Lesson 1.pptx
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The document discusses various topics related to gender, sexuality, and relationships. It begins by defining key terms like gender, sexuality, and psychosocial. It then discusses three psychological domains - affective, behavior, and cognition. It explores concepts like self-awareness, intimacy, socialization, and different types of love. Specifically, it outlines Sternberg's triangular theory of love and describes the primary types (eros, ludus, storge) and secondary types (agape, mania, pragma) of love. It also discusses Chapman's five love languages - words of affirmation, quality time, physical touch, acts of service, and receiving gifts.
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Lesson 1.pptx
- 1. Gender and Society Pedro A. Arongat, PhD Professor Gender and Sexuality as Psychosocial Issue
- 2. What does psychosocial Mean? Psychological- pertains to anything associated with mental process and behavior Social- pertains to anything associated with human relationships, connection and interaction.
- 3. The psychology of gender and sexuality anchors itself on the field of psychology. Psychology is the field of science which concerns itself with how people think and feel and how thoughts interact and lead to behavior
- 4. 3 Psychological domains Affective Domain- pertains to people’s emotion and feelings Behavior- People’s actions Cognition- people’s thought processes such as memory, perception, and information processing
- 5. Self-awareness "Self-awareness is the ability to focus on yourself and how your actions, thoughts, or emotions do or don't align with your internal standards. If you're highly self-aware, you can objectively evaluate yourself, manage your emotions, align your behavior with your values, and understand correctly how others perceive you."
- 6. Two states of self-awareness • Public self-awareness: Being aware of how we can appear to others. Because of this consciousness, we are more likely to adhere to social norms and behave in ways that are socially acceptable. • While there are benefits to this type of awareness, there is also the danger of tipping into self-consciousness. Those who are especially high in this trait may spend too much time worrying about what others think of them.
- 7. • Private self-awareness: Being able to notice and reflect on one’s internal state. Those who have private self-awareness are introspective, approaching their feelings and reactions with curiosity. • For example, you may notice yourself tensing up as you are preparing for an important meeting. Noticing the physical sensations and correctly attributing them to your anxiety about the meeting would be an example of private self-awareness.
- 8. Intimacy and relationship Human relationship –a bond formed between two or more people, manifested through communication and interaction. Intimacy- the process of knowing others and allowing others to know us.
- 9. Socialization Socialization is a process that introduces people to social norms and customs. This process helps individuals function well in society, and, in turn, helps society run smoothly. Family members, teachers, religious leaders, and peers all play roles in a person's socialization. This process typically occurs in two stages: Primary socialization takes place from birth through adolescence, and secondary socialization continues throughout one's life. Adult socialization may occur whenever people find themselves in new circumstances, especially those in which they interact with individuals whose norms or customs differ from theirs.
- 10. Purpose of Socialization During socialization, a person learns to become a member of a group, community, or society. This process not only accustoms people to social groups but also results in such groups sustaining themselves. On a macro level, socialization ensures that we have a process through which the norms and customs of society are transmitted. Socialization teaches people what is expected of them in a particular group or situation; it is a form of social control.
- 11. Socialization has numerous goals for youth and adults alike. It teaches children to control their biological impulses, such as using a toilet instead of wetting their pants or bed. The socialization process also helps individuals develop a conscience aligned with social norms and prepares them to perform various roles.
- 13. Color wheel of Love
- 14. Primary types of love Within this category of primary types of love, we will find three kinds of love. These are the base for the secondary types. You could compare this module to the three basic colors (yellow, blue and red), when combined in different ways, the rest of the colors come out as a result. The three basic types of love being: Eros, Ludus and Storge. When these three are combined the secondary types of love emerge.
- 15. Eros • Eros was the son of Aphrodite, the goddess of love. Eros is passion, erotic and sexual and is also linked to the modern ‘romantic love‘. • The level of intensity with this type of love is high, it is based on chemistry, pheromones and instinct. • Falling in love, having the urge to share with our partner, to strengthen the bond and the amount of intimacy we have. This is being reinforced by the feelings of lust and love.
- 16. • The traits which belong to Eros according to Lee are: – In search for sexual adventures and variety – Feels ready for the risks accompanied by love – Partners are often strangers in the beginning which evokes excitement – The relationship can be exclusive but not possessive – The relationship is based on a strong physical and emotional connection
- 17. Ludus • Also called childish or playful love, Ludus comes from the Greek word game. It is seeing and interpreting love as a game. Imagine a night out at a bar when you find someone who you can fool around. • With Ludus comes flirtatious behavior. Sex is seen as a sport, a way to be kept entertained. Most definitely not looking for commitment, having fun is the main motivator. As long as there are no strings attached and the relationship is uncomplicated, it is fine. Yet, it can be often chased away if the partner wants to get too intimate.
- 18. • The traits which belong to Ludus are: – Can have multiple partners at the same time – No intentions of falling in love – Sex is being seen as a sport or fun, one night stands, without emotional connections – When things get too serious tends to show the urge to quit the relationship
- 19. Storge • Storge is the Greek word for natural affection, family love or the love between friends. This type of love is highly affectionate. The bond between parent and child. There is strong necessities for loyalty, ‘Blood is thicker than water’. • Within Storge there are many responsibilities, duties and entitlements. Giving the feeling of security in time of need. Within relationships, Eros can be transformed into Storge. This change we see when a relationship tends to be a long lasting one and the lover also truly become friends.
- 20. • Traits that belong to Storge are: – Not based on sexual desires – Quietly possessive yet not overly jealous – Has trust and loyalty as its foundation
- 21. The secondary types of love These are combination between the primary types of love. Eros + Storge = Agape Eros + Ludus = Mania Ludus + Storge = Pragma
- 22. Agape • Selfless, universal and unconditional love. When Agape love arises within a relationship, the couple is ready to face the most difficult obstacles. The relationship is based on an unbreakable commitment and the love is unconditional. Agape lovers see their partners as a blessing and will be willing to go to far lengths for their partners. • Agape love can also arise when you are passionate about something. For instance, charity work and helping strangers, love for nature and the love for religion or spirituality are this type of love.
- 23. The different traits for Agape according to Lee – Can put needs of partner before own – Highly devoted, but neither jealous nor obsessive – Shows unselfish and altruistic behavior
- 24. Mania • Mania is characterized by extreme high and lows. A relationship you can compare to a roller coaster. In many ways it can be stated to the opposite of Agape. Wanting to love in extremes and continuously looking for reassurance from their partners. They have the feeling of ‘needing’ their partner. Mania lovers can become obsessive, jealous and possessive or the complete opposite, extremely distant and reluctant.
- 25. • Recognizable traits for Mania are: • – The line becomes very thin between passionate and obsessive – Expecting to get hurt and feeling anxious about falling in love – Forces partner into showing how they feel towards them, forcing affection and emotion – Quickly becomes overwhelmed when thinking of their partner, expecting the worse – When relationship ends, the lost love is all a person can think of
- 26. Pragma • Pragma is the practical and compatible love, convenience over romance. Passion and emotion take a step back and logic takes over. Important needs and desires get the priority. • To accomplish this, Pragma lovers look at the background of their potential partners. Education, financial capabilities, religious believes and social status all play a role.
- 27. • Recognizable traits for Pragma are: • – Have their preferable types for potential partners – Work with ‘pro and con’ lists before making a move – Every step is highly thought through – Believe compatibility can lead to very happy lives
- 28. One type of love that is not mentioned by Lee but most definitely is a kind of love we come across quite often, is Philautia. This is self-love. Under this category, we measure self-esteem, our own worth, our cognitive state and our self- confidence.
- 30. • Intimacy: the closeness each partner feels to the other and the strength of the bond that binds them together. Partners high in intimacy like, value and understand their partners. • Passion: based on romantic feelings, physical attraction for and sexual intimacy with the partner. • Decision/Commitment: represents cognitive factors such as acknowledging that one is in love and has a commitment to maintaining the relationships
- 32. 1. Liking in this case is not used in a trivial sense. Sternberg says that this intimate liking characterizes true friendships, in which a person feels a bondedness, a warmth, and a closeness with another but not intense passion or long-term commitment. 2. Infatuated love is often what is felt as "love at first sight." But without the intimacy and the commitment components of love, infatuated love may disappear suddenly. 3. Empty love: Sometimes, a stronger love deteriorates into empty love, in which the commitment remains, but the intimacy and passion have died. In cultures in which arranged marriages are common, relationships often begin as empty love.
- 33. 4. Romantic love: Romantic lovers are bonded emotionally (as in liking) and physically through passionate arousal. 5. Companionate love is often found in marriages in which the passion has gone out of the relationship, but a deep affection and commitment remain. Companionate love is generally a personal relation you build with somebody you share your life with, but with no sexual or physical desire. It is stronger than friendship because of the extra element of commitment. The love ideally shared between family members is a form of companionate love, as is the love between deep friends or those who spend a lot of time together in any asexual but friendly relationship.
- 34. 6. Fatuous love can be exemplified by a whirlwind courtship and marriage in which a commitment is motivated largely by passion, without the stabilizing influence of intimacy. 7. Consummate love is the complete form of love, representing the ideal relationship toward which many people strive but which apparently few achieve. Sternberg cautions that maintaining a consummate love may be even harder than achieving it.
- 35. What Are the Five Love Languages?
- 36. • Chapman's book "The 5 Love Languages" was first published in 1992. Before writing the book, Chapman began to notice patterns in couples he was counseling. He realized that the couples were misunderstanding each other's needs. • That led him to come up with five love languages, or ways that people in relationships express love. They are: • Words of affirmation • Quality time • Physical touch • Acts of service • Receiving gifts
- 37. Words of Affirmation •"Words of affirmation" is about expressing affection through spoken words, praise, or appreciation. When this is someone's primary love language, they enjoy kind words and encouragement, uplifting quotes, love notes, and cute text messages. You can make this person's day by complimenting them or pointing out what they do well.
- 38. Quality Time Someone with this love language wants undivided attention. They feel loved if you are present and focused on them when you are together. This means putting down the cell phone, turning off the computer, making eye contact, and actively listening.
- 39. Physical Touch A person with physical touch as their primary love language feels love through physical affection. Aside from sex, they feel loved when their partner holds their hand, touches their arm, or gives them a massage at the end of the day, for example. This person's idea of a perfect date might include cuddling on the couch with a glass of wine and a good movie. They simply want to be close to their partner physically.
- 40. Acts of Service Acts of service are nice things you do for your partner that make them feel loved and appreciated, such as: • Helping with the dishes • Running errands • Vacuuming • Putting gas in the car If your partner's main love language is acts of service, they'll notice and appreciate little things you do for them. They tend to perform acts of service and kindness for others, too.
- 41. Receiving Gifts • For someone who uses and responds to this love language, gift-giving indicates love and affection. They treasure not only the gift itself but also the time and effort the gift-giver put into it. • People who enjoy receiving gifts as part of their primary love language do not necessarily expect large or expensive presents; it's more the effort and thoughtfulness behind the gift that count. • When you take the time to pick out a gift specifically for them, it tells them you really know them. People with this love language can often remember every little gift they have received from their loved ones because it makes such an impact on them.
- 72. Thank you!
Editor's Notes
- John Allen Lee
- The triangular theory of love explains the topic of love in an interpersonal relationship. Psychologist Robert Sternberg’s theory describes types of love based on three different scales: intimacy, passion, and commitment. It is important to recognize that a relationship based on a single element is less likely to survive than one based on two or more. Different stages and types of love can be explained as different combinations of these three elements. For example, the relative emphasis of each component changes over time as an adult romantic relationship develops.
- The triangular theory of love explains the topic of love in an interpersonal relationship. Psychologist Robert Sternberg’s theory describes types of love based on three different scales: intimacy, passion, and commitment. It is important to recognize that a relationship based on a single element is less likely to survive than one based on two or more. Different stages and types of love can be explained as different combinations of these three elements. For example, the relative emphasis of each component changes over time as an adult romantic relationship develops.
- Liking (also called friendship) The second type of love that Sternberg introduces is liking, which is when the intimacy component of love is present in a relationship, but the passion and decision/commitment components are not (Sternberg, 1986). According to Sternberg, liking involves feelings of "closeness, bondedness, and warmth toward the other, without feelings of intense passion or long-term commitment" (Sternberg, 1986, p. 123). Liking can be seen in the relationships in our lives that we refer to as friendships (Sternberg, 1986). As we all know, friendships can exist at different levels, and according to Sternberg, if any other components of love are present in a friendship, then it is not considered liking but is considered a different kind of love (Sternberg, 1986). Therefore, only friendships that lack the passion and decision/commitment components of love are considered to be the kind of love labeled as liking. Infatuation The third type of love that Sternberg introduces is infatuated love, which is when the passion component of love is present in a relationship, but the intimacy and decision/commitment components are not (Sternberg, 1986). Sternberg places "love at first sight" in this category of love, which according to him involves "a high degree of psychophysiological arousal, manifested in somatic symptoms such as increased heartbeat or even palpitations of the heart, increased hormonal secretions, erection of genitals (penis or clitoris), and so on" (Sternberg, 1986, p.124). This kind of love develops very quickly, without time for any intimate feelings to grow or for a commitment to be made (Sternberg, 1986). Empty Love The fourth type of love that Sternberg introduces is empty love, which is when the decision/commitment component of love is present in a relationship, but the intimacy and passion components are not (Sternberg, 1986). This type of love can commonly be found in some long-term relationships where the couple has lost feelings for one another. However, Sternberg points out an interesting phenomenon regarding this kind of love: that "in our society we are most accustomed to empty love as it occurs as a final or near-final stage of a long term relationship", but "in other societies, empty love may be the first stage of a long-term relationship" (such as in an arranged marriage) (Sternberg, 1986, p. 124).
- Romantic Love The fifth type of love that Sternberg introduces is romantic love, which is when the intimacy and passion components of love are present in a relationship, but the decision/commitment component is not (Sternberg, 1986). This kind of love can also be thought of as "liking with an added element, namely, the arousal brought about by physical attraction and its concomitants" (Sternberg, 1986, p. 124). For a popular literary example of this kind of love, one can look at "Romeo and Juliet", where the couple shares both intimate and passionate feelings towards one another, but have made no real commitment to one another (Sternberg, 1986, p. 124). Romantic love can also be found towards the beginning of some long-term relationships, before the involved parties have made the commitment to a long-term relationship with the other person. Companionate Love The sixth type of love that Sternberg introduces is companionate love, which is when the intimacy and decision/commitment components of love are present in a relationship, but the passion component is not (Sternberg, 1986). Sternberg describes this type of love as "a long-term, committed friendship, the kind that frequently occurs in marriages in which the physical attraction (a major source of passion) has died down" (Sternberg, 1986, p. 124). Because marriages typically involve such large amounts of the intimacy and decision/commitment components of love, they can often become forms of companionate love when the "spark" or the passion in the relationship is lost, commonly over time (Sternberg, 1986).
- Fatuous Love The seventh type of love that Sternberg introduces is fatuous love, which is when the passion and decision/commitment components of love are present in a relationship, but the intimacy component is not (Sternberg, 1986). According to Sternberg, fatuous love "is the kind of love we sometimes associate with Hollywood, or with whirlwind courtships, in which a couple meets on Day X, gets engaged two weeks later, and marries the next month", where "a commitment is made on the basis of passion without the stabilizing element of intimate involvement" (Sternberg, 1986, p. 124). Because the intimate component of love takes time to develop, these relationships lack that aspect of love and their relationship may therefore be more likely to fail (Sternberg, 1986). Consummate Love Finally, the eighth type of love that Sternberg introduces is consummate love, which is when all three components of love are present in a relationship (Sternberg, 1986). Nowadays, when one thinks of love, they are most likely thinking about consummate love. Additionally, consummate love is seemingly the type of love that most people aim to find (Sternberg, 1986). Outside of romantic interests, an example of consummate love can be found in many parents' love for their children, often dubbed "unconditional love" (Sternberg, 1986).