Acute Exposure

A Play by Alice Hakvaag

Version: April 17th, 2020

Contact: alicehakvaag@gmail.com
Dell- High school senior. She/her. A young, confident butch.

Mara- High school senior. She/her. DELL’s neighbor, femme.

At least one of the two, if not both of them, should be an actress of color. Dell can be
played by an actress, trans actress, or non-binary actor of color.

The teacher can either be a cast part, a voiceover, Charlie Brown trombone noises, or
silence, as long as the information can be conveyed clearly.

Setting: April, present day.

US Highway 285, south of Loving, NM. Just past Gyp Bend.
The back yard between Dell and Mara’s houses. It faces southwest.
A school bus stop, by the road in front of Dell and Mara’s houses. It faces
northeast towards US Highway 285.
Dell’s bedroom.

A / indicates an overlap in lines, the next line should start here.

Sc. 1.

DELL stands, looking out at the flat expanse. She wears well-worn blue jeans and a t-
shirt, a denim jacket around her shoulders. She’s holding a large sketchpad under her
arm. She takes a deep breath in, considers letting it out in one big yell, decides against
it, and loudly exhales it out. She looks up at the stars starting to peek out in the twilight.
She looks down at the earth beneath her feet. Both have been here for a long, long
time.

She puts down the sketchpad and holds her hand out in front of her, sticking her thumb
out. She closes one eye, moves her hand so that it looks to her like it is sitting just on
the horizon. She puts her other thumb on top of it, making it twice as tall. She switches
which eye is closed, changing the perspective. She forms a triangle with her fingers,
setting that on the horizon, seeing how that looks. She tries one or two other hand
formations, creating different shapes that rise into the sky. She separates her hands,
sticks both of her middle fingers out, flipping off the horizon, and chuckles.
Sc. 2

A school bus stop. MARA stands at the stop, leaning against the sign. She looks half
asleep. She’s holding a travel mug full of coffee.

DELL walks up to the sign, wearing headphones. She doesn’t say hello, but makes brief
eye contact and nods a greeting, turning to look down the road. MARA nods back, but
doesn’t look away. Eventually, DELL notices. She makes purposeful eye contact. MARA
stares back down at the ground. DELL doesn’t mind, she just keeps looking down the
road for the bus, bopping a little bit to her tunes. MARA has resumed looking at her,
bringing up the courage to speak.

MARA: Um. Hey. Dell? Dell-

DELL: Are you- oh! Mara! Hey.

MARA: Hey. Um.

DELL: If you’re asking about the English homework I can’t help you, I didn’t do it.

MARA: That’s not- you didn’t do it?

DELL: No?

MARA: It was just a plot summary, did you not read-

DELL: No I did. I can summarize it if asked. Beowulf shows up, kills the demon Grendel,
Hrothgar the king thanks him, Grendel’s mother gets mad and kills a dude to take
revenge, Beowulf kills her, flash forward, Beowulf is an old man, goes off with his squire
Wiglaf to kill a dragon, he kills the dragon but dies at the end anyway.

MARA: But you didn’t do the assignment?

DELL: Nah.

MARA: That’s not what I- You should do it though.

DELL: Mm.

MARA: I saw you outside.

DELL: Yeah?

MARA: In your backyard.

DELL: Uh-huh.

MARA: … flippin’ off the sky.

DELL: …

MARA: It’s just. You’ve been out there every day for the past like, three weeks and you
have huge papers and are there for a long time-

DELL: You watching me?

MARA: N-no.

DELL: It sounds like-

MARA: I mean, not on purpose. My window, it… It looks out the same way as your
backyard.

DELL: Ah.

MARA: Just curious.

Beat

MARA: Are you drawing?

DELL: What?

MARA: The landscape, are you drawing-?

DELL: Our landscape is a flat line.

MARA: Ha! Yeah. Yeah.

Beat
DELL: Did you know there’s a nuclear waste disposal site out in the desert?

MARA: … Oh?

DELL: Yep, out east from here. My mom watched a documentary on it. They’re burying
tons of radiated sludge out there. Or, that’s the plan. The government wants to store it
there long-term. Like tens of thousands of years long term. Cause if it’s underground it
can’t be disturbed, and this area is dry enough that water won’t go through it and carry it
out by accident.

MARA: It’s just going to sit in the ground?

DELL: Nowhere else to put it.

MARA: … How will people know it’s down there?

DELL: Hmm?

MARA: Like. Are they putting up a sign? More to herself: A sign isn’t gonna last a
thousand years.

DELL: Whirls on her. Exactly.

MARA: Hmm?

DELL: You need something more permanent.

MARA: Um, yeah.

DELL: … You’re a smart cookie.

MARA: I know.

DELL: You’re the only one who thought that signage might be an issue when I brought
the whole thing up.

DELL looks MARA up and down, nodding appreciatively. MARA, uncomfortable with the
compliment, looks away and takes a sip from her coffee.
DELL: That’s what I’m drawing.

MARA turns back to DELL

DELL: In my backyard.
I’m figuring out a sign that will last.
There’s the fuckin bus. I swear it gets slower every week.
Sc. 3

DELL’s bedroom. A large cork board takes up most of the wall. The desk underneath is
messy, the chair at the desk has laundry on it, and if there’s a bed, it’s unmade. The
furniture is visibly older, as if DELL has had it her whole life. On the corkboard are
drawings, printouts of sculptures, all sorts of paper. It should look like a collage, or a
huge moodboard. All of the drawings are drafts of sculptures, each with a distinct,
unsettling look. It’s not art, it’s metal straining into the air.

DELL and MARA enter, still with their backpacks from school. MARA stops at the
threshold, unsure where to go, she has never been here before. Note: At no point
should DELL initiate or accept physical contact.

DELL: Here, um, you can have the chair- She picks up the laundry and throws it to the
floor.

MARA: Thanks. She takes in the cork board, impressed by its scope

DELL: So, uh, for the presentation, how do we want to divide this up?

MARA: Well we have to cover the author, the actual story, themes, characters, historical
importance and context.

DELL: That’s three topics each, roughly.

MARA: I figured I could take the big ones. Themes, historical stuff, and the characters.

DELL: I mean, yeah, but that sounds like a lot of- Do you want to split the characters
up? We don’t know the author, Beowulf basically doesn’t have one. That slide will take
two seconds.

MARA: It’s just.

It’s worth a lot of points and I want to make sure it-

DELL: I’ll do a good job, I promise. I don’t screw around with other people’s grades.
Plus I want a good grade too!
Seriously. This’ll either put me in a good spot or completely fuck me and have me
fail the class and not graduate.
It’s why I was glad I got you as a partner!
MARA: … What characters do you want?

DELL: What are we counting?

MARA: Beowulf, obviously. The dragon. Hrothgar. Grendel-

DELL: I can do Beowulf and the dragon, if you want.

MARA: Yeah, I can do the others. Ok. Her eyes keep getting drawn to the board with all
the sketches. DELL notices.

DELL: These are what I’m drawing in the backyard.

MARA: Sorry?

DELL: Signs. For the pit. MARA takes the time to actually look. DELL reaches and takes
one off the board. Don’t look at that one that one’s not good.

MARA: They all look so-

DELL: Weird.

MARA: At the same time Abstract.

DELL: Abstract?

MARA: Like, when you said a sign, I kinda thought like, a big imposing slab of stone
with writing- you know, like a literal sign.

DELL: Oh.

MARA: But these are like, sculptures. She points to one. Did you do this one?

DELL: Oh, no. I’m not the only person who has thought of this. There was a whole task
force assembled back in the 80s, trying to figure out the best way to mark the
permanent resting place of all the waste. The one architect on the team thought of this
“landscape of thorns”

MARA: … did someone else think of a big slab of stone with writing?
DELL: Yeah, they were gonna put a lot of languages on it with room for more
translations, like an ongoing Rosetta Stone.

MARA: vindicated, more to herself Nice.

DELL: I actually have- hold on- She takes another piece of paper off the corkboard.
Here’s the message that they decided to try and translate.

She reads aloud. While she does, MARA stares, both listening intently, and studying
DELL with the same up and down look that DELL gave her that morning at the bus stop.

DELL: This place is a message

Part of a system of messages
Pay attention to it!
Sending this message was important to us.
We considered ourselves to be a powerful culture.
This is not a place of honor.
No highly esteemed deed is commemorated here.
Nothing valued is here.
What is here was dangerous and repulsive to us.
This message is a warning about danger.
The danger is in a particular location.
It increases towards a center.
The center of danger is here.
Of a particular size and shape, below us.
The danger is still present in your time as it was in ours.
The danger is to the body, and can kill.
The form of danger is an emanation of energy.
The danger is unleashed only if you substantially disturb this place physically.
This place is best shunned and uninhabited.

MARA: Oh wow.

DELL: Right???

MARA: That’s some dark shit right there.

DELL: If I came across that in the desert and like, understood it? I’d be like, whaaaat???

MARA: And that’s going to be on the markers?

DELL: Yeah. They came up with a bunch of different ideas too, cause like, languages
change all the time, writing might not even exist anymore, they might not know what
nuclear radiation is at all. We need them to know why we made this huge marker. The
trick is trying to capture the tone of this points at the sheet of paper she read from in
these points to the drawings on the corkboard.

MARA: How do you know so much about this?

DELL: My mom and dad were talking about it, since it’s in our county we get, like,
regular updates.
Dad was worried that it might leak into the ground, like an oil well.
We get a lot of food from our garden, so that’s my dad’s main concern
But ya know, they aren’t gonna listen to one family who needs their garden to eat
when they’re a government project with billions of dollars behind them.

MARA: Is this like, for a class?

DELL: Why?

MARA: I mean, you’ve put so much thought and effort into this. Is it a project for
something?

DELL: Oh, uh, no. No I’m just. Doing it.

MARA: … yeah?

DELL: Listen I know it looks bad that I have all this and then I’m all but failing English
but I need something to work on and this is big-picture enough that it actually keeps my
attention-

MARA: Big picture?

DELL: Yeah, like. High school, especially now, since we’re seniors, doesn’t matter.
None of this, gestures at their backpacks matters. It’s transitional. This is a leaping point
to where we’re going next, whether it’s a job or college or whatever. Leaving a mark for
humans to know something crazy dangerous is out in the desert, now that’s important
work.
I’m doing important work.
Beat.

MARA: What are you doing after this?

DELL: What?

MARA: High school, graduation, I mean. I don’t see you wearing any college swag but
you’re in Honors English.

DELL: Oh, I’m going to University of New Mexico.

MARA: In Albuquerque?

DELL: Yeah. First person in my family to ever go.

MARA: Oh, shit. Congratulations.

DELL: Yeah, yeah. Got early admissions so I’ve known since, like, October. Just gotta
send in the first deposit.

MARA: Jeez, ok. If I had known where I was going in October I wouldn’t have shut up
about it.

DELL: I didn’t want to be like Ally.

MARA: Yeah she definitely didn’t shut up about it.

DELL: We get it. You’re going to college in LA. Big deal.

MARA: I’m still making my decision.

DELL: Have you heard back?

MARA: Yeah, I got into everything I applied to. It’s just deciding which one now.

DELL: Wow.

Beat.

DELL: Why are you talking to me?

MARA: … We have a presentation we have to work on?

DELL: Outside of that. We haven’t spoken outside of English class all year. We grunt at
each other each morning and that’s it, and that’s been it for like, years. This morning
you just started… and now we’re in here, chatting? And like, I’m not judging you. No
one talks to me. People don’t seem to vibe with me easily and now you’re in my room-

MARA: Do you remember what you said in class last week?

DELL: I say a lot of things in class, every week. My participation grade is the only thing
keeping me from failing right now.

MARA: Last week, when Mrs. Gastrock had us read that article about Cueva de las
Manos.

DELL: The cave with the handprints on the walls?

MARA: Yes! Yes, that one. We had to write an argumentative essay on why early
humans might’ve painted their hands on the walls of the cave. No other sources, just
the science from the article, and framing the facts in a way that spun the reason we
chose into the best one.
You finished writing yours in three minutes. We had half an hour.

DELL: I mean, it was just an exercise. It wasn’t a grade.

MARA: But you sat there and put down your pencil, and you leaned back, looked at
your paper, and you just looked so…. Sure. Of yourself. What you put down was right.
And I got mad! You looked so certain, why did I need a full half hour when apparently it
could be done in three minutes? By you, of all people!
Afterwards, after we handed them in, Mrs. Gastrock asked us all just to share so
we could compare. And I started to feel better because at that point I saw that most of
us were writing through the whole time and I figured- to be honest, I figured you were
just being lazy, again, and you’d see what kind of mistake you made when we all
outlined our arguments, but again, you just sat there. Arms crossed. Listening, but still
so fuckin’ sure.
And then Mrs. Gastrock asks you. What your argument as to why humans
painted their hands on caves, alongside the ancient buffalo and horses and fish. And
you just say-
DELL: They wanted to.

MARA: And everyone laughed at you and Mrs. Gastrock rolled her eyes and we moved
on.

DELL: Yeah.

MARA: What... does that mean?

DELL: They just… wanted to? I don’t know. I wasn’t trying to be clever. I’m sorry I made
you mad. That just made the most sense to me, and it’s not like anyone could argue
against it.

MARA: I just… humans a long long time ago decided it was important to leave a mark.
That cave was special to them.
Shouldn’t we respect what they made there?

DELL: Humans like marking where they’ve been. If there's nothing there, we want to be
the first person to leave a mark. If something is already there, we have to figure out
what it means, It’s probably why I’m doing this.
I’m trying to make a mark.
Beat
There is actually something I could do with this.

MARA: Yeah?

DELL: There’s a little competition about experimental stuff like this going on at the
university, specifically for high schoolers. I could win a little money. Not like, a full ride or
anything, but like. It definitely would make things easier.

MARA: That’s great. You should do that.

DELL: I’m actually gonna finish this thing, so I just might.

You never answered my question.

MARA: Hmm?

DELL: Why are you- why are you so interested? In this, in me.

MARA: I was surprised that I got mad at you so I’m trying to… trying to… understand?
Beat. MARA is embarrassed. She looks down at the paper again, becoming very
interested in the words on the page. DELL studies MARA, trying to figure her out.

DELL: When you show the room that you can’t be fucked with, no one will fuck with you.

MARA: Have people-

DELL: Oh please.

Beat.

DELL: quietly, just shy of a threat Are you going to fuck with me?

MARA: … No?

DELL: brightly, on a dime Good!

Sc. 4

DELL stands in her backyard, looking over the expanse. She puts a thumb out, adjusts
it so it’s sitting just on the horizon. Something is different this time, however; she knows
she is being watched. She tries to focus, she picks up her sketchpad and starts
drawing. She holds the pad too close to her chest, as if she’s afraid someone is going to
peek over her shoulder and look at it. She stops drawing, and starts trying to see
MARA’s house from the periphery of her vision. Finally she quickly glances over her
shoulder towards offstage, looking at her neighbor’s house and MARA’s bedroom
window. Did she see someone? She turns back to her drawing. She sighs and looks out
at the horizon. She turns and goes back inside.
Sc. 5

DELL’s bedroom. A few of the papers on the cork board have changed, either moved
around, or replaced with new drafts. MARA sits with her laptop and homework sprawled
out in front of her. She works, halfway listening to DELL. DELL has a single notebook
out in front of her, forgotten, as she talks.

DELL: So of COURSE Gastrock was like, trying to relate, right? Be the cool English
teacher. So she starts asking if everything was ok at HOME. Like! Bitch! Everything is
fine at home! It’s school that’s the problem!

MARA: Sitting in class isn’t everyone’s strong suit.

DELL: That’s not even it, it’s the PEOPLE we have to sit with.

MARA: Not everyone is so bad.

DELL: Ideally, we’d all just put our heads down and not talk. That would be amazing.

MARA: I love it when Jake shuts up.

DELL: I don’t need to hear him talk! No one does!

MARA: Did you hear what he said as he was walking into class?

DELL: … no?

MARA: I was walking behind him from biology. You’re lucky you didn’t. You probably
would’ve thrown a punch.

DELL: What did he say??

MARA: It wasn’t, like, about you. He was just saying how boys and girls are biologically
different, so that’s why boys are better at sports.

DELL: That’s… not even remotely-

MARA: And theeeen he said lesbians were proof of that.

DELL: … how??
MARA: Well, his train of thought seemed to be that lesbians tend to be more masculine
and the stereotype is that you- they tend to play more sports. So logically they play
more sports because biologically they are more like men cause they’re attracted... to
women.

DELL: That is… a leap.

MARA: Do you play sports? Off her confusion I don’t know, I just- I played volleyball. Up
until last year.

DELL: … Soccer, through freshman year. Then the team got a little clique-y and I
couldn’t keep up with it, so.

MARA: I’m sorry, I interrupted.

DELL: It’s ok, I don’t mind listening.

It’s the first time someone has talked at me for this long.

MARA: But you were complaining about-

DELL: GASTROCK. So she starts being like, is everything ok at home? Cause like, I bet
they have to ask that when someone’s grades are in the toilet. And I was like, yeah,
everything is fine, and she DOESN’T DROP IT. She says she can “see I want to talk
about something.” No I don’t! I was embarrassed that I was asked to see her after class
in front of everybody, that’s why I was like, looking down or whatever. So she keeps
going and she’s like, “I understand things might be uncomfortable for you; your body is
telling you things and you’re trying to figure it out, but have you considered just keeping
your head down and working hard?” LIKE. COME ON.

MARA: Yiiiikes.

DELL: Yeah, uh, yeah Gastrock. Working harder on my homework is totally going to fix
how people treat me. Which isn’t even why my grade sucks. I just don’t care.

MARA: Maybe she was trying to spin it like, yeah people could be weird about one
thing, but at least they can’t say you’re dumb. There are plenty of kids who can’t throw a
ball to save their lives who are treated just fine.

DELL: I’m not dumb though! I’m super smart! I just don’t have the grades to prove it.
MARA: I’m not saying you’re dumb, look at all the research you’ve done for that.

DELL: I almost wish it was for class, then people could see… nah who am I kidding, if it
was for a grade / I’d drop it immediately

MARA: In a rush Are you actually gay??? Or is that just / what people… say.

DELL: SHH / shh shh- She looks back towards her door.

MARA: Speaks in a lower volume I’m sorry, oh shit, I’m sorry, that came out- not even
wrong, I just shouldn’t have- ah fuck. / Fuck me. I’m an idiot. What was I thinking?

DELL: “What people say?” What have people / said?

MARA: Nothing, like, specific! Like, I promise, no one is talking- I just.

I mean.
Sarah tries to run to the locker room before you so that you aren’t there when
she’s changing-

DELL: Sarah C or Sarah H?

MARA: H

DELL: loudly Fuck that bitch.

MARA: Still whispering I mean, yeah, she also doesn’t like it when people breathe too
hard, she calls it aggressive, but like, I don’t know. The general… vibe.

DELL: Vibe?

MARA: I think people can just tell.

I’m sorry.
Still whispering. Wait, weren’t your parents both at work?

DELL: … Yeah. She relaxes just a little.

MARA: It doesn’t matter to- I have a gay uncle. He’s not actually related to me, he’s a
very close friend of the family, but.
You can be honest, I’m not-
DELL: I didn’t say you were, I just-
Ugh.
I don’t know. I don’t know!
I’m just me. And I like me.
I like how I look. I like who I like.
People just don’t like it when you’re confident in something when they think you
should be ashamed.
Plus there’s nothing they can do to stop me.
But they can point out that I’m the only one here who feels that way. They can
point out that I’m alone.
They can create an atmosphere that always makes me alone.
And so you’re stuck, you either agree with them and hate yourself and try to
press yourself into something smaller until one day you’re too small and you explode
and die.
Or you can just… not care about them, or anything, and maybe one day
something will change.

Beat.

MARA slowly reaches out and puts her hand on DELL’s back, spreading out her fingers
like she’s making a handprint. DELL stays very still, not used to physical touch, but
slowly lets herself relax into it. She craves this kind of intimacy, even just a hand on the
back.

DELL: Maybe that’s why you were mad at me that day.

MARA: With the caves?

DELL: Yeah. I was too confident. It leaks out sometimes.

MARA: I think I’m always mad at something.

DELL: Really?

MARA: Yeah.
I’m mad at people who don’t work as hard as me.
Because I work really hard to not disappoint people.
My parents, they keep saying, “Mara, you’re the best! You can do anything!”
 “Of course you’re going to win that contest, or get that A, because why wouldn’t
you?”
And I get mad at them for lying to me, because I don’t feel what they’re saying.
They just pasted their compliments on top of my skin when there’s really nothing
underneath. Like I’m made of paper mache.
And I get mad at people who actually have something in them, like you, because
no matter how hard I work, nothing's gonna fill me up.
And people keep pasting more layers on me, and one day I’m gonna shatter and
everyone will see it’s just hollow inside.

DELL: … I think you got a lot of substance.

MARA: You’re just saying-

DELL: You’re sitting here talking to me. Sarah fuckin’ H runs out of the room.
If nothing else, you seem to see things through to the end.

MARA: Heh, yeah.

DELL: Are you mad at me now?

MARA: No. I think it’s the nuclear pit now. I had never thought of, like, the waste. We all
know nuclear weapons are bad but I kinda figured we would just… stop making them.

DELL: It’s a weird thing to think about.

MARA: And then, yeah, people aren’t going to speak our language. They might not
know what nuclear radiation is. Every possible solution has an equally possible
problem-

DELL: Well, maybe a big enough scary sculpture will scare people away-

MARA: Take Beowulf, for example. What we’re studying right now. That was only from,
what, 2,000 years ago? And we barely understand / that English

DELL: Don’t drag Beowulf like that he can’t defend himself

MARA: You know what I mean. We only know what it says cause a bunch of monks
thought it was important enough to translate over and over. And they did that because it
was a fun story. Science, deadly science? How on earth do we convey that?
DELL: What if Beowulf was a huge warning about monsters in Scandinavia that are
definitely just hibernating and will come back?

MARA: Huh?

DELL: Like, at the end, the dragon and Beowulf are just put back in the ground.
What if they were burying this crazy radioactive dragon and passed the message
along with this huge story so that we would know better than to go digging stuff up?
Like what I’m working on?
“The center of danger is here, of a particular size and shape, below us.”

MARA: Then man, we really missed the point of that poem.

Sc. 6

The bus stop. DELL arrives first, bopping to her tunes. She really gets into it, despite it
being early.

MARA slowly enters with her coffee, earbuds in. She’s tired. She watches DELL dance,
a goofy smile growing across her face.

DELL catches MARA watching, and jumps, stops, and laughs. She extends her hands,
wanting MARA to dance with her. MARA shakes her head, holding her coffee up as an
excuse. DELL pouts, continues dancing, with one hand still extended. MARA sighs and
puts her coffee down, then slowly starts dancing to her own music, trying to match
DELL’s rhythm.

They begin an intricate dance, DELL trying to get MARA to dance with her, MARA
acquiescing, DELL becoming overwhelmed with brief physical contact, MARA pressing
forward, DELL pressing forward, MARA moving away. All while listening to two different
songs.

MARA turns to look down the road, to see if the bus is coming. To get her attention
back, DELL puts her hand on her back, extending her fingers, like making a handprint.
MARA freezes.

DELL quickly withdraws her hand. She overstepped. That was way too intimate, way
too fast. Fuck. She stuffs her hands in her pockets. Tries to bop along to her music, play
it off like it didn’t mean anything. MARA turns and studies DELL. The bus arrives.
Sc. 7

DELL’s backyard. DELL has a sketchpad and is sketching, sitting down. This is her safe
space. MARA enters. She sits down next to DELL, who turns and looks at her. MARA
doesn’t make eye contact, just stares out at the horizon.

MARA: I had a dream last night.

I was out in the desert, past the river, past the highway. The sky looked different.
It was red and orange, but all over. It didn't fade into blue and black like it does at night.
And there was a huge man next to me, and he had a crown, and he was covered
in handprint tattoos, red and brown. Like paint. I remember thinking, “Oh hey it’s
Beowulf”
And he was walking beside me and just really stamping through the dirt. Almost
like jumping.
So I was like, "Hey, you don't want to do that, this ground is like walking on a big
eggshell" and he was like, "Why" and I said, "If you crack it we'll fall in, it's hollow"
I said that like, more than once. but he kept purposefully hitting the ground, trying
to get it to break.
And then it broke
And we were floating
And falling with us were Hrothgar the king, and Grendel, and Beowulf and the
dragon, and they all had handprints on them too
But they were far away.

She starts to lean on DELL, who is Very Aware they are making physical contact.

Mara: And we fell through dark and it was starting to get hotter and I turned and saw
them all start to fade away bit by bit
Disintegrate
And they were yelling that it hurt, all of them, and I said, "I fuckin’ told you so!"
and I could tell they were really mad at me
But I wasn't dying
I was just falling closer and closer to this heat, and I could feel it getting larger
and larger and I felt like i was going to fall into the sun
But it wasn’t bright.
It was just a dark, humming mass.
And then I woke up.
I was sweating like crazy.

DELL: … wow.
MARA: I had kicked my blankets fully off my bed.

DELL: I only wake up sweaty when I was dreaming about having sex.

MARA: Mm.

DELL: … Have you ever had sex?

MARA: What??

DELL: Sorry, sorry just. Trying to get your mind / off of

MARA: Does mouth stuff count?

DELL: … Sure.

MARA: Then yeah.

DELL: Huh.

MARA: … You haven’t-

DELL: Who says I haven’t?

MARA: Who with???

DELL: You who with???

Beat

DELL: Same time.

MARA: On three.

DELL: One, two, three.

MARA: Simultaneously. One, two three.

Beat
MARA: That’s what I thought.

DELL: with a smile Shut up.

Sc. 8

MARA and DELL sit in chairs, with notebooks. They’re in class. MARA is actively taking
notes, DELL is not. Every once in a while, DELL looks at MARA, or looks like she wants
to try and whisper something. The following information is also seen via PowerPoint
presentation.

GASTROCK: … so the gold is buried deep beneath the Earth. The dragon finds it,
which is important to note, he never collects it himself, but happens upon it, and then
guards it as his hoard for three hundred years. The dragon emerges from the earth,
fights Beowulf, and dies, striking Beowulf fatally as well. The author then gives the
dragon it’s own eulogy, reminding us that even though the dragon was evil, it was a
worthy adversary for Beowulf. Like Grendel and his mother, all the evil they represent
come from man.
In later verses it is said that the treasure is cursed, never to be taken from the pit
unless by the grace of God. In fact, when Wiglaf takes it out for Beowulf to see, it is
dirty, incredibly rusty. Now, do you guys think the treasure is still cursed? Or is the curse
broken?

MARA raises her hand

GASTROCK: Mara?

MARA: It’s still cursed.

GASTROCK: Why?

MARA: Because it is rusted, and Beowulf dies at the end.

GASTROCK continues to talk, but her voice gets distant. DELL gets distracted. The
lights seem to fade, and DELL becomes incredibly interested in her hand. If she places
it on the desk, it seems to leave a print. She turns and sees that wherever MARA has
pressed her hand, there is also a mark.

GASTROCK: That is one interpretation, especially since it would be a stretch to say the
point of the story is Beowulf is God. But his funeral gives us a different ending. Since
Beowulf would rather die than live in shame, he gets an honorable funeral, thus
cementing to those still living that his choices in life were correct.
Sc. 9

DELL’s bedroom. The board is a little more crowded, with more drawings. DELL sits,
drawing in her sketchpad. MARA sits nearby, laptop out, but she’s not looking at it.

DELL: But yeah I mean, the author slide is done, obviously. Like I said, that took two
seconds. After I’m done with this, I’ll jump on Wikipedia and summarize the plot. Luckily
Gastrock said she didn’t want, like, a super long plot recap, since we all read it in class.

MARA: Yeah.

DELL: And the characters, like, we got those. That’s really up to interpretation and what
other people say they represent, right?

MARA: As long as there’s a good argument behind what they mean, yeah.

DELL: Plus Gastrock said that we were gonna go over that stuff in class sometime so
honestly we could hold off on those until the end and then put it together from class
notes-

MARA: Yeah, that all sounds good.

DELL: I’m just keeping you updated. Cause I know… you tend to work ahead and I
don’t, so I don’t want you to worry.

MARA: You’re fine, no worries.

DELL glances over at MARA’s laptop.

DELL: … How’s… the themes and stuff going?

MARA: I’m still… working on it.

DELL: That’s what I say when I haven’t started.

MARA: fessing up. I haven’t started.

DELL: Yeah?

MARA: Yeah I just can’t seem to start anything. It’s been like this all day.
DELL: You just tired?

MARA: Yeah, I guess so.

DELL: Well there’s nothing wrong with a break.

She looks at her drawing.

DELL: This is actually turning out pretty good. Quietly I’m the best.

They work in silence for a moment. MARA stares off into space, eventually staring at
the drawings on DELL’s cork board. DELL eventually notices MARA not doing anything,
just looking at the board.

DELL: Do you… want anything? Water? My mom just went grocery shopping so we got
snacks-

MARA: No, no that’s fine.

DELL: I feel like I have to entertain you if you aren’t working on-

MARA: Should I leave?

DELL: No! No, I just. I never see you… not. Doing work. Even during class you’re
always working ahead, it’s why I never bother to talk to you there.

MARA: I’m so tired of-

I don’t want to be the one always looking down at her desk, not seeing anything
else.
I literally have a 98 in this class right now. None of the colleges I’ve been
accepted to care about my graduating GPA. I could do nothing, in any class, for the last
month of school, and still graduate. I did the math.

DELL: Oh. Huh.

MARA: Besides, I never see you doing work.

DELL: That’s cause I’m smart. I strategize.

MARA: Strategize?

DELL: Why do it now when I know I usually can finish it on the bus ride over? Or while
Mr. Miller is lecturing during History? Or during lunch? Plus most of these assignments
don’t really hold any weight, they’re only worth three or five points. As long as I do ok on
the tests, I don’t have to do homework.

MARA: What if you don’t do well on the tests?

DELL: I didn’t say well, I said ok. C’s get degrees. You learn a lot in class through
osmosis, as long as you aren’t actively sleeping you should be ok.

MARA: Is that why you talk a lot? To make sure you don’t fall asleep?

DELL: Hey, who says I’d fall asleep if I wasn’t talking?

MARA: Heh.

DELL: You do seem kinda tired.

You can take a nap if you need to, I won’t mind.

MARA: I should be fine. I’ve been having issues getting to sleep.

DELL: Yeah?

MARA: I think you made me think too hard.

DELL: Me? Nervous About what?

MARA: That waste pit out in the desert.

DELL: Relief Oh.

MARA: It’s... scary stuff. It reminds me of when I’d learn about a monster as a kid and
stay up late at night, convinced it was outside the door.
I know that’s not rational, but still.

DELL: The waste isn’t going to get up and get you, Mara.

MARA: It’s not even the waste itself! It’s the whole sign problem!
DELL: The… signs scare you? I can take them down-

MARA: No! I just-

I just start going down a tunnel, you know? It’s such a huge problem. Worrying
about people thousands of years from now; I’m busy enough worrying about myself.
Look at everything. It feels like we’re standing at the end of everything right now, what
with global warming and politics and diseases and...
I’m probably not going to live long.
And that’s not through lack of trying, I work hard. I like working hard and I know I
do it well. I should be fine. But the way things are going? Even here, in our backyard,
we have tens of thousands of tons of toxic waste under our feet.
And I watched that documentary you recommended. They said it wasn’t a matter
of “if” if leaked but “when.”
A fucking sign isn’t going to save them from this, this isn’t a good solution. What
is wrong with us? We thought this power that absolutely destroys our bodies was
something we should try and control? And because of this we’ve doomed people, who
we will never, ever know, to this painful fate.
People far in the future are already dead.
And in the space between them and me I’m dead.
And I’m dead as early as tomorrow.
What happens then?
It’s just… dark.
We don’t know what happens after.
If our consciousness keeps going.
If we have to answer for what we did here.
Or if we just float off and never see anyone we love again, and we might just stay
asleep, and never remember or see or do anything ever again
I don’t like knowing that I might one day forget. And that everything I’ve done is
for absolutely nothing.

DELL: What you’ve done isn’t for nothing-

MARA: Then what is it for?

Getting into a good school?
Getting a good job?
None of that will even be here at the end of the day; sometimes the things you do
don’t even matter a few years down the line.
You can’t look at me and tell me that anything I do is permanent.
I’m going to die and be forgotten.
 You are going to die and be forgotten.
And one day that sludge that’s in that pit is going to leak out or accidentally get
poked too hard and it’s going to explode and kill everything that is left. If there is
anything left.
Everything will be gone.

Beat.

DELL: You’re right. That is scary.

MARA: And I wake up with those thoughts and they live in my stomach like sludge all
day.
It’s why I can’t bring myself to do waves at her notebook.
I like to plan ahead but it’s like I’ve lost the ability to.
Why care if it’s pointless?

DELL: … Maybe the things you do aren’t permanent, like, on stone. For the rest of
human history, however long that is.
But don’t think that the things you do aren’t permanent to me.

They look at each other. They realize they’re close, like, real close. DELL takes MARA’s
hand and presses her own against it, not intertwining the fingers, but pressing them
together like the handprint motions from earlier.

DELL: Maybe nothing matters.

A lot of things really don’t.
Nothing valued is here.
But for like, one second, could we pretend right now matters?

MARA is the one who takes the plunge. She intertwines her fingers in DELL’s, pulls her
closer and kisses her.
Sc. 10

The bus stop. The next day. DELL jogs up, earbuds not in. The hand that MARA took
the night before looks like it was pressed into red dust; the palm of her hand is stained a
reddish-brown. It will remain this way for the rest of the play. DELL doesn’t see MARA,
she turns around and faces where their houses are. After a few seconds, she realizes
she isn’t playing it cool, so she turns around and readjusts her hair. Tries to find the
most “natural” position possible while still looking good. Stays in place for long enough
that it feels awkward. She debates turning around, then finally whirls around, hoping to
see MARA. She sees nothing. She slams her open palm against the bus stop pole,
wincing in pain. A handprint is left on the pole. She hears the bus coming, she turns to
watch it slowly come down the highway as she holds her hand. MARA runs on,
obviously flustered and running late. The hand she used to hold DELL’s also looks like it
was pressed and stained by a blackish-brown dust. It will remain this way for the rest of
the play. The bus arrives, MARA hops on before DELL can say anything.
Sc. 11

The backyard. MARA is already sitting out here, gazing at the horizon. After a few
seconds, she puts her thumb out, trying to see what DELL sees. She doesn’t know what
to look for, however, she doesn’t know how to position her hand. She sighs and puts her
hand down, continuing to look at the horizon. DELL walks on, holding her sketch pad.
She stands behind MARA, in disbelief that MARA is just sitting there.

DELL: Mara, what the fuck?

MARA: Hm?

DELL: What the fuck! Today! All day! English!

MARA: Are you mad-

DELL: That you didn’t talk to me all day? / Or acknowledge me all day? Yeah, a little!

MARA: I was busy, ok? It’s not like- look. Let’s not make it a thing. / It wasn’t anything
serious.

DELL: Oh, let’s not make it a thing? Let’s not make it a thing, / she says

MARA: You’re being childish. Normal people don’t make a thing about one / makeout
session

DELL: It IS a thing! For me!

I’ve never been able to do that!
You and everyone else fucking has!
And because we DID, when no one here ever fucking has before, / that
DEFINITELY makes it a Thing.

MARA: It’s not a Thing if we don’t talk about it, not make a big deal-

DELL: That’s not what / I want-

MARA: What did you want me to do??? Suddenly become your best friend in class, talk
to you all fucking day, / because that would be so obviously weird
DELL: You could’ve said literally anything! You could have even just made fucking eye
contact instead of pretending to take notes! I was having a heart attack all day because
I thought you hated me, that you had told everyone!

MARA: Why on earth would I tell everyone when I was also there???

DELL: I DON’T KNOW!

MARA: STOP YELLING.

DELL: Lowering her voice I AM ALLowed to yell I am allowed to be pissed at you-

MARA: You think I wanted to talk about that at school? Where, as you pointed out,
people could find out?

DELL: You could have made eye contact or SOMETHING! During class, you wouldn’t
even look at me!

MARA: They would have been able to / tell.

DELL: What. Catch / the “vibe?”

MARA: I don’t know, smell it? Or feel it? Because I’m feeling-

DELL: Yeah, you were feeling last night, all right.

MARA: You’re so you! You could handle that kind of thing, but I need you to be as small
as I am for a second so you know how this feels!

DELL: There’s nothing to handle! No one would -

MARA: Shut up! Just shut up for a second!

They could see the difference, I know it!
At lunch, all my friends could tell I was feeling… off. I just said I was sick.

DELL: offended Sick?

MARA: You don’t feel it?

This stinging feeling inside?
 I woke up this morning and after lying frozen until I almost missed the bus, I
realized, ah, this must be how Dell feels every damn day.

DELL: You’re disgusted.

MARA: Ashamed.

DELL: Of me.

MARA: Don’t you feel the same way?!

DELL: Should I?!

MARA: Yes!

Beat.

DELL: You’re right, we can’t be a Thing.

I’m not stupid.
You don’t have to do a single damn thing.
But for once I need to care about something.
Don’t pretend it didn’t happen. Please.

It is getting closer to twilight now. Stars are starting to appear above the horizon.

MARA: disbelief You need it that much?

DELL: breathless Yes.

MARA: I thought you were so brave.

DELL: I thought I was too.

MARA: I guess we were wrong.

Beat. DELL can’t look at MARA. They look at the sky instead. The constellations come
out and dance.

DELL: What does the sky make you feel?

MARA: What?

DELL: Big or small?

MARA: Small.

DELL: See, it makes me feel big. Cause I can reach my hands up and either piece
together constellations or blot them out. Cover half the sky.

MARA: How human.

DELL: Ha, right?

You ever make up constellations?

MARA: No, my dad knows all the real ones. He taught me them when I was little.
He would take me out in the yard and tell me all the stories, if there were any.
Lots of heroes who slew big evils. I guess we like telling the same stories.
My dad knows a bunch from all different cultures. Greek, Mexican, a few Indian.
My mom wanted to make sure they were multicultural, and that the women were
well represented.
But in all of them the main characters act the same.
Some evil thing is found, and they have to kill it or trap it.
Sometimes it was like, a moral, but sometimes it was a real monster.

DELL: Like in the sky.

MARA: Yeah.

DELL: I never learned the real ones. Me and mom would make them up.
We’d make people and families and give them all names.
It was better than tv for a five year old.

MARA: There are people in the real ones.

That one is the easiest to see. Orion. She points above their heads, a little to the
right.

DELL: The three in a row, right? His belt?

MARA: Yeah, and he’s holding a bow.

DELL: Hero of the sky.

MARA: Could your hand blot him out?

DELL sticks her hand up and tries to cover him up. The constellation Orion moves, and
starts fighting a massive, undefined cluster of stars.

DELL: It’s either him or the dragon he’s fighting, pick one.

MARA: He’s not fighting a-

DELL: That’s one I made up.

MARA: Ha.

DELL: … I guess the sky can make me feel small.

MARA: I should head back in. I’m sure my parents are wondering why I’m sitting out in
the dark.

DELL: What are you going to tell them?

MARA: That we were talking about our presentation.

DELL: Are we going to-

MARA: What?

DELL: Are we going back to the way we were, after this?

MARA: …

DELL: You started talking to me because you were mad. And now you’re scared. Is
there a world where you aren’t either and we can just be… doesn’t want to say
“together,” but doesn’t want to say “just friends” either. Tries to find a word that isn’t
charged. Fails.

MARA: I started talking to you cause I cared too much and you cared too little. I’m
talking to you now and it’s switched. Let’s just… see what happens.
MARA shrugs. She gives an awkward little wave and exits. DELL stays, looking up at
the sky. The stars stop. She suddenly feels very small and twisted up.
Sc. 12

The bus stop. MARA is there. She is jittery, and it’s not from the coffee she’s holding.
She keeps glancing down the road. DELL walks up.

DELL: Hey.

MARA: Hey.

Beat.

DELL: So what’s the deal today?

MARA: Huh?

DELL: Like, what are you planning- what’s the move. So I’m not surprised.

MARA: I’m not going to do… anything?

DELL: I mean I know-

MARA: We’re working on this presentation together. We can be friendly because of that.

DELL: Yeah.

MARA: I will try not to be bristly.

DELL: And I won’t be eager. Deal?

MARA: Deal.

They shake hands. They turn and watch the bus arrive.
Sc. 13

DELL’s bedroom. DELL and MARA’s laptops are out, forgotten, because they are
passionately making out. There are a few more handprints/fingerprints on them, up and
down their arms, maybe around their faces. These will stay there for the rest of the play.

DELL: Shouldn’t we-

MARA: Hmm?

DELL: … it’s due tomorrow.

They both turn and look at the discarded laptops.

MARA: I mean-

DELL: I mean, trust me, I don’t want to stop-

MARA: No neither do I-

DELL: But like, I don’t want-

MARA: My grade is fine, I did-

DELL: I know your math. I’m sure your math is fine-

MARA: Are you concerned about your-

DELL: I mean, only if we got like, a zero-

MARA: But we wouldn’t-

DELL: Exactly.

Beat

DELL: I’m just worried-

MARA: About what??? Isn’t this like, exactly what you wanted?
She strikes a pose, poorly

DELL: I mean, not this specific, but like, yes, in general, yeah-

MARA: Then what’s-

DELL: Won’t it be weird?

MARA: What?

DELL: If you, of all people, don’t get this done.

MARA: sighs Yeah. How much do you have-

DELL: I mean. The author one.

MARA: You said that a few days ago-

DELL: Look, I can still finish all of my half if we power through it now.

MARA: What about your signs?

DELL: Hmm?

MARA: For the pit, when are those due? Those are more important, right?

DELL: They’re not due tomorrow.

MARA: In general. I want to know when I can see the finished product, before you win
that money.

DELL: Like, five days from now. So you’ll see them. And don’t say I’ll win, that’ll jinx it.

MARA: That’s not how that works.

DELL: Listen, it’s enough money to pay for a whole semester with no loans, I’m not
taking any chances.

DELL grabs MARA’s laptop and hands it to her.

DELL: The sooner it’s done, the sooner we could get back to… you know.

MARA: How presumptuous.

DELL: Don’t you-?

MARA: We’ll see. A homework break might get me thinking again.

DELL: mainly to her computer You’re the one who was freaking out about people being
able to just guess. A big part of that is covering tracks and acting normal enough people
don’t start thinking.

MARA: Covering tracks?

DELL: Making sure you aren’t looking at anyone in the halls. Incognito browsers, no
search history. That’s mainly for me here at home, not that my parents even pry that
much. But still.

MARA: Do your parents… ?

DELL: I think my dad does.

…
Back when I was learning to drive,
We’d just head west, then loop up north, and drive home through town.
So I could get a feel for driving just in general before being surrounded by other
cars.
We were just driving along, making jokes. Listening to The Killers.
He had given me one of his cigarettes, and we both had the windows down,
smoking.
I forget what we were talking about.
But he was looking out at the road, and he said, “Your mom is being rather silly.”
And I go, “Yeah?”
And he goes, “Yeah, she keeps asking when you are going to go out with a boy.”
And it gets quiet for a minute.
He quickly covers it with, “Now, that’s the opposite of a problem, why would she
want you going out with boys? I’m happy to have my little angel at home.”
But I had stopped listening, even as he rambled on.
I didn’t even say, like, “I don’t like anyone at school, all the boys are dumb” or
anything like that.
I just kept driving in complete silence.
 Man, I smoked that cigarette in record time. Almost got a nicotine high.
I was trying to calm down, I felt like my chest was writhing in knots-

MARA: Twisted up.

DELL: Yeah!
Yeah.
He eventually noticed. And he kinda just… nodded.
And he said… “You probably won’t listen to me, cause I’m your dad. But if other
people warned you against this… maybe you should listen.”
And he flicked the cigarette out the window.
…
That was when I realized that people here noticed that I knew exactly who I was,
and were thinking and talking about it behind my back.
And that the car, this place, would never stop talking about me.
If my Dad was, then who else?
Only if I got like, a full fresh start would people just. See me as someone who
was calm. And confident. And out.

MARA: And you think… Albuquerque will be that place?

DELL: Hmm?

MARA: I mean, University of New Mexico isn’t exactly… far. It’s the same state. You
think it’ll-

DELL: Listen, It’s bigger though. There’s a queer student union.

I don’t know,
“The center of danger is here.”
It’s gotta be better than this.
I mean- that came out wrong.

MARA: Well I mean, I wouldn’t get my hopes up.

DELL: Hmm?

MARA: Like, don’t put all your eggs in one basket. It might not be any different.

DELL: What, does your school have something way better?

MARA: One, I haven’t chosen my school, you know that. Two, it just seems like you’re
going to end up hurt if you go into college thinking it’s going to be this dream world
where you are going to be fully respected and loved just because you’re At College.

DELL: I’m not being dumb, Mara, I’m being hopeful!

MARA: But why bother if you’ll get hurt so bad if it doesn’t work out that way? And it
ends up lonely? And sad? And twisted up?

MARA pushes her finger into DELL’s chest, leaving a visible print.

DELL: I don’t feel twisted up.

MARA: Yes you do, you just said so.

I mean, take me for example.
I cared so much about every little thing, to the point where I was getting angry at
you for not caring about caves!
Caves that probably didn’t actually mean anything to them then.
They probably painted on those walls cause they were bored-

DELL: Takes MARA’s hand. You aren’t doing this because you’re bored, are you?

MARA: Withdraws her hand. No. In fact I kind of like having something to distract me
from how invested in school I was.

DELL: Yeah?

MARA: Yeah, it’s a wake up call.

DELL: In more ways than one, haha.

MARA: What?

DELL: Like, yeah, the school thing. The attitudes thing. But also like.
You… like women now.
Congratulations! Join the club! We have pins!

MARA: Let’s not get excited-

DELL: As the one queer in Loving, New Mexico, it is a privilege to welcome you-
MARA: Didn’t you hear me? I don’t want to get excited-

DELL: You’re thinking too much about other people, can’t you just let yourself be
happy?

MARA: No! I mean- THAT came out wrong. Ugh.

DELL: We’re both really fuckin bad at this.

MARA: I’m sorry.

DELL: Hey, it’s no worries. None at all.

MARA: Thank you for being a good listener.

DELL: I like listening for once.

MARA: I keep fucking up.

DELL: Don’t talk like that.

Listen
Hey, I need you to listen.
“This is a message, pay attention to it!”
You aren’t fucking up as much as you think / you are.

MARA: Say it again.

DELL: What?

MARA: flirtatious That you need me-

DELL: Pfft, yeah. Ok.

MARA: I’ve never been needed before!

DELL: And I’ve never needed. What a pair we are.

MARA: For right now, anyway.

DELL: Isn’t that all we have?

MARA nods.
Sc. 14

The classroom. DELL and MARA sit at desks. MARA seems a little more slouched, she
isn’t writing anything. The class notes are projected above them, like before. The print
where MARA poked DELL’s chest from the last scene is still there, and has grown
larger, like several thumbprints pressed together to form a circle.

GASTROCK: So, the dragon symbolizes evil, something that needs to be destroyed,
living deep beneath the earth. The dragon also calls back to the story’s Pagan roots,
showing it as something natural that is inevitable, and will have to be faced.
This is in direct conflict to what the poet was taught, as by the time Beowulf was
written, Scandinavia had mainly converted to Christianity. We can see the struggle of
the poet to reconcile what he had been taught: that evil needs to be destroyed by good
and is only brought about by a direct connection to Satan, while also remaining faithful
to the story in front of him.
Now, can anyone tell me any of the ways the poet balances these two?

Beat. MARA continues looking down at her desk. DELL promptly raises her hand.
Participation grade, baby.

GASTROCK: Dell?

DELL: Um, the dragon gets killed by Beowulf. But, Beowulf dies too. But Beowulf
doesn’t come back to life, like Jesus, or whatever, he stays dead. They both get buried,
in kind of a, respectful way.

GASTROCK: That’s certainly one way, anyone else?

GASTROCK trails off. DELL gets up. A shift, she’s talking to Mrs. Gastrock after class.
Behind her, MARA leaves the classroom and rearranges the cork board in DELL’s room
so all the images together look like a black, scribbled mess.

DELL: I just wanted to see if maybe we could present it tomorrow, or at least turn it in,
because some of it is done, and I know something is better than a zero.

GASTROCK: You had a week to complete this, this wasn’t a difficult assignment.

DELL: I know-

GASTROCK: How much do each of you have done?

DELL: Well we split it up, I’d say it’s about… half-

GASTROCK: How much did Mara do?

DELL: I don’t know how much she got done.

GASTROCK: What did you manage to get done?

DELL: The author slide is done. The dragon slide is done. But I know we could talk on it!
At least get the presentation points-

GASTROCK: I’m disappointed in you Dell. We both know you don’t take work seriously-

DELL: I was taking this seriously!

GASTROCK: But it’s another thing to make a student like Mara suffer for your inability
to plan and delegate time properly.

DELL: Just cause I sometimes don’t get stuff done doesn’t mean all of a sudden, cause
she’s sitting next to me, she’s a slacker too.

GASTROCK: Then how come she hasn’t turned in anything for the past week? And
seems preoccupied in class?

DELL: I… I don’t know.

GASTROCK: Has she mentioned anything to you?

DELL: No, no, we aren’t- we aren’t close. We have one class together. That’s all.

GASTROCK: I just hate to see your actions being a bad influence on good students.

DELL: Her working with me isn’t a bad- being exposed to me doesn’t make her different,
or bad, Gastrock. / Maybe this was going to happen either way, it’s always been there,
and you shouldn’t blame me-

GASTROCK: I don’t like your tone, Dell. You can either calm down and talk about this
like an adult or you can leave and expect to talk to the principal tomorrow.
DELL: I’m sorry, I’m not trying to- ugh. She takes a deep breath.
Please.
I don’t know if I’ll graduate if this zero stays in there.
I know that I’m not a good student, and I’m not a good classmate, and I’m barely
good at anything, but let me try to be good at this? Fessing up? Even when I got more
done-

GASTROCK: Dell. I guess you’re just going to have to work hard to make up for it.

DELL: … fine. It doesn’t matter. Her grades are perfect anyway.

MARA has finished her work on the board. DELL exits from the classroom, making her
way back to her bedroom, rubbing and looking down at her hand, seeing it stained for
the first time. She enters, sees the black hole on the corkboard. She’s not mad that
anything has been moved, but she looks at the void.

As the lights go down, the handprints start to glow a greenish blue in the dark. All the
smudges over DELL and MARA form constellations on their skin. DELL looks down and
sees the smudges on her chest for the first time, and is frightened by them.

Blackout.
Sc. 15

The backyard. A few days later. DELL stands, her sketchpad and pencils are on the
ground next to her. She turns and looks out at the horizon, squinting her eyes against
the low sun. The place where MARA poked her chest now seems to have a full palm-
print on it, instead of a series of fingerprints, like a black void on her chest. MARA
enters.

MARA: Hey!

DELL: Hey, what’s up?

MARA: Oh, nothing, I just wanted to… check in.

DELL: Yeah, yeah.

Beat. DELL’s been avoiding MARA. MARA is feeling a little guilty. Time to talk, I guess.

MARA: … I’m sorry I didn’t get my half of the presentation done. Maybe Mrs. Gastrock
would’ve given us partial credit if I had.

DELL: It’s not like I did all of my work either.

MARA: Is your grade ok?

DELL: Not gonna lie. Not really.

MARA: Oh.

DELL: Yeah.

MARA: If you want, I can calculate what you have to get on the final to pull your grade
up. You know, some good grade math.

DELL: I’m already working on it.

MARA: And?

DELL: I… don’t know yet. It might be possible. I probably have to get a perfect score,
though.
MARA: I wouldn't worry too much, you can still walk if you’re only short by one class.
Summer school is a thing, ya know.

DELL: Ugh.

MARA: … I thought for sure I was gonna get a, “Is everything ok at home?” speech from
Mrs. Gastrock, but she didn’t say anything!

DELL: Yeah?

MARA: Yeah, I mean, I still have an A in the class. I think she gets it. Didn’t even ask
how much we got done or anything. On the homework we had for today, she handed it
back, and I got a five out of five, obviously, and on it was a note that was like, “Glad to
see you back to your hardworking self!”
Which, of course, is so rude. Kinda throws you under the bus.

DELL: Fuckin’ bitch.

MARA: Hey, listen. Gastrock will be Gastrock. No use worrying about it.

DELL: Hrmm.

Beat.

MARA: … I figured out where I’m going to college!

DELL: Oh?

MARA: Stanford.

DELL: Stanford.

MARA: Yep. Ally isn’t the only one going to California.

DELL: What are you studying?

MARA: I’m going in undeclared. I’ll figure it out eventually.

DELL: Won’t it be harder to get scholarships if you don’t have a major?

MARA: Yeah, but I mean. I don’t really… need them.

DELL: So after all of… did you change your mind?

MARA: What?

DELL: All that talk of… none of this matters? Not looking forward to things? What
happened to -

MARA: I still think all that.

DELL: You’re going to fucking STANFORD.

MARA: That just kind of happened! I don’t know, my parents and everyone are
expecting me / to go somewhere and this seems like the, the path with least resistance?

DELL: That’s fuckin rich. You can just float into a university that’s ranked top ten in the
country. Wow, what a decision. What an accomplishment.

MARA: Why are you-

DELL: You spent last week moping in my room, filled with fuckin’ existential angst about
the futility of our actions, getting ME in trouble with Gastrock because you can’t bring
yourself to do anything, and without even trying you just get to GO to Stanford?

MARA: Hey, I work fucking hard, ok? I know that’s a foreign concept to you-

DELL: A big burst I work so hard!!! It just never fucking matters!!! I didn’t turn in the
fucking sculptures!

MARA: What?

DELL: I sat in my room trying to turn in the project.

And I couldn’t bring myself to open my laptop.
Send in all the work I had done.
And I didn’t.
I was just sitting in the dark, watching it get farther and farther away.
Cause I kept thinking about what you said.
How can I look forward to something that’s already dust?
 And how I had put all this weight on going to college, and how that isn’t going to
save me.
Or us or the people living here thousands of years from now.
And I felt myself sinking.
Until it was 11:59pm, and I couldn’t turn it in anymore.
And if I can’t even do that, well…
…
I’m just really scared now.

MARA: You don’t need to worry about that, Dell.

It doesn’t matter-

DELL: It did matter though, to me.

I thought caring about you, this, would make me feel bigger and fill me with more
motivation but now…
Everything has the potential to hurt, and they do.
You gave me the sludge that’s twisting you up.

MARA: I didn’t give you anything-

DELL: You made me smaller, Mara. I can’t really explain but…

I wasn’t afraid before.
And now I am.

MARA: The project finally hit you.

DELL: Not the nuclear waste!

Me! This!
You made me feel like you!
Small.
Twisted.

MARA: I have no idea what you’re talking about-

DELL: I don’t think I can hang out with you anymore.

Beat.

MARA: What?
DELL: In a perfect world I’d be thanking you and sticking by you no matter what,
because you got me to care about things and I finally got to feel excited, when I’d never
felt excited about anything before!
But now you’re trying to drag me back.
Telling me it doesn’t matter when it does-

MARA: I’m trying to make you feel better-

DELL: You aren’t making it better you’re making me and my grades / worse!

MARA: Oh, you’re blaming me for you not turning in something on time?
That’s funny.
You’re putting this all on me like the last week wasn’t the happiest you’ve been /
in a long time, fuck the grades!

DELL: I’m not blaming you for me not being able to turn something in!

MARA: Then what are you mad at me for??

DELL: You’re trying to make me not care about something I’ve learned to care so much
about! Go back on everything that’s happened!
I can’t live like that.
If I’m different now, I gotta own that.

MARA: Dell-

DELL: No, I’m talking now, it won’t all get out otherwise.
I’m trying to tell you-
You can’t bring me to where you are because you’re lonely.
I’ve already come out, I can’t do it again.
I think you really do need someone to talk to about all of this.
But I also think it can’t be me.
It’s not healthy for me to be that for you, and I tried, I really did.
You, you don’t even want me around because you want to be with me,
You like seeing someone else as freaked out as you are.

Beat. MARA knows DELL is right.

MARA: Bitterly So that’s that.

The dragon defeated.
DELL: You’re not a-
Sighs.
I really don’t think you mean it.
I think… it takes a lot to fix something toxic inside of you.
But we still both have a lot of time.

MARA: But not right now.

DELL: I can’t right now.

And that sucks!
For the first time, ever, I felt like all the pieces fit.
And someone understood.

MARA: I still do.

DELL: In a way.

They stand, looking at each other. MARA turns, unable to look at DELL anymore. DELL
slowly reaches out, placing her hand on MARA’s back, spreading her fingers out like a
handprint. MARA does not move away, nor does she turn around.

DELL: I think you can work through it.

I want you to.
I have to, now.
Gestures back, towards where their houses are. It’s really hard going back to the
cave.
And we’re both gonna go do it because right now we have to.
But that doesn’t mean we gotta stay in there.
One day we’ll be able to live so loudly out in the sun.
The radiation out in that pit is gonna heal, eventually.
And humans a long time from now might find it and not know about the poison
that was once in there, and decide the pit is worth exploring.
Maybe even worth painting on.

DELL removes her hand. A vibrant handprint is emblazoned on MARA’s back. MARA
might not know it’s there for a long time, but DELL studies it as MARA exits. DELL turns
out towards the horizon, placing her outstretched hand on the black smudge that’s on
her chest. When she takes it away, the hole is still there, but a handprint is trying to fill
up the dark.
The sun sets. The stars come out.

End of play.