies. Doing this is, of course,
called “Consulting” and it’s very highly paid.

ALE
This RT!
(almo is pro
st ce bably

🤫🤫
rtain
Frau ly) fra
d is i ud.
llega
l.

📞📞

MSCHF MAG VOLUME 01 : BREAD

THE PROCESS

CALL A COMPANY
Make sure to speak to a real person directly
employed there, not outsourced support.

RECORD IT
In most* states you can record your call
as proof of services without needing
permission.

This is true in every state except: California, Connecticut, Florida, Illinois, Maryland, Massachusetts,
Montana, New Hampshire, Pennsylvania and Washington. These states require the consent of every
party to a phone call or conversation in order to make the recording lawful.

FIND THE BILLINGS DEPT

Choose a big enough company that the
billing and finance department will be
swamped with paperwork.

INVOICE ‘EM
Choose a big enough company that the
billing and finance department will be
swamped with paperwork.

29
 BILL TO
Verizon, Jon Doe
Jondoe@finance.verzion.net
1095 Avenue of the Americas, 01
New York, NY 10036, USA
212.395.1000

PAY TO BANK DETAILS

Jane Doe Bank: Bank of America
345 Smith Street, Apt 2
Brooklyn, NY 11215 02 Account Type: Checking Account
Account #: 193940571823
Janedoe@gmail.com Routing #: 293840299
701-245-8923

INVOICE TOTAL $456.00

RATE JOB DESCRIPTION HOURS AMOUNT

$4560 Consulting 0.1 $456.00

/hour

03 04 05
SUB TOTAL $456.00

TERMS PAYABLE

Payment is due within 14 days

upon receipt of this invoice 06

An invoice is a document issued by a

☞

contractor to a client that indicates the

services provided and their costs.

MSCHF MAG VOLUME 01 : BREAD

INVOICE ANATOMY

01 BILL TO 01 JOB DESCRIPTION

This is the name and company This is “Consulting”
of the invoice recipient.
02 HOURS
02 PAY TO / BANK DETAILS The amount of hours of
Your personal info and the “consulting” work that you
details of the bank account performed.
you want the money wired to.
03 TERMS PAYABLE
03 RATE This is how long the company
The hourly rate for your has to pay your invoice. Net 14,
“consulting” work. Net 30 are the most common.

We a tool that presents contact

information in the billing department of
various corporations, as well as a handy-
dandy invoice template!

10secondconsulting.mschfmag.com

NOTE: When you send your invoice to the billing department

make sure your attached invoice has all the information needed
to pay it. Don’t risk a follow-up email for details - make it as easy
as possible. Say something short and friendly.

31
MSCHF MAG VOLUME 01 : BREAD
MAKE SOMETHING TOGETHER

>FOLLOW THE GOLDEN RULES

>DON’T BE DUMB
>NORMIE? DON’T BORE ME

DISTRIBUTE IT

>SHOTGUN STYLE
>GO GET EYES

BRING MORE INTO THE FOLD

>FIRST STAGE: FANS

>SECOND STAGE: COMRADES

33
 UBER H

“Because I could not

stop for death, he kindly
stopped for me”
MSCHF MAG VOLUME 01 : BREAD
HEARSE

35
THE FASTEST UBER

Under state law funeral

processions can ignore
traffic laws.

A Hearse is the main

component of a funeral
procession. Funeral
procession vehicles
should be marked with a
purple flag.

MSCHF MAG VOLUME 01 : BREAD

37
Did you know you can just
buy these things?

MSCHF MAG VOLUME 01 : BREAD

39
HEARSE PERKS

K T H E
BREA LIMIT
SPEED

N R ED
RU
I G H TS
L
H AV
PER E THE
R I G HM A N E N
T-O T
F-W
AY

EHT EVIRD
YAW G N O R W
-ENO A PU
T E E R T S YAW
MSCHF MAG VOLUME 01 : BREAD
What state has the
best Hearse Laws?

FL
NV
AZ

OH
ID

PA
We’ve compiled all the bonuses Hearses
get in each state for easy lookup!
MI
uberhearse.mschfmag.com
M
S

IL
IA
GA

OR KC

ND

41
DO YOU HAVE $50K OR MORE IN
UNPAID MEDICAL DEBT?

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU!

EMAIL AYYYY@MSCHF.XYZ

All inquiries kept strictly confidential,

contact for further information
FB REVER
ADS LOO
Shopping? We don’t recommend it!

Companies spy on every move you make online in

order to serve you ads. Spy on their advertisements in
order to deny them as much money as possible.

THE STEPS

1. Go to the company’s Facebook page

2. Hit “See More” under Page Transparency

3. Hit “Go To Ad Library”

4. This will display all ads running across

Facebook and Instagram. Leverage as
many discounts as you can!

MSCHF MAG VOLUME 01 : BREAD

 RSE
OKUP
01. 02.

03. 04.

45
MSCHF MAGAZINE
VOL.01: BREAD