"Mental Walks of Life"

Mental Walks of Life

Julio Toro

Copyright © 2008 by Julio Toro.

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Contents

Introduction

Mental Walks of Life

Oh Grandchild of Mine

Remembering Back Home

Disruptive Realities

Writer’s Prayer

Baby’s Arrival

Home With a Rising Sun

Parenting 101

Time (In Many Years)

The Great and Powerful Oak

Till Death Do Us Part

Broken Homes

Silent Morning

Hush Little Baby

A Moment To Share

Christmas Time

Window Pain

Review

Our Children So Far Away

Really Missing You

Have I Told You Lately?

Give Me Your Heart, Lend Me Your Hand

I Remember Sitting . . . 

Inspiring

Crossing Thoughts

Not Above God’s Law

A Child’s Imagination?

A Guiding Torch

Grandpa

Perhaps

Silent Screams

Winter For Larry

Your Beautiful Song

The Burden

In My Absence

Stay or Go?

The Cyber of My Life

Answers Sometimes Unknown

Day In The Sun

Children So Alone

I Had A Dream

Inner Sanity

Fellow American Lives

Time for Heroes

Once Again

Time Piece

Deeper Still

Light of Love

Self Counseling

Universal Connections

Special Child

So Many

At First

Life

Sleeping Pictures of You

Hold My Hand

Some Days

Beginning to Understand

Dreams?

Innocence Golden

Day of Valentine

Those Eyes

Come With Me

Let’s Talk

Crossroad

My Sweet Little Girl

Laying On This Bed

Overcoming

Last Night

A Tower’s Song

No More Criticism

Fields of Remembrance

Talking for Solutions

A Kiss and A Hug

Dream Encounter

Opening Doors

Our Garden

My Twin in The Pond

Portrait of A Crazy Man

Trust Me

These Hard Streets

Just Calling Me Dad

Lady of The Night

When I Kissed You

Loving Me True

The Great Ride

Blessed Soul

Coming to See You

Remember the Time?

Said My Goodbyes

Whispered Thoughts

Will You Always Be My Friend?

Sober Observations

Relax With Me For a While

Wondering Where I Stand

Mommy

Stolen Heart

Mental Notes

Come Closer

We of Unwelcome Clarity

The Times When I Miss You

Oh Vicious Pain

The Deepest Love

Season

A Choice

Rain Comes Down

Why the Anger?

A Friend’s Hurting Eyes

Young Love

Touch Me Softly, Caress My Face

Sleep, My Sweet

Sweet Home Town

Yesterday’s News

My Very Next Child

Forever My Girl

The Great Snake Ride

Good Byes

An Ode to My Greatest Love

Evermore?

The Road to Grandma’s House

Winds Blow Away

This Familiar Hilltop

This Old Floor

Mental Strolls

This poetic compilation I also dedicate, to my loving family, but mainly, to my grandson, who has given me a new perspective on life and its many happenings. Jaebien, I love you and your mom so much, may God cast blessings on you both, as he has on me, for life. Grandpa loves the baby.

Introduction

A large portion of this compilation was visually inspired by my loving grandson. As the next generation in our lives continues to grow, we learn to appreciate living so much more. Even though we have our moments of weakening or desperation, one tiny positive component can go a long way. Watching our beautiful children grow, watching the grandchildren run around. Even when good times and bad, happy times and sad, become the overall inspirations for our writing, a positive outlook sometimes takes that little extra ingredient, hence, for me, the little ones. A little kiss on the cheek from a little one or a little hug, gives new and extended meaning to life’s everyday moments. Sometimes we live for so many years, and yet, with the birth of one tiny new soul, and siblings, the process of nurturing commences again and we learn yet more, in addition to those many wonderful and educational years passed. Thinking as family would, we extend our hands so many times, to those around us and though sometimes we feel it to be a mute effort, the reward will self suffice. We must learn not just to give to receive, but to give from the heart and expect absolutely nothing in return for these efforts. It truly does seem that this has become a lost art. Throughout my years, and within my personal experiences, I offer this, my written deciphering. Perhaps you have children, grandchildren, brothers, sisters and then again, perhaps you do not. Keep in mind that family is not always immediate or the aforementioned. Family is also the group of people in your life that has given you experiences that in some shape or form, have helped you to relate to life, on a global level. All your cheers, all your pains, all your losses all your gains, those who have helped you to understand and go forth, become family as well. Under God, we are all brothers and sisters and in continuing this existence, join your family hand in hand and let your guidance be the moments which you share, amongst all that surround you every single day. Although living can be one of our most complicated efforts, our life and its endless addition of friends and family, is the most rewarding span that God could possibly offer us.

 Mental Walks of Life

So many steps I have proceeded to take.

Never really looking back, unless an error I make.

There are so many roads I could follow with pride.

There is no apparent reason, for my failures to hide.

Failures are main teachers, for we learn what not to repeat.

We take in the frustrations, then cancel their effects, unsweet.

Quite bitter, are many of the moments, we must live, in order to learn.

Yet we do not have to remain with them. They are but a mere turn.

Within the many walks, we will experience in our time.

Showing themselves at random, with no real sequential line.

Some may think they see and know it all.

Some may feel they’ve lived, through all the various types of falls.

Yet if they have all this knowledge and what it always takes . . .

Why do they continue to walk through, the same exact mistakes?

The steps in life are training, nothing less, but potentially more.

They are not all actual solutions. These come from your actual core.

The walks you take can show you, the many different choices.

Yet making them work, comes from your internal voices.

Haven’t you ever reached a crossroad, or mental intersection?

Then you realize that all along, there was only one real selection.

When you eliminate all the grandeur and confusing inner fog.

The right path comes somewhat easy, and here you make a mental log.

As you follow these examples, with present and future, in mind.

The options clearly come to you and selection is an easy find.

This I have learned truthfully, as I pass my knowledge on too.

To my family, friends and anyone, who takes a moment to listen through.

For though my walks may be a little different from yours,

they come back to one point, superbly.

Decisions made, will formulate who you are and teach you

about your life’s entire assembly.

 Oh Grandchild of Mine

Beautiful eyes capture my attention.

Beautiful face causes internal resurrection . . .

Of hopes, of dreams, of so many plans.

As I hold him up high, securing him in my hands.

Wonderful feeling deep, deep inside.

Feelings I can’t avoid, choose not to hide.

This may add years to me, according to others, in my circle of terms.

But the joy it provides for me, overbears that small concern.

Can’t get enough of his smile, his joyous laughter and loving squeezes?

Therefore I carry him in my heart, for this, my thought pleases.

Perhaps I too was this active, when this age I ponder.

Yet every ounce of energy he exerts, gives me renewed vigor.

As I play with him, talk with him, sit quietly while he explains.

His view of the world and the wonderful things it contains.

This is a baby. This is a dog. This is a mommy.

Then opening a book, pretending to read right beside me.

The Lord has given me many things, for which I need to say thanks.

Yet the main thing I will cherish, are my family,

and its refreshing concepts.

God how I’m thankful, for this blessed timing.

Where I can see my family’s future, through the eyes of one so tiny.

Here we go again, grandpa has to chase . . .

A loving little grandchild, with an alarming running pace.

But I wouldn’t trade the world, for this feeling I’ve been served.

As each and every day, I simply sit and observe . . .

Watching the growth of my family, though this may be simple for some.

Learning future lessons and patterns, led by this loving little grandson.

Though small in size and innocent, lessons are projected nonetheless.

As the days take on a new sunshine and provide new light for us to digest.

 Remembering Back Home

I can remember back home, the coffee, home grown.

The manual grinders, producing grounds, with a scent so well known.

I can remember the sugar cane fields, with sweetness unmatched.

The mango trees flourishing with fruit, worth climbing to the highest branch.

I can remember boyhood runs, through the guava fields.

Chasing around honey bees, always carrying a fishing rod and reel.

I can remember fishing in the river, catching a catfish and a few eels.

Loads of rain falling, as banana leaves drooped, from raindrops heavy as steel.

I can remember still standing there, as showers stopped,

and then beautiful blue skies.

Trying to focus on my fishing expedition,

wiping water from brows, trickling into my eyes.

I can remember lemon, pear and mandarin trees,

right in front of Grandma’s place.

So many times getting yelled at, for tossing rocks at fruit,

through leaves’ open space.

I can remember huge blades of grass spanning across giant fields to the neighbor’s wooden home.

The many times I crossed those fields, with a group of cousins, never alone.

I can remember the tractors cruising through, beginning their journey . . .

Forming huge ditches for the development of housing for many.

I can remember as though yesterday, the unique beauty of my homeland.

As I stand here near this highway, where there used to be endless, blessed sand.

I can remember, but can’t always picture, due the difference in appearance.

As I long for all the mountainsides and fields grazed by cattle’s presence.

I can remember so much, although the visual photographs are now changed.

For within my mental spectrum, my beautiful island will remain the same.

As I hope with all my strongest gestures, the image never fully fades.

So that when changes continue to occur, all my land’s grandeur,

is not completely taken away.

 Disruptive Realities

I thought I knew how life would turn out.

Then so many incidents caused my thoughts to reroute.

For within fantasies, I could live like a king.

Yet within realities, a different tune I’ve had to sing.

Looking into matters, we are not afforded made up pictures.

For life has a pattern, sort of like written scriptures.

A mistake we make, when overlooking these designs . . .

Can soon cause us delusions, toward which we may be blind.

Living has such formalities. Options sometimes misunderstood.

Life is full of technicalities, some bad, some for good.

As we pass our time, each and every instant.

We understand more, yet feel, from our security, distant.

Why do realities give us such wicked twists?

As we conceptualize in our minds, conclusions we cannot make exist.

For we see endings, true to our generated beliefs.

Yet receive a reality, on totally the other side of the leaf.

This is my future, is a statement we all make.

Then rephrase our words, when a different road we must take.

We end up somewhat satisfied with what we receive.

Our mind makes us accept this, though our curiosity is not relieved.

What if these realities, we would choose to challenge?

What if conceptually, we would not accept life’s homage?

To the way things must be, opposing it with what we make of them.

Taking charge of the natural order of things, replacing that mental stem.

Supplying our own forthright, making our own destination.

Regardless of life’s realities or our life’s intended regulation.

Taking command of the helm, setting courses for our ship of achievement.

Not halting at detouring realities, but steering around their concealment.

Soon we see a whole new world, one full of internal progression.

Then