How to Drink Snake Blood in Vietnam: And 101 Other Things Every Interesting Man Should Know

How to get rescued from a desert island

If only the characters in the hit TV series Lost had known how to get rescued from a desert island. We’d all have been spared all the flash-forwards and hydrogen bombs of the final interminable episodes. But not everyone is so clever.

Don’t bother writing SOS in the sand—the international sign of distress is in fact a triangle. Gather rocks, uproot plants and build a giant triangle for passing aircraft to see. Better still, build three fires—one for each point of the triangle.

Once your fires are burning, throw on a bunch of live, green plants and you’ve got yourself large plumes of gray smoke—the perfect signal to attract any passing ships. Chucking any stray copper coins on the fire will lead to eye-catching green flames.

Encourage curiosity by wearing bright clothes—the perfect excuse to rifle through that suitcase of women’s clothing that washed up on the beach.

Found a makeup mirror in your, ahem, man bag? Reflect the sun from the highest point of the island to attract any potential rescuers.

Leave a member of your party at one spot on the island, preferably at an access point such as the beach. Should anyone see your distress signals and come to your rescue, you won’t miss your chance to escape.

FIVE OF THE BEST: HOTEL ROOMS WITH HISTORY

The Churchill Suite, Mena House Oberoi Hotel, Cairo, Egypt

During World War II, Allied leader Winston Churchill met American President Franklin D. Roosevelt and Chinese General Chiang Kai-shek in a strategy meeting at this luxury hotel for what is today known as the Cairo Conference. Churchill was so taken with the view of the pyramids of Giza from his suite (room 623) that, apparently, he slept with his curtains open.

Monet Suite, Savoy, London, England

French impressionist Claude Monet painted up to seventy cityscape canvases of London from this very room. While in London, Monet would travel around the city, a blur of brush and canvas, touching up his masterpieces at different points of the day to capture the perfect light as it spread across the famous water of his beloved Thames.

Room 217, The Stanley Hotel, Estes Park, Colorado, United States

Inspiring a writer of horror stories isn’t exactly the pinnacle of hoteliers’ dreams, but add the greatest of them all and a Stanley Kubrick masterpiece into the mix and perhaps they’d run the risk of the negative paranormal publicity. Stephen King developed the plot of The Shining from a strong sense of fear while staying here—waking from a nightmare, he sketched out the story in a jiffy. Not missing a trick, the hotel runs the 1980 Jack Nicholson classic on a loop. Heeeere’s … room service!

Room 902, Amsterdam Hilton Hotel, Amsterdam, Netherlands

In early 1969, John Lennon and Yoko Ono sent acorns to various heads of state as a symbol for planting and growing new hope. In a follow-up stunt, using the publicity from their honeymoon during March 25–31, the famous lovers held a bed-in as a peace protest amid the backdrop of American civil rights unrest and the Vietnam War. The international press were invited to the room every day to prove the pair were sticking to their principles and not just watching daytime TV.

Room 100, Chelsea Hotel, New York, United States

After a tumultuous twenty-eight-month relationship between the Sex Pistols bassist Sid Vicious and groupie Nancy Spungen, on October 12, 1978, the latter was found dead in room 100. Arrested for murder, Sid never confessed to the crime and ended up dying of a heroin overdose before going to trial. The case has never been solved and Pistols fans the world over insist on Sid’s innocence, fingering a drug dealer who had visited the room earlier in the evening as their main suspect of choice.

Worldwide etiquette for waiting in line

The British love a good line—find the Fountain of Youth and they’d still conspire to form a line. The Brits hate people who cut and the rules of standing in line are a stern art worth remembering. Cut the line and prepare to feel the wrath of one hundred subdued but furtive reprimands—all very British and suppressed, of course, and muttered under the breath, never to the culprit’s face.

If there are two of you in line, it is acceptable to leave one of you waiting while the other disappears for a bathroom break; but, generally speaking, leaving the line will result in your having to join it again, at the back. Rarely can you leave your position and return to it minutes later.

Sometimes, if you ask the person behind you nicely and the vibe is right, you may be able to step out of the line and be let back into the same spot, but, generally speaking, this is frowned upon by the line police, i.e. everyone in the British Isles.

In the United States, the same rules apply. However, leaving the line for a few minutes—because you’re caught short or need to step out to make a phone call (but who does that nowadays?)—is considered perfectly acceptable as long as you inform the people in front and behind you that this is what you intend to do and ask them to hold your space. At the train station, if a train is leaving, people often cut in line to get a ticket before the train departs.

In Italy, and the majority of Europe for that matter, people will not form a line and the whole process of getting a taxi, for example, is a bit of a free-for-all.

In Spain and Cuba an actual line rarely forms. Instead store clerks or taxi drivers merely ask who is the first in line and everyone else waits for their turn to be served.

In Germany, priority is given to the elderly, who are often pushed right to the front of the line without even the slightest whiff of mutiny.

In former Communist states, particularly Eastern European countries, waiting in long lines was the bane of many people’s lives. Family members and friends would very often swap positions over several nights—even days at times—just to make sure they could claim their rations or get the last roll of toilet paper before the store closed again due to a lack of supplies. Not surprisingly, in these countries today people take little notice of lines and will very often cut in line, even in fancy places such as the opera. Line dodging is not the norm, however, and clerks and office attendants often refuse to serve those who do it—in general, if there’s a line, you’d best get in it.

Never write a Korean’s name in red ink … and other superstitions around the world

Mumbo-jumbo. Irrationality. The supernatural. Whatever you call it, superstition plays a massive part in people’s lives the world over. Here’s a brief guide to make sure you avoid pitfalls.

Korea

When in Korea, don’t write a person’s name in red ink—this indicates that someone is either dead or you want them dead. The number four is considered unlucky (the Korean and Chinese symbol resembles the symbol for death) and, for this reason, many buildings don’t have a fourth floor. But perhaps the weirdest and most irrational superstition of all is fan death—the belief that, should someone turn on an electric fan when the windows of a room are closed, the occupants of said room will die. One of the many reasons the 1980s pocket-fan craze (surely you didn’t miss it?) never caught on in Korea.

Australia

When making a toast always make eye contact with the person whose glass you clink or you’ll suffer seven years of bad sex. Or marriage, as most people call it.

Dagestan

The men of Dagestan furnish their porches with buckets of water in which to wash after a night of passion—the bigger the bucket, the better they are in the sack. Men in the know leave out two buckets filled to the brim. Real Lotharios fill up the garbage can.

Kazakhstan

Do not whistle in people’s homes: this will curse the owner with poverty.

China

Scissors, shears and knives given as gifts suggest to the recipient that you wish to end your relationship with them. Clocks, handkerchiefs and straw sandals should also be avoided, as they are associated with funerals and the dead. Be careful if you get married in China. White is a big no-no on the big day: it is the color attributed to death. Outward-opening fans are also banned on wedding days as the action of opening them symbolizes pushing people away.

Vietnam

Crossing your fingers doesn’t signify good luck; it is considered obscene.

Britain

Break a mirror and you get seven years bad luck, and bad luck for the rest of the day if you step on a crack in the pavement, walk under a ladder or if a black cat crosses your path.

Ireland

Brown and green should never be seen together except in the washing machine. Never put shoes on the table as this brings bad luck. And never open an umbrella inside the house. That’s also bad luck.

United States and other English-speaking countries

Fear of Friday the 13th, or friggatriskaidekaphobia for the academics among you, is a feeling that bad things are going to happen whenever Friday the 13th occurs. On the other hand, the makers of the horror film franchise of the same name are probably dancing in the aisles.

Bolivia

Zapatos sobre la mesa, cien años de pobreza translates as Shoes upon the table, one hundred years of poverty. Enough said.

Mexico

Many Mexicans believe that if you leave your wallet or purse on the floor, your money will walk away. For this very reason, many Mexican restaurants will offer visitors a hook for their purse or handbag.

Italy

Italians fear the number seventeen because the Roman numeral version (XVII) is an anagram of VIXI, which is Latin for I have lived, with the implication that the past tense means now I am dead. The Arabic numeral (17) also looks like a man hanging from the gallows. So probably best not to ask an Italian to play a game of hangman. Rather bizarrely, catching a nun’s eye is also believed to be unlucky. Should you do this, it can be quickly rectified by touching something made of iron or passing the bad luck on to the person next to you by saying Suora tua (your nun/sister) and tapping them on the shoulder.

Hungary

Always give flowers in odd numbers because bouquets with even numbers are only placed on graves. Don’t whistle indoors or you’ll be whistling your money away. Leaving the pointed end of a knife facing up or spilling salt will result in an argument, and should a bird fly into your house you should fear imminent death.

Russia

Never wear your clothes inside out unless you want someone to punch you. Russians never put on a new item of clothing before a test or exam, nor do they make their bed or cut their fingernails. Never celebrate someone’s birthday on any day but the actual one. And single people should avoid sitting at the corner of a table or they’ll spend seven years alone.

Egypt

Black cats, owls and crows are all bad omens. Never compliment a friend’s baby, as this is said to attract the attention of the evil eye. Opt for something bland like, Eeeouuw. Your baby is HIDEOUS! just to be on the safe side, of course. In much of the Arab world, look out for the evil eye, or ayin hasad (eye of envy). The evil eye visits those who show jealousy.

How to behave in the spas, hot springs, bathhouses and saunas of the world

Nowadays, taking a bath is no longer a once-a-week ritual, but part of the day-to-day routine for most of us. All we have to do is turn on the hot tap, add a whistling spurt or two of cold and hop into the bathtub with the latest Jackie Collins romance or, uh, Auto Trader. But it wasn’t so very long ago that an indoor bathroom was unheard of, and your grandparents were lucky if they got to play sardines with their siblings in a tin bath in the backyard. Before that people didn’t even have a tin bath in their garden or laundry room—they had to share a public bath with complete strangers, and very often in the nude.

Now, of course, for us pampered Westerners the public bath, or spa, is more a luxury than a necessity, although you can still get a taste of the real thing in countries like Turkey, Morocco and Russia.

Get yourself some modern-day bathing action at some of these bathhouse and sauna hotspots across the world.

Japanese onsen

One of the most de-stressing and therapeutic things to do in Japan—and, let’s face it, riding the bullet train and inventing head-turning gadgets can be a tiring business—is to take a soak in an onsen: a pool of spring water, warmed by volcanic heat and teeming with natural minerals. The Japanese believe onsen to have healing properties, and certain onsen offer specific therapeutic benefits, from healing light wounds to curing nausea.

The term onsen refers to a series of springs found in resorts in rural Japan—resembling an outdoor hot tub, few are found indoors. Sentos, the name for Japanese spas, are located in city centers but very often carry the onsen title as well, especially if