The Fear Inside
()
About this ebook
ralphmorrison_@hotmail.com
Ralph Morrison
Ralph Morrison lives in Kelowna, British Columbia, Canada. He fifty-one years old and has lived with the effects of bullying. The Fear Inside is his breakout healing book intended to be therapeutic for those who have been bullied. Ralph worked in construction for twenty-five years. A divorcee, he has three beautiful daughters and loves to paint and write poetry.
Read more from Ralph Morrison
Fast Circuit Boards: Energy Management Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsDigital Circuit Boards: Mach 1 GHz Rating: 1 out of 5 stars1/5
Related to The Fear Inside
Related ebooks
Running Wild and Running Free Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsI'm Still Your Mom Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsBiography of Beverly Queen: Life and Times at 3324 Tate St. Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Love and Mercy of God Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsI Found Grace in His Sight: Saved by His Grace Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsWhy Me Father? Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsA Dangerous Life: A Womans Journey Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsOut of the Shadows: A Memoir Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Fight of My Life: Memoirs Of A Child Abuse Victim Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsGod and the Outhouse Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Charted Path Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsVoices Within A Teenage Mind [2017 Edition] Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsScreaming in Silence Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsChosen from Birth Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Trail of Life: The Story of an Adoptee Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsMy Life Story: Tragedy and Spirituality Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsYour Only Loyalty Is to the Truth Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsStones of Remembrance Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Great Awakening Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsWhere Did All the Butterflies Go? Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsDimly Lit Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsEvery Life Is a Story That Deserves to Be Told: True Stories About Life’S Ups and Downs Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsTrue Life: The Story of the Life of Luerenzia Triggs Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsIn the Blink of My Eye Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsIt Wasn't My Shame: A Story of Survival and Healing Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsBlack Child to Black Woman: An African-American Woman Coming-of-Age Story Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsBlack Child to Black Woman Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsLove’s the Only House Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsAutobiography of My Life: + Divine Success Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsBaby Boy: A Mother’S Story Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings
Relationships For You
The Big Book of 30-Day Challenges: 60 Habit-Forming Programs to Live an Infinitely Better Life Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Running on Empty: Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5I'm Glad My Mom Died Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Good Boundaries and Goodbyes: Loving Others Without Losing the Best of Who You Are Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Dumbing Us Down - 25th Anniversary Edition: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5A Child Called It: One Child's Courage to Survive Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Maybe You Should Talk to Someone: A Therapist, HER Therapist, and Our Lives Revealed Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Girl, Wash Your Face: Stop Believing the Lies About Who You Are so You Can Become Who You Were Meant to Be Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Unoffendable: How Just One Change Can Make All of Life Better (updated with two new chapters) Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Princess Bride: S. Morgenstern's Classic Tale of True Love and High Adventure Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5All About Love: New Visions Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Uninvited: Living Loved When You Feel Less Than, Left Out, and Lonely Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Wound Makes the Medicine: Elemental Remediations for Transforming Heartache Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Codependence and the Power of Detachment: How to Set Boundaries and Make Your Life Your Own Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist: The Narcissism Series, #1 Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Habits of the Household: Practicing the Story of God in Everyday Family Rhythms Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5What Makes Love Last?: How to Build Trust and Avoid Betrayal Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Everything I Know About Love: A Memoir Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5It's Not Supposed to Be This Way: Finding Unexpected Strength When Disappointments Leave You Shattered Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Doing Life with Your Adult Children: Keep Your Mouth Shut and the Welcome Mat Out Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Boundaries with Kids: How Healthy Choices Grow Healthy Children Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Art of Loving Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Maybe You Should Talk to Someone: the heartfelt, funny memoir by a New York Times bestselling therapist Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5
Reviews for The Fear Inside
0 ratings0 reviews
Book preview
The Fear Inside - Ralph Morrison
The
Fear
I N S I D E
Ralph Morrison
US%26UKLogoB%26Wnew.aiAuthorHouse™
1663 Liberty Drive
Bloomington, IN 47403
www.authorhouse.com
Phone: 1-800-839-8640
© 2013 Ralph Morrison. All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.
Published by AuthorHouse 6/27/2013
ISBN: 978-1-4817-7094-1 (sc)
ISBN: 978-1-4817-7093-4 (e)
Library of Congress Control Number: 2013911643
Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models,
and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.
Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.
Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.
Contents
Acknowledgements
Introduction
A World in Pain
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
You Called Me by Name
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Rear-view Mirror
Acknowledgements
I need to thank, first of all, my parents Doug and Irene for putting up with me and always trying to help me. I also would like to thank my brothers Randy and Gary, who were always there, even in my darkest times; my Uncle Ed and Aunt Reggie, for believing there was good inside my heart; and my three daughters, Keana, Kelsea, and Alexandra, who one day I hope will be able to say how proud they are of me. I love you all very much. Finally, I would like to thank my unseen angel for giving me the courage and support I needed to write this book. You know who you are, and you will always have a special place in my heart.
Introduction
I was a young boy growing up on a farm in Kelowna, British Columbia, Canada. Life was the same for me as for any young child. I had loving parents and two wonderful brothers. As I grew, I also had a secret that I buried inside myself. This is a story of how a bully can change and control your life, a story of what it’s like to hold a secret inside as it slowly eats away at your soul. I was too afraid to speak to the people that were close to me. From the age of seven to my present at age, fifty-two, fear controlled my life. This is not a success story. It’s a story of how fear can change you like a cancer spreading through you, constantly changing forms. My hope is that some who read this will be able to help themselves or someone they know to overcome and speak of their fears. Don’t do as I did. Don’t hold the fear inside, for it will destroy your heart and soul.
A World in Pain
Could anyone care for the words
I’ve held inside, nightmares unheard?
No one knew the fear inside.
I walked alone, without a guide.
The loving child that grew to hate,
Abuse and drugs had become my fate.
Every day, I prayed for death.
My world was black, I had nothing left.
Now an older man, not afraid to speak,
I share my story to help the weak.
Please don’t give up. Go share your fear
With someone close, someone dear.
We need to end this pain and strife
Before another soul takes his life …
Chapter 1
I grew up on a farm in Kelowna, British Columbia, Canada. I had loving parents and two older brothers. Life was great. We had a few cows, a horse, chickens, and a lot of room to play and explore. We spent most of our time outside playing and tending to the needs of farm life. Of course the chores weren’t so much fun, but we all needed to do our part. Like most parents in that time, our parents used farm chores as a punishment if we were out of line. Our parents never beat us or abused us. The farm was wonderful.
On special holidays, the neighbouring families all got together to celebrate. We went ice-skating on frozen ponds, had bonfires for Halloween, and had Easter egg hunts. There was always an adventure.
One of the neighboring families had eleven children. It was always easy to put a baseball team or soccer team together.
The youngest of the kids, I followed the older ones in all I did. I always looked up to my brothers and the others. Whether it was riding our bikes down the steep hills or riding the horses up into the mountains that surrounded our farms, I went along with their plans.
At one point my parents took my brothers and me aside to inform us they were taking in two more children as foster kids. They lived on another farm next to ours. I was too young to understand why, but I do remember a strange feeling when they joined our family. We now had a new brother and sister. I was still the youngest child.
My parents didn’t have much money, but they always provided everything we needed. My mother worked in a bank, and Dad worked at a boat-building plant. They worked at their jobs all week, and in the evenings and on weekends they worked on the farm, all of us helping where we could. My dad taught us how to care for the farm, and Mom taught us how to care for the home and ourselves. There was never a man’s job or a woman’s job; we all worked together to complete whatever tasks needed to be done.
We played different sports in the community—mostly baseball and soccer. I remember Mom and Dad coming to some of the events, but because of work they couldn’t attend all of them. In the farming community, a skating rink was built, and all the different families did their part to clean the ice and maintain the rink. It was outdoors in the fresh air. I always loved going to the rink.
We were a happy family.