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    The Unfinished Race: Redefining the Recovery Process
    The Unfinished Race: Redefining the Recovery Process
    The Unfinished Race: Redefining the Recovery Process
    Ebook165 pages2 hours

    The Unfinished Race: Redefining the Recovery Process

    By Kylene Cochrane

    ()

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    About this ebook

    The Unfinished Race - Redefining the Recovery Process details Kylene Cochrane's struggles with physical injury as a competitive athlete, and the "mental injury" she suffered as a result. 


    Her pos

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherNew Degree Press
    Release dateApr 30, 2021
    ISBN9781636763453
    The Unfinished Race: Redefining the Recovery Process

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      Book preview

      The Unfinished Race - Kylene Cochrane

      1.png

      The Unfinished Race

      The Unfinished Race:

      Redefining the Recovery Process

      Kylene Cochrane

      New Degree Press

      Copyright © 2021 Kylene Cochrane

      All rights reserved.

      The Unfinished Race:

      Redefining the Recovery Process

      ISBN

      978-1-63676-870-0 Paperback

      978-1-63730-172-2 Kindle Ebook

      978-1-63676-345-3 Ebook

      Table of Contents

      Introduction

      The Beginning

      I Was an Actress

      The History of Female Running

      The Beginning

      Gambling with Guilt

      Applying the Grit

      Healing Words

      A Holistic Identity

      Obsessive Passion and Identity

      A New Mindset

      The Importance of Fueling One’s Energy

      Young Misconceptions

      Listen with Grace

      Mental Imagination

      Selfishly, Selfless

      The Beauty in the Between.

      My Present Identity

      The Last Run

      Life in the Between

      Acknowledgements

      I Was an Actress. In The Beginning, I Gambled with Guilt, and was Provided Healing Words. I held an Obsessive Identity until I discovered a New Mindset, And became Energized. Reflecting on my Younger Misconceptions,

      I Listened with Grace. I utilized Mental Imagination. Becoming Selfishly Selfless I found my Present Identity. I re-lived My Last Run And unveiled the Life in the Between.

      To my family and friends who believed in this book even before it was written, I thank you.

      Introduction:

      Are you aware that you’ve been running in men’s sneakers...and they are also a size too big? From the beginning, my origins in running stemmed from innocence. My first taste for running began in middle school after not making the soccer team. I called my friend that afternoon to see if the cross-country team was still taking athletes. A few days later I found myself on the bus heading to a meet, and after the race I called my parents to tell them I had won. You what? My parents were as surprised as I was.

      Those were my golden days of running: when running was novel and innocent like the wrong-sized sneakers I wore for two years. During my freshman year of high school, I was officially initiated into the world of track. In my first race, I saw the innocence of the sport in full display as I waved to my dad each lap, and also yelled enthusiastically, Okay, coach, after he yelled my splits to me for each lap.

      Today, that innocence is lost. At eighteen, I was the 1600-meters New Jersey State Champion. I then spent four years competing as a Division I collegiate track athlete at the University of Pennsylvania. During that time, I realized how much I missed those wrong-sized sneakers and the time in my life when I wasn’t so swarmed by the running world.

      I started writing this book in November of 2014, after enduring my first running injury in college. Sitting in my single dormitory room on Penn’s campus, I let tears of despair mottle the first page I had barely filled. I heard the shouts and laughter of other students outside my window. I felt the pen beneath my hands while fully surrendering to the pain radiating from my leg, a relentless reminder that I was injured. I wasn’t sure if this book would ever be a reality.

      Sitting in the corner of my dimly lit dorm room, I felt something was wrong with me. Why am I feeling this way? I had lost a core aspect of my identity, and I did not know how to adapt. I felt alone and isolated, and my mind was suffering more than my injured leg. Intuitively I knew that my solitary, damaged image needed to be acknowledged, and I also knew I was not the only individual to have felt this way. The running world is far from perfect, and conversations surrounding the health of the complete athlete need to begin. There is a lack of focus on the mental psyche of injuries, and yet a heightened, unspoken focus on body image. These topics are silent, but they are there living and harming today’s runners, and if not addressed, tomorrow’s as well.

      The year is 2021, and I decided I had to finish the story I began so long ago. Prior to picking up the pen, however, I was inspired by Mary Cain, a former professional runner. At seventeen years old, Mary Cain was among the fastest female runners in America and signed with a top professional running team.¹ To gain a spot on a professional sports team is the epitome of love and passion intertwined into a job. According to the 2018-2019 NCAA Recruiting Facts, fewer than 2 percent of collegiate athletes go on to the professional level.² And yet, this is every athlete’s dream.

      The fact that a professional runner walked away from what others dream of depicts something about the running culture. Mary Cain left the highest level, professionalism, which was the maximum, the apex, the golden wish. Cain dared to do something that few people have the courage to do.

      Her story is inspiring, but I wondered if it was unique or part of a larger trend. I wondered if faults in the running world were outside of the professional world and on the tracks of high schools and colleges. I set out to talk to runners and decided to make my return back into the world of competitive running.

      I wanted to understand if other athletes felt the mental burden of injuries the way that I did.I wanted to know if they struggled with body image.I wanted to know how educated they were on the female body. I wanted to know the life of runners within the running world.

      Today, the current view of the running world lacks a holistic viewpoint. There is a strong focus on the run and very little on the environment and life surrounding the athlete. Attending a track meet, you hear shouts of encouragement, mile split times, and cadences to strive for. What about the identity one holds apart from the accumulation of miles?

      Society is led to believe the best runner is the fastest runner—the one who wins the meets, and the one who wears the golden medal. Athletes believe they are invincible; they will never get hurt. But athletes also continue to undermine the fact that their current choices will impact their health years later. It is not so much athletes pushing past their capabilities; it is athletes pushing past what is considered a healthy passion without even knowing it.

      As a runner in both high school and at the D1 collegiate level, I was surrounded by the high intensity of the track culture, the long miles, and the timed runs. I was aware of the times and athletes around me, but I was at a complete loss and understanding as to what was occurring in my own body. I was internally breaking. I was running fast—but unconsciously was not energizing my body enough. I did not understand energy or viability. I was not nurturing my body. I was not loving it. I was not listening to it. My body broke five different times in college, and while my body continued to break, my mentality could only think of the end race.

      People have asked me why I kept trying. Why? Behind the scenes, I could not give up. I told myself I would work hard those four years at Penn, learn as much as I could about myself, my body, and the extent of human grit, and then take a hiatus from running. I am now attending graduate school, working toward my doctorate of physical therapy. I am telling this story because I want to educate athletes now.

      I believe the best runner is not the fastest runner.I believe more mileage does not mean more success.The running world has become a race to finish without preparing to start.

      I want to first state a caveat; in no way are my recommendations, thoughts, or feelings in this book absolute. I am not recommending any particular medical advice. I am simply teaching the power of mindful and physical nurturing. I am simply empowering injury as a time to heal.

      This book is broken into two parts, the first part addressing the mental components of injury, and the second considering how valuable a holistic identity is, rather than just an athletic one. This book particularly targets female athletes, especially runners, but can be read by any individual enduring their own injury. This book is not my story alone and encompasses interviews from other previously injured athletes. These athletes are not professionals, but rather everyday, passionate individuals. This story is an open memoir, a letter on what is not talked about enough, and the need to identify the actor/actress inside us all performing as if we are okay when in reality we are not.

      1 The New York Times, I Was the Fastest Girl in America, Until I Joined Nike | NYT Opinion, November 7, 2019, Youtube Video, 6:59.

      2 NCAA Recruiting Facts: College Sports Create a Pathway to Opportunity for Student-Athletes, National Collegiate Athletic Association, revised August 2020.

      Part One

      The Beginning

      Chapter One:

      I Was an Actress

      I was an actress. Even prior to taking the class Intro to Acting, I discovered I consistently masked my emotions out of fear for vulnerability. It was the spring semester of my senior year at the University of Pennsylvania, and I had already committed to Drexel University’s physical therapy graduate program. I was done with the heavy science-packed classes and decided to branch away from my comfort zone by enrolling in this class.

      I signed up with hesitation because apart from class presentations, I never volunteered for absolute vulnerability. I personally felt comfortable sitting in the front of a classroom, taking diligent notes, while the professor displayed themself in front of me.

      Day one of the class challenged me in a way that was far different from my neuroscience classes. I was called upon to make uninterrupted eye contact with a complete stranger for minutes straight. I found this incredibly difficult, but our professor persistently taught the secret behind unveiling true acting: trust and connection.

      I think I am going to drop the class, I told my friends later that day at track practice. I was able to pass molecular neurobiology, but I was not able to make eye contact with someone for minutes straight. I questioned, what does this say about grades and education? The fact that I can perform well on a GPA standard, but yet I failed to allow someone to search deep into my eyes. What was I afraid might be uncovered?

      I went to the second class, and again, we were told to make eye contact. This time, however, there was a slight twist. Apart from

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