Academic Writing

Focus:
1. Cohesion
2. Coherence

Adiba Qonita Zahroh, M.Litt

FOCUS 1

Cohesion

AQZ 2
Cohesion: Definition

à This is how well your ideas follow from one to

the next with seamless/smooth and logical
transition.
à As you develop your paragraph, your ideas must
be related to each other and they should be
logically linked with referencing and linking
words.

Simply put, cohesion means flow.

AQZ 3
How to make your sentences cohesive?
It can involve the use of a number of devices, including

Linking devices Referencing Relative clauses

AQZ 4
 Linking Devices
Ordering/Time Cause and Effect Contrast Adding
First So** In contrast And**
Second Therefore But** Also
Finally Consequently, Thus However, On the other In addition
hand, On contrary
Before* Hence Although, Even though Moreover
After* Since, Given that Nevertheless, Anyway Furthermore
When For** In spite of What is more
While Because Despite Not only….but also
Then Because of Choice As well as
Meanwhile As Either…or
During For this reason Neither…nor
Note:
* = followed by verb+ing if it does not have a subject preceding it
** = CANNOT be used at the beginning of a sentence
AQZ 5
 Linking Devices: Exercise 1

**Please refer to the quiz from the link below**

https://forms.gle/ZHpBhS22FnQ2M3vN9

AQZ 6
 Linking Devices: Exercise 2

**Please refer to the document entitled ‘Linking Devices:

Exercise 2**

AQZ 7
 Referencing

à Referencing is a method of avoiding repeating

information in your writing. This is achieved by
substituting key noun groups with pronouns.

AQZ 8
 Referencing: So What with Repetition?
Repetition in writing can be both good and bad.

à shows a lack of writing skill or maturity as a writer and can

cause readers to feel bored due to the constant writing
patterns
à Example:
BAD In 2001 the income from North American DVD sales was 21 and
REPETITION then it rose to 25 and then it fell to 21 and the it fell again to 18.
à To make it better change its sentence structure:
Income from North American DVD sales reached a peak in
2004, at $25 billion, but then fell to a new low of $18 billion by
2010.

AQZ 9
 Referencing: So What with Repetition?
à Linking is necessary in order to help a reader follow the flow
of a text. Links do not always have to be made by means of
repetition, but they often are. The repetition is usually of a
single word or phrase rather than of a statement.
à Example: GOOD
“I felt happy because I saw the others were happy and because I REPETITION
knew I should feel happy, but I wasn’t really happy.”
From: Roberto Bolano, 2666
à The example is a good repetition for it emphasises
unexpected turn in the sentence that he only feels like he
should be happy rather than actually feeling true happiness.
à However, this type of repetition can only be good for writing
fiction, NOT FOR ACADEMIC.

AQZ 10
 Referencing: Pronouns

AQZ
11
 Referencing: Examples

EXAMPLE 1

Sales of new cars fell in 2009. This fall was particularly noticeable in larger
models.

Note:
In this case the word this replaces the fall in sales of new cars from the previous sentence.

AQZ 12
 Referencing: Examples

EXAMPLE 2

World population has risen dramatically over the past century. This rise is
particularly significant in India and China. Although China has the largest
population, it has made serious efforts to reduce its population.

Note:
In this example, This refers to the rise in world population. It refers to China. Its refers to Chinese
population.

AQZ 13
 Relative Clauses
à Relative clause is used to combine two sentences together that have the
same subject.
RULE EXAMPLE
who/that refer to people They caught a man who/that for China.
which/that refer to objects I lost the map which/that she gave me.
whose refers to possession She complains to the man whose dog bit her.
when refers to a moment in time Holiday is a day when everyone is happy.
where refers to a particular place We visited a house where our father was born.
In non-defining sentences, that cannot replace Mata Hari, who was a famous female spy, was born in Holland.
which/who. Buckingham Palace, which is in London, is a famous tourist site.

AQZ 14
 Relative Clauses: Defining and Non-defining

• It gives essential information, without it the main clause would have

a different sense
Defining Relative • That can be used in defining relative clauses in place of which or
Clause who
• A defining relative clause DOES NOT need commas.
• Example: The pharmacist who gave me this medicine said it would help.

• It adds extra information, but the main clause would have the same
sense without it.
Non-defining • That CANNOT BE USED in non-defining relative clauses.
Relative Clause • A non-defining relative clause is separated by commas, showing that
you can remove it without changing any meaning of the sentence.
• Example: My mother, who is a doctor, works in the maternity hospital.

AQZ 15
Let’s Practice

AQZ 16
 Referencing and Relative Clause: Exercise
Instruction:
Rewrite the following paragraph in a shorter, more coherent way, substituting pronouns for noun
groups where appropriate, and combining sentences using relative clauses. Pay attention to
punctuation as well. Write your answers in the Ms Word or Google Classroom’s comment section
and do peer reviews.

The graph shows the leisure activities of children at three different ages in three countries
in 2010. The graph shows the leisure activities of children at three different ages in 2010.
From all three groups of ages, it can be seen that there were some changes in the choices
of activities among the children. The data are calibrated in percentage.
The most popular sport for ten-year-old children in a three countries is soccer. Soccer is
played by 33% of all ten-year-old children. In Britain 60% of boys play soccer and 20% of
girls play soccer.
As children get older in all three countries, children play more video games. In America
78% of 12-year-old boys play video games. In America only 40% of teenage girls play video
games. In America the number of children playing video games increases to 92% of 15-
year-old boys.

AQZ 17
 FOCUS 2

Coherence

AQZ 18
Coherence: Definition

Coherence is categorising the

information within your response (how
you organise your idea logically).

Simply put, coherence means

“structure” of the paragraph.

AQZ 19
 Introductory Paragraph
• General Statements

Paragraph Structure
• Thesis Statement (Division of paragraph/what the essay will
do)

Body Paragraph 1 (BP 1)

Coherence:
• Topic Sentence 1
• Supporting Ideas (Reasons + Examples)
• Concluding Sentence

Body Paragraph 2 (BP 2)

• Topic Sentence 2
• Supporting Ideas (Reasons + Examples)
• Concluding Sentence

Conclusion
• Restatement of the main points
• NEVER add new ideas in the conclusion

AQZ 20