The Confidence Booster.

25 tips toward boosting your confidence and self esteem. By Anna-Marie Stewart
This free e-book may be circulated as is for free, so long as no changes are made to it. Please feel free to pass this book around to anybody whom you think may like it or find it useful. If the information within this book is helpful to you, please consider sending a donation. Donate Via Paypal

Legal Notice and Terms of Agreement

Copyright 2004 Anna-Marie Stewart. All rights reserved. This e-book should be circulated as is, without changing any content. No part of this publication may be reproduced, without prior written permission from Anna-Marie Stewart. admin@annamarketing.com While attempts have been made to verify information contained in this publication, in view of human errors or changes in technology in the future, neither the author nor the publisher assumes any responsibility for errors, omissions, interpretations or usage of the subject matter herein. This publication contains the opinions and ideas of its author and is intended for informational purposes only. The author and publisher shall in no event be held liable for any loss or other damages incurred from the usage of this publication.

Limits of Liability / Disclaimer of Warranty:

The authors and publisher of this book and the accompanying materials have used their best efforts in preparing this program. The authors and publisher make no representation or warranties with respect to the accuracy, applicability, fitness, or completeness of the contents of this program. They disclaim any warranties (expressed or implied), merchantability, or fitness for any particular purpose. The authors and publisher shall in no event be held liable for any loss or other damages, including but not limited to special, incidental, consequential, or other damages. As always, the advice of a competent legal, tax, accounting or other professional should be sought. The authors and publisher do not warrant the performance, effectiveness or applicability of any sites listed in this book. All links are for information purposes only and are not warranted for content, accuracy or any other implied or explicit purpose. This manual contains material protected under International and Federal Copyright Laws and Treaties. Any unauthorized use of this material is prohibited. Adobe, Adobe Acrobat and related names are the property of Adobe Systems Incorporated. No relationship with or endorsement of this publication by Adobe Systems Incorporated should be inferred. Published by Anna-Marie Stewart Editor of Not Just Another Ezine http://annamarketing.com Author of Forget The Hype! http://annamarketing.com/pops/splash.html

Foreword
As human beings, we are a strange species. We have so many feelings and emotions running around inside us, and some that we just cant seem to get enough of at times. Confidence and self esteem are probably the most needed attributes in our world, but sometimes they can be the most difficult ones to build up. Wouldnt it just be so much easier if we were all lions or monkeys or some other animal? One big fight, one would be the winner and whichever one of us that was would just be totally brimming with confidence. Easy peasy! Unfortunately it doesnt work that way. We, as humans, have to work at these things diligently and keep ourselves primed so as not to wane away into nothingness. Our confidence can be totally knocked out of us for reasons we have no real control over at the time. Or some of us never learnt the art of being confident. I suppose this is where I need to introduce myself. After all, you dont know me yet and you probably want to know what prompted me to create this book.

My Story
So where do I begin? As a child I was bullied a lot at school, mostly because I was short, and I was a bit of a bookworm. I never learned to stand up for myself until we left England to move to Norway when I was 13. I decided there and then, as young as I was, that things needed to change. I wasnt going to be bullied any more and I was going to start enjoying life. Norway was a beautiful country, and people were very friendly. They had an amazingly child orientated way of life, and bullying was almost unheard of. My new life started out wonderfully. Even though it was a bit scary at first, all the positivity around me rubbed off on me and I grew up to be a very strong, confident and positive-minded young woman. Even after becoming a single parent to 3 lovely children, I was still extremely positive. It was like: So what if the relationship didnt work out, I still had me, my children and my family. My health was great and I had very few worries. Somehow, that all changed when I decided to move back to the UK so the children could be closer to their grandparents. Wed only been here for a short while when I met, and fell in love with someone. That in itself was strange enough, as I certainly wasnt looking for anybody, and Id been more than happy bringing up the children on my own. Anyway, to make a long story short, the relationship had a lot of ups and downs, and I felt my confidence ebbing away, slowly but surely. By the time the relationship started getting violent, my self-esteem had gone. I was worthless.

I couldnt leave the house for fear of what people would think of me, even though I knew deep down inside that it wasnt me. Things went from bad to worse, and I ended up with a few broken bones and torn ligaments etc. I felt so low I was sure I could walk upright under a snakes belly. Then one day I suddenly realized I didnt HAVE to live like this. I was choosing to stay because I was afraid to leave, afraid of what people might think or say. That thought hit me like a ton of bricks! This so wasnt me, the happy, outgoing, confident person from 5 years before. I had to do something about it! I packed up my children and our essentials and ran away from there as fast as I could! Boy, was I scared. A whole new town, all new faces, a place I didnt know and people Id never seen. I started thinking back. Back to when I moved to Norway. About how Id become the confident me that had lived then, and what had happened to me since. I decided the only way for me to survive was to actually BECOME that person again, so the long journey began. It wasnt easy, but I knew what had to be done. I knew the things I had to work on were my confidence and self esteem, and I did it. Im now happy and confident again. I publish a weekly internet marketing newsletter with a readership of 600+ and continuously growing. I have written a 79 page e-book on internet marketing. I get asked a lot of questions and always take the time to find the answers. I love being ME again!

So what about you? Are you confident? I dont know, maybe you wouldnt be reading this if you were? Or maybe youre just looking for ways to add that little bit of extra confidence to your life? Maybe youre looking for ideas so you can help a close friend, or a family member? Well, whatever your reasons, I hope you enjoy the book and that it gives you some ideas to work with. You dont HAVE to use all of these tips to become more confident. Choose the ones that are easiest to you, the ones that you feel suit your needs best. Then if and when you feel up to it, come back and try some more of them out. If you have any feedback or comments on this book I would love to hear from you. Id also love to hear from you if you decide to try out any of the techniques outlined. Drop me a line and let me know how it goes admin@annamarketing.com

25 tips toward boosting your confidence and self esteem.

1. Love Yourself: This can take a bit of practice and looks really funny, but try it, it works. When you wake up, give yourself a great big hug. Do the same when its time for sleep. Youve heard this said a million times before: How can you expect others to love you if you don't love yourself? Its true. Practice the morning and evening hugs for 2 weeks, maybe 3 weeks if you're the stubborn type, and youll see how well it works. 2. Look in the mirror: Every time you pass a mirror, look into it and flash your biggest and best smile at yourself. It might feel strange at first, but eventually itll make you feel brilliant about yourself. Tell yourself Looking good! or Wow, I love me! or similar phrases often enough to actually start believing it. 3. Do things that make you feel good: This can be anything from listening to music, trekking in the Andes, doing some volunteer work or even just taking a shower. Anything that gives you a positive feeling about yourself works for this one. 4. Listen to YOU: Face it. Nobody knows you better than you know yourself, no matter how many people try to tell you differently. So if your body, mind or gut is telling you something, then take notice of it, and don't worry about what other people may possibly have to say about it. 5. Talk to YOU: In times of stress, take a time-out break. Wander into your own mind and have a conversation with yourself about anything at all. Tell yourself how lucky you are to be you, and praise yourself for every good and positive thing you can attribute to yourself. 6. Remove negatives: If anything feels like its dragging you down, get rid of it. If its clutter, tidy up, if its a friend full of negativity explain nicely that you dont really feel up to talking right now. If its your kids acting up, leave the room for a while and so on.

7. Surround with positives: Surround yourself with things that bring out good feelings in you. Examples could be things such as happy, upbeat friends, a nice new picture, a new car, an old comfy blanket, candles, pictures of your family, your girlfriend, boyfriend, spouse etc. 8. Rumours Die: Did you hear something about somebody who said something about somebody else? Drop it! Rumours are nasty, horrible things that will only bring you down. Best way to kill a rumour? Ignore it! 9. Total Honesty: Be totally honest with yourself at all times. If theres something you don't like, admit it. If theres something you dont want to do right now and it isnt necessary for health and safety reasons then just dont do it until you feel like it. Same goes for the positive aspects. If theres something you want to do, and its not hurting anybody, then go ahead and do it. If you start feeling great about yourself for no apparent reason admit it and enjoy the feeling. 10. Responsibility Take full responsibility for your own actions. Don't shove the blame for anything over onto someone or something else. We all make choices in our lives, and once we take responsibility for those choices we tend to choose better for ourselves. Once we start to choose better, we feel better and things start falling into place. On the other hand, don't take over someone elses responsibilities just because you feel you have to. 11. Pretend: If you feel unsafe, unsure or nervous then go inside yourself and pretend youre a hot-shot lawyer, actor, actress, singer or whatever you need to be. Make believe youre presenting yourself as that person would until you feel better. Trust me, you WILL feel better, and eventually have no need to be anything but yourself.

12. Keep Trying: If youre trying to do something but don't get it right first time round, then try again, and again, and again, constantly learning from your mistakes until you get it right. When you finally DO get it right, youll feel wonderful about it. 13. Credit where credit is due: If youve done something really good, and people compliment you on it, accept the compliments with thanks! Understand that theyre complimenting because they really ARE impressed with what youve done. Believe in you and give yourself a pat on the back. (Although physically it would probably be easier to just give yourself a round of applause), 14. Stand Tall: Standing up straight will ALWAYS make you feel better about yourself than slouching does. Stand with your feet slightly apart, suck in your tummy and behind, broaden your shoulders and straighten your neck. Its an amazingly quick confidence boost.

15. Say Hello: Make it a rule to say hi to at least one person you don't know EVERY day. Give them the smile you flash at yourself in the mirror, the biggest and best one you can find. Theyll smile back automatically, and theyll walk away with a little extra confidence boost thanks to you. People look their best when they smile, and they also feel better by smiling too! This ultimately means you get a confidence boost too, for making someone else feel good about themselves. 16. Never Say Never....Ever: If you think something cant be done, then you'll end up proving yourself right eventually. So never say never, just keep plugging along until it works for you. If other people are telling you it cant be done, you're going to feel such immense satisfaction at actually doing it that your confidence will soar. 17. Get Active: Don't sit around the house just doing nothing. Get up, go out, cycling, walking, exercising, anything that might invigorate your brain. A lively brain full of thoughts will help you gain confidence.

18. Happy Foods: Happy foods, such as chocolate, strawberries, lemons, ice-cream etc will increase the serotonin levels in your brain, leading to an increased feeling of happiness. Feeling happy is a natural confidence boost. So go on, enjoy your food! (in moderation, of course). 19. Face Your Fear: Is there something you are afraid of? Face it full on. Doing something scary and overcoming the fear is a fantastic way to boost your confidence. So go on, jump out of that plane (with a parachute of course), drive that car, speak in front of a large crowd, ask for a promotion, or whatever it is that scares you. You'll feel absolutely brilliant once its done. 20. Will Power: Create a goal that you really want to reach. Possibly something like weight loss before a certain time, giving up smoking or having a certain amount of money in the bank within so-so many months etc. Take baby steps, and use your will power until you succeed at reaching your goal. It will be really hard, as will power can be very elusive at times, but keep going and don't give up. Once you have reached that first goal by using your will power you will have the confidence to create new goals AND reach them. 21. Ask questions: Any time you find yourself worrying about something you havent done, or something you think you should have done, ask yourself positive questions. Instead of thinking Im terrible for missing my friends birthday think What can I do to make my friend feel special? Or, instead of Why cant I ever seem to do things on time? change it to What can I change to better manage my time Creating positive questions will release the negative energies which have a tendency to pull down your self confidence. 22. Learn: Accept that not everything works out the way we plan it. Decide to accept any mistakes and rejections as part of a learning curve that we all need to go through. Without mistakes, you cant learn from your own experiences. Remember, experience builds confidence, so always learn as much as you can.

23. List: Write a list of every single thing you're good at, anything from clipping the dogs toenails to putting up a shelf. Take the time to sit and actually think about what you ARE good at and add them all to the list. You'll be surprised at how many things you end up jotting down, no matter how minor or trivial they may seem at the time. Whenever you have a spare 5 minutes, or if you're feeling a little low, take the list out of your pocket and read it. This is a great little way to give yourself a nice confidence boost. 24: Help out: There are lots of ways to help others, and feeling useful and helpful are great ways of building your confidence. Just make sure you do things because you WANT to do them. You could call a good friend who may be down at the moment-even take them out for coffee, you will brighten both your days, or you could possibly help out at an old folks home or similar. Knowing that people appreciate your help will boost your confidence for sure. 25: Show the way: Think of the one thing you do best of all. Think long and hard about this one. Thought of something? Now, find a discussion group or similar related to that topic and spread your wisdom by answering questions, offering advice or help to anybody needing it. If you cant find a group, you could even start one yourself. People will look up to you and that will give you all the more reason to feel confident about yourself.

These 25 things have all helped me at one point or another, and Im sure you will find some of them can help you too!

In Ending
I would just like to say a special thank you to all my friends out there, Rich, Elizabeth, Dennis, Ricki, Jaqui, Gina and everybody else who helped me get to where I am today. You know who you are and I couldnt have done it without you. Thanks guys!