Download 3 Proven Attraction

Strategies

Im a big proponent of guys doing internal workinner game, focusing on what they
can control, etcin order to become more attractive, rather than focusing on
mastering lines, techniques and dogma.

In the video, I talked about three pillars of attraction:

State
Status
Intrigue

In todays download well go over them in details, and I have a real life transcript for
you at the end from one of our instructors interactions.

State
One of the quickest attractive things you can create is your state. When we say state
in the pick up world, we mean emotional state, as in how you are feeling, what energy
you are bringing and the mood youre projecting.

Most beginners think being in state means that you are super high energy and off the
wall, especially in bars and clubs. While this is an effective strategy for pushing your

2015 Nick Hoss



comfort zone and creating some simple attraction when youre a beginner, its not
truly being state. Its a crutch.

Being in state is like being a hot coal. Youre not bursting with flames and flickering
like crazy. Youre steady, consistent and warm. With prolonged contact you have the
ability to burn much deeper than a flame, yet you provide consistent heat, even if you
arent always as bright as a flame.

In other words, youre in control without feeding off of others. Youre rooted in
masculine energy and presence and know when to dial the excitement up or down.
Youre not hyper throughout the entire interaction believing that high energy means
high state. States change and youll use different states throughout an interaction.

For today, I want to show you how to increase your state early in an interaction and
early in the night. If you enter a bar with low state and never do anything about it,
youll have a slow, rough night. If you get into state early and can rock it for 20
minutes, youre probably good to go for the rest of the night.

To build state early in the night:

Approach within the first couple minutes of getting in the bar. If you know
approach anxiety is a problem for you, approach a girl before getting a drink
and making the rounds.
Take the right action despite how you feel. If there is a girl you like and you
dont feel up to it, approach her at that moment. Youll be in state faster than
you know it.

2015 Nick Hoss 2



Go get blown out a couple of times until you reach the point of indifference.
This means that after getting rejected three or four times you wont fear the
process of approaching. This happens partly because youll be getting socially
lubricated through the approaches and partly because getting blown out can
make you stop caring so much about the outcomeyou become less invested
in succeeding and more invested in the process of just finding another girl to
approach
Talk to people on your way to the bar or while youre in line, or talk to the staff
once youre inside.
Play the game Tell her, with your wingman. How the game works: if you say
something about a girl and your buddy says, tell her, you have to go up and tell
her what you just said. You will be surprised how this can work in your favor
and how it builds balls. Dont be a dick to your buddy though or hell get you
back.
Go and open with the intention of getting blown out. Its harder than you think
and it gets you going internally.
Stand in an attractive manner, have good posture or be leaning on something.
Move as if you are a spectacle to be looked at. Dont sit down after a blowout.
Choose how you feel. Seriously. If you get blown out, make the conscious
decision that you are going to feel good, or at least that youre not going to feel
bad. Place your focus on positive emotions and the next action you can take.
Your brain will place emphasis on that focus and guide your state toward it.
This takes practice but it works wonders.

2015 Nick Hoss 3



Transferring State To Build Attraction

Once your state is in the right place youll be able to transfer those positive, fun and
playful emotions over to the girls you approach. This can be done a zillion ways, and
here are just a few:
Using an opener that, for lack of a better term, fucks with her, rather than
compliments her
o Ex. Just cause Im a brown guy doesnt mean you cant talk to me, as
your opener, if youre Indian, and follow up by teasing her. Naw, its
cool if youre a racist.

Be playful. If you have high energy and you believe she is going to respond playfully, she
will, and that is when the tease works well. State, i.e. belief, makes it work.

Get into role plays or self-depreciating humor after your opener

o Ex. Were totally getting a divorce You keep the van, Ill take the dog.
o Ex. Your wingman. Ya, we totally met on Tinder. We used to be on
Grinder, but its harder to make friends on there.
o Ex. Were going to make such beautiful babies.
o Ex. Actually, my mom dropped me off here tonight Shes outside on
the head set. One second, and slightly turn and cover your ear and say,
Shes a XYZ mom. Is she cool? and describe the girl. Shell probably
laugh, so you can say, Ya, mom says youre cool, or Ya, mom doesnt
want me to loose my virginity to you tonight, but shell chaperon our first
date. Deal?

2015 Nick Hoss 4



If this sounds too absurd to you, you likely havent approached enough girls in bars
OR youre creating blockage for yourself about how girls will respond to you. You must
believe what youre saying is funny and you must enjoy saying it and seeing her laugh.
That has to be the root. If you cant wrap your head around that, go back to yesterdays
exercises. Back to tools

Teasing
o Ex. Youre from Australia! Ive always wanted to meet a real life bogan!
(Bogan is the Australian slang for trailer trash, essentially. Use Chav for
Britain, or gangster for a girl who is from Brooklyn, etc. Apply these to
your town.)
o Ex She says shes a teacher. I bet youre one of those hardcore teachers
who would put me in the thinking chair in the corner They call you
Miss what? and then call her Miss [last name] all night.
o Ex. Answer, Yes, Im single to any question she asks about you. Dont
use it more than once on the same girl.

Teasing becomes easier as you approach more girls and find out more about people in
general. Im not sure why teasing is so difficult for some guys. Remember, if you have
state it will be much easier for you to tease because youre mind will be more free
flowing and in the moment. You wont be analyzing everything she says or looking for
her positive reactions. State unlocks your ability to tease.

Takeaways

2015 Nick Hoss 5



o Playfully back-turn her when you have a petty disagreement. Ex. She says
she likes country music, but you like rap. Say, Were done as a joke,
and turn away slightly and then turn back.
o Look over the girls shoulder for a second when she is saying something
boring or uninteresting once you have some attraction built. This an
intermediate strategy.
o When youre ordering a drink at the bar with her, engage another girl
beside you (in nice guy talk). Or, when youre walking through the bar,
say hi in passing to a girl you talked to earlier in the night. These other
girls will respond positively because they see you have girl with you. Do
not linger on them. This is an advanced strategy.

Takeaways are a tool youll use sparingly. If youre a beginner, dont worry about them
too much until you get teasing and role plays down. Once you have those down youll
find it natural to integrate playful takeaways and the more serious ones will find their
place as you keep improving.

Status
The most misunderstood thing about status is that it is contextual. As I said in todays
video, you dont have to be Brad Pitt or Obama to attract women. Status is one tool of
many that can create attraction. Fortunately, if you have status in an environment it
speaks for you. And fortunately for Love Systems students, we can show you how to
frame your ho-hum status into something more attractive if you feel underequipped.

2015 Nick Hoss 6



In todays video, I already talked about framing status, such as how you position
yourself in a story. Always make yourself the focal point of your story. Be the guy the
story revolves around. A common beginner mistake is to tell stories about something
that happened to a friend or something youve observed. While entertaining and apt
filler, these stories dont build attraction.

If youre going to tell stories that display status do these things:

Be the leader
o People come to you or want you on board because you serve a purpose, not
because they want followers. Youre somebody people look toward and
seek out.
Play down your awesome shit as if it is no big deal, and play up you basic stuff
as really cool.
o Ex. Getting tables is how you roll when you go clubbing. You dont make
a point of mentioning you got a table. Its just serves as a location in your
story. (See next bullet.)
Dont make your stories about the status item. Ideally, youll have to slip in the
status item in passing as part of the story. It shouldnt be the focus of the story.
o Ex. A girl and I were one talking about our favorite clubs in Vegas and I
mentioned the last club I was at was Marquee. We discussed what we
liked about it and I said I didnt like that on my last visit our table was
moved inside halfway through the night. (It was so loud inside.)
Inadvertently, I mentioned that we had a table. I didnt say, We actually
got a table that night, like it was a rarity, or My buddies and I always

2015 Nick Hoss 7



get tables like were out to prove something. (Again: make your cool shit
sound like an everyday occurrence and shell assume it is.)

o Ex. Following me telling the girl that I liked being on the outside rather
than the inside of Marquee, she asked who the DJ was. I said Armin Van
Buuren. She freaked out and I showed her a picture and told her the story
of how he poured me a drink I couldnt name his songs, but the
context created status for me.
o As you get better at thinking on your feet, know how to manage your
state and remove blockages to your full expression, youre find ways to
insert these stories and steer conversations on to them. When you hit
gangster level, youll even drop in tidbits that force her to probe for
more info. (This ties into intrigue attraction.)

2015 Nick Hoss 8



Be aware of who you hang out with

This one is going to force some deep introspection for you. Youll either re-examine
your relationships, or youll think Im too overbearing. Ill explain why you should do
the former in a minute

If youre thinking that you have to dump all of your friends, especially after yesterdays
video and exercise on standards, Im here to tell you that you dont have to do that.
(Though it probably would help to flat-out cut out any losers youve kept around
because they are good guys.)

You want to be selective with the friends you hang out with when meeting women. As
a rule, this is the hierarchy of guys I want out with me when Im meeting women:
Guys who have status within the context
o If Im going to a house party, Im going to want to be good buddies with
the host or invite a guy to my house party who will bring hot girls. Ill
automatically assume his level of attractiveness.
o At a conference or in a club, Ill want to be in the VIP section.
o When I hit clubs 5 nights per week, these guys were promoters who
actually got the girls into the clubs. Its likely that these guys are decent
with women, but even if they arent their status does all the talking they
require.
Pick up guys or naturals who are better than me
o Theyll draw girls toward me.
o Our sum is greater than our parts.
o With no ego involved it can be a ton of fun.

2015 Nick Hoss 9



Nice guys who can talk and talk

o They will never blow me out and will not creep out the girls.
o Theyll also keep my girls friend occupied.
Pick up guys
o Back in the day, I would love to go out your average pick up guy because
we were learning together and helping each other. I highly recommend
this if youre beginning, absolutely.
o Once you start breaking through to a higher level, youll find you only
want to roll with guys as good as you or that youd rather lone wolf when
approaching than having beginner as a wing. Youll want to be with guys
who are high level, not who are on the journey.
o Bottom line: pick up guys are great wingmen when youre at that stage
where your social life is only doing pick up and you call your buddies
wingmen
Shy guys with good hearts
o This is my good guy category.
o I wont avoid these guys, and theyll be my friends on wing night or
vacation, but if Im out with, say, my Love Systems friends or
instructors, Im not going to make a point of inviting them to come meet
girls with me.
Negative dudes
o Guys who bitch about being at the bar, bitch about the girls, bitch, bitch,
bitch, and even sabotage your sets or talk down about you behind your
back.
o It helps in no way and they bail on you halfway through the night.

2015 Nick Hoss 10



o Get rid of these guys for the sake of your overall lifestyle, let alone girls.
They arent helping you, period.

Know that the first verification of your status or coolness is who you roll with. As soon
as you toss out your first tease or introduce the buddy youre with, the girl is going to
analyze you versus him and see where you fit in. If he is cool (or even if you perceive
him to be cooler than you), its likely shell assume you to be cooler than what youve
already presented to her. If your bud is a dud, shell start having questions pop into her
head and question, even if slightly, the image and story you present. Winners roll with
winners. By hanging out with high status guys you automatically make your life easier.
To get there, you may have to remove or reposition some of your friends.

Now, if this sounds a little too intense for you to meet girls, or if you just to have fun
with your friends, that may be why youre not meeting the girls you want. It goes back
to yesterdays exercise and video about the standards you keep and how you value
yourself as a whole. We talk a lot about dating and women because were Love
Systems, but the fact is that our instructors who have much bigger things going on in
their lives than running around bars see standards, values and self-worth as something
they emphasis and enforce in all areas of their life, including health, business and
family. Its beyond just meeting randos in a bar.

I know what Im preaching is true. If you ask any guy who has gotten past the beginner
stage of using Love Systems skills hell tell you that hes gravitating away from different
people, i.e. boring, non-social, unambitious friends, and drawing toward him new
people who are more outgoing and optimistic about life. Its natural because if you

2015 Nick Hoss 11



want to attract higher quality women, they are going to demand you be a higher quality
man. If youre dating 6s, you cant expect to date 9s and 10s if youre living the lifestyle
and maintaining 6 friends. 9 girls dont date 6 guys, and it should be vice versa.
It cant work. As I like to say, women dont bullshit you. If youre not on their level
they will figure it out or they will simply pass you off. They can pretend to like a
certain type of food or music, but they wont pretend to like you just so you can date
them. Its the empirical truth of evolution.

Lastly on this point: think of one skill you are really good at. Whether it is business,
martial arts, or even, I guess, video games, when youre playing for keeps, arent you
likely not associating with the beginners if you have some status? Its not that youre a
dick. You just cant perform at the level youre capable of when youre with them, and
while you were coming up the ranks, you probably had to earn the right to roll with the
big dogs. Same idea with your personal circle of friends. Start demanding this of
yourself and youll start attracting new people into your life. Be okay cutting away the
bottom feeders.

Status Is Contextual
Remember too that status is contextual. I could write a whole book on this topic, so
lets just narrow it down to how to dress as an example

How you dress says a lot about how your regard yourself. Its a signal for how people
should treat you. Dress as somebody with status within the social context and youll be
treated appropriately. For example, if youre a working professional or entrepreneur,
wear at least a blazer and cool shirt when you go out to meet women in clubs.

2015 Nick Hoss 12



However, if you want to meet punk rock girls, wearing this same attire to an indy club
will lower your status.

In rare cases, going against the grain can actually work in your favor too. A favorite
saying of mine is anything you can do that makes you stand out from the crowd while
still being consider cool is attractive. For example, when I was hardcore into going
out when I first moved to Texas, I swear I was the only guy in Uptown Dallas, the party
area, without a comb over. Tons of successful young corporate guys lived in the area
and went out to the bars, and they all looked the same. Meanwhile, I could go out,
dress up and still look like I had my shit together, BUT I also had long hair that nearly
touched my shoulders.

I would be the only guy in the bar with hair that long most nights. Girls loved it, would
grab it, etc. AND it wasnt because it was just a novelty, i.e. it wasnt for the sake of
being weird or different, like wearing a fuzzy cowboy hat. They thought it was sexy. If
you know what youre doing, a similar strategy can be powerful for you as part of a
complete package. Know your context, how you present yourself and the girls youre
meeting.

In my Virtual Day Game Workshop, I dive deeper into techniques like these and even
show you how you can target parts of your personality and life experience to bring
out the right status depending on the girl. What attracts the small town girl from
Minnesota who moved to New York will be much different than what attracts a
Russian girl in London or a Hollywood girl who is right from Los Angeles. However,

2015 Nick Hoss 13



Ive leveraged different parts of my life experience to make deep connections with all
of these types and I can show you how too.

Have Purpose
Im such a big believer in this. Listen up

As a man, part of your essence, your masculinity, is knowing where youre going in life
and what you want to achieve. Youre the hunter and warrior on a path to feed and
conquer. Progress creates confidence and inspires others toward you.

Men lead, women follow.

What I mean is that masculine energy takes on risk and leadership while feminine
energy looks for safety and supporting roles in relationships. If you dont believe me,
ask yourself who always sets up dates and asks the other party out. Tell me who is the
one feeding a baby from their breast? Why do guys who get too emotional too soon
and always do what the girl wants, which forces her into the leadership/masculine role,
always end up getting dumped?

Call me un-PC for 2015, but I think you get my point

So what is purpose and how do you get it?

Purpose is the over-arching purpose in life, that big thing that drives you and that you
are chasing. For me, its within my business. For others, its charity work. Some men
want to climb the corporate ladder to leave their mark on an industry while getting the

2015 Nick Hoss 14



funds to send their kids to an Ivy League school. Many men work and sacrifice in
certain areas of life so they can afford time and freedom to live their hobby to its
fullest, such as golf vacations, mountain climbing, entering salsa competitions.

What Im saying is that you require a driving force in your life, something to reach for
as part of self-actualization. Women LOVE this. It shows that you are passionate man.
They can join your adventures, and more so absorb the emotions that are radiated, i.e.
projected as is a masculine trait, by a guy who is enthused about what he does.

When you have this dialed in, you can talk about that seemingly boring piece of
software youre creating as if its going to change the world, even if youre one of five
people in your office who truly understands what it means to the company you work
for. Remember, women thrive on the emotions involving what youre passionate about
rather than the thing you are passionate about. (Read that again.)

So, if you are passionate about computer programming and all shes ever done with
her life is sling drinks for tips, shell likely admire the C++ work youre doing even if
she doesnt understand what C++ is. Youre an achiever and she should, hopefully,
appreciate that even if she doesnt exactly understand the nuts and bolts of its
complexity.

At the same time, if you are passionate about horseback riding and you meet a woman
with horses, youd have to go out of your way to not make a connection. Sometimes
the surface topic rather than emotion make the connection.

2015 Nick Hoss 15



So how does purpose tie into status?

Often enough, guys who are passionate have some status. Theyve achieved something.
If youre one of these guys its probably a no-brainer to you.

Also, people who have passion and purpose tend to be achievers. If you are passionate
about something or have a greater purpose driving you than just watching the sun go
up and down throughout life, youre probably on your way to success. That is
attractive. Its also a primal trigger that you are signifying the ability to obtain
resources when motivated to do so.

Purpose-driven guys also collect stables of skills, social connections, access to valuable
things, etc. because they have something to offer. They make good mates and fathers,
and for the sake of picking up in a bar they can be conceived to be more than a
dancing monkey in the moment. They have a lifestyle and standards.

Lastly, if goes without saying that guys who are purpose driven, who are working on
something that is bigger than themselves or that is of more importance than the
woman theyre dating, arent fuck ups. They send a signal that they wont go soft on the
girl, wont turn into a different guy once they sleep with her and maybe even will be
reliable since they have a course they are set on. If a woman can join that course, he
could be a good mate, i.e. guy to get close to.

Being passionate says all the right thing about you, and you dont have to be a rock star
to have purpose. The beauty part is that if you have purpose and know how to express

2015 Nick Hoss 16



it, youre likely ahead of most guys out there who just go through the motions in life.
(There is a lot of them!) Your purpose doesnt have to be something super sexy. What
it does have to be is something youre invested in and invested in for a good reason.
From there, its all about displaying WHY youre passionate about it. This is a
MAJOR component of my Virtual Day Game Seminar and how Ive found such great
success in day game. Im really proud of it and love showing guys how they can take
the things they are passionate about and use it to their advantage without weird lines
or routines. Its also easy because you dont have to come up with elaborate stories
you just talk about your purpose from a feeling and emotion based standpoint, rather
than a factual one. Anybody can do it (even you overly logical guys!)

Thats that with passion and purpose. What also screws guys up with status is money.
They think you need money to attract women. On the other side of the coin, guys
whove been around this pick up world for a while often get told that they dont require
money, at all, to pick up women. Im just going to give it to you straight

Money & Status

Heres the gist of money and girls:
You dont require money to attract women, but just because shes attracted, for
any reason, doesnt mean shell act on those feelings.
Money DOES help, but shes more attracted to what it represents and what it
affords you access to. Dollar bills and bank statements are just representations.
There are very, very few gold diggers out there. I wouldnt worry about them,
and if you do worry you have an inner game issue to sort out.

2015 Nick Hoss 17



Youre damned it you do and damned it you dontmy students without

money wish they had more money to attract women. My students with money
are worried that women only like them for their money and not the real them,
which can sometimes be worse. Different problems but problems nonetheless.
When it comes to long term commitment and relationships, a girl will NOT
date down compared to what she is used to. If a woman grew up in the
Hamptons or is a model living in Sydney, she does not want to live a pedestrian
lifestyle with you while 10 other guys offer to fly her to Italy for the weekend.
(Name me a pick up guy you know who dates a super model. I cant think of
any either.) You can sleep with her and date her, but its pretty darn rare
though I DO know pick up guys whove done it as a one-off, multiple times
that a woman gives up her status in life to date down. Thats just lifeuse it as
motivation or live in denial.

When you can get tickets to a front-row seat at a sporting event, that says something
about how you like to spend your free time. When you fly first class for business, that
says something about your ability to achieve goals. When you pay extra for organic
food, that says something about how you value your health.

If you sit in the upper bowl, fly next to the crying baby or eat McDonalds because that
is all you can afford, it gives off other signals about you.

So like I said, money does give you access to things. It makes your life easier and more
enjoyable. Money isnt everything, but it is a standardized way to quantify what you
have access to. In other words, when she sees the $10, 000 watch on your hand, it

2015 Nick Hoss 18



signals that shell probably be getting picked up in a new vehicle for the first date, not a
used Corolla, possibly like the one she has and hates.

I want to step back here before I fall into the standard dogma of comparing everything
to guys who are uber successful. We teach more uber successful clients than any other
company (look at the price of our bootcamps compared to others), but we also have a
lot of regular guys who pull in above average wages and want to date above average
girls or women. The idea of leveraging access is not something they are interesting in
playing at a deep level, and I can understand that.

So here are some bullets that you should understand when it comes to your personal
wealth and how you use it, no matter how much resources you have:
Always remember status is contextual.
o Wealth is a pretty good indicator of status.
o Ex. A university girl once went back to my 26 year old clients house and
said, Wow, how many room mates do you have? None, he replied.
She was blown away.
o Ex. I once co-hosted a condo party and the fact that we hired a DJ and
nobody was dancing on table impressed the 21 year-old I invited.
Older women look for different things than young girls.
o Ex. Im in my late 20s now and have dated, i.e. a relationship, women
ranging from teenagers to those in their 40s. Women in their 30s, for the
most part, like the flash but fall in love with the stability, purpose and
reliability a guy has. This means if you have a solid income, hopefully

2015 Nick Hoss 19



more than hers to be honest, and are constantly improving, you likely
check the box.
o A LOT of pick up dogma is geared toward club girls while at least a third
of my students are over 35. I like to teach stuff that attracts girl and
women.
Access is as good as money.
o If you cant get into the most exclusive club in the city with money, but
you make friends with a promoter and he gets you in, youre in the club.
The fact that you got through the door puts you on equal ground with the
other dudes and gals in there.
o This fucked me up the first few times when I would approach girls direct
in really high-end clubs in New York. In the best clubs nobody actually
approaches. You mingle, say hi and hang out. If you keep your nose
clean and chill out youll probably find some girl by the end of the night
since the door is so tight.
Bottle service helps greatly.
o If you cant afford bottles, and youre in the phase where youre going out
non-stop, find one club and befriend the bouncers/manager or a
promoter. Leverage these relationships to get you into the VIP. Life will
get easier in there even if youre not buying the bottles.
Dont talk about stuff you cant afford, and dont cite that something is not
the highest level.
o Ive taken girls to hockey games in every city Ive lived in in North
America. I always get seats at the top of the upper bowl. I tell them I have
the best seats because the top of the upper bowl (truly) is the best place to

2015 Nick Hoss 20



watch a hockey game since there is glass obstructing your view near the
ice The seats are also half the price.
o What Im getting at is that you can frame things from a different
perspective or at least dont highlight the fact that youre not spending
more. She likely doesnt care anyway.
o I know a couple of guys who have a lot of money to spend who purposely
dont until the fourth or fifth date but dangle clues like a carrot to make
the girl invest more, such as picking her up in their Porsche and then
grabbing a simple ice cream on the boardwalk.

Intrigue
Intrigue-based attraction often works best when you have spiked her buying
temperature. In other words, youve increased her state through teasing or role plays
first. As the interaction goes on, leading into the comfort phase of the Love Systems
model we teach, shell become more inquisitive and thats where intrigue works best as
a reinforcement.

What I mean by this is that she can know youre a fun guy when you raise her state, but
state is fleeting. Intrigue takes you from being a one-trick pony to a being a multi-
layered, attractive guy.

All that being said, intrigue-based attraction is as much about leaving details out as it is
about including them. Its a signal of status and the doorman to qualification. Its also
effective to building suspense in a conversation.

2015 Nick Hoss 21



So how do you do it? This:

Leave out specifics in your story
o Ex. My company is sending me away on business. Dont tell her where
and dont tell her what you do. This gets her asking questions and
probing deeper.
o Ex. A friend invited me over for dinner is another classic Im sure you
can figure out.
Be vague in a way that signals youre trying not to brag or that people often
become enamored with you if you reveal too much
o Ex. I work at a hospital if youre a doctor.
o Ex. I work in finance.
o I learned this from models who would say they work in advertising.
o Youll have to get decent at baiting girls for this to be effective.
Make a very specific, personal comment about her, especially if other guys
wouldnt know it
o Ex. When your meet a girl who is a hairdresser and you get her to tell you
why she became a hairdresser, say to her friend, You know her people
send off their scissors to get professionally sharpened? I aint messing
with her. Although shell probably giggle at the comment, she may be
more curious to know how I knew that info. Did I date a hair dresser
before? Are their stylists in my family?
o Ex. Learn how to say Cheers or My mom will love you or something
to that effect in a few foreign languages. This will work wonders when

2015 Nick Hoss 22



you meet a girl who is travelling. How does he know my language? Does he
understand where Im from? Why?

For the advanced guys out there: you may not want to lay too much intrigue-based
attraction triggers, or you may want to open loops with them but not close these loops
for her, if youre going to SNLs.

Real Life Transcript

Below is a transcript of one of our former instructors real interactions, and it looks like he
made notes in it for a student. (This instructor met his dream girl and is now married to a
beautiful blonde woman in Southern California.) I found this script buried in the back of
my computer and I think its invaluable to a student who is looking for a typical example of
a solid interaction. Its packed with classic attraction building material. Ive left it unedited.

See if you can pick out some of the tools from above as they are put to use

INSTRUCTOR
GIRL

Hey, youre cute you should talk to me (or: Ok, how do you expect me not to hit on
you when you look that adorable?) [Both delivered with a confident smile that shows you
are being playful and that you expect her to respond positive to you]

2015 Nick Hoss 23



Haha thanks, whats your name?

(Its loud in the bar and I pretend to misinterpret)
Huh? Oh ,Yea Im single. (smiling and giving her a look so she knows Im teasing)
(she laughs)
Im Gordie (hold out hand to shake hers)
Im Katie
Well, Katie youre cute but you look like trouble (give her a suspicious smile)
What? Im not trouble! Youre trouble!
You have no idea. You shouldnt even be talking to me (smile, pause, and hold
eye contact) Buttt, I know its hard not to because I have such a sweet ass so I
wont hold you at fault. But Just dont try to roofy my drink I know youre type!
Haha how did you know!?
I see right through you
Haha youre funny. So where are you from Gordie?
If by funny, you mean Im cute than yes. (Smile.) Ha, Im from Boston. I actually
just moved here a few weeks ago.
(Im leaving her bait here for her to ask why I moved so I can lay some attraction material
about my career without coming off bragging. If she doesnt take bait, I dont force it. I
would just leave it be. In this case she takes it:)
Oh really? What did you move here for, work?
Work, weather, good times on the reg, all of the above
So what do you do?
Ha, I guess the short way to answer that is just to say that Im an Entrepreneur
Ok?? (With a curious look but more eager than suspicious)

2015 Nick Hoss 24



Yeah well I have one company that operates back in Massachusetts, and I
basically just do all of the management over the phone and email. And now Im
working on an internet business with a couple of buddies which we can do from
pretty much anywhere so why not LA right? So how bout you, whats your story?
(Laughs.) My story? Ohh lets see.. well Im law school right now and Im working at
[restaurant], and I have one more year left of school before I get out there in the real
world.
Law school huh? (I pause just for a second and give her look that kind of reveals she
just earned a point in my eyes) Cute and smart? I like that. I recognize that I should
start to qualify her because at this point in the interaction I have already established some
ground attraction and her verbal compliance and investment are high.
So Attorney Katie, what do you like to do for fun?
For fun? This right here (laughs) (looking at her drink referring to partying and going
out)
(in the moment I had nothing to qualify her with based on her response so I defaulted with
more teasing as I usually do)
And trying to roofy cute guys drinks at the bar of course. I still got my eye you
on by the way
Well I hate to burst your bubble buster but I already did! Slipped it in when you
werent looking.
You sly dog. Youre a pro arent you? Am I like your 4th one this month? (I start to
introduce sexual frames here)
Sixth actually

2015 Nick Hoss 25



You are good. Fine, but can you at least make sure Im up for work. Not like last
time where you kept me cooked up all day for our wild bedroom passion fest. I
mean I have stuff I got to do babe. How else are the bills going to get paid?
No promises hunny. Last time was just so much fun though.
Yea it was but if we keep waking the neighbors up they are going to call the cops
on us sooner or later.
It will be worth it
Yea it will. (Pause, smile, look right at her with a look that shows you are picturing
what you would do to her in your head) I decide to physically escalate by moving her here
at this high point. I grab her hand and say: Come on, lets go grab a drink at the bar (I
dont ask. I just lead her and she follows)

(While we are at the bar, I pull in her close to me and put my arm around her) Ok what are
we drinking? (she doesnt flinch or seem uncomfortable so I know I can progress further on
the escalation later)
Umm, Vodka Red bull
Two vodka red bulls coming right up. (I turn my attention to the bartender to order
the drinks. While Im ordering drinks I have my arm around her waist standing side by
side- I start gently caressing her back and side, again testing for a clinch point)
(While waiting for drinks)
You know Katie, you dont seem like most of the pretty girls Ive met here so far.
You have this whole fun and playful vibe to you like a lot of my girl friends back
home. I totally dig it.
Thanks (big smile)

2015 Nick Hoss 26



(Teasing Takeaway after just hitting on her) Oh wait youre not totally like the lame
girl and pretending to be really fun to impress me but youre really just a big
dork, are you? ... I mean I would understand, theres a lot of stake here for you: I
mean Im like the coolest guy you ever met. Who would want to mess that up?
(Laughs) Shut up! So what do you do for fun Mister Dork!
Well, my passion is playing hockey.
Ice Hockey?
Yup. I love to play it, watch it, and I also coach it too You know what I love
about coaching high school kids?
What?
I really love coaching high school kids because you dont have to baby them and
you can be pretty hard on them, but at the same time they are still kids and really
look up to you. Its a really strong bond, I would do anything for those kids. I
think I enjoy it more than playing. (Demonstrating a softer side and a somewhat
protector of loved ones trait)
Awww, thats so sweet. You know I am so bad at ice skating. I tried it like once and
my butt was so sore the next day.
Ohhh we are so totally going ice skating. I love teaching people how to ice skate.
Ill have you skating like a pro in no time. They actually have open skate at that
rink in El Segundo like everyday at noon.
OK that would be so fun!
Yea for sure. Well can go sometime next week. Whats your number?
(I kept the plans vague and no real commitment and also went for the number without
making a big deal of it)
(Number exchange)

2015 Nick Hoss 27



(While we are shooting the shit some more, I text her just so I get her used to
complying via text with me to help reduce flakiness. Text: uh oh, I think youre
roofies are working)
Ok Katie so whats the craziest thing you did lately?
(Shes thinking.)
You know I can introduce you to any two people in this bar right now, and I can
guarantee that no one is as fun as we are right now.

2015 Nick Hoss 28