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    The Marriage Gift: 365 Prayers for Our Marriage - A Daily Devotional Journey to Inspire, Encourage, and Transform Us and Our Prayer Life
    The Marriage Gift: 365 Prayers for Our Marriage - A Daily Devotional Journey to Inspire, Encourage, and Transform Us and Our Prayer Life
    The Marriage Gift: 365 Prayers for Our Marriage - A Daily Devotional Journey to Inspire, Encourage, and Transform Us and Our Prayer Life
    Ebook409 pages4 hours

    The Marriage Gift: 365 Prayers for Our Marriage - A Daily Devotional Journey to Inspire, Encourage, and Transform Us and Our Prayer Life

    By T.C. Boyle and Jennifer Smith

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    About this ebook

    The Marriage Gift will inspire and equip you to pray boldly and specifically every day of the year to grow in confidence and intimacy with both your spouse and the Lord.

    Prayer is one of the greatest assets to your marriage. Whether you already feel comfortable praying together or need help kickstarting your prayer life, The Marriage Gift is your go-to guide for bold, powerful prayers for your marriage.

    Filled with practical, real-world topics such as health and healing, finances, trust, technology issues, anxiety, temptation, self-control, life transitions, supporting each other's goals, and more, this book will open your eyes and your heart to new ways of loving your partner. As you pray together, you will:

    • Learn to trust God more as you see him move in mighty ways in every area of your life and marriage
    • Experience growth and change in the areas of your marriage that need work
    • Create a lifelong habit of deep, meaningful, and specific prayer for your marriage
    • Learn how God intends marriage to be a ministry that blesses your community and the world at large, in addition to growing you individually

     

    Aaron and Jennifer Smith have shown how the power of prayer can transform a marriage as they've shared personal challenges and victories for more than ten years. The Marriage Gift is their invitation for you to experience transformation in your own marriage as you commit to praying bold, powerful prayers for one another this year.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherZondervan
    Release dateOct 17, 2023
    ISBN9780310367079
    Author

    T.C. Boyle

    T.C. Boyle is an American novelist and short-story writer. Since the mid-1970s, he has published eighteen novels and twelve collections of short stories. He won the PEN/Faulkner Award in 1988 for his third novel, World’s End, and the Prix Médicis étranger (France) in 1995 for The Tortilla Curtain. His novel Drop City was a finalist for the 2003 National Book Award. Most recently, he has been the recipient of the Mark Twain American Voice in Literature Award, the Henry David Thoreau Prize, and the Jonathan Swift Prize for satire. He is a Distinguished Professor of English Emeritus at the University of Southern California and lives in Santa Barbara.

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      The Marriage Gift - T.C. Boyle

      INTRODUCTION

      Prayer Matters More Than You Know

      Prayer is not just a word to describe what religious people do in faithful duty. It also is not a frivolous word synonymous with wishful thinking. Prayer is much more than a word; it is a breath, a heartbeat, a sanctuary where one enters boldly before the throne of God to meet our Creator, our Father in heaven, our Savior. Prayer is a way of connecting and communing with the Lord, making our relationship with Him amazingly personal. Prayer is humbly acknowledging His lordship over all. Through the gift of prayer, we have the privilege of expressing our burdens, our praises, and our requests for God to move in our lives.

      If we could permanently etch one thing into your heart from this book, it would be that prayer matters more than you know. The perfect and holy Creator allows His beloved creations, made in His image, to communicate directly with Him. The fact that He listens to us—and more than that, welcomes us into His presence—is utterly miraculous. What an extraordinary gift!

      The purpose of prayer is not to bend God to our will, but rather to align our heart to His. God’s will is revealed through His Word. As we abide in Scripture and as we pray, we are seeking God’s will to be done. When we do this, we can be confident that He hears us!

      This is the confidence that we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will he hears us. (1 John 5:14)

      Even when we do not feel confident and do not know how to pray, we can still draw close to God in our weakness, knowing that we are not alone, that we cannot live in our own strength, and that our Savior understands our weakness. We can still rely on Him daily. The beautiful truth is that the Holy Spirit intercedes for us. Though we may lack the words to pray, the Lord never does.

      The Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. (Romans 8:26)

      In marriage, when pain and weakness overwhelm us, when the tension of love and frustration stirs within us, when it seems like there is no clear path forward, prayer is the bridge of peace that brings connection between the one offering up a prayer and the Lord, as well as between spouses. Prayer is always the next right step. Prayer is essential for everyone because we are all made of flesh, which is weak, susceptible to temptation, and inclined to sin. Scripture warns us to watch and pray, guarding ourselves from temptation and the deceitfulness of sin.

      Watch and pray that you may not enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak. (Matthew 26:41)

      In prayer, we have the opportunity to reveal our hearts to our heavenly Father. We get to offer Him our thoughts and feelings about what we are experiencing. We must trust the Lord in order to bring Him our worries and cares, our needs and our fears. We must lay aside our pride to appeal to the Lord and speak to the author of life. In doing so, we receive from Him the gift of relationship, answered prayers, met needs, life-changing transformation, and transcending peace.

      So may we experience the breath and heartbeat of prayer as we bolster the courage to enter into the throne room of grace in faith, believing that He will move in our lives and marriages. May we have the assurance and fortitude to pray without ceasing.

      Praying at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication. (Ephesians 6:18)

      The Power of Prayer

      We hope that by sharing our journey of experiencing the power of prayer in our marriage, you will be inspired to build your own daily habit of prayer.

      The impact of prayer in our lives and in our marriage has been extraordinary. Although we grew up learning how to pray and were committed to praying often, we did not know how vital prayer is to marriage until we were desperate for it. In the first few years of our marriage, we experienced the pain of hardship. Finances often brought us to our knees in prayer. The burden of school loan debt, the stress of searching for good-paying jobs during the recession, and the consistent daily demand of our responsibilities brought concerns we had to handle as a married couple. We also realized we needed to grow in the way we communicated with one another, especially during conflict. When we felt frustrated and hurt, we would surrender our hearts and our emotions to God in prayer, pleading with Him to help us understand each other. Countless times we have felt divided in how we feel, think, and perceive circumstances, and the only thing that helps us feel connected again is praying together.

      In addition to struggles with finances, communication, and challenging circumstances, we experienced a specific issue in marriage that lasted four years. Jennifer experienced physical pain every time we tried to have sex. This situation stirred up many doubts and insecurities within us. We relied on prayer more than we ever had before. When despair and hopelessness overwhelmed us to the point of heartache, and the temptation to separate from one another berated us daily, we cried out to the Lord in prayer. We begged and petitioned Him for an answer to our circumstances, for relief, and for hope that our marriage would survive. There were times we prayed alone, times we prayed together, and even times that only one of us had the courage to stand in the gap to pray for our marriage.

      The Lord heard us and He answered. He helped us find a path to reconciliation and healing. Not only did He reveal a solution that helped Jennifer’s body, but He also used our struggle to refine our character and help us get to know Him better. Through every circumstance we’ve faced as a couple, we have endured together with hope in our hearts because we choose over and over again to submit ourselves before the Lord in prayer. In humility, we have laid down our strong opinions, our hurts, and our burdens, asking the Lord to lead us through each situation.

      We have witnessed the power of prayer draw us closer to God and closer to each other. When we approach the Lord in prayer together, we feel united, encouraged, and reassured. Our hope and desire is that you too would experience and witness the wonderful working power of the Lord in your marriage as you purpose to pray for your marriage.

      Will you consider believing and hoping for good things to happen in your marriage?

      Will you step into the throne room of grace and trust the Lord to lead you and your spouse through any and all circumstances?

      Will you take time to petition the Lord for healing and restoration and for His will to be done in your marriage?

      We encourage you to try.

      What This Book Is

      This book is full of prayers written for the sole purpose of encouraging your faith and supporting your marriage. This book has been written to inspire you to devote yourself to daily prayer for your life and marriage. The topics of each prayer have been curated and produced from the experience of praying for our own marriage. The varying topics are intended to remind you of the many different areas of your marriage relationship that need constant, fervent, and humble prayer. Praying for these areas of your marriage, praying for your heart and for your spouse’s heart, will hopefully show you how transformative it can be to bring both of your needs to God. This book provides you with words to share with the Lord, a helpful tool when you are building confidence in praying. May these pages be a bridge to draw you closer to God and closer to your spouse.

      What This Book Isn’t

      This book is not meant to be a replacement for your everyday prayer life. Nor is it meant to be a comprehensive list of topics that cover every part of your life and marriage. These prayers can’t fully address the intimate details of your story, so we urge you to add those details as you pray. This book is also not meant to be divisive and shouldn’t be used as a weapon against your spouse to show them the areas in which they are failing or have neglected. Please don’t misuse these prayers with the motivation to control or manipulate one another in marriage.

      These prayers are not magical, and praying them does not guarantee you will receive all that you want in life and marriage. Ultimately, having a humble heart before the Lord is more important than having a prayer answered the way you desire it to be. This resource does not require you to read the prayers together with your spouse. You can agree to read together, or you can do it on your own. Lastly, this book is not intended to collect dust on the shelf, so use it regularly to prevent buildup.

      How to Use This Book

      Our goal with offering 365 written prayers is to embolden you to create a habit of praying every day of the year, not just when you have a need or the pressures of life seem unbearable. We also hope that each unique prayer topic would encourage you to consider the varying areas of your marriage to bring before the Lord. As you commit to establishing a daily prayer habit, we believe these prayers will encourage growth in your personal relationship with the Lord and with your spouse.

      As you work through these prayers, we encourage you to add personal details as you go. Make these prayers your own! Also, if you find that a prayer topic doesn’t quite fit your marriage, we encourage you to use it to pray for another married couple in your life who might be struggling in that area.

      Don’t get overwhelmed if you miss a day of prayer. Keep a steady pace by picking up where you left off.

      The best way to utilize this book is to choose a time of the day that you and your spouse can read it together. But if your spouse can’t read it with you, then choose a time that you can commit to reading it yourself. If your spouse also commits to reading the prayers on their own time, consider making room each week or once a month to talk about the impact you are experiencing.

      We intentionally did not add dates to each prayer because we want you to be able to start from any point in the book on any day of the year. This also makes it easy to skip around to individual prayers and topics that may cover a pressing issue you’d like to address in prayer.

      One more practical idea we suggest is keeping a journal nearby to record any encouragement or insight the Lord provides as you pray. You can also use this journal to keep a record of answered prayers that you can celebrate and praise Him for.

      Continue steadfastly in prayer, being watchful in it with thanksgiving. (Colossians 4:2)

      The Marriage Gift

      Years ago, the Lord planted a seed deep in our hearts for this specific book. We longed for it to one day break free from our hearts and be held in the hands of married couples who deeply desire to draw close to the Lord in prayer together. We knew this book needed time to grow its roots deep in our hearts if we wanted it to have a long-lasting presence and impact in the lives of believers. The conviction of praying over our own marriage led us through the development of each prayer we chose to include in this book. Over the years, the Lord faithfully watered this idea He planted in us, and in His timing He’s brought it forth for His glory. We are grateful for the opportunity to share these prayers, and we hope they minister to you the divine message that God loves you and has a purpose for your marriage.

      We felt inspired to title this collection of prayers The Marriage Gift as it holds a multilayered meaning. The first thing we want to point out is that prayer is a gift to marriage. Through lifting up praises, concerns, and requests to the Lord, spouses draw close to God and to each other. Prayer is a gift that blesses marriage. As we have prayed together over the years, we have been continually reaffirmed in our love for each other. This is the ministry of prayer! We discovered that prayer has a uniquely powerful way of bringing unity to marriage. Experiencing the ministry of prayer in our marriage convinced us to make prayer a significant part of our ministry to others.

      You have the opportunity to experience the gift of prayer in your marriage. In times of hardship and in times of overflowing joy, in times of confusion and in times of clarity, in times of challenge and in times of rest, having a heart committed to prayer will support your marriage, encourage your faith, and be a catalyst for growth in your life. You can experience the extraordinary power of the Lord as He works in you and through you when you pray. And when you commit to pray for and with your spouse, you are ministering to them, reminding them of the importance to remain humble before the Lord. In doing this, you become a gift to your spouse!

      When you and your spouse are unified and walk with the Lord, when you pray, obey His Word, and let Him lead you, your marriage is a gift to God! He finds pleasure in your marriage and can use your marriage to carry out His will as He pleases. For example, when you and your spouse are moved by God to pray for another couple, you experience the ministry of prayer. And in such a selfless and loving response of submitting to the Lord in prayer, you and your marriage become a gift to others!

      Lastly, this book itself is the marriage gift, a resource that we hope becomes an extraordinary blessing to you that contributes to spiritual growth and marital intimacy.

      Prayer is humbling.

      Prayer is sanctifying.

      Prayer reminds us we are not alone.

      Prayer alleviates pressure and provides great peace.

      Prayer is an extraordinary part of our journey with God that matures as we practice it faithfully. May this book inspire a lifelong pursuit of prayer and help you build such a strong prayer life that prayer becomes your first response to any circumstance.

      A Prayer for Your Marriage

      From the Authors

      Dear heavenly Father, Thank You for the couple reading this book and praying these prayers. We ask You to bless their marriage and strengthen their relationship as they recognize the truth that their marriage is a gift from You. In submitting their hearts to You in prayer, may they also recognize the truth that they are offering their marriage as a gift to You, in hopes that it would bless You and be used as You see fit. Holy Spirit, please be their navigator as You guide them to a place of greater spiritual maturity and deeper intimacy with You and with each other. Cover their marriage and protect them from the threats of the Enemy. Protect them from the dangers of their own flesh hindering them from continual growth. Holy Spirit, please convict their hearts of any sin they are struggling with, help them repent, and lead them to be reconciled with You and with each other. May these prayers inspire them to draw closer to You and each other in a way they have never known before. As they submit their hearts to You in prayer, please let them experience Your wonderful working power. Sanctify them and build them up in love. We pray that their marriage is a beacon of light and hope in this dark world as they choose to reflect Your love. May they bring You glory as they chase boldly after You together in Jesus’s name. Amen.

      365 PRAYERS FOR OUR MARRIAGE

      1

      LOVING EACH OTHER LIKE CHRIST

      Dear Lord, Thank You for the gift of marriage and for leading us to a season of intentional prayer so that we may keep You at the center of it. Help us hold fast to the commitment of praying for our marriage, and draw our hearts closer to You and to each other every day. Heavenly Father, will You transform the areas of our relationship that need maturing? We want to grow in our desire to be like Christ and to love each other like He loves. We want to love one another unconditionally. Please help us love with a sacrificial, compassionate love, Lord. May we be peacemakers in our marriage, kind to one another, and quick to forgive as You are quick to forgive us. May Your love abound in us as we abide in You, and may Your will be done in us and through our marriage. In Jesus’s name we pray. Amen.

      A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. (JOHN 13:34)

      2

      RESISTING THE ENEMY

      Dear Lord, Thank You for being our defender, our refuge, and our strength. Thank You for equipping us by Your Word to do what is right. God, we give You this day, and we surrender our plans so that Your will is done. Help us to resist the Enemy, to shut out his lies, and to believe only what is true. May we resist temptation and choose to walk confidently in righteousness. In moments of weakness, when the Enemy tries to whisper his lies or throw flaming arrows our way, please protect us. Tune our hearts and minds to hear Your truth above any lies. Holy Spirit, remind us of all that Your Word says. We pray the Enemy would not prevail in our marriage. Please help us to share our weaknesses with each other and encourage one another through challenging times. Lord, strengthen our souls, and help us to flee from the Enemy every day. May Your name be magnified as we submit to You. In Jesus’s name we pray. Amen.

      Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. (JAMES 4:7)

      3

      IN GOD’S HANDS

      Dear Lord, We invite You to be present in our relationship, to teach us how to thrive in our marriage, and to show us how to glorify You with our marriage. Our relationship is in Your hands. May we experience unity and know the joy of a peaceful relationship. Please watch over us and guard our hearts as we follow You. Help us find our security in You and to trust You more. We humble ourselves at the foot of Your throne and submit to You in all Your ways. Please be our comfort in times of distress, our security in times of confusion, and our refuge when circumstances are challenging. God, when our relationship feels unstable and our hearts are insecure, thank You for holding us up with Your mighty hand. Help us to have hearts full of gratitude so we never forget all You have done for us. In Jesus’s name we pray. Amen.

      Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you. (1 PETER 5:6)

      4

      PRESERVE OUR LOVE

      Dear Lord, Thank You for Your gift of love. Thank You for showing us in Your Word how to love. Please help us choose to love each other every day, just as You love us. Will You give us fresh eyes to see when we are not loving one another well? Lord, transform us to be responsive to Your Holy Spirit so that You can guide us to be quick to apologize when we do wrong and forgive when we need to forgive. Show us ways to fulfill each other’s needs. Season our love with creativity. Fortify and preserve our love so it will stand the test of time. Holy Spirit, please guard our marriage from the attacks of the Enemy and the temptations of our flesh. May we bear the weight of one another’s burdens, believe in each other’s abilities, hope in a beautiful future together, and endure side by side, all in love. We pray that our love for each other never ends. In Jesus’s name we pray. Amen.

      Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. (1 CORINTHIANS 13:7–8)

      5

      MARRIAGE IS A TESTIMONY

      Dear Lord, Thank You for the way Your love has covered our sins. Your love is transforming, and Your kindness is beyond measure. We lift up our hearts to You and ask You to show us how to love each other earnestly. We pray we would have a sincere and intense conviction about how we are supposed to treat one another in marriage. May Your Holy Spirit help us to be self-controlled, not quick to get angry with one another. Please infuse our hearts with grace to pour out over one another when we sin against each other. We pray we would repent and forgive each other as we pursue reconciliation. Please help us never to shame each other for our sins. Heavenly Father, will You show us how to gently restore each other after sin is exposed? We pray our love would cover sin just like Your love covers us. Lord, we know the marriage relationship is a picture of Christ’s love for His bride, the church. We pray that those who see into our marriage see Your love reflected in the way we love each other. Our hearts’ desire is that our marriage would be a testimony of Your loving-kindness and that others would witness Your wonderful working power in our lives. In Jesus’s name we pray. Amen.

      Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins. (1 PETER 4:8)

      6

      REFINE US

      Dear Lord, We exalt You! Thank You for giving us life. We know You have made us new creations in Christ. Lord, cleanse us and sanctify us in truth. Purify our hearts and minds so that we may be holy as You are holy. We rejoice knowing that You allow us to experience various trials that test our faith. Lord, fill us with understanding during these times, and help us respond to these tests and trials in a way that honors You. Our desire is that we would encourage and support one another through every hardship that comes our way. We pray You would use us to sharpen each other, to inspire each other, and to affirm each other. God, will You please refine our thinking, refine our communication, refine our belief, and refine every part of our lives? May we remain steadfast in faithfulness and abide in Your Word and walk in faith so we can continually bring You glory. In Jesus’s name we pray. Amen.

      In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ. (1 PETER 1:6–7)

      7

      OUR PURPOSE

      Dear Lord, We know You created marriage as a testimony of Your power and grace, and that our marriage is a vessel for Your good will. Our greatest desire is to be unified in marriage to faithfully live out our days to please You. We pray You would give us a clear understanding of our purpose together. As we pursue our purpose, we ask You to strengthen our hearts and give us confidence to accomplish all that You have for us. No matter what circumstances we face together, we pray that we would trust You to work all things together for good. Thank You for the time we get to spend together: the conversations we have, the memories we make, and even the simplest moments of connection we share. Will You remind us to take advantage of the opportunities we have today to love each other in big and small ways? Please remind us that a significant part of our purpose in marriage is to encourage one another with the truth that You love us deeply. As we chase boldly after You together, may our love reflect Your love to a broken world. In Jesus’s name we pray. Amen.

      We know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. (ROMANS 8:28)

      8

      SUPPORTING EACH OTHER

      Dear Lord, Thank You for the gift of companionship. We are grateful to share life together, to support each other, to persevere together, and to grow alongside one another. Help us to be strong pillars of steadfastness and fountains of encouragement for one another. May our words be sincere and uplifting. May our hearts be tuned in to each other, capable of knowing what the other needs before a word ever expresses it. Holy Spirit, inspire us to know how to respond quickly to one another’s needs and may we have the capacity to assist each other when possible. Will You stir up motivation in our hearts to love each other by praying for each other even when we don’t know exactly what to pray? Please bless our marriage as we walk in obedience to Your Word. Please give us eyes to see where You are already working and the wisdom we need to join You in that work. May we cheer one another on as we keep in step with You. In Jesus’s name we pray. Amen.

      Let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works. (HEBREWS 10:24)

      9

      FINDING HEALING

      Dear Lord, We crave healing and restoration in our marriage. Will You open our eyes to the struggles

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